Nydia Holguin

Jennifer Rodrick
QS 115
7 November 2016

Why Conform?
Throughout society and the knowledge people seem to have surrounding what is
right or wrong with it reality becomes sort of impulsive. The truth comes out to them
unconsciously setting boundaries to identify social groups and keep conformity to sustainability.
In the LGBT community conformity is their best way of going without humiliation. Their true
identity becomes disguised for their social acceptance. To outsiders and sadly themselves it
causes isolation which indicates that conformity is the only way from preventing discrimination
and alienation.
People conform for many reasons such as they don't want their opinions to be
acknowledged, they dont want to be outcasts, but most importantly they dont want to express
their true identity because of the boundaries they will cross if they come out. To the world
knowing the dangers that this community faces on a day to day basis requires them to hide and
conform at the expense of a prejudice free while. In the article by Andrew Sullivan, What is a
Homosexual? , Sullivan discusses his experiences of realizing his sexuality as well as learning
to hide it, to not become the center of ridicule. When he mentions, The experience of growing
up profoundly different in emotional and psychological make up inevitably alters a person's self
perception tends to make him or her more wary and distant, more attuned to appearance and its

foibles more self-conscious and perhaps more reflective (Sullivan 4). Sullivan reaches the topic
of distance in which it becomes this permanent quarantine to these individuals from society to
distinguish the obvious differences between the rejects and the conformists. Appearance
shouldnt matter in society and yet for the people who hide their true self because of rejection it
becomes this cage to keep them safe and unnoticed. The reality is conformists dont enjoy life to
the fullest and Sullivan was living in the shadows of society by conforming himself into a nerd to
not be recognized and avoid attention, basically anything that would allow those in his school to
treat him differently and humiliate him overall.
The reality of life is that nobody wants to be on the opposite side acception. I
personally believe that rejection is the key component of societys role in presenting these
positions of conformity. In the image below the true feelings of a male converted female are
exposed to indicate that she wanted to be this person that
was looking for acceptance through the eyes of others
surrounding her. She says, . I wanted to be part of the
acceptance of gays in America (Tumblr.com) to express
that this person would be fine hiding some of their own
identity to prevent the ultimate humiliation. The sad truth
is people will reject and try to make themselves believe
that they are not what they are actually meant to be but instead are becoming submissive to the
outside world. A lot of people arent informed on the LGBT community or anything for that
matter and because of not knowing or making the effort to learn about it they become these blind
people on the subject. When people find out more on the community they begin to contribute and

to identify the flaws that may be fixed in society to prevent or subsidize the amount of public
shaming toward the community. The hate that majority of the community receives is because of
their experience, such as confrontations or even family contributions to this topic. Many are
taught to love and respect everyone as who they are whether it is gender, race, sexuality, or
culture because they are only human and thats everything we will ever have in common. Yet on
the other hand others are taught to reject, shame, and discriminate anyone who doesnt look like
them, act like them, or follow the same morals as they do.
Conformity is being normal and not showing or having anyone find out about the real
you and definitely brings sadness and deprivation of positive human interaction. In the article,
The Sadness of Conformity, by Kristine Houghton, she mentions the sadness of how people
would rather suffer becoming someone who can blend in with society and not be shamed as
opposed to being your own person and live happily with who you are. She mentions, Our
society is not tolerant of the person who chooses a lifestyle that is not considered the norm.
During the past month the news was filled with the tragic story of how being different cost one
young man his life. He was gay, and because of his life choice he endured savage and public
humiliation at the hands of his roommates sick idea of a joke. The joke led the young man to
commit suicide (Houghton) explaining that these ideals of normality in society lead to
devastating impacts on a person's life. The accepting in society isnt tolerant of those that choose
to go against this normality causing negative outcomes such as bullying, mental illness, and
potentially even suicide.
When it comes to public figures that had to go against society for the good of themselves
Ellen Degeneres is a great example. Ellen DeGeneres is one of many public LGBT members that

embraces who she is and is happy doing so, but not everything was like that when she first came
out. Ellen DeGeneres was rejected by many and being in the public eye many gave the
impression that if she is this public person she will encourage people to be like her. Being like
her? You mean Lesbian? Well they were wrong nobody for that matter will encourage anyone to
change their sexuality. She even shamed herself for being in hiding to the reality of her sexual
orientation because she knew she could have been happy being who she was born to be and
express what made her Ellen DeGeneres. The mentality of those who do not accept will find
anything to blame for the abnormal behavior they are encountering. This video along with the
other videos from her particular segment of Makers is very brief with a very important message
of how to believe in yourself without questioning what you like what you are and all the other
questions that tie into society (http://www.makers.com/moments/better-society ). With many
other LGBT members coming out to the public eye more awareness is becoming available to the
protection of the community such as campaigns, movements, and events to allow those to
express themselves without discrimination as human beings should.
Being unique is sadly not something everyone wants to be just because they are terrified
of the outcome to what people will say when in reality people shouldnt be scared to hide who
they want to be. Although there are many people that do come out and receive support majority
are shamed and dont receive support, some dont have enough encouragement to come out to
friends or family so they find an escape to hide themselves from the outside world without being
judged. The article, Diversity: Pride in Science by M. Mitchell Waldrop explains how science
became this safe haven to many members of the community that didn't feel safe telling anyone
outside of the laboratory about their sexuality. Justin Trotter is a neuroscience postdoc at

Stanford University which said, My only escape was to work in the lab it was my
haven(Waldrop). Keep in mind this is a twelve year old boy at the time that he says these
words. Society pressures at all ages to decide between this or that without another option that
comes out with the same result. Society will always find a reason to judge and by Justin Trotter
to find an escape from facing the exclusion he knew he would receive at such a young age is the
reality of how these social norms contribute to personal feelings and actions. Eventually Justin
Trotter comes out and he explains his depression lifting and his work becoming more focused,
displays his personal achievement of finding people that enjoyed what he did and it was working
in the lab meeting people slowly who were also part of the community. The article also mentions
why science is being choosing to be this sanctuary to those that want to hide. Science focuses on
facts and information not identity which is a big reason why many feel good being in the lab as
Justin Trotter has stated.
People are bounded by social norms and the fear of not being a part of a
supportive community. Others have it better than others but the subjugation society has on the
LGBT community have it hard in wanting to accept themselves as who they are meant to be or
changing so that society doesnt shun or ridicule them. Society drives the community through
experiences shared by others or situations that have happened which then motivates them to
either come out, hide out, or neglect the reality that they are to sacred to face. Conformity may or
will always become this issue of finding yourself or hiding yourself amongst the normal views
of society.

Work Cited
1. Sullivan, Andrew. What Is a Homosexual?, From Sullivans book, Virtually Normal:
An Argument about: Homosexuality 1995.
https://moodle.csun.edu/pluginfile.php/4025928/mod_resource/content/1/a.%20sullivan.p
df
2.

Google Images LGBT Quotes www.tumblr.com

3.

Ellen DeGeneres on Makers segment Posted on

http://www.makers.com/moments/better-society

4. Waldrop, Mitchell M. Diversity: Pride in Science. Nature International Weekly

Journal of Science, vol. 513, no. 7518, September 2014, pp. 297-300.
http://www.nature.com/news/diversity-pride-in-science-1.15924?WT.ec_id=NEWS-2014
0916
5. Houghton, Kristen. The Sadness of Conformity. The Huffington Post. October 2010.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kristen-houghton/being-different-the-sadne_b_766626.ht
ml