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Slang words that hospitals use, some are

funny
Most of the definitions on the following lexicon of medical slang appeared
a few years ago in the National Lampoon. Some of the definitions are
funny. Most are sick. All are used in respected hospitals.
===========================================================================

Carnality

BOBBING FOR APPLES: Using the finger to unclog a severely constipated

patient.

Entertainment

F.L.K.: "Funny-looking Kid." Usually a mongoloid.

Technology

Why Can't Brits

Prnounce My
Surname?
German slang
Welcome Our New
Mods BSK and Zay
What are your
language goals? Let's
revive CL.
Ask me questions
about Japanese.
Are there any
advantages to asian
writing sytems?
Is a lie a fact or an
opinion?
German

F.L.P.: Parents of an F.L.K.

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CRUMP, GORK, VEDGY: A patient requiring intensive care, incapable of

movement, and
CROCK: Hypochondriac.

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MARRIAGEABLE MONSTER: A young female patient who has successfully undergone

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GOMER: A senile, messy, or highly unpleasant patient.

FASCINOMA: A "fascinating" tumor; any interesting or amusing malignancy.
DROOLER: A catatonic patient.
CUT AND PASTE: To open a patient, discover that there is no hope, and
immediately sew him up. Well, almost immediately. Sometimes young
surgeons practice surgical techniques for a while first.

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totse.com | Slang words that hospitals use, some are funny

FOUR F-ER: A gallbladder patient. "Fat, forty-ish, flatulent female."

PINKY CHEATER: Latex finger cover used in gynecological and proctological
examinations.
ROAD MAP: Injuries incurred by going through a car windshield face first.
A HOLE-IN-ONE: A gunshot wound through the mouth or rectum.
THE "O" SIGN: The letter O as formed by a patient's gaping mouth.

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THE "Q" SIGN: A patient giving the O sign with his tongue hanging out.
THE DOTTED Q: The "Q" sign, with a fly on the tongue.
SIDEWALK SOUFFLE: A patient who has fallen from a building.
LOOSE CHANGE: A dangling limb in need of amputation.
BULL IN THE RING: A blocked large intestine.
GONE CAMPING: Reference to a patient in an oxygen tent.
EATING IN: Intravenous feeding.
BORDEAUX: Urine with blood in it.

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SCRATCH AND SNIFF: A gynecological examination.

ANGEL LUST: A male cadaver with an erection.
HIT AND RUN: The act of operating quickly so as not to be late for another
engagement.
CAPTAIN KANGAROO: Chairman of a pediatrics department.
ROOTERS: Indigents and hangers-on who gather in big-city emergency rooms in
order to be entertained by legitimate cases.
SHORT-ORDER-CHEFS: Morgue workers.

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5.8.2008

totse.com | Slang words that hospitals use, some are funny

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LOOP THE LOOP: Flamboyant surgical rearrangement of the intestines.

BUGS IN THE RUG: Pubic lice.
HEY DOCS: Alcoholics handcuffed to wheelchairs in big-city medical wards
who, at the sight of a white coat, bleat out in chorus, "Hey, Doc!"
BLOWN MIND: Gunshot wound to the head.
BOOGIE, GOOBER: A tumor.
THE DEEP FRY: Cobalt therapy.
ROASTED GOOBER: A tumor after intensive cobalt treatment.
HEALTHY GOOBER: A dead patient.
BURY THE HATCHET: Accidently leaving a surgical instrument inside a
patient.
BOTTLE RETURN: Removal of a bottle that is vacuum-jammed in the anal canal,
usually of a homosexual.
SILVER GOOSE, SILVER STALLION: Proctoscope.
SQUASH: Brain.
GAS PASSER: Anesthesiologist.
CRISPY CRITTUR: A patient with severe burns.
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