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That Which Lies Hidden (inspired by xXTailo-Lives-OnXx)

By DixieHellcat

1 The afternoon my life changed did not include a bolt of lightning, or a signpost
warning the Twilight Zone lay ahead. Rather, it was like any other Friday afternoon
in Las Vegas, with me navigating rush hour traffic, hoping my on-and-off boyfriend
hadnt forgotten our dinner date, and wishing there was a support group for
women with shitty taste in men. Sure, Zak was good looking, smart, and had a
decent job; he was quiet, and responsible, and conscientious; but sometimes he
was too quiet even for me. Im no party girl, but this guy made me look wild. He
was chilly, reserved, withdrawn even at times. It was like pulling teeth to get him
out of his small apartment for anything beyond the necessities. My previous
boyfriends had, for all their various faults, at least had some personality.
Hi, Im Claire, and I have man issues.
Hi, Claire.
With a sigh, I pulled into our complex and headed up the stairs to his top-floor
apartment, fishing the key out of my purse. Not that a key does a girl much good
when she has to ask permission to use it. Zak was so self-protective it bordered on
universal suspicion, and pushing the limits led to unpleasant outbursts of temper.
He always apologized afterwards, though. He apologized for everything, it seemed.
Outside his door I paused, hearing Zaks voice inside. It sounded as if he was on
the phone. Im sorry, Im so damned sorryI know, it was my fault, Im not
going to make excuses, that just makes itmeeven more patheticbut I love
both you guys, and knowing what I did to youyou cant say anything I havent
already said to myselfknowing Ill never see you again, and Aaron, he even left
town so he wouldnt risk it
His voice cracked, and my breath caught; was he crying? Who was on that phone
and what the hell was going on? I knocked, just so he couldnt accuse me of
sneaking in. Zak Bagans? Vegas PD, were comin in! I called. I tried to tease with
him, joke and cut up, but he rarely if ever rose to the bait. After dating him for
most of the past year and sleeping with him for almost that long, I wondered
sometimes why I even bothered.
As I let myself in Zak was getting up from the couch, phone still to his ear. His tie
hung loose around his neck and the cuffs of his dress shirt were unbuttonedeven

in the warmth of a Vegas spring he wore long sleeves all the time, to hide the
tattoos he was so ashamed of. His face was resolutely turned away from the door.
Listen, somebodys coming in, Ive gotta go. Thanks for calling. Talk to you later,
maybe. Bye.
Hey, hon. I crossed the room as he put the phone down. He rubbed his face
before turning to me, but couldnt hide the redness of his eyes. I played utter
innocent. Zak? Whats wrong? Are you okay?
Im fine. I tried to continue, but he cut me off. I said Im fine! he snapped
before catching himself. Im sorry, Claire. Its justthat was an old friend. We had
a, a violent falling out, a couple of years ago, and hearing from him upset me a
little, thats all.
Faced with a pat cover story, there wasnt much I could say. I hugged him and felt
his tense body relax just a hair. When I stepped back though, my eye caught a
washcloth wrapped around his hand. What happened there?
Oh, um, that. Would you believe, the bathroom mirror came loose? I cut my hand
trying to catch it. Lousy installation. At least when you have your own house, you
only have yourself to blame for that kind of thing.
Want some help bandaging it up? And are we still on for dinner?
I reached for his hand but he smoothly avoided my grasp. Dinner? Yeah, I guess
so. Ill go fix thisno, Im good, you wait here.
As soon as he was out of sight I went for his phone. I may only be an
administrative assistant, but you dont eat lunch with CSIs every day for six years
without learning a few things. I wrote the number on my hand, then checked the
contact list. That convo sounded more like an old flame than an old friend. The
number was listed under contacts as simply Nick. That gave me pause. So maybe
Zak was bi? Hell of a time to find that out. I copied the number onto the note pad
in my purse, then went into the bedroom.
Claire, lets stay in tonight, Zak said from the bathroom. Im in no mood to go
out on the town.
On the town? You make a plate of spaghetti sound like a night of debauchery.
Youre a hermit, Zak. Next thing I know, youll have stringy hair down to your butt
and be wearing tissue boxes on your feet. Vegas knows from hermits, you know.
He stepped out, not laughing. He never laughed, or smiled, and his eyes were the
same dull green all the time, with a distant air that made me wonder sometimes if

he did drugs. At least this time he looked me in the eye. Hermits dont do this, he
said, pushed me back onto the bed and climbed on top.
Oh shit, he wants to have sex again. Dont get me wrong, I love sex as much as the
next girl, but shouldnt it be a two-way street? Zak never showed any interest in
my pleasure. So while he pulled my panties down, unzipped his fly and pounded
away, I lay there getting just enough stimulation to frustrate me, mentally making
a grocery list and trying to decide what book to read next. After he finished, and I
threw in a few ohs and ahs for appearances sake, I said, Cmon, Zak, lets just
go get something to eat. Ive been dreaming about this spaghetti all week. We
could even get it to go and bring it back.
Fine, whatever, he grumbled. Ill change my shirt.
Great, thanks. I kissed him quickly. Let me run in the bathroom and clean up,
and Ill wait for you in the living room. That was another quirk he had; his body
was hot, but he never undressed in front of me. It was those tattoos, he said, those
childish mistakes that embarrassed him so much he didnt even want me to see
them.
I cleaned up, and along the way washed the phone number off my hand, glad he
hadnt noticed it. In the living room, I sat down on the couch and began idly
playing with the tv remote. The set came on the Travel Channel and an ad for the
new ep of Man Vs Food, which I love, was on. Then some spooky music sounded
and a title card reading Ghost Adventures popped up. What a dopey name! I
thought; but Im fond of the paranormalmy uncle Bobby is a self-taught expert
so I stayed put. A burly bearded bald guy with a camera stood in the middle of a
dark room talking to himself, or, apparently, to a ghost supposedly present. After a
minute, the scene changed to two other men. One of them, though night-vision
green flatters nobody, slightly resembled a punked-out Zak. It made me snicker,
and I picked up the remote to turn the volume up. Hey, Zak, I called over my
shoulder in the general direction of the bedroom, this should give you a laugh. Do
you have a long lost
A hand reached over my shoulder, plucked the remote from my hand and hurled it
across the room. It struck the tv and exploded in a burst of plastic shards and AA
batteries. The impact was so hard, it knocked the cheap small set off the table on
which it sat and to the floor with a crash. The hand landed on my shoulder and
jerked me around. Zaks face was red with fury. Dont ever turn that shit on my tv
in my place. EVER! Understand?

My jaw dropped, and then I picked it up. Perfectly, I said. I shook his hand off,
grabbed my purse and got up. Dont worry. I wont be using your tv anymore.
Probably wont be in your place anymore, either. Bye.
Of course, five seconds after I walked out, Zak was calling from his door, begging
me to come back. I didnt turn around. Id had enough.
He didnt follow me, and I went home, to my own little pad across the parking lot,
with some leftover curry in the fridge, and my faithful vibrator in the dresser
drawer to finish what he hadnt. The hell of it was, when I used it, I still thought of
him: not the distracted, preoccupied Zak intent only on getting himself off, but a
Zak who looked at me, who saw me not as just a convenient piece of ass, but as a
friend, companion, lover and beloved.
While I heated up supper & ate, I pondered the phone number Id pilfered. To call
or not to call? What would I say if I did? Was it any of my business? I had no
answers, but the memory of the tears in Zaks eyes made me reach for the phone
anyway. For all his weaknesses, I did care about him, dammit. Whoever was on the
other end of that phone had made him cry, and I wanted to know who and why.
The number was a local one. Hello? said a mans voice.
Hi. Um, do you know a man named Zak Bagans?
There was a long pause.Who wants to know?
Time to shit or get off the pot, as Uncle Bobby was fond of saying, though never in
my hearing. He did his best not to corrupt me, unsuccessfully, as it turned out. My
name is Claire Browning. Im, uhZak and I have been dating for a while. When I
went over to his apartment today he was on the phone. He was very upset but
wouldnt say why, only that hed heard from an old friend he was on the outs with.
You could say that, the voice replied dryly. So howd you get this number, and
do you know who I am?
Snagged the number off his phone when his back was turned, along with the
contact info which only lists the name Nick. The small laugh that answered held a
note of wry approval. Heartened, I pushed on. Im not trying to be nosy, I swear. I
just hated seeing him like that, and I wanted to help, if I could. Maybe I cant. But I
had to try.
What do you know about Zak? About his past?

Not much. He makes a wooden Indian look talkative. He grew up back east, but I
dont know where. He works for a local film company, back room stuff. Hes said a
few things that lead me to think he was better off financially in the past than now,
and Ive wondered if he came by that money illegally, or at least marginally. He
keeps a very, very low profile, enough to make you think hes in hiding. And he has
several tattoos hes very secretive about, especially one on his back he wont even
let me see, and he keeps talking about getting rid of them, that one in particular.
Getting rid of the back tat Nick sputtered. Thats not Zak, he said finally. Its
just not. Listen, do you have a pen? Let me give you an address. Meet me there
tomorrow, and well talk.

2 The address was a storage facility across town. I parked beside a big black Jeep,
a sweet enough ride that I had to stop and admire it as I got out of my car.
That was Zaks. I spotted it on a used car lot and recognized it right away. A little
stalkerish, I thought, but held my peace. The man who spoke stood in the open
doorway of one unit; he was lanky with dark good looks. His hair, mustache and
beard were close cropped and neat, and he wore dark jeans and an open necked
shirt. When he took a step forward to introduce himself as Nick Groff, I noticed the
wedding ring on the left hand he extended to me, and the cane he gripped in his
right hand and leaned on to support himself. I took his hand and introduced
myself. Cmon in.
I followed him into the unit, trying to figure out where Id seen him before. It took a
moment for my eyes to shift from the bright Vegas sun to the dimness indoors, and
another moment for me to register what I was seeing. Just inside the door stood a
life-sized cardboard cutout of three men: Nick, a burly man who also looked
familiar, and front and centerZak? It cant be. The figure wore black, a tight tshirt and baggy fatigue pants, and stood with arms folded and a small, supremely
confident smile on his face. My hand was halfway to his face before I pulled it back
with an effort. The Ghost Adventures title and the words CAN YOU HANDLE THE
LOCKDOWN? were boldly printed across the bottom. It was him. Him, and you
And Aaron Goodwin. Nick nodded toward the third figure. The Ghost Adventures
Crew. We traveled all over the countryhell, all over the worldchasing evidence
of the paranormal.
Now that my eyes were fully adjusted to the change in light, I could see the small
unit was packed with boxes and equipment cases, containers for cameras and coils
of wiring. So it wasnt a show? Fiction, I mean, acting

No! Nicks dark eyes burned. Never. We explained, debunked, everything we

could; we exposed fakes when we caught them. We never lied. Not even that last
nightlies were told about that night, the night it all ended, but not by us.
My eyes were drawn back to that face, Zaks face, but not Zak as I had ever seen
him, not with that crooked and almost cocky smile. What happened? I whispered.
Nick limped across the room and sat down on a stack of boxes, propping his cane
beside him. It was almost two years ago, he began. We were doing the last
lockdown of the season, at an old boarding house in Kansas. A boarder back in the
50s killed the family who lived there, and no one had been able to move in since
without leaving in fear. We set up our gear, got ourselves locked in and went to
work. Everything was going smoothly, just another day at the office. The boarder
lived in a garret apartment and Zak wanted to spend more time there. The plan
was, Aaron & I would lock him in, give him fifteen minutes or so to make contact
and then come in. Hed been goofing on Aaron though, the way we all goofed on
each other, threatening to lock him in the root cellar where some of the bodies
were found. So Aaron wanted to get him backhe said, lets tell him the locks
jammed, or we cant find the key or something, for a minute. Not out of meanness,
Aaron never had a mean bone in his body. Just, he wanted to make Zak pee his
pants, you know?
So we did it, and Zak saw right through it. Oh well, we were busted. Only then, the
door really wouldnt open. Aaron tried, then I sent him down the stepsthere were
six or seven steps from the third floor landing up to the garret door, and it was only
wide enough for one person. I lit the space up and kept working with the key, but it
wouldnt budge, and Zak was starting to freak. I could hear it in his voice, as hard
as he tried to cover it. Guys, come on, get me outta here, please, Im getting a
really bad feeling Nicks voice failed, and he covered his lower face with his
hands for a moment. I can still hear him, calling out to us for help, he said, his
eyes bleak. And then, nothing. I yelled, but he didnt answer, and we really
panicked then.
Finally I got the lock to open, halfway expecting to find Zak passed out on the
floor inside. But as soon as the lock caught hethe door opened outward, and he
must have been right on the other side. He hit it hard, and I fell down the stairs.
Shattered this Nick lifted his right footand burst my eardrum when my head
hit. He came down the stepsI remember feeling him grab my shirt, trying to
break my fall I thought, till he slugged me. Aaron went for him, to get him off me
hes got a couple of inches and a lot of pounds on Zak, but Zak beat him down like
a rag doll, knocked him down, and kicked him.

So were lying there, bleeding, and we can hear Zak storming through the house,
and crashes and bangs, and we realize, hes trashing the equipment. Aaron tried to
get upGod, if he had just stayed down, if he hadnt thought he had to protect the
gear. He took a couple of steps, then screamed and fell. And we both lay there till
help came. Billy Tolley, a buddy of ours who did audio-visual analysis for us, was
outside in a support van. He told me later that Zak kicked out a ground floor
window and climbed out, came to the van and told them he was sick of the
paranormal bullshit and for them to go clean up their mess. Then he walked away.
If Aaron had justHe lost a couple of teeth, fractured his wrist and broke some
ribs, but when he tried to stand up a rib punctured his lung. We almost lost him. By
the time I got out of the hospital, Zaks house was on the market, his car was sold,
hed cleaned out his bank account, and dropped off the face of the earth. I didnt
track him down till a few weeks agoI gotta admit, I didnt try for the longestand
then I didnt have the nerve to call him till last night.
I realized I was holding my breath, and let it out slowly. Surely the network didnt
air that footage.
There was no footage. Zak made damn sure of that. The official story was that
Aaron and I had fallen through some rotted floorboards, and Zak went for help but
was so traumatized he couldnt go on with the show. Theyve taken good care of
us, though. I had to have several surgeries on my ankle, it was pretty fucked up;
and Aaron spent nearly a month in intensive care. When he was well enough, he
left Vegas. I want to find him, to let him know Im almost off the caneand maybe
tell him I found Zak. I dont know if hell want to know, or if I want to tell him.
Once again, I found my gaze returning to the cardboard cutout, and I searched the
photo of Zak as though it were a crime scene. What was he like, then? Before that
night?
Brave. Crazy. Driven. Kind of goofy. Fun to be with. He hated bullies, living or
dead. If any entity hurt the innocent or the weak, he was their sworn enemy. Nick
glanced at the picture, once, briefly, then looked away. He was my friend, and a
hell of a guy. Or at least I thought he was. Now I dont know if I ever even knew
him. Silence fell. I looked around the space and understood it, regretting my
earlier ill thoughts about Nick. This was no stalkers shrine, but a mausoleum, a
final resting place for his past, his dreams and memories and friendships. I bit my
lip and fought back tears. Claire? Whatwhats he like now?
Honestly? He isnt like much of anything. He really doesnt have a personality. We
live in the same apartment complex, and when I met him I thought he was the

strong, silent type, still waters run deep, et cetera. But if so, they run deeper than
Ive ever been able to plumb. I cant even imagine the Zak you describe.
For the first time since Id met him, Nick Groff smiled. He opened a nearby box,
poked through it and extracted a small package of DVDs that he held out to me.
Here, he said. Take these home and get acquainted with him. Hes well worth
your time.

+++

I took the discs home, and after supper that night I sat down to watch an episode.
Seven hours later, I surfaced, breathless and shaken. Two things were for certain.
One was that the Zak Bagans of those videosintense, passionate, quick-witted,
sometimes sillybore no resemblance whatsoever to the man I knew by that
name. The other was that, had I met that crusading, self-assured Zak two years
ago, I suspected I would have fallen quickly and helplessly in love with him.
It doesnt make sense! I complained when I met Nick at the storage unit the
following Saturday to return the discs after copying them. People dont just
change like that. Theres no switch you flip. There has to be a reason. Do you
remember Zak being really stressed out, beforebefore that night?
No more than usual. Being the team leader, he always had more on his plate than
Aaron or I did, but he managed it well, as far as I could tell. Ive gone over every
scenario I could think ofdid he have a mental breakdown, did the fear being
locked in that attic make him snap, was it our fault somehow? I dont know. I do
know Id never seen him get violent before, except for one time, very briefly,
during an investigation in Italy; we thought a demon tried to get into him, but he
fought it off. Has he been violent around you?
No was on my lips, till I thought of the shattered tv, and the fury that had turned
Zaks green eyes almost black. Only once. Hes usually so passive. It wasnt
toward me, though, directly. Hetook it out on an object.
That sounds familiar. Nick moved to some boxes stacked against one wall, and
began to pull out pulverized chunks of plastic and metal, the remains of the gear
the GAC had used on their last lockdown. The extent of the destruction was
unnerving, considering it was caused by one man bare-handed. Billy went through
them while Aaron and I were in the hospitala total loss, but I still kept em. Stupid

of me, I knowHm, this ones not in such bad shape. He lifted a small camera
from the box and inspected it, and his eyes suddenly widened. Theres a memory
card still in here. I thought Billy got them all.
Where was that camera set up? I asked. Could there be usable images on there?
And could they give us some clues as to what happened?
Nick cut his eyes at me. Us? He tried to sound tough, but he was smiling a little.
Yeah, us. I kinda have a dog in this fight too, you know.
The smile widened. I guessed itd been a good while since hed had a partner in
crime. All right, he said and slipped the memory card into his jeans pocket. Then
let us go find Billy.

3 Billy Tolley turned to be a pleasant-faced guy who rocked horn rims and a
Mohawk. His regular gig was as a club dj, and he explained to me as he set up a
starship bridges worth of audio-video equipment at his place that that was how he
and Zak had metZak had djd too, back in the day. I clapped a hand over my
mouth to stifle my half-hysterical giggles at the mental image of the Zak I knew
presiding over turntables. Not that it was all that funny, just that the deeper I
delved into this mirror-world, the crazier and more contradictory it all got.
Billy was as sharp as the spikes of his hair though, and he immediately recognized
the camera Nick held. After the ambulance took you and Aaron off, I got the local
guys who helped with setup together and we swept the house. There wasnt much
worth saving, but I took photos in every room, and labeled all the pieces with their
locations, just in case
In case charges were filed, I finished. To his surprised look I added, Vegas PD.
Granted, Im just admin support, but I still know how important chain of evidence
is.
It wasnt gonna happen. Nicks tone was flat. Besides not being able to find Zak
for a damn long time, neither of us wanted to drag things out. Better to cut our
losses and move on.
Anyway, Billy went on, I remember this little old guy cause we found it outside.
How the hell it got there, who can say; but it was lying in the front yard. There
were bits of another rig, but this ones older and tougher so it took more
punishment. The card slot doors broken, though, see? Thats how I missed the
card being inside. And besides that, if I remember right, it was getting late by then,

10

and nobody wanted to be within fifty miles of the place after dark. He took the
card from Nick and inserted it into a slot. All the other cards were useless; the
images were degraded by impact, exposure, and so on, so dont get your hopes
An image popped up on the screen. Never mind.
Aaron Goodwins broad, cheerful face filled the screen in neon green and black. I
gathered he was placing the camera in a designated spot. He fiddled with this
control and that, and finally patted it like a well-behaved puppy before he stood up.
Nick smiled sadly. So this was one of the static night-vision cameras, Billy said.
How the fuck did it get outside?
Dunno. Nick frowned at the room on screen. I cant place the exact location yet.
Let it roll and well see if we caught anythingClaire, were gonna have to run this
in real time or risk missing something. Its gonna be pretty long and tedious. Why
dont you head on home and get some rest, well let you know if
My eyes never left the screen. Shhh, I said softly and settled my bottom more
comfortably into the swivel chair. I felt rather than saw Nick shrug before he sat
down beside me and returned his attention to the playback.
After a while, the tromp of feet over the speakers announced new arrivals. Aaron
reentered the frame with a larger camera rig perched on his shoulder; then Nick
appeared, and finally Zak strode across the screen to the row of small windows to
the cameras left. I bet we get some great stuff in here, he said.
You think the guy might still be in here? the onscreen Nick queried.
Wouldnt surprise me a bit, Zak replied.
There are some other places we want to be sure we hit, Nick continued, like the
root cellar in the basement, where the bodies were found.
Right, Im thinking we need to lock Aaron down there. How strange it seemed to
me, to hear Zaks usually flat voice so playful and animated.
In your fuckin dreams, Aaron fired back. Or on second thought, go ahead. Then
when a cyclone blows you two jerkoffs to Oz, Ill be safe and sound right here in
Kansas with Toto.
Beside me, Nicks mouth suddenly fell open. Fuck me, he breathed. I remember
this conversationoh God, this camera was in the garret!
The garret? Shit. The place where everything had gone horribly wrong. If the
battered little camera had done its job, we might be about to see what had

11

happened to Zak in that room, beyond that door Nick and Aaron had been too late
in opening. Without thinking, I reached over and took Nicks hand.
The three figures onscreen left the room, led by Zak, who seemed excited beyond
words at the thought of cornering the ghost of a mass murderer. After we left that
room, Zak seemed fixated on it, Nick said. He got the idea in his head of doing
his own mini-lockdown, and two or three hours later he insisted we go do it.
Knowing now what we were seeing made all three of us sharpen our focus. Several
times I pointed out strange spots of light or shadow, but Billy or Nick always knew
the explanation; their skills at distinguishing video artifacts from true anomalies
were remarkable.
Finally voices could again be heard on the recording, and Zak stepped into view,
talking over his shoulder toward the half-open door. Yeah, fifteen minutes should
be good for starters. If I cant get a rise out of something, well try tag teaming it.
He laughed and turned, a small video camera in his hand aimed at the door as it
closed. The click of the lock sounded as loud as a gunshot in the silent room. I
wondered if it had sounded that loud to him. All right! he said, then began to
pace around the room, narrating for the camera as he went. So here I am, locked
down in the garret apartment of the Gamble house in Stull, Kansas. In 1952
Benjamin Carver boarded in this very room, until one night he killed the entire
family: Eric, his wife Sera and their two young sons. He dumped their bodies in the
root cellar, dug in the basement. Weve already gotten some amazing EVPs in
other parts of this house that indicate some of Carvers victims still haunt this
place where they died such brutal deaths. Now we want to confront their killer.
Now that he was alone on stage, so to speak, I had leisure to observe him more
closely. He wore fatigue pants and a long sleeved shirtwere those thumb holes in
the cuffs? That was a fashion statement no one would ever see in the bland
wardrobe of the Zak I knew. As he moved, too, I was struck by the odd grace, the
economy and compactness and power of his every move; again, nothing at all like
the stolid walk I was familiar with. Benjamin Carver! he yelled. Are you here?
Come out and face your accusers!
Billy pulled up a timer in the corner of the screen. Fourteen minutes and
counting.
At nine minutes in, with no response to his repeated demands, Zak fished around
in a pants pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. Unfolding it, he held it up to the
lens of his camera. This is a police photo taken of that wall he pointed the
camera toward the back wall brieflyafter Carvers arrest. No one knows exactly

12

what these bizarre markings signify, and Carver went to his grave without
divulging their secret. Lets see if we can get some answers. He tacked the paper
to the wall, stood back, and called out again. Benjamin Carver! What did these
symbols mean to you? Come on out and explain them to me. I want to know!
A faint, scratchy noise whispered through the speakers. EVP! Nick exclaimed.
I got it! Billy froze the recording and moved it back several seconds. When he
restarted it, I closed my eyes to concentrate on the sound.
explain them to me. I want to know! Zaks recorded voice insisted again, and
again the whisper came.
You dont, I said. My eyes popped open to two faces as horrified as mine must
have been. It answered him. He said he wanted to know and it said you dont.
Fuck, Billy said earnestly. Thatd be some class A evidence, if only He shook
his head and turned back to the controls.
Wait a sec, I said. Billy, can you zoom in on the paper on the wall, and print me
a copy? As he did I asked, Nick, did you guys find out beforehand what the sigils
meant? Did Zak research them?
I know I didnt, and I dont think Zak did. They were just a trigger, something to
get the spirits attention.
Idjit, I growled, and was only a little appalled to hear my uncle come out of my
mouth in the form of his favorite epithet. All those summer days spent in his big
old library of a house rubbed off more than I thought, sometimes. I looked at the
print Billy handed me. I cant ID them, but I know somebody who can.
Billy hit play. On screen, Zak stood still for a moment more, then began to sweep
the room with his camera again. Whoa, go back, Nick said after another minute
or two. Is that a shadow form, back along the wall?
Could be, Billy agreed after rewinding and rewatching. Right around the edges
of the paper there, its pretty clear theres something moving.
With a sinking feeling, I continued to watch. Several more unexceptional minutes
passed before Aarons voice sounded again. Yo, bro, you okay in there?
Yeah, Im good, Zak called back. No luck yet, though. He hadnt heard the
threatening voice, or seen the dark mist. I put the target up. Let me out and well
leave it here for a while before we come back and hit it again.

13

Um, cant do that, dude. The doors stuck. The knob gave a pro forma jiggle.
Bullshit! Zak retorted and went to the door. Open the fuckin door, Aaron.
What if I dont?
Ill kick it open! And then Ill kick your ass! But Zak was laughing as he said it,
and despite the sickness in my gut, I had to smile at the affection and camaraderie
of the partnership.
There were whispers and snickers behind the door, and more backtalk, but I
missed it, my attention abruptly pulled to the wall where the mysterious symbols
were posted. Shit, guys, look!
The shadowy mist wed seen earlier had returned in force, circling in a counterclockwise spiral around the paper. As we watched transfixed, it darkened and
expanded. Like a speeded-up film of a tumor Id seen once in school, it spread,
along the wall, and across the room
Toward the door, and toward Zak, whose attention was all on the locked door, and
who was still laughing and bantering with Nick as he began to open it. No, no,
no, The words spilled from my lips, useless as they were. Turn around, Zak. Turn
around. God, baby, please, please turn around! I already knew the ending of this
movie, and it didnt end well.
The dark fingers brushed past Zak and engulfed the door. Oh, shit, Nick gasped
beside me, even as his onscreen self was saying It wont open, Zak, for real!
Simultaneously, Zak shuddered and jumped, then spun to scan the room with his
camera; unbelievably, he was still investigating, still filming. Guys, hurry up, Im
getting a bad feeling, he said and added in a lower voice meant for the camera, I
just felt an incredible temperature drop. Somethings in here. He glanced wildly
around the room, his face a mask of fear. Cmon guys, get me out of here,
please
The picture blurred. I nearly yelled at Billywe needed to see now, we needed to
know, why was it fucking up now?before I realized it wasnt the screen, but the
tears filling my eyes.
Onscreen, the door was rattling violently as Nick struggled to reach his friend; but
the dark force was easily holding him at bay. Zak raised his camera again, lifting
his other hand beside it to steady it, and with the suddenness of a snakes strike
the darkness lunged for him. I let out a faint cry, and Nicks hand tightened on

14

mine, but I could not look away. Zak froze; his body jerked several times, then was
still for a long awful moment. The mist vanished.
He lowered the camera again, and the fear was gone from his face, replaced by a
strange look of satisfaction. Calmly, he walked over to the windows, opened one,
and tossed his camera out. He turned to sweep the room with a glance, then
approached the static night-vision gear. I flinched away, out of pure reflex, as the
figure approached. The face filled the screen as he picked the camera up, as
Aarons had when he placed it. The features were grotesque this close, bathed in
green, though the eyes were flat and white. Bye bye, he said, then was gone.
The last sound recorded was the thump of the camera hitting something, then a
grinding noise and another thump.
We sat and stared at the blank screen in stunned silence. Well, that explains how
the rig got outside, Billy said finally. The house had a tin roof over the front
porch. Zaks camera was lighter so it flew out farther and then down three stories
to the ground. But this old boy fell straight down and hit that roof, then slid down it
and just fell a few more feet, slower.
Nick roused from his near-trance. Thanks, Mr. Science. So whatever that dark
force was, where did it go after itattacked Zak? And what did it have to do with
what he did?
Billy shrugged, then set about pointing and clicking. Let me run it back to that
point and go frame by frame. It moved so damn fast, but if we run it at max slow,
could be well see more.
He slowed it till it was practically a slide show, a succession of still photos taken
fractions of a second apart. Horrified, hypnotized, we watched again as the dark
tentacles crept across the space and captured the door. Then, click by click, we
saw what the blurry split-second motion had done. One tentacle whipped around
Zaks legs just below his knees, and another around his wrists. His mouth began to
open, but darkness poured into it, silencing any attempt to call out, and yet
another tendril wound around his throat and tightened.
But then, as quickly as in the regular speed run, it was gone again. Nick swore.
Billy let the controls go back to normal. The final seconds played out as before
while they debated something. I didnt catch what exactly; my focus was still on
the screen, and Zaks face with that awful little smirk as he carried the camera to
the window to dump it. Hey Billy, can you change the night vision image to
something more normal? Or at least to black and white? Somethings off here, but I
cant tell what.

15

Sure. He ran the footage back a few seconds, and with several clicks and taps of
keyboard and mouse the screen looked a bit closer to real life. It restarted as Zak
walked away from the window toward the camera placement, and I narrowed my
eyes to watch, looking for some tiny niggling detail.
It wasnt a tiny niggling detail. In fact, it was plain as the nose on your face; or
rather, the eyes on Zaks facethe eyes that, when he crouched to pick up the
static cam, were solid pools of inky black.
I cried out and recoiled. Nick caught my shoulder before I fell out of my chair.
Claire? Whatswhat the fuck is that??
That, I said, suddenly very calm, is what I needed to see. I know what were
dealing with now, and I know where it is. Its a demon. Not sure what kind, but the
sigils probably say, and I know someone who can read them. That man Carver
summoned it, accidentally or on purpose, in 52 when he drew them on the wall. I
held up the page with a hand gone numb. And when Zak posted them again, and
called it out, it answered.
But where is it? Billy asked. Whered it go?
It was Nick who answered him, Nick who made that terrible leap with me. It didnt
go anywhere, he said. Its still in Zak.

4 We watched Zaks final minutes again, looking for any additional clues or
information. I forced my agonized heart aside and made myself study the screen
as dispassionately as my CSI buds at work would. My efforts at objectivity paid off.
At max slow, the jerking of Zaks body we had first thought to be spasms or
seizures was anything but. Look, I said and pointed. It touches him, and nothing
happens; but then it starts to constrict, and a beat later we get that movement
there--see it? Its obviously pushing against the constrictive force. I dont think
thats reflex. I think its deliberate. Zak realized something had him, and he
resisted. He couldnt do much; it was too strong, but he fought it as hard as he
could. Fresh tears clouded my vision, and I closed my burning eyes. He fought
itOh, Zak.
You gonna be okay, Claire? Billy asked quietly.
I sniffled, nodded and opened my eyes. Yeah. I have to be. Falling apart wont help
get that thing out of Zak.

16

What makes you so sure its still in there? Billy sounded unconvinced. Couldnt it
have made the mess, taken off, and left him to take the heat?
It could, but I dont think it did. What we just saw tends against that. Clearly, Zak
knew something alien was inside him. So if hours or days later it let him go, what
would he do? You knew him, Billy. Would he cut all ties with his past? Would he not
even show up at the hospital to find out if his best friends were alive or dead?
No, and hell no, respectively. Billy shook his head, his eyes haunted. I guess
its so awful to think somethings had him all this time, a part of me would rather
just think hes a deranged asshole.
I understand that, I agreed. But he never was a deranged asshole, right? A
person doesnt change that quickly. It has to be someonesomethingelse in
there, pretending to be him. You were more right than you knew, Nick, the first
time we talked, when I told you how he was behaving, and you said thats not
Zak.
Nick had been silent for a long time. I turned and found him staring at the floor.
Right on that maybe, but so wrong on everything else, he said, his voice low. All
this time, Ive blamed Zak, when it was all my fault, and Aarons. If we hadnt
punked himone lousy prank, and it cost us so much, and cost Zak everything
What the hell are you talking about? Billy said, baffled.
Nicks head came up, tears sliding down his cheeks. Zak got possessed a couple
of times, or came close anyway, but he came out of it, because he wasnt alone. I
was there, and Aaron was there, to help him pull free. But this time we werent. We
were on the other side of a locked door, laughing.
I took hold of his hunched shoulders and made him look at me. Nick, did you
watch the same footage I just did? You saw how fast that thing moved. If you and
Aaron had opened the door the moment you walked up to it, it could have stopped
you; and even if you could have gotten in, it was too late--the summoning had
already begun. It still would have gotten Zak, or maybe one of you instead. This
was not your fault. It wasnt anybodys fault, except maybe the moron who called
up this satanic son of a bitch to begin with. Zak would tell you the same. He WILL
tell you the same.
Nick was scrubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand, but he stopped cold and
frowned at me. Youyou think hes still in there?
I cant say for sure. I know how to ID demonic possession, but Im no expert.

17

I was almost possessed once, Nick said. I remember how it felt, the pressure,
the pain, the feeling zoned out and muffled, the voices yelling at me to do things I
would never... I cant even imagine what it would be like to try to live that way for
months.
I know, I know! It hurts me to think about it too. But one thing Im certain of, and
Ive learned it from what you guys have shown me and told me about Zak: hes a
fighter. He fought this demon from the instant it took hold of him. And I hopeI
praythat if theres any way possible, hes still fighting.
+++
I wanted to call Uncle Bobby right away, till I realized it was quarter past four in the
morning. Hes cranky at the best of times, and waking him up wouldnt improve his
disposition one bit, so I reluctantly conceded I had to wait a bit. Naturally, Nick and
Billy were eager to learn about my expert, but I told them nothing. I felt bad
about it, but it was force of habit; you dont go telling everybody you have a
demon hunter in the family.
My mother and her older brother had been close as kids, but grown apart over the
years. Mom said hed never been quite right after his wifes tragic death. But after
she died, when I was eight, my dad, whod divorced and remarried, thought it best
I get to know her only living relative. So every summer for the next few years, I
spent several weeks in South Dakota at my uncles junkyard. Singer Salvage was
one huge playground, and the old house piled to the rafters with books of every
type was heaven to a shy and bookish little girl.
Over those summers, Uncle Bobby taught me so much. From him, I learned to
shoot, to write my name in Japanese, to build a fire with a stick and a string and a
tube of lipstick, and to make a decent pot of pasta puttanseca. And on one
incredible night in my eleventh year, I learned that monsters were real, and that
people like my uncle devoted their lives to fighting them.
Once I had wanted to be one of those people; but hunters lived on the fringes of
society, and my uncle convinced me my mother would probably come back and
haunt us both if he allowed that. Besides, I was a lousy shot. So I had accepted my
lot, and the limited tutelage he gave; but that very knowledge had now dumped a
big steaming pile of shit in my lap, and I needed his help to deal with it.
I tossed and turned for a couple of hours, dozing and then waking in a cold sweat
from nightmares I couldnt remember. Then I paced and drank coffee for a couple
of hours more, till I decided it was a decent enough hour. As I dialed I hoped the

18

number hadnt changed; itd been six years since Id talked to him, right after I
moved to Vegas. The phone clicked. Yello?
Uncle Bobby? A wave of relief swept over me. Hi. Its Claire.
Oh. Um, hi, doll! Its been a coons age. How the, uh, how are ya?
Im okay, How are you?
Hangin in like a hair in a biscuit, darlin. Had some trouble with my legs here
awhile back, but, um, got a specialist to look at em and get em straightened out.
Great. Im sorry to bother you on a Sunday morning
Bother me? Hah. Youre never a bother, doll. I already got a coupla morons here,
theyre a bother. You remember Sam and Dean Winchester?
Oh my God! Yes! A spark of unexpected delight warmed my heart. Sam and
Deans father was a hunter, and one of Uncle Bobbys close friends. The boys had
often stayed at the salvage yard when their dad was on a hunt, and the three of us
had wreaked havoc on the place all those summers ago. Tell them hi for me.
Done. Now, is this just a social call?
Not really. If you have a few minutes, I need to pick your brain. Specifically, about
demon possession.
Uncle Bobbys tone changed instantly. What the hell have you gotten yourself
into, girl? he growled. Muffled voices in tones of concern sounded in the
background, and I heard my name. Hold on There was another click. Im
puttin you on speaker.
Hey, Claire, said a bright male voice. Its Sam.
Hi, Sam! Damn, the last time I talked to you, you were still a soprano.
Last time you talked to him, he wasnt a sasquatch yet, came a raspy and more
familiar voice. Hey, baby girl, its Dean. Been too damn long.
It sure has. Id had my first kiss, and my first in other categories we wont go into
just now, from Dean Winchester. Im sure you guys are busy, but I need some
information on demonic possession.
Why? Dean asked.

19

Why? Because I need it. And because Uncle Bobby always said educated
civilians were as important as hunters in their own way. Now, first, can a demon
possess somebody for an extended period of timemonths, a year or more?
Yes, Sam said immediately. Weve dealt with demons that kept a meatsuit for
years.
Yikes. Wheres the bodys rightful owner during all this?
Right there, usually, Dean replied. The level of their awareness varies, though.
They may be unconscious, but more likely theyre aware but helpless. Demons live
to inflict pain, and making the mortal see whats being done with their body is a
nice convenient way of doin that. Horror and hope took hold of me in a savage
tug of war.
Whats this all about, Claire? Uncle Bobby sounded frustrated.
One more question, unc. Black eyes are a pretty definite sign of demon
possession, right?
Right, and now youre gonna answer some questions! he thundered. So I did.
Quickly, I summarized my experiences with Zak, meeting Nick, and what he had
told me about the Ghost Adventures crew and their final lockdown. Sam booted up
his laptop, and I scanned the sigils and sent them to him. Its a summoning ritual,
all right, Uncle Bobby said after examining them. A lesser demon. Lesser in this
case meanin, only able to kick one mortal ass at a time, as opposed to dozens.
So this lesser demon could be using Zaks body, and holding hissoul, spirit,
essence, whateverprisoner?
Probably is, Dean confirmed. Demons that low on the food chain arent the
brightest bulbs on the sign, but theyre great opportunists. Cunning, sadistic
bastards, by and large. There was a knowing tone to his voice. I didnt want to ask
where that came from.
Could hisitscontrol vary? Because sometimes he seems really cold, and
sometimes, apologetic, pitiful almost.
It may be beatin your boy down, and lettin him closer to the surface, a little, on
occasion, if it needs knowledge he has, but only when hes weakened enough not
to cause it trouble.
Fits the general demonic MO, Sam agreed. And too, if Zak has feelings for you,
the demon is probably using you against him; threatening you to keep him in line.

20

I doubt that, I said. Zak didnt know me before, remember. So what do I do

about this?
My uncles answer stunned me. Do? You get the hell outta Dodge, thats what you
do. Break your lease, quit your job, whatever. Youre a smart girl, you can find work
easy. Go back east, maybe. And dont let that thing see you or talk to you again.
What? You just told me an innocent mans soul is being tortured, and you expect
me to pack up and run?
Damn right I do. Youre not a hunter, and right now we cant spare any hunters.
We could Sam began.
Sam, we got too much on our plates, Dean interrupted.
Leave Vegas, Claire, Uncle Bobby ordered. Demons arent for playing with.
Anger burned through my shock and chilled my skin when it hit. Oh, I know that,
I said quietly. Thanks for the information. Sorry to have bothered you.
I hung up and nearly threw the phone across my living room; but that smacked too
much of the outburst at Zaks apartment. Instead I tossed it down onto the couch
and dropped beside it, before the emotions penned up inside me burst loose. I
curled up in a ball and cried till, exhausted, I drifted into an uneasy doze
::I stand in a huge building, empty and dank and grey. I think its an old prison
from Nicks DVDs, one of the places the Ghost Adventures Crew investigated. After
a moment, I hear a noise, grating and metallic, like the closing of a rusty cell door;
but it goes on and on, and I realize its a voice, though no human voice Ive ever
heard. Shaky but curious, I follow it, moving as quietly as I can, up stairs and down
catwalks, till I locate it down one corridor. Flat to the wall, I creep down to a cell
where two figures can be seen, both of them familiar but so different. One stands
with back to me, the harsh voice coming from it, and a long sharp knife shining in
its hand. The other is chained to the wall, barely standing, and hangs limp and
bloodied::
I woke with a cry, to the phones bleat. Uncle Bobby, no doubt, calling to harangue
me some more. Aint tryin to hear that, I thought, still shaking from the
nightmarish vision of Zak bound and helpless, tormented by a monster that wore
his face. I went to the bathroom and washed the tears from my face.

21

The phone was still complaining when I returned, and I sighed and checked it. One
call was from my uncle, all right, but an email had just come through from Sam
Winchesters address. <Claireplease replyI think I can help. Hows your Latin?>
I gaped for a moment before typing an answer. <Latins fair for not being used
much. Whats your thought?>
In a few moments, a reply came. <Deans right, weve got a lot going on now. But
every demon banished is one less dirtying up the earth. And I know you, Claire; all
those baby birds and animals youd try to save when we were kids? I doubt youve
changed all that much. Besides, youre dating this guy, even if its not exactly this
guy. Youre not gonna leave him hanging, and Id rather you at least know what
youre doing. I can teach you the exorcism, but you have to take it seriously. Do
nothing until I say youre ready, and tell no one.> I almost started to cry again.
<Deal?>
<DEAL> I replied instantly.

5 Sam asked for the video from the Kansas lockdown, so I texted Billy. <HeyI
talked to my experts & they need 2 see the lockdown footage b4 deciding how to
proceed. Could u send it 2 me, or better yet upload it & send me a link? They say it
is def a demon, its prob still in Zak, and it has Zak in there w/it. Will let u know
when I know more. Thx.>
I sent the same information to Nick, and then went about my Sunday feeling both
grave and hopeful. If there was a way to break those walls and bring Zak out of
that prison, I was damn well going to find it. I got online and started researching,
and didnt come up for air till my phone beeped again. I grabbed it, hoping it was
Sam.
It wasnt. It was Zak. Or, rather, it was a text sent from Zaks phone, by the thing
that had stolen his body and his life. <ClaireIve been trying to reach you for
over a week now. I miss you terribly, but there are many more fish in the sea. If
you arent interested in continuing our relationship, let me know. Dont leave me in
limbo.>
Limbo, ha, I thought. Dont worry. The only place I want to see you in is Hell, you
piece of shit. From what Id learned about Zak, if he had sent a text in a similar
situation, it probably would have gone more like <ClaireWTF? Call me!> Or
maybe <ClaireWTF? Ok, Im sorry. Call me!>

22

A week ago, I would have deleted the text without a thought. I had in fact deleted
every other message heithad sent. An hour ago, despondent, I might have
replied <I know what u r> and let the chips fall where they might. But nowit was
important to keep a safe distance, true, but equally important to keep an open
connection, so as not to arouse its suspicions when I was ready to go after it. So I
replied <I dont mean 2 do that. I still care about u. just give me a lil time 2 get
myself 2gether, plz?>
<I will> came the swift response, <but dont expect me to wait forever.>
<I wont. I promise. Thanx.> I hit Send with satisfaction. The fish was on the hook;
now to keep it there while I learned how to land it.
Thus began my double life. By day I filed and sorted and helped with lab tests and
occasionally got pulled into the CSI office to add some extra brain cells to a thorny
case. By night, I learned to cast out demons. Sam was a thorough, patient teacher,
who explained not only what to do but why. He emailed me the complete ritual of
exorcism, recipes for holy water, and drawings he swore would snare the demon
and its meatsuit or possessed body like flypaper. Every couple of days I sent a
text to Zaks phone, something in the thanks for your patience, Im working
through my issues vein, just enough to keep myself a viable option in the demons
eyes.
I rehearsed every gesture, and practiced the Latin words till they rolled off my
tongue as the few my uncle had taught me long ago once had. Sam insisted the
pronunciation had to be note-perfect, so I borrowed the battered little camera from
the GACs last lockdown and filmed myself, then sent the video to Sam for his
review. I told Nick my experts wanted to use it for evidence gathering during the
exorcism. I did not, however, tell him I intended to do the exorcising; he struck me
as the kind of guy who would be no happier than my uncle at that prospect.
Weirdly, the longer I studied, and the deeper I delved into the realm of
demonology, the more, and more vividly, I dreamt of the grey prison. The dreams
were always lucid, and became so clear that I started to wonder if they were mere
dreams at all. Nick had said once that Zak, despite his protests to the contrary,
was exceptionally sensitive to spiritual energies. If my studies had opened me up
to those energies as well, could I be touching Zaks awareness, seeing his world as
he saw it? That thought left me torn: I desperately wanted to make contact, to let
Zak know help was on the way, but that might alert his captor too. I couldnt risk it
knowing I was on to its sick game. So, I stayed in the shadowsuntil one terrifying
and glorious night when all that changed.

23

::I hide outside the cell, chilled by the demons guttural chuckles, and bite back
screams of grief and fury at every low cry of pain that I hear. Zak is still resisting,
with everything in him, but hes weakening, I can tell. How much longer can he
hold on, before he breaks and loses himself? Fear takes hold of me and moves me
up to the cells barred door. The demon admires its handiwork, licking blood off the
blade. Zaks motionless except for an occasional twitch; the shackles binding his
wrists to the wall are all thats holding him upright. Theres a chain wrapped
around his neck, reminding me of nothing so much as a dogs choke collar. His
head hangs low, his dark hair matted with sweat and blood. Look up, I think. See
me. If you think youre hallucinating, if IT thinks you are, thats okay. Maybe even a
hallucination could give you enough hope to hang on.
As if he hears me, his head rises, so painfully slowly. His eyes are unfocused and
dazed, but when they meet mine theres still a spark of life there, and they
sharpen. I put a finger to my lips; his gaze flicks away, then up toward the ceiling,
as if in appeal or thanks to the heavens. The demon starts to say something
taunting, but Zak cuts him short with a hoarse but fervent Fuck you.::
I woke with tears in my eyes, as I always did from those dreams, but this time the
anguish was tempered by a hint of hope, a spark like the spark in Zaks eyes. And
pride too, as silly as that may sound. Damn, hes strong! And smart. He
understood immediately that he had to hide my presence. Hold on, baby, hold on,
just a little longer
That was Thursday morning, and that night, Sam declared I was ready. <Your Latin
sounds almost as good as Bobbys, and your deliverys strong, nothing timid about
it. Thats vital: show no fear when youre facing a demon, ever. I think I told you
that already, didnt I?>
<Yes, several times, along with pages of other useful tidbits> I typed back. We met
in a private chat room, using it as our personal classroom and workshop.
<:-p> Sam replied. <Good thing youre such a fast learner. Deans starting to get
suspicious. I always spend time online doing research, but lately my log times
been unusually high, even for me. I couldnt expect him not to notice forever.>
<I remember how much you loved to go thru Uncle Bobbys books.>
<Still do. Nothing like a good old book. Weve really gotta get together like that
again, sometime soon. Translated, dont screw this up and get yourself killed. Your
buddys counting on you.>

24

<You dont have to remind me.> Id told Sam about the dreams, and he agreed
there might be truth in them, a visual manifestation of a mental reality.
<So, you know what to do> Sam finished. <Go do it, and let me know when its
over. Lure that demon in, Claire, and then kick it in the ass.>
+++
I gathered my gear in a green cloth grocery bag and set it by my bedroom door.
Then every hour or two for the rest of the night I sat down in the floor, dumped it
all out and went through it and repacked it. By this time tomorrow, my double life
would be over, one way or another.
On Friday I worked through lunch so I could leave early. I did make time to eat
though, one thing Sam had insisted on; no getting light-headed at an inopportune
moment. I also texted Nick. <Its on. As soon as I know something Ill let you
know.>
Then I took a deep breath, and dialed Zaks cell number. Zak Bagans here.
Bullshit, I snarled mentally. Hi, its Claire.
Claire! The demon sounded thoroughly delighted. I was starting to think youd
left town.
Damn, is it reading my mind now? Oh, please. You mean too much to me for me
to do that. True enough, if not in the way my foe would probably take it. Im so
sorry for the way I acted the other night.
No need to apologize, dear. The faults as much mine. Just because I have a, well,
irrational dislike of all that supernatural nonsense, gave me no right to blow up at
you.
Its okay, I understand. I miss you so much! Lets get together tonight. Are you
free? Well see how much trouble we can get into.
Now, Claire, the demon scolded, you know going out isnt my thing.
Who said anything about going out? We can stir up all manner of trouble and
never leave your apartment. I closed my eyes for an instant and sent up a quick
prayer. In fact, how about thistonight, Im yours. I want to make up to you for
being such a bitch. Anything you want to do tonight is fair game.
That got its attention, as Id hoped. Anything?

25

Within reason.
Define within reason.
Um, anything that doesnt endanger life, limb, property or sanity?
Mmm. So what if, for example, I wanted to tie you to my bed and torment you for
a while?
Somehow, I turned a nauseated choke into a semblance of a flirtatious giggle of
mock outrage. Why, Mr. Button-down, I had no idea you had a pervy side. Good
thing its Friday night; we have the whole weekend ahead of us.
Yes, yes, we do, it said in a tone that left no doubt in my mind what it wanted to
do with me tied to a bed for a weekend.
Okay, the hook was in. Time now to start reeling the fish in. In fact, I still have my
keywhat if I slip out of work a bit early and go on to your place? I can arrange
some things, and wait for you--appropriately dressed.
Or not dressed at all, it growled.
Oh hell no, I was not performing an exorcism buck naked. No way! You keep the
air conditioner too cold. You mean a lot to me, but not enough for me to catch
pneumonia. Besides, wouldnt unwrapping the package be more fun?
It hesitated, and I hoped I hadnt come on too strong. Good point. You know the
rules, though. No meddling in my things.
I never meddle in your things! I protested. See you later, then. I cant wait for
tonight. I hung up. Well, that was unexpectedNo, it wasnt. I knew it reveled in
power and control, and I had just managed to push all its buttons. The demon
would hit that door this evening ready to play, and hopefully never even dream it
was walking into my trap.
The afternoon flew by, and before I knew it I was on the way back to the complex. I
parked in front of the stairs to Zaks apartment and got out, looking across the lot
at my own windows. For a moment I was seized with a desire to run, to go and hole
up there and throw this bag I carried in the dumpster. What did I think I was doing,
taking on a demon? Assuming it really was a demon, and not just a deeply
disturbed man. I stood still, breathed and closed my eyes fighting for calm.
Unbidden, Zaks face rose before me as I had seen it in my dream, bruised and
beaten but undefeated. My gut and my heart said this was true. I would not run.

26

I ran upstairs and slipped into the apartment. First I checked the whole placeno
unexpected lurkers. Then I set up the bedroom. I pulled the covers down off the
end of the bed, tossed the pillows in the corner, and dragged the bedside table to
the far wall. Sams instructions had been clear: get anything that could be used as
a weapon out of arms reach. Not just to protect yourself, but to protect your Zak
too. Weve had demons mortally wound their meatsuits in order to keep us from
exorcising them. Of course, we had to do it anyway, but then we were left with a
dying human to try and save.
From my bag I took several sheets of paper. Each bore a drawing of a circle
inscribed with glyphs and runes. They were called devils traps, and Sam said they
would both provide final confirmation of the demons presence in Zaks body, and
immobilize it while I performed the ritual of exorcism. I put one under the bed, a
second between the mattress and springs, and slid a third under the fitted sheet.
Sam hadnt said multiples had a cumulative effect, but you couldnt be too careful.
On the bureau against the far wall, I set the little video camera, and checked to be
sure it could see both the bed and the spot near the window where I intended to
stand. Documentary evidence would be good to havealthough if things didnt go
well, nobody would ever see it. I refused to think about that. Show no fear.
I went into the bathroom. The mirror had been replaced, but when I took off my
shoes I stepped on a tiny sliver of glass stuck in a crease in the tile floor. I
wondered as I changed how it had been broken. Quickly, I slid out of my work
clothes and into a pair of pink silk shortie pajamas, sexy enough to keep my preys
attention, comfortable enough to move swiftly in. Around my neck, I hung a clay
pendant on a thong. Id made it from a pattern Sam had sent, and it was meant to
protect me from any attempt by the demon to attack or possess me once it was
expelled from its current squat. It was really rather striking in design, a pentacle
set inside a sunburst, and I admired it for a moment before tucking it between my
breasts.
A second identical necklace was nestled in my bag, for Zak to wear once he was
free. I stopped and smiled briefly to myself in the mirror at that thought. What was
it going to be like, getting to know someone I had thought I knew, but didnt; but
kind of did, through video, and the words of his friends, and who I thought I might
be halfway in love with, even though wed never actually met except in a dream
Oh stop, youll give yourself a headache. He may not even know who you are!
Cross that bridge when you get there. Focus on the damn demon.
Back in the bedroom, I checked my bag one last time. The printout of the exorcism
ritual lay on topno trying to wing it by memoryalong with an old Windex bottle

27

scrubbed clean and filled with holy water, homemade from Sams recipe. I set it
beside the window and went out to the living room. Id done all I could do; nothing
left now but to wait.
The waiting part didnt last long, as it turned out. Only a few minutes after I
perched on the couch arm facing the door, it burst open. The demon stalked in,
ripping off its tie as if ready to bind me with it right there. Its eyes glittered, with
the coldness of a snakes regard. I came to my feet.
Time to kick it in the ass.

6 The hardest thing I believe Ive ever done was to stand still, with that monster
coming toward me with the necktie taut between its fists like an assassins garotte
and then waggle my eyebrows and say Ooh! Maybe I shouldnt run too fast.
I spun and dashed down the short hallway to the bedroom, with the demon in hot
pursuit. The timing had to be perfectThe foot of the bed faced the door, and just
inside I jumped, landed on the bed and twisted around just in time to see my
pursuer closing in. As it pounced, I rolled to my side and off, coming to my feet as
the demon hit the mattress full length. The end of the tie hung off the edge of the
mattress, and while its would-be wielder was regrouping I grabbed it and jerked it
looseone less weapon in its arsenal. I draped it around my neck, giggled like I
was having the time of my life, and took a side step as though about to run again.
With an animal growl, the demon came to all fours and turned to come off the
other side and cut me offand stopped cold. It growled again and slapped at the
mattress, but it was stuck. It couldnt move off that bed. I had time to think yay, it
worked! followed by oh fuck, this is real before I dove for my gear. The face it
turned to me, contorted with inhuman fury and with black holes for eyes, only
confirmed what the devils traps had proven. Surprise, asshole, I said and stood
with the printout in one hand and the spray bottle of holy water in the other.
The demon still seemed unsure what was happening, until I began to read the Latin
words. Then it howled, crawled to the foot of the bed, and slashed the air with
claw-like fingers trying to grab me; but even Zaks small bedroom was big enough
for me to stay clear. The room was, however, small enough for me to easily fire
several spurts of holy water into its face. It yelped and fell back, scrubbing
frantically at its eyes. I hoped Zak wasnt hurt by the water, and hoped more that I
would get a chance to apologize to him for it.

28

Realizing it couldnt reach me physically, the demon sat back with a thump and
attacked verbally, trying to break my concentration. Dividing my attention was a
real challenge; I had to keep track of it, but at the same time filter it out as much
as I could. Another of Sams training dictums rose to mind: Dont listen to it, and
whatever you do, DONT answer it. No matter what it says, its a lie, every word. It
wants you to play its game. Stick with yours!
The flow of the Latin helped. The words were beautiful, and I knew the meanings,
so I could put the emphasis where it belonged and hurl them like missiles of
righteous anger. I let it wash over me and block the hateful semi-voice of the
demon.
you pathetic little geek bitch, playing at being a huntress
Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus--
couldnt be a hunter, couldnt be a cop, youre even a bad lay
Ergo draco maledicte, et omnis legio diabolica
you think youre gonna get your faggy buddy back? Hes lost his mind. Hes in
here suckin on his toes
cessa decipere humanas creaturas!!
It raised hooked fingers to face, and terrified it was about to try and claw at Zaks
eyes, I darted close and hosed it down with another blast of holy water. It
screeched, screwed its eyes shut and began to jerk as though having a convulsion.
I gasped in sudden hope; it didnt know Id seen this before, but I had, in the
Kansas lockdown video, and I knew what it meant. Zak! I yelled. Youre in there
fighting, arent you? I know you are! Can you hear me?
The next groan seemed to change timbre midway through, from harsh and guttural
to something morehuman. The body on the bed sucked in a great shuddery gulp
of air, as though surfacing after a near drowning, and the eyes flew open and
locked with mine. They were no longer black, but green, and such a greenawake,
alert, alive, and snapping with fire: a little scared, and a lot angry. I knew those
eyes, even though I had never looked into them in the waking world.
Claire! Zak gasped, and his strained voice was as beautiful as an angels.
Yes! I pumped my fist, squirt bottle and all; but my heart panged when he
reached out toward me. I cant touch you, baby, not till we finish this. Stay with it!
It cant beat both of us together. Keep fighting it!

29

His outstretched hand clenched into a fist. Yeah, he panted, and his focus turned
back inward. His body began to shake again, and through his teeth he gritted out,
Getthe fuckOUTof me!!
As the inner battle continued, I tore back into the exorcism. For a few moments it
seemed a stalemate reigned, until a horrible gurgling noise rose from the
contested throat. I faltered, frightened the demon had found a new way to attack
Zak, but then steeled myself and pushed on.
Deus caeli, Deus terrae, humiliter majestati gloriae Tuae supplicamus--
Abruptly, Zaks head flung back, and a solid column of purple-black smoke began
to pour from his mouth. My heart jumped, but I kept reading.
--ut ab omni infernalium spirituum potestate, laqueo, deceptione et nequitia,
omnis fallaciae, libera nos, Domine
Removing the demon from its unwilling host was only half the battle; the rest of
the rite would banish it back to Hell. It knew that as well as I did, and it flew at me,
battering me with a stinking wind, picking up objects to hurl at me. The talisman
around my neck warmed in response, protecting me from possession. Id
memorized the end of the ritual by Sams direction for just such a situation, in case
the pages were torn from my grasp, but I held on tight. I had to finish before it
decided to try and take Zak again.
Vade, Satana, inventor et magister omnis fallaciae, hostis humanae salutis.
Humiliare sub potenti manu dei, contremisce et effuge!!
Like a spike struck by a hammer, the black pillar slammed into the floor. With a
sizzle and a burning stench, it was gone. I bent over and rested my fists, still
clutching my weaponry, on my thighs while I chased my breath. Eyeing the scorch
marks on the carpet I thought Man, I hope nobody was downstairs. The demon
could possess no one there, though; completing the rite punched its one-way ticket
to Hell, a place, according to Sam, even demons didnt like. I didnt ask how he
knew that.
Finally I felt able to stand. Zak had crumpled back onto the mattress, and now lay
on his side facing away from me. Thankfully, his breathing looked regular.
Everything in me screamed to run to him, but I couldnt yet. Sam had warned of
possible secondary possessions, weaker inimical entities that attached themselves
to demons and could be left behind after an exorcism. There were ways to detect
them, and those were the tools I had to implement now. Zak? I called. Zak?

30

Mmmnfph. The answering grunt sounded so normal I had to swallow a laugh.

Wonder if he sounds like that first thing in the morning. Wonder if hes a night owl
or an early bird. So many things I didnt know about him! I prayed that now I would
have the luxury of finding out some of them.
Hey, Zak. Howre you feeling?
Another grunt replied, and finally he mumbled as though half asleep, Feel like I
went six rounds of MMA.
MMA? Oh right, Nick said once Zak was into mixed martial arts. Cmere a minute.
This time the answer left me torn between jumping for joy and running to hide. It
was a low, throaty chuckle, just a bit lewd. Mmmm, how bout you cmere?
Does he not remember? But he knew me, just a minute ago; he called my name.
Has he forgotten? Suddenly half sick at heart, I managed to say, Cmon, Zak,
seriously, just come over here, please.
Okay, okay, he grumbled. Damn, why am I so sore? He rolled off the far side of
the bed and stood, with a long, languid stretch, and the same grace Id seen on the
videos. I relaxed a bit; if any demonic being had been hiding inside him, the devils
traps would have held him. I had the craziest fuckin dream, I was Halfway
through turning toward me, he halted, then finished more slowly, looking down at
his dress work clothes. The bewildered look on his face was not improved when he
looked up at me. I knew I must be one hot mess, in my sooty, sweaty sex jammies,
clutching a wrinkled sheaf of paper and an old squirt bottle. Clairewhat the fuck
just happened?
I opened my mouth, and the world began to tilt and slowly spin. I dropped the
exorcism and dug my fingers into the window facing, sagging against the wall to
keep from falling headlong. Before a roar blotted out all sound, I thought I heard
Zak cry out my name. For a moment, or a few, I lost track of everything, and
roused to find my feet off the ground and my bottom coming to rest on something
soft, accompanied by frantic mumbles. Pillow, wheres the fuckinpillow, there is
it My head rose then settled back. Claire, Claire! Shit, sweetie, dont do this to
me. I made a feeble noise of protest as my fingers were loosened from their death
grip on the Windex bottle. No, no, I need that, Sam said squirt him with it to be
sureWhat the hells in this anyway? A faint squich, squich, snif sounded.
Rosewater? Okay, whatever. Claire! Come on, sweetheart, wake up Cool damp
fingers swiped my cheeks, and I coaxed my eyes into opening. Zaks worried face
hovered about me where I lay on the bed, and a little grin of relief tugged at his
cheeks. Hey, there you are.

31

Yeah, I whispered. God, what a beautiful smile you haveIve never seen you
smile. Youitnever did.
The grin faded. It wasnt a dream, was it. The words were not spoken as a
question. The demon, thethe possession.
No, it wasnt a dream. His hand still rested against my face, and I covered it with
mine. But its over now. Youre free. This proves it, if it came out of that bottle.
The spray bottle lay on the mattress beside his other hand. I tipped my head
toward his damp fingers. Its holy water. Your body couldnt tolerate its touch if
anything demonic were still in there.
It burned before. Not unbearably, to me; more like shampoo in my eyes. But to
to itthe stuff was like acid. Now it just smells like rosewater.
Really? I turned my head and sniffed his palm. I dont smell anything.
Zak followed suit. I dont either, now. Weird. I pushed myself up to sitslowly; I
was still a little woozyand watched him process. How long? he asked finally.
Almost two years, Nick says.
Two years He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes. It took everything
from me. My house, my car, my dogmy lifes work, my friendseverything I
valued. Everything. I hurt for him, but a selfish little corner of me was a bit hurt I
didnt seem to rate any mention. That lasted only until his eyes popped open.
Except you, he said and pulled me into a fierce embrace. It didnt get you. I
wouldnt let it have you. But it got so closeit knew, at the end. When you said
youd do anything it wanted, I couldntcouldnt hide the truth any more. It knew.
And it was gonna hurt you, and make me watchoh fuck, the things it said it was
gonna do to you His grip tightened, and he shuddered violently. I wrapped my
arms around him, and rubbed little circles on his sweat-wet back. Thats why I was
up front, where I could jump itit had to show off how sadistically creative it was.
It didnt happen, Zak, I soothed him. We stopped it. You stopped it. I drew back
just far enough to look at his face. The shine of tears in his eyes cut my heart; I
ached to kiss them away, but couldnt be that forward with a man to whom I must
certainly be half a stranger still. You said you were hiding truth from the demon.
About what?
He blinked the tears away. I told you, he said simply. It took everything I loved
away from me. The only way I could keep you safe was to not let it know that I
loved you. I guess I looked as stunned as I felt. Okay, so maybe it sounds crazy

32

to say I love you, but I do, all right? Ive seen you, Ive watched you. Youre smart
and compassionate and gorgeous, and you took on fuckin HELL for me. How could
I not love you? Yeah, I know I cant expect anything back for now, because you
dont know me at all
Yes, I do, I interrupted him. I know you. Through videos, and through your
friends, and---other stuffI know you. I know youre sharp, and strong, and hot,
and crazy brave. And yeah, I believe I love you. But, Zak, dont mistake gratitude
or guilt for love. Dont you tell me you love me unless you mmfph
He interrupted me right back, with a kiss that scorched my eyelashes and curled
my toes. Did that feel like guilt? he demanded when we parted. Did that taste
like gratitude?
Um, no, I conceded, trying to make my eyes stop crossing.
Good, he grumbled. Just so we understand each other. Im no saint, Claire. Im
stubborn, and I leap without looking, and Ive been called an asshole a few times.
Well, more than a few. But mostly, thats because I dont like being told what to do,
or what to think. So. Dont tell me I dont love you. Okay?
Okay. How bad was it that listening to him enumerate his bad qualities made
tears of joy that much harder to hold back? You should know, Im no angel either.
More like an Amazon, he retorted. Damn, girl. Any other womanfuck, any
other personwould never have walked back in here if they knew what was in me.
You obviously knew, and you came prepared. How did you know, sweetie, how?

7 I guess it started the day Nick called you a few weeks ago, I began. How
much did you know of what was going on, in the world?
Enough, Zak said. Sometimes the demon kept me in the dark, but a lot of times
like I said, it seemed to want to show off, so itd put me where I could see and
hear but couldnt do anything. It felt like--none of it was material, of course, but
your brain has to have something concrete to hold onto, I guess, so it felt like I was
in a glass coffin. I screamed and banged on it till my hands were bloody. And once I
was too worn out to fight anymore, it would let me out, especially if it had to
interact with anybody Id known before. That was its way to keep its cover, I think.
I couldnt get too far, it kept me on a real short leash, and if I tried to say or do
anything itwell, choked me till I blacked out, and woke up back in the dark.
What was the dark like? I asked, half afraid of the answer.

33

Zak gave a small laugh. Its funny, in a sick way, but I saw it as a place we did a
lockdown once, the old Ohio State Reformatory. Its a
Cold, gray, decaying place, I burst out. I dreamed about it. I dreamed about you
there, chained in a cell
Shock flitted across his face. I saw you, he breathed. I thought Id finally gone
mad. HowAre you psychic? Cause I love you, sweetie, but Im not sure how I feel
about you reading my mind.
Dont worry. I clasped his hands in mine. Im not any kind of psychic. Nick said
youre really sensitive to energies though, and I think I was just so focused on
wishing I could let you know you werent alone, that we connected.
Zak relaxed and smiled that crooked half-smile I was quickly coming to love.
Anyway, when Nick called it shoved me out there to talk to him. It kept
whispering in my ear, likereminding me this was all my fault. It always said that;
that if I hadnt opened the door, it couldnt have gotten in. And if I said anything it
would track Nick down and He shuddered. How is he? I explained about Nicks
ankle. He winced. And Aaron?
I shook my head. You know he moved away. Nicks been trying to find him, but no
luck yet. He broke some ribs in that lockdown, and one punctured a lung. It was
touch and go for a while, apparently, but Nick says when he last saw Aaron, he was
fine.
For a long moment, Zak was silent, his face still. They must fuckin hate me, he
said finally.
I cant say anything for Aaron, but as for Nick, when I first met him he was more
confused, and sad, than anything. Trying to figure out what went wrong, what
made you snap, whether it was his doing somehow. Then once we put together
what had happened, hate was the last thing he felt for you.
Okay, but howd you find him? And howd you know what happened to me?
Stole his number off your phone and called him. That made him chuckle. As we
talked, we realized we couldnt be talking about the same person. Then he found a
camera that had survived the lockdown--he has a storage unit with all your old
gear in it-- with its memory intact. We took it to your friend Billy
Billy! Hes doing okay?

34

Yeah, fine. The three of us went over the footageit was that upstairs room you
were locked down in. So we saw everything. I knew after that youd been
possessed, and I was pretty sure it was holding you prisoner.
Everything? You mean we have evidence? Zaks eyes glittered with excitement
as I described the footage. Only he could be that thrilled about video showing the
start of his own nightmare.
It caught the whole time you were in that room, including the sigils you posted on
the wall, the ones from the mass murder case? Reluctantly I let go of his hands
long enough to grab my bag and bring it over to the bed. The talk of the footage
reminded me that the little old camera was still busily filming on the bureau; I
made a mental note as I reseated myself to get it after we finished comparing
notes. If video of the possession excited Zak, video of the exorcism should make
him turn back flips. Theyre a summoning for a lesser demon. When you put them
back up you activated the ritual. Whether the same demon responsible for the
deaths in the 50s answered or not, who can say, but I trailed off as the light in
Zaks eyes failed and his shoulders slumped. Zak? Are you all right?
He stared at the paper I held. So the damned demon was right about one thing,
then, he said, all animation gone from his voice. It really was my fault. If I had
researched, or gotten somebody else to, if I hadnt been so fuckin gung ho to use
them as a trigger, none of this wouldve happened.
I groaned loudly. No wonder you and Nick are so tightyoure entirely too much
alike in some ways. Let me rewind the same talk I gave him. I took Zaks hands in
mine again, and shook them for emphasis. The police had these markings on file
for what, sixty years, and couldnt identify them? Trust me, only a trained demon
hunter would know exactly what they were and what they could do, and you,
darlin, did not have access to one. Solook at me, Zak I really shouldnt have
said that, because his eyes connecting with mine didnt help my focus any. In
actuality, they didnt do anything but turn my innards to girl goo. Nonetheless, I
soldiered on. Repeat after me: NOT MY FAULT.
Not my fault, he said softly, after a long moment.
Oh, for cryin out loud. Say it like you mean it. Say it like you believe it! I do! Its
not your fuckin fault!
Its not my fuckin fault! This time the words came more easily. Zak sat up
straighter, and the half-smile crept back. Its not, is it? But howd you know what
the symbols meant, then?

35

Damn, it was time to come clean. I briefly explained about my uncle, and the old
friend who had taught me the exorcism. Zak gaped. Youd never done that before?
Shit, woman!
Yeah. Sorry to use you as a practice case. I squeezed his hands, and looked away.
If Id known more, I might have recognized the signs of possession sooner, instead
of just thinking Im good at picking lousy boyfriends. My throat closed. All these
months I left you suffering, all aloneIm sorry, Zak, Im so sorry
When the tears broke through, Zak pulled me into his arms. Oh damn, sweetheart,
dont. Im no good dealing with female stuff. It makes me all nervous and shit. He
held me close with one arm while he slid out of his dress shirt. I hate these damn
things, he growled, and used it to dry my eyes. Your turn. Repeat after me: NOT
MY FAULT. Or, if you prefer the R-rated version like I do, not my FUCKIN fault.
How could he make me laugh even when my heart was aching? Not my fuckin
fault, I repeated obediently and managed a smile.
Damn right its not, he said with feeling and drew me back into his embrace.
Under the shirt he wore a tank undershirt, and I rested my wet cheek against his
bare shoulder for the first time with wonderful contentment. Then I noticed
something Id never seen before. Hey! Your tattoos. The demon kept them
covered all the time. Lets see em. I slid off his shoulder and turned my head to
admire the big Celtic cross there.
That ones part of our old GAC logo, Zak explained. And this one he showed a
smaller one on his right wristwas during my Dracula period.
And the big one on the back? I only know its there from this. I touched two tiny
dark lines at the nape of his neck, and he almost squeaked. I filed that info away
for future reference.
That one should have been a reminder to me to be more careful. Zak peeled off
the undershirt. I scooted around and gasped at the half angel, half devil on his
upper back. I got attacked in Italy on an investigation. I felt like I was being pulled
two ways, so the tat was for that. As it turns out, actual demon possession didnt
feel so much like that, as it did being kidnapped and beaten into submission.
His matter-of-fact tone gave all the more emphasis to the things he wasnt saying;
the terrible things, I suspected, he hoped I had not seen in my dreams. I wrapped
my arms around him from behind. Dont be afraid, I whispered into his ear. Its
never gonna happen again. I wont let it. His soft chuckle rumbled through my

36

body, pressed against his. Heres one thing to prove it. I pulled back, took off my
talisman and hung it around his neck, then slid back to face him and explained its
meaning while digging through my bag for the other and putting it on. Sam sent
me the design and I made them.
Nice. Zak admired it. Itd make a cool tat. Maybe my other shoulder. Then he
gave me a little glare. So, what else did this Sam give you?
What, are you jealous? I snickered. Sams great. Hes like a brainy little brother.
I hope you get to meet him and his brother sometime. Youd like them. I
clambered off the bed to retrieve the devils traps and show him.
You had all the bases covered, he marveled. Makes me feel like a fifth wheel.
When you started the chant you distracted it, and it couldnt hold me down like it
usually did; I could break through, but I dont know that I was much help.
Oh yes, you were. Uncle Bobby said it could only handle one foe at a time, so two
was too much for it. Made things much easier. And for mejust knowing you were
there fighting it, and knowing that you knew I was hereI wasnt going to give up
till you were free.
Thank God. Its good to know I helped, though. Im not cut out to be the damsel in
distress. But you do make an amazing knight inpink satin? That cant be standard
uniform for exorcisms.
I had to do something to keep its attention. Making it think it was going to get
seriously laid worked. Although, you know how everybody talks like demons are so
great in bed? Lies! Ive nearly worn out a vibrator having to go home and take care
of business myself after it got its rocks off I caught myself. Oh gosh, Zak, Im
sorry, TMI.
He looked quietly appalled. I feel like I should apologize for the misuse of my
parts, he said.
No more your fault than somebody stealing your car and having a wreck.
Doesnt matter. This is an affront to my male ego, and Its gonna take a lot of
work to correct it. He put his hands on my hips. Id like to start working on that
right now, if youre available.
I caught my breath. Totally available, I returned.

37

8 My stomach growled.
I was mortified. Here I was basking in the afterglow of the best damn sex I had
ever had, and my stomach had the audacity to growl. Worse yet, Zaks growled
then too as though in reply. Considering his bare belly was scant inches from mine,
it might well have been.
We ought to get some supper, I sighed.
Mmm-hmm. His voice was muffled, since his face was currently buried in my
breasts.
A few minutes later, I pointed out, Youre not moving.
Neither are you.
Because youre on top of me, you nut.
He rose on his elbows to look at me. Im half afraid to, he confessed. I dont
want to find out this is a dream.
I laced my fingers through his thick, soft hair and pulled his face to mine, tasting
myself on his lips. No dream. Although definitely good enough to be one.
So I take it my first installment of repayment met with your approval.
You dont owe me a debt to be repaid, Zak.
He rolled his eyes. Remember what I said about not telling me what to think? If I
say I owe you, then I owe you. And I intend to pay you back, no matter how long it
takes.
How long are you thinking?
Hm. Fifty, sixty years, at least.
I halted, wondering how I should take his words. Are you thinking what I think
youre thinking?
Probably.
I thought I would explode with joy, but I pretended to soberly ponder the offer. I
could live with that.

38

Good, because youre stuck with me. Im not totally useless, I promise. Im pretty
much housebroken. I can do laundry, and I know I handle my tools he wriggled
against me suggestivelybetter than any damn demon.
Oh, hell yeah, I agreed. He smirked, and my heart flipped. Oh no. Im really sunk
now.
What? Why?
I even love your smirk, I admitted. I am so screwed.
You could say that. The smirk became a squint. You seen my glasses?
Glasses? I didnt even know you wore glasses.
Glasses and contacts. Apparently one of the few benefits of demonic possession is
perfect eyesight. The demon flushed my contacts, though; kind of its way of telling
me it was here to stay.
Again, the words were spoken so casually, but I shuddered at the emotion they
veiled, the terrible hopelessness Zak must have felt trapped in his own body. I
hugged him to me fiercely before he rolled off the bed to go look for his glasses. I
better call Nick and Billy, I said. I promised them as soon as I heard something Id
let them know.
Heard something?
I flushed. They knew an exorcism was going downjust not that I was doing it.
Ohh. This should be interesting.
I was headed toward the bathroom for a quick shower when I passed the bureau
and saw the camera. Oh shit. Zak, you may have to teach me some film editing,
really quick.
He looked up from the drawer he was ransacking. Why?
I picked up the little camera. Sure enough, it was still running. I set this up to
record the exorcismand I forgot to turn it off.
With a delighted little noise he took it. You mean weve got the whole thing?
Awesome. He turned it around, lens facing him. And just for the record, I, Zak
Bagans, being of reasonably sound mind and repossessed body, would like for the
entire fuckin world to know that I LOVE this woman right here. He pointed the
camera at me and I almost ducked. I was butt naked, after all. But then, so was he;

39

and Id been this way for quite a whileI stood up straight, quit trying to hide my
boobs, and let his declaration of love wash over me. Then he pushed some more
buttons and cackled. Aw, now this is a tender moment! Look, our first homemade
porn.
Thats what I was afraid of. I peered at the tiny viewscreens picture: me
straddling Zaks lap, kissing him as he undid my pajama top, slid it off my
shoulders and scooped my breasts into his hands.
Nice melons, he said.
Thanks, I grew them myself.
The image of Zak threw his head back in a full-throated laugh that made me smile
as much now as when I first heard it. Damn, I love you.
What a coincidence, I love you toohaahoh damn, Zak, keep doing that, aaah

Watching from this angle is really weird, I said, andkinda hot.

Yeah. He flipped the camera off. Really hot. As in, go get that shower before I
toss you back on the bed and we dont get anything else done tonight.
I quickly scrubbed and hurried out, brushing past Zak on his way in. Go change
clothes. Something hot! he hollered as the bathroom door closed. I owe you
some spaghetti, and we need to celebrate.
Throwing my work clothes back on, I dashed across the parking lot to my
apartment and grabbed the nearest dressy stuff I could, which was a sparkly blue
top, black dress pants and high heel sandals. I was doctoring my makeup when my
cell phone rang. Claaaiire! Zak wailed. The fuckin demon threw out all my hair
stuff!!
I nearly wet myself trying not to laugh. I have hair spray, baby, Ill bring it.
Its girly stuff, he pouted. Waithah! A jar of my hair goop! Missed one, you
satanic asshole. Never mind, just bring your sweet butt back over here.
I ran back, still laughing to myself, and making phone calls. Zak? I called as I let
myself in. I called My voice died as he came out of the bedroom. His dark hair
was spiked, and he wore boots, well-loved jeans and narrow black-rimmed glasses.
A black t-shirt hugged his muscular upper body. Wow.
Wow? He folded his arms and looked smug.

40

For a moment I was speechless. Same body, totally different person living in it. So
bizarre. Its likewalking by a grimy pane of glass for ages, then cleaning it, and
when the sun hits it you realize its the most beautiful stained glass window ever
created. I think he was about to smirk again, but instead he actually blushed. I bit
my lip. If only Id known sooner
Stop, Claire. His voice was soft but held an unmistakable note of command.
Stop it. You can let regret smack you around from now till whenever, and it wont
change a damn thing. Whats past is past. Whats ahead is the future, our future.
From now on we look ahead, not back.
Yes, sir, I said. He wrapped me in his arms, and then picked me up and spun me
around in a circle. I squealed and giggled and clung to him.
Its Friday night, he said. Its my first Friday night in a very long time. Lets go
party.
+++
After all that, of course, it was Zak who faltered next. At supper, a few bites into a
big plate of spaghetti and mussels, he stopped and put his fork down. Isnt it
good? I asked.
He closed his eyes briefly. Thethe times the demon let me out, everything was
all hazy, like a film leached of its contrast and color, with the sound muddy. I felt
numb, as if I were sleepwalking. He licked his lips. I couldnt hear or feel, really
and Id almost forgotten how good food tastes. I reached for his hand, but he
shook me off almost angrily. Shit, whats wrong with me? Ive never wallowed in
self-pity before.
Is that what you think it is? I demanded. Bullshit! Youre trying to hide it from
me, Zak, but you are injured, just as if you'd been physically kidnapped and
beaten, like you said. Youve been through one hell of an ordeal, and you cannot
expect to mend in one night what took months to damage. Quit being so hard on
yourself! I shook my fork at him, but only succeeded in launching a backsplash of
marinara that landed on my nose.
Zak snickered and grabbed his napkin. Cmereclosercloser Then instead of
wiping it clean, he leaned across the table and licked my nose.
Idjit, I said fondly, though with a little pang. Uncle Bobby would never get to
meet Zak; I couldnt risk him finding out I was the one who had freed my beloved.

41

I love you too. Zak kissed me quickly, sat back and resumed eating. You never
said how those phone calls went down.
Oh, they didnt. Nobody answered. Billys djing at a club downtown; Nicks out of
town through the weekendhes been doing freelance film work; and Sam, well,
Lord only knows where Sam and Dean are. When he greenlighted me last night, I
dont think he really expected me to go for it tonight. I left them all messages
though, that the deal went down and you and I were both fine.
"Good enough," Zak approved. "Explanations can wait for face to face." We spent
the rest of the meal talking about inconsequentials; mostly I caught Zak up on the
world. Lets go surprise Billy, Zak said when we finished, with a mischievous glint
in his eye.
We did, and then some. Actually, Billy nearly fell out of the dj booth when we
waved up at him from the dance floor. Then he raced down and all but tackled Zak.
It was strangely moving to see a grown man with a Mohawk cry in the middle of a
packed dance club. Between sets, he hauled us off to a back room for a quick
summation of events. Stick around a while, he told us. Ive been plotting out a
set in my head, just for such an occasion.
At that, Zak sent me off to the bar for drinks and huddled with his friend. I eyed
them suspiciously, especially when I returned and Billy took off mumbling
something about download speeds. You have the look of a conspirator, I accused
Zak.
Just making a few requests, he replied easily. Its a damn shame when a mans
buddy knows more about his womans taste in music than he does.
My suspicions were confirmed when the next set beganevery song was either
one I loved (clearly Billy had paid attention during our conversations) or one Id
never heard but loved immediately. Zak said he didnt dance but I should go find a
partner, since I couldnt sit still. Really though, where else in all the world did I
want to be, except in his arms? So we snuggled on a love seat and sipped our
drinks and listened. They were love songs, all of them, full of energy and hope.
When Billy said he was about to slow things down after this special request,
therefore, I was startled when Zak pulled me to my feet.
I thought you didnt dance, I said.
This was my special request, he murmured. This one is for you.
As we swayed, he sang softly in my ear, a bit off key, but so very beautifully.

42
Like a gift from the heavens, it was easy to tell,
It was love from above, that could save me from hell,
She had fire in her soul, it was easy to see,
how the devil himself could be pulled out of me,
There were drums in the air as she started to dance,
Every soul in the room keeping time with their hands,
And we sang...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,
And the voices rang like the angels singing,
singing...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,
And we danced on into the night,
Ay oh ay oh,
Ay oh ay oh,
And we danced on into the night,
Like a piece to the puzzle that falls into place,
You could tell how we felt from the look on our faces,
we were spinning in circles with the moon in our eyes,
no room left to move in between you and I,
We forgot where we were and we lost track of time,
And we sang to the wind as we danced through the night,
And we sang...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,
And the voices rang like the angels singing,
singing...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,
And we danced on into the night,
Ay oh ay oh,
Ay oh ay oh,
And we danced on into the night,
Ay oh ay oh,
Ay oh ay oh,
And we danced on into the night
Like a gift from the heavens, it was easy to tell,
It was love from above, that could save me from hell,
You had fire in your soul, it was easy to see,
how the devil himself could be pulled out of me,
There were drums in the air as she started to dance,
Every soul in the room keeping time with their hands,
And we sang...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,

43
And the voices rang like the angels singing,
singing...
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,
And we danced on into the night,
Ay oh ay oh,
Ay oh ay oh,
And we danced on into the night

I could not fight back those damned tears. This time, instead of scolding me, Zak
simply kissed them away.
9 Fatigue overtook me not long after that. Casting out demons takes a lot out of a
girl, apparently. Zak was stifling yawns too as he drove us back to the apartment
complex. I slid out of his crappy little Japanese car and started to shuffle across the
parking lot. Claire, wherere you going?
Home? I mumbled.
Homes this way. Firm hands took hold of my shoulders and directed me up
stairs.
m not upstairs, I protested around a huge yawn. Thats your place.
Mm-hm. Fuckin demon had to stick me on the top floor.
Penthouses the best, I pointed out.
Not when you hate heights. Zak nudged the door open with his foot and steered
me into the bedroom. Now, get out of those clothes and into that bed.
I froze, blinked, and sat down hard on the bed, suddenly awake and overwhelmed
by sadness. Maybe things hadnt changed as much as Id thought. I cant
participate much, but Ill try to give you a few fake moans before I doze off. I got
lots of practice at that from your previous tenant. Dont take it personally. I was
too tired to cry, so instead I focused on undoing my sandal straps. Damn shoes
My hands were abruptly removed from their task, held in Zaks as he thumped to
his knees on the floor in front of me. What the hell are you talking about?
I just saidwell, you said get in bed and that sounded pretty much like a prelude
to sex to me, so fair warning seemed in order
No! I meant you need to get some rest. Youre too beat for any funny stuff. And
that other thing, about practice, and fakingClaire, diddid it rape you?

44

Huh? No, no. it just wanted sex when it wanted it, and didnt have my enjoyment
in mind, or anything else much. I learned to put up a good front, to not hurt your,
well its, feelings.
Zak looked torn between horror and fury. It told me it was human, once, he said,
his voice low and tight. I wish it still were, so I could kill the son of a bitch with my
bare hands. His grip tightened, and I recalled Nicks comment about Zaks hatred
of bullies. You thought I was gonna do that to you?
Im half asleep, baby, it doesnt matter
It does matter! I wouldI willnever, ever, make you do anything you dont want
to, especially not--not He choked, and I freed my hands from his to take his face
between them.
Im sorry, I soothed him. I dont have a good track record with men. My
expectations are pretty low.
Yeah, well, that track ends here, he grumbled. Now lets get on to something Im
really looking forward to. Sleep! I havent slept in two years. And I like my sleep. Id
stay up all night and sleep all day if I could.
Jolted by his words, I traced his cheekbones and lips with my thumbs. You havent
slept? Zak, how did you not lose your mind?
He shrugged and summoned a small grin. There are those whod say I lost that a
long time ago.
With a laugh I quickly undressed, then shivered and snagged his wrecked dress
shirt from the floor and threw it on over my undies. That demon kept this place so
cold!
Zak stripped and adjusted the thermostat. Nice to know the fuckers back where
there is no AC. He turned off the lights and slid under the sheets. And when I
clean out my closet, you get all those fancy shirts. They look a lot better on you
than on me.
Id never slept on his bed before, just lain on it long enough to get screwed, but it
was very comfy. There was the usual squirming and wiggling and flailing of limbs
associated with a new sleep partner, but I finally nestled into the perfect position,
with my head on Zaks shoulder, one arm across his chest and one leg tucked
between his. Yknow one reason I didnt lose my mind? he murmured as I began
to drift off. Cause I was all that stood between you and that thing.

45

I sighed and kissed his chest, and the next thing I knew I was alone in the bed. Zak
sat by the window, morning sun streaming around him. I thought you werent an
early bird, I yawned
Im not. His drowsy smile and tousled hair gave him the air of a mischievous little
boy. But this is the first morning in two years Ive had the choice of when to get
up. So, I chose to get up and watch the sun rise. He stood, and the sunbeams
gilding his naked body transformed him from impish child to Greek hero. And now
Im choosing to get back in bed. He dove under the covers and started to nibble
on me, till my giggles morphed into gasps and moans and a scream or three,
before the end. Yep, it was that damn good.
As we lay sweaty and satisfied, I asked, Whats on your schedule for the day?
Zak considered. Get new contacts. Start on this tat. He touched the pendant that
was all he wore. Get reacquainted with my townWhat dyou mean, my
schedule? What were you planning to do?
Um, laundry? He glowered. I didnt think I should invite myself along.
Consider this a permanent standing invite. Im not letting you out of my sight
anytime soon.
Youll have to, for a few minutes. I need a shower and clean clothes. And what
have you got in your kitchen for breakfast? Zaks blank look answered that
question. Never mind. Ill bring some stuff back from my place. Add a grocery run
to our itinerary. I pulled my dress pants on under his shirt and left with a kiss.
Commuting across the parking lot was going to get old fast, but for now, I thought
as I cleaned up, it would have to do. No matter how much I loved Zak or he me, it
was a little early to consider moving in together. Besides, I loved my little
sanctuary with its stacks of books, its scented candles, its devils traps discreetly
painted in near-invisible glow in the dark paint here and thereokay, so that one
isnt exactly typical girl-crib dcor, but it was mine. The thing was, I reflected while
I tossed on a sundress, grabbed some staples from the kitchen and ran back, Id
never before been with a man Id even have considered giving up that much of my
independence for.
Zaks kitchen was worse than meager, it was barren. Even Uncle Bobby would
have been hard pressed to concoct a serviceable breakfast from protein shake
powder and Toaster Strudels. I, however, had come armed. By the time Zak
padded out of the bedroom I had canned biscuits browning, eggs scrambled and
sausage cooked, and was whisking flour and milk into the sausage leavings to

46

make old fashioned gravy. When everything was ready he took a bite and made a
noise Id previously only heard him make when he was inside me. He called it a
gravygasm, and I nearly spat milk across the table. Damn, Id laughed more with
him in the past sixteen hours than in the past two years. But then, the cold man Id
known those two years wasnt Zak. This shirtless rascal, barefoot in pajama pants,
his hair going in ten different directions, grinning wickedly at me over the rim of his
coffee cup, was. I love you, I sighed happily, and his grin only widened.
After cleaning up I dashed into the bathroom to brush my teeth. Ow, shit! I yelled
and picked up my bare foot to find a droplet of blood on the ball. More of that
blasted glass. Zak, what really happened with that mirror anyhow?
He looked embarrassed as he pulled on a deep blue t-shirt with a Goth print. I
punched it, he confessed. When the demon let me out, I feltoff balance,
unstable, and I couldnt control my emotions well. It knew that, and it liked to taunt
me, try and goad me to hurt myself. I was looking in the mirror, and it was laughing
at me andI couldnt stand to look at that face anymore. He came into the
bathroom and glanced at himself. It wasnt my face; it was a strangers. So, better
to break a mirror than slice myself up with a razorThats why I lost it when Nick
called, too, I guess. It was like itd been so long since I was in control of my own
mind, Id forgotten how to act.
Not anymore, obviously. I think the demon was probably clouding your thinking. I
sat down on the commode to wipe my foot off and find the bit of broken glass, then
hopped up and kissed him. Wonderful face, and all yours. His mention of Nick
reminded me to check my messages, but there was only one, from Sam.
<congratswant 2 hear all abt itttyl> I read aloud. Hell love seeing the
video. Nothing from Nick yet though. This job must have him hopping.
Um, yeah, I guess, Zak muttered while spiking his hair. Hell call when he calls.
Now cmon, weve got a busy day ahead.
First we stopped at an opticians office, where Zak ordered new contacts, then
went to his favorite tattoo studio where I tried not to be squeamish while the artist
outlined the anti-possession emblem onto Zaks chest just below his right shoulder.
Does it hurt a lot? I asked timidly.
Like stepping on that broken glass, Zak said. But after a few minutes its not so
bad. Your body releases natural painkillers to counter it. If its a big piece like my
back, you can get a little high off it, actually. By the time they finished it was
midday, and Zak directed me to a spot where his favorite Mexican food truck had
once parked, pleased to find it still there. You should get the tat, too, he told me.

47

I dont like the idea of just a piece of clay and a leather cord between you and
some demon. And if you stick with me, you might be exposed to one again.
Since I fully intend to stick with you, Ill think about it. I always thought I might get
a tattoo someday. I checked my phone again while we ate. Still nothing from Nick.
That bothered me more than I let on.
Zak on the other hand seemed blithely unconcerned. Like you said, hes probably
really busy.
Something wasnt right about that response. I thought Nick was your best friend,
but every time I mention contacting him you blow me off. What am I missing
here?
Zaks eyes narrowed over his burrito. You dont beat around the bush, do you?
Actually, yeah, I usually do. Its funny, but I feel like I can come right out and say
what Im thinking, with you. And youre avoiding the subject again!
He looked away. Maybe its him avoiding me, he said in a low voice. I know, you
said he was all into preserving the GACslegacy, or whatever; he found the
lockdown video, yada yada. But theres a big jump between the abstract and the
concrete. The idea of Zaks back, hes okay, it was all a demons doing: thats all
well and good. But when Nick walks into a room and looks me in the face, is he
gonna still see the face of a guy who tried to kill him? I tried to protest, but he
barged on. And too, its been a long time. You said yourself hes got a new gig.
Maybe hes not interested in what we did anymore. Besides, his wife was pregnant
when I wastakenso hes got a family now, and ghost chasing may be the last
thing on his mind.
I wanted to reassure him, but the hell of it was he might be right. All I know is
what you told me last night. We cant go back, Zak, only forward. I like Nick a lot, I
consider him a friend, and I dont want to lose his friendship. And Lord knows, I
dont want to see you lose it either, after what, ten years? But whatever happens,
well get through it. When I took his hand this time, I noticed the little, barely
healed scars on his knuckles: traces of the last of who knew how many times the
demon in him had driven him to hurt himself. I wished I could protect him from any
more pain, but I couldnt. Dont write Nick off, though. Hes a smart guy, and he
cares a lot about you. Give him a little credit.
His smile was wistful. Yeah, hes sharp. Got my ass out of a few tight spots, back
in the day.

48

Just then my phone buzzed, and as though our words had summoned him up, it
was a text from Nick. <Sorry, been in a dead zone literally & figuratively. On my
way back to Vegas.> There, see, that sounds positive. I texted him back to phone
me when he got back into town.
Then Zak and I were off again. At the opticians he happily claimed his contacts; I
admitted though that I would always have a secret crush on his glasses, and he
promised to wear them for me every chance he could. After that, he finally talked
me into going under the needle. The entire time the tattooist was sketching a halfdollar sized version of the sigil against possession onto my right hip, Zak held my
hand, bantering with the staff, chatting with several customers who recognized
him, but mostly comforting me. I got the sense he enjoyed that; he seemed far
more at ease as the protector than as the one in need, and I gladly let him.
After the grocery stop it was back to Zaks. The air conditioner in his pathetic car
died on the way; he called it everything but a quality foreign-built automobile, till I
started to giggle uncontrollably and told him he had a dirtier mouth than the
demon. I was stocking the kitchen when my phone rang. Claire! Nick sounded
breathless. Is ithow is he?
Hes--good. I stepped out into the hallway and looked toward the bedroom. All I
could see of Zak was his butt sticking out of a closet where he was digging for
something. I paused to admire the view, and lowered my voice. As good as can be
expected, considering. Hes trying for perfectly normal, but theres a lot of shit hes
not telling me. Maybe hell open up to you eventually.
About the possession?
Yeah. Itsnot like he was unconscious. Nick, he says he didnt sleep for two
years. Picture being held by a sadistic serial killer, with almost infinite power over
your body and mind, for that long, and you get the idea.
Ohshit, was all he said, but it said volumes.
Yeah, I agreed and walked toward the bedroom, raising my voice back to normal.
The exorcism went off without a hitch, thanks to Zak. As soon as he realized what
was happening he jumped the demon from inside, and between the two of us we
slammed it back to
Whoa, wait a minute. The two of you? Who exactly performed the exorcism?
Um, that would be me. Silence echoed on the line. Nobody else was available,
Nick! And I already knew the principles, so an old friend taught me the specifics,

49

and it went perfectly. We even got it on video! Wait till you see it, its gonna be
awesome.
Claire, Nick groaned. I could almost see him shake his head. I chuckled, but my
laugh died away when I looked up. Zak had turned around, and for the first time
since he was freed from the demons bondage he looked scared. I put my free arm
around him and squeezed to try and ease some of the tension I felt in his frame.
So if hes okay, why hasnt he called me?
Well, he knew I called you. And needless to say, he was a little uncertain of his
reception
What? Nicks voice was soft, disbelieving, then rose. What the fuck? His
reception? From me? Put him on the phone. I tried to get a word in. Put him on
the fuckin phone, Claire!
Even Zak could hear that. I held the phone out with the question in my eyes. He
nodded slowly, and with a deep breath took it. Hey, dude. He grimaced and held
the phone away from his ear as Nick began to rant. I couldnt catch many words,
but he did call Zak several dozen types of moron. And a lot of swearing was
involved; I mean a LOT. Considering Ghost Adventures reputation, that said
something.
For a moment I thought Zak might cringe, the way Id seen the demon in him do
when his boss dressed him down or the landlord cornered him about late rent.
Either it was a wuss as demons went, or it was trying to create a persona as unlike
Zaks true self as possible. Probably the latter, I thought, either for concealment or
as one more way to torture Zak. This was no demon, though, and he did not back
down. Nick, will you shut up and listen a minute? What was I supposed to do, call
you up and act like nothing happened? Whoa, long time no see, sorry about that
near-death thing, my bad. That wouldve been a helluva note, wouldnt it? I just
Zak made a face at another outburst. Dammit dude, ihell no, it wasnt my fault,
but how the hell was I supposed to know what you thought? Im not a fuckin mind
reader With the next interruption, I could tell Zak was starting to lose patience,
and his voice rose when he replied. Come on man, you were always the cool
headyou what? Oh, really? Youre gonna come over here and kick my ass? All
righty then. Bring it on, bro! Youre welcome to try Abruptly, his voice trailed off,
and I couldnt hear sound leaking from the other end of the call either. Zak listened
intently, and when he spoke again, his tone was soft and almost incredulous.
Nickdude, are you crying?
An instant later, his eyes flicked to mine. He hung up.

50

10 He what?
Hung up on me. Zak tossed me my phone.
Butwhy? What did he say?
Short version: he tore into me for not calling him myself; accused me of putting
you up to calling him
Huh? Nobody put me up to anything!
said he didnt want to hear how sorry I was, that we both knew the truth about
what went down in Kansas, and that he never knew me at all.
I was dumbstruck. No. NO, Zak. That cant be right. Ive talked to Nick for weeks. I
just talked to him a minute ago! Hes been so hopeful, so excited that maybe we
could get you back. What made himdo you think, if I hadnt said you were
concerned about his reaction
Wouldnt have changed anything. Zak shook his head and rubbed his face,
looking suddenly very weary. I think he does blame me.
He doesnt! How could he? He knows about the demonhe sat right next to me
when we watched the video. Surely you misunderstood him. Its gonna be okay,
Zak, I understand what you
No, you dont! he yelled. Wed seen so much, the three of us, been through so
much together. Nick and Aaron, they were like the brothers I never had. Nothing
could break us apart, nothing from outside, anywaySo stop with the positive
thinking bullshit, because you dont have any idea what Im feeling right now!!
He stormed out, leaving me open-mouthed, and sadly forced to agree with him. I
found my purse, and that faithful green grocery bag, and took them out into the
living room. Zak was slouched on the couch, staring at the ceiling. Youre right, I
told him quietly. I really cant fully grasp what youre going through, as much as I
want to. You might feel more comfortable talking to Nick alone. Funny, how earlier
in the day I was mentally marshalling arguments for holding onto my
independence, and now the thought of being banished from Zaks life tore at me
like claws. Still, I managed to finish, Do you want me to leave?
I probably should, he said dully, eyes still fixed on the ceiling. Ive got to relearn
to stand on my own two feet sometime, especially if I have to put my life and my

51

work back together without them. Yeah, I probably should. He sat up and pierced
me with those eyes. But I dont. I dont want you to go.
Then I wont. I set my bags in a corner and went to sit beside him. I cant help
but think theres some missed communication here. Tell me exactly what Nick said
to you.
Zak let out an explosive sigh. Fine. He thought for a moment. First, he said, as
long as wed known each other, how could I not want to talk to him. I tried to tell
him I didnt know what to say, really. Then he said I put you up to calling and he
wanted to know why, and, uh, he didnt want to hear how sorry I was or that it was
all my fault.
You didnt say that before. See, if those were his exact words, that puts a whole
different spin on it.
Maybe, he said, though he sounded unconvinced. Then he said, we both knew
what really went down in Kansas, and He scowled as he mentally reconstructed
the conversation. If I didnt have the balls to face him, or trust him enough to tell
him the truth, then I wasnt the person hed thought I was. And then he said hed
make me say it whatever that meant, if he had to kick my ass to do it. I kind of
blew my stack then, and ripped into him. But he didnt yell back. All I heard was
this little noise, like somebody trying to breatheor cryingand he hung up.
It makes no sense. I dont know what he could be thinking!
Well know soon enough.Zak slumped again, his face in his hands. Jesus, he
said softly, in a tone more evocative of prayer than oath. I already lost Aaron, I
dont want to lose Nick too.
I slid my arms around him and we sat in silence as the afternoon shadows began to
creep in. The stillness was broken by a peremptory knock. You want me to I
began.
Zak shook his head. I turned on a lamp and perched on the couch arm as he
opened the door. For all his anxiety, the look on his face when he saw Nick
standing there was sheer joy. Hey, dude.
Nicks face was a kaleidoscope: anger, hurt, maybe a little fear, and I hoped a little
joy chased each other across his features. He pushed past Zak and came inside; I
noticed he didnt have his cane. Okay, man, Im here. He planted his feet and
faced Zak like a man waiting for a punch. Say what youve gotta say, so we can
both move on.

52

That hurt even me, so I couldnt imagine what Zak must have felt. He frowned. I
dont really know what you want. I cant say this whole mess was my fault, but I
am sorry, so sorry for so many things. Im sorry I didnt get those wall markings
checked out more thoroughly. I went off half cocked like I always do, and used
them as a trigger without knowing what I was using them for. Im sorry a demon
took advantage of my stupidity. Im sorry for what it did to you, and to Aaron. Hell,
while were at it, Im sorry I ever dragged you two into the paranormal business to
begin with. What do you want to hear from me, Nick?
Anger darkened Nicks face now. What I dont want is your lies! he yelled. He
stepped forward into Zaks space, and shoved him hard.
Zaks eyes widened in shock; he took a step back, hands up in a placatory posture.
What the fuck?
Nick! I gasped. I hadnt noticed till I saw them together, but Nick was taller and
likely had a longer reach. I wouldnt bet against Zaks solid muscle in a fight, but I
did not want this to go there.
Stay out of this, Claire, Nick said without turning around. Weve gotta settle this,
him and me. Stop pretending to take the blame, Zak. We both know better. You
wouldnt talk to me, and theres only one reason I can think of why: because you
know whos to blame for what happened to you. Aaron would never have fucked
with you that night if I had said no. We left you locked in with thatthingIve
seen it. We got it on video! And all I could think as I watched it, over and over and
over again, was oh God, its snakes, big black snakes, and Zaks so deathly afraid
of snakes, andandif wed been where we were supposed to be, in there beside
you, maybe it couldnt have
Bullshit! Zak snapped. You may have seen it, Nick, but I lived it. The bastard
was so fuckin strong. You think I didnt fight it? Hell, I couldnt make a dent in it! If
all three of us had been in that room when it manifested, it mightve been strong
enough to take all of us. Wouldnt that have been fun? I was afraid to talk to you,
because for all I knew youd take one look at me and hate me for what I let that
beast in my body do to you!
I dont hate you! Nick yelled.
Then why are you yelling at me?
So I dont start crying again like a fuckin girl! Nick raised his hands again, and I
tensed, ready to come off that couch arm. I liked him, a lot, but if he touched Zak
in anger again hed have me to deal with. Instead, he waved his hands helplessly;

53

then they fell to his sides, and he just stood and stared at Zak, and I could see the
tears fill his eyes and spill over.
If you put a gun to my head, I still could not say with any certainty which of them
moved first. In the space between one breath and the next, Zak and Nick were
hugging and pounding on each others backs. Nick kept swearing under his breath
and saying Zaks name and Im so sorry, and Zak kept saying shut the fuck UP, bro,
which didnt seem to help matters any. I was pretty sure there was not a box of
Kleenex in the place, so I slid off my perch and off to the bathroom to retrieve a roll
of toilet paper. When I got back Nick was saying, was when you said bring it on
brodude, I never thought Id hear you call me that again, not ever, all that gone,
because I was such a fuckin douche
Claire! Zak yelled over his shoulder. I thought you said you talked some sense
into him.
I thought I did too. Could it be hes even harder headed than you? I solemnly
offered them the TP.
Nick let out a shaky laugh. No chance of that, he denied, taking a big hunk of
tissue and blowing his nose.
Crying like a fuckin girl, indeed. If I didnt like you so much Id be seriously
offended, I snarled. Well, I tried to snarl. I really did. Did you know its next to
impossible to snarl around a big lump in your throat? Wheres your cane?
Outside. I was so mad I figured I might beat the shit out of him with it.
Hah. Zak ignored the tissue, clearly choosing to deny the fact that he had tears
running off the end of his nose. More like, you were afraid Id take it away from
you and school you with it.
Oh yeah?
Yeah! Chest bumping and pushing and shoving ensued, but accompanied by big
grins this time. Your plan failed anyhow, Zak pointed out. You still ended up
crying like a fuckin girl.
May I remind you two macho shitheads, I put in, that the fuckin girl is the only
one in this room currently not crying?
Not because you dont want to, Zak fired back.

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Damn, I said. Youve already got me figured out. I put a finger to his lips. Dont
tell everybody. His lips enveloped my fingertip, and he did this thing to it with his
tongue and front teeth, this thing he liked to do to my nipples when they were
hard. I made a noise a girl really shouldnt make in the presence of other men.
Oh, damn, Nick mock-groaned. Get a room, you two.
We got one, Zak retorted while I rescued my molested finger. Youre standing in
it.
I missed whatever Nicks rejoinder was. Laughter bubbled up in my chest, but
when it hit that blasted lump in my throat, it turned into tears. All right, I
hiccupped. Fine, you happy? Its unanimous.
The guys looked at each other. What are you crying about? Zak asked.
You two. Itsso right. Like youve always been that way, and always will be. The
way you just fell back into place. It makemakes me so happy.
You got a clue what shes talking about? Zak asked Nick.
Maybe, Nick nodded wisely. But dont feel bad. Ive just had more experience
with emotional women than you.
I dropped the TP so I could flip them both off at the same time, but the impact was
totally ruined when Nick caught me up in a huge hug. Thank you, he said fiercely
in my ear. Thank you for giving me my friend back.
Wasnt me, I said sincerely. You found the key and gave it to me. I just stuck it in
the lock and turned it. And then of course he I tilted my head in Zaks general
directionkicked the damn door off its hinges.
Doesnt matter. Nick squeezed me again. You started it all. You made it
happen.
Zak cleared his throat loudly. Uh, should I be jealous, you two?
Nick didnt let go of me, but he did move back far enough to grin down at me. The
man had a smile to melt the Statue of Libertys knees. It was obvious how hed
caught his wife. Not unless they legalize polygamy in Nevada, he told Zak.
Not even then, I said with feigned sadness, which became a giggle as I reached
for Zak. Since Nicks arms were still around me, we ended up in a big group hug,
and that too was so right. The feeling of both their arms around me, my beloved,

55

and my newest and dearest friend, was indescribable, like running headlong into
destiny.

11 I was the one who finally broke the circle. There were groceries to put up, and
they provided me a perfect excuse to give the guys a little time to themselves. Sit
down, dude, Zak was saying to Nick as I left the living room. Take a load off. You
wanna beer? Claire! Could you toss us a beer, sweetie?
Just one for the two of you to share? Should I be jealous of you two? I asked with
tongue in cheek as I got two beers and took them out.
Not unless youre up for threesomes, Zak returned, hiking his eyebrows and
doing his best to look thoroughly lecherous. Nick shook with laughter.
Sorry, I dont share well. I handed them the bottles and used my free hands to
grab Zaks upturned face and kiss him hard. Good Lord, this man had turned me
into a wild woman! I retreated as fast as I could, but my momentary discomfiture
was dispelled by Zaks belly laugh that followed me back into the kitchen.
To good times, I heard Zak say, more quietly, accompanied by the clink of
longnecks. Your knee okay? If you need the cane Ill go get it.
No! Nicks sharp tone was fleeting. I mean, thanks, but Im good. I dont need it
much anymore, and frankly Im hoping I can break it over the docs head real soon.
Remind me though, Ive got some of your stuff downstairs, Ill give it to you before
I go.
Whyd you do that? Keep that stuff, I mean. Claire says youve got all our old gear,
even.
Well, Im still into paranormal investigations. In factthats where Ive been the
last couple of days, running cameras for some guys filming in a ghost town up in
the hills. They suck, though. As many people as they had stomping around, every
ghost in miles would be scared off. When I left I think they were about to fake some
evidence just to have something to show their backers. Nothing like what we did.
Im kind of surprised, youre still willing to go out, after
Still willing, hell, more than willing. And what was I gonna do with all that gear
anyway? Besides, with you and Aaron both gone it wasit was all I had left of
those days. Dont know what to do with it now, though, cause I know you wouldnt
touch a spirit now with a twenty foot

56

You kidding? Fuck yeah, I would. I will. Ive gotta get back into lockdown shape
damn demon let my gym membership lapse, not that I couldve afforded it on the
shitty day job it stuck me with. But yeah. I am a paranormal investigator. Its who I
am, its what I do. Although I dont want to do it without you and Aaron. Do you
know where he is, seriously?
No, seriously. He went back to Oregonyou know how he always said he missed
the coastand I heard from him a few times. Then last fall, he called me. He knew
I was looking for you, but he told me to stay away from you if I even could track
you down. Then, nothing.
What thewell yeah, that makes sense, after what Iitno, I did to him, as far as
he knows. When we find him, surely the videos will help him to understand. If he
cant work with me, at least hell know it wasnt me who hurt him.
You still want back in, for real? Afterwhat happened to you?
Thats why the fuckin demon kept me! When it got into me, it ripped through my
mind, my memories; it saw what I did, what we did, and it saw us as a threat.
Busting up the team served its interests. If I dont go back in, then it wins. And I
will NOT let it win.
Silence. It was pretty awful, wasnt it. Nicks tone was not that of a question.
As awful as you could imagine, dude, and then some.
Claire knows theres shit youre not telling her. So much for sharing my secrets
with Nick. Thanks a lot, dude, I mentally growled.
And wont either, if I can help it. Its bad enough, what she already knowsshe
got into my mind somehow, did you know that? In her dreams. She saw some of
what happenedand Im not about to dump any more on her.
I dont think she needs protection, Zak. Women are a lot tougher than we guys
sometimes give them credit for.
Dont think I dont know that. Suddenly Zak sounded as though he were smiling.
Wait till you see the exorcism. She was fuckin fearless. My little Amazon. At the
pride in his voice, my heart felt like it grew two sizes. Not that I was
eavesdropping, but it was a pretty amazing feeling .
Quiet reigned for a few moments, till Nick abruptly said, Dont hurt her.
Huh?

57

Youre my bro, man, but shes my friend. She loved you before she even met you
really. When we watched the lockdown video, she nearly broke my hand squeezing
it. And seeing the entity creep up behind you, she was practically screaming at the
screen, crying and begging you to turn around and see it before it nailed youall
Im saying is, dont think its love if its not, if youre just glad to be free, or glad
she
FUCK! I already went through all this with her! Ive been watching her for months,
Nick. I couldnt talk to her or touch her, but I watched her. If there was any way I
could have kept myself from falling for her I would have, because that son of a
bitch destroyed everything I cared about, and I didnt need to give it another
hostage. I had to pretend I didnt give a damn, pretend she was just a piece of
but I love her. I LOVE her. Zaks voice almost shook, and I had to sit down on the
kitchen floor to fight the urge to rush out there and hold him and tell him I believed
him with all my heart. I prayed Nick believed him too.
A little sigh of relief eased my concern. Yeah. I can tell, really; its like, in your
body language, the way you look at her and touch her. But I wanted to hear it from
you. I guess you two were meant for each other though. Only you could attract a
woman who thinks shooting herself performing an exorcism is awesome.
They laughed together, quietly. True, Zak chuckled. Okay, enough of the chick
flick bullshit. Tell me whats up with you. Roni was pregnant when I wastakenso
howd the baby bump develop?
The baby bumps name is Annabelle, and she is almost two.
Dude. You got a daughter? Keep that cane then, youll need it to fight horny
teenage boys off in a few years.
This sounded like a good time to make my return. I got a bottle of hard cider out of
the fridge (I bought that for myself as a regular treat) and found Nick showing off
baby pictures on his phone. I bet shes even cuter in person, I said after admiring
them. Hope we get to see her soon.
Nicks smile was halfhearted. I hope so butRoni hasnt exactly been thrilled that
I was even looking for Zak, much less that I found him.
I felt rather than saw Zak flinch. I guess so, he said reluctantly. Shes the one
who had to nurse you through what I did to you He held up a hand to forestall
Nicks angry reply. Okay, I didnt do it, but its all the same as far as shes
concerned. Look at Claire; she was about ready to take your head off just for

58

shoving me. I didnt know hed noticed. Women get that way about their men,
apparently.
I couldnt really argue; he was right. Does she know enough about what you do? I
mean, could she see the videos, and would she understand that it wasnt Zaks
fault?
Maybe, Nick conceded. So, lets see this exorcism. And please tell me how you
ended up doing it! That meant that after I got my laptop and the camera, I had to
explain (while Zak patched the camera into the computer) about Uncle Bobby, and
Sam, and the whole process including devils traps and anti-possession sigils, using
Zaks necklace to illustrate. Nick was suitably awed.
Zak hadnt seen the lockdown video yet, so to keep things in order, I showed it to
him first. When Aarons face appeared onscreen, Zaks sad smile was a twin to the
one Nick had worn watching Zak in this footage, that night at Billys. He shook his
head when his image tacked the demon-summons on the wall. I am a fuckin
idiot, he said to the room. And he hung his head when the onscreen Zak
laughingly threatened to kick Aarons ass. Damn, I wish I hadnt said thatyou
cant take shit like that back. No wonder hes afraid of me.
He doesnt know, I tried to reassure him. Youll find him, you and Nick, and show
him the truth.
Next, we ran the exorcism footage for Nick. I paused it occasionally to explain
some things, and Zak added a few comments about how hed seized the moment
when the demon was weakened by the ritual to jump it and wrestle control of his
body back from it. Nick watched open-mouthed, till Zak stopped the camerajust
before things began to get, shall we say, personal. Thatd be the most amazing
evidence ever shot, if we could show it on air.
Do you think wed ever have a show again to show anything on? Zak asked.
Maybe, Nick returned after a moments thought. The network still gets good
enough ratings that they run the reruns every Friday, and some Saturdays too. In
fact he grabbed Zaks remote and turned on his tv. Sure enough, there they
were on the screen. Hey, its Hillview Manor. Remember playing golf?
Zak laughed and they began a running commentary of the episode. And then of
the next one, interspersed with debate about a possible revival, whether Billy
would join them on lockdowns (the consensus was hell no), how theyd explain to
the network, and where to start looking for Aaron. Somewhere along the way Zak

59

made a phone call and pizza arrived at the door. And the next thing I knew it was
almost midnight. Nick, is your wife going to be mad? I asked him.
He stood up but didnt look very upset. Ill explain. Shell be okay. Shell have to. I
just got you back, bro, Im not giving you up again.
Oof! Thanks, bro, Zak responded as Nick wrapped him in a big hug, and then me
too. Dont forget my stuff, dude, Zak added as we started to walk Nick out. Hey,
I got something for you. He handed Nick the necklace I had given him. Ive got a
permanent version going, he said, tugging his shirt collar aside to show the
outline of the sigil. Keep that on you, and cleanse and protect your house, if
youre not still doing it. That demon knows who we are and where we are, and its
probably pissed now. I gulpedI honestly hadnt thought of that, but I reassured
myself that my apartment was protected, and mentally resolved to do the same to
Zaks.
The three of us walked downstairs and out into the parking lot. The night wind
brushed past us with a hint of promised rain. I smothered a squeal when I saw
what Nick had brought, an instant before Zak stopped dead in his tracks. Dude,
that looks like His voice fell. Its my Jeep. Whered you
Used car lot. Couldnt leave a sweet ride like that for some midlife crisis to buy.
Nick grinned broadly and held up the keys. Trade ya.
Zaks hand visibly shook as he reached for them. You dont want that rice-burning
piece of shit, he whispered. The AC doesnt even work.
I can get it fixed. Itll be perfect for Roni and Annabelle to run errands and stuff.
Zak had held up so well, but he bent double, seemingly overwhelmed, and looked
up at his friend wordlessly, tears streaking down his cheeks. There were tears in
Nicks eyes too, but he was still smiling. I told you, dudethe stuff was all I had to
hold onto. Oh, here. Nick retrieved his cane, then dug around in the glove box and
pulled out a stack of envelopes. The network couldnt find you so they sent me,
being the other executive producer, all your royalty checks.
Zak literally stammered as he flipped through them. Dudetheres thousands of
dollars in here. You needed that for medical bills, and
Travel Channel covered all that. And thats your name on the checks, not mine.
Andmaybe, as crazy as it seemed, a part of me was hoping this night would
come, and I could give them to you.

60

It was a gift greater than Nick could have imagined: not just the gift of his faith in
Zak and his love for him (yeah, I said it, even if both of them would have had fits to
hear it, Im sure), but the money Zak needed to escape the hand to mouth
existence the demon had forced him into. After more hugs and promises to talk
later, Nick finally cranked Zaks crappy little car and drove off. Zak sat down
behind the wheel with a tired but happy little noise.
I crawled all over that Jeep, admiring every gadget and bit of chrome (a girl doesnt
spend all those summers at a junkyard without learning some appreciation for
good cars) before I sighed, I guess I should be going.
Zak was going through the checks, probably adding them up in his head, but he
looked up sharply at that. Where?
Um, my apartment.
Why?
Ahbecause I live there?
Right. Gonna have to do something about that. Wonder if the landlordll let us
apply the rent youve paid for the rest of this month to my place. It sucks, but itll
do till I get a better gig going. I dont want to spend all this at once; well need
some of it to cover us. I bet we have to do some traveling to track Aarons ass
down. Unless, hm, maybe we could talk Travel into spotting us, for a Ghost
Adventures comeback special. Whatever. Anyway, itll be a tight fit, but I bet you
dont have that much stuff, and we can manage until I can afford someplace
bigger. Wonder if my old house is on the market. I miss my dungeon! Lets drive by
there tomorrow; whoevers there now, theyll think some freaks are stalking em,
heh Zaks voice trailed off as he took in my steady stare. What?
Im not sure, but I think you may have just ordered me to move in with you.
He thought for a moment. Quite possibly.
Remember what you said last night, about not wanting to be told what to do? I
have that same problem. Actually, I never had, but something had changed in me
in recent days. Facing down a demon tends to make one less fearful of mortals,
maybe.
Zaks mouth opened and closed a couple of times. He may have been intending to
bluff or joke his way through, but apparently he could tell I would not yield. Im
sorry, Claire, he said suddenly. I guess I forgot to warn you, I can be bossy. Just
because I know what I want. And I want, I need, you. I love you so much. I told you

61

already I didnt want to be without youdid you think I was kidding? And when the
He stopped, swallowed, and looked away. When the nightmares come, he
went on, more quietly, and they will, Ive had them off and on for yearstheyll be
fuckin doozies, and Im selfish enough to want you there to hold me.
I had half a dozen arguments forming up ranks in my head as he spoke, but his last
words halted every action of my brain, except one. What the hell am I doing? it
was a thought, but it came out of my mouth before I could stop it. What the HELL
am I doing? Im arguing for the sake of arguing, when the thing I want most in all
the world is to be with you. I practically threw myself into his arms, and we sat
there calming each other down. When I felt Zaks body relax, I shook him a bit to
be sure he hadnt fallen asleep. Come on, I said. Before we both pass out, out
here, wed better go demon-proof yourOUR apartment.

12 it was a good thing I yielded to my good sense when I did, because the
nightmares came that very night. I woke to twitches and jerks beside me in the
bed, and sounds I had prayed I would never hear in the waking world; stifled
moans of pain, and then a broken whisper: Help me, GodI dont want to die like
this
Strangling my own cry, I grabbed for Zaks stiff, struggling body. Zak? Wake up,
baby, youre dreaming!
With one last groan his eyes opened wide, dark with terror until he awoke fully and
toppled in a sweaty, shivering heap in my arms. I breathed reassurance and held
him tight, kissing his shaking shoulders and scratching lightly at his scalp with my
fingertips. Sorry, he mumbled finally.
For what, being human?
For waking you up. Diddid I scream?
No. It was what I remember from the dreams. Little noises, like you werent going
to give the sonovabitch the satisfaction of making you yell out loud.
Oh, I did, he said darkly.
I squeezed him. Not anymore. But itll take a while for your subconscious to
recognize that youre safe.

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We lay in quiet for a few moments. I shifted my weight slightly from side to side,
rocking him gently. Wanna hear something really embarrassing? he muttered
into my chest.
Sure. Of course, Ill post it online first thing in the morning.
He snorted. I do feel safe with you, he said suddenly. Isnt that pitiful? Im
supposed to be this big, strong tough guy, and I only feel like the monsters not
gonna get me when Im with you
Me, who helped you kick the monsters ass. Whats abnormal about that? Quit
trying to minimize what happened to you, Zak! I tugged lightly at his hair till he
looked up at me. There will be times when I need your strength. Ill need you to
hold me up, and I know you will. Right now, you need me, and Im here, and Im
going to stay here. Thats what love is about, to me, and I love you, so there you
go.
A tired little smile curved his lips. Girls, he sighed. I think he was trying to sound
exasperated. Then he snuggled back into my boobs and was asleep again in no
time. I wasnt long in following.
+++
No more nightmares troubled us, and we slept late Sunday morning. Both of us, I
suspect, were more worn out by the events of the last two days than we realized.
When we finally got up we puttered around, I finally did laundry and brought a few
things from my apartment. It felt strangely wonderful to see my toothbrush next to
Zaks in the bathroom, and my makeup bag on the bureau where the battered little
GAC camera had sat sturdily recording the rite that freed him.
Zak was eager to get his Jeep on the road, so we rode around town a while. We
drove past his old house, which was impressive but not up for sale. Considering his
description of how Billy had converted the basement into a dungeon, I thought that
might just be a good thing. As we sat at a red light Zaks phone buzzed with a text
from Nick, who had persuaded his wife to have us over.
Annabelle was every bit as precious as her photos and then some. Nick hauled Zak
off with him for grill-and-toddler duty, and while I helped Roni in the kitchen my
eyes kept wandering to the window where the two men played with the tiny girl.
She had to tap on my arm to get my attention and hand me a cup of coffee.
Youre very engrossed in watching them, she said.

63

Yeah. Honestly, I was thinkinghopingone day thatll be our children Zaks

playing with.
Roni regarded me steadily. Nick tried to explain what happened, but youll forgive
me if its a little hard to believe.
Of course it is. Id have trouble too, if it were my man whod been harmed by his
best friend, and then the guy turned up with this story. Did you see the videos?
Yes, and if anything, that made it harder, because I couldnt deny what I saw. But
theres more to it than that. Tell me about it. And I did. Boy, did I ever. There are
things one woman can tell another that no man, however good a friend or dear a
lover, can fully understand. By the time I finished, we were both sitting at her
kitchen table with tears in our eyes. I get it, she said simply.
A couple of hours and a sizable number of hamburgers later, the guys decided to
go to Nicks storage unit and start organizing the GAC equipment. I needed to pack
some more things to move over to Zaks, and frankly I wanted to give him and Nick
some more time to re-establish their relations; so even though I would have
enjoyed digging through the gear, I opted to have them drop me off at the
apartment complex. I watched them drive off, both grinning like goons, with the
radio blaring, and felt that sense of destiny again.
As I headed for my own door, I paused to admire a gorgeous old car parked nearby.
It was a big black Chevy Impala, late 60s, I thought, in prime condition. It looked
oddly familiar, and as I ran my hand along its fender, a memory abruptly rose to
meet me: a younger me in a wide back seat, between two boys pestering each
other and me; a dark-haired man behind the wheel, who even pre-pubescent me
knew was one handsome fellow; and my uncle riding shotgun with a big grin.
I broke into a run, briefly disappointed to find no one in the hallway outside, and
flung my apartment door open. A dimpled, dark-haired man looked up from my
love seat. Get your boots off my coffee table, Dean Winchester! I hollered before
tackling him with a squeal of delight.
Damn, do I still look like I did at fifteen? You knew me right away. I was hopin for
some character with age.
Well, you got that, I conceded. Damn, he was fine, even better looking than his
daddy. Wheres The other man in my living room rose from a crouch, where
hed been inspecting my book collection, and my mouth fell open. Sam! Good
Lord, no wonder Dean called you a sasquatch! The skinny short kid I recalled had
grown into at least six foot four of solid and very attractive man, who picked me

64

right up off my feet in his embrace. Well, um, this is one great surprise. So what
do I owe this to?
Sam hemmed and hawed, but Dean, as ever, did not. Wantin to see for ourselves
what the fuck youd gotten yourself into.
Lovely. He knows, I said to Sam.
He had it figured out before I told him, Sam replied.
And Uncle Bobby? I dreaded the answer. Sam nodded. Damn. Im sure Im not
welcome in his junkyard anytime soon.
Neither Winchester answered that statement directly. Deans right, just not very
diplomatic about it, Sam said instead. We want to hear all about the exorcism.
And how the hell did you film it?
Thats on my laptop, which is across the parking lot at Zaks. Well get over there
in a fewI cant wait for you guys to meet him, hes so great, youll like himbut
right now youll have to follow me around while I pack.
They exchanged a significant look. Pack? Sam asked, trying to sound casual.
Yeah, enough stuff for a week, say. Not the whole place, thatll take a few weeks;
some of it over there, some in storage, and some crap I need to get rid of anyway.
Umyoure moving in with the guy, Dean said.
I stopped halfway to my bedroom and glared at them. Um, yeah. Who appointed
you twonever mind, I know who. And the answer is still yes, Im moving in with
the guy. Now move fast or youll miss the story. I started talking while I sorted and
packed and tossed stuff, and sure enough Sam and Dean followed me around the
apartment.
About the time I worked my way through to my preparations for the exorcism, my
phone rang. Hey, sweetie, where are you? Zak asked.
Hey, babe! Im at my place. You wont believe who dropped by. Sam, my exorcism
tutor. Sam laughed. And his brother. Come on over and meet them.
A few moments later, the door opened and Zak came in. I made introductions, but
things didnt start off as I had hoped. He eyed Sam and Dean with some odd look,
and they returned the gesture. I tried to put a good face on matters, finishing my
description by showing them the devils traps Id marked at the front door and in
the bedroom. We saw those already, Dean said begrudgingly. Nice job.

65

Glad a little praise didnt break your jaw, I retorted, my nerves starting to wear
with the tension among the men. Come help me carry this stuff to Zaks and well
show you and Sam the video.
Zak seemed a little more at ease in his own place, offering the brothers beers, but
he visibly bristled and included me in the evil eye when I fetched my laptop and
sat on the living room couch between Sam and Dean. So, he said, taking a swig
of his beer, you two go back a long way with Claire.
A very long way, Sam replied.
Id say we were like family, but that couldve bordered on the incestuous at
times, Dean added. I whacked him sharply across the stomach with one hand.
Oof! What?
Watch your mouth, I grumbled, eyes and hands busy bringing up the video files.
Hey, just doin my duty as a friend!Dean protested.
I seriously doubt a friend would spread innuendo about a ladys personal Zak
began.
Enough! I snapped and put the computer down. This shit is gonna stop right
now. You, I pointed at Zak, I love you with all my heart, but I do have male
friends, and you are not gonna get all snide about it. And you two, I turned on
Sam and Dean, you mean the world to me, and so does Uncle Bobby, but not one
of you has the right of approval of the man that I love. So pull up your big boy
britches, and lets see if we can get along, shall we?
I picked up my laptop with exaggerated care, because I was mad enough to throw
it at somebodys fool head. The room was dead silent. Shit, Dean said at last. I
glanced up and saw him look across the room at Zak. She been this way long?
No. I dont think I had anything to do with it, though.
You didnt, I said without raising my eyes from the screen. Ive concluded that
kicking a demon in the ass gives one a whole new level of self-confidence in
dealing with mortals.
You know, shes got a point, Sam said. Dean, remember our first exorcism?
You kidding? You never forget your first.
Get your head out of the gutter, I said, if you want to see this footage. Zak
walked around behind the couch, leaned over the back and slid his arms around

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my neck. I caught one hand in mine and kissed it, then hiked an eyebrow at Dean
to dare him to speak. Wisely, he did not.
I ran the footage as we had for Nick, pausing here and there to add comments.
Sam was thrilled with my performance, and even Dean had to admit Id done a
great job for a rookie. After that, though, both Winchesters began peppering Zak
with questions about his possession, things I would never have asked; and worse
yet, he answered them, a little hesitantly at times, but bravely. Some of what he
described meshed with what Id seen in my dreams, and some was new to me, but
I toughed it out and fought back the tears. If Zak could survive it, I could survive
hearing about it.
In the middle of Zaks description of some knifeplay, though, Dean suddenly stood
up and bolted toward the bathroom. Sorry, Sam said to Zaks baffled look.
Dean, um, spent some time in Hell, a few years back. Iguess what you were
saying hit him close to home.
I know I looked as horrified as Zak did. Should I I said and started to get up and
go after Dean.
Sam shook his head. He wont want that. Hell be back in a minute. We talked
briefly; I asked if Sam thought I could safely teach Zak and Nick the exorcism, and
he agreed.
When Dean returned, looking a little pale, Zak turned to him and said sincerely,
Im sorry, dude.
Dont be, man. I asked for it. This time the look that passed between them was
more of kindred spirits, and what tension remained in the room dissipated.
Speaking of asking for stuff, I havent seen the video of the possession. If youre
okay with that, Zak.
Zak was, and I cued up the Kansas lockdown; but I was unprepared for what
happened next. Billy had edited it down to the relevant parts, but the sequence
still began with Aaron placing the static night vision camera. When his face popped
up onscreen, Dean visibly started. Whoa! he said. I know that guy!

13 Zaks brow furrowed. You would if youve ever seen our show, he began.
Oh hell no, I dont watch civilians playing Dean started, then slowed and
stopped. Sorry about that. Umfuck. This is just awkward. Sam snickered and

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earned himself a death glare from Dean. But no, I mean, Ive met that guy. I
remember. Hell, we sat half a night in a bar.
Now Sam looked puzzled, and even a little put out. Where was I?
You? Probably back at the motel styling your hair, princess, Dean jibed and
returned his attention to Zak. Anyway, it was right after New Years, we were in
Salina, Kansas, and I went out to this bar to grab a beer. This guy was talking to
the bartender about ghosts, so I thought Id set him straight. Turned out he knew a
good bit, though, enough that by the time I left, I thought he might be a hunter.
Then why didnt you say something to him about that? I asked.
Darlin, other hunters dont always get along with us, Dean returned. And he
didnt come out and say exactly anyway. He said his name was John, and he was a
filmmaker, doing a documentary about folklore, urban legends, that kind of thing. I
let on that I had an interest in the weird, and we had a coupla beers and just
talked. He asked about places Id been, I pointed him toward some relatively
harmless spots and told him a few friend of a friend kind of tales. That was about
the extent of it.
Zak was excited. Great, great. Salina, Kansas. Early January. Okay, thats the first
solid lead weve got on Aaron. Thanks. Thats another one I owe you guys. Not that
I can really repay somebody for giving me my life back. But I could at least buy you
dinner.
Food! Dean brightened. Ill always accept food in payment of a blood debt.
Sam elbowed him. What? Youve never turned down a meal, bigfoot.
Cmon, then, Zak said. I know the best barbecue place in Vegas, and unless a
lot has changed, Sunday is all you can eat night.
We piled into the Jeep and took off. At the restaurant, Zak took a moment to text
Nick with the news about Deans encounter with Aaron, then asked the waitress to
change the channel on the TV visible from our table. While Nick and I were out,
we ran into a sportscaster I used to know. Of course he had to get me on camera
for a minuteIm kind of curious how I look on TV now.
Sam was curious about everything related to Ghost Adventures, and Zak obligingly
shared some stories of past lockdowns. I ate and listened quietly. It was good to
see Zak begin to emerge from his self-defensive shell and really reconnect with the
world. The news story finally aired, and was brief but revealing. The reporter was
full of questions about where Zak had been and what hed been doing. Zak was

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suitably mysterious, saying only hed been in a dark place, and that he hoped to
get back to ghost hunting, maybe even back in television, but only with Nick and
Aaron. When asked why now, Zak just smiled and said, An angel grabbed me and
pulled me up out of hell. Sam grinned, but Dean looked oddly thoughtful.
Back at the complex, Zak paid suitable homage to the gorgeous old Impala that
had belonged to Sam and Deans father. As they headed off, they promised to stay
in touch and to give Uncle Bobby a good report. I sighed as their taillights
vanished, hoping that coming from them, that might be enough to eventually save
my relationship with my uncle. See, I told you youd like them, I told Zak.
Yeah, theyre all right. Im sorry about the, uh, prickliness, earlier. I dont always
hit it off with strangers. I let slide the prickliness that had looked more akin to
jealousy, as we headed upstairs and readied for bed. Zak wasnt thrilled about
working a nine to five job, but since the demon had committed him to it he felt
obliged to do his best for the film company until he found other work, hopefully, as
he had told his reporter acquaintance, more ghost hunting on film.
You didnt have to go and call me an angel, though, I teased, lying in bed.
Why not? he retorted, sliding in beside me. You are my angel.
With that in my head, I slipped off to sleep
::and find myself back in a familiar place, the old Ohio prison. The walls are still
decaying and dank, but watery sunlight is filtering through the cracked windows. I
stride down the cell block, making no attempt to hide, and I am not alone. Zak is
with me, holding my hand. Hes dressed all in black leather, and damn, does he
look good. Makes me wonder how the spirits of this place would react if I jumped
his bones right here and now. I dont open my mouth, but he looks sideways at me
with a tiny smirk, as though he knows what Im thinking.
We follow a route I know, ending at the cell where he was held. Zak gazes through
the barred door briefly, at the empty space beyond. I never thought Id get out of
there, he says softly. I prayed for helpGod only knows what I did to deserve it,
but damned if he didnt send me an angel.
He looks at me, and I glance down at myself, noticing Im wearing white leather, a
girly version of his jacket and pants. Then I feel something move behind me. I turn
halfway and my face smacks intofeathers. White feathers. Oh my God, theyre
wings! I laugh out loud. What kind of crack is my brain on? Oram I sharing Zaks
dream again? Is this how he sees me? Oh, now this is embarrassing, I tell him.
Two can play this game! Its my dream too, dammit. I concentrate and stare at

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the space above and behind him, and the air shifts and fills with feathers. His are
iridescent black, like a crows wings, and they are beautiful. Youre my angel too,
I tell him. I never stood up for myself. If somebody dug a hole and threw me in,
there I stayed. Loving yousaving yousaved me too. You pulled me out of my
own hell.
He looks surprised, touched even, and moves forward and takes me in his arms. As
we kiss our wings fold around us, making a private little cocoon; the feathers
interlock and melt into silvery gray, like a fog, or the misty rain Zaks so fond of.
When we part, were outside, looking up at the decrepit old building through the
same mist. As we watch, cracks appear, and the place begins to crumble. We back
up, our hands joined, and the prison falls before us. Zak looks like the weight of the
world has been lifted from his soul. We look around then; were on top of a small
hill, and a motorcycle is sitting nearby, keys in it. As we start to climb on I catch
voices calling out our names. Down the hill I spot Nick, and Roni and little
Annabelle, and with them is another familiar figure. Aaron! Zak calls excitedly. He
revs the bike, I climb on behind him and hold on tight as we take off.::
I opened my eyes to Zaks only inches away. That must have been one hell of a
dream you were having, if all that smiling was any indication, he chuckled.
It was. It was about you.
I began to tell him about it, but I didnt get far. Fuck! he said with feeling. I
dreamed the same thing. Tell me this isnt gonna be a regular thing. I love you,
Claire, but a guy needs some privacy!
I dont think you need to worry, I said reflectively. Im no dream interpreter, but
this seemed more like a sign of something ending. The prison fell. Just a way of
saying thats over, youre free, and its time to move on.
Move on, he echoed with a firm nod. To find Aaron, and get on with my life. With
our lives. He eyed me lecherously. You were fuckin smokin in that leather, by
the way.
So were you, I shot back. Could you read my mind? Did you know what I was
thinking about?
He did, as it turned out, and proved it at length, till we both fell into a dreamless
sleep of satiated exhaustion.

14 Girlfriend, whats up with you?

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I glanced up from my computer screen at my best work friend. Ross stood with his
hip propped on the corner of my desk. Meaning?
Meaning youre glowing, girly. Very un-Monday, and lately, very un-Claire. In a
good way, of course. You were the same way all last week, if not more so. Whatd
you do that weekend, kick that worthless man of yours to the curb?
I giggled. Not exactly. But I cornered him and we had a littlewhat my uncle calls
a come to Jesus meeting. Got some things straightdispelled a few demons, if you
like. Basically we rebooted our relationship.
And this is a good thing?
This is a great thing, hon. Zaks opening up to me, and the person he really is
Im pretty sure I love him.
Hmph. Well see. Dont go overboard right away. He didnt sound like much of a
catch, from what youd told me before. If he jerks you around, Ill kick his ass. I
raised a skeptical eyebrow. Okay, okay, so Ill get Tris to kick his ass.
And Tristan would if you asked him to. Thats the thing, see? The way you and he
are, thats what happening now with Zak and me. It was a version of the truth
sanitized but essentially true, as evidenced by the smile I could not scrub off my
face.
Ross remained dubious but open, and more so over time. Im almost convinced,
he mock-grumbled a couple of days later. You talk more about your boyfriend than
I do about mine.
I was ignoring more of his good-natured teasing when I got a text from Zak. <walls
r closing in. gotta get the f outta here. Pickin u up 4 lunch>
<Bossy> I replied but added a smilie, to match the small secret smile on my face.
At least I thought it was secret, till Ross groaned.
Oh no. It must be him.
How do you figure?
A misspent youth watching reruns of The X Files. Youre smiling the exact smile
Scully always got when Mulder did something ridiculous but adorable.
I considered his logic while I got my purse and headed for the parking lot. Ive got
red hair, and Zak looks really hot in glasses, so, okay, Ill give you that one.

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Ross followed me out and we stood and chatted till I spotted Zaks Jeep pull in.
Thats him? he blinked. In that testosterone-mobile? The way you talked before,
I figured he was a major wuss.
Like I said, I grinned, I didnt exactly know him then. Later, darling. I hopped in
and kissed Zak quickly. His look was a compromiseId felt he should dress as the
demon had for the job at the film company, while he was all for his old baggy pants
and boots. We settled on neat jeans with the boots, and the dress shirt untucked,
sleeves rolled up, over a black t-shirt. With his glasses and spiky hair, he made
quite a tasty picture.
Over lunch, I asked, Howre things going? Have you heard from the network yet?
Nick has. They wont talk to me. Understandable, when you think about it. But
theyre agreed to meet with us both, at their headquarters in New York
tomorrow. At my widened eyes he grunted. I know, short notice. I think they
wanna see how serious we are.
I guess so, I sighed. Thisll be the first time weve been apart since
Zak nodded wordlessly. Reaching across the table, he took my hand in his and
kissed it. Well have to get used to it though, if this goes through and Nick and I
get back on the road. I agreed and he kept talking, his enthusiasm showing as he
described the reunion special they planned to pitch to the Travel Channel to get
their feet back in the door, and persuade the executives Zak was trustworthy. The
possession footage they planned to hold in reserve, as a last resort to convince
their audience; it wouldnt work with some of the suits who had never believed
their evidence to begin with.
Nick and Zak were flying out very early in the morning, so he dropped me at work
and went home to pack. Ross pouted that he hadnt gotten to inspect and
interrogate Zak in person, but I assured him Id arrange that. After I got home we
hit the sack, literally. Clearly Zak wanted some memories of lovemaking to sustain
him for the days hed likely be gone, and that didnt bother me a bit. We lay spent,
sweaty and happy afterwards, till he got up and padded across the bedroom. I
rolled onto his pillow and watched his bare butt appreciatively as he fumbled in his
jacket pocket and came back with a small bag that he opened and shook. Lying in
his palm like a sleeping baby snake was a curl of braided black leather. I got you
something, he said, almost shyly. It should be a diamond ring, I know, but AI
cant afford one good enough for you, just yet, and BIm kind of unconventional,
needless to say. So, uh, I hope you dont mind this. I liked it, and it reminded me of
you, strong and edgy and pleasing to the eye. I didnt want to leave without, um,

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you having something to symbolize what you mean to me, and what I want us to
mean to each other andoh fuck, Im rambling again. Will you marry me, Claire?
I picked up the braid, looped at one end and knotted at the other. Riveted to the
center was a small eight pointed star of blackened silver, and the rainbow fire
burning at its center was obviously a tiny diamond. Its beautiful! I said sincerely.
Id rather have this than a ring any day. And yes, you know I will marry you, any
damn time you like.
He fastened it around my wrist; it fit perfectly. Thats one thing I wanted to ask
you, thoughdo you mind if we wait a little while? Only until I can find Aaron, or do
my best to. I told you before, he and Nick are like the brothers that I never had,
and if at all possible I want them both at our wedding.
Of course. The demon had been wise enough not to cut Zaks blood family off
altogether; they meant too much to him, and reestablishing links with them had
been foremost on his agenda in recent days. The men who were nearly as close as
blood to him, though, could never be discounted. Actually, I was going to ask
something of you also. Could we wait long enough for me to try to make peace
with Uncle Bobby? Dad and I arent that close, so he, well, he means so much to
me. I want him to give me away, if theres any way I can make him understand
why I did what I did. Zak accepted that easily.
The next morning, obscenely early, I drove him to the airport to meet Nick. I hate
getting up at the ass crack of dawn, he complained. I hate flying. And I hate
being away from you.
Call me from the Statue of Liberty, I suggested and shoved him toward the
waiting skyway. Im jealous, Ive never been to New York and I always wanted to
go.
Well go on our honeymoon. Ill pick out a hotel! he yelled over his shoulder as
Nick dragged him away.
I had plans of my own while Zak was gone. For one thing, I scoured the internet for
fans of Ghost Adventures, and was surprised to find a sizable number of people still
following the show. I joined a couple of forums, and found word beginning to get
around about Zaks re-emergence. There were some rumbles and questions about
what had happened on the final GAC lockdown, but the predominant attitude
seemed to be pleased relief, at least among the serious fans, and vocal hopes for
new televised investigations. I also did some hunting around online in hopes of
finding leads to Aaron, but his twitter account and Facebook page, once smoking
hot according to fan reports, had lain dormant for months.

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Taking another tack, I asked Ross how one would go about finding a business
associate who had split town after a deal went bad. He had more access to the
department computer networks than I did, and with a little application of friendship
and chocolate, he promised to do some digging.
On Friday afternoon, I was contemplating the weekend, and trying to remember
what I had done with my weekends before Zak. It seemed like a million years in the
past. Heading back to my desk from an errand, I turned a corner and spied a
familiar form at the end of the hall. Zak looked as though he had stepped right off
the TV screen. I hurried to meet him, calling, Hey, babe! That didnt take long.
His grin was luminous. Were in! No more wage slavery for this guy. Travel bought
us for the reunion, and more after that if it flies. I yelped in delight and he picked
me up and swung me around, heedless of the amused looks of my co-workers.
Ross peered out of his cubicle with an intent glare, as though ready to break a vase
over someones head in my defense. I pulled Zak over to introduce him, and to his
credit Zak didnt miss a beat. I gave up some bullshit about how Zak and his
business partner had just closed a big account, and halfway thought it had passed,
till Zak left. HO-ly shit, girl! Ross hissed through his teeth. You DID know who
that was when you started dating him, didnt you? I blinked at him innocently.
Dont start with me! Thats that hot guy from the ghost hunting show, isnt it?
Oh, that. Well, actually, no, I didnt know then. He was really burnt outthat was
a lot of his problembut hes ready to get back into it nowCalm down, Ross,
youre about to drool on that paperwork. Ross calmed down, but still looked very
jealous. Save all that for Tris, sweetie.
With the support lined up, Zak and Nick finished salvaging their gear and began to
make a plan. They wanted to include as much of the Gamble House footage as
they could, and hoped to find some leads to Aarons whereabouts that they could
incorporate, along with visits to notable haunted sites along the way. They were
running into more brick walls, though, in the form of members of the paranormal
community who had once been their biggest supporters. Now, Zak could barely get
any of them to pick up when he called, and that left him frustrated and puzzled.
Nick could at least get conversation out of most of them, but no real leadsuntil
he talked to a woman named Patti Starr, leader of a ghost hunting group in
Kentucky. My jaw literally dropped when he came over to recount their exchange to
Zak and me.
Zak, you know how you said when you called her, she couldnt get off the phone
fast enough? I finally got her to tell me whyafter shed hemmed and hawed

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around, and asked me a bunch of questions about you. She talked to Aaron, about
three months ago. He knows you were possessed, or at least suspects it; he figured
it out. And he told Patti, and told her if you ever called she shouldnt talk to you
well, to what was in you. She said he told her Zaks gone, that wasnt him.
Kentucky. Okay, thats another lead. Zaks brain was almost visibly working. Did
she tell you any more?
No, and she wont either. I was able to halfway convince her, but shes still
suspicious. She wont say anything else, until she sees the videos; talks to you in
person, dudeshes a sensitive, rememberAND she wants to meet Claire.
Me? Why? I asked.
You were there, you did the exorcism, Nick replied with a shrug. I guess she
wants as much proof as she can get that this isnt some demon trying to fool both
you and me.
Okay. I started thinking of ways to prove someone wasnt possessed. I can get a
couple of days off. ill take a devils trap with meand how do you feel about the
taste of holy water, Zak?

15 I love to fly. Whether that makes me the best possible traveling companion for
Zak, or the worst, who knows. Its just a fact. I bounce like Tigger through check in,
and beam at the security checkers. As we prepared to catch our flight to Lexington,
I stepped it up in hopes of blunting the anxiety Zak admitted to feeling whenever
he flew. It seemed to help; he appeared fairly relaxed as we waited.
I was the one who was unnerved, when Nick pulled out a small video camera. Zak
began to talk to it, saying they were revisiting some of their old haunts to get
their sea legs back; then he introduced me as a friend and fellow investigator!
Um, I didnt know getting involved with you guys would get me on reality TV, I
said with an uncertain wave at the lens.
Probably wont, Zak said. But were filmmakers, we shoot everything. Nicks a
god in the editing room though, so nobody may ever know you were even here,
depending on how we decide to go. Hes probably already planning cuts and
splices.
From behind the camera, Nick grinned and nodded. The wheels are already
turning, he pronounced.

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Zak sniffed the air. I thought I smelled smoke. Those wheels are rusty, dude.
I laughed. Seriously though, am I going to be a problem for you? Gossip might
make it harder to get your fan base back. I bet half a dozen people are tweeting
right now about seeing Zak Bagans at the Vegas airport with Nick Groff and some
girl. Just then, our flight was called. Nick stowed his camera and Zak shouldered
his backpack; I grabbed my tote and started to reach for his hand, but hesitated.
Zak was having none of that. Let em, he said and grabbed my hand. They can
call me Charlie fuckin Brown if they want to. I got the little red haired girl, after
all.
As soon as we got into our seats, Zak pulled out his ipod and stuck his earbuds in.
I have to either block it all out, or distract myself, he explained to my quizzical
look.
I flipped down the tray table, and under its cover grabbed his thigh. I could
distract ya, I suggested. Yes, the man had utterly corrupted me.
His eyes were already half-closed, but they popped wide open. Dont you dare!
he yelped and actually blushed as he slammed the table back up into place. Nick
laughed so hard I asked if he needed to get past us to go to the bathroom. Zak
pretended to sulk, but when he was settled with his music, his hand closed around
mine again.
Nick was texting Roni. Im glad I got to spend time with then while you guys were
in New York, I told him. Theyre so great.
Yeah, she told me. She also told me if it wasnt for you, she probably would never
have let Zak back into our lives. I dont know what you told her, but it got through
in a way even the videos didnt.
I just told her the truth, I said sincerely. I hope the same applies with Patti Starr.
You guys need your network back, and from what Zak tells me she could be key to
that, to say nothing of what she knows about Aaron. Nick nodded, his dark eyes
grave. Speaking of truthabout Zak wanting to go public with what happened to
him
Yeah. He and I have had some words about that. But when he gets something in
his head
Its next to impossible to get it out. Tell me about it. But Nick, he read me the
notes hed written for the show, and hes still trying to take the blame! I cant let
him tell millions of people it was his fault the GAC broke up, when Ive busted my

76

ass to make him see it wasnt! My hand clenched around Zaks, and his fingers
twitched sleepily in my hold.
Well, if its the same text he read to me, it isnt so bad. He said he appreciated
what the network said and did to protect us, but that the viewers needed to know
the whole story: that during the Gamble house lockdown, he did an experiment
without proper research or prep, that it summoned a dark entity that he felt
overwhelmed him, and that Aaron and I got hurt as a result. I dont like that, but I
can live with it.
But what worries me, he continued, isweve got amazing evidence, better
than class A, but frankly Im scared to use it. Your uncle and your friends have
known about demons for years, and probably gotten major proof, but never made
it public, and now I think I understand why. People would still think theywewere
crazy or lying; or wed scare people shitless, or some dumbasses would try to
summon shit themselves. Im blurring out the symbols from the garret footage.
Theres enough of that going on already. This place, Bobby Mackeys, not far from
where were going: priests keep cleansing it and then some idiots go and invite shit
back in.
I saw those episodes, I said with a shiver.
Yeah, theres a reason they call it Hells Gate, Nick said darkly, then brightened.
Anyway, the direction the show goes is gonna depend a lot on Aaron. Once we
find him, if he can accept what happenedyoull be a big help there toothen he
and I can even things out for the show. I mean, if Zaks in front of the camera
saying what happened was his responsibility, but Aaron and I are right there to call
bullshit on him, then it wont have much impact, and we can move along.
While we talked, the plane had taken off, leveled out and headed east. I gingerly
slid an earbud out of Zaks ear and put it to mine, just out of curiosity; but instead
of the techno beat he favored, I was startled to hear my own voice speaking Latin.
You gotta be kidding me! I said aloud. Youre listening to my exorcism drills?
Damn, you are dedicated!
Zak stirred. One eye opened halfway, and its tranquil hazel gaze regarded me. I
want to learn this shit by heart, he murmured. Besides, listening to your voice
relaxes me.
That was so unexpected that instead of blowing it off with a teasing Aw!, I simply
kissed him, and felt his lips against mine curve into a small smile. Then I kicked up
the armrest between us, snuggled into his shoulder and closed my eyes to catch a
quick nap myself.

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The next thing I was aware of was being poked. Wake up, Claire. Were landing,
and youre drooling on my shirt, Zaks voice rumbled in my ear. Not a good look
for meeting somebody who thinks I might be possessed.
Eh, maybe Pattill just think youre an incubus, Zak, Nick jabbed as we deplaned.
I swatted him with my purse, but inwardly was delighted. Being pestered told me I
was accepted as part of their team.
+++
No lightness prevailed later, though, when a cab dropped us in front of the Ghost
Hunter Shop in Lexington. Nicks phone buzzed as we stood outside. Hi Patti,
yeah, we just got here. We started for the door, but Nick gestured for us to stop.
Um, okay, will do. He hung up. She wants me to come in, and you guys to wait
out here.
As he vanished through the door, Zak stared down at his feet. It wont let me go,
he said in a low, tight voice. Im free, but that fuckin demon still has so much it
stole from me. Am I gonna have to fight like this for every bit?
His hands hung at his sides, fists clenching, and I took them in mine. Some, yes,
Im sure. But you are a fighter, Zak. I knew that about you long before I really met
you. You fought so hard, when you were all alone and with so little hope. You arent
alone now. Dont give up.
He smiled wanly. I wont, sweetie. Just let me bitch a little now and then, okay?
I returned his smile, then moved away as the shop door reopened. Nick emerged,
accompanied by a tiny older woman, shorter than me even. Her hair was bright
blonde, and her clothing and jewelry bright, but her eyes were cool as she
scrutinized me. Staying with the guys initial idea, I introduced myself as just a
friend and colleague. Zak tried to reach out to greet her, but she moved away with
only a sideways look at him. As she led us inside, I could not miss his crestfallen
air; Patti Starr had been a dear friend, and understanding her caution, I was sure,
did not keep her coldness from hurting him.
We followed our guide through the small shop, pleasantly cluttered with everything
from equipment vests and EMF meters to candles, crystals and Tarot decks, to a
back office. Oddly, Patti seemed to relax as soon as we all entered the room. She
showed us to chairs and poured glasses of fragrant iced tea. All right then, she
said in her Kentucky accent, give me one reason why I ought to listen to yall.

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Zak took a big swig of tea. Because were telling the truth. And because, if you
dont, then when you find out were telling the truth, youll feel really stupid. And
youre not stupid, Patti.
Thats obvious, I agreed.
Her sharp eyes fixed on me. What makes you so sure of that, young lady? Youve
never set eyes on me in your life. You dont know me from Eves housecat.
No, but Ive watched you for several minutes, I replied. For one thing, you
havent looked Zak in the eye since we got here. Very wise if you think someone
might be a demon. And Ill eat my shoe if this tea doesnt have holy water in it.
And look where we are: far enough away to have a private conversation with
friends, but close enough for you to yell for backup if something nasty manifested.
No, youre definitely smart. Although Im surprised this room didnt have some kind
of warding. A salt line at the threshold or something. Of course, that would be kind
of obvious to a demon. Unless My eyes fell on the small throw rug just inside the
door. I set my glass down, rose and knelt beside it, flipping up a corner to find the
familiar inscribed outer circle of a devils trap hidden beneath. Hah, score one for
our side. No wonder you were less tense once Zak walked in here. I dont know if
Id have put it inside the room thoughthis is the only way out so if it caught
something youd be stuck in here. In my apartment, I put them in places I could
get around. I started to add that Zak and I had done the same in our place, but bit
my tongue. Fly under the radar, Claire! For now, let the world think youre just
another ghost hunter.
Puttin it farther out in the shop would put my employees and customers in
harms way, she returned, a new appreciation for me plain in her eyes. And I can
always climb out the window.
Zak regarded the tea in his glass. I drank holy water before. Remember, Nick, that
one time at Mackeys, I almost got hit by some dark bastard, and Bishop Long gave
me some? Tasted like ass. This stuffs great, though. Nick nodded, his camera
back in his free hand. So, what else do you need to believe Im me?
Patti still did not look directly at him, but she did finally address him. Nick tells me
theres video of, of you being possessed, and being exorcised. Seeins believin.
Lets see it.
That was my cue to pull out the laptop and set It up on the desk beside her. I let
Zak and Nick talk through the Gamble house footage, which turned out to be a
wise decision; for some reason, seeing the demon bind and gag Zak hit me almost
as hard as it had the first time. Dragging my eyes from the screen to look at him,

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sitting across the room all warm and lively and himself, was all that got me
through, and still I was shaky, and glad I was sitting down. That was the bad part
of the story, I said aloud, as much for myself as for Patti, as I cued the exorcism.
This is the good part.
I hadnt shown it to a total stranger before, so I was careful of what I told about
what I knew and how I knew it. Though Patti clearly knew some of it as well, she
was equally coy about where she had learned it. None of that seemed to matter,
though, as her eyes widened at the black eyes of the demon, the grip of the devils
trap on it, and the column of smoke that belched forth its ejection from Zaks body
onscreen. Since holy water had been mentioned, I pointed it out in the video, and
left the footage running with the audio up, so she could see Zak squirting it onto
his hands from the same bottle that had earlier burned the demon in him. Wait!
she said suddenly. What was that he said there?
I touched pause, review, and play again. Zaks voice came from the tiny computer
speaker. What the hells in this anyway?...Rosewater? Okay, whatever. Claire!
Come on, sweetheart, wake up
Yeah, that was odd, I said. I never figured it out, unless it was just the smell of
fresh water, compared to the caustic quality the holy water would have had to the
demon.
Pattis mouth was half open in an astonished O. No, she breathed. Roses! The
scent of rosesits associated with angelic apparitions. When she looked at me,
her eyes were bright with unshed tears. Maybe yall got more help than you
thought. She got up from her chair and crossed the room to where Zak had kept
his seat, not wanting to crowd or make her uneasy. Even standing, her head barely
topped his. She wrapped her arms around him. Oh honey, Im so sorry. If Id
knownif I couldve done anything to help you
I know, Patti. Its okay. Zak hugged her. Im just glad you believe me. Im glad to
have you back.
With the ice broken through, so to speak, things began to fly. Patti had spent
several days with Aaron when hed come to Kentucky. He told me all about that
last lockdown, how he and you, Nick, were attacked. But he never once said it was
Zak who did it. He said hed exhausted every halfway logical explanation, and all
he could conclude was that the being that attacked you was in Zaks body, but it
wasnt him.
Zak almost wept with relief when he heard that. Thank God, he knows it wasnt
me.

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So, whats he doing then? Nick wanted to know.

That Im not so sure of, Patti told him. Aaron seemed pretty sure it was a demon
that had Zak, but when I asked about an exorcism he said he didnt think that
would work; I dont know why he thought that, but he definitely had a plan in mind.
The thing that scared me is, when he left here, I asked where he was going and he
said wherever I have to, but for starters, Im going to Mackeys.
16 Mackeys? Zak burst out. What the fuckexcuse me, Pattibut that place is
dangerous for a team of fully equipped investigators. And Aaron hates the place. I
know, he always tried to say otherwise buthe just fuckinum, oh, screw itit
broke up his marriage, it messed with his head. He fuckin HATED it. Why was he
going there, alone??
I dont know, hon, Patti replied. He wasquieter than I remember him being,
morekeepin his own counsel. I asked why he had to go to that god-awful place,
why he couldnt have gotten a group up to go, or at least you, Nick; but all he said
was Nicks hurt, and hes got a family to take care of. That leaves me to do what
has to be done for Zak.
Both Zak and Nick were silent, absorbing what the older woman had said. That
makes sense with what he said the last time we talked, Nick said finally, when he
told me not to try to find you, Zak.
If hed figured I was possessed, youd think the first place hed go would be to
Bishop Long. Zak was clearly thinking out loud. I recalled him mentioning the
bishop who had worked with them on previous cases, an expert in the paranormal.
But he wasnt looking to get me exorcised, Patti?
No! And as for why, he wouldnt tell me that either. He just said he needed
answers, and Mackeys was one place he was going in hopes of findin em.
Then thats where we need to go, too, Zak said definitely.
Um, Nick began, Im not so sure about the we part, dude.
Zak opened his mouth, looking baffled; then his eyes flicked over to me and he
closed it. Yeah, of course. You and me, like the old days, huh?
Now my mouth flew open, furious that he thought Id be so easily left behind; but
Nick surprised me by beating me to the punch, with a totally different response. I
dont think thats such a good idea either, bro. You just got out from under a
demons thumb; you think its smart for you to walk up to the gate of hell and
tempt fate?

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What? Zak looked utterly dumbfounded now. IwhaNick, there might be a

pissed-off demon looking for him, and right now hes the only one of us who isnt
protected in some way or other. We cant afford to fuck around! Do you think Im
that weak?
No, I dont! But you werent weak when the fucker got you to begin with, either!
Nick retorted.
Youre sure as hell not going alone! Zak was building up a good head of steam,
and if I werent already angry, it would have been some good entertainment. And
were not asking any of Pattis people to go. What if the roles were reversed? What
if it were Aaron with me, and we were looking for you, and the trail led to Georgia
and somebody told us oh, Nick was here, and he just mentioned he thought hed
head over to Moon River Brewery? What do you think wed do? Nick sputtered at
the mention of a place where hed once been briefly possessed. Exactly. So thats
settled. Its getting late so well catch some sleep and head down to Wilder in the
morning. Claire, you
Will be heading out with you. I didnt even give him a chance to reply. Dont
give me some chivalry bullshit. Who got that demon out of you? Whos the only
one here whos actually been trained as a hunter, by hunters? You need me, Zak.
Do I look like a ditchable prom date to you?
This isnt your fight, sweetheart!
You love Aaron, and I love you. That makes it my fight. I moved across the room,
raising my right hand. Behind me I felt Nick shift, and even as mad as I was, it was
oddly reassuring to know if Id actually tried to hit Zak, his friend would have
probably been right on me. I had no such intention, of course. All I did was hold up
my wrist and call Zaks attention to the bracelet I wore. And do I need to remind
you of a certain plan we started, a promise we made to each other, and then put
on hold till you find your buddy, because you wanted him to be there? That also
makes this my business. He glared, and I met his fiery green eyes without flinch,
and a bit of my brain waved goodbye to the old me who would have meekly
accepted her disposition. A small laugh broke the silence, and I glanced over at
Patti, suddenly guilty. So much for flying under the radar, I said.
Its not exactly as if yall were doing that anyway, honey, she chuckled, her eyes
sparkling. You learned a lot from watchin me for just a few minutes, but that goes
both ways. It was pretty plain what you two were to each other from the minute
yall got out of that taxicab.

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Nick came over and took my arm, looking at the bracelet. That what passes for an
engagement ring nowadays? Damn, wish Id known that when I got married.
The only person whose opinion matters, Zak informed him loftily, is the person
wearing it.
Yeah, I added, and I love it. I pulled my arm away, pretending to growl in anger
at Nick and then sticking my tongue out at him. Again, goofing around had defused
a tense moment, and at least for a while, nobody spoke again of it.
+++
Why didnt you want me to know about you and Zak? Patti asked me later. We
were standing on the porch of her lovely old house, after she had fed us a delicious
Southern home cooked meal. Zak and Nick were out in her driveway with cameras
in hand, recording who knew what; their laughter carried faintly on the evening air
and made me smile.
Several reasons, I guess. I hadnt really thought about what being romantically
linked with a public figure meant, and I was trying to keep some privacy. And II
was afraid if you knew, you wouldnt believe us about Zak being okay; you might
think the demon had tricked me, somehow, brainwashed me, whatever.
Oh, I got enough evidence to know yall were tellin the truth, Patti smiled. And
as far as the other goes: I dont think a demon can love, or even pretend to, and
the way Zak was lookin at you while you were showin me the exorcismoh yeah,
honey. That boy loves you. Yall two need to stick togetheryoure wise not to let
him go off and leave you. If you separate, II feel like it wont be good.
I held the sensitives words close to my heart, particularly the next day, when our
rental car stopped in front of a rough-looking old building of corrugated metal on a
lonely side road. Claire, Zak tried again, I dont want to be worrying about you
when I should be concentrating on this place. The spirits here arent for playing
with.
So, I suggest you try not worrying about me. I think I can take care of myself. I
got out of the car and approached a man who came out of the honky-tonk. The
guys scrambled out behind me, so as not to get left behind themselves.
The welcome committee turned out to be a man they knew from their earlier visits,
and the first thing he said was Now Mackeys got back all three of yall. Ol Aaron,
he was here a while back. Upon further questioning, the man explained he had

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answered Aarons queries about recent paranormal activity, done a walkaround of

the place with him, then left him here when the bar closed for the night.
Zak literally blanched at the last bit of information. Hehe did a lockdown here,
alone?
Didnt stay the whole night through. He called me up a few hours later, said hed
gotten all he could. I come back an let im out, and he went on his way.
We talked with several other employees of the bar, but got no more substantive
reports than that. We should stay the night, Zak said, but we didnt exactly
come prepared for a lockdown Nick stopped him with one upraised finger,
walked back to the car and dug into a duffel bag hed left on the back seat. In
moments, he was back, loaded down with EMF meter, thermometer, various hightech cameras, and even an Ovilus, that amazing little gadget that provides words
for ghosts to speak. Zak just shook his head and laughed.
There was no laughing that night, though, as we hunkered down in the drafty old
building. It even felt haunted; the air was still, heavy and tight, occasionally
disrupted by an impossibly chill breeze. I kept an iron grip on my composure,
determined not to distract Zak or make him regret my being here. The guys took
photos of strange balls of light, invisible to the naked eye, and called out to spirits
with video cameras and digital audio recorders running, but got no intelligible
results.
The basement, the reported location of the hells gate, we avoided. Despite Zaks
argument that we were all protected by Sams sigils from possession, Nick refused
to take any chances. We did, however, ascend to the upper level, where the spirit
of a woman named Johanna supposedly grieved for her singer boyfriend killed by
her father. No ghostly voices offered to communicate there either, though both Zak
and Nick attempted to make contact.
Hey, let me try, I said and reached for the Ovilus. Maybe shed like to talk to
another girl for a change. Hello? Johanna? Are you here? My name is Claire.
Inspired by a sudden idea, I went on, Im here with Zak and Nick, and we could
use your help. Were looking for their friend Aaron, and we know he was here
recently and stayed a while. I wondered if he spoke with youif you remember
anything he said that might help us find him. I stepped forward into the pitch
blackness of the upstairs room, past the guys with their night-vision cameras; but I
could sense them at my back. I reached backward briefly, and Zaks hand found
mine. Darn, nothing

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The Ovilus in my hand burped. SEARCH, it said, and I practically squealed with
delight.
Yes! Thats right, were searching for Aaron. We think hes searching for
something too. Do you have any idea what?
Whoa, Nick said from around my right shoulder. Did you guys feel that cold just
then? Somethings definitely here.
KILL, said the device.
Zaks hand clenched on mine. Thats it, youre getting out of here.
In response I pulled my hand free. We dont want anybody to get killed, Johanna!
Well, except for one son of a bitch of a demon, but thats another story.
FREE.
Um, okay. I dont understand that though. Can you tell me any more?
COLT.
Kentucky is horse country, Zak noted. Dont know what relevance that would
have here, though.
Me neither, I agreed. But whoever is answering did see Aaron here, apparently;
does know he was searching for something; and knows its a matter of life and
death. So we have that much knowledge we didnt have before. I wonder why it
talked to me and not you two though.
A puff of cool air moved across my face, curled around my cheek, and breathed a
word into my ear. I let out a little screech, jerked around to face that directionand
then laughed. Call me hysterical, but it was all suddenly pleasant and funny. Im
sorry, Johanna! I didnt mean to yell. You just startled me, thats all. I see what
youre getting at. I guess youd know, too, after what you went through losing your
lover. Im so sorry about that, too, I said sincerely, and felt a twinge of sadness for
her. I held out my free right hand, shaky but resolute, and gasped as the coolness
brushed across my palm, and unbelievably, around the bracelet on my wrist.
Youre the second person in two days whos pointed out to me that this whole
flying under the radar thing just is not working, I chuckled. From nearby I heard
Zak and Nick talking excitedly and fiddling with equipment, but for the moment my
focus was on the person with whom I was speaking, invisible yet undeniably there.
Maybe once we get this mess straightened out, I can come back and we can talk
some more, if youre available. Okay?

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The presence faded. I jumped at another touch but it was only Zaks hands on my
shoulders. Lets get back down to base, NOW, he growled. Once we returned to
the area wed set up, he sat me down and demanded, Okay, just what the fuck
went on up there?
You heard most of it. I handed the Ovilus back to Nick and described the last
moments, when I felt Id actually made contact with the spirit.
Nick checked their video and audio, but found no voice. That really confirms it was
likely an actual spirit voice thoughif itd been a person, the recorders wouldve
picked it up.
So? Zak said. What did she say to you?
Remember, I said I wondered why she talked to me and not you or Nick? I think
she was answering meshe said love. I grinned at Zak. I think maybe Johanna
sensed a kindred spirit in me, so to speak.

17 We pulled into a Sonic as the sun rose, still talking over the events of the night.
Zak wondered aloud why none of the more aggressive entities they usually
encountered at Mackeys had emerged to confront us. I didnt particularly care. My
first experience meeting a deceased spirit had been absolutely exhilarating. As we
munched our tater tots, Nick perused the map hed found in the rental cars glove
box. Im trying to trace Aarons route. Patti saw him a couple of weeks after
Claires friend met him in Kansasand its a pretty straight shot from Salina to
Lexington. He spread the map out across the steering wheel and traced a line
with his finger. I hung over the back seat to watch. Looks like about 700 miles.
Easy two day drive.
Zak matched his friends grin. You thinking what Im thinking? Check out the town,
see if we can find out why Aaron was there, and where else he may have been
headed. Road trip! His face suddenly fell as he looked up at me from his shotgun
seat. Youd have to fly back to Vegas alone, though, he said to me.
Says who? I retorted. Nick said two days. Today is Thursday, and Im not
expected back at work till Monday. You do the math. Unless youd rather I left.
Seriously, I came because Patti asked me to, but Ive done my job. If youd be more
comfortable without me tagging along, I understand.
I worry about you, Zak admitted, but you held your own at Mackeys. We may
make an investigator out of you yet.

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And she can hold a camera, Nick put in. I say we hire her, as a temp.
Done, Zak agreed. He leaned over to scrutinize the map, and his eyes narrowed.
Wed pass through Stull on the way, wouldnt we?
His tone was deceptively casual, but Nick caught his drift immediately. Dont even
think about it. Bad enough you went into Mackeys. I am not letting you back in
that house where we all nearly got
Zak held up his hands, bare except for a half-eaten breakfast burrito. Dude! Do
you see me holding any demonic summoning runes? I was that stupid once, but its
not gonna happen again. Besides, Im not risking His voice trailed off, but he
gave a significant tilt of his head toward me. I let it pass. It was irritating that Zak
still felt he had to protect me, but I was in accord with Nick: if Zak thinking he had
to shield me kept him out of harms way, so much the better.
We drove back to Lexington to check out of our hotel and say goodbye to Patti,
who had already begun a round of phone calls and text messages to the same
network of ghost hunters she had earlier warned away from Zak, telling them now
that he was safe. She too was baffled by the relative ease of our night at Bobby
Mackeys, but was inclined to write it off to chance, or lack of preparedness on the
spirits part. Yall didnt even know you were staying when you got there, so
maybe they didnt have time to round up a bunch to mess with you.
After I ordered a stop at Target to pick up some clean underwear (for everybody.
Wed all only packed for a short trip, and no way was I riding for two days in a car
with two stinky men, no matter how much I liked or loved them) we headed off
across Kentucky. Fatigue hit me, and while the guys talked and plotted I snoozed
away the rest of the morning in the back seat. I was awakened by the stopping of
the car, and something cold thrust into my hand. Um, thanks, I mumbled and
focused on the can. Diet Cherry Coke. I took a big swallowId gotten drier than I
thought while asleepand grinned up at Zak in gratitude mingled with
puzzlement. Howd you know this is my favorite? I dont remember ever telling
you.
He shrugged and took a slug from the bottle of Muscle Milk in his hand. You ever
tell the demon? I probably heard it then. That made sense, though it was the first
time Zak had mentioned recalling anything from that dark time, and it made me
wonder how much else might come back to him later.
After Nick gassed up we all went into the little market, discovered a snack bar in
back, and gorged on thick-cut fried bologna sandwiches and homemade potato
chips. When we piled back into the car I insisted on spelling Nick, driving in my

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usual manner, with one hand on the wheel and the other on the radio knob. Zaks
ipod earbuds were still planted firmly in his ears, but he took them out occasionally
to see what Id found. Its more fun than playing roulette, he said dryly after Id
jumped from Emmylou Harris to the Rolling Stones to Usher. And you dont lose
money, just brain cells, he added when I landed on a pop station and stayed to
hear Selena Gomez. I gave him a finger and then sang I Love You like a Love Song
loudly straight to his face.
That started a round of singing along with some of the goofiest songs we could find
on the stations that faded in and out as we drove. In the middle of an old duet
between Jackson Browne and Clarence Clemons, though, Zaks grin turned wistful.
This is where Aaron would play air sax, he said.
Nick nodded quietly. You both miss him a lot, I said.
We need him, Zak replied. Things just wont be the same if we cant get him
back. The three of uswe just clicked. I took point, most of the time, but I always
knew Nick and Aaron had my back.
I listened as they reminisced, and pondered after they both dozed off. Driving long
distances gives you plenty of time to think, and as I did, I made a resolution. I
remembered Nicks fierce joy when he and Zak were reunited, and made a promise
to myself that I would do all I could to help them complete their triad and find their
friend.
We reached St Louis in late afternoon. Nick pulled out this amazing address list and
made some calls. I worried secretly about how Pattis update might have been
received, but I neednt have. Before I knew it we were met by a welcoming
committee of ghost hunters who escorted us to the Italian Hill area of town and
stuffed us with rigatoni and red wine at a restaurant in an old house they informed
us was even haunted. We chose it just for you guys, they said proudly. Despite
the wine I managed not to giggle. I was, after all, now an official member of the
Ghost Adventures Crew, even if only a temp. We were peppered with questions
well, Zak and Nick were, mostly, but I came in for a few too, primarily from the
female members of the group. Our story was rehearsed and firmly in place,
though, and after all, most of it was true, or close enough.
The local paranormal group had information of their own to offer ustwo members
had been in touch with Aaron, in the time period between Deans meeting him and
Pattis. In fact, the couple had even asked him to come with them on a ghost hunt
to a local mansion, but gotten a strange reply. He said he appreciated us asking,
but he had bigger fish to fry than the ghost of an old dead governor, they said.

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That doesnt sound right, Zak said as we went back to our motel and readied for
bed. When Aaron started out with us he spooked so easily, but later on he was as
tough as they camehe pretended to hate going alone into haunted places, but he
was a real warrior. The meaner the spirit, the better he liked facing it.
But that makes even more sense, I argued. Patti said Aaron was totally focused
on helping youhe knew you were possessed and he was searching for a way to
free you. In fact, remember Johanna said free, and maybe thats what she meant;
maybe Aaron is going to haunted places, asking the spirits there for help or
information on how to get rid of the demon.
Zak didnt look convinced. If so hes being really selective about which ghosts
hes asking for advice.
The next morning we set out again. Zak persuaded Nick to at least get off the
interstate at Stull, just past Kansas City, in the early afternoon. Hey, look, he said
as we drove through the small town, wasnt that the cop that locked us in, that
night?
I think so. Despite his earlier concerns, Nicks camera lay close at hand, and he
started shooting as he pulled the car up and the guys began to chat with the
officer. It started as an exchange of pleasantries and recollections, but moments
later took a shocking turn.
Not all that surprised to see you fellas back here, said the sturdy, graying man in
uniform. Your buddy came back a few months ago, even went back to the old
Gamble place. Brave or crazy, not altogether sure which
What?? Zak yelped. What the fuck was he thinking? Nick stood with mouth
agape as Zak looked around him almost wildly, and then stepped back toward our
car. We need to go over there.
Zak, no Nick began.
Nick, Ive got to go! Zak almost yelled. Whatever Aarons doing, hes trying to
help me! If you dont want to, okay, fine. But I cantI wont let him get fucked
because he thinks Im in trouble. Ill get the cop to take me down there, Ill walk
through, do some EVP sessions. Its broad daylight, theres probably nothing there
anyway. So you stay here with Claire and Ill be back in a
As if youre going without me, I snapped. Reaching through the open door into
Nicks duffel lying on the back seat, my fingers closed on the familiar shape of the

89

Ovilus and I pulled it out. Lets roll, I told Zak, locking eyes with him and refusing
to back down.
Nick looked from me to Zak to the baffled patrolman, then threw up his hands.
Get in the fuckin car, he ordered, and took off with a squeal of tires following the
police car outside of town and up a narrow graveled road. At its end, with a small
cemetery just visible on a nearby hill, sat a lonely house, its shingles torn loose
and ragged.
Nick stopped the car and sat gripping the wheel, his knuckles white. Zak stared at
the building as though compelled, but when he spoke his voice was calm. You
dont have to go in, bro.
Like hell, Nick growled and grabbed his camera as he got out. Hes my buddy
too. The look that passed between them spoke volumes, and for a moment I felt
out of place, until I remembered Pattis words to me: youre wise not to let him go
off and leave you. If you separate, I feel like it wont be good. I took a firmer grip
on the spirit communication device and moved with them toward the front door.
The police officer had radioed and gotten permission for us to enter and film, but
he refused to leave his patrol car. Cautiously we entered and began to walk
through. I looked down at my hands. Oh shit, I said, this isnt the Ovilus. What is
it?
The spirit box, Zak said, taking it from me. It uses radio frequencies to facilitate
spirit communication. He fiddled with it for a few moments, and it began to emit
static and white noise. Is anybody here? he called. Do you remember us? Nick
and I were here, two years ago. We talked with some spirits here, and you told us
you were murdered. Can you talk to us again? He pulled his tiny digital recorder
out of his pocket and activated it as we continued through the house, staying close
together. Our friend was here not long agodid you talk to him? Did he ask you
questions? What did he ask you? Did he ask about a demon that was in this
house?
Suddenly, from the chaotic noise of the spirit box in my hand, a clear voice
emerged. IT BURNS.
Whoa! Zak said. We all stopped. It burns. Yeah, it probably does. My legs went
weak, but I forced myself to stiffen. Its back in hell, and its angry, so, yeah, it
probably does. Did you tell Aaron that?
No reply came, at least nothing we could hear. After a few minutes, though, we
paused, and Zak reviewed the recording. At one point, a faint scratching could be

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heard. I hear a voice there, Nick said. Whats it sayingsounds like we fear it.
That makes sense, if the demon in the boarder killed the family here.
We moved through the rooms and upward, till the guys halted at the foot of a
small, narrow staircase. Zak gazed upward, and shivered. I slipped my arm around
his waist. Enough, I told him gently. Youve made your point. We know Aaron
was here; we know he talked to the spirits here, about the demon that was in you.
Lets go.
Wait here, you two, he said, never taking his eyes off the door at the top of the
stairs as he slid free of my touch and started walking up toward the garret door. I
cried out and ran up after him, but he turned and stopped me. Dont, Claire. I
need to do this. If I leave now, this place is gonna keep haunting me. I need to go
in that room. I need to see theres nothing there. Please.
This time when our eyes met, I did back down, literally, stepping backward down
several stairs to the landing. Yell if you need us, or you get anything, Nick said
from behind me, in a tone that would not take no for an answer. Zaks eyes left
mine to look at him, and he nodded once before he turned away.
I felt Nicks hand on my shoulder. How do we always end up like this? I
murmured. You and me, hanging on to each other for support, while he goes and
does something crazy.
Partly, its because I dont have Aaron here to hang on to, he replied quietly.
I smiled faintly. So the temp will do? Zak had thankfully left the door open, and
we could see him move around the small room with recorder in hand, and hear him
talking to any entity that might be near.
The temps not Aaron, but the temps good.
Hey guys, look! Zaks voice, pitched down toward us, was not frantic, but
interested. As we started up the steps, though, the door began to swing shut, and I
panicked. I dove forward and blocked it with my body, wincing at the bruise I knew
Id have on my butt tomorrow.
Zak was standing from a squat in a corner, holding a wrinkled piece of paper. I
recognized it, and it chilled me. The summoning sigils, I got out. Has that lain
here all this time?
No, Nick sounded certain. Billy said he cleaned everything up, remember? You
dont think Aaron

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Fuck, I hope not, Zak said fervently. The chill in my bones deepened; I felt
physically dizzy, but didnt realize Id swayed till Nicks hand steadied me. Claire?
You okay, sweetie?
Yeah, I forced out. Justnervous, maybe
Dude! Nick said suddenly. Feel that cold!
I shuddered, and Zak pulled me into his arms. Is something here? he yelled. Do
we meet again, you demonic sonovabitch? Are you pissed off, because youre such
a fuckin failure? You tried to take me and you failed. And you cant get me again,
so youre trying to take it out on her? Well, fuck you! Get away from her!
The spirit box I still clutched produced a low, long noise like a big cats growl, and
then words: FOR HIM
Who? I demanded through lips gone cold. For him? For who? Zak? Or Aaron?
Who?
One more word burst forth, clear to all three of us, and emphatic in its delivery.
MINE!
No! I yelled back. Not yours. You cant have him, motherfucker! Anger dispelled
a little of the cold that gripped me, and I pulled Zak back toward the door. For once
he didnt argue, and we quickly retreated through the house and outside.
I collapsed in the back seat shaking unashamedly. Zak dropped beside me and
slammed the car door. Just drive, he told Nick. Ill stay back here with her.
Fine. Nick had already regained some of his usual composure. But if you get
carsick back there, you get to explain it to the rental company. Zak flapped a
hand at him and we took off, Nick calling thanks to the policeman as we passed.
I held Zak tightly. It cant have you. I wont let it. I wont.
It cant, he soothed me, pulling me half into his lap and touching his shoulder,
where under his shirt the sigil of protection was etched into his living flesh. It
cant get me, and that is because of you, sweetheart.
The farther we got from the house, the calmer and clearer my head became, and I
knew he was right. In this tug of war, if my demonic foe wanted Zak back, it had
already lost. My secret worry, though, was that it hadnt been talking about Zak.
Maybe it wanted new prey.

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Maybe it wanted Aaron.

18 My concern for Aaron lasted a few minutes, till Zak suddenly said Ow! and
reached for his side. He shifted away from me and pulled up his t-shirt, and I
gasped at the sight of three parallel scratches, long and bloody, that scored his
skin. Did I do that? I asked guiltily.
His answering look was grim. No, the demon did.
Nick glanced in the rear view mirror and swore. He jerked the wheel and slammed
on the brakes, stopping the rental car on the shoulder of the dusty, narrow road,
and twisted around in the seat to look back. Dude! It marked you.
We need to get the fuck out of Kansas, I said. Wait, let me rephrase that: we
need to get Zak the fuck out of Kansas.
No! Zak snapped and flung the car door open as though to storm off. Nick and I
jumped out too, headed him off and blocked him against the side of the car so I
could examine the scratches in the late afternoon sunlight. Thats what these
bullies want, he argued. They want to make you run, make you panic and screw
up. Im protected from possession. All three of us are. And we need to find out as
much as we can about what Aaron did here, who, if you recall, is NOT protected. I
am not running from it.
I didnt waste breath arguing; short of throwing a sack over Zaks head and bodily
dragging him back to Vegas, there wasnt much chance when he got that stubborn
look. And he was right; he was shielded. It was plain how Nick was torn, though; he
had one friend right here and in possible danger, and another far away and in
possible danger. Finally, he threw up his hands. Okay. We stay. So lets get to work
and figure out where the fuck Aaron is. For starters, before we leave Stull, lets
stop off at the police station. Maybe he talked to more cops than just the one.
It was a great idea. From the local chief we learned that Aaron had not only come
there and gone through the Gamble files, the same ones the Ghost Adventures
crew had used in their ill-fated lockdown, but he had asked for copies of several
pages, including the original drawings of the sigils of summoning, sketched by a
police artist directly from the ones painted in red ink on the garret wall in 1952.
When we looked at them in the file, I glanced once and had to look away; they
seemed to pulse with evil. My eyes met Zaks, as wide and horrified as mine. Do
they look like snakes to you? he whispered. Squirming around on the pageew.

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What the FUCK was Aaron trying to do? Zak nearly exploded later. By the time
we talked to some locals and found Aaron had actually spent several days in Stull,
the afternoon was almost gone. All three of us were exhausted, and we decided to
stay the night at the towns one motel, the same place Aaron had stayed. The
manager even gave Zak and me the same room Aaron had used; we searched it
thoroughly as soon as we got inside, but it took a few minutes before Zak spotted
some telltale smudges, roughly circular, on the ceiling just inside the door. A
devils trap, he said in disbelief. He wiped it off before he left, but he put a fuckin
devils trap up there. Like he expected something to come here, to come after him.
What the FUCK?
None of us had a solid theory, but we talked it over as we slumped wearily over a
bag of burgers. If Aaron took the summoning symbols to the house, Nick mused,
and then stuck around town, then yeah, its almost like he thought whatever he
was calling would take a while to get here. But that makes no senseduring the
lockdown, and today, something responded within minutes.
But at the time he was here, the demon was still in Zaks body, I pointed out.
Did he think using the sigils might pull it out?
Could be, Zak agreed around a mouthful of French fries. Then when it didnt, he
concluded exorcism wouldnt work? That could explain what he told Patti, because
he went to Kentucky after he was here.
After we cleared supper away, Nick pulled out gear and began to review the
footage he had shot at the Gamble house. To be honest, Id barely even realized he
was rolling until much later. While he put his earphones in and took a first scan
through, I pulled Zak aside and got out the alcohol and cotton balls Id borrowed at
the front desk. Ill clean em in the shower, he protested as I swabbed the
scratches. Ow! Fuck, that hurts worse than getting scratched did.
Pipe down, Otis, I told him, and blew on the wounds to cool the sting of the
alcohol. I also, though I did not call attention to it, breathed a little prayer over
them. I hadnt been raised in an extremely religious household, but if Patti was
right and our plight had attracted divine notice, Id beg for all the help I could get
to keep Zak safe.
When we rejoined Nick, he had already identified several possible EVPs we hadnt
heard with our own ears in the house. The three of us gathered around the laptop.
A couple sounded like nothing but static to me, but another was a startlingly clear
womans voice saying its here. I sat on my hands to keep them from shaking.

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I cant tell what this last one saysits in the garret, Nick said as he cued up the
last spot. He sounded reluctant, and I suspected hed noticed my discomfort
despite my efforts to hide it. On the computer screen I saw Zak and myself, heard
FOR HIM, and then something else, spoken in virtually the same voice but lower.
Its got an I sound at first. By? Sigh? Guy?
He replayed several times while we listened intently. High? Zak guessed. Or hi?
The last parts got an ish, or itchvery emphatic. Nick played the clip one more
time, and Zak suddenly gasped aloud. Hi, BITCH, he said.
I was abruptly and uncomfortably aware of Zaks eyes under the bill of his black
baseball cap turning toward me. No way, I countered. Why would a demon say
that? If its, pardon the expression, our demon, it had me around for months. Why
would it even want to say anything to me now? It sure didnt show much interest
then. I kept arguing, mostly so the guys wouldnt feel they had to drop their
search for their missing friend out of some misguided need to protect mebecause
I thought Zak was fairly close on what the voice said, just not in who it was aimed
at, or why.
When I wouldnt back down, Nick sighed and packed up the gear. Maybe youre
right, Claire. It could be an artifact. Or we could all just be so fuckin tired and
freaked out that were hearing stuff thats not there.
We said good night as he left for his room next door, but Zak followed him out and
I groaned inwardly. There was gonna be one of those guy talks happening out in
the parking lot, I just knew it, and when Zak came back into our room I was loaded
for bear. I didnt get a chance to say a word, though. The instant the door closed
behind him, he was on me, pulling me to him and kissing me ferociously. His mouth
was hard and hungry, and his hands crawled under my shirt. Zak? I sputtered.
Zak, whathold on, HOLD ON! I pushed him away. I seem to remember you
promised me, on your knees, one time, you would never force yourself on me!
Im not! His fair cheeks were flushed, and he was breathing heavily.
Then what the hell is going on with you? I demanded.
II lied a little about what I heard in that last EVP. It wasnt hi, bitch. It was MY
bitch.
I know.

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You know? Now it was his turn to sputter. Then whyClaire, there were only
three people in that room, and clearly youre the only one who qualifies for that
particular insult
Am I? Think, Zak. When you were possessed, where were you? I mean, you
perceived yourself as being where? A prison, right? I didnt want to bring it up with
Nick here, because I didnt know how much youd told him. But when guys in a
prison use that term, they usually mean one thing. His eyes widened. You asked
me this once, and God, I dont want to ask it of you, butdid it everwell, did it
make you feel like it wassexually assaulting you?
The longest half-second of my life passed before he blinked and said, No. It
taunted me, a lot, but it never followed through. I always figured it wanted to keep
something in reserve to threaten me with.
I breathed a sigh of relief. Zaks torture hadnt been physical, but it was no less real
for that. As the tension that carried me lessened, I sat on the bed. Empty threats
now, where both of us are concerned.
Not altogether, Zak paced around. It could possess anybodyyour best friend,
the guy in line behind you at the store. I still think its after you, sweetheart.
Promise me youll be careful.
Im not the one who got scratched, I reminded him. Sit down, youre making me
dizzy AND horny.
He halted. My pacing makes you horny? Thats good to know.
No, you jump started that when you stuck your tongue down my throat a minute
ago. What, was all that a testosterone reaction to thinking that a demon might
want back in my pants? A demon that was one shitty lay, you may recall.
Pretty much a testosterone thing, Zak admitted and finally sat down beside me.
His eyes held mine, fierce, shading toward blue against the dark of his cap. I
would die or kill before I let that piece of shit get hold of you again, he said, softly
and vehemently. Youre mine, dammit. Mine.
Normally I would have quibbled at being declared property; but Zak had held his
emotions tightly reined in for so long. And some of you may disagree with me,
thats fine, but I have to think if your man is gonna snap under a strain like that,
its best that he snap in the direction of clothes flying, legs over head, pillow biting,
sheet tearing sex. So when his mouth hit mine again, hot and demanding, I went
with it.

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Okay, I didnt tear the sheets. They were somebody elses, after all.
+++
Saturday started off with some tension left over. The ride to Salina was quiet. I
inadvertently dispelled a lot of it at the local police station, when I got an idea, and
took the chief aside for a little of what Uncle Bobby often calls the hunter shuck
and jive. I showed him my LVPD ID, along with a nice line of bull about how we
werent allowed to use our real badges outside town, and explained quietly that
Aaron might be in danger, stalked by a lunatic obsessed with demons (yes, I said
it while making air quotes with my fingers) So I asked for any help he could give us
in finding where Aaron had been and what hed been doing, so we could track him
down faster.
My scam bore fruit almost before Zak and Nick could stop laughing. It turned out
Aaron had spent a lot of time in a lot of libraries, from Kansas to California to
Oregon, and in all of them he had been researching demons. Specifically, he had
requested a lot of very old material on how to kill demons. That made sense, but it
brought us no closer to finding him than the messages Nick periodically left on his
voice mail.
We drove back to Kansas City and caught a flight home to Vegas, where I promptly
returned a message of my own. Ross had left me a voice mail on Wednesday
afternoon, while we were at Bobby Mackeys, saying hed gotten some info on
Aaron, but I hadnt been able to connect with him. When I did, he said, I got some
hits on your boy from the violators database.
The what? Youre kidding. Aaron broke some law someplace?
Calm down, girlfriend. Nobody caught him molesting donkeys or anything. CHP
pulled him over in Cali speeding. Hes on that ghost show with your Mister Hottie,
right? Well, apparently the highway patrol girl recognized him and let him go with a
warning. He sounded like he couldnt decide whether to be appalled or amused.
Dismount your high horse, Ross, I teased. If you were writing tickets and you
pulled Shemar Moore over, youd probably do the same darn thing, and do not lie
to me and say you wouldnt.
Hey, everybodys entitled to a fantasy life! he protested. Tris and I have an
understanding. We only have permission to cheat IF I get a chance at Shemar, or
he gets a shot at this cute thing that used to be on Days of our Lives. But enough
about our love lives. The other ping I got was in southern Wyoming. A state trooper
found your fella in his car on the side of the road in the middle of Bumfuck Egypt

97

and stopped to check. Told the cop he was fine, just got tired and pulled off to rest,
end of story.
I got particulars on location and time. The speeding ticket was issued on California
Highway 99, between Sacramento and Stockton, I told Zak while Nick spread out
the map hed brought back from our road trip, marked with Aarons known stops,
and added this to the xs. What could he have been doing there?
They studied the map and debated for a while. There seemed to be no pattern,
until Zak suddenly said, Shit! Look what its near, Nick. Remember? We drove that
same route going to
Preston Castle, Nick finished, and they exchanged a look of complete
understanding and shock. I made a clue me in noise. It was one of our early
investigations, Nick told me. Zak channeled a ghost there; the spirit of a
murdered woman spoke through him.
And now it all makes sense. Zak shook his head. Damn him! Preston Castle,
Mackeys, the Gamble househes been going to places where Id been possessed.
He wont fuckin call Nick back, so he doesnt know Im okay. Hes still trying to
figure out a way to get me out. He sounded both angered and deeply moved. I
knew I was.
But Wyoming doesnt fit, Nick pointed out. Weve never even been on an
investigation there. Why did he go there?
We couldnt come up with an answer to that one, but as it happened, we didnt
have to wait very long. A few days later, Nick came over to help Zak and me move
some of my furniture out of my apartment into a rental truck and haul it to a
storage unit (next to Nicks, which Id started calling the Unofficial Ghost
Adventures Office in Exile). As we stopped for a break, and I rescued my water
bottle from Zak who was about to dump it over Nicks head, Nicks phone rang. He
dodged Zaks attempt to tackle him and answered it. Hi Roni! Zak hollered,
deciding at the same time to tackle me instead and spread his sweat all over me.
My mouth was open to shout hi to Roni too, until Nicks eyes bulged and his jaw
dropped. For one instant my heart stopped, my first thought whats wrong with
Annabelle?
Then Nick yelled into the phone, AARON! Where the FUCKIN HELL have you been,
dude?

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19 A couple of hours later, I sat on the back bumper of Zaks Jeep nervously
playing with my bracelet. Zak paced in the parking lot. Nick had pulled some
folding chairs out of his storage unit, but he was the only one using them. For
cryin out loud, Zak, sit down. Whats your problem?
Zak flung himself down in one chair with an alarming squeak of metal. How long
did Aaron say hed be? he asked, twisting the rings on his fingers. Maybe he
changed his mind. Maybe hes not sure Im okay after all.
Nick rolled his eyes. As he started to explain yet again that Aaron had called from
somewhere around the Utah state line and so would be a while getting here, a red
SUV pulled into the lot. A tall man got out from behind the wheel, his shaven head
slightly sweaty in the afternoon heat. The mouth above his goatee split into a grin
when he looked our way. Hey, fellas! he called. Nick rushed over and gave him a
big back-slapping hug. Zak moved more cautiously, hand outstretched, till Aaron
clasped it with a hearty Good to see ya. Then his eyes moved toward me. Well,
hel-LO there, he said brightly as the three men approached me. What, you guys
already replaced me with a prettier model?
No, no, I laughed. Im just the temp.
Zak slipped his arm around my waist. This is Claire, he said simply. She saved
me.
Aaron eyed me appreciatively. I bet she did. You know Im gonna have to hear all
about this.
And were gonna hear all about you! Nick burst out. Where the fuck have you
been, dude? All you said was here and there. What kind of fuckin answer is that?
Ive been trying to reach you for three weeks or more.
Sorry, man, Aaron shrugged. Shit happens, you know? I didnt have any idea
Zak was demon-free till you told me a little while ago.
Youve been looking for a way to free me, Zak said, his voice thick with emotion.
We figured that much outyou dont know how much that means to me, bro,
even though it wasnt necessary.
This time Aarons shrug was almost embarrassed. Did what I thought had to be
done. I learned a lot along the way, too. And ran into more con artists and scams
than there are light bulbs on the Strip. With a pointed wiggle of his eyebrows at
me, he turned back toward his vehicle. Gotta show you guys some of the junk I

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gathered along the way. This stuff was passed off as demon killers, demon
repellents, you name it.
A large cardboard box he produced from the back of the SUV contained the wildest
assortment of junk Id seen outside of my uncles basement. Bags of herbs
decorated with mystic symbols shared space with knives, carved sticks, bottles of
Four Thieves Vinegar, and most notably, a gorgeous old revolver. Zak picked it up
carefully to admire its white handle and intricate engravings. This might not kill a
demon, but its probably worth a pretty penny anyhow. This looks like a real
antique.
Found it under the floorboards of a ruined old church in Wyoming, Aaron said.
An old guy up that way said it might be an actual vintage Colt, but I think he was
bullshitting. I juggled the prettily carved dagger I was weighing in my hand to
reach out and take the pistol from Zak. Watch it, girlie. You wanna get poked with
something live, not that piece of metal there.
Aaron! Zak sounded torn between laughing and being appalled. Dude, back off
my girl.
Just keepin it light, Aaron returned. Anyway, none of it works, so its all fit for
the junk yard, if you ask me.
No way! Nick protested. If nothing else, itll make some great b-roll shots for the
show.
Um, sure, Aarons voice took on a note of uncertainty for the first time. The
showWe need to talk about that, too. Not out here, though.
Lets go to my place, Zak said. Its not much, but its good enough.
Fine, Aaron agreed. Then you wanna stow this shit in there, Nick, so I dont
have to lug it up three flights of steps? He gestured toward the storage unit and
Nick carried the box into the cool darkness. Lets go then. Ill follow you, Zak. Then
I can follow you, he added to me, upstairs.
I groaned to myself but kept a smile on my face. So Zaks dear friend was a lech. I
could restrain myself from slapping him. Once we were in the Jeep though, I did
ask Zak, Is Aaron always such a flirt?
Not really. He just has a weird sense of humor.
Whatever. Maybe hes just nervous, too.

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When we got back to the apartment complex, Aaron declared, Im starving! Nick,
you remember that Asian place you took us to that time, over by UNLV, the one
with the incredible dumplings? Ive been craving those damn things for months,
and I dont even remember how to get thereit was in some back alley. Nick
grinned and nodded.
Aaron started to dig through his luggage in the back of his SUV and gestured Nick
over with a jerk of his head. A few moments later, Nick came over to me. Come
with me to get the food, he said quietly. Aaron wants to talk to Zak alone; he got
how tense Zak was, and I guess he wants to make sure he knows everythings
good between them. I agreed; it made sense, and after all, Id made a point of
doing the same thing several times, making sure Zak and Nick had time alone.
So why did I feel so strange this time, leaving the two in the parking lot? Maybe
just because Aaron was such a blatant womanizer, and not at all what I had
expected. I told myself, as I rode with Nick to pick up dinner, that I couldnt expect
to love everybody Zak did. Hed had a terrible first meeting with Sam and Dean,
after all, as close as they were to my heart.
Zak certainly didnt seem tense when we got back; on the contrary, his eyes were
glittering and he was almost bouncing with relieved excitement. He was a little
vague about what he and Aaron had talked about, but I didnt pry. Okay, Aaron
said after the food was spread out, I wanted to wait till all three of us were here
before I said this, butI dont know about continuing the show. I mean, hunting for
ghosts, I guess that might be okay, but this demon thing, look what its done to us.
From what Ive seen, if wed leave them alone, theyd leave us alone. Nick, you
want your family safe. Zak, you nearly lost it all. And me, well, we wont even go
into that.
Zak turned red and stared at his feet. Aaron, I explained this to Nick, and Ill try to
explain it to you. Part of the reason the demon that attacked me stayed was that it
found out what we did. It saw we were a threat to its kind, and it wanted our team
neutralized. If I stop, it wins, and I wont let that happen. You dont have to work
with ushell, Nick doesnt have to work with meIll do it myself if I have to, but I
dont want to. You know how well we worked together His voice, at first resolute,
trailed off as Aaron continued to look steadily at him. Cant we work this out
later? he finally said plaintively. Dudes, I justI just want to be happy with you,
both of you, for a while, is that too much to ask?
Nick immediately put a hand on his shoulder. Its cool, Zak, well deal later. Youre
right; lets not make any big-ass decisions tonight. Eat up, you clowns, Claire and I
didnt drive across town for you to stare at the damn food.

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Things eased after that, but I had to admit I breathed a sigh of relief when Aaron
and Nick left for the night. As I closed the door behind them, I noticed a crumpled
piece of plastic lying in a corner and picked it up. Zak! I yelled. What is this
doing here? It was the devils trap Id placed under the door mat, sketched out on
a sheet of clear transparency, an idea Zak had had after wed spent half an
afternoon scrubbing off the one Id painted on my apartment floor.
He came in from the bathroom, looking tired. OhAaron thought those might not
be a good idea. He thought if we put that shit up, it was like telling demons where
to find us and that we were afraid of them. ignoring thems the best way to be left
alone.
And who told him that lie? I demanded and replaced it. Thats as dumb as
saying locking your doors invites thieves in.
So now youre saying my friends are stupid?
No, I said whoever told him that was stupid. He wouldnt know any better; hes
not a hunter.
Neither are you, he snapped and turned back toward the bedroom.
I gaped. I was good enough to grab your ass and pull you out of hell, I think you
said.
Zak stopped and shook his head, as though dazed. Whatyeah, yeah. That shit
wasnt called for. Why did I say that? Im sorry, sweetie.
Its okay. Its been a long day and were both tired. Lets get some sleep and
things will look up.
+++
Things really didnt, though. Over the next week, I barely saw Zak; he was off with
Nick and Aaron most of the days and half the nights. I tried not to resent it. I tried
to be happy that he had finally gotten back to doing what he loved. The problem
was, he really hadnt. Much of their time together was spent arguing over the
future direction of the Ghost Adventures Crew. I couldnt help, either, because
every time I was around Aaron was making crude comments, till I snapped at last
and told him off. Thankfully Zak wasnt around at the time. I figured Aaron would
get mad and tell him, but he only smirked and went on his way.
Another problem caused by their collective preoccupation was that the deadline of
my lease was coming due in a week, and half of my furniture still hadnt been

102

moved. I co-opted Ross and Tristan one evening to help me out, but we couldnt
get it all. I sighed and decided to do the best I could. Screw them all. I was
accustomed to taking care of myself. I took off early another afternoon, and got
most of what was left into a rental truck, except my bed. By the time I wrestled it
all into my storage unit I was a sweaty hot mess. Then I remembered the key on
my chain, to the GAC unit next door, blissfully air conditioned to keep their
equipment operational. I opened the door and a puff of cool air greeted. With a
groan of gratitude I sat down and looked around me, my gaze falling on Aarons
box. I folded the flaps open and poked through the assortment of goodies, noting
again the stiletto Id coveted earlier. I wonder if hed mind if I borrowed it. Not that
Id be any better with a knife than a gun, I guess. That reminded me of the old
pistol. I found it and lifted it out gingerly, wondering if it might be a real Colt
original. Uncle Bobby knew a bit about gunsbut i quailed at the thought of calling
him, especially right now. I could just see me saying oh, the guy I exorcised? Yeah,
were on the outs right now. On the other hand, there were other hunters who
wouldnt ask such questions. I dialed Deans number. Yo!
Dean! Claire. I have a question about a gun. I described the revolver and Aarons
account of its finding. Dean put his phone on speaker and hollered for Sam to join
the conversation, then delighted in telling me how he had interrupted Sams fixing
his hair. I dragged the bickering brothers back on topic and repeated myself, even
snapping a picture with my phone and sending it to them.
What the fuck? Dean said. The Colts gone, Sammy, so what the fuck is this?
Colt made more than one demon-killing weapon, Dean. He made Rubys knife,
after all.
He what? You never told me that!
I did so! You just
Ahem! I cut them both off. Wanna translate, please?
After a suitably chastened moment of silence, Sam began, Okay. To make a long
story short, well, shortish, Samuel Colt made a pistol for killing demons. It was also
the key to a giant devils trap he built in Wyoming, to close off a gate to Hell there.
That pistol was lost; but we, um, we found out hed made other weapons for use
against supernatural enemies. Knives and such.
But not another gun, Dean put in. Not that we know of anyway. I cant read the
inscription in this shitty little photo; whats it say?

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Its Latin, I replied. It says vos vadum non timeo. Means thou shalt not be
afraid, right?
Right, Sam said. And that would make sense; the Colt we had was inscribed with
non timebo mala, or I will fear no evil.
The trap in Wyoming is inactive now, Dean added. It was pentagram shaped,
with a church built at each of its points, but one was destroyed and broke its
power. Your friend said he found this one in a ruined church in Wyoming? Well, the
best place to hide a spare key is under the doormat. Could be Colt made this one
and stashed it there as a backup.
So, then, this gun might actually kill demons? I asked, my mouth agape.
Could be, Dean said. Unfortunately, it has to be a kill shot, so you end up killing
the possessed person too. But, if theres no other way to dislodge the demon, its a
mercy.
I thanked them and hung up, seriously shaken. Aaron had claimed the gun was no
more than an antique, if that. Had he known it might be far more? And if he had,
was that why he had lied?
Had he been ready to kill Zak, if he couldnt free him?

20 So, my next question to myself was how to approach Aaron. His constant comeons made me uncomfortable approaching him about anything, but I had to know
the truth about the past months of his life. If the Colt was a real demon-killer, were
the other weapons he had collected also? And had he concluded that rescue was
not an option; that Zaks only possible escape from the demon holding him captive
was through death, a death Aaron intended to give to his friend?
At least I had a chance coming up. The guys had planned to meet at a Cuban
restaurant Zak liked on Friday afternoon, to, supposedly, plot out their weekend
and the future plans for Ghost Adventures. What it would actually turn out to be,
probably, was another argument, with Aaron insisting they avoid demonic reports
at all costs, Zak insisting they go after those very sites first and hardest, and Nick
trying to keep peace and act as a balance. When I walked into the place, Nick was
sitting at a table alone. Wheres the party? I greeted him.
His smile was small and tight. Your guess is as good as mine. Aarons at the bar
grabbing us some beers. Havent seen Zak yet. His small video camera sat on the

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table beside his hand. If he shows, that is. I figure I better film every time the
three of us get together, just in case its the last time.
I nodded, squeezed my friends shoulder, and headed toward the busy, dimly lit
bar. Aaron had just picked up two bottles of beer. Hey, baby girl! he hailed me.
Bartender! Another drink, for the lady here. Let me drop these off over there, and
we can blow this joint, whaddya say? Nick and Zak can do their things, whatever
those might be, and we, well, can do ours.
With his hands occupied with the beers, thankfully, I didnt have to play dodge-theoctopus. All the same, his grin was downright slimy. Cut the crap, Aaron. I need to
talk to you, and its probably best if I do it before Zak gets here.
Aha. I knew you couldnt resist my charm forever.
I sighed and shook my head. From what people said about you, I never got the
impression you were the kind of guy whod repeatedly hit on your best friends
girl.
His expression changed, the lechery subsumed by something more serious.
Maybe youre not.
I thought that over for a moment. Maybe Im not Zaks girl? I think Id know that.
Maybe hes not my best friend. Or, no, let me put it to you differently: maybe hes
notZak.
That was a shocking statement. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Nick approach
with camera in hand, and quickly made a decision. Okay, sounds like something
else we need to talk about. Tell you what, meet me at my old apartment tomorrow.
If youll help me disassemble my bed and load it in my rental truck and take it to
storage, that gives us plenty of time.
Aw, I can think of a lot of better things to do with you and a bed! Aaron
protested, but agreed just before Nick got within earshot. He kidded Aaron about
being so slow with the service, then headed back for the table with his bottle in his
other hand. I followed with Aaron, who kept trying to grab my butt. After swiping
his hand away several times, I finally gave up. Of course, that was when Zak
walked in. His face darkened with anger that I tried to soothe, unsuccessfully, and
that carried over into a very acrimonious and unproductive discussion among the
three men. I drank my beer even though Id rather have had a cider, picked at my
sandwich, and tried to ignore them as much as I could.

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Back at the apartment, Zak gave me the silent treatment. I concluded Id have to
make a first move. I found out some interesting info about one of Aarons
artifacts, I told him as I got ready for bed. That pretty old revolver he thought
was a fake? Turns out its not. He listened as I laid out the story of Samuel Colt,
and seemed intrigued despite himself.
Whered you find all this out? he asked.
Sam and Dean. He scowled again. What?
Strange how you can hang around with all these other guys, except me.
Maybe thats because lately youre not around to hang with.
Or because youve got Aarons hand down your pants. Hell, if Nick werent
married youd probably have been fuckin him for weeks.
I gaped, then went looking for my sneakers. Thats it. Im gonna go sleep in my
own bed. The devils trap in my bathrooms still there, so if anything sneaks in
hopefully itll get caught there. If not, maybe youll get lucky and itll kill me, and
Ill be out of your perfectly coiffed hair.
WhaClaire! Zak grabbed my arm. Wait, sweetheart, waitwhat the fuck are
we doing?
I started to answer sharply, but then I looked into his facehe looked confused,
genuinely baffled. I dont know, baby! I love you, I love only you. How could you
think any different? Other than Aaron wont stop his crazy flirting, of course, but I
have no interest in the guy, or any other guy.
I know, I know. Zak hugged me tightly to him and buried his face in my hair. Then
he pulled me with him into the kitchen, got himself a beer from the fridge and
handed me a cider. I know you wanted one of these instead of that beer.
And you said you didnt want me reading your mind, I teased gently. Now youre
reading mine. We toasted and drank, and I hoped the worst was over.
+++
Unfortunately, it wasnt. Hostilities resumed the next morning, when I found out
Zak had abruptly quit his job at the film company. Dude! Didnt you say you were
going to stick it out till you guys got the comeback show done? Now theres no
money coming in, except what I make. And you were going to honor your
commitment to them

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Fuck it. I didnt make that commitment. Aaron pointed that out to me. I owe them
nothing.
So last night you were bitching about me talking to Aaron, and today youre doing
everything he says!
Youre a good one to talk. Im not the one letting him grope me!
At that I gave up. I grabbed my purse and left. I drove around town for a while,
alternately fuming and grieving. When I came back to the complex I made a point
of parking around back, where my car wouldnt be obvious, even though Zaks Jeep
was gone too. I wasnt ready to face him yet. I went to my apartment and gazed
around at the barren walls. Maybe Sam and Dean were right, and I shouldnt have
made the sudden leap into what I thought would be a forever relationship. I sat
down on the bare floor and hugged my knees to me as tears welled up in my eyes,
then jumped up and wiped them on my shirttail at a knock on the door. Hi, Aaron.
Cmon in.
He entered with his usual smirk, which changed to a look of actual concern. Hey,
whats wrong? he said and hugged me. When I told him, he shook his head. This
is what I was talking about last night. Somethings not right. Im worried Zak may
not be as free of demonic influence as you think. The possessing entity might still
be there, or a new possession may have taken advantage of the opening.
I had intended to gradually lead the conversation around to the subject of his
weapons and their purpose, but this seemed like a tailor-made opportunity. Did
you think you might have to kill him to dislodge the original demon? Is that why
you were gathering all that supposed demon-killing gear?
Reluctantly, Aaron nodded. This fixation of his, about hunting demons: I think its
a manifestation of his possession. You need to get away from him, Claire, before
its too late. Nicks got his family, hes not going anywhere, but you can still run.
Come with me, and lets get out of Vegas.
I shook my head vehemently and moved out of his embrace. Other people tried to
tell me the same thing, so Ill tell you what I told them. I love Zak. I will not leave
him to suffer, even if he is possessed, or obsessed, or whatever. And I dont see
how he can be! I know the signs.
And you havent seen any? The short temper, the fixations, the erratic behavior?
Who told you what to look for? Tell me exactly who, and what they told you.

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Aaron followed me across the empty living room. I faced a corner, trying to master
the turmoil of my emotions, and felt him behind me. I was certain he didnt mean
to make me feel cornered, but suddenly I did. I read a lot, I prevaricated. I
taught myself. I know a lot, Aaron.
Not enough to protect yourself, apparently. Do you really want to stay until
something more than a TV and a remote control get broken?
My mouth was half open to answer when I thought of something, something that
had never occurred to me. Howd you know about that? Nobody was in Zaks
apartment that day but me, and himwell, not him, the thing that was in him. Did
he remember that and tell you? He told me he didnt remember many specifics
about that time. I was so mixed up, I was half ready to believe Zak had lied about
his memoriesI knew he remembered tortures he had not told mebut then, then,
it collided with something else that hadnt occurred to me, and the two of them
turned my spine to ice. The day you came back, you told Nick to put your box of
weapons in his storage unit so you wouldnt have to carry them up three flights of
stairs to Zaks apartment. You knew he lived on the top floor, when you hadnt
been there yet.
I started to turn, but couldnt, trapped by Aarons height and bulk. His breath at my
ear was hot and stank. Id been there, he purred. But you just figured that out,
didnt you? Id lived there for months. I screwed you there for months. Panicking, I
put my palms to the walls, braced myself and pushed, trying to use my whole body
weights leverage to free myself; but I might as well have tried to move the wall.
Demons are inhumanly strong, after all. A big arm wrapped around me just below
my shoulders, pinning my arms at my sides; the other forearm came across my
front and pressed backward against my throat, hard. I struggled uselessly, my ears
roaring and spots forming in front of my eyes as my oxygen was cut off. The last
thing I heard as consciousness faded was the demons hoarse voice: I told you, in
KansasBefore him, you were my bitch. Mine.

21 This is the chapter I mentioned earlier, in which we will leave Claires point of
view at several points for Zaks. The first person sequences are still Claire; the
third person sequences, starting here, are Zak.
Fasten your seat belts, folks
Zak watched the door slam behind Claire. Fine, he said to himself, fighting off the
pain in his chest. The demon that had possessed him had reduced him to a
crawling wretch, and it was high time he reclaimed his ego. Hed told Aaron much

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of his ordeal, and Aaron had wholeheartedly agreed Zak had to put his foot down.
He had to stop being pussy whipped. But when he walked to his window and saw
Claire squeal tires out of the parking lot, he still wanted to scream out that too-high
window for her to come back. Instead, he grabbed his keys and took off himself. A
good off-road drive would clear his head.
He never made it to the hills outside Vegas, though. Zak found himself cruising
past the LVPD headquarters, Nicks house, and finally the storage facility. How
pathetic, he chastised himself, that he hoped to find Claires car, to find her, and
hash out somehow whatever was coming between them.
Nicks truck sat outside his unit. Zak idled his engine a moment in indecision, then
killed it and got out. Inside, Nick was sitting at his makeshift editing bay. Hey,
dude, whats up? he asked.
Nothin, Zak replied dully. You heard from Claire lately? She, um, got pissed
earlier and left.
Nick swiveled sharply in his chair. Dont tell me you got on her ass about Aaron
again, he snapped, and did not give Zak a chance to reply. Dammit, dude! Shes
been fending him off since the day he got backyou havent seen all the times
shes pushed him away, or ripped him a new asshole.
Why wouldnt she have told me? Zak growled.
Because she didnt want you to think she was jealous of your friends the way
Nick halted, but he had said enough. The way I was jealous of hers, Zak finished,
half to himself.
You dont believe me? Here. I was shooting at the restaurant last night. Watch
this. Quickly he pulled up footage, and Zak watched Claire push Aaron away, turn
her head from an attempt at a kiss, knock his hand aside from her butt. Nick had
been too far away, and the bar too noisy, to pick up their conversation, but the gist
was clear: from her expression, Claire did not want to be anywhere near the guy.
So shes putting up with him because of me? Zak said with a pang of guilt as
Nick started to shut the camera down. But why didnt heI mean, hes a goofy
dude, but hes never been a wolf like that, or seriously tried to poachthats not
him. Times passed, and maybe hes more pissed at me than--
Nick interrupted him, still looking at the camera screen. What thewhat is that
oh, my GOD. He swung the screen toward Zak. Fuck, FUCK. Look, Zak! Look at
his eyes!

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Zak looked at the image frozen on the screen. Claires face was turned toward the
approaching Nick, while Aaron leered in the background. For that moment, his eyes
appeared night black. Zak felt his body go slack with shock. Shit, he breathed. I
was right. It never wanted me back. It wants her. My bitch. And its got Aaron, and
using him to try to get her.
As he reran the clip to be certain, Nick was already trying to phone Claire, then
text her, with no reply. Bet she thinks you put me up to calling her, to make up,
Nick said angrily. So shes not gonna answer. Now what?
All hesitancy vanished from Zaks mind. We find her before he can. We set him up,
lure him in, and do an exorcism. If she wont answer, we track her down. Lets start
at the apartments; maybe shes come home. With a nod Nick turned off his gear
and shot out the door. Zak started to follow, then paused at the sight of the box
Aaron had brought back from his travels. He opened it; the small knife Claire had
admired was gone, but the old revolver was still there. With a prayer he wouldnt
have to use it, he picked it up, checked to see it was loaded, and stuck it in the
waistband of his pants at the small of his back, before he ran out to the Jeep.
+++
My awareness returned slowly. I tried to move and couldnt. When I persuaded my
eyes to open, I was looking up at my bedroom ceiling, familiar cracks and all. A
quick glance around showed me I was half lying, half sitting against the headboard
of my bare bedbare because the sheets had been stripped from the mattress and
now lay in a ripped pile. Strips of cloth bound my ankles together tightly; my arms
were outstretched and my wrists likewise tied to the headboard. I tried to call out,
only to find more cloth wound through my mouth and secured to silence me.
Thankfully, I was still clothed, but that was the only good thing I saw about my
predicament.
Well, Sleeping Beautys back among us. Aaronno, the demon possessing Aaron
strolled into my field of vision with a sly grin, its black eyes regarding me
steadily. Ive been looking forward to this, just you and me. That night you so
rudely expelled me from Zaks body? This is what I had planned, after a fashion.
Our games would have ended with your demise, of course, apparently at the hands
of your raving mad lover. I shuddered, unable to tear my eyes from its foul face.
Zak had shuddered too. He thought I intended to kill you and force him to watch.
Bah, thats no fun. Much more entertaining to force him to kill you. But you know,
Im glad things worked out as they did. Now, you wont hear this often from a
demon, butI was wrong. I completely misjudged you! Using you as a brief
plaything would have been such a waste.

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It reached for my thigh; I growled and launched a kick. It dodged casually, caught
my bound ankles in one huge hand and forced them easily down. See, thats why
I had to gag you, it scolded. I knew you wouldnt hear me out otherwise. Its
other hand moved toward the head of the bed, took hold of a twisted rope of sheet
and pulled. Something abruptly jerked my head back and tightened around my
neck. I gasped for air and struggled, clenching my fists and pulling myself up with
all my strength to gain some slack in the noose choking me. The demon watched
and smiled, and finally let go. I slumped against the headboard and sucked air
through my nose, fighting the urge to whimper. All right. Now that were clear
whos in charge here, Claire, I have a proposition for you.
+++
Zak screeched into the complex parking lot. Nick was out of the Jeep almost before
the tires stopped rolling, and raced up the steps to Zaks apartment. Zak took a
second to scan the lot; Claires car was nowhere to be seen. He pulled his phone
out and sent one more desperate text. {Claireur in danger. PLZ ans me. Ilu!} He
hit Send and sprinted up the stairs.
Nothing! Nick groaned as Zak entered the silent apartment. Where the fuck is
she?
Zak felt himself start to panic. If harm came to Claire because hed made her too
angry to even acknowledge himand now he saw all of that had been instigated
by the demon, that might now be tormenting Aaron the way it had himhow could
he live with himself? Okay, he said, with a deep breath. We cant find her, lets
find him. Claires uncle told her it cant fight two opponents at oncethats how
she and I got it out of me. You and I can take it. Once we get rid of it, and get
Aaron back, theyre both safe.
With a visible shudder, Nick flipped his phone open. Not looking forward to talking
to a demon again.
I know, but youre the negotiator, dude. Please do this, for both of them, for me.
Please!
+++
As I said, the demon continued, as nonchalantly as though we were discussing
ice cream, I was mistaken in thinking you no more than a limp dishrag of a
woman, a tool to use in torturing your precious Zak. But, if youre uncooperative, I
can still take that route. I can rape you, and kill you, and when youre dead Ill find
whatever is preventing me from inhabiting your body, and remove it. Then I can

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claim you. It chuckled. I never did get around to screwing Zak. Doing it this way
could be even more enjoyable. To gain his full trust, and then betray him, and
make him believe its you I was too horrified to make a sound. Or, we can make
a deal.
Your talents are utterly wasted as a mortal, and the other side doesnt seem to
guard its operatives very well, from what Ive seen. So I propose you join me. The
power, my dear, the rush, is beyond your imagining. Plus, youll live forever! I
grunted in anger and shook my head, as much as the noose would allow. Dont
rush into a decision. Ill even sweeten the pot. You worry so much about your dear
Zak. Now personally, I think youd make a superb succubus, and if I were your
master, seducing him to damnation would be your first order. But it let out an
exaggerated sighif itll soothe your soon to be damned soul, Ill agree to leave
him be. This one and Nick too. Theres a package deal you wont get every day.
What do you say now?
It might have said more, but a buzz from its pocket interrupted it. It pulled the
phone out and laughed. Its Nick. Im so tempted to answer. Youre so noisy,
though, Id have to cut your tongue out to shut you up altogether. I closed my
eyes in desperation as the attempted call was cut off. Youre taking too long. The
noose constricted again; my eyes popped open and I fought to pull myself up,
crying out into the gag at a stab of pain in my wrist. Oops. Youve given yourself a
boo-boo, there, the demon smirked.
A trickle of blood oozed down my wrist. My struggles had driven the tiny silver star
on my bracelet through the skin. With a laugh the demon undid it and pulled it off,
easily working around my attempts to evade its grasp, even licking the droplet of
blood from the dark braid. I know what this is, and whatever you choose, you
wont be needing it anymore. It waved its hand and the leather burst into flames.
The small gesture of cruelty broke me as nothing else had, and I screamed
ZAK!!, though to mortal ears it was only a mew.
+++
Nick couldnt raise Aaron, and that worried Zak. His hand was halfway to his phone
to try himself, when he reeled from the cry that filled his head. He grabbed hold of
the back of the couch to keep his feet. Zak? You all right, bro? Nick asked.
Didnt you hear her? Zak looked frantically around. She yelledscreamed my
name
I didnt hear a thing. From the look on his face, Nick probably thought his buddy
had snapped.

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I heard her! Zak shook his head. Hes got her Hed never claimed to be
psychic, but at this moment he didnt care what his best friend or anybody
thought. He closed his eyes, reached into his head to the place he was so afraid of,
the place where hed been held prisoner for so long, and tried to trace the scream.
An instant later, he had it. Theyre in her apartment, he stated positively, and
raced out the door and down the steps. Nick followed, calling for him to slow down,
but at the foot of the stairs Zak spun and shushed him. Across the lot he could see
Claires window, and swiftly worked out in his mind a route to avoid being seen
from it. With Nick behind him, he started across.
+++
The bracelet burned until it was a scrap of ash and a small ball of molten metal
with a tiny diamond lost somewhere inside. The demon tossed it carelessly aside.
Now Ill have your answer. Ready?
I knew what my answer would be. I quailed in fear before it, but it was the only
thing I could do. I nodded.
I had to say yes.
I had to say yes, but bargain like a horse trader. The deal had to protect everyone I
loved, from any demonic hazard, ever, no matter how shitty I was at being a
demon or for how long. And I intended to be a really shitty demon, with a very brief
life span. This bastard didnt know I knew the Colt was legit. Whether a demon
could use it to commit suicide I didnt know, but I was going to find out. If not, I
could get someone else to pull the trigger. I wasnt sure I could ask that of Zak,
though I would have liked for my last sight to be his sweet face.
The demon untied the gag. I moved my jaw and licked my lips. No yelling, it
warned, and gave a small jerk on the noose as an illustration.
Why bother? I said listlessly, and it frankly chortled.
I think I sense victory. Ive persuaded you, havent i? Lets work out the details,
and then seal the deal with the traditional kiss. It licked its lips, looking like a
hungry wolf licking its chops and slavering at the scent of fresh meat. Just say the
word, Claire.
I looked with dread and grief, through the tears that filmed my eyes, into the face
of my doom.
Then I opened my mouth to say yes--but was interrupted by the distinctive crash of
a door being kicked open.

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22 The Colt appeared around the edge of the door, gripped firmly by two familiar
hands. A moment later, the rest of Zak followed it. A storm of emotions burst
within me; I didnt know whether to be thankful he was here (and how in the world
had he known where I was, let alone known to come packing a demon-killing
weapon?) or mad that my plan to protect him would never be. He took in the
vacant living room with one quick sweep, before his eyes met mine. Fucker! he
snarled and ran through the bedroom door, gun leveled at Aarons back and rock
steady. Get away from her. NOW.
The demon smiled and took its time turning to look over its shoulder. Hello there,
Zak. What a pleasant surprise. When it did move, it didnt go far, only rolling off
the side of the bed and standing casually beside it. And you brought a guest too. I
hear Nick breathing out there. Come on i-in! it called in a mocking singsong,
before it returned its full attention to Zak. Put the gun down. We both know youre
not going to use it.
Despite himself, Zak had flinched at the sight of his friends face with his eyes
blotted out by demonic black, but his hands never faltered. Maybe you think you
know that. I dont know anything for certain. Aaron may not even be in there. You
may havehave decided you were better off killing your next victim.
Hah. He thought that about you, you know. Oh, no, you dont know, because you
havent talked to him. And you wont. Not because hes dead, though. No, hes still
in here, safely tucked away. I did learn some things from our relationship, one
being that I should be a bit more, restrained, shall we say, in playing with my food.
Ah, there you are, it paused to greet Nick as he cautiously stepped through the
door, his eyes in turn widening. I am impressed, Zak, that you figured out which
weapon was the real thing, the demon went on, gesturing toward the Colt. The
others are useful, but not against my kind. More likethis. The stiletto I had eyed
suddenly appeared in his hand, and he bent and pressed it against my neck,
pulling on the noose at the same time. I gasped and tried not to swallow; the blade
was so close any movement would cut me.
Back off! Zak yelled. Let her go.
No. I told you: before you had her, she was mine. And will be again. Claire and I
have come to anunderstanding. Havent we, my pet?
Maybe I still had a chance to save Zak, and everybody else I loved. Loosen up,
idjit, I rasped. Howhowm I supposed to talk?

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Oops. My bad. With an indulgent smirk, my captor eased the choking pressure.
I used the moment of regaining my breath to arrange my thoughts. Youre not
rushing me into anything. Theres still some nego
It cut me off with an angry jerk on the noose. No. I gave you the terms, take them
or leave them. The knife touched my throat, and I felt hot wetness trickle down
my neck. The demon turned its head to look back at Zak with a triumphant little
smile. Youre too weak for her. She likes it rough, and she wants what I can give
her, the power, the life. Thats what she wants.
A spasm passed across Zaks face, and I had to look away. Better he thinkwell,
anything badof me than remain in danger. In the next moment, though, he
smiled, that same small sweet smile that was the first sight of him Id had after his
exorcism. Tears I could not hide sprang to my eyes. Bullshit, he said, not in a
desperate, say-it-aint-so tone of denial, but a calm voice of absolute certainty that
even made the demons black eyes blink. Shes lying. I dont know all the details,
how shes planning to double cross you, but shes lying. I know that.
You soundawfully certain. The demon sounded as suddenly unsure as it looked.
I am. Unbelievably, Zak lowered the pistol. One little present you left me was,
apparently, some opening of my mind. Not to say Im a psychic superhero, but I
know things, things I didnt know before. He took a step toward the demon.
Youre in a bad spot. You can stay in Aarons body, and keep using your energy to
control him, cause I know him well enough to know hes not easy to keep down.
You can make a deal with Claire, and never turn your back because you dont know
when shes gonna stick a fuckin knife in it
Zak, what the fuck? I cried.
Zak never even looked at me. Ill make you a better deal. We need to talk man to
man. You told me you were human once, right? So how about shutting her up? Not
permanently! he added sharply when the demon grinned. In a moment I was
gagged again, and bewildered, but at least I could breathe and didnt have a knife
to my neck.
Nick moved angrily toward them. Zak, you cant deal with
Shut up, Nick. I was sick of you and Aaron riding on my coattails, long before the
Gamble house. Zak took his eyes off the demon just long enough to glance at
Nick. Remember Waverly Hills? The way you two taunted me the whole time?

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Think about that, and keep your fuckin mouth closed before my former roommate
here makes you close it.
The demon all but capered with glee. Looks like all that time in solitary lent itself
to a bit of soul searching, it said to Zak.
It did. I understand where you were coming from now. And we could get a lot done
if we worked together instead of at odds. Nick tensed, as if to attack, but suddenly
his face changed. It was something Zak had said, I knew it, but what it meant I
didnt know, and my helplessness was maddening. I could only wait, and hope, and
trust that Zak knew what he was doing.
While I was processing that, the demon had asked what was keeping Zak from him.
Zak peeled off his t-shirt to show the barely healed tattoo. I can take care of this,
Zak was saying, but Ill need that knife.
The demon reversed it as though to hand it over hilt first, then abruptly reached
down and pulled the noose taut. I let out a strangled yip; it stood up but the force
did not lessenit had tied or fastened the end, so I continued to choke. Dont lie
and say you dont care if she dies, it told Zak. Even I care, though for my own
reasons. It handed him the knife. Make it quick.
Oh, I will. Several things happened in the next instant. With a flick of one wrist,
Zak tossed the knife to Nick; with a thrust of the other he flung the black shirt over
the demons head. Grabbing it by the shoulders, he kicked its knees from under it
and took it to the floor. Get Claire! he yelled at Nick, who vaulted the struggle
and landed on the bed.
He was good; his first slash cut the noose, his second freed my right hand. I pulled
the gag loose. Gimme the knife! I rasped. Help Zak. It takes
Two of us, I know! After the first moment of surprise the demon was fighting
back, though handicapped by lack of vision. Id heard of demons mental powers
but never seen them until now. The knife in my hand quivered as though another
hand were trying to grab it from me; I held on and breathed a prayer for
protection. A pillow flew across the room, but since nearly everything else had
already been moved out, there wasnt much it could throw. Zak still held it down,
pummeling it, but as I continued to free myself I could tell he was pulling punches,
attempting to subdue it without doing serious harm to Aarons body.
Nick jumped off the bed. Bathroom! Zak panted. Devils trap. Still there, right
Claire?

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Yeah. Go! The two men wrestled their foe into the bathroom and the small
whirlwind of torn sheet that had been brewing in the bedroom died; once in the
devils trap its powers were blocked. The next thing I heard was Zaks voice, clear
and unafraid as he chanted the start of the Ritual Romanum. Damn, was I glad now
he had been such a geek about learning the exorcism by heart. The demon started
yelling, trying to distract him, but Nick in turn distracted it by calling out to Aaron. I
tried to go to them, but my legs were rubber. I crawled to the end of the bed so I
could see into the next room, though pretty much all I saw was Zaks back, and
croaked the Latin words along with him.
In what seemed like no time, the roar of a foul wind filled the apartment. I ducked
as it swirled furiously out the bathroom door toward me, and raised what voice I
had to keep the chant goingit would try this last gambit, attacking me, to break
Zaks concentration. Over the rush of air, though, I heard him finishing the ritual,
and the disembodied entity vanished with a bang. On the bathroom floor, Zak and
Nick crouched over Aaron. Hes breathing, Nick said, as sharp and methodical as
ever.
Dont touch him, Zak warned. Let him come around on his own, and if he can
walk out of the trap, were good. Can you
I got this. Go!
I had lain my head on the mattress with a sigh of relief, but when Zak burst
through the door I scrambled to sit up. I moved too fast, nearly lost my precarious
balance and fell off the bed before he caught me. Claireoh FUCK, Claire He
held me so tight I could feel his heart pounding as hard as mine.
Im okay, Im okay, I said, but the trembling of my body said otherwise. Zak
pulled me to him and held me in his lap like a little girl, whispering gently to me till
my fear eased. Howd you find me?
I heard you scream my name.
But I didntYou mean that part was true? You think the demon possessing you
opened your brain up to psychic phenomena? Now I knew how hed felt when I
told him of my dreams. So are you reading my mind now?
He laughed. Not quite. May never happen again. But I, um, maybe I blocked part
of it, unconsciously, until I was in herewhen I heard you scream, Ifelt you too.
When Ive been possessed the entity jerked my emotions around, but this was your
emotions I felt, for just a second: your fearand your love. So muchYou really
love me that much?

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His voice took on a note of wonder that made me smile in turn. Depending on the
moment you listened in, I might love you a lot more than what you picked up.
He almost blushed. Anyway, thats how I knew you were lying. The rest was
bluffing. Like poker, just for much higher stakes. For a few moments we sat quietly
holding each other, before Zak called, Nick! Anything?
Still out like a light. Nick sounded worried.
Hell be out for a few, and probably be confused when he wakes up. Zak sure
sounded like he cast out demons every day. I almost giggled to myself, and
thought Uncle Bobby would be proud, and unconcerned about my safety, if he
could see this. We dont know how much hell remember, either; he may even
think Im still possessed, but well handle that if it comes up
He was cut short by a rustle of movement, and a sudden voice that was both
strange and familiar: Aarons voice yelling, Dude! What the fuck??

23 Zak may have been concerned about Aarons recall of the recent past, but you
couldnt have told it from his reaction. The instant he heard his buddys voice his
head came up; his eyes lit and a hopeful smile came to life on his face.
I, on the other hand, was not so immediately excited. From the bathroom Nick said,
Welcome back, bro. What do you remember?
Welcome back, what Through the half-open door, we could see Aaron getting
slowly to his feet. I remember getting beat up, he growled. By Zak. Hes here,
isnt he? Fuck, Nick, I told you not to try and contact himhes not himself, hes
dangerous--you oughta know, you were there
I know, but thats over, dude. Hes okay. Nick started to back toward the door.
Cmere, Ill show you.
It was a good move to get Aaron to come out of the devils trap on his own, if it had
worked. Oh, fuck no. That thing may have you fooled, but not me. My ass is
staying right herewherever here is, cause at least its got a safe spot even if it is
in a bathroom!
This isnt sounding good, I murmured to Zak. At the same time I let one foot
hang off the edge of the mattress and casually kicked the Colt under the bed. I
dont want him to barge out and come deck you.

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He wont. That light of hope and joy still illuminated Zaks face. Unless he does,
and if so, I probably deserve it.
Nick was trying to explain, but Aaron cut him short. Thats not Zak, bro. Not our
Zak. Zaks gone His voice broke. Hes gone, and he aint comin back.
Zak caught his breath. I felt him start to stand up and followed suit, forestalling his
effort to put me down on the bed. Maybe I had to hold onto him to support my still
shaky legs, and maybe I couldnt fend off an attack on him, but by God, I was not
going to let him face this alone, even if I had to lean on the door frame.
Aarons rant halted when Zak appeared in the doorway. Zaks smile faltered, and
the brightness in his eyes was tears now. Hey, bro, he said softly.
From the security of the devils trap on my bathroom floor, Aaron glowered, his fists
clenched. I swore I wouldnt let you hit me ever again.
Zaks gaze dropped, sadness extinguishing the light. I know, he breathed. I tried
not to hurt youbut it was the only way we could get you in here and get that son
of a bitch demon out of you.
Out of me? Confusion warred with the anger in Aarons face. He shifted as
though to come forward; Nick had been leaning against the tile wall but came up
straight, ready to mediate as always. I pushed myself more upright too, not that I
could do much; but my movement caught Aarons eye. He stared at me, looking
more puzzled by the moment, and even seeming a bit alarmed as he took in the
bloody strips of sheet that still clung to my wrists and neck. Who are you? he
asked me.
I took a deep breath and hoped I didnt say something stupid. Hi, Aaron. Im
Claire. Im, uh
Mine, Zak said from behind me.
I cut my eyes, then turned on him, on a sudden impulse to diffuse the tension.
Enough already. I guess a girl should be flattered to have a demon and a mortal
fighting over her, but consider me unflattered. And as for this whole claiming me
as your property thing? The last time I checked, Mr. History Buff, Abe Lincoln
banned that a long time ago.
Instead of a snarky reply, Zak just smiled, and when he spoke it was over my
shoulder to Aaron. You see why I love her, he said. Shes a smart ass like you.

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Too late I felt the big mans presence behind me and realized Id left myself open to
attack from him again, if for a different reason. Zaks face showed no fear, though.
Not that that meant much; show no fear was like his personal motto. When I
turned, Aarons face wore an expression I knew. Youre remembering, I said with
certainty.
On Zak it had been a dawning of awareness; on Aaron, when his eyes met mine, it
was horror sweeping like an ocean wave. Holy fuck, he gasped, and nearly went
down. Instantly Nick was there, catching hold of his shoulder and guiding him out
of the bathroom to sit on the bed. Zak hovered close but backed off once Aaron
was sitting, shifting from foot to foot as though still uncertain what reaction his
presence would elicit. I felt stronger but still sat down, on the other end of the bed.
Nick sat beside Aaron, who shook his head hard as though to clear it. I was gonna
kill him, he said to Nick, who started protesting. No, dude, I was. Well, not him. I
figured damn quick that wasnt him who came at me. I went looking for ways to
get what was in him out. I talked to people, living and dead, looked stuff up, and
finally I went back to the house in Kansas, and summoned it. I waited to see if it
would come, in itsmeatsuit, the hunters call itbut it didnt. Thats when I was
sure he was--was dead.
So then I went looking for a way to kill it. If it was too late for him, the least I could
do is give his body release. I chased a hundred fuckin leads till I found an old
pistolit just felt right, in my hand, and I went to a place an old man told me
about, that was supposed to be a huge portal from hell, and called it out again.
And it came that time, Nick said quietly. Only not the way you expected it to.
Aarons back faced me, but his stooped sitting posture said all I needed to know. I
dont remember much after that, till just nowbits like out of nightmares, being
caught in a humongous spiderweb
He shuddered. I feel you, dude, Zak said.
Finally Aaron turned to face him, and gripped his forearms. Are you the real Zak?
Unexpectedly, Zak let out a little laugh. Waverly Hills, he said. You got what I
meant when I said that, didnt you, Nick?
Nick grinned. The doppleganger, he replied. Every time you told Aaron to go in
someplace alone, hed ask if you were really you.
Zak nodded. Best thing I could come with off the top of my head, to try and tell
you what I was saying wasnt me. You know that, right? It was bullshit, every word.

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I never, ever, thought that about you. Or you, he added to Aaron. Yeah, its me.
For what thats worth. His hands closed around Aarons arms, and the tears hed
held back before spilled over. Im sorry, dudeyou never wanted any of this, I
dragged you into it, and then
Fuck that! Aaron startled us all with his snapping tone. Youre sorry? Youre
sorry? Abruptly he stood. I tensed even though I couldnt do a thing, and Nick did
too; but Zak made no move to pull free. Instead, he just stood there looking up at
his friend with eyes made huge by tears, until with an audible sob Aaron pulled him
into a big bear hug. That slimy bastard had me hardly any time, and Im half crazy
from itbut you were with it, all that time, and we didntcouldntand youre
sorry? Fuck, fuck, no way we, I, can make up for that
Nothing to make up for, bro, Zak reassured him. We started putting the pieces
together, and I realized you were trying to help me, just couldnt track you down
fast enough.
If youd answered your fuckin voicemails! Nick put in.
Zak and Aaron moved apart and grinned at each other through their tears. Dude,
Aaron said, go put your fuckin shirt on before this starts looking like gay porn.
Dont kiss me, Im taken, Zak shot back and went to the bathroom to find his
shirt.
That brought Aarons attention back to me. He went to one knee on the floor by
the bed; I repressed a small flinch when he reached for my handit was his body
that had tried to kill me, after all, even if operated by a different mind, and my
body reacted accordingly. Speaking of sorrydamn, I dont even have a clue what
to say!
The open remorse in his big dark eyes went a long way toward getting me past
that brief mental block. I smiled. How about nice to meet you Claire, and yes Id
be happy to be in your wedding.
Wedd His mouth popped open and he looked remarkably like he did in old
episodes of Ghost Adventures when something creepy happened. No way! Dont
believe it till he gives you a ring.
He did, sort of. I went over to the window, squatted and found the little ball of
burnt leather and melted silver, with a tiny diamond buried somewhere inside. I
sadly explained it as Zak returned.

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Ill get ya something nicer, he promised. Depending on how Aaron feels about
resurrecting the Ghost Adventures Crew.
Fuck yeah! Aaron was enthusiastic. After this I wanna take these nasty things on
head first. But I want to know a lot more. Whered you get the tattoo? And howd
you get loose, and howd you throw that thing out of me? It was like, the real
hunters Ive been talking to, these guys that live in the shadows.
Long story, I said, best told someplace more comfortable. Shall we adjourn to
our place? I asked.
Zak nodded. As we retrieved the Colt and I claimed the little stiletto, Aaron looked
over at Nick, clearly trying to be discreet, and mouthed, OUR place? Nick just
grinned.
By the time we had all compared notes, and videos and such, it was early the next
morning. Aarons account made sense of, among other things, the words the spirit
Johanna had communicated to me at Bobby Mackeys; he had spoken to the spirits
there about searching for a way to kill the demon and free Zak, even if only to a
peaceful death, and he had asked about the Colt, which he had heard of but not
yet found.
Nick and Aaron finally left, headed for Nicks house where Aaron planned to crash
on the couch till he could get a place; hed sold his house when he left Vegas. I
closed the apartment door behind them and rested my forehead against it. The
day had ended well but I was unspeakably tired. Zaks arms went around me from
behind. I promised you I wouldnt let it touch you again, he whispered.
I turned to see his troubled face. I bear some blame there too, you know. If Id
remembered what Patti told me, about not separating from you, things would have
gone a lot easier.
It got to me again. It wasnt inside me, but itgot in my head, somehow. It used
Aarons words to manipulate me; it made me suspicious and angry, and I didnt
block it out.
On the other hand, you may be right about the mental link. The only times its
happened were times when the demon was, or had been, influencing you. So
maybe it did open your mind up.
Thats a hell of a trade off. Being psychic but having a demon all up in your grill.
I giggled. Lot easier to just say, lets talk things out instead of yelling at each
other. Deal?

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Deal, Zak agreed, and we sealed it with a kiss.

24 2 weeks later
I sat under a palm tree in a parking lot just off the Strip, watching the guys film.
The special was coming together; Id seen a rough cut of most of it the night
before, and it was going to grab the attention of everyone who had ever watched
an episode of Ghost Adventures. They had framed it as a reunion, implying that
after the debacle in Kansas the three had gone their separate ways, but been
drawn back by their mutual drive to investigate the paranormal together. The part
they were shooting now was a general reminiscence session, and watching Zak,
Nick and Aaron pore over past exploits was both entertaining and moving.
They wound up and came back over to my shady spot. If you two have any free
time this weekend, Zak said, you could look this over and maybe start thinking
about how to edit it in. Well get down to work on Monday.
After your weekend getaway, Aaron kidded. What are you two doing, eloping?
Eloping? I laughed. Not a chance, after he made me wait to get married till you
got back, buddy.
So where are you going? Nick asked, inquisitive as always.
I have to go get approval to marry her, Zak said firmly.
The next morning, Zak and I pointed the Jeep toward the airport. A hop to Denver
and another to Sioux Falls later, we rented a car and headed out of town. Zak gave
me the wheel; the road was still familiar to me after all these years, but I grew
more tense as we drove through the woods and closer to our destination.
What am I going to say? I wondered. I could go in as a penitentexcept that I
wasnt sorry, not in the least, for the risks I had taken. They had won me not just
the love of the man sitting beside me, but a new outlook on myself. No. Im sorry if
Uncle Bobby is angry with me, but Im not sorry for what I did.
We emerged from the trees at the sign that read SINGER SALVAGE YARD. The place
looked just as I remembered it, with the fenced in yard filled with junked cars, and
the lovely old house, with a familiar figure seated on the front porch. I pulled up in
front and stopped, though normally I would have pulled around back and parked by
the back door. I swallowed hard, and felt Zaks hand close over mine on the
steering wheel. When I looked up, his smile and the determination in his eyes gave

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me heart. I got out of the car and faced the man sitting in a chair tipped back on
two legs. Uncle Bobby, I greeted him. Uh, thank you for agreeing to see me.
Hmph. You make me sound like a damned CEO. What would youve done if I
hadnt?
Gone on with my life, I guess. But my wedding wouldnt be nearly as good without
you.
That made him pause in turn. He pushed back the omnipresent baseball cap and
scratched his head. Wedding, huh? Id tell ya not to rush into anything, but you
seem to of developed a sudden yen not to listen to anybody that might know any

Thats not fair. Zak had gotten out too, and jumped in with both feet, as he was
wont to do. Claire listens, when she needs to, and acts when she needs to. And
obviously, she knows the difference. Im living proof of that.
Uncle Bobbys eyes narrowed. You must be the idjit that got her into this mess.
Oh for cryin out loud, Uncle Bobby! I burst out. You make it sound like Im
knocked up!
Behind me Zak snorted. My uncle scowled. Thats be a damn sight easier for me
to take, honestly, than knowing I pulled you into my world. I never wanted that for
you, girl. Your mother wouldnt have wanted that.
His voice was suddenly rough with emotion. Emboldened, I moved to the porch
steps and looked up at him. Mom wouidnt have wanted me to spend my life
cowering either. Zaks hands settled on my shoulders. You may be mad at me,
but Im not mad at you. I love you, Uncle Bobby. If you hadnt let me see into your
world I reached up and put my hands over Zaks, choked up for a moment.
Dammit, I really didnt want to cry. Zak would still be trapped in his own private
hell, and Id still be crawling through life. So I want to thank you, even if you dont
want me to stay.
Dont want Uncle Bobby growled. You really havent learned a damn thing,
have you? Were family, Claire. You dont dump family like a bag of spoiled pig
parts. He stood, and I did what I really wanted to do, which was run up those
steps into his arms. Now, he said after hugging me, Sam and Dean tell me you
did a bang-up job on that demon, so lets see some proof. Other than this young
fella here, that is. He glared at Zak, but I could see the telltale sparkle in his eyes.
I suspected Zaks sturdy defense of me had won him some points.

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We brought out the laptop, dragged chairs out the kitchen door, and once more I
showed the video of Zaks exorcism (thankfully now edited to remove the naughty
bits). You did all right, Uncle Bobby admitted.
All right? Zak was appalled. She was fuckin awesome. You should be proud of
her!
Okay, okay, Im proud of her, Uncle Bobby admitted. You happy, punk boy? I
chuckled and pretended to reach up to muss Zaks carefully spiked hair; of course,
he dodged.
I got my turn to brag about Zak and Nicks exorcism of Aaron, and Zak explained
their plans to return to paranormal investigation. After a wedding, from the sound
of it, Uncle Bobby said. Why? he asked Zak sharply. Convince me. Why do you
want to marry my niece?
Zaks initial reply startled me. I dont know, he said with a small laugh. For a
long time I thought Id never get married. Id never been with anybody I wanted to
spend a months vacation with, let alone the rest of my life. But, when I was
possessed He fell silent, and I could see in his eyes that he was going back to
that dark place. I worried for him, but I had to let him go, as I had let him go up
those stairs in the Gamble house. The demon knew so much about meit knew
what I really feared. Not snakes, or planes, or clowns, though I really dont like
those. What scares me to my core is being helpless, and alone, and without hope.
Claire changed all that. Even before she freed me, I was no longer alone, or
hopeless. She wouldnt give up. No matter how that bastard fucked with her, or
pushed her, she wouldnt give up on me. His gaze returned to the present, to me,
and I smiled, the ache of the past yielding before the warmth of now. She is who
she is, and I love her.
Uncle Bobby hmphed again, then looked at me. You look all besotted, girl, so Im
not even gonna bother to ask you to explain yourself. People in love are all idjits,
anyway.
Absolutely, I agreed. His grumpy tone was contradicted by the softness in his
eyes, and I remembered my mom had always said hed never gotten over his
wifes death. I realized I didnt know how she had died, and resolved one day to
find out. So are we welcome to stay for lunch?
Yep. My uncle got up. Cmon in, well see if you remember half what I taught
you about a kitchen.

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I remembered far more than half, but I also noticed Uncle Bobby snagging two
beers from the old refrigerator and steering Zak back into the house, leaving me to
preside over the pork cutlets browning in the skillet. As for why, I had my theories.
My uncle probably wanted to show Zak his house, and show him a bit of what
being a full-fledged hunter was about. Heaven knew, the bizarre books that
covered every flat surface in the place would send many people straight out the
door screaming. I picked up the one lying open beside the kitchen sink, and smiled
to myself as I learned a little about some Japanese demon. Uncle Bobby would find
out quickly enough that Zak was not put off easily.
When the meat was done and the veggies chopped and prepared, I went looking
for the menfolk, feeling like a farmwife. They had found their way back to the front
porch, and sat finishing their beers. So, Uncle Bobby was saying to Zak,
whaddya think?
I think youre one brave man, Bobby. And I wish I knew even a little of what you
know. Zak set his empty bottle down. No. I wont bullshit you. I need to know a
little of what you know. I cant be a hunter. I know that. Hell, Ive talked to Sam and
Deanthis is their lives, they were raised to it. But Im seeing now that if Im
investigating the supernatural, I need to at least know how to protect myself, and
my buddies, and Claire. And to do that, I need your help.
I caught my breath. My uncle sat quietly and studied Zak for a moment. You know
anything about guns? he finally asked.
Zak laughed a little. My stepdad was a police chief. I havehadstill have, I
guess, a concealed carry permit. Hell yeah, I can shoot.
Uncle Bobby actually looked a little impressed. What kind of hardware you train
on?
Had a Glock, and a Smith & Wesson Bodyguard .38. Damn demon hocked em,
though. Time to go shopping
Zak halted when I opened the door, but I laid any worry he had to rest. And he
handled that Colt like a pro, I told my uncle, then glanced over my shoulder at
Zak. Did I ever mention the way you kicked that door in was really hot?
Oh damn, not in front of me, Uncle Bobby groaned as he got up to come in.
After lunch we sat outside talking about everything under the sun, until suddenly a
familiar black Impala appeared at the gate. Did you call them? I demanded of
Uncle Bobby as Sam and Dean got out.

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Nope, just good timing, I guess. The words were barely out of his mouth when a
second car slowed and turned off the main road. Or not. Whore those fools...Son
of a bitch! he finished as the car stopped and Aaron emerged from behind the
wheel.
You followed us? Zak sputtered.
Not exactly, Aaron admitted, red-faced, as Nick cautiously got out of the car too.
Ive been here before. Um, hi, Mr. Singer. Uncle Bobbys jaw still hung slightly
ajar. Sam and Dean eyed the newcomers, sizing them up. Hes the one who told
me about Wyoming.
I made introductions. Aaron reached into a bag in the back seat and produced the
Colt for perusal. Uncle Bobby disappeared into the house and emerged with an
ancient leather volume that was apparently Samuel Colts personal journal, and
the afternoon sped by as we all hovered over the gun. Aaron offered to leave it, but
Uncle Bobby thought it was safer for Aaron to keep it. Less chance of some
random demon chancing upon it, he said.
Except for the one we pissed off, whos still out there, Nick replied. Is there any
way to destroy it, other than shooting it? I mean, it could be in some innocent
persons body, somebody who doesnt have protection like we do. Aaron nodded,
shifted where he sat on the porch steps, and winced. I told him getting the
protection tattoo on his butt was a bad idea, but he insisted that if any demon ever
menaced him again he wanted to turn around, pull down his pants and tell it to kiss
his ass.
The only other way, Sam said, is to know who they were in life, find their bones,
and burn them.
And I doubt it gave name, rank or serial number to anybody, Dean added.
Um, Zak began, actually, it did tell me a name, once. Though it may have been
lying, of course.
Uncle Bobby sat up straighter. Maybe, but from what you said it sounds like one
stupidly arrogant piece of hell-shit. Gimme the particulars. Zak did, and my uncle
noted everything down. Research time, he said to Sam, who looked pleased as
punch. Lets find this bastard and have a cookout.
It felt like a weight had been lifted from my chest. Secretly I had worried ever since
Aarons exorcism, recalling Zaks words that the demon could return any time, take

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any form, and well might, to get back at us for defeating it twice. If that worry was
gone, then we were truly free to start anew.
Zak seemed to feel it too. He pulled me aside as Nick and Aaron began comparing
tales with Sam and Dean, trying to outdo each other, with Uncle Bobby refereeing.
Ive got something for you. Wanted to wait till you got things settled with your
uncle. I sighed inwardly; hed dragged me to one of Vegas fanciest jewelry stores
and threatened to spend half his advance on a ring. What he pulled from his baggy
pocket, however, was a bracelet identical to the one the demon had destroyed. I
went back to the store where I got the original. The man who owned it
remembered it and made another one. To my squeals, he said, I figured youre a
cheap date, so I better take advantage of my good fortune. I pretended to slap
him, but kissed him instead, till a round of catcalls made us stop.
It was late afternoon, and nobody seemed to be going anywhere. I thought it was a
good thing the rambling old house had so many bedrooms upstairs. Uncle Bobby
had gone in to start a huge pot of his famous chili. Sam had decided a bonfire was
called for, and he and Dean started piling wood in the back yard. Zaks gaze swept
over the salvage yard. Hey guys, he said to Nick and Aaron, remember we were
talking about where to shoot our opening? This place might work. A junkyard, kind
of like Ghost Adventures went to the junkyard of cancelled shows, or, like, our team
got scrapped for a while.
Oh no, hes using metaphors! Run! Aaron laughed, but he went to the car for
gear. Zak got his camera out of his bag, and after assuring Uncle Bobby that no
one would be able to recognize the location, they walked around and found a good
spot. Zak sat in a half-burnt hull of a 75 Maverick, his eyes closed as he went over
the words he wanted to say. Aaron pulled me aside and gave me an extra camera.
Shoot all three of us. Well need that, for this.
I knew what he meant. He took up a position to Zaks left, filing him, while Nick
stood on the right doing the same. Zak began, Almost two years ago, the Ghost
Adventures Crew was like the old cars in this junkyardbroken, nonfunctional. I
want to thank the Travel Channel for everything they did to try and help us; but its
time that you, the fans, heard the truth.
I bit my lip, but held the camera steady, as Zak laid out his case, and explained
how he was to blame for the disaster that hurt his companionsuntil he was cut
off by a firm Bullshit! from Nick.
Zak stopped short, and turned his head to look quizzically at Nick. What?
He said bullshit, Aaron said helpfully.

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Zaks gaze flicked backward briefly. I heard what he said. Nick, youre fuckin up
the take. I really dont wanna have to go through this a bunch of times
You wont, Nick returned. This is the take. Youre not telling the whole truth, so
were gonna make sure you do. Yeah, you screwed up in Kansas. But I screwed up
too. I let things go undone, that wouldve kept us safe.
And I fucked up too, Aaron added. I bailed, instead of staying and fighting. So if
you want to spread blame, its like manure, bro, theres plenty to go around. From
behind me I heard barely smothered snickers; Sam and Dean were watching the
filming, and clearly amused.
Zak was not amused. His mouth hung open. Dudes, he said, dudes. He
stopped, swallowed, and suddenly said, You do know I love you both, right?
Of course, Nick grinned. Just dont tell everybody. We got reputations to
maintain.
What, and I dont? Zak retorted. He started to laugh and reached out both arms,
ending up in the middle of a massive bro-hug.
I grinned, and kept filming.