Vu 1

Viet Vu
Speiser
Writing 2
WP1 Revision Sheet
Focus: The main point that I wanted to correct was to elaborate more on pathos, logos, and
ethos. My original paper focused heavily on the analysis of content, style, and purpose. The
source of my revision was a comment written by my professor, You are missing some of the
rhetorical analysis terminology of ethos, pathos, logos, but your examination of content, tone,
purpose, and audience make up for it. I changed the analysis towards having a more complete
essay that has a good balance between all of these concepts, instead of focusing on a few
concepts and ignoring others.
Supplementation: Another focus was the inclusion of discourse communities. It is a new
concept that we learned after completing this assignment, so I obviously didnt write about them
in my original work project. I did analyze the target audience of each genre, but on a very surface
level. So, I supplemented my analysis of target audience with a deeper analysis on discourse
communities.
Small Corrections: There are a lot of small corrections I chose to make, mostly in terms of
grammar. However, I also went through the essay and chose to make my writing more concise. A
huge problem for me was that I wrote too much and had to cut out a page and a half for my
original assignment. I wanted to challenge myself and go through individual sentences to be
more concise. However, with the inclusion of discourse communities and more analysis of ethos,
pathos, and logos, the essay itself will approximately be the same length.
Concluding Thoughts: I believe that I have made my work a lot more balanced and concise. As
a previous journalist, a goal was to write without fluff. There was a lot less fluff than I had
thought when going back through my writing, but nevertheless, I shortened multiple sentences.
However, I also wanted to add more analysis to certain concepts, so the essay overall is the same
length, if not a little longer. The main goal for me was to make my analysis on the paper more
balanced. I successfully added more focus on some rhetorical analysis terminology and less on
content.
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Americas Typical Sunday, Football

Football is a necessity of American culture. It has become a staple to the American

identity, much like the Statue of Liberty, cowboys, inflated food portions, and even freedom. The

proof of footballs impact is shown in the fact that Super Bowl Sunday is the second-highest food

consumption day, after Thanksgiving. However, football can be seen through many different

perspectives, or genres. One magazine article might write about the personal life of a distressed

player, like Time for Odell Beckham Jr. to grow up (Raanan 2017). A different article might

simply be used to hype up the next game, like the article, Ultimate Super Bowl LI Preview

(Aldridge 2017). However, magazine articles are getting less popular, because we are in the days

of video recaps. You can get the information you want by just watching five minutes of,

Redskins vs. Falcons, Week 5 highlights. (NFL), or if you want to relive a certain play in the

past, look up, Seahawks vs. Packers, Week 2 Highlights (NFL). The sports video industry

hasnt just change the way people view football, but also the way they view all news. Though

both traditional sports-related magazine articles and sports recaps have the same function of

presenting information, sports video recaps have recently gained popularity, seemingly

simultaneously killing the traditional magazine industry.

A magazines goal is to keep the readers attention. A magazine article is short because

too long of an article will bore the reader. To aid in excitement, articles are supplemented with

visuals. For example, the article about the Super Bowl has graphs and charts that are used to

break the text apart and give the readers mind a break from reading pure text. Tone is important

in articles; it is casual, but professional. This tone appeals to the sense of ethos in readers. Sports

fan wont trust someone that has no prior experience in the sport, so writers have to have a

background in the field, either by having a degree in sports journalism or previously playing the
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sport at a high level. This background is the main factor that appeals to ethos. In the Beckham

article, the author writes, His play on the field factored way more into the equation a postgame

hissy fit (Raanan 2017). The phrase hissy fit really makes the sentence feel casual, even

childish. However, within the same article the author wrote, It may take some introspection and

internal adjustments to make this happen (Raanan). The use of this statement makes the author

sound credible. This balance causes the author to seem friendly, but knowledgeable. This is

important because articles are presented with the trouble of having to appeal to various discourse

communities. It is difficult for a casual fan to read an article if the author throws out a lot of

jargon and concepts that they dont understand. Conversely, a member of the sports fandom

discourse community will not respect an author if he does not sound knowledgeable enough.

This precise balance has to appeal to the ethos of both sports fan and casual readers.

On the flip side, sports recap videos have been on the rise. These videos have the main

purpose of presenting a lot of information within a time limit of usually 10 minutes. The time

limit is established to make sure the audience doesnt get bored and click away. They also need

to be timely, meaning they need to be released as soon as a game ends. These videos are usually

formatted to present information that appeals to the audiences pathos first, hooking the viewer.

For example, a video usually starts off with key facts like if a player is injured. This information

appeals to pathos, as lots of fans are emotionally attached to certain teams or players. Then, it

continues with visual clips of key plays, and finishes with statistics that appeal to the viewers

sense of logos, so they can gain some knowledge before the video ends.

Furthermore, those that watch these video recaps are also members of the sports fandom

discourse community. Those part of the community usually want to keep up with everything on

sports; so, they dont care about the tone of the commentator, they just want facts. Appealing to
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this community is harder, as they can tell if a commentator or analyst actually knows what they

are talking about or are just reading off a prompt. To appeal to the ethos of this community, many

of the workers are ex-pro athletes or have been analyzing sports for many years. It is very rare to

find new analysts in this community. This audience cares more about credentials than style,

giving the videos freedom to either be casual or formal. One style is shown in the NFL recap

video, Seahawks vs Packers, Week 2 Highlights. The commentator has been an analyst for

over 15 years and has a more upbeat tone. He is accompanied by two ex-pro athletes, who are

making funny remarks, which is heard when one complimented a player saying, Go baby Doug,

Im proud of you baby (NFL). Like articles, casual commentary is more popular because it

helps keep viewers not feel lectured. Coincidentally, it is more preferred by creators too, as

viewers will want to watch more, creating more revenue.

In addition to the style of commentating, a key piece of these videos is the presence of

jargon. For example, in the same recap video, the main commentator said, Its picked off by

Elliot, but he fumbled the ball (NFL). To those who know football, this is a relatively simple

sentence to understand, but to those who dont, they might know what it means to get picked, or

what a fumble might be. This jargon is added for two specific reasons. One, it shortens the video.

Instead of having to explain each play in excruciating detail of what is happening, they can sum

up 20 seconds of play in one sentence. Secondly, jargon presents this sense of professionalism

and appeals to the ethos of sports fan. Knowing what a fumble is makes the viewer feel that

the person commentating is knowledgeable in his field.

Despite the differences, both genres are now seamlessly getting integrated with one

another. Each new online sports article seems to have a video recap accompanying it that

summarizes the article, and vice versa. Consequently, the integration seem good for both
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businesses! However, the sports-related magazine industry is still slowly dying, while sports

video recaps are still on the rise. This is weird because both of them are quick, easily accessible,

and usually free. So is there a correlation? Simply put, quite maybe possibly? The fight between

these two mediums isnt black and white.

If the sports video recap market keeps expanding, there will be less need to pick up a

magazine. They are more popular because they are shorter, take up less effort to watch, and the

most important factor, they show footage. The importance in footage is evident in the Beckham

Jr. article, which states, Beckham finished his playoff debut with four catches for 28 yards on 11

targets (Raanan 2017). This statement is necessary in the article because it tells how poorly

Beckham Jr. performed, supporting the authors argument on Beckhams maturity. But, no matter

how in depth the article goes on Beckhams on-field struggles, one might contend that it can not

compare to the impact of actual footage. A video recap of the game can physically show all the

drop passes and the frustration on his face appealing to the viewers pathos versus simply stating

his statistics, which appeals to their logos. In media, there has been a trend to appeal to pathos

over logos. The trend is rooted in the fact that the average fan loves to hear about drama and feel

the emotion on field rather than reading in depth sheet filled with statistics that are hard to

understand without being a part of sports fandom. Creators want to appeal to the casual fan

because sports fans will keep watching no matter the content, but the casual fan would watch

other videos if the recaps arent interesting enough. The more views a video gets; the more profit

it generates, so it makes sense why they are trying so hard to appeal to casual fans.

Undoubtedly, sports recap videos created a new genre, where any topic is recapped.

These recap videos no longer only recap sports; they have expanded to different topics like

celebrity gossip and political news. However, there is an issue of presenting a large amount of
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information in little time. A recap can go through a lot of topics, but it is impossible to go in

depth about each topic within the time frame. This is where magazines will continue to live, for

those who want to read on specific topics. For example, in the Seahawks vs Packers, one of the

side commentators said, Tyler Lockett, I really like that rookie. He is going to be big one day in

this league (NFL). The video then goes back to recapping the game, ignoring the rookie. A

viewer that is interested in Lockett can research him by reading articles that highlight him.

This means that the magazine industry is not going to die. They will live through

providing in depth information on specific topics. This change provides evidence that eventually,

the audience for these two genres will essentially switch. Those interested in video recaps will

not be the niche members of sports fandom; but, instead, they are the general audience who want

to hear all types of news. Conversely, each magazine article will target a certain niche group of

people. Clearly, video recaps and magazine articles have their own strengths and weaknesses, but

they are still able to coexist harmoniously and they will continue to for the foreseeable future.
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Works Cited:

Aldridge, Ben. "Ultimate Super Bowl LI Preview." ESPN. ESPN Internet Ventures, 21 Jan. 2017.

Web. 31 Jan. 2017.

Raanan, Jordan. "Time for Odell Beckham Jr. to Grow up." ESPN. ESPN Internet Ventures, 10

Jan. 2017. Web. 31 Jan. 2017.

NFL. "Seahawks vs. Packers, Week 2 Highlights." YouTube. YouTube, 20 Sept. 2015. Web. 31

Jan. 2017.

NFL. "Redskins vs. Falcons, Week 5 Highlights." YouTube. YouTube, 11 Oct. 2015. Web. 31 Jan.

2017.