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YES I CAN
Success is a Choice
You can succeed, if you believe you can
Dedicated to My Parents
Acknowledgements
All praise to Allah, the beneficent, the merciful and the creator of this
universe. Without His blessings, I wouldnt have been able to write this
book. Pray to the Almighty Allah and give your best try and He helps. I
am thankful to Allah that He is with me all the time. Thank you for
providing me with the natural talents of creativity and putting my thoughts
in words and colors.
I am grateful to my parents who have always been with me from my
childhood and appreciated me in all my achievements. Without their
unconditional support, I would have stopped trying at some point in my
life. They tried to provide me everything I needed the love, care, good
education, good learning environment, confidence and necessary
accessories. I Love you mom and dad.
Thanks are due to my siblings Fahad Siddiqui and Maher Siddiqui and
some of my sincere friends, especially Syed Furqan Akhtar, Hammad A.
Mateen, Midhat Shahab, Sana Mahmood, Hammad Younus, Myra Nasir
Qureshi, Muhammad Khalid Saifullah, Muhammad Arshad, Muhammad
Zain Siddiqui and Hasan Shahid, who have given me the courage and
passion to try and produce results and who stood with me in difficult
times and occasions. Their advices and suggestions were always
helpful.
I am also thankful to my office colleagues and supervisors; some of them
were a source of inspiration particularly Mr. Asif Saad, Mr. Qamar Haris
-v-
Manzoor, Mr. Adnan Wasay Samdhani and Mr. Muhammed Talha Khan.
Thanks to Mr. Raja Waheedullah Khan, Mr. Tariq Nazir Virk, Mr.
Shamsuddin Ahmad, Mr. Irfan Ahmed, Mr. Farhad Jamil, Mr. Raza Anis
and my team members for their support in writing the book.
I would really like to appreciate the efforts of Mr. Arif Raza and Ms.
Shazia Siddiqui in giving me an opportunity to conduct training session
on Yes I Can, which has helped me in making some amendments in
the original drafted content of this book.
I feel a deep sense of gratitude to my teachers who have helped me
throughout my schooling life and beyond. My teachers have always been
my well wishers, mentor and source of inspiration. The names are not
limited to Ms. Ayesha Siddiqui, Ms. Talat Zohra, Mr. Rashid Ahmed
Khan, Ms. Zar Afshan Shakeel, Mr. Hashmat, Mr. Mukaram Siddiqui, Mr.
Abbas Mazhar, Prof. Akhtar Nadyme, Dr. Saad A. Qazi, Mr. Riazuddin,
Dr. Ishrat Hussain, Mr. Saleem Umer, Mr. Yaseen A Meenai, Mr. Jawad
Chaudhary, Ms. Naheed Memon, Mr. Sabir Syed and Mr. Rameez
Khalid.
Special thanks to Ms. Mehak Zahid and Ms. Afshan Zahid, the editors
and reviewers of this book, who have taken out time from their busy
schedules and reviewed it. Their positive feedback has added valuable
changes to this book. I would also like to thank Ms. Ecaterina Tomsa,
Acquisition Editor, for her assistance during the publication process.
Any omission of names, of those who helped me during writing this book,
is unintentional and I apologize for it.
- vi -
I would also like to take this opportunity to thank the readers of my book
in advance who have selected to read this book from the pool of books of
elite authors. Thanks to those who have gifted this book to their loved
ones with a wish to see them successful in their lives.
- vii -
Contents
Foreword.................................................................................................. xi
Why You Should Read This Book? ....................................................... xiii
Yes I Can versus No I Cannot ...............................................................1
Strengthen Your Yes I Can .....................................................................8
1. Know Yourself.....................................................................................11
2. Crush the Enemy Called Fear ............................................................19
3. Nothing is Impossible..........................................................................24
4. Think Big and Innovative ....................................................................29
5. There is Always a Choice ...................................................................37
6. Never Give Up Approach ..................................................................44
7. Game without Ball...............................................................................53
8. Disability is Lack of an Ability ..............................................................59
Final Words.............................................................................................63
About the Author .....................................................................................66
- ix -
Foreword
I know a lot of people would say that this book is quite simple. This
comment is acceptable for me; in fact I would appreciate any such
comment. I have intentionally kept it simple. As Confucius said Life is
really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.
The reasons, for giving simplicity preference over complexity, are quite
simple themselves. First reason is that this book can be easily
understood by a school going boy or girl. When you are reading a
complex language, your mind is occupied in translating that language to
a simpler one. Since you are unable to concentrate on the context of the
book properly, there are chances that you do not fully understand it.
Second reason is that you can read this book in a very short span of
time. I believe when you are reading a complicated and detailed book,
you lose interest due to its verbose nature. Some people stop in the
middle of the book as they get tired of reading the same topic again and
again. You will find this book different as you can read it while on a flight,
during weekend or during your leisure hours easily. Third reason is that it
contains several topics that are based on common sense. Complexity is
anti to common sense and I dont want to adopt a non-sense approach.
Anyways, you have the right to disagree with me on these justifications
to be an author of a simple book.
Why am I writing this book? This is a very important question. I would
emphasis on Why in this book several times. So this Why emphasis
should be applied to this book as well; Why is this book written?
- xi -
The theme of this book is similar to this poem - Yes I can! If you want to
kick the t out of cant from your life and turn it on with the expression
Yes I Can, this is the book for you.
After reading this book, you will understand how to fuel the passion of
success within yourself, which is nothing but a strong Yes I Can. You
will find yourself accepting more challenges in life and achieving your
dreams, after reading this book. If sky is the limit for you then this is the
book you must read.
- xiv -
If you start with the thought of Yes I Can then nothing can stop you from
accomplishing your goals. You get the driving force, which is simply
unstoppable. Yes I Can will keep you motivated and you will not give
up, no matter how difficult the goal is.
When an egg is broken from the outside force, a life ends.
But when broken from within, a life begins.
Great things always begin from within.
- Anonymous
See the difference in the above two cases of broken eggs, in which one
is broken from outside and the other is broken from inside. The outcome
in both the cases is different in fact quite different. You can see that it
was a matter of life and death. The outside world can motivate you to
some extent but to feel a permanent Yes I Can within yourself, you have
to develop the confidence that you can. The motivation from the outside
world is temporary and ends soon. The real energy will come from within
and that will be everlasting. Yes I Can perpetuates a persevering
confidence of achieving your dreams.
Success / Failure
Ye s I Ca n
No I Cannot
Nothing
-2-
What will you get if you do nothing? Of course, you will get nothing under
normal circumstances. Exceptions do happen, but the probability of such
an exception is quite low. So if you have No I Cannot attitude, then the
outcome of nothing is quite evident. Although Yes I can attitude does
not guarantee success, there is still a 50 per cent chance that the
outcome is not a failure. The outcome of an effort can either be a
success or a failure. It all depends on how much energy was behind your
effort. The failure after an effort always reminds me of a saying of the
man behind the invention of light bulb, Thomas Edison.
I have not failed.
I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
Thus failure is not at all a bad thing; it comes only to those who try.
There are occasions, when you attain success in the first attempt,
depending upon the nature of goal and definition of success. But usually
success comes to those, who keep trying. Try and dont give up because
you can succeed. Even if you have to convince someone, which seems
very easy and a task that involves only words, you have to make multiple
efforts, putting in a different logic and reasoning each time to succeed.
Lets take another approach to understand this. If you toss a coin, you
have two outcomes, a head or a tail. You can or cannot get a head in the
first attempt. If the coin is not tossed at all, there is neither a tail nor a
head. Yes I can attitude is just like tossing a coin, and getting either
success or failure.
In this regard, I would like to share a personal story. When I saw an ad of
a writing competition in the newspaper in 2007, which was entitled as
-3-
Exercises:
Toss the coin till you get heads. Note the number of attempts it
takes to get heads.
Repeat the above exercise 5 times and see the difference in the
number of attempts each time to get heads. This will help you
understand that success doesnt come on first attempt.
-7-
Strengthen Your
Yes I Can
Kick the t out of cant and then see the difference in your life. Kicking
this t is easier than kicking the ball in football as the prerequisite in the
latter would be the knowhow of football. For kicking the t, you just need
the voice inside you saying Yes I can.
This book is written to strengthen your Yes I Can passion. In the
chapters to come, the elements / principles that can strengthen your Yes
I Can passion are discussed one by one.
Now you dont have to put off the fire of achieving success within
yourself. You can now spread that fire and fuel it. The following are the
elements and principles:
1. Know Yourself: If you dont know yourself, you wouldnt know
your goals. And if you dont know your goals, you will not be
interested in achieving what you are meant to achieve. In the case
when you dont know yourself, you will extinguish the fire of Yes I
Can while in the opposite case, you will pursue your desire and
your Yes I Can passion would be stronger than ever.
2. Crush the Enemy Called Fear: Now that you have known who
you are, its time to defeat your biggest enemy, which is known as
-8-
fear. People, who know their strengths and weaknesses, use their
strengths to overcome weaknesses.
3. Nothing is impossible: After the first two points, you know your
destination and you dont have element of fear within yourself. Its
time to strengthen the belief that nothing is impossible and it will
energize you like a high voltage line.
4. Think Big and Innovative: By this time, you have developed faith
that nothing is impossible. So your thinking will not be orthodox
anymore. You can think big and innovative.
5. There Is Always a Choice: If during the thought process, you
encounter a situation that makes you think that there is no option
for you, then the faith that there is always a choice, will make you
feel that you can maneuver your life as per your desire.
6. Never Give Up Approach: After knowing yourself, defeating your
fears, believing that nothing is impossible from achieving goals and
thinking big to drafting your own life with the available choices,
there exists no reason to give up. Keep trying for the dreams and
goals till you succeed.
7. Game without Ball: You might think that when you would get time
for performing all the activities mentioned above. Game without
Ball timeslot is the time for these activities.
8. Disability is Lack of an Ability: Yes I Can is an ability and you
must use it. If you dont, this is what disability is.
-9-
Lets start the journey towards success. These eight principles and
elements are fuel for your Yes I Can passion.
- 10 -
1
Know Yourself
Who are you? is not as easy a question as it looks. The answer to this
question is a summary of what you are. Knowing yourself is not about
knowing your name, gender, age, qualification and address. It is much
more beyond that. It is to know what you were, what you are and what
you will be. You must know your likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses,
ambitions, desires, goals etc.
The Unexamined life is not worth living.
- Socrates
As an answer to this question, saying that you are a human being is not
sufficient. We are all human beings, yet we are distinguished from each
other in a lot of ways. The names are different, the faces dont resemble
with the others, the finger prints are not identical and the list of
distinguishing features continues. You should know who you are and
identify what is different in you. These distinguishing features really make
us, what we are. A painter is different from a writer, a musician is
different from a sportsman, a newscaster is different from an actor and
so on.
- 11 -
If you know the answer to the question who you are, then you would
know where you want to go in your life. The real difference between the
winner and a loser is the fact that winners craft their own lives, whereas
the losers let others create their lives. Knowing yourself is not about
looking into the mirror. People may know you from outside, but your
inside is only known to you. The sea doesnt look that deep from outside,
but there are thousands of species living beneath it. Jewel and shark
both are inside sea, what do you have inside you? Identify your
personality.
If you dont know yourself, it is like you know nothing about anything.
Everything begins from within.
In order to elaborate this point further, lets take an example of a person
who does not know who he is, where he wants to take his life, what his
likes and dislikes are, then he can never create his life. People will
persuade him to do things he never really liked or wanted to do. But
since he doesnt have knowhow about himself and has no vision, he can
get deceived easily by hearing the point of view of others. This is the
case when he is not creating his life and the thoughts of others impact
his day to day decisions and ultimately his life. He will end up in a place
which was never his destination. Then he would have two options, either
curse himself for not having know how about himself and the vision or
curse others who have impacted his life.
I was attending one of Dawn All About Lifestyles Exhibition at Expo
center, Karachi. In this exhibition, several companies set up their stalls
and performed various activities to capture the attention of visitors. The
- 12 -
more visitors one has, the more chances are there of selling the
products. It is nothing but an old marketing theory. One of the stalls was
very attractive and they were successful in capturing the attention of a lot
of visitors. The stall was of one of the leading banks of the country. This
bank was basically offering a game in which the participant had to go
blindfolded to the final post on the other side approximately 40 or 50 feet
away. It sounds easy but it was interesting to see the participants
performances. When a participant started the journey towards the post,
the crowd started shouting to divert the participant. Some said turn right,
some said turn left and the participant went off track. When the blindfold
was removed, the participants themselves were astounded to see how
much they had deviated from the path and ended up somewhere else.
Similarly, you might be aware of the game Ankh Macholi (blind man's
bluff) where one of the kids is chosen to grab other kids in a blindfolded
state. This game is common among children. The kids divert the
blindfolded kid very easily and laugh, as he or she cannot see.
The correlation of the above two examples to an adult life is that if one is
unable to see, he or she can easily be deviated and he or she can end
up in a place completely different from the desired one. When you dont
have knowledge of who you are and start acting upon what people say
then things, similar to what have happened to the blindfolded persons in
the above two examples, start happening in your life. Unfortunately,
there is no rewind button in life. Things what have happened cannot be
changed.
- 13 -
To put it in a nut shell, those, who do not have vision and career goal,
end up somewhere else as they get easily confused from the point of
view of other people.
Would you tell me please which way I ought to go from here?
That depends a good deal on where you want to go to,
said the Cat
I dont much care where said Alice
Then it doesnt matter which way you go, said the Cat
This quote (from Alices Adventures in Wonderland) emphasizes the
importance of goal setting, which you cannot do unless you know about
yourself.
Even when you go out, for instance shopping, you have your destination
and the purpose in mind. Here destination means the market from where
you can buy a product, which is your purpose. You wouldnt say that you
will wander here and there till you find an unknown product from an
unknown place. Without destination and purpose, you cannot go to the
place where you wanted to go and have the thing that you wanted to
have. The combination of destination and purpose is your goal.
Consider another example to stress on this fact. Suppose you were the
lucky person, who has been given opportunity to fly anywhere free of
cost. You left Dubai without having destination in your mind. You were
unknown to the purpose of your travel and your destination. Lets
assume that your interest was to go to Singapore but you were not
aware of this. Since you had no destination in your mind then there is a
- 14 -
- 15 -
The winners have a different way of leading a life. They create their own
lives and never deviate from the destination they have in their mind as
they have set goals in life accordingly.
As an external examiner at engineering university and an Assistant
Manager, I have conducted viva examinations and interviews of
approximately 500 students and graduates. In these interactions, I
noticed that students introduction comprises of two sentences name
and information regarding class or degree, which of course is not a good
introduction. This shows that they dont know themselves. This two line
introduction shows three things.
Firstly, the person that has not accomplished anything in the past that is
worth mentioning and this predicts that he / she is not going to
accomplish anything worth mentioning in the future as well. Remember,
the past predicts your future. If you have not put in any efforts in the past,
this shows your lack of motivation, vision and efforts. The remedy to it is
to participate in extracurricular activities actively.
Secondly, this reflects that you dont have any knowhow regarding
yourself. If you would have known yourself, then your introduction
wouldnt have comprised of two sentences. Show the world that you
know yourself well. If you dont know yourself then how can you say that
you know the other things?
Thirdly, it reflects that there is nothing significant in your life besides
being a student of xyz class or a graduate. There are various things
going in the life of a student as well. Consider my introduction as My
- 16 -
- 17 -
Exercises:
List down 10 things that you like and dislike.
List down 10 of your strengths and weaknesses.
Prepare a career statement like that of John Stanford (mentioned
in the chapter).
- 18 -
2
Crush the Enemy Called
Fear
When you decide to reach your destination, what is the first thing you do
after the thought process? Its taking the first step. So after knowing who
you are, you must take the first step towards achieving what you want in
your life.
Have you seen a child taking his first step? His first step is cherished by
the family members. All smiles at the first step of a child because this is
in real terms the start of his or her life. The first step is the indication that
he or she has begun the journey of life.
Similarly, when one takes the first step in the way of the destination
(determined by goals), the journey begins. No matter how far the
destination is, the first step makes it one step closer. The first step is
followed by second step and after you have taken the second step, the
destination is two steps closer. After second step, there is third step and
the journey gets started. The first step is an indication that the
destination is getting nearer. No matter how far the journey is, it
begins by taking the first step.
- 19 -
- 21 -
Keep on trying and dont worry about the mistakes. It is the output that
counts, not the mistakes. During the construction phase of a building,
several mistakes happen. But masons correct those and what you see at
the end is a beautiful edifice. I have a list of my achievements, but I dont
have a list of the mistakes that I made in my life. Have you seen any CV
in which the mistakes of an individual are highlighted? CV only shows
achievement, and in fact achievement is one of things that the recruiters
look for.
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable,
but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
- George Bernard Shaw
C. Fear of Embarrassment:
Fear of embarrassment commonly comes in the form of the question
What will people think or say? Simple answer to this question is dont
think what people will think about an effort you made. Did you give them
the right to comment on all things you do?
I am sharing this book with readers. If I was fearful, I wouldnt have
published this book. If one keeps on writing and lets no one read
because of fear then what would the use of writing be. People are better
writers than me and have amusing talent and concepts but they are
afraid to send their stuff for publication because they think that it is not up
to the mark. What will other think and say after reading my piece of
writing? Let me tell you frankly, if I hadnt sent my writings to the
newspapers, I would have zero publication till now. if I hadnt shown this
book to someone, you wouldnt have been reading it. had I been afraid to
- 22 -
take the first step, this book would have been in a shelf at my bedroom in
a draft.
Almost everything all external expectations, all pride, all fear of
embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of
death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you
are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking
you have something to lose.
- Steve Jobs
Just look around, you will find that people who laugh at others are in fact
not doing anything themselves in life. They cannot really see you
progressing. This fun making, which you take as embarrassment, is in
fact jealousy at their end.
A word of advice, use your strengths to overcome the weaknesses you
have. Fear is a weakness, which is not invincible.
Exercises:
What do you fear in your life?
Is your output too much dependent on what people will think or
say? Rate on the scale of 1-5 (1 for least and 5 for most).
- 23 -
3
Nothing is Impossible
You might have heard people say that it was impossible to achieve. Why
do they think that it was impossible? Each problem has a solution
because Impossible says I-M-Possible.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says Im possible
- Audrey Hepburn
If you pronounce the words possible and impossible, which word would
take more energy? Saying possible is easier than saying impossible
and also it is energy efficient. Then why do people say its
IMPOSSIBLE. Why do we waste more energy in saying longer word
impossible? Why not put the extra energy in achieving something?
Nothing is impossible is also an Islamic faith. Allah has provided
solution to all the problems and cure to all the diseases. Prophet
Muhammad PBUH said on the subject:
There is no disease that Allah has sent without
sending down its treatment.
- 24 -
If no disease is incurable, then how can any other thing on this planet be
impossible? What makes you think that its impossible? It is only your
thinking that convinces you that it is impossible for you to achieve it. If
you think you can then definitely you can!
Anything the mind of a man can conceive and believe,
it can achieve.
Napoleon Hill
There are so many dangerous activities in the world, like fire fighting,
mountain climbing, space journey, deep sea diving, bungee jumping,
rock climbing etc. Are you doing anything that is tougher than these?
Then how can you say that it is IMPOSSIBLE to achieve it? Just think!
Consider the following few examples. These examples will make you
believe that nothing is impossible.
Had Boom Boom Shahid Afridi thought of making a century in less than
40 balls in One Day International (ODI) cricket match as impossible, he
would never have scored worlds fastest century in just 37 balls against
Srilanka in 1996.
Had the Pakistani mountain climber, Nazir Sabir thought that it is
impossible for a Pakistani to climb Mount Everest, he would never have
climbed it and consequently could never have become the first Pakistani
to climb the worlds highest peak.
Pakistani Athlete, Naseem Hameed became the fastest woman in South
Asia when she won a gold medal in the 100 meter event of the 11th
- 25 -
South Asian Federation Games in Dhaka in 2010. Could she attain this
position if she had thought its impossible?
If Imran Khan had thought that it was impossible for team Pakistan to win
the World Cup then team Pakistan would never have won its first World
Cup in 1992.
Ali Moeen Nawazish, a Pakistani student, was the first in the world to do
23 A Level subjects, while achieving the highest marks in 22 of them.
Had he thought it to be an impossible feat, he would never have
achieved this amazing result.
No mountain is too high, no river is too wide, no desert is too vast, if you
want to go beyond it.
Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people
not smart enough to know they were impossible.
- Doug Larson
I would never have secured the first position in the engineering program,
if I had not tried to get it. I would then have been an average student. But
due to my hard work and the faith that nothing is impossible, I achieved
my target.
When I joined IBA, People said that being an engineer, it wouldnt be
possible for me to shine in a business program. But thanks to Almighty
Allah that I have been mentioned in the Deans list of distinguished
students. This was possible only because I didnt think it to impossible.
- 26 -
- 27 -
List down 5 things that you think are impossible for you to achieve.
Are they really impossible or are they saying individually that I-MPossibe. Why do you think they are impossible?
- 28 -
4
Think Big and Innovative
I find many people around us, everyday, who are committed to
revert back to the ultimate creator, and return Him the gift of mind,
completely unused!
- Sohail Zindani
So here it goes. Put aside the innovation and thinking big, a lot of people
dont use their mind at all and give it to the God, after their death
completely unused. You can easily find these sorts of people around you
every day. There is a big difference in thinking and thinking big. All
individuals, other than the kind of people mentioned by Sohail Zindani in
his book Common Sense at Work, think but only successful people think
big. Thinking also involves dreaming. There is a difference between a
dreamer and a person who has big dreams, the dreamer sleeps while
the person who has big dreams wakes up and achieves the dreams.
I was always fascinated by the thought of how electric gadgets work.
Whenever I saw an electric toy in my childhood days, I would wonder
how it worked. One question that always pricked me was how a wall
socket or battery produced electricity.
- 29 -
- 33 -
Had the Wright Bros not come up with the idea of airplane, could we
think of flying from the East to the West within a few hours? Similar is the
case of telephone, which was invented by Alexander Gharam Bell. We
couldnt have entered such advanced era of communication without this
invention. We should be thankful to Thomas Edison, who invented the
light bulb. Without light bulb, we would have been living in darkness. The
list of inventors and great thinkers is infinite. Success comes to those
who think.
Allama Iqbal, the great poet and philosopher of the Indian Sub Continent,
thought about the independent Muslim state which Muslims got under
the leadership of Quaid-e-Azam Muhammad Ali Jinnah. What would
have happened if he had not thought about the Muslim state?
Allah also wants us to think. The Holy Quran says on this subject:
And among His Signs is this that He created for you mates from
among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and
He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are
Signs for those who Think and Reflect. [30:21]
We have sent down unto thee the Message; that you may explain
clearly to men what is sent for them, and that they may Think and
Reflect! [16:44]
Sir Ken Robinson said in an inspiring speech at a TechnologyEntertainment-Design (Ted) convention The times in which we live
and the complex challenges that lie ahead demand that we
challenge the way we think. We indeed need innovative solutions to
- 34 -
the problems in this era. If I can drive my car, log-in to my social media
site, listen to the music, eat the food, then why on earth should I ask for
your solutions to my problems. Does it make sense? Obviously not! I
accept the fact that there are some situations in life where one has to ask
for support from others, but if a person cannot solve his problems all the
time, he needs to develop problem solving skills rather than getting
dependent on others. No one can take someone with him or her
everywhere to take the decisions on his or her behalf. The decision
ultimately depends on ones ability to think.
Decision making is a very important area and without dominating this
area, one cannot succeed in his or her life. Take the example of a
cricket, the most successful batsman is the one who can place the shots
according to the balls the bowler bowls. If he goes against the line of the
ball, he can get out instead of scoring runs. What makes him place his
strokes as per the balls and fielders placement? Its his decision making
skills. Similarly, the bowler balls as per field placing and considering the
abilities of the batsmen. You might have seen several matches where
the decision has taken place at the final over of the second innings.
Sometimes the bowling side wins, while at others, the batting side
emerges victorious. The one who wins is the better decision maker.
Thats why I, in my writing and discussions, always put emphasis on
sports because it enhances decision making skills and stimulates
thought process.
Last thing to consider in this chapter is based on the beautiful thought of
Shakespeare that Nothing is good or bad, it is thinking that makes it
so. This saying highlights the importance of thought. If you are a positive
- 35 -
thinker, then you could see even the negative things as positive. But if
you are a pessimist, then you would look at the whole world with a
negative point of view. Change your paradigm. You are here on this
planet for just a few days. Dont waste time in negative thoughts.
Exercises:
Which is the best decision you have taken in your life?
What does your mind mostly think about?
Do you dream?
- 36 -
5
There is Always a Choice
Professor Stanford has spoiled my day. He has given me a B-grade in
my assignment. This is a students comment when he sees his result
and spoils his mood.
My boss has taken the credit of my work. What an unfortunate person I
am. Now I will not work well. My day is spoiled. A hard-working subordinate says this when he sees his boss taking the credit for his work.
His mood is ruined.
Cant you buy me a new diamond set? Have you seen Lubnas set. Her
husband gifted it on her birthday and by the way, he earns lesser than
you. You are the worst husband in the world. This is a wifes comment
and that turns her husband off.
We come to hear similar statements in our society very frequently. It
seems that the easiest job in this world is to spoil ones mood and to
blame it on the remarks of a teacher, boss, wife or someone else.
As a matter of fact, nobody in this world can make you sad except you.
Dont believe in what I am saying? We basically deceive ourselves by
- 37 -
blaming others for upsetting us. We think that husband, wife, brother,
sister, boss, teacher, or friend has ruined our mood. In fact we have
chosen to spoil our mood. You had two choices in the reaction of what
others have said or done to spoil your mood or not to spoil your mood.
Positive and negative thoughts are made in your brain. In a reaction, if
you have chosen to produce a negative thought then your mood would
be ruined. If you have chosen to produce a positive thought then you
would have been happy. The choice is always yours.
On an Eid day, the Kurta, I had to wear, got marks during ironing. I had
two choices, either to spoil the day or to forget the marks on it and cheer
the auspicious occasion. I chose the latter.
Remember, for every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of
happiness. These sixty seconds can never come back, no matter how
much you try. Above all, these could be the last sixty seconds of your
life. So dont ruin even a second of your life.
Anyone who angers you conquers you.
- Elizabeth Kenny
A lot of people complain If I were born in America, I would have been
more successful, If I were an engineer, I would have designed the
tallest building in the world or If I were born in 20th century, my life
would have been much easier. Basically they are the ones who have
chosen to complain and do nothing. We should remember that nobody in
this world can make a brand new start and correct the wrong things. In
deed we have to focus on the end as we can make a brand new end by
- 38 -
doing things which can make our dreams come true. Again its a matter
of choice. It looks strange but its true.
I was once asked in the interview What would you like to do different in
your life if you have been given life again. Yes I would like to do one
thing differently but I cannot make it a reason for giving up my future. I
have worked hard day in and day out to get rid of that thing as I believe
that I cannot make a brand new start, but yes I can make a brand new
end.
The difference between a successful person and a loser is in making
choice. The successful person chooses to live a successful life and a
loser chooses to live an unsuccessful life.
Take an example of a cricket match. The toss preempts the match but
has a lot of impact on the outcome of the match. The team, which losses
the toss, follows the decision of the captain winning the toss. In 2011
world cup, Pakistan had lost the toss against Australia in the last group
match. Ricky Ponting, the Australian captain, made a decision to bat first.
We all know that team Pakistan is not a good chaser of runs while
playing second, but Shahid Afridi and the team mates did not let this
element influence them. They worked hard and restricted Australia to a
less than 200 score and chased the target. The outcome of the match
was in favor of Pakistan even after losing the toss and not batting first. In
this case, Shahid Afridi had a choice either to work hard and restrict
the Australian team to a lower score so that his team could chase or
make losing the toss and batting second an excuse for losing the match.
- 39 -
It was up to him, but he made a choice to win and when this choice is
made all you have to do is to try till you win.
There are people who dont do anything for their future, but they keep on
cursing their past. This is again their choice. They could have done a lot
in their future. But all they have chosen is to cry over spilt milk. This is
not at all an intelligent choice. Past, however dull and unpromising, is
complete. This chapter of your biography is complete. The future is yet to
come and you have to write this chapter. Dont let others (including your
past) write this chapter.
The choice is very crucial; I came to know when I started investment in
stock market. The choice of shares you make will result in profit or loss
for you. The timing you choose for buying / selling is very critical. It is a
game of choice and decision. Decision is in fact your choice keeping all
the parameters in mind.
The choice factor also segregates the reactive and proactive people. The
reactive people, who react after an incident, dont have option and are
left with saying I must do this. This is not a choice; this is now the only
option left. The effective people are proactive people and they say I
choose to do this. The following are simple examples:
Proactive People
Reactive People
Writing
it tomorrow.
Proactive People
I chose to complete the
Reactive People
I have to complete this
Assignment
Submission
due in an hour.
Exercises:
List down 5 choices that you have made today and analyze the
impact of these choices on your day.
List down the other options you had in the 5 choices you have
made today and imagine the impact of these choices on your day.
Did you make the right choices?
- 43 -
6
Never Give Up Approach
It does not matter how slowly you go
as long as you do not stop.
- Confucius
The above quote reminds me of the famous tortoise and hare story, in
which the tortoise wind due to continuous effort and never give-up
approach. We have been brought up, listening to this story. How can we
forget the moral of the story, which is nothing but never give up
approach?
You might have seen football games in which the team which is down by
one goal tries to score equalizer. The players keep on crossing the
central line and attacking the goal area. Sometimes they are successful
and sometimes their efforts turn out to be abortive. What is the lesson in
these attempts? Just try and keep trying till you succeed. If the players
dont try for the equalizer, will they get one? Certainly not!
A similar example, consider the game of cricket. If the team batting
second requires 20 runs in the last over, how on earth can they win?
- 44 -
Simply by trying to hit big shots, right? If the batsmen dont try, the team
can never win. By trying to hit fours and sixes, the team can win. This is
another example of never give up approach till you succeed.
Lets take another example. A person who is drowning in swimming pool
will have two options one is to drown calmly without making any effort
to save his life and second is to try to come out of water alive. Which of
these options should he opt for if he wants to come out of water? By
putting in no effort or by trying? Sometimes trying hard is not just to get
successful, but it becomes a matter of life or death as in this example.
Take the example of Aisam ul Haq Qureshi the tennis star from
Pakistan. He started his international single ranking as an unknown
player. There is no international tournament of Tennis in Pakistan.
Despite these facts, he didnt give up. Gradually he managed to get up in
the international ranking and played the final of US Open, the grand
slam, twice. Nobody could have thought that the person belonging to the
country, where no international tennis tournament takes place, will
qualify for the final of grand slam twice. This was only possible due to his
hard work and never give up approach. In 2011, he jumped to the 8th
position in doubles rankings.
We all remember the six of Javed Miadad in Sarjah, UAE against India in
1986 at the last ball of the match, when four runs were required. Before
the last ball, he had two choices, to give up and accept defeat against
India or to fight and not to give up. He chose the latter and played a
stroke that cleared the boundary and resulted in the victory for Pakistan.
- 45 -
was sure that I would be accepted for the internship program at the
organization of my choice.
A few days later, I noticed an announcement on the notice board
regarding one of the companies I had shortlisted. It said that the
interested students should send their resume to that organization via
Department of Industrial Liaison (DIL), which is designated for placement
of students at various organizations. At the bottom of the notice, the
email address and phone number of the HR Manager of the company
was mentioned. I submitted my CV to DIL, which was supposed to send
it to the HR Manager of that organization as per the notice. Everything
was going smoothly when the twist came during the placement process.
Two of my friends received calls from that organization, but I didnt. It
was a bolt out of the blue for me. To find out the cause of rejection, I
contacted DIL. Their response was that they never dispatched the CVs
due to delay in signing by the head of the department on the cover letter.
If this was true, I wondered how my classmates got the offer. I asked
them how they had sent the CVs. The answer from both of them was that
they had sent the CVs directly to the HR Manger on the email address
mentioned on the notice.
This was strange; the letter said that the CVs should only be sent via
DIL. Now if I had accepted the result of this outcome as a decision of my
fate, then I would have lost this internship opportunity. But it is rightly
said that the successful person makes his own fate. I decided not to give
up. I called at the number of the HR Manager and spoke to her. Also I
emailed her regarding the issue.
deadline during which she had only received some resumes at her email
- 47 -
address and the candidates were selected on merit basis from those
CVs. I explained my point of view to her that I had submitted resume to
DIL, as per the notice. But the resume couldnt reach her due to delay by
DIL. I had the best merit among them. She accepted that whatever had
happened was neither her nor my fault. The problem was that the
organization wanted only two interns and they had been selected on
merit. After my discussion with her, she talked to the Director of DIL and
to the management of her company. After these discussions, she
contacted me and said We are delighted to see your interest in our
company. Since we have selected two interns, it would be unjustified to
cancel their internship after sending them the official letters. But you
were missed due to the delay from DIL. To resolve the issue, we are
happy to select you as an intern as well. Now we will have three
internees for our Karachi office. Here comes the success. Had I given
up earlier, I would have missed the opportunity.
This internship was a great experience. I met some really good
professionals
there
and
experienced
professional
working
- 48 -
The process was quite simple. Every university in the list (issued by the
multinational) had to nominate the top two engineering students of the
batch, one from electrical department and the other from electronics
department. I was nominated from the electrical department due to the
highest cumulative percentage in four years. Another guy was nominated
from the electronics department for the same reason. The graduate who
had higher percentage between the two was supposed to get the gold
medal. I knew from the selection criteria that my marks were slightly
lesser than the electronics graduate but I was not ready to give up. I got
the email address of the contact person for this award and wrote him the
following email:
Dear Sir,
This
is
with
reference
to
your
undersigned
letter
to
the NED University, Karachi regarding the nomination for "Gold Medals"
that your company institutes for the outstanding performers in the field of
Electrical and Electronics Engineering from Engineering Universities
of Pakistan. I am one of the two nominations NED has sent to you.
Through this letter I would like to appreciate the idea of conferring this
award which acknowledges the remarkable achievement of an individual.
The award is of great worth to me. Your company is an ardent supporter
of university education in Pakistan as it offers scholarships as well as
award gold medals to the best engineering students. It is a market leader
being operational across the globe and is included in Fortune 500
companies. The award by such an organization for the achievement of
an individual is highly ranked. For an individual, this award is source of
- 49 -
- 51 -
- 52 -
7
Game without Ball
Have you seen a football match? I guess you have. But you wouldnt
have analyzed it the way I will. In a football match, there are 11 players
at each side. Thus total 22 players play the match. The match is of 90
minutes, comprising of two halves of 45 minutes each. If you apply
mathematics to the match, you will come to know that on average a
player gets ball for only 4 minutes per match. This means that each
player is without ball for 86 minutes during the entire match. Since a
player is without ball most of the time in a football match, the behavior of
the player without ball is more important than how he behaves with the
ball. This is Game without ball principle. Before this analysis, you might
be thinking that the player is with the ball most of the time, but that is not
true.
Now consider this principle in a normal persons life. Every person gets
24 hours a day, no one gets more, no one gets less. If we exclude 8
hours of sleeping, then 16 hours are left in a day. These 16 hours are at
his disposal, he can use them as he likes. If he is a student, his routine
would be to leave for school / college at 0700 hrs and come back home
by 1400 hrs. How much time is he left with now? Its simple to calculate.
Since he has utilized at maximum 7 hrs for schooling out of available 16
- 53 -
hours, he is left with 9 hours. This is the largest chunk of the day
available to him in comparison to 8 hours for sleeping and 7 hours for
schooling. Therefore, it is very important how he spends this time.
Now consider a university going student. An average student leaves for
university from his home at around 0800 hrs and comes back home at
around 1600hrs. How many hours does this make? 8 hours! The
remaining 8 hours are there to be utilized in a day. This student has
three equal segments of 8 hours.
Lets consider the life of a working person. The office timings are usually
9 to 5. Thats 8 hours. Lets add 1 hour for traveling. That means 9 hours.
Now one is left with 7 hours of spare time.
What all these people do in the spare time? We usually think that the
time other than sleeping and school / office is negligible, but in reality it is
not and has been proved that it is a very big segment of a day. This is
not 10 percent of a day. You can see yourself that this segment is pretty
large. In case of a school going student, its 37.5 per cent of a day. In
case of a university going student, its 33.33 per cent and for an
employed person its 29.2 per cent. I have compiled this book in this 29.2
per cent of time that I had per day.
Now lets shed some light on what we do in this Game without Ball
segment. During my interactions with students during viva and job
recruiting interviews, I have found that most of these youngsters dont do
anything useful in their spare time. Some do utilize this segment. Most of
them said that they dont have spare time after studies. Are they studying
- 54 -
all the 8 hours at home? Certainly not! Although some spare time in a
day should be specifically reserved for recreational activities but you
cannot justify that you watch movies or surf facebook during the entire
recreational segment. Recreation could also be something worthy. I have
also been logging into facebook a lot, but that was a supplemental
activity as I was writing this book on my notebook and was connected to
internet all the time, but facebook was not my primary activity.
Why not make most of Game without Ball timeslot?
There are several reasons why people dont attempt anything useful in
this slot.
Firstly, we dont have a culture of going an extra mile. We are satisfied
with what we are assigned. One of the reasons is that we dont have a
goal, already covered in the earlier chapter. We dont accept things
unless things are imposed on us. We see schools as jails. We go to
office with our faces down. You must develop passion for going an extra
mile.
Secondly, a lot of people dont do something good enough as they are
quite concerned about making mistakes. Making mistakes while
attempting a positive task is better than doing nothing and wasting your
time.
To avoid situations in which you might make mistakes may be the
biggest mistake of all.
- Peter McWilliams
- 55 -
You know well that all the human beings are eating the food that is
produced in this world. If a person is eating the resource of this world
and is doing nothing then this person is a burden on this planet. We want
productive people. Sitting idle and attempting to do something even if
you commit mistakes is commendable. Remember nobody is perfect and
being human, we have a tendency of making mistakes.
I have done several mistakes in my life and have learnt lessons from
them. My life has improved due to those experiences. You should also
try, no matter how many mistakes you make. Its the attempt and passion
that counts, not the mistakes. At the end of the day, we all have a list of
accomplishments, not a list of mistakes.
What can you do in Game without Ball timeslot?
You can do a lot of activities in this useful timeslot. Some of them are as
follows:
Books are a mans best friend. So you can read books on the topics that
interest you. The selection should not be limited to the course topics.
Remember, this is a Game without Ball timeslot, so choose the topics
that interest you, ranging from novels to poetries and biographies to
discoveries. Picking a good magazine or newspaper is also an option.
Reading enhances the imagination power. You can dream better, after
reading books. Books on motivational topic or self-improvement can
really change your life. Try it and see for yourself.
You can also do something creative, like painting, writing, gardening,
composing music, poetry and so on. Each of these activities will not only
- 56 -
provide recreation, but will also help you get some credit. Why wouldnt
anyone praise you after seeing a good painting that has been done by
you? Why wouldnt you get reward for planting a tree that will produce
some fresh oxygen and reduce pollution?
You can enhance your skill set. If you are good at mathematics, you can
do some challenging assignment on it. If you are good at painting, you
can paint much better paintings than what you already have. If you are
an author, you can write even more and you can improve your writing
skills.
You can socialize and network in game without ball timeslot. This
socializing and networking shouldnt be limited to social networking sites.
Meet people face to face. Its entirely different when you talk to a person
face to face. A friends company is better in the real world than on the
virtual world.
Going out with friends or family is a recreational activity on one hand,
while its good for enhancing the affection in the relationship on the other
hand. You can go out to a peaceful place such as a park or seashore or
for tracking, long drive or dinner etc. You can also go to places where
you can learn something useful such as museums, art galleries,
exhibitions, theaters etc.
A sound mind in the sound body is an old adage. You can do physical
exercise like jogging, cycling etc in the game without ball timeslot and
keep yourself healthy.
- 57 -
Helping others is also what you can do. Help your mom, dad, siblings,
friends and relatives. Iqbal couplet in this regard is
Hein log wahe jahan mein ache,
Aate hein jo kaam dosroon kay
(Translation: Good people help others)
The above mentioned activities are just a guideline. There are so many
other useful things that one can do. Last but not the least, you can keep
on giving yourself challenging tasks in this time slot, which can make you
improve your skills and go an extra mile. I prepared training materials in
this slot and delivered it in Learning Extravaganza event, which helped
me in improving my presentation skills and I also got to know what it
feels like to be a trainer.
Exercises:
List down 10 things that you do in your Game without Ball time
slot. Are these activities effective?
Analyze what you could do in this time slot to enhance your
productivity and skills?
Do you help people or like to be assisted?
- 58 -
8
Disability is Lack of an
Ability
The orthodox definition of disability is the lack of a body part or an organ.
But from the point of view of a successful person, disability is not the lack
of body part, its lack of an ability. It could be the ability to grow, to try
again and again, to deliver, to produce significant results and so on. Yes
I can is also an ability that enables you to achieve your goals and
success.
If you really believe in the orthodox definition of disability, then to change
your paradigm, one of the most prominent examples is of Nick Vujicic,
who was born in Australia in 1982 without limbs and legs. Can you
imagine him doing anything in life if you consider him on the basis of
orthodox definition of disability? But he went ahead and achieved more
glory and success than those who are privileged to have a healthy body.
I personally admire him a lot and he is a great source of inspiration to
me. There are several people in the world I want to meet in my life and
Nick is one of them.
- 59 -
This inspiration is from the first time I saw his video on youtube. In that
particular video, he demonstrated the principle of trying again and again
till one succeeds. I cannot forget him saying I will try 100 times to get up
and if I fail 100 times, if I fail and I give up, do you think I am ever gonna
get up? No! But if I fail and try again and again but I just want you to
know that its not the end. It matters how you gonna finish. Are you
gonna finish strong? You will find the strength to get back up.
Nick can do tremendous tasks even without hands and feet such as he
can type on a computer, throw tennis balls, play drum pedals, comb his
hair, brush his teeth, answer the phone, shave and get himself a glass of
water. Do you think its impossible? Just google Nick Vujicic and see the
results.
Nick graduated with a double major in Accounting and Financial
Planning. At the time of graduation, he was 21 years old. How many
people with no disability get a double major or formal education till
graduation? Nick has strong faith in Nothing is Impossible principle and
that has been his driving force.
The discussion of Nick Vujicic has indeed changed your paradigm and
now an orthodox definition of disability is not valid for you. Look for your
- 60 -
Everyon
ne of us is
i endow
wed with at least one God
d-given talent.
t
Everryone mu
ust devellop confidence to
o cherish
h that gifft
and
d use it proudly.
p
-C
Camille Lavington
L
n
Wha
at is you
ur Natura
al Talent?
?
Iden
ntify yourr natural talent and
a
polish
h it. It will
w help yyou achie
eve yourr
goa
als. Some
e of the na
atural tale
ents are mentione
ed as follo
ows:
is what my definition of disability is. Even if you have one and you are not
using it, it is also a type of disability.
Go ahead and discover your hidden talents.
Exercises:
Identify your natural talent.
Are you using your natural talent? If yes, how and when? If not,
then why are you not using it?
Do you need to polish your talent?
- 62 -
Final Words
Thank you for choosing to bring improvement in your life. After reading
this book, you must have fueled your passion of Yes I Can. Try to
implement, what you have read, in your life and see the results.
Whatever you do, the power of prayer cannot be put aside. The first thing
that I do in the morning is thanking Allah for giving me another day in life
and then praying. Just say a single minute prayer in the morning
regarding whatever you want to achieve that day. Allah will be with you.
A minute out of 1440 minutes (24 hours x 60 minutes) is not at all a
significant time. But this one minute can change the outcome of your
day.
Never underestimate your potentials. Abraham Lincoln said:
No man is good enough to be president,
but someone has to be.
You can become a president or can get yourself to any position and
designation. Kick the t out of cant. Start your journey towards success.
In the end of this book, I would like to share a story adapted from The
Star Thrower by Loren Eiseley. This story has an amazing moral and
would motivate the reader to bring positive change in the lives of others.
You should think about other people on this planet. Help others and
make this world a better place to live in.
- 63 -
Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to
do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began
his work.
One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach
and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at
the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked
faster to catch up.
As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and
that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was
reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them
into the ocean.
He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is
that you are doing?"
The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into
the ocean."
"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked
the somewhat startled wise man.
To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If
I don't throw them in, they'll die."
Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you
- 64 -
not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish
all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and
threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "I made a difference
to that one!"
I hope this book has created some difference in your life.
- 65 -
- 66 -
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