Essay Writing. Week 5. Principles of good writing: coherence, cohesion, unity.

PRINCIPLES OF GOOD WRITING

1. COHERENCE refers to the organization of the supporting sentences in a paragraph according to a principle. The principle of organization depends on
the type of paragraph.
Narrative paragraphs: chronological order. Use time order signals (finally, first, second, later, meanwhile, next, now, soon, at last, at 12.00, after a while,
after that, before beginning, in the morning, the next day etc.). Comma after a time signal that comes before the subject: e.g.:
Yesterday, I did homework for three hours. Exception: then, soon, now.
Process paragraphs: the order of the steps/ stages: step one, first, the first step
Descriptive paragraphs: spatial ordering describes the object as it appears in space (from left to right, from top to bottom etc.)
Expository paragraph: logical ordering of information depends on the writers view. Requires good coherence.
Opinion/argumentative paragraphs: logical ordering of arguments the writer must give reasons to support his/her point of view. Begin with the weakest
argument and end with the strongest.

2. COHESION refers to how the supporting sentences in a paragraph connect to each other in their support of the topic sentence. Cohesion is obtained
through the use of cohesive devices: coordinating conjunctions, subordinating conjunctions, transitions, prepositions, the definite article, personal
pronouns, demonstrative adjectives and pronouns.
Pronouns:
Anaphoric reference - > a word in a text refers back to other ideas in the text for its meaning.
Cataphoric reference -> a word refers to ideas later in the text.
Coordinating conjunctions.
Commas with coordinating conjunctions:
1. Connecting independent clauses:

April Fools Day was my favourite holiday as a child, and it is still fun for me as an adult.

Christmas is a national holiday, yet some people must work.

2. No comma if the clause that comes after the coordinating conjunction does not have a subject + verb structure.

Annie got up late and forgot to call her mother on Mothers Day.
*Do not begin sentences with coordinating conjunctions.
Subordinating conjunctions: after, as, before, until, when, while; because, since; although, even though; whereas, while; if.
John has always loved to read. He studied literature in college. -> Because/Since John has always liked to read, he studied literature in college.
(notice the use of the comma!)
When an adverbial clause beginning with while or whereas comes after an independent clause, you should use the comma. Joe is tall, while his
brother is short.
Transitions connectors used to link ideas > connect one part of a discourse with another.
for example, for instance; first, second, after that, later on, next, as a result consequently, therefore, however, in contrast, on the other hand,
furthermore, in addition, moreover, all in all, in conclusion, in short, in summary.
Transitions are set off by comma, no matter where they are.
e.g. For example, male cardinals are red. / Male cardinals, for example, are red.
If the transition is short, single-syllable, the comma is not necessary. e.g. First we went to the zoo.

3. UNITY all the supporting sentences should relate to the topic sentence. Sentences which do not belong to the paragraph are called irrelevant
sentences.

Essay Writing. Week 5. Principles of good writing: coherence, cohesion, unity.

1.1. Coherence. Identify each of these paragraphs as narrative,

descriptive, process, expository, or argumentative. Then look for
the sentences that break the organising principle of the
paragraphs and indicate their appropriate location.

2.1. Cohesion. The paragraph below lacks cohesion because it does

not have connectors, definite articles, personal pronouns, or
demonstrative pronouns. Rewrite the paragraph on a separate
sheet of paper in such a way as to improve its cohesion.

Native Wampanoag Clothes

The Wampanoag people, the native people who greeted the first
settlers to North America in the 1600s, wore functional clothing with
few decorations. A Wampanoag man usually wore a feather in his
long hair. On his feet, especially in the winter, he wore elk-skin
moccasins. His shirt was short-sleeved and made of deerskin. In cold
weather, a robe of beaver fur covered his shoulders as well. Around
his neck, he wore necklaces made of bones, shells, and claws. His
underwear was made of skunk fur, but his leggings were made of
deerskin. The ties that kept the leggings up were made from hemp
grown in the area. All in all, the first sightings of the Wampanoag
revealed a very practically dressed people.

The Pony Express

In 1860, Pony Express riders were loved because Pony Express riders
delivered mail in the U.S. relatively quickly, but Pony Express riders job
was very difficult. A typical day for a Pony Express rider began before
sunrise. A Pony Express rider took a mail bag and rode at a horses full
speed for twenty-five miles to a station. Then Pony Express rider jumped
off a horse and jumped on another horse, still carrying a mail bag. There
was no time for a Pony Express rider to stop and talk or even eat. Next,
Pony Express rider had to ride another twenty-five miles to a next station.
At a point, a Pony Express rider was only two-thirds finished with a trip.
By the end of the day, a Pony Express rider had to cover seventy-five
miles. Only then could a Pony Express rider rest and eat and get ready for
a next day. A Pony Express riders job was exhausting.

The History of Modern Razor Blades

King Camp Gillette, whose invention of the disposable razor blade
made his name world-famous, was an American who had spent 40
years looking for a saleable invention. The idea that changed his
fortunes occurred in 1895, but he met considerable difficulties
producing a thin, sharp blade that could be made cheaply. In 1903,
which was their first year of business, they produced only 51 razors.
However, due to intensive advertising, the potential of which Gillette
immediately recognised, they rapidly increased sales to 250,000 two
years later. He sold shares in the company to pay for the development
work that his partner, William Dickerson, was doing. The modern
razor, which is usually doublebladed, is directly related to the idea that
Gillette had over a hundred years ago.

2.2. Study the details of Napoleons life and complete the biography
below. Use one word for each gap.
*1769 born in Corsica
*1784 entered military school in
Paris
*1789 French revolution started
*1793 promoted to brigadier general
*1796 appointed to command army
of Italy; married Josephine
*1799 returned from Egypt and
became First Consul of France

*1807 France controlled most of

continental Europe
*1810 divorced Josephine and
married Marie-Louise, daughter of
the Austrian emperor
*1812 forced to retreat from Russia
*1814 exiled to Elba
*1815 defeated at Waterloo and
exiled to St Helena
*1821 died in exile

Paving the Way for the Romantic Movement

The literature of the second half of the eighteenth century presents a
tendency anticipatory of the Romantic Movement. The concept
Romantic is, therefore, wide and rich because it includes not only the
names of the most famous Romantic poets, but also those of literary
personalities who had announced the major shift in poetic sensibility.
Much that was new and distinctive in the work of Burns and Crabbe,
Cowper and Chatterton, Radcliffe and Walpole, marked them as
precursors of Romanticism. The extensions of their literary concerns
in the direction of passion and mystery, imagination and creativity,
and towards the fuller exploration of man and nature, may be
subsumed under the label Romantic, and so may their moving away
from the conventionalized forms of eighteenth-century literary
expression.

Napoleon entered military school at the age of 15, five years

a) the start of the French revolution. He rose quickly,
becoming brigadier general at 24 and commander of the Italian army
three years b) . At 30 he was effectively the French dictator,
and due to his military genius France controlled most of Europe
c) 1807. When he divorced his first wife, Josephine, in
1810, they had been married d) 14 years. His campaigns
were successful e) 1812, but in that year the disastrous
retreat from Moscow marked the start of his decline. However, f)
his years of absolute power he had made significant
changes to European law and government. Although he died nearly
200 years g), Napoleons influence is still felt throughout
the continent.

Changes in British Universities

In recent years all British universities have adopted the semester
system. Unlike terms, a semester is a period of time which lasts for
half the academic year. Semester 1, for example, starts in September
and finishes in January. Previously the academic year had been
divided into three terms: autumn, winter and spring. Most courses
consist of modules that last for one semester, and exams are held at
the end of each. Britain began using semesters to make it easier for
international students to move from one country to another.

2.3. Complete the following story by inserting suitable

conjunctions and transitions.
The group which became the Beatles was formed in 1960 by John
Lennon and Paul McCartney, with George Harrison and Ringo Starr
joining later. a) playing in small clubs for two years their
first record, Love Me Do, was released. She Loves You, in 1963, broke
all previous sales records in Britain. b) their simplicity, the
early Beatles songs c) Yesterday and Paperback Writer are
still seen as masterpieces of musical genius. d) , the unusual
haircuts and clothes worn by the Beatles fitted well with the style of
the mid-1960s. The popularity of the group soon spread to the USA

Essay Writing. Week 5. Principles of good writing: coherence, cohesion, unity.

and e) around the world, f) the media invented

the term Beatlemania to describe the excitement that was part of
their tours. g) their popularity the group were awarded the
MBE by the Queen in 1965, h) this caused anger among
some of the older holders of this award. In 1966 the Beatles stopped
live performances, i) their music was becoming too
complex to produce on stage. A year later Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts
Club Band was released, j) was immediately recognised as
one of the most influential works in the history of popular music. k)
, the pressures of fame were beginning to affect all the
members of the band, l) that they found it harder to work
together. They played together for the last time in 1969 and m)
split up in 1970.
2.4. Choose an appropriate transition from those listed between
brackets and write it in the blank. Add commas as necessary.
The Names of Hurricanes and Typhoons
The way hurricanes and typhoons are named has changed over the
years. Originally, weather forecasters described them by their position
in degrees of latitude and longitude. 1 . (in addition/for
example/but) a typhoon might have been called 21.20 north, 157.52
west. 2 . (then/ however / moreover) this method was confusing
because storms don't stay in the same place. 3 . (thus/ therefore/
in brief) people developed other ways to identify them. In the
Caribbean Sea, hurricanes were named for the Catholic saints' days. 4.
. (thus/ for instance/ moreover) a hurricane that struck an island
in the Caribbean on Saint Ann's Day was named Santa Ana. During
World War I, hurricanes and typhoons were named according to the
military alphabet: Able, Baker, Charlie, and so on. During World War
II, women's names began to be used 5 . (so/ therefore/ and) for
the next thirty-five years, weather forecasters talked about Typhoon
Alice or Hurricane Betsy. 6. (however/ then/ also) in the 1970s,
the women's liberation movement came along and forced weather
forecasters to use men's names, too. 7. (thus/as a result/finally)
after about 1975, a storm could be named Gertrude or George.
Currently, men's and women's names alternate: Alice, Bret, Carla,
David, Ellen, Frederick, and so on. 8. (to sum up/so/as a result),
the names of hurricanes and typhoons have changed for the better,
from boring numbers to familiar names reflecting social changes.
2.5. Combine each pair of sentences using the linking word given.
a. There has been strong European competition. We have secured the
order, all the same.
yet
b. The future for rain forests looks bleak. However, no one is giving
up.
although
c. There are many dissenters, yes. At the same time, there are many
who think as we do.
despite
d. I've always been honest about my feelings. You, on the other hand,
have not.
whereas
e. I know there is a moral code with regard to customers. Even so, I
think in this case we might go ahead.
spite

2.6. Improve the cohesion of the following paragraph using

linking words and other cohesive devices.
William Wordsworth was born in Cockermouth. William Wordsworth
was born in 1770. William Wordsworth was educated at Hawkshead.
Hawkshead is near Esthwaite Water. William Wordsworth then
studied at Cambridge. William Wordsworth was 21 years old and
William Wordsworth visited France. In France William Wordsworth
was infected with revolutionary fervor. William Wordsworth fell in
love with a royalist surgeons daughter. The daughters name was
Annette Vallon. William Wordsworth had a child by Annette Vallon.
William Wordsworth did not marry Annette Vallon. William
Wordsworth tried to support Annette Vallon and their child. The
relations between France and Britain got worse. William Wordsworth
could not go to France. William Wordsworth has not seen Annette
Vallon and their daughter for many years.
3. Unity. Analyse the following paragraphs and cross out the
sentences that are not about the controlling idea.
A National Treasure
Pha That Luang is a beautiful monument to the independence of
Laotian people. On top of a hill in the capital city, Pha That Luang can
be seen for miles. In fact, when I first saw it, I was at least 10 miles
away. Its base is a square with four walls that look like large lotus
petals. At each corner there is a stupa, and there is one gate at each of
the four sides. The gates open onto stairs that take you to the second
level. The second level is another smaller square with 30 stupas
surrounding it. The third level has the grandest stupa in the middle. It
reaches 45 metres from the base of the monument to its top. It is
shaped like a long lotus bud, and on top of it there is a decoration that
looks like a banana flower with an umbrella on its top. The whole
monument is covered in shining gold leaf. Indeed, Pha That Luang
truly is a treasure for the Laotian people.
Blake and the Power of Imagination
William Blakes immense imaginative power, despite the
repetitiousness of his energetic rhetoric, is no recipe for clarity or for
neatness of design. Of course, Blakes oppositions between the native
goodness of man and the corruptions of society, between the full range
of imaginative and emotional expressiveness and the inhibiting effects
of the rational and the institutional, intensify familiar late eighteenthcentury drifts towards the cultivation of sensibility and feeling. The
cherished picture of Blake and his wife sitting naked in their garden,
reading Paradise Lost aloud under their vine (Come in, it is only
Adam and Eve, he is reputed to have said in greeting a caller) does
justice to his unapologetic idealism. Blakes sense of mans nature as
being dismembered by conventional religious and social codes,
especially his protest against the severance of the spiritual from the
physical, is perceptively diagnostic of the human condition. Blakes
religion of the imagination cherishes a human wholeness
comprehensive enough to embrace forces that reason and tradition
have regarded as irreconcilable.
Exercises taken or adapted from: Bailey, Stephen, Academic Writing, Boardman, Cynthia A. & Jia Frydenberg. Writing to
Communicate. Paragraphs and Essays. Daiches, David. A Critical History of English Literature, Oshima, Alice & Ann Hogue.
Introduction to Academic Writing. Savage, Alice & Masoud Shafiei. Effective Academic Writing 1. The Paragraph.