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www.GoodMenProject.com
By
Helen
Peppe
͞EĞǀĞƌƵŶĚĞƌĞƐƟŵĂƚĞƚŚĞ
ƉŽǁĞƌŽĨƚĞƐƚŽƐƚĞƌŽŶĞ͕͟
the
endocrinologist
told
us.
His
tone
was
grave,
no
longer
the
there’s-‐nothing-‐to-‐worry-‐about
jocular-‐
ity
he’d
had
when
Alex
was
in
the
room,
laughing
and
making
jokes
about
successful
short
men.
Now
ĐĂŵĞƚŚĞǁĂƌŶŝŶŐƐ͕ƚŽůĚŝŶƚŚĞƉƌŽƉŚĞƐLJŝŶŐŐůŽŽŵŽĨĂŵĞĚŝĐĂůŽƌĂĐůĞ͘dŚĞƉĞĚŝĂƚƌŝĐƐƉĞĐŝĂůŝƐƚůĞŌĂŶĚ
ƌĞƚƵƌŶĞĚƋƵŝĐŬůLJǁŝƚŚƚǁŽĐŚĂŝƌƐƚŚĂƚŚĞƉůĂĐĞĚďĞƐŝĚĞƚŚĞĞdžĂŵŝŶĂƟŽŶƚĂďůĞ͘tĞƐĂƚ͕ŵLJŚƵƐďĂŶĚĂŶĚ
I,
the
parents
of
the
boy
who
exhibited
symptoms
of
age
beyond
his
years.
dŚĞĚŽĐƚŽƌůĞĂŶĞĚĂŐĂŝŶƐƚƚŚĞĐŽƵŶƚĞƌ͘,ĞǁĂƐDŝĐŚĂĞů:͘&ŽdžͲƐŚŽƌƚ͕ĐŽŶĮĚĞŶƚĚĞƐƉŝƚĞŚŝƐƐƚĂƚƵƌĞ͘,Ğ
ƉĂƵƐĞĚƚŽůŽŽŬŵĞƐƚƌĂŝŐŚƚŝŶƚŚĞĞLJĞ͕ĂƐŝĨ/ǁŽƵůĚĚŽƵďƚŚŝƐǁŽƌĚƐƵŶůĞƐƐŚĞƐƚĂƌĞĚǀĞƌLJĮƌŵůLJĂƚ
ŵĞ͘͞ŽŶŽƚ͕ƵŶĚĞƌĂŶLJĐŝƌĐƵŵƐƚĂŶĐĞƐ͕ĞǀĞƌůĞĂǀĞLJŽƵƌƐŽŶĂůŽŶĞǁŝƚŚĂŐŝƌů͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕ǁƌŝƟŶŐŽŶŚŝƐ
clipboard
as
he
talked.
“ There
could
be
serious
consequences.
A
big
complicated
embarrassing
mess
ƚŚĂƚĐŽƵůĚĂīĞĐƚŚŝƐǁŚŽůĞůŝĨĞ͘ŶĚLJŽƵƌƐ͘,ĞĐĂŶŐĞƚĂŐŝƌůƉƌĞŐŶĂŶƚ͘,ĞǁŝůůŶŽƚŚĞƐŝƚĂƚĞŝĨŐŝǀĞŶƚŚĞ
opportunity.”
I
laughed.
Had
he
just
said
that
my
9-‐year-‐old
boy
could
get
a
girl
pregnant?
It
was
our
fourth
visit
in
a
month
to
the
Maine
Pediatrics
Clinic
in
Portland,
but
I
was
only
just
beginning
to
grasp
what
the
ĚŽĐƚŽƌƐǁĞƌĞƚĞůůŝŶŐŵĞͶƚŚĂƚůĞdžƐƵīĞƌĞĚĨƌŽŵĐĞŶƚƌĂůƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJ͕ĂĐŽŶĚŝƟŽŶǁŚĞƌĞƐĞdžƵĂů
ŵĂƚƵƌĂƟŽŶŚĂƉƉĞŶƐďĞĨŽƌĞĂŐĞϭϭŝŶďŽLJƐĂŶĚϭϬŝŶŐŝƌůƐ͘dŚĞůĂƐƚƚŚŝƌƚLJĚĂLJƐŚĂĚďĞĞŶĂĨĞƐƟǀĂůŽĨ
tests:
blood
work
checking
thyroid,
testosterone
and
DHEA
levels,
ultra
sounds,
MRI
and
CT
scans,
ďŽŶĞyͲƌĂLJƐ͕ĂŶĚƌĞƉĞĂƚĞĚƉŚLJƐŝĐĂůĞdžĂŵŝŶĂƟŽŶƐ͘͞zŽƵĂƌĞǀĞƌLJĨŽƌƚƵŶĂƚĞƚŚĂƚLJŽƵŚŽŵĞƐĐŚŽŽů͕͟ŚĞ
ĐŽŶƟŶƵĞĚ͕ůŽŽŬŝŶŐĂƚŵLJŚƵƐďĂŶĚ͕ƌŝĐ͕ƐŽŵĞŽŶĞǁŚŽǁĂƐŝŶƟŵĂƚĞǁŝƚŚƚĞƐƚŽƐƚĞƌŽŶĞ͛ƐďƌĂǁŶ͘͞/ƚǁŝůů
ůŝŵŝƚŚŝƐĞdžƉŽƐƵƌĞƚŽŐŝƌůƐĂƐǁĞůůĂƐůŝŵŝƚƉŽƚĞŶƟĂůůLJĂŐŐƌĞƐƐŝǀĞƐŝƚƵĂƟŽŶƐ͘EŽƚƚŽŵĞŶƟŽŶƚŚĞƚĞĂƐŝŶŐ
and
his
own
comfort
level.”
dŚĞĚŽĐƚŽƌƉĂƵƐĞĚƚŚŽƵŐŚƞƵůůLJ͕ŚŝƐƉĞŶƐƵƐƉĞŶĚĞĚĂďŽǀĞŚŝƐŶŽƚĞƐ͘/ǁŽŶĚĞƌĞĚŝĨŚĞǁĂƐǁƌŝƟŶŐ
ƐŽŵĞƚŚŝŶŐůŝŬĞŵŽƚŚĞƌĨĂŝůƐƚŽƐĞĞƚŚĞƐĞƌŝŽƵƐŶĞƐƐŽĨƚŚĞƐŝƚƵĂƟŽŶ͘,ĞǁĞŶƚŽŶ͘͞zŽƵŵŝŐŚƚǁĂŶƚƚŽ
ĐŽŶƐŝĚĞƌƚŚĞƌĂƉLJ͕͟ŚĞƚŽůĚƵƐ͘/ƉŝĐƚƵƌĞĚůĞdž͕ǁŚŽǁĂƐǁĂŝƟŶŐŽƵƚƐŝĚĞƚŚĞƌŽŽŵ͕ƚƌLJŝŶŐƚŽĞĂǀĞƐĚƌŽƉ
like
Samwise
Gamgee
beneath
Frodo’s
window.
Therapy?
For
whom?
tĞŬŶĞǁůĞdžǁĂƐĂĚǀĂŶĐĞĚŝŶƚĞůůĞĐƚƵĂůůLJĨŽƌŚŝƐĂŐĞ͘,Ğ͛ĚůĞĂƌŶĞĚƚŽƌĞĂĚĂƚϰĂŶĚǁĂƐƌĞĂĚŝŶŐĂƚƚŚĞ
ŚŝŐŚƐĐŚŽŽůůĞǀĞůďLJϳ͘,ŝƐŵĂƚŚĂŶĚƐĐŝĞŶĐĞƐŬŝůůƐǁĞƌĞĞdžĐĞƉƟŽŶĂů͘ƵƚŚĞǁĂƐƐŽĨĂƌĂŚĞĂĚŽĨŬŝĚƐŚŝƐ
ŽǁŶĂŐĞƚŚĂƚǁĞŚĂĚŵĂũŽƌƐŽĐŝĂůŝnjĂƟŽŶĐŽŶĐĞƌŶƐ͘DŽƚŚĞƌƐĐĂůůĞĚŵĞƚŽĐŽŵƉůĂŝŶƚŚĂƚůĞdžŚĂĚŵĂĚĞ
their
child
feel
dumb.
“Did
he
say
Tyler
was
stupid?”
I
asked
one
angry
mother,
ready
to
speak
to
Alex
immediately
if
he
was
being
mean.
dŚĞŵŽƚŚĞƌƐƚĂŵŵĞƌĞĚ͘͞tĞůů͘ĐƚƵĂůůLJ͕/͛ŵŶŽƚƐƵƌĞǁŚĂƚůĞdžƐĂŝĚďĞĐĂƵƐĞdLJůĞƌƐĂLJƐŚĞƵƐĞƐ
long
words
on
purpose
just
to
confuse
him.”
Then
there
was
the
mother
who
called
to
say
that
Alex
ǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚůĞƚŚĞƌƐŽŶǁŝŶĂƚDĂƌŝŽ<Ăƌƚ͘͞ĂĐŚĂƌLJǁĂƐǀĞƌLJƵƉƐĞƚĂŶĚƐĂLJƐƚŚĂƚůĞdžĐŚĞĂƚƐ͕͟ƐŚĞƐĂŝĚ͘/
didn’t
know
what
to
say.
Is
it
even
possible
to
cheat
at
video
games?
dŚĞƐƚŽƌLJǁĂƐĚŝīĞƌĞŶƚǁŝƚŚŐŝƌůƐ͘ůĞdžƐĂƚĂŶĚůŝƐƚĞŶĞĚǁŚĞŶƚŚĞLJƚĂůŬĞĚ͕ŽīĞƌŝŶŐƚŽŚĞůƉƚŚĞŵǁŝƚŚ
ƚŚĞŝƌƐĐŚŽŽůǁŽƌŬ͘tŚĞŶ/ĚƌŽǀĞĂƉƌĞƩLJϭϬͲLJĞĂƌŽůĚƚŽŵĂƌƟĂůĂƌƚƐǁŝƚŚůĞdž͕ŚĞƉƌĞƚĞŶĚĞĚŚĞŚĂĚ
ƚŽĨĂůůŝŶƚŽŚĞƌĂƐ/ƚƵƌŶĞĚĂĐŽƌŶĞƌ͕ƌĞƐƟŶŐŚŝƐŚĞĂĚŽŶŚĞƌƐŚŽƵůĚĞƌ͘dŚĞLJŐŝŐŐůĞĚĂŶĚǁŚŝƐƉĞƌĞĚ͘/
thought
of
her
now
as
the
specialist
planted
images
of
pregnancy
into
my
head.
The
doctor
knew
of
Alex’s
lack
of
social
skill
with
boys.
“ The
gap
between
himself
and
children
his
own
ĂŐĞǁŝůůĐŽŶƟŶƵĞƚŽǁŝĚĞŶďŽƚŚƉŚLJƐŝĐĂůůLJĂŶĚŝŶƚĞůůĞĐƚƵĂůůLJ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕ŚĂŶĚŝŶŐƵƐďƌŽĐŚƵƌĞƐĂďŽƵƚ
precocious
puberty.
The
front
picture
of
one
was
of
a
boy
standing
alone
in
a
school
hallway
leaning
ĂŐĂŝŶƐƚĂůŽĐŬĞƌ͘'ƌŽƵƉƐŽĨĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶŚƵĚĚůĞĚŝŶƚŚĞĚŝƐƚĂŶĐĞ͕ǁĂƌLJĂŶĚƚĂƵŶƟŶŐ͘͞/ĨůĞdž͛ƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJŝƐŶ͛ƚ
ƐƚŽƉƉĞĚďLJŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͕͟ŚĞĐŽŶƟŶƵĞĚ͕͞ŚĞǁŝůůŚĂǀĞƚŚĞƚĞƐƚŽƐƚĞƌŽŶĞŽĨĂŶĂĚƵůƚŵĂůĞũƵƐƚĂƐŚŝƐƉĞĞƌƐ
ĂƌĞďĞŐŝŶŶŝŶŐƉƵďĞƌƚLJ͘dŚĞĞŵďĂƌƌĂƐƐŵĞŶƚĂŶĚĨƌƵƐƚƌĂƟŽŶǁŝůůďĞŝŶƚĞŶƐĞ͘͟
9
/ƐƚƌƵŐŐůĞĚƚŽŐƌĂƐƉƚŚĞďĞŚĂǀŝŽƌĂůŝŵƉůŝĐĂƟŽŶƐŽĨƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐ
ƉƵďĞƌƚLJ͘/ŶƚĞƌŶĞƚƌĞƐĞĂƌĐŚŚĂĚĂŶƐǁĞƌĞĚŵĂŶLJŽĨŵLJƋƵĞƐƟŽŶƐ͕
but
I
couldn’t
fathom
why
doctors
were
so
concerned
about
Alex’s
ŵĞŶƚĂůŚĞĂůƚŚ͘tŚLJĐŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚǁĞũƵƐƚƐŝƚŚŝŵĚŽǁŶĂŶĚĞdžƉůĂŝŶƚŚĂƚ
he
was
too
young
to
have
sex?
And
why
did
they
assume
my
son
ǁĂƐŐŽŝŶŐƚŽůŽƐĞŚŝƐĐŽŵŵƵŶŝĐĂƟŽŶƐŬŝůůƐĂƐŚĞŐĂŝŶĞĚďŽĚLJŚĂŝƌ͍
ƚƚŚĂƚŵŽŵĞŶƚ͕ƚŚŽƵŐŚ͕ƚŚĞƋƵĞƐƟŽŶƚŚĂƚŵŽƐƚĐŽŶĐĞƌŶĞĚŵLJ
husband
and
I
was
whether
Alex
would
reach
his
full
adult
height.
sĂŐƵĞŝŵĂŐĞƐŽĨŵĂůĞĂŶĚĨĞŵĂůĞŐƌŽǁƚŚĐŚĂƌƚƐĨƌŽŵĂĐŽůůĞŐĞďŝŽůŽŐLJƚĞdžƚŇŝƩĞĚĂĐƌŽƐƐŵLJŝŶŶĞƌ
ĞLJĞ͘tŚĞŶƉƵďĞƌƚLJĞŶĚƐ͕ŐƌŽǁƚŚƐƚŽƉƐ͕ƚŽŽ͘ĂƌůLJŐƌŽǁƚŚƐƉƵƌƚƐŝŶĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶǁŝƚŚƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJ
ŵĂŬĞƚŚĞŵƚĂůůĞƌƚŚĂŶƚŚĞŝƌƉĞĞƌƐ͕ďƵƚƚŚĞLJƐƚŽƉŐƌŽǁŝŶŐƐŽŽŶĞƌĂŶĚŽŌĞŶĞŶĚƵƉĐŽŶƐŝĚĞƌĂďůLJ
shorter.
Sadly,
height
seemed
to
be
where
the
foretelling
powers
of
the
doctor
ended.
“I
can’t
an-‐
ƐǁĞƌƚŚĂƚ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕ŚĂŶĚŝŶŐƵƐƚŚĞĚŝĂŐŶŽƐŝƐƐŚĞĞƚ͘͞zŽƵƌƐŽŶǁŝůůƐƚŽƉŐĞƫŶŐƚĂůůĞƌǁŚĞŶŚŝƐďŽŶĞƐ
ĨƵƐĞ͕ǁŚŝĐŚĨŽƌŵŽƐƚŵĂůĞƐŝƐϭϴ͕ďƵƚĨŽƌůĞdžĐŽƵůĚďĞĂƐĞĂƌůLJĂƐϭϭ͘tĞ͛ůůŬŶŽǁŵŽƌĞŝŶƚŚƌĞĞ
months.”
The
doctor
reached
for
the
doorknob
but
then
turned
back
toward
us.
“More
than
concern
for
his
ŚĞŝŐŚƚ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕͞/͛ĚĐŽŶƐŝĚĞƌƉƌĞǀĞŶƟŶŐŚŝŵĨƌĞĞĂĐĐĞƐƐƚŽƚŚĞ/ŶƚĞƌŶĞƚ͘,ĂƌĚĐŽƌĞƉŽƌŶĐŽƵůĚďĞ
very
damaging
at
such
a
young
age,
and
boys
with
the
level
of
testosterone
your
ƐŽŶŚĂƐǁŝůůŽďƐĞƐƐ͘͟tĞƌĞǁĞƚĂůŬŝŶŐĂďŽƵƚůĞdž͛ƐďŽŶĞĂŐĞ͕ŽƌŚŝƐĐŚƌŽŶŽůŽŐŝĐĂů
ĂŐĞ͍/ƌĞĂůŝnjĞĚ/͛ĚŶĞǀĞƌŬŶŽǁĨŽƌƐƵƌĞĂŐĂŝŶ͘Ƶƚ͕ŝĨŚŝƐďŽŶĞĂŐĞǁĂƐƌĞĂůůLJƚŚĂƚŽĨ
ĂϭϰͲLJĞĂƌͲŽůĚ͕ǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚůŽŽŬŝŶŐĂƚƉŽƌŶŽŐƌĂƉŚLJďĞďĞƩĞƌƚŚĂŶĐŚĂƐŝŶŐŐŝƌůƐĂŶĚ
ĞŶŐĂŐŝŶŐƉĞŽƉůĞŝŶǀŝŽůĞŶƚĐŽŶĨƌŽŶƚĂƟŽŶƐ͕ďŽƚŚŽĨǁŚŝĐŚƚŚĞĚŽĐƚŽƌŚĂĚũƵƐƚĂůĞƌƚĞĚ
ƵƐĐŽƵůĚŚĂƉƉĞŶ͍tŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚǀŝƌƚƵĂůƐĞdžďĞƉƌĞĨĞƌĂďůĞƚŽĂĐƚƵĂůƐĞdž͍/ƐƚŚŝƐǁŚLJǁĞ
ŶĞĞĚĞĚĂƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚ͍dŽŚĞůƉƵƐĂŶƐǁĞƌƚŚĞƐĞƋƵĞƐƟŽŶƐ͍
It
started
with
pubic
hair
on
the
toilet
seat.
I’d
stared
at
the
small
hairs,
wondering
ǁŚLJƚŚĞƌĞǁĞƌĞƐŽŵĂŶLJ͘/ǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚŚĂǀĞƋƵĞƐƟŽŶĞĚƚŚĞŵŝĨƚŚĞƌĞŚĂĚŶ͛ƚĂůƐŽďĞĞŶ
so
much
urine
on
the
outside
of
the
toilet
bowl.
This
pubic
hair
belonged
to
some-‐
ŽŶĞǁŝƚŚůĂdžďĂƚŚƌŽŽŵŚĂďŝƚƐĂŶĚƉŽŽƌĂŝŵ͕ƚǁŽĐŚĂƌĂĐƚĞƌŝƐƟĐƐ/ŚĂĚůŽŶŐŝĚĞŶƟĮĞĚ
as
belonging
to
Alex.
dŚĞŶƚŚĞƌĞǁĂƐƚŚĞƌĂnjŽƌĞƉŝƐŽĚĞ͕ǁŚĞŶůĞdžĐƵƚŚŝƐůŝƉƚƌLJŝŶŐƚŽƐŚĂǀĞ͘/͛ĚŶŽƟĐĞĚĂ
darkening
of
hair
beneath
his
nose
and
on
his
cheeks,
but
I
come
from
a
very
hairy
family
and
hadn’t
thought
much
of
it.
Alex,
though,
was
deeply
concerned
and
tried
ƚŽƌĞŵŽǀĞƚŚĞƐƉĂƩĞƌŝŶŐŽĨĚĂƌŬŵŽƵƐƚĂĐŚĞŚĂŝƌǁŝƚŚŽƵƚŵLJŬŶŽǁůĞĚŐĞ͘/ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚ
understand
his
discomfort,
and
I
explained
to
him
that
the
hair
hadn’t
been
nearly
ĂƐŶŽƟĐĞĂďůĞĂƐƚŚĞďůŽŽĚLJǁŽƵŶĚ͘
I
called
our
primary
care
provider.
She
examined
Alex
and
recognized
the
signs
of
ĞĂƌůLJƉƵďĞƌƚLJ͕ďƵƚƐŚĞĂĚǀŝƐĞĚƚŚŽƌŽƵŐŚƚĞƐƟŶŐĂŶĚƐĞŶƚƵƐƚŽĂƉĞĚŝĂƚƌŝĐĞŶĚŽĐƌŝ-‐
nologist.
Precocious
puberty
is
considerably
less
common
in
boys
than
girls,
and
an
array
of
serious
congenital
anomalies,
tumors,
and
diseases
had
to
be
excluded
as
an
underlying
cause.
Eric
and
I
worried
about
all
that
could
be
wrong
with
Alex
and
blamed
our-‐
ƐĞůǀĞƐĨŽƌŶŽƚƌĞĐŽŐŶŝnjŝŶŐƚŚĞƐŝŐŶƐ͘ƵƚǁŚĂƚƉĂƌĞŶƚůŽŽŬƐĂƚŚĞƌϴͲLJĞĂƌŽůĚƐŽŶĂŶĚǁŽŶĚĞƌƐŝĨŚŝƐ
ƚĞƐƟĐůĞƐĂƌĞĂŶĂŐĞͲĂƉƉƌŽƉƌŝĂƚĞƐŝnjĞ͍ůĞdžǁĂƐǀĞƌLJŵŽĚĞƐƚ͕ĂŶĚ/͛ĚĂůǁĂLJƐƌĞƐƉĞĐƚĞĚŚŝƐƉƌŝǀĂĐLJ͘
tŚĞŶŚĞǁĂƐϳ͕ůĞdžŚĂĚŐŽŶĞƚŽƚŚĞĞŵĞƌŐĞŶĐLJƌŽŽŵĨŽƌĂƚǁŝƐƚĞĚĂƉƉĞŶĚŝdžƚĞƐƟƐ͘ƵƌŽůŽŐŝƐƚŚĂĚ
ĞdžĂŵŝŶĞĚŚŝŵŵƵůƟƉůĞƟŵĞƐǁŚŝůĞŵŽŶŝƚŽƌŝŶŐƚŚĞƚĞƐƟĐůĞ͛ƐďůŽŽĚLJƐƵƉƉůLJ͘tŚLJŚĂĚŶ͛ƚŚĞŶŽƟĐĞĚ͍
/ƚǁĂƐŶ͛ƚƵŶƟůƚŚĞĞŶĚŽĐƌŝŶŽůŽŐŝƐƚƚŽŽŬƚŚĞ͞ǁŽŽĚĞŶďĂůůƐŽŶĂƐƚƌŝŶŐ͟ŽƵƚŽĨŚŝƐǁŚŝƚĞĐŽĂƚƉŽĐŬĞƚ
ƚŽŵĞĂƐƵƌĞƚĞƐƟĐƵůĂƌƐŝnjĞƚŚĂƚůĞdž͛ƐďŝŽůŽŐŝĐĂůĂŐĞǁĂƐƌĞǀĞĂůĞĚ͘DLJƐŽŶ͛ƐƚĞƐƟĐůĞƐǁĞƌĞƚŚĞƐŝnjĞŽĨ
ĂϭϰͲLJĞĂƌͲŽůĚ͛ƐĂŶĚǁŽƵůĚŐƌŽǁƚŽƚŚĞƐŝnjĞŽĨĂŵĂŶ͛ƐŝŶĨĞǁĞƌƚŚĂŶƚǁĞŶƚLJͲĨŽƵƌŵŽŶƚŚƐŝĨǁĞĚŝĚŶ͛ƚ
ĚŽƐŽŵĞƚŚŝŶŐƚŽƐƚŽƉŝƚ͘dŚĂƚƐŽŵĞƚŚŝŶŐǁĂƐĂŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͕>ƵƉƌŽŶ͕ǁŚŝĐŚŶĞĞĚĞĚƚŽďĞŝŶũĞĐƚĞĚ
ŚĞĂƌĚĂƚŚŝŶŐĂŌĞƌ
shrinkage
and
genitals.
/ĨĞůƚƐŽƌƌLJĨŽƌůĞdž͘,ĞůŽŽŬĞĚďĞǁŝůĚĞƌĞĚĂŶĚǀƵůŶĞƌĂďůĞ͕ƐŝƫŶŐŽŶƚŚĞĞdžĂŵƚĂďůĞŝŶĂŚŽƐƉŝƚĂů
ũŽŶŶŝĞ͘,ĞĚŝĚŶ͛ƚůŽŽŬĐĂƉĂďůĞŽĨŐĞƫŶŐĂŐŝƌůƉƌĞŐŶĂŶƚŽƌƐƉĞŶĚŝŶŐŚŽƵƌƐŐĂnjŝŶŐĂƚŚĂƌĚĐŽƌĞ
pornography.
I
wanted
to
protect
him,
and
I
couldn’t
help
wondering
if
this
was
somehow
all
ŵLJĨĂƵůƚ͘tĂƐŝƚƚŚĞDĐŽŶĂůĚ͛ƐĐŚŝĐŬĞŶŶƵŐŐĞƚƐ/͛ĚĂůůŽǁĞĚŚŝŵƚŽĞĂƚ͍ĞĞƉĨƌŝĞĚĐŚƵŶŬƐŽĨ
ĐŚĞŵŝĐĂůƐŵŝdžĞĚǁŝƚŚŚŽƌŵŽŶĂůůLJŝŶũĞĐƚĞĚĨŽǁů͍tĂƐŝƚƚŚĞŚŽƌŵŽŶĞƐŝŶƚŚĞŵŝůŬ͍dŚĞĐŚĞĞƐĞ͍
dŚĞĚŽĐƚŽƌĂƐƐƵƌĞĚŵĞƚŚĂƚŝƚǁĂƐŵŽƐƚůŝŬĞůLJŐĞŶĞƟĐ͕ĂŶĚƉŚŽŶĞĐĂůůƐƚŽĨĂŵŝůLJŵĞŵďĞƌƐƐŽŽŶ
ƌĞǀĞĂůĞĚƚŚĂƚŵLJĨĂƚŚĞƌŚĂĚĞdžƉĞƌŝĞŶĐĞĚƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJďĂĐŬŝŶƚŚĞϭϵϰϬƐ͘EŽŽŶĞǁŽƵůĚ
have
thought
to
diagnose
it
back
then,
but
my
father
remembered.
He’d
had
a
mustache
at
9,
ďĞĂƌĚŐƌŽǁƚŚĂƚϭϬ͘/ĐĂƌƌŝĞĚĂƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJŐĞŶĞ͘
ƌŝĐĂŶĚ/ĂŐƌĞĞĚƚŽŝŶǀŽůǀĞůĞdžŝŶĚĞĐŝƐŝŽŶƐĂďŽƵƚŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͘dŚŝƐǁĂƐůĞdž͛ƐůŝĨĞ͕ĂŌĞƌĂůů͕ĂŶĚ
/ǁĂƐŶ͛ƚŐŽŝŶŐƚŽĨŽƌĐĞŚŝŵƚŽƐƵďŵŝƚƚŽĚĂŝůLJŝŶũĞĐƟŽŶƐ͘/ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚŶĞĞĚƚŽďĞĂŶŽƌĂĐůĞƚŽĨŽƌĞƐĞĞ
the
nightmare
ahead
of
me.
I
remembered
all
too
clearly
having
to
administer
eardrops
for
an
ŝŶĨĞĐƟŽŶ͕ŚŝŵƐĐƌĞĂŵŝŶŐĂŶĚŬŝĐŬŝŶŐŽŶƚŚĞŬŝƚĐŚĞŶŇŽŽƌ͘ĞƐŝĚĞƐ͕ŚŽǁĐŽƵůĚĂŶLJŽŶĞŬŶŽǁƚŚĞ
ůŽŶŐͲƚĞƌŵĞīĞĐƚƐŽĨĂŶLJŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶǁŝƚŚĂƐƵƌĞƚLJƚŚĂƚŵĂĚĞŝƚĂďƐŽůƵƚĞůLJƐĂĨĞ͍
ůĞdžĚŝĚŶ͛ƚƉŽŶĚĞƌŽƌŚĞƐŝƚĂƚĞ͕͞EŽŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͘ƌŝĐ͛ƐĚĂĚĂŶĚƐĞǀĞƌĂůŽƚŚĞƌĨĂŵŝůLJ
members
disagreed.
“It’ll
be
easier
on
Alex
if
you
give
him
Lupron,”
my
sister
said.
Eric’s
father
warned,
“Height
for
a
man
is
like
beauty
for
a
woman.
It
opens
doors.”
At
our
next
visit
to
the
doctor,
we
told
him
of
our
decision
and
were
comforted
when
he
volunteered
that
his
own
son
ǁĂƐŐŽŝŶŐƚŚƌŽƵŐŚƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJͶĂŶĚƚŚĂƚƚŚĞLJ͛ĚĂůƐŽŽƉƚĞĚƚŽĨŽƌĞŐŽŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͘
ĨĞǁǁĞĞŬƐůĂƚĞƌ͕/ŶĞĞĚĞĚĂďĂďLJƐŝƩĞƌĂŶĚŚŝƌĞĚĂLJŽƵŶŐƚĞĞŶĂŐĞŐŝƌůĨƌŽŵƚŚĞŶĞŝŐŚďŽƌŚŽŽĚ͘
tŚĞŶƌŝĐĂŶĚ/ĐĂŵĞŚŽŵĞ͕ǁĞǁĞƌĞŐƌĞĞƚĞĚďLJƌĞĚĨĂĐĞƐĂŶĚŐŝŐŐůŝŶŐ͘dŚĞŶĞdžƚŵŽƌŶŝŶŐ͕ƚŚĞ
Őŝƌů͛ƐŵŽƚŚĞƌĐĂůůĞĚĂŶĚƐĂŝĚŚĞƌĚĂƵŐŚƚĞƌǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚďĞďĂďLJƐŝƫŶŐĂŐĂŝŶ͘^ŚĞƌĞĨƵƐĞĚƚŽƚĞůůŵĞ
why.
͞tŚĂƚŚĂƉƉĞŶĞĚ͍͟/ĂƐŬĞĚůĞdž͘
“Nothing,”
he
said,
barely
looking
up
from
his
computer
keyboard.
He
didn’t
stop
typing.
“I
don’t
ŬŶŽǁǁŚĂƚŚĞƌŵŽƚŚĞƌ͛ƐƚĂůŬŝŶŐĂďŽƵƚ͘tĞƉůĂLJĞĚǀŝĚĞŽŐĂŵĞƐ͘͟
“Something
had
to
have
happened.”
“Nope.
Nothing.”
ƌŝĐĂŶĚ/ƐƚŽƉƉĞĚŚŝƌŝŶŐďĂďLJƐŝƩĞƌƐ͘
ůĞdžďƵŝůƚŚŝƐŽǁŶĚĞƐŬƚŽƉĐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌ͘dŚĞƌĞǁĂƐŶŽůŝŵŝƟŶŐŚŝƐĂĐĐĞƐƐƚŽƚŚĞ/ŶƚĞƌŶĞƚĞǀĞŶ
if
we’d
wanted
to—which
we
didn’t.
Eric
and
I
agreed
that
Internet
pornography
would
al-‐
ůŽǁůĞdžĂƐĞdžƵĂůŽƵƚůĞƚƚŚĂƚǁĂƐƚŚĞƐĂĨĞƐƚŽĨĂůůƚŚĞĂůƚĞƌŶĂƟǀĞƐ͘tĞĚŝĚŶ͛ƚƚĞůůůĞdžŽĨŽƵƌ
decision,
but
we
chose
not
to
control
the
pornography
unless
he
used
it
inappropriately—
ƐŚĂƌŝŶŐŝƚǁŝƚŚĨƌŝĞŶĚƐ͕ŽƌƌĞǀĞĂůŝŶŐŚŝƐƉŚLJƐŝĐĂůůŽĐĂƟŽŶƚŽƐƚƌĂŶŐĞƌƐ͘>ŽŽŬŝŶŐďĂĐŬ͕/ƌĞĂůŝnjĞ/
knew
nothing
about
boys
and
pornography.
I’d
never
seen
online
porn
and
assumed
that
Alex
was
ǀŝĞǁŝŶŐƐƟůůƉŝĐƚƵƌĞƐƐŝŵŝůĂƌƚŽƉƌŝŶƚŵĂŐĂnjŝŶĞƐ͘/ƚǁĂƐŶ͛ƚƵŶƟůůĞdžǁĂƐϭϮƚŚĂƚǁĞůĞĂƌŶĞĚƚŚĂƚ
ŚĞ͛ĚďĞĞŶĚŽǁŶůŽĂĚŝŶŐǀŝĚĞŽĐůŝƉƐĂŶĚǀŝƐŝƟŶŐĂĚƵůƚĐŚĂƚƌŽŽŵƐ͘KƵƌƚĞĐŚŶŽůŽŐŝĐĂůƉƌŽĮĐŝĞŶĐLJ
was
no
match
for
Alex’s.
There
were
rapid
clicks
of
the
mouse
when
either
his
dad
or
I
entered
his
ǀŝĐŝŶŝƚLJ͕ĂŶĚŚĞŽŌĞŶďůŽĐŬĞĚƚŚĞƐĐƌĞĞŶǁŝƚŚŚŝƐďŽĚLJ͘,ĞůŝǀĞĚŝŶƚŚĞŐůŽŽŵŽĨƚŚĞďĂƐĞŵĞŶƚůŝŬĞ
ĂŵŽĚĞƌŶ'ŽůůƵŵ͕ƉƌŽƚĞĐƟŶŐƚŚĞƉƌŝǀĂĐLJŚĞĐŽŶƐŝĚĞƌĞĚƉƌĞĐŝŽƵƐ͘Ƶƚ/ǁŽƌƌŝĞĚƚŚĂƚůĞdžǁŽƵůĚ
ƚŚŝŶŬĂůůǁŽŵĞŶǁĞƌĞƐŝŵŝůĂƌƚŽƚŚĞƚŚŝŶĂŶĚĞĂŐĞƌƉŽƌŶƐƚĂƌƐŚĞŐŽŽŐůĞĚ͕ĂŶĚ/ŝŶŝƟĂƚĞĚŚƵŶĚƌĞĚƐ
ŽĨĐŽŶǀĞƌƐĂƟŽŶƐǁŝƚŚŚŝŵĂďŽƵƚǁŽŵĞŶĂŶĚĂĐĐĞƉƚĂďůĞďĞŚĂǀŝŽƌŝŶƌĞůĂƟŽŶƐŚŝƉƐ͘
I
bought
It’s
Perfectly
Normal
by
Robie
Harris,
where
the
women
and
the
men
are
overweight
car-‐
ƚŽŽŶĮŐƵƌĞƐ͘dŚŝƐ͕/ƚŽůĚůĞdž͕ŝƐǁŚĂƚŵŽƐƚǁŽŵĞŶůŽŽŬůŝŬĞ͘,ĞŐůĂŶĐĞĚĂƚƚŚĞƉŝĐƚƵƌĞƐ͘͞/ĚŽŶ͛ƚ
think
that’s
accurate,”
he
said.
Then
he
dropped
the
book
on
the
kitchen
table
and
descended
ƚŽƚŚĞďĂƐĞŵĞŶƚ͘>ĂƚĞƌ/ŶŽƟĐĞĚƚŚĞŬǁĂƐŐŽŶĞ͘tŚĞŶ/ĂƐŬĞĚŚŝŵĂďŽƵƚŝƚ͕ŚĞǁĂƐƐŝƫŶŐŝŶ
front
of
his
computer
with
headphones
on.
He
removed
only
one
cup
from
his
ear
when
he
saw
ŵĞĂŶĚƌŽůůĞĚŚŝƐĞLJĞƐĂƚƚŚĞƋƵĞƐƟŽŶ͘͞EŽŶĞŽĨLJŽƵƌďƵƐŝŶĞƐƐ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕ĨŽƵƌǁŽƌĚƐƚŚĂƚǁĞƌĞů-‐
Ğdž͛ƐŶĞǁƐŝŐŶĂƚƵƌĞĞŶĚŝŶŐƚŽĂůůĐŽŶǀĞƌƐĂƟŽŶƐĚĞĞŵĞĚƵŶĐŽŵĨŽƌƚĂďůĞ͘/ĐŽƵůĚŚĞĂƌĂƟŶŶLJĚŝƐƚĂŶƚ
WĞƚĞ^ĞĞŐĞƌƐŝŶŐŝŶŐĂďŽƵƚĂůůƚŚĞůŝƩůĞďŽdžĞƐŵĂĚĞŽƵƚŽĨƟĐŬLJƚĂĐŬLJƚŚĂƚůŽŽŬĞĚũƵƐƚƚŚĞƐĂŵĞ͘
ůĞdžďƵŝůƚĂŐĂŵŝŶŐĐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌĂŶĚďĞŐĂŶǁƌŝƟŶŐŚŝƐŽǁŶƉƌŽŐƌĂŵƐ͘,ĞůĞĂƌŶĞĚ,dD>ĂŶĚ:ĂǀĂ
and
was
obsessed
with
source
codes
and
algorithms.
He
became
a
specialist
in
behind-‐the-‐scenes
ŵĞĐŚĂŶŝnjĂƟŽŶĂŶĚĞdžĞĐƵƚĞĚƚŚĞŵĂũŽƌƉĂƌƚŽĨŚŝƐǁŽƌŬǁŚĞŶĞǀĞƌLJŽŶĞǁĂƐĂƐůĞĞƉ͘,ĞŶĞǀĞƌ
ǁĞŶƚƚŽďĞĚďĞĨŽƌĞϰ͗ϬϬĂ͘ŵ͕͘ĂŶĚŚŝƐŵŽŽĚĚƵƌŝŶŐƚŚĞĚĂLJ͕ĞƐƉĞĐŝĂůůLJŝĨŚŝƐĨĂƚŚĞƌǁĂƐŚŽŵĞ͕ǁĂƐ
ƐƵƌůLJ͘tŚĞŶĞǀĞƌ/ůŽƐƚƉĂƟĞŶĐĞǁŝƚŚůĞdž͛ƐŝůůͲƚĞŵƉĞƌ͕ŚĞĂĐĐƵƐĞĚŵĞŽĨWD^͕ĂŶĞŶƌĂŐŝŶŐĂĐĐƵƐĂ-‐
ƟŽŶƚŚĂƚŵĂĚĞŵĞǁŽƌƌLJŝĨ/͛ĚŵĂĚĞƚŚĞƌŝŐŚƚĚĞĐŝƐŝŽŶĂďŽƵƚŵĞĚŝĐĂƟŽŶ͘,ŽƌŵŽŶĂůůLJĂŶĚŝŶƚĞů-‐
lectually,
Alex
accelerated
into
maturity.
The
gap
was
so
wide
between
him
and
homeschooled
ĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶŚŝƐĂŐĞƚŚĂƚĂƚϭϭ͕ŚĞŐĂǀĞƵƉƉƌĞƚĞŶĚŝŶŐŚĞĐŽƵůĚƐŝƚŝŶƚŚĞƉƌŝǀĂƚĞůLJƚĂƵŐŚƚƐĐŝĞŶĐĞ
classes
with
other
boys
and
begged
me
to
enroll
him
at
the
University
of
Southern
Maine.
Too
young
for
the
university’s
Early
Studies
program,
I
got
permission
for
Alex
to
take
classes
in
the
ĐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌƐĐŝĞŶĐĞĚĞƉĂƌƚŵĞŶƚĂƐĂƉĂƌƚͲƟŵĞƐƚƵĚĞŶƚ͘ƌŝĐǁĞŶƚǁŝƚŚŚŝŵĨŽƌƚŚĞĮƌƐƚĨĞǁĚĂLJƐŽĨ
the
semester,
but
it
was
obvious
Alex
didn’t
want
him
there.
Now
shaving
daily,
Alex
seemed
to
want
his
professors
and
new
teenage
friends
to
think
he
was
a
grownup
orphan.
tĞƌĞƚƵƌŶĞĚƚŽƚŚĞƉĞĚŝĂƚƌŝĐĞŶĚŽĐƌŝŶŽůŽŐŝƐƚĞǀĞƌLJƚŚƌĞĞŵŽŶƚŚƐ͘dŚĞǁƌŝƐƚyͲƌĂLJƐƐŚŽǁĞĚƚŚĂƚ
ůĞdž͕ĂƚƚŚĞĐŚƌŽŶŽůŽŐŝĐĂůĂŐĞŽĨϭϭ͕ǁĂƐƚŚĞďŝŽůŽŐŝĐĂůĂŐĞŽĨϭϳ͘,ŝƐďŽŶĞƐŚĂĚĨƵƐĞĚ͘,ĞǁĂƐ
ϱͲĨŽŽƚͲϳ͕ŽŶĞŝŶĐŚƚĂůůĞƌƚŚĂŶŚŝƐĚŽĐƚŽƌ͘ƵƚƚŚĞũŽƵƌŶĞLJǁĂƐŽŶůLJŚĂůĨŽǀĞƌ͕ĂŶĚƚŚĞƌĞĂůďĂƩůĞĨŽƌ
Alex
was
just
beginning.
ůĞdžǁĂŶƚĞĚĂŐŝƌůĨƌŝĞŶĚ͕ďƵƚŚĞǁĂƐŶ͛ƚŝŶƚĞƌĞƐƚĞĚŝŶĂŶLJŚŝƐĂŐĞ͘zŽƵŶŐŐŝƌůƐůŽŽŬĞĚůŝŬĞĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶƚŽ
Śŝŵ͘,ĞůƵƐƚĞĚĂŌĞƌƚŚĞĨĞǁĨĞŵĂůĞƐŝŶƚŚĞĐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌƐĐŝĞŶĐĞĚĞƉĂƌƚŵĞŶƚ͘tŚĞŶŽƚŚĞƌƉĂƌĞŶƚƐƚŽůĚ
ŵĞŚŽǁƚŚĞLJ͛ĚĨŽƌĐĞƚŚĞŝƌϭϯͲLJĞĂƌͲŽůĚƐŽīƚŚĞ/ŶƚĞƌŶĞƚĂƚϵƉ͘ŵ͘ĂŶĚƐĞŶĚƚŚĞŵƚŽďĞĚ͕/ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚƐĂLJ
ĂŶLJƚŚŝŶŐ͘dŚĞLJǁŽƵůĚŚĂǀĞďĞĞŶƐŚŽĐŬĞĚƚŽŬŶŽǁƚŚĂƚ/ĂůůŽǁĞĚŵLJƐŽŶĨƌĞĞĂĐĐĞƐƐƚŽƉŽƌŶ͘tĞ
ƐŚŽǁĞĚŽŶůLJĂƐŵĂůůƉŽƌƟŽŶŽĨŽƵƌŚŽŵĞƚŽĨƌŝĞŶĚƐ͘/ǁŽƌƌŝĞĚĂďŽƵƚĂůůƚŚĞƐĞĐƌĞƚƐ͘
“Do
you
want
a
therapist?”
I
asked
Alex.
“Do
you
need
a
therapist?”
͞EŽ͕͟ŚĞ͛ĚƐŶĂƌů͘͞/͛ŵũƵƐƚĮŶĞ͘͟
WŽƌŶŽŐƌĂƉŚLJĂŶĚƉƌŽŐƌĂŵŵŝŶŐůĂŶŐƵĂŐĞƐŽĐĐƵƉŝĞĚĂůůŽĨŚŝƐŶŝŐŚƚƐ͘tĞŬŶĞǁƚŚŝƐǁŝƚŚŽƵƚůĞdž
having
to
tell
us.
He
missed
classes
because
he
couldn’t
make
himself
get
up.
If
he
managed
to
go
ƚŚƌŽƵŐŚƚŚĞŵŽƟŽŶƐ͕ŚĞǁĂƐĞdžƉůŽƐŝǀĞĂŶĚŽďŶŽdžŝŽƵƐ͘/ǁŽƌƌŝĞĚƚŚĂƚŚŝƐƐŝƐƚĞƌƚŽĚĚůŝŶŐĂƌŽƵŶĚƚŚĞ
ŚŽƵƐĞŵŝŐŚƚďĞĂīĞĐƚĞĚďLJŚŝƐĂŶŐĞƌ͘/ǁŽƌƌŝĞĚƚŚĂƚƐŚĞŵŝŐŚƚŐŽƚŚƌŽƵŐŚƉƵďĞƌƚLJƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐůLJ͕
too.
tĞǁĞƌĞǁƌŽŶŐ͘ůĞdž͛ƐĚƌŝǀĞƚŽĞŶŐĂŐĞŝŶƐĞdžƵĂůĂĐƚƐŐĂǀĞŚŝŵĂƐƚĂŐŐĞƌŝŶŐƚŽůĞƌĂŶĐĞĨŽƌĂǁŽŵĂŶǁŚŽ
ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚƐŚĂƌĞĂŶLJŽĨŚŝƐŐŽĂůƐŽƌĐŽŵŵƵŶŝĐĂƚĞǁŝƚŚŚŝŵďĞLJŽŶĚŵƵŶĚĂŶĞĐŽŶǀĞƌƐĂƟŽŶ͘KƵƌƐƚƌĂƚĞŐLJǁĂƐ
ƚŽŚĂǀĞƚŚĞƚǁŽǁŚĞƌĞǁĞĐŽƵůĚƐĞĞƚŚĞŵ͘dŽĂǀŽŝĚůĞdžƌƵŶŶŝŶŐŽīƚŽWŽƌƚůĂŶĚĂŶĚŚĂǀŝŶŐƐĞdžǁŚŝůĞǁĞ
ƐůĞƉƚ͕ƌŝĐĂŶĚ/ĂůůŽǁĞĚƚŚĞLJŽƵŶŐǁŽŵĂŶƚŽƐƚĂLJĂƚŽƵƌŚŽƵƐĞ͕ĮƌŵůLJŝŶǀŽŬŝŶŐĂŶŽƐŵŽŬŝŶŐƌƵůĞ͘DƵů-‐
ƟƚƵĚŝŶŽƵƐƌŽůůƐĞƐĐĂƉĞĚŚĞƌĨĂĚĞĚƐĐŽŽƉĞĚͲŶĞĐŬƚŽƉƐ͕ĂŶĚ/ƚŽŽŬŚĞƌƐŚŽƉƉŝŶŐĂŶĚďŽƵŐŚƚŚĞƌƐĞǀĞƌĂů
ŽƵƞŝƚƐ͕ĂďƌĂ͕ĂŶĚƐŚŽĞƐƚŚĂƚƐŚĞǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚŚĂǀĞƚŽďĞŶĚƚŽƟĞ͘dŚĞŶ/ĞŶĐŽƵƌĂŐĞĚŚĞƌƚŽĂƉƉůLJĨŽƌũŽďƐ
ĂŶĚĐŚĂƵīĞƵƌĞĚŚĞƌƚŽŐƌŽĐĞƌLJĂŶĚĐůŽƚŚŝŶŐƐƚŽƌĞƐƚŽĮůůŽƵƚĂƉƉůŝĐĂƟŽŶƐ͘/ŵĞƚǁŝƚŚŚĞƌŵŽƚŚĞƌ͕ǁŚŽ
lived
in
a
low-‐income
housing
complex
and
survived
on
food
stamps
and
government
supplements.
She
begrudgingly
agreed
to
let
her
daughter
move
back
home.
Driven
by
testosterone
and
sexual
fantasy,
Alex
wanted
to
spend
every
second
he
could
with
his
girl-‐
ĨƌŝĞŶĚ͘ƌŝĐĂŶĚ/ĂƌŐƵĞĚǁŝƚŚůĞdžĐŽŶƐƚĂŶƚůLJĂďŽƵƚƚŚĞƌĞůĂƟŽŶƐŚŝƉ͕ƵƐƵĂůůLJĞŶĚŝŶŐǁŝƚŚŚŝŵƐůĂŵŵŝŶŐ
ĂŶĚůŽĐŬŝŶŐŚŝƐďĞĚƌŽŽŵĚŽŽƌ͘dǁŽŵŽŶƚŚƐŝŶƚŽƚŚĞƌĞůĂƟŽŶƐŚŝƉ͕ƐŚĞŐĂǀĞŚŝŵŚĞĂĚůŝĐĞ͘ůĞdžƌĞĨƵƐĞĚƚŽ
ĐƵƚŚŝƐƌůŽ'ƵƚŚƌŝĞŚĂŝƌĂŶĚǁĂƐĐĂƌĞůĞƐƐǁŝƚŚƚŚĞƚƌĞĂƚŵĞŶƚ͘tŚĞŶ/ƚŽůĚŚŝŵƚŚĂƚŚŝƐŐŝƌůĨƌŝĞŶĚĐŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚ
ĐŽŵĞƚŽŽƵƌŚŽƵƐĞƵŶƟůŚĞƌůŝĐĞǁĂƐŐŽŶĞ͕ŚĞƉŽƵŶĚĞĚŚŝƐĮƐƚƐĂŐĂŝŶƐƚƚŚĞǁĂůů͕ĐƌĂĐŬŝŶŐƚŚĞǁŽŽĚŽĨŵLJ
ďĞĚƌŽŽŵĚŽŽƌ͘dŚĞŶŚĞůĞŌŽŶĨŽŽƚĂŶĚŚĞĂĚĞĚŝŶƚŽWŽƌƚůĂŶĚ͕ƌĞƚƵƌŶŝŶŐǁŝƚŚƐƚŽƌŝĞƐŽĨĞdžƉůŽŝƚƐƚŚĂƚǁĞƌĞ
ƚŽŽŽƵƚƌĂŐĞŽƵƐĨŽƌƵƐƚŽďĞůŝĞǀĞ͘tĞŬŶĞǁŚĞ͛ĚƐƉĞŶƚƚŚĞĚĂLJŚĂǀŝŶŐƐĞdž͘
KǀĞƌƚŚĞŶĞdžƚĨĞǁŵŽŶƚŚƐ͕ĞĂĐŚƟŵĞǁĞƚƌŝĞĚƚŽĞdžƉůĂŝŶƚŽůĞdžƚŚĂƚŚĞŵŝŐŚƚŚĂǀĞĐŚŽƐĞŶŚŝƐĮƌƐƚŐŝƌů-‐
ĨƌŝĞŶĚƉŽŽƌůLJ͕ŚĞĐĂůůĞĚƵƐĞůŝƟƐƚĂŶĚƚŚƌĞĂƚĞŶĞĚƵƐǁŝƚŚƚŚĞůŽƐƐŽĨŚŝƐĮůŝĂůůŽǀĞ͘tŚĞŶŚĞƌĞĂůŝnjĞĚƚŚĂƚ
ŚŝƐŝŶƐƵůƚƐŶŽůŽŶŐĞƌŚĂĚƚŚĞĚĞƐŝƌĞĚĞīĞĐƚ͕ŚĞďĞĐĂŵĞƉŚLJƐŝĐĂů͕ƐŚŽǀŝŶŐŵĞĂŐĂŝŶƐƚƚŚĞǁĂůů͕ŚŝƐĨĂĐĞ
ŝŶĐŚĞƐĨƌŽŵŵŝŶĞ͘͞zŽƵ͛ƌĞƚŚĞǁŽƌƐƚŵŽƚŚĞƌĞǀĞƌ͊͟ŚĞŚŝƐƐĞĚƚŚƌŽƵŐŚĐůĞŶĐŚĞĚƚĞĞƚŚ͕ůĞĂŶŝŶŐŚŝƐǁĞŝŐŚƚ
into
me.
“I
can
marry
whoever
I
want.
I
don’t
need
your
permission.”
He
pushed
harder,
desperate
to
ŝŶƟŵŝĚĂƚĞŵĞ͘,ĞŶŽůŽŶŐĞƌůŽŽŬĞĚĐƵƚĞĂŶĚĐƵĚĚůLJ͘͞ŶLJũƵĚŐĞǁŽƵůĚĞŵĂŶĐŝƉĂƚĞŵĞ͘͟
ůƚŚŽƵŐŚ/ŬŶĞǁŚŝƐďŝŽůŽŐŝĐĂůĂŐĞǁĂƐϭϴ͕ŚŝƐƐƚƌĞŶŐƚŚƐƵƌƉƌŝƐĞĚŵĞ͘/ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚĨĂůƚĞƌďƵƚLJĞůůĞĚƌŝŐŚƚďĂĐŬ
in
his
face,
remembering
the
advice
of
a
dog
trainer.
“Right
now
you’re
the
worst
son
ever,
and
if
you
ǁĂŶƚƚŽůĞĂǀĞ͕ůĞĂǀĞ͕͟/ƚŽůĚŚŝŵ͘,ŝƐĨĂĐĞƚǁŝƐƚĞĚǁŝƚŚĞŵŽƟŽŶ͘͞/ĐĂŶ͛ƚďĞĂƌŽƵŶĚLJŽƵĂŶLJŵŽƌĞ͕͟ŚĞ
ƐŚŽƵƚĞĚĂƐŚĞƐƚŽŵƉĞĚĂǁĂLJ͘͞/ũƵƐƚŚĂƚĞLJŽƵƐŽŵƵĐŚ͊͟
^ĞǀĞƌĂůĚĂLJƐůĂƚĞƌ͕ůĞdžƌƵƐŚĞĚĂƚŚŝƐĚĂĚƐŚŽƵůĚĞƌĮƌƐƚ͘/ǁĂƐŶ͛ƚŝŶƚŚĞŬŝƚĐŚĞŶǁŚĞƌĞŝƚŚĂƉƉĞŶĞĚ͕ďƵƚ
ƚŚĞŶŽŝƐĞƌĞǀĞƌďĞƌĂƚĞĚƚŚƌŽƵŐŚƚŚĞŚŽƵƐĞ͛ƐĐŽƌĞƵƉƚŚĞƐƚĂŝƌƐƚŽǁŚĞƌĞ/ǁĂƐǁĂƚĐŚŝŶŐdŚĞ>ŝƩůĞDĞƌ-‐
ŵĂŝĚǁŝƚŚůĞdž͛ƐƐŝƐƚĞƌ͘/ŚĞĂƌĚ͕͞dŚŝƐďĞŚĂǀŝŽƌŝƐƵŶĂĐĐĞƉƚĂďůĞ͘zŽƵǁŝůůŶŽƚƚƌĞĂƚƵƐƚŚŝƐǁĂLJ͘͟dŚĞƐĐƵŋĞ
ended
with
Alex
running
out
of
the
house
in
tears
and
Eric
driving
himself
to
the
emergency
room
with
a
ďƌŽŬĞŶƌŝď͘EĞǀĞƌƵŶĚĞƌĞƐƟŵĂƚĞƚŚĞƉŽǁĞƌŽĨƚĞƐƚŽƐƚĞƌŽŶĞ͘dŚĞƌĞĐŽƵůĚďĞƐĞƌŝŽƵƐĐŽŶƐĞƋƵĞŶĐĞƐ͘
^ƵĚĚĞŶůLJ͕ƚŚĞƌĂƉLJĚŝĚŶ͛ƚƐĞĞŵůŝŬĞĂŶŽƉƟŽŶďƵƚĂŶĞĐĞƐƐŝƚLJ͘dŚĞƌĞǁĂƐŶŽĚŽƵďƚͶǁĞǁĞǁĞƌĞŝŶĂďŝŐ
ĐŽŵƉůŝĐĂƚĞĚĞŵďĂƌƌĂƐƐŝŶŐŵĞƐƐƚŚĂƚĐŽƵůĚĂīĞĐƚůĞdž͛ƐǁŚŽůĞůŝĨĞ͘ŶĚŽƵƌƐ͘/ŚŽƉĞĚǁĞǁĞƌĞŶ͛ƚŐŽŝŶŐƚŽ
I
began
calling
therapists,
but
most
were
reluctant
to
work
with
Alex.
They
didn’t
know
enough
about
ƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJŽƌŝƚƐĨĂŵŝůLJĚLJŶĂŵŝĐƐ͘ŌĞƌƐĞǀĞƌĂůǁĞĞŬƐ͕/ůŽĐĂƚĞĚĂŵĂŶǁŚŽƌĞůƵĐƚĂŶƚůLJĂŐƌĞĞĚƚŽ
meet
with
us.
I
made
it
clear
that
the
therapy
was
for
Alex,
that
I
wanted
a
safe
place
for
him
to
discuss
ŚŝƐŝƐƐƵĞƐ͘/ǁĂŶƚĞĚƚŽďĞŝŶĐůƵĚĞĚĂƐůŝƩůĞĂƐƉŽƐƐŝďůĞ͕ďƵƚŚĞŝŶƐŝƐƚĞĚƚŚĂƚǁĞĂůůĐŽŵĞƚŽƚŚĞĮƌƐƚƐĞƐ-‐
sion.
ŌĞƌůŝƐƚĞŶŝŶŐƚŽƵƐƚĂůŬĨŽƌƚŚŝƌƚLJŵŝŶƵƚĞƐĂŶĚĞdžƉƌĞƐƐŝŶŐĚŝƐĂƉƉƌŽǀĂůƚŚĂƚǁĞ͛ĚĂůůŽǁĞĚůĞdžƵŶƐƵƉĞƌ-‐
ǀŝƐĞĚ/ŶƚĞƌŶĞƚƐƵƌĮŶŐ͕ƚŚĞƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚƉŽƐŝƟŽŶĞĚŚŝŵƐĞůĨƚŽůŽŽŬĚŝƌĞĐƚůLJĂƚůĞdž͕ǁŚŽƐĂƚĂƚƚŚĞĞŶĚŽĨ
the
couch—as
far
away
from
us
as
possible.
“Are
you
afraid
of
your
father?”
he
asked
our
son,
his
hands
clasped
over
his
rotund
stomach
like
a
suspension
bridge.
“Do
you
feel
that
you
need
to
defend
yourself
because
your
life
is
in
danger?”
ůĞdžƐĂǁĂǁĂLJƚŽƌĞŵŽǀĞŚŝŵƐĞůĨĨƌŽŵĂůůƌĞƐƉŽŶƐŝďŝůŝƚLJĂŶĚƚŽŽŬŝƚ͘͞zĞƐ͕/͛ŵƚĞƌƌŝĮĞĚŽĨĚĂĚ͘͟
dĞƌƌŝĮĞĚŽĨĚĂĚ͍tĞǁĞƌĞĚƵŵďĨŽƵŶĚĞĚ͘ƌŝĐŝƐĂƉĂƟĞŶƚĂŶĚƉůĂĐŝĚƉĞƌƐŽŶ͕ďƵƚƚŚĞƚƌƵƚŚĂƉƉĂƌĞŶƚůLJ
ĚŝĚŶ͛ƚŵĂƩĞƌ͘͞zŽƵĚŽŶ͛ƚŚĂǀĞƚŽŐŽŚŽŵĞ͕͟ŚĞƚŽůĚůĞdž͘͞dŚĞƌĞĂƌĞŽƚŚĞƌŽƉƟŽŶƐ͘͟ůĞdžƚŽŽŬƚŚĞƚŚĞƌĂ-‐
ƉŝƐƚĂƚŚŝƐǁŽƌĚĂŶĚǁĂůŬĞĚŽƵƚŽĨƚŚĞŽĸĐĞƚŽŐŽůŝǀĞǁŝƚŚŚŝƐŐŝƌůĨƌŝĞŶĚ͘,ĞǁĂƐϭϱ͘/ƌĞƉŽƌƚĞĚƚŚĞŝŶĐŝ-‐
dent
and
the
therapist
to
the
Department
of
Human
Services
and
called
the
police,
who
monitored
Alex
ĨƌŽŵƚŚĞĚŝƐƚĂŶĐĞ͘dǁŽͲĂŶĚͲĂͲŚĂůĨĚŝĸĐƵůƚĚĂLJƐƉĂƐƐĞĚďĞĨŽƌĞůĞdžƌĞƚƵƌŶĞĚŚŽŵĞ͕ŚŝƐďŽĚLJůĂŶŐƵĂŐĞ
meek
and
his
words—to
me,
at
least—repentant.
He
barely
spoke
to
his
father.
ƌŝĐƐĂŝĚŶŽŵŽƌĞƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚƐ͕ďƵƚ/ŝŶƐŝƐƚĞĚƚŚĂƚůĞdžŶĞĞĚĞĚĂƚƌĂŝŶĞĚĂĚƵůƚĐŽŶĮĚĂŶƚĞ͘dŚĞŶĞdžƚƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚ
ǁĂƐĂŚŝƉƉŝĞǁŚŽ͕ĂŌĞƌŵĞĞƟŶŐǁŝƚŚƵƐĂƐĂĨĂŵŝůLJ͕ƚƵƌŶĞĚƚŽůĞdžĂŶĚƚŽůĚŚŝŵŚĞůŝǀĞĚŝŶĂƚĞĞŶĂŐĞ
ŶŝƌǀĂŶĂ͘tŚĂƚĐŽƵůĚƉŽƐƐŝďůLJďĞƚŚĞƉƌŽďůĞŵ͕ŚĞĂƐŬĞĚŚŝŵ͍WĞƌŚĂƉƐŽƵƚŽĨŝŶƚĞůůĞĐƚƵĂůĐƵƌŝŽƐŝƚLJ;ŽƌĂ
ŶĞĞĚƚŽƉƌŽǀĞŵĞǁƌŽŶŐͿ͕ůĞdžĐŽŶƟŶƵĞĚƐĞĞŝŶŐƚŚĞƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚĨŽƌĂĨĞǁŵŽŶƚŚƐďĞĨŽƌĞƋƵŝƫŶŐďĞĐĂƵƐĞ
he
thought
the
therapist
might
be
“crazy.”
/ǁĂƐǁĂŝƟŶŐŝŶƚŚĞƉĂƌŬŝŶŐůŽƚŽĨƚŚĞƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚ͛ƐŽĸĐĞŽŶĞĂŌĞƌŶŽŽŶǁŚĞŶůĞdžŽƉĞŶĞĚƚŚĞĐĂƌĚŽŽƌ
and
slid
into
the
passenger
seat.
It
was
January,
and
the
wind
blew
hard
into
me.
Alex
picked
up
the
^ŶĂƉƉůĞŚĞ͛ĚůĞŌŝŶƚŚĞĐĂƌĂŶĚĚƌĂŶŬďĞĨŽƌĞƐƉĞĂŬŝŶŐ͘͞tĞƐŝƚƚŚĞƌĞ͕ĂŶĚŚĞǁĂŶƚƐŵĞƚŽĐůŽƐĞŵLJĞLJĞƐ
and
balance
my
shakras,”
he
told
me.
“ That’s
what
we
did
for
thirty
minutes,
sit
with
our
eyes
closed.”
ǀĞŶĂƐ/ƋƵĞƐƟŽŶĞĚŝĨůĞdžǁĂƐƚĞůůŝŶŐƚŚĞƚƌƵƚŚ͕/ĐŽƵůĚĨĞĞůŵLJƐĞůĨŐĞƚĂŶŐƌLJƚŚĂƚƚŚĞƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚĐŚĂƌŐĞĚ
ΨϭϬϬĂŶŚŽƵƌƚŽƐŝƚŝŶƐŝůĞŶĐĞ͘
͞ŶĚŐĞƚƚŚŝƐ͕͟ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕ƉĂƵƐŝŶŐĨŽƌĞīĞĐƚĂŶĚďĂůĂŶĐŝŶŐƚŚĞďŽƩůĞŽŶŚŝƐŬŶĞĞ͘͞zŽƵ͛ůůďĞŚĂƉƉLJƚŽŬŶŽǁ
LJŽƵ͛ƌĞƉĂLJŝŶŐĂŐƵLJƚŽƚĞůůŵĞŝƚ͛ƐŚĞĂůƚŚLJƚŽŚĂǀĞƐĞdžǁŝƚŚĂůŽƚŽĨǁŽŵĞŶďĞĨŽƌĞĐŽŵŵŝƫŶŐƚŽŽŶĞƉĞƌ-‐
ƐŽŶ͕ƚŚĂƚ/ƐŚŽƵůĚƐƚĂƌƚŝŶŝƟĂƟŶŐŶĞǁƌĞůĂƟŽŶƐŚŝƉƐŝŵŵĞĚŝĂƚĞůLJ͘͟
zŽƵŵŝŐŚƚǁĂŶƚƚŽĐŽŶƐŝĚĞƌƚŚĞƌĂƉŝƐƚƐ͘tĞŚĂĚ͘tĞǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚĂŐĂŝŶ͘dŚĞƌĞĂƌĞĂůŽƚŽĨƐĐƌĞǁĞĚƵƉƉĞŽƉůĞ
out
there.
Many
of
them
are
therapists.
ůĞdžǁĂƐŶĞĂƌŝŶŐϭϳ͕ĂƐŽƉŚŽŵŽƌĞŝŶĐŽůůĞŐĞ͘,ŝƐƚĞƐƚŽƐƚĞƌŽŶĞůĞǀĞůƐǁĞƌĞǁĂŶŝŶŐƚŽƚŚĂƚŽĨĂŵĂŶŝŶ
ŚŝƐĞĂƌůLJƚǁĞŶƟĞƐ͕ǁĞůůŽŶŚŝƐĚŽǁŶǁĂƌĚũŽƵƌŶĞLJĨƌŽŵŚŝƐƐĞdžƵĂůƉĞĂŬ͘,ĞŚĂĚƌĞĂĐŚĞĚĂƉůĂĐĞŝŶŚŝƐůŝĨĞ
ǁŚĞƌĞŚĞĐŽƵůĚŽŶĐĞĂŐĂŝŶƚŚŝŶŬ͕ĚĞďĂƚĞ͕ĂŶĚƉůĂŶ͘,ĞǁĂƐƌĂƟŽŶĂů͕ĂŶĚŚĞǁĂŶƚĞĚƚŽůŝǀĞŽŶŚŝƐŽǁŶĨŽƌ
ĂĨĞǁLJĞĂƌƐďĞĨŽƌĞŚĞůĞŌƚŚĞƐƚĂƚĞĨŽƌŐƌĂĚƐĐŚŽŽů͘ůĞdž͛ƐŚŽŵĞůĞƐƐŐŝƌůĨƌŝĞŶĚǁĂƐůŽŶŐŐŽŶĞ͘,ĞŚĂĚŚŝƐ
tĞŐĂǀĞůĞdžĂĐĂƌ͕ĂŶĚŚĞŵŽǀĞĚŽƵƚĨŽƌƐĞǀĞƌĂůŵŽŶƚŚƐďƵƚƌĞƚƵƌŶĞĚƌĞŐƵůĂƌůLJĨŽƌĨŽŽĚĂŶĚ
ĐŽŶǀĞƌƐĂƟŽŶ͘ƚϭϴŚĞďĞŐĂŶĚĂƟŶŐĂŶŽƚŚĞƌϮϭͲLJĞĂƌͲŽůĚ͕<ĂƟĞ͘dŚĞŐĂƉǁĂƐĐůŽƐŝŶŐ͘<ĂƟĞĞŶũŽLJĞĚ
ŚŝŬŝŶŐ͕LJŽŐĂ͕ŵŽƵŶƚĂŝŶĐůŝŵďŝŶŐ͕ĂŶĚǀŝĚĞŽŐĂŵĞƐ͕ĂŶĚƐŚĞǁĂƐƚŚĞĮƌƐƚŐŝƌůƚŽƚĞůůŵĞƚŚĂƚůĞdž͛Ɛ
ĐŚƌŽŶŽůŽŐŝĐĂůĂŐĞŵĂĚĞŚĞƌƵŶĐŽŵĨŽƌƚĂďůĞ͘ĐŽůůĞŐĞƐƚƵĚĞŶƚŝŶĂĮǀĞͲLJĞĂƌŵĂƚŚĞĚƵĐĂƟŽŶƉƌŽŐƌĂŵ͕
she
preferred
her
boyfriends
older
but
was
content
that
Alex
looked
the
part
with
his
full
beard
and
ĂĚƵůƚƉŚLJƐŝƋƵĞ͘/ŶĂĚĚŝƟŽŶ͕ůĞdžǁŽƵůĚŐƌĂĚƵĂƚĞǁŝƚŚŚŝƐĚĞŐƌĞĞŝŶĐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌƐĐŝĞŶĐĞĂƚϭϵ͕ƐĞǀĞƌĂů
LJĞĂƌƐďĞĨŽƌĞƐŚĞĮŶŝƐŚĞĚŚĞƌŽǁŶƉƌŽŐƌĂŵ͘
Alex
stood
in
the
kitchen
as
I
experimented
with
a
new
eggless
veggie
burger
recipe.
He
talked
as
he
dipped
chips
into
salsa.
A
strict
vegan,
Alex
had
just
apprised
me
of
new
research
on
latent
carcinogens
in
poultry
as
well
as
the
news
that
he
was
to
receive
the
award
for
the
university’s
KƵƚƐƚĂŶĚŝŶŐŽŵƉƵƚĞƌ^ĐŝĞŶĐĞ^ƚƵĚĞŶƚŽĨϮϬϭϬ͘,ŽůĚŝŶŐĂĐŽƌŶĐŚŝƉŵŝĚǁĂLJƚŽŚŝƐŵŽƵƚŚ͕ŚĞƐĂŝĚ͕
“I
appreciate
all
that
you
do
for
me.
I
know
I
couldn’t
have
come
this
far
without
you.”
DĂLJďĞůĞdžǁĂƐƌĞĨĞƌƌŝŶŐƚŽŵLJƐƵƉƉŽƌƚŽĨǀĞŐĂŶŝƐŵ͕ŚŝƐĂǁĂƌĚ͕ŽƌŚŝƐŚŽŵĞƐĐŚŽŽůŝŶŐ͘ƵƚŚĞŵŝŐŚƚ
have
also
been
referring
to
his
passage
through
precocious
puberty
and
the
anger
and
confusion
that
we’d
all
endured
because
of
it.
I’d
heard
enough
stories
about
other
teenagers
to
know
that
the
ďĞŚĂǀŝŽƌĂůƉƌŽďůĞŵƐĐŽƵůĚŚĂǀĞďĞĞŶŵƵĐŚǁŽƌƐĞ͘tĞŵŝŐŚƚŚĂǀĞŵĂĚĞŝƚĂůůƚŚĞǁĂLJƚŽDŽƵŶƚ
Doom,
but
we’d
made
it
out
safely
without
losing
an
appendage.
Or
ourselves.
Alex
had
changed.
His
hair,
receding
slightly,
was
short
and
wavy,
his
arms
were
muscled
and
strong,
and
he
no
longer
played
Sonic
the
Hedgehog
or
Zelda,
having
long
defeated
Dr.
Robotnik
and
saved
ƚŚĞƚǁŝůŝŐŚƚƉƌŝŶĐĞƐƐ͘,ĞƉůĂLJĞĚtĂƌĐƌĂŌ///ĂŶĚŐĂŵĞƐŚĞǁƌŽƚĞŚŝŵƐĞůĨ͕ďƵƚŚĞƐƟůůŚĂĚƚŚĂƚŝŵƉŝƐŚ
ŐƌŝŶ͘KŌĞŶŚĞƌĞĂĚƚŽŵĞ͕ůŽŶŐĞdžĐĞƌƉƚƐĨƌŽŵů&ƌĂŶŬĞŶĂŶĚZŝĐŚĂƌĚ&ĞLJŶŵĂŶŬƐ͘,ĞǁĂƐƐƟůů
out
of
sync
with
his
peers,
teaching
labs
for
the
University
of
Southern
Maine,
tutoring
daily,
and
ŐƌĂĚŝŶŐĨŽƌŵƵůƟƉůĞƉƌŽĨĞƐƐŽƌƐ͕ďƵƚƉƌĞĐŽĐŝŽƵƐƉƵďĞƌƚLJĂŶĚŝƚƐĞīĞĐƚƐŽŶŚŝƐůŝĨĞǁĞƌĞǁĂŶŝŶŐ͘>ŝŬĞ
&ƌŽĚŽ͕ůĞdžŚĂĚĞŵŽƟŽŶĂůƐĐĂƌƐĂŶĚŵĂŶLJƌĞŐƌĞƚƐ͘ƵƚŚĞŚĂĚƐƵƌǀŝǀĞĚ͕ĂŶĚ͕ƵŶůŝŬĞdŽůŬŝĞŶ͛ƐŵLJƚŚŝĐĂů
Middle
Earth
hero,
Alex’s
journey
was
real—and
his
story
goes
on.
ďŽƵƚ,ĞůĞŶWĞƉƉĞ
Helen
Peppe
is
a
writer
and
photographer
ǁŚŽƐĞǁŽƌŬŚĂƐĂƉƉĞĂƌĞĚŝŶĂƌƟƐƟĐ͕
ůŝƚĞƌĂƌLJ͕ĐŽŵŵĞƌĐŝĂů͕ĂŶĚĞĚƵĐĂƟŽŶĂů
ƉƵďůŝĐĂƟŽŶƐĂƌŽƵŶĚƚŚĞǁŽƌůĚ͘ƐƚƵĚĞŶƚ
in
the
University
of
Southern
Maine’s
^ƚŽŶĞĐŽĂƐƚtƌŝƟŶŐD͘&͘͘ƉƌŽŐƌĂŵ͕ƐŚĞ
ůŝǀĞƐǁŝƚŚŚĞƌĨĂŵŝůLJŝŶtĞƐƚďƌŽŽŬ͕DĂŝŶĞ͘
18
Out of Synch >>> from The Good Men Project Magazine
dŚŝƐĂƌƟĐůĞĮƌƐƚĂƉƉĞĂƌĞĚŝŶ
The
Good
Men
Project
Magazine.
ŚƩƉ͗ͬͬ'ŽŽĚDĞŶWƌŽũĞĐƚ͘ĐŽŵ
Can
a
men’s
magazine
that
takes
men’s
issues
seriously
prosper?
Do
men
want
to
read
about
what
it
means
ƚŽďĞĂŐŽŽĚŵĂŶ͍tĞ͛ƌĞbanking
on
it.
And
then
banking
on
it
some
more.
tĞŚŽƉĞLJŽƵ͛ůůĐŚĞĐŬƵƐŽƵƚ͘
dŚĞŽŽŬ :ŽŝŶhƐŽŶ&ĂĐĞŬ