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JaeMin One-Shot ruiki

ruiki
http://ruiki.livejournal.com/
_starcandy
http://community.livejournal.com/_starcandy/
2006-08-01 12:14:00
Title: Common Sensibility
Rating: PG-13 - NC-17ish (Cussing, non-graphic sex)
Pairing: JaeMin

Notes: I have no idea where this story came from, but I feel like I'm pulling a lot of sentence fragments from
other things I've written before. I was just sitting in my bathroom sink contemplating during a little bit of my
spare time (yes, I find peace by locking myself in the bathroom), and then I got struck down by the fires of
hell and damnation nine muses (or however many there are)...then this happened.

But I swear, writing this has killed me dead, it's the longest anything I've ever spewed out at one time,
therefore I cut it up to make it slightly more palatable.

1. Hearing:

This is what he hears in his dreams; I love you, I love you, I love you, but the dream is fleeting and slips out
of his grasp like the rough grains of sand that catch between his toes and swirl down the drain, gone in the
split-second of a burst of fireworks.

He wants to bury himself within the cobwebs of his mind, to fall headfirst into the promise he so desperately
wishes was real, but the harder he tries, the faster his head clears, until all he is left with is a blinding
sunlight from the waking world and the vaguely uncomfortable sensation of a tangled blanket that is slowly
suffocating his lower body.
---

ChangMin thinks that JaeJoong has a voice worth dying for. It is the voice of a thousand fallen angels, a
voice that means both hope and heartbreak, a voice that Min can recognize three seconds before he even
picks up his phone. He saves all of Jaes voicemails, replays them one by one when the nights get so long in
the winter and it feels as if dawn has just given up and left the world for dead; he falls asleep to the lull of
JaeJoongs voice and wonders if hell be woken up by the same miracle in the morning?

But a voice is just a voice, and no matter how many times he hits the repeat button on his mp3 player, Insa
doesnt seem to dull the ache in his chest.

2. Seeing:

This is what he sees in the mornings; a lean figure in a girly pink apron putting breakfast on the kitchen
table. There is a shared smile, a quiet glance that hed love to pretend meant more than what was actually
conveyed, and acknowledgment through a portion slightly bigger than all the rest.
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But the vision never lasts, because he realizes that the smile he sees is the same smile shown to everyone
else, and that the glance he wants to believe in was really meant for the person approaching from behind
him. Sitting at the table, he looks down at his bowl, fighting the harsh tears that bite like acid at the corner of
his eyes, and stuffs himself until hes vomiting right there on the tile floor. Colors spin together in front of his
face, and he finds out that no matter how full his stomach may get, there is still that horribly empty feeling
inside of him.
---

He sits on the living room couch, flipping mindlessly through all of the channels. Out of the corner of his eye,
he sees YunHo and JaeJoong having an argument. Jaes wearing a new pair of earrings, ones that YooChun
gave him; ChangMin doesnt know how he feels about that. (Or maybe he does and just isnt up to admitting
it.)

Min watches as YunHo picks up one of the couch cushions and throws it at JaeJoong, smiling as Jae flicks
him off and stalks away. He likes it when JaeJoong stalks, ChangMin thinks, Jaes sexier when hes a little
angry. Then he frowns, because its wrong of him to have thoughts like that, its wrong and he knows it.

YunHo sits down on the couch next to Min and glares at the television screen. Fucking bastard, he says,
and ChangMin grips the remote control so tightly his knuckles turn white and his fingers begin to go numb.

3. Smelling:

This is what he smells as hes helping with the laundry; lemongrass, fresh mint, and almond butter. He brings
the soft shirts to his nose, breathing in deeply, folding them slowly and carefully before stacking them neatly
in a pile.

Carrying the pile to their room, he sets it down carefully on its respective bed, lingering a little longer than
necessary, wanting so badly to just curl up within those bedsheets and drown in his scent.
---

There are so many times when he is so tired and so angry, and so tired of being angry, and hes scared
because he has nowhere to turn. ChangMin is tired of hiding the truth, and angry that JaeJoong doesnt love
him, and then tired of being angry at himself for being stupid enough to fallin love in the first place.

ChangMin feels like screaming, like biting and kicking and punching all the walls down, but instead he steals
Jaes hand lotion and jerks off in the shower, pretending that the hands around his cock belong to another
person, biting his lips so hard when he comes that it bleeds and leaves a raw, gaping cut.

A metallic scent wafts about the steamed bathroom, tainting the clean smell of Jaes cocoa butter, and as
Min slides to the ground, shampoo burning his eyes and his stomach about to come out his throat, he cant
help but feel that this is so typical of him, to take a perfectly good thing and then strangle it.

He comes out of the bathroom, wet hair dripping down his back, and runs into JunSu, who is standing right

outside the door with a crooked smirk, looking pointedly at the thin, red line making its way down
ChangMins chin.

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I think I Min begins, but whatever he wants to say is cut off as JunSu pushes past him and waltzes into
the bathroom.

I never thought Id be the one to say this to you, he tells ChangMin, grinning as he shuts the door in his
face, but just stop thinking for a while, okay?

4. Tasting:

This is how he remembers the kiss tasted; sweet, wet, and cool like the fall breeze as it sweeps through a
red-tipped forest, clean like dew on early morning grass. He remembers licking his lips afterwards, trying to
steal every last possible memory and lock them away forever in the recesses of his mind. It had been the
first, the only, the best, the worst, all of everything rolled up and melded in, lines crossing and dots pooling
together to create an obscure, black puddle of desirable nothingness in his mind.

Sometimes he wonders if a persons taste will change as he or she grows older? Does it change after they
finish a different meal? Does it change after you fall in love? He wonders what his own taste is, breathes
damply on the inside of his wrist and licks it carefully, but this doesnt tell him anything (except that he is
possibly acting a little strangely and garnering a good many stares).

He finds himself licking his lips more often now, almost obsessively at times, in an effort to recreate that
same taste; his lips are dry, and chapped, and ugly, and he thinks it is no large wonder that there hasnt
been another one.
---

When ChangMin wakes up the next morning, his mouth is immediately pervaded with the distinctly bitter
taste of dried blood. It feels crusty on his lip, a disgusting reminder of his sins; he sticks his tongue out and
tentatively presses it to his wound, deliberately applying enough pressure to make him wince.

Min wanders around, looking for a glass of water to quench the salty dryness building up at the back of his
throat. In the kitchen, he finds JaeJoong and YunHo having a glaring contest; clearly leftovers from
yesterday afternoon. They look up when ChangMin enters the room; he is about to take a drink from his
glass when YunHo stands abruptly, shoving his chair back with a drawn-out scrape against the tile.

I, he announces, enunciating each word clearly, am going to take YooChun and JunSu out for lunch. You,
he says, pointing his finger straight at the center of JaeJoongs forehead, are either going to fuck him or be
fucked by him, take your pick.

ChangMin hides his face behind his water, watching as a dusky, rose-colored blush slowly makes its way up
Jaes cheeks. Thats really cute, he realizes, and licks his lips in an unconscious motion.

When I get back, he continues, and Min wonders why hes still talking, there will be no more of this
pointless stupidity going around, there will be no more complaining and whining and bitching, and there will

be no more excessive spending of our money on hand lotion of any kind, do I make myself clear?

YunHo takes JaeJoongs nod as agreeable consent, and exits the room, although not before glaring at
ChangMin as if to say, you two make my life a living hell.
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The second time around, ChangMin finds that tastes do change, because the second kiss is slow, and hot,
sticky-sweet like caramel and thick like molasses. He feels Jaes tongue on his cut, bringing the faint taste of
iron to the back of his front teeth, and smiles so wide his lip starts bleeding again.

5. Touching:

This is what he wants to touch; the fierce expanse of pale, milky skin that is soft to the touch but burns with
the warmth of a dying supernova. He wants to touch that beautiful face, to run his thumbs across closed
eyelids and down angular cheekbones. He wants to swipe his fingers along the line of a jutting collarbone,
to palm his hands over slender shoulders and settle his forearms against a distinct ribcage and his wrists in a
loose cross at the small of a back; he wants to feel that person in his arms and their arms around him,
connected in a shape not quite a circle, but unending nonetheless.

Sight, he thinks, may be deceiving, but touch is firm reality, and every time he reaches out blindly for a hand,
he is always grateful when soft, warm skin envelops his own.
---

They are naked before ChangMin knows it, (how did they even make it to the bedroom?) and buried up to
the hilt in a velvet pleasure he has never even dreamed of, Min pauses to wonder (aloud) whether this is just
a one-sided thing or what?

JaeJoong groans insufferably, his black hair framed out around his face in a half-moon, cheeks flushed and
lips swollen, Youre the smart one, you figure it out, he says, voice breathy and slightly impatient, Now
fucking move, okay? And of course, ChangMin is all too eager to comply.

Later, floating back down to earth after a white-hot flash of sensation behind his eyes sends him spiraling
into the realm of being past the upper atmosphere of consciousness, he feels a sense of completion all
around him, because every part of Shim ChangMin is touching a part of Kim JaeJoong, and suddenly there is
no other perfection.

6. Conclusion:

This is what JaeJoong likes: ChangMin.

JaeJoong likes how ChangMin is so clueless sometimes, how he gets so caught up in the little things that he
is never quite looking at the whole picture. Jae likes how Min doesnt hear him whispering in his ear when
he sleeps, likes how he blushes when Jae calls his name, likes it when he comes home to find ChangMin
sleeping on the living room floor, having fallen off the sofa with his cell phones number pad imprinted on his
temple.

He likes how Min always checks behind him when he sees JaeJoong glancing his way, as if he was paranoid
that maybe theres someone else Jaes looking at, and he tries very hard to bite back the grin that threatens
to show through at ChangMins jealousy. Jae likes how Min smells like grass, and dirt, and energy, and he
never tires of washing ChangMins clothes. He likes Mins careful obliviousness, likes how he never realizes
that his toothbrush has been used by someone else, or that his shampoo runs out twice as fast as anyone
elses, or when he chokes back all his tears, pretending to be stronger than he really is, and saves them for
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elses, or when he chokes back all his tears, pretending to be stronger than he really is, and saves them for
when he thinks no ones watching.

JaeJoong loves the way ChangMin tastes, loves the way ChangMin fucks him, loves the way ChangMin
loves him. But JaeJoong cant help but think that for all of his intelligence, for all of those textbooks that he
memorizes and crams into his brain, for all of his maturity beyond his scant and meager years, what
ChangMin could really use is just a little more common sense.

The end. *dies now*

TAGS: author: r, genre: drama, genre: romance, length: oneshot, rating: r

10 comments

x_voracity
August 1 2006, 20:39:05 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

OOOH. I like this a lot.

I love it when stories revolve around a certain set of "things" (5 senses, 7 sins, etc.)
I really don't know what made me like this so much.
The flow was good and I think that drew me in.
And I like to think in my bathroom too, especially because I have a small counter thing to sit on.

vitiates
August 1 2006, 20:54:41 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

Wow...very nice. It seems quite realistic and wonderful. Something is very captivating about it, just seems to
draw you in. Well done! I'm putting this into my memeories...

awesome
August 1 2006, 23:56:59 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

Hello, fic. You're going in my lj memories now.

Daaaaaymn, woman. I'm reading this at 7am and I can't tear my eyes away from every little word you've
written. As soon as I'm done commenting, I'm reading this a second time. And dude. Your Yunho OWNS. XD
(and there will be no more excessive spending of our money on hand lotion of any kind, do I make myself
clear? OMG.)

biting his lips so hard when he comes that it bleeds and leaves a raw, gaping cut.

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Ahaahaha. HAHAhahA. *Isshot* I thought of that when I saw the clip. I'm not a pervert NO.

ruiki
August 1 2006, 23:59:56 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

Heeeeee, MusiQ clip. I was counting on you to read my mind.

awesome
August 2 2006, 00:03:12 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

I was SO fixated with it. I think that's why I've not deleted it yet. XDD

s7nluv
August 2 2006, 00:16:44 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

haha...i love the ending!...i really like this too...and i espeically like it wen min is contemplative...and the
yunho and jae bit was kute...but um the blood...*shivers*...i hate pain and blood...but strangely in this fic i was
transfixed by it...n e waise...can't wait for more!

prince_ryu
August 2 2006, 12:04:05 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

This is really good!! I love the ending. Haha. &Yunho raawkks. Love what he said. Go leader! xD

hanjae
August 3 2006, 06:07:10 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

*sticks in memories* :DDD!

That was so, so good <3 I love how you make even the raw sex sound pretty and subtle.

Now my life would be complete if Bambi was in the picture >D

debx3
February 8 2011, 01:07:28 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

I will die after thanking you for writing this.

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I will die after thanking you for writing this.

Thank you <3

nicotine_gum
April 19 2011, 12:48:02 UTC CHECK COLLAPSE

Love this *mems*

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