April 2nd notes and observations

I wish I had begun this sooner, as so much could have been buffered for those going through
stuff needing some insight. I lost so much I could have given to those in need from thinking it
needed to be a certain way. At least 30 pages, some art, something witty, opening entire
gateways of frequencies in under a hundred pages.
Moving on, I found solace & refuge in Venus conjunct again by retrograde with Chiron. It is
work, too, though. It is a refuge, as stated, but you can't loiter. You can't just hover and expect,
and take in the hand out. The price is ground breaking self discovery. The price is
conscientious self improvement. Also, it is to extend beyond the sphere of what you even were
calling your self.

By April 20, that really peaks.

The rude and selfish will be getting raw & rampant as Mercury and Saturn go retrograde
Mercury back through Aries hitting hard and Saturn in Sag. One thing I've felt just today is a
cloud of willingness to do injury and trick other to protect blessings or fortunes. Unfair
strategies to snatch yours. Attitudes of, Well, animals do it and it's been going on since the
beginning of time. After how 2016 went, I need this.

All of it can be fairly easily avoided, but what are you going to give up to get that root in there?
Plant the root in your life. I see that now. I see black and deep, and I feel this black and deep
and the soil and an extending vast root becoming a network refusing to die off. When
undeniable fires consume, the surface has no choice but to learn rebirth, but rebirth is
possible as the root system has penetrated deep in the black. Underground and deep protects
you from what ravages over that which is in constant flux already. You cannot keep that, nor
maintain your self in there, without being ready to be tossed about hard or even devoured
ceaselessly.

Mid June will bring us a major grand fire trine with Saturn and Sun opposition. Sun in
Gemini, Saturn yet in Sag. Great rushes of energy combined with angst and the yet
unrelenting urges and passions to do the harm or deceptions to keep or steal blessing or good
fortune. Mercury will conjunct that Gemini Sun, as it becomes okay among so many what is
not nailed down is okay to off with, and there is a giant orgy of whatever I can grab to not lose
my design for life infecting what could otherwise be great, warm times filled with creativity,
bonding, and trust in the spontaneous with that whatever you believe in has got your back.

Flippant, free, and flighty as fuck ongoing into the Summer.

Current Mars in Taurus trine Pluto in Capricorn has given many impetus or even necessity to
get their foot down hard planted to heave a full charge run at their life's mission. An If not
now, maybe never sense of urgency. To own that urgency rather than be owned by it. To be
aware it exists but you want to leverage to where it cannot run you. There is some
characteristic Capricorn heaviness or even disparaging to get with this. A sense of feeling the
need to bolt at the same time get hold on something. Something not at all like the moon which
is shifting, but moving in a permanence.
A course of the self determined whys, what for, reasons you came here. Your will and vision of
what you came to be and do.
It's being challenged maybe harder than ever in life so far, it feels like.

There is temptation to sort out too much. That would be True Node in Virgo. I wrote a bit on
that in the earlier recent offering. It's natural to be working in the Virgo matters, but in that
frame have you been over-sorting and weeding out the soil itself because you don't want to
deal in the dark. Hovering over the surface in blooms is so Spring mood! Why not? There's a
fire pulsing through to cover all things, though.

New projects should have already been underway with goals being met and quotas fulfilled.
You should already have sorted out, and not just for the wanting, but for what would be best
for the legacy and growth. If you have used efforts toward harnessing the fire into what's going
on in Pisces with Venus' play along with Chiron, everything fliipant, free, flighty and ready to
commit fouls to steal and clinch their good times and thrills is not going to hit you hard.
Your roots are deep.

All these things require a basis in feeling it. So, did you use all the passion, drive, action and
spontaneous surging to at the same time develop intuitively, empathically, even psychically.
Spiritually; did you care to use that all for a grander picture and big design? Your self
determined life's reason or exactly what your heart is for, why you carry on everyday.

No matter what you believe in, there is a legacy being woven now.

What do I do with all these extra sensory things and all this experience that has blown up for
me? You have to ground that flow into something substantial, or take solace instead with that
a thing is not going to survive the fires. Directing intelligence. You will want to make great
effort toward directing, yet kick start your heart if it isn't on high. It will take much patience,
allowing, and your main action being in that you are undaunted in manifesting that you are
the bigger, better person.

Jupiter Retrograde square Pluto in cardinal Earth & Air: how do you cope with getting things
running smoothly and fluidly when the momentum seems out of your control or the Ease is
slipping thru your fingers?

Jupiter opposite Mercury & Uranus in late March. Our need to rebel and invent becomes one
with our message and gives us a sense of quickness and lightness, but at the expense of
fairness and sharing genuinely. Even good faith shattered, putting aside obligation to others
or even the mildest feeling of being held back for any reason causing disastrous behavior all
around.

Mercury square with Puto, too, late March. Now heading to trine w/ Saturn at the moment of
retrograde where the Sun will transit Taurus at cusp w/ Aries: Powerful kicking loose.
A raging bull is going off, knowing full well these constraints are not natural and we were
never meant to have them like this. A season of rape and violence. Most are familiar with the
tales of the feminine divine going to the underworld ruler in the Fall through Winter. Yet, here
we much the opposite. The emergence is turbulent, infernal, awesome in terrific lust to tear to
get to the thing desired. A feeling of being at the edge of all things looms.
The desire to trample underfoot what is perceived as worthless among people.

Again, take refuge in soft art, in beautiful imagery. In kisses and warm genuine embrace
rather than this rampant orgy blood feast. You at first might think you are riding that because
you were born hardcore and ready, but it will be such a vastly consuming wild fire. Crucial to
speak, is that it still can and will help you. Do not get caught in the urgency of it. Get into your
zen zone. Find and expect yourself and the fire will blossom to a gateway and natural
propulsion. Know that it's beautiful and natural to engender the calm distance. For this
stretch, many will feel they've been given no choice but to fight, fuck, rip apart and get in faces
for the full life experience.

Mars sextile Neptune late March...now sextile the Venus Chiron conjunct: charging and
solidifying the shifting/turbulent into a gel, and structuring what was once all up in the air or
disheveled. Giving your dreams ground and manifesting of the ethereal and subtle, before the
obvious devours you. Immense beauty that is even capable of driving to madness.

There may be fears in it of wanting it to last, a tension or pang of that so much beauty you've
experienced was not lasting and is not ever able to.
Venus & Merc conjunct [mid March] then Sun conjunct Venus late March as Uranus &
Mercury line up prior to Merc Retrograde: Art is Rebellion is breaking free is beautiful.
Revolution or upheaval is [suddenly] one with taking care of yourself. Out of balance is loving
yourself..is being Stronger Than _______..is what's beautiful about my opportunity of self
discovery. Testing and even light pushing will do tragic effect on what is otherwise beautiful
yet fragile and in you or meant for you.

Venus Rx will reconjunct Chiron [mentioned]: if you are into upgrading, spiritually strong
undertaking, use this. Venus direct with these other crucial retrogrades.

April 26 Powerful Taurus new moon, and Mars square True Node before transiting to Leo.

I see a warrior covered in most radiant expensive armor, but the armor is covered in so much
blood and red earth that only rays break through, nearly more visible and lit up from the pure
garnet red of blood and earth. Introduce as much growing things as possible into this. Add as
much green and reconnecting with both nature and growing things, but blending with we have
this in common, and be one with all growing things, and reciprocating be girded by all that is
in you wanting to grow and continue...you as, and as you.
Expect to be involved in the martial realms, though.

If you need further assistance, I am available.

I need further assistance

My best,
Kotter