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Mobilizing pride/shame: Lesbians, tourism and


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Mobilizing pride/shame: lesbians, tourism and parades
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Social & Cultural Geography, Vol. 8, No. 1, February 2007

Mobilizing pride/shame: lesbians, tourism


and parades

Lynda Johnston
Department of Geography, Tourism & Environmental Planning, University of Waikato, Private
Bag 3105, Hamilton, Aotearoa/New Zealand, LYNDAJ@waikato.ac.nz

In this paper I focus on Pride Scotland in order to examine the construction and
performance of lesbian tourism geographies. Queer theories are used to argue that
tourism spaces of Pride Scotland provide important sites for the examination of the
co-construction of pride and shame for lesbian parade participants. Within these sites
celebrations of pride are underscored by notions of shame. Pride/shame politics may be
productive and are lived through gendered and sexualized bodies. I rely on three sets of
qualitative data for this research: (1) individual and focus group interviews with lesbian
and queer parade participants; (2) participant observations and autobiography; and (3)
media reports. The paper describes a particular Edinburgh groupa womens drumming
bandthat performs for Pride. These participants actively choose to perform their
subjectivities in ways they understand challenge heteronormalcy. Discursive constructions
of Edinburgh as a gendered and sexualized city are discussed in relation to Pride Scotland.
I argue that Pride in Edinburgh is predicated on notions of sexualized shame. I examine
how queer women negotiate hostile and/or indifferent reactions to their bodily
performances. In this way I aim to explore the relationships between pride/shame,
performativity, gender, sexuality and politics of resistance.

Key words: pride, shame, lesbian, tourism, queer, performativity.

Introduction to inform understandings of lesbian tourism


space.
This paper examines the construction and I have participated in numerous parades and
performance of lesbian subjectivities in tour- in many different, sometimes overlapping,
ism spaces. It responds to recent calls to roles (as a parade participant, an organizer
consider gender in queer tourism (Puar and as a researcher). My experiences of pride
2002a). Specifically, I discuss the centrality of are also about experiences and affects of
particular gendered embodiments of queer shame. This shame may be the body saying
at Pride Scotland. In doing so I wish to build that it cannot fit in although it desperately
on emerging work in queer tourism and, in wants to (Probyn 2004: 345). In order
particular, to use theoretical discussions con- to explore these embodied ideas of shame
cerning the performance of pride and shame and pride, autobiography is combined with

ISSN 1464-9365 print/ISSN 1470-1197 online/07/010029-17 q 2007 Taylor & Francis


DOI: 10.1080/14649360701251528
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30 Lynda Johnston

participant observation, material from focus a number of hegemonies. To this end, I am


groups, individual interviews and media both dismayed (shamed?) and encouraged
reports. My feelings of pride and shame are (proud?) with the affects of gay pride parades
offered in order to raise questions about and their framing and performance as a tourist
subject, identity and subjectivity (Moss event. One the one hand, tourist spaces of
2001: 8). I draw on Eve Sedgwicks (1993, parades provide an opportunity to queer
2003) and Elspeth Probyns (2004) work on space, to be camp, to enjoy the celebrations
shame as productive to argue that pride politics that a street party can provide and challenge
are entwined with a spatial politics of shame. heteronormalcy. A focus on celebration has
Pride/shame politics have affects and are lived dominated much of the existing literature of
through gendered and sexualized bodies and sexuality and space (Puar 2002a). On the
spaces. Pride Scotland 2001 was held in other hand, parades as tourist spectacles may
Edinburgh and the citys sexualized politics strengthen western dichotomous categoriz-
provides the spatial focus for this paper. A focus ations of homosexuality and heterosexuality
on the co-construction of pride and shame for as distinct, separate and hierarchical subjec-
lesbian parade participants may help question tivities (see Johnston 2001, 2002).
taken for granted distinctions between affect, In some cases, being gay signifies the
emotion, biography, and the places in which we normalization and desexualization of a more
live our daily lives (Probyn 2004: 328). radical queer past (Crimp 2002). The pacifica-
For some time I have been concerned with tion of queer politics is, according to Douglas
acknowledging and theorizing subjectivities in Crimp (2002) a matter of aligning the desires
queer tourism spaces. In particular, for over of gays and lesbians with those of a
eleven years I have conducted research on gay heterosexual middle-class. Crimp believes
pride parades, beginning with southern hemi- that notions of shame are the key to under-
sphere parades such as the Auckland HERO standing these paradoxes of gay pride. In this
Parade in Aotearoa New Zealand and the paper I show that pride and shame are co-
Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras in constructions and have spatial and embodied
Australia (Johnston 2005). Between 1998 affects (Barber and Clark 2002, Crimp 2002,
and 2001 I lived in Edinburgh and took the Sedgwick 2003). I will argue that the public
opportunity to participate in, and research, performance of Pride Scotland may bring
Pride Scotland as well as other European about the shame affect (as theorized by Eve
parades, such as World Pride Roma in 2000. Sedgwick 2003 and Silvan Tomkins 1995; see
These parades take their starting points from also Ash 2005; Gibbs 2002; Probyn 2004).
the New York Stonewall riots which began on Shame may arise from a desire to fit in, and at
a June night of 1969 when police raided a gay the same time, a feeling of being out of place.
bar, called the Stonewall Inn, in Greenwich Individually and collectively, shame is a
Village, New York City. Three days and two response to others. Probyn (2004: 328) notes
nights of rioting represent the first time in US that shame is indicative of how the con-
history when gays and lesbians publicly tagiousness of collective affects works to
protested and resisted police harassment. My expose any breaches in the borders between
work centres on the ways in which pride self and other.
parades may be considered emancipatory In what follows I first situate this research
events and have the potential to reinscribe within tourism literature that calls for the
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Mobilising pride/shame 31

examination of lesbian geographies. Second, using theories of intersectionality. She maps


the paper moves on to describe a particular out the ways in which discussions of queer
Edinburgh groupa womens drumming tourism and queer space have occluded
bandthat performs for Pride. These partici- questions of gender.
pants actively choose to perform their sub- A special issue of the journal Gay and
jectivities in ways they understand challenge Lesbian Quarterly (2002) entitled Queer
heteronormalcy. Perspectives of queer women Tourism: Geographies of Globalization is
provide some reflection on pride parades the first edited collection to address same-sex
as contradictorycelebratory/oppressive, sexuality and travel. The special issue docu-
proud/shaminggendered and sexualized ments, describes and theorizes the growth
spaces. Third, the discursive constructions of of gay and lesbian tourism as well as other
Edinburgh as a gendered and sexualized city are forms of queer travel. Furthermore, the
discussed in relation to Pride Scotland. I argue special issue makes explicit the importance of
that Pride in Edinburgh is predicated on notions queer sexualities to tourism, globalization
of sexualized shame. Finally, I examine how and economic systems. Editor Jasbir Puar
queer women negotiate hostile and/or indiffer- (2002b: 1) notes: queer tourism is still one of
ent reactions to their bodily performances. the least researched or discussed topics in
In this way I aim to explore the relationships scholarly venues. Many of the articles focus
between pride/shame, performativity, gender, on spatial politics of tourism, such as Venetia
sexuality and politics of resistance. Kantsas (2002) account of lesbian tourism in
Eresos, on the Greek island of Lesvos. Kantsa
(2002) documents the bodily and landscape
Queering tourism changes of the lesbian resort and argues that
this is an extraordinary place that enables
In recent years academics have been paying lesbian gazes, a focus on the history of the lyric
attention to queer tourism. Soile Veijola and poet Sappho, and women-only spaces that are
Eeva Jokinen were, to my knowledge, the first usually not feasible in other tourist places.
to raise concerns regarding gendered and Puar (2002b: 3), who is dismayed at the lack
sexualized bodies and tourism when they of attention in queer tourism paid to women,
posed the question: is it possible to thematise lesbians and gender, notes that her article is
the embodiment, radical Otherness, multiplicity unique in that it is possibly the only to focus
of differences, sex and sexuality in tourism? exclusively on lesbian and queer womens
(Veijola and Jokinen 1994: 129). Constructing tourism. While adding analyses of lesbians to
imagined and daring dialogues (but relying on tourism studies begins to challenge tourisms
real quotes), and focusing on the materiality of masculinity, it may be more productive to
gendered and sexualized bodies, they critique consider, however, the ways in which space,
various tourism theoreticians as producers of mobility and tourism are gendered and
disembodied tourism studies knowledge. sexualized. Puar (2002b: 4) states: [T]he
The absence of work in tourism studies focus on mens travel, to the exclusion of
dealing with women, lesbians and gender is womens, is both a historically entrenched
highlighted by Jasbir Puar (2002a) and Marie problem and a failure to incorporate gendered
Cieri (2003). Puar (2002a) thinks through the analyses into conceptualisations of tourism
relationship between queer tourism and space and travel.
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32 Lynda Johnston

Other papers in this collection begin to by a journalist at World Pride Roma, 2000
question and theorize the relationship between (Luongo 2002). The other paper engages with
queer tourism and globalization. Gabriel material from the Sydney Gay and Lesbian
Giorgi (2002), in his article Madrid en Mardi Gras (Markwell 2002). Both of these
transito: travelers, visibility, and gay identity articles offer insights into how global tourism
argues that the political transformations in has altered the spatial relations of place and
Spain have made gay and lesbian tourism in subjectivities of local regions. Markwell (2002)
Madrid possible. He argues that gay tourism highlights the relationship of place to time and
becomes a sign of global circulation and that it notes that Sydney Mardi Gras is successful
sets in motion a narrative that locates bodies because of temporal containment that ensures
in a geopolitical order, making them visible in the transgressive features are moderated by
some ways and determining their visibility the limitations of place and time. As a
under different conditions (Giorgi 2002: 73). consequence, particular bodies dominate the
Also discussing cities and queer visibility, pride event, while other queer bodies, such as
Dereka Rushbrook (2002) argues that local working-class and non-white lesbians and
changes in queer space are related to the global gays, are marginalized.
commodification of space and bodies through The hard won equalities since Stonewall are,
tourism. She found cities queer spaces came in many pride events, belied by the material
to functionand were promotedas exotic ways in which harassment and disciplining of
mixes of the Other. The promotion of gay queer bodies has increased. As I go on to
neighborhoods as yet another commodity sketch out in this article the politics of Pride
leads to a form of assimilation into main- Scotland are tied to, and dependent on, a
stream culture that reinforces the assimilation politicsand performance ofshame. Shame
created by the production of the gay and is, Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick (1993: 9) writes,
lesbian niche market (Rushbrook 2002: 198). an affect that delineates identity but . . .
State practices are the topic of Puars without defining it or giving it content and it
(2002c: 101 137) article in this collection is at the very centre of subjectivity formations.
entitled: Circuits of queer mobility: tourism,
travel and globalisation. She documents Shame points and projects; shame turns itself skin
several shifts in the gay and lesbian tourism side out; shame and pride, shame and dignity,
industry during the last ten years which shame and self-display, shame and exhibitionism
include an increase in international travel, a are different interlinings of the same glove. Shame,
change from private industrys marketing to it might be finally said, transformational shame, is
nations public marketing aimed at queer performance. (Sedgwick 2003: 38, emphasis in
travellers. She is critical of the ways in which original)
the tourism industry reifies queer travellers as
gay white affluent males and calls for a more Sedgwick (2003) argues that there are power-
critical approach to the study of queer tourism ful and identifiably queer ways of thinking
that would include different axes of subjectiv- about shame. She claims that shame is a
ity, such as gender, race, class and so on. uniquely productive affect that vivifies and
Two papers in this special issue of the Gay consolidates the subject in the moment it
and Lesbian Quarterly address gay pride isolates subjects. Shame brings the subject into
parades. One is an ethnographic account being the instant of seeing that one is being
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Mobilising pride/shame 33

seen and acknowledged by another. It is (Sydney, Auckland, Rome). All the data have
productive and corrosive of queer identity been collected, transcribed and analysed by
and the subject may oscillate between being a myself, therefore I am very familiar with the
wall flower and being a diva (Crimp 2002: material. In order to substantiate the themes
65). Shaming works performatively. I thought were emerging from the data,
I conducted searches for key words and
Saying Shame on you or For shame, casts shame phrases. I also looked for words and phrases
onto another that is both felt to be ones own and, at that might challenge the patterns that I thought
the same time, disavowed as ones own. But in those were emerging. An extensive collection of
already shamed, the shame-prone, the shame is not newspaper articles and video transcripts on
so easily shed, so simply projected: it manages also parades, sexuality and the city have been
to persist as ones own. This can lend it the capacity catalogued and indexed into themes. Feminist
for articulating collectivities of the shamed. (Crimp and post-structural perspectives are used to
2002: 66) analyse the data (Moss 2002). My own
position in this research is somewhat ambiva-
Pride parades are visible expressions of lent. Rather stereotypically, I love a parade
collectivities which may homogenize experi- and a performance, in fact, any excuse to dress
ence and exclude those who do not conform to up! Throughout the research, however, I have
norms. Parades, then, are complicit with continually questioned parade politics and
conventional indignities (the shamed) (Crimp have come to no easy answer regarding their
2002). It may be possible, however, to move validity for equality and the expression of
beyond a binary understanding of pride and difference. From this ambivalent position,
shame as separate entities and to rethink I was excited and nervous about performing
pride/shame through demonstrative affects. in Pride Scotland 2001.
Pride parades are a peculiarly privileged
vantage point from which to consider pride/
shames relationship with performativity, Queer drummers
gender, sexuality and politics of resistance.
The next section draws from empirical I was a member of a womens drumming band
material collected when I participated and that performed in Pride Scotland 2001 in
performed in a womens drumming group in Edinburgh. This drumming band formed in
Pride Scotland on 23 June 2001. I draw on this January 1996 and performs at various festivals
experience and also two focus groupsone and gigs such as the International Womens
with twelve participants, the other with Day March in Edinburgh, the famous Edin-
threeand an individual interview were held burgh Torchlight Procession, Hogmanay,
two weeks after Pride Scotland. Gay news- Murrayfield Rugby Stadium for international
papers are also analysed in order to argue that rugby matches, Manchester Mardi Gras, and
lesbian parade groups employ different strat- of course, Pride Scotland. The Drumming
egies depending on the pride/shame politics of band members carry and play heavyweight
the parade. This Edinburgh fieldwork does not surdos, high-pitched repeniques, snare-drums,
stand alone. As I mentioned earlier, this paper tambourines, shakers and bells, to create a
comes out of a sustained project about tourism samba-type swing sound as they march for
and several gay pride parades in Western cities Pride. Scotland has a strong drumming and
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34 Lynda Johnston

marching tradition from which many women people were walking. Compared to parades in
drumming groups have formed.1 London, Manchester, Sydney or Auckland, we
Of the twenty women drummers that were a small but colourful and loud Pride
performed in Pride Scotland 2001, sixteen celebration. In Sedgwicks terms, our drum-
self-identified as lesbian, two as bisexual and ming was a performative of pride.
two as heterosexual. Hence my use of the term Our bodies and our drums were dressed in
queer, as this diverse group of women live various shades of purple, silver, black and
different sexualized lives, but all are critical of adorned with glitter. Some of us wore wigs,
gendered and sexualized power relations. some of us exposed flesh with sparkly bras and
The adoption of the identity queer raises shorts, and others had Xena-like outfits. In a
several concerns and it is a term that few surprising reversal some butch lesbians that
lesbians tend to choose for themselves. The turn might regularly wear boots and jeans wore
to the word queer, however, is meant to mark for the first timefrocks and feather boas. We
difference between and within lesbians, and were all hyped up (Bell, Binnie, Cream and
between and within gay men, in relation to race Valentine 1994: 31) and we had a place to go
and its attendant differences of class or ethnic (Knopp 1995). We were visually performing
culture, generational, geographical, and socio- public subjectivities that were outside our
political location as central (de Lauretis 1991: normalized embodied experiences, and as
viii). In a broader context queer theory provides such, we looked and felt very camp which
ways to understand sexualities such as lesbian, added to the festive mood of the assembly
gay or pan-sexual, as well as that which might point. Another surprising reversal was that it
be odd, strange, indeed queer (de Lauretis was a warm sunny day in Edinburgh. In a
1991; Jagose 1996). It also constantly desta- focus group interview after the parade one of
blizes taken-for-granted ideas by rejecting any the drummersKaren2stated that Pride was
fixed or stable notions of sexuality and gender. a special drumming event because she says
Queer theory offers a critical approach to that her partner Christine is very excited
knowledge construction, including gay and about all the lesbians! Moira thought it was a
lesbian studies, identity politics and even itself special event for her because its the only gig
(Jagose 1996; Brown 2000). Put another way, with champagne before it. It was agreed by
queer theory demands that social scientists the drumming group that Pride Scotland was
recognize how heteronormalcy can blatantly about celebration. Christine sums this up when
and/or subtly taint the way we think and write she says:
about sexuality. Performing in Pride enables an
articulation of both queer celebration and Christine: Its a very personal celebration for some.
protest against normative and oppressive forms We get dressed up especially for it. We decorate our
of sexuality. drums, we decorate ourselves. We get more into it,
On the day of Pride Scotland the drumming visually. (First Edinburgh focus group, 2 July 2001)
group met at the assembly point of the
paradethe back streets of the Old Town Getting more into it visually is rewarding for
(Figure 1). Approximately 1000 2000 other both the parade participants, as well as the
people were also gathering and preparing to audience. Pride parades may exaggerate the
march for Pride. A decorated bus and truck processes by which bodies and places become
were the only motorized parade entries as most gendered and sexualized. Audiences expect
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Mobilising pride/shame 35

Figure 1 Drumming group at Pride Scotlands starting point. Source: authors own collection.

to see bodies (with or without clothing) that . . . between the thing as meaning something,
defy normative assumptions of gendered and anything, and the thing as pure artifice (1966:
sexualized bodies. Nancy Duncan (1996: 139) 281). While Sontag emphasizes the frivolous
notes that gay pride parades, public protests, side of camp, it also has a serious side.
performance art and street theatre as well as Camp may be a means of defiance: a kind of
overtly homosexual behaviour such as kissing refusal to be overwhelmed by unfavourable
in public upset unarticulated norms. Chris odds. It is also a style whereby bodies perform
Brickell (2000) examines the ways in which multiple identities, play various parts, and
public (heterosexual) space is disrupted by assume a variety of roles, both for fun as well
queer bodies in the Auckland HERO Parade. as out of political need.
Visually, gay pride marching teams may be The need to be camp may come from cities
considered as camp responses to the polariz- that are inscribed with intense heterosexual
ation of appearance and reality, of stereotypes rigidity. Sally Munt (1995: 115) notes: As
and lived experiences and thereby derive its I became a victim to, rather than a perpetrator
humour from these opposites. Susan Sontag of, the gaze, my fantasies of lesbian mobili-
writes that camp is a sensibility that, among ty/eroticism return to haunt me. Rewriting
other things, converts the serious into the herself as a (lesbian) flanuer Munt (1995)
frivolous (1966: 276) and one that is alive to challenges the disembodied and masculinist
a double sense, in which things can be taken construction of flanuer which is evident
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36 Lynda Johnston

in postmodern accounts of gazing tourists of pride, were feelings of shame. Shame always
(see also Jokinen and Veijola (1997) who offer plays on that doubleness of the public and the
subversive embodied constructions of the private, the extraordinary and the mundane.
flanuer). Munt argues that in the urban It is perhaps the most intimate of feelings but
landscape: seemingly must be brought into being by an
intimate proximity to others (Probyn 2004:
even the protected zones are folding, and yet there 330 331). The spatial context for these
are pockets of resistance which pierce the citys feelingsEdinburghis examined next.
metaphoric paralysis with parody: Gay Pride is one
such representation, fifty thousand homosexuals
parading through the city streets, of every type, Spatializing pride/shame
presenting the Other of heterosexuality, from Gay
Bankers to the Gay Mens Chorus singing Its Edinburgh is a city with a famous inter-
Raining Men, a carnival image of space being national tourist reputation due to vast
permeated by its antithesis. (1995: 123) amounts of city promotion based on cultural
events and festivals.3 Pride Scotland, however,
The drumming groups Pride Scotland per- remains marginal to city tourism promotion.
formance might be understood using theoreti- Marginality tends to structure most gay pride
cal notions of camp. Camp contains an parades and indeed, may be a primary political
explicit commentary on feats of survival in a reason for parades. It may also be the reason
world dominated by the taste, interest and for whyas queer drummers leading the
definitions of others (Sontag 1983: 144). paradewe felt both excited and nervous.
Camp performance has the potential to Our marginal bodies were on display in a city
undermine that which is taken for granted that has been constructed as conservative
and assumed as natural. The excessive when it comes to matters of sexuality. We knew
performance of masculinity and femininity that our bodies represented a challenge to
within homosexual frames exposes not only Edinburghs heteronormalcy. Here I wish to
the fabricated nature of heterosexuality but further Sedgwicks (1993) ideas about shame
also its claim to originality and naturalness as affect and apply them, not only to bodies,
(Bell, Binnie, Cream and Valentine 1994: 33). but to spaces as well.
In frocks, sparkly outfits and Xena-like Shame both disrupts and makes identifi-
iconic costumes, the drumming group waited cation. Shame and subjectivity is a dynamic
for Pride Scotland to start. We knew that we relationship at once deconstructing and
were near the front of the parade which meant foundational, because shame is both peculiarly
we were first to face the peopletourists and contagious and peculiarly individuating
localsof Edinburghs main streets. Excite- (Sedgwick 2003: 36). In thinking about
ment and nervousness infiltrated our shame and space, there are several sexualized
group more so than at any other gig we and shameful incidents in Edinburgh that helps
would perform at. We were performing to have differentiate, and individualize, it as a city.
fun, to play loud and to be proud, at the same The city of Edinburgh, as Lawrence
time we were uncertain about how the Knopp (1998: 159), observes has produced
crowd might react. Our public subjectivities strong resistances to gay male visibility and
were at stake and niggling at our feelings power. Historically, city policies on urban
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Mobilising pride/shame 37

development have favoured Edinburghs same time as their identification challenged


middle-class through the preservation of the heteronormalcy. The scandal highlights
citys core (the Old Town) and surrounding some dominant discourses which construct
neighbourhoods. Edinburgh tends to be sexualized and shamed spaces and bodies of
recognized as a more middle-class and Edinburgh.
conservative city than, for example, Glasgow. Newspapers can also provoke shameful
Edinburgh has a strong and symbolic Scottish affects through silences, as one of the
identity, being the centre for the Scottish participants of this study noted. A lone article
Parliament and the Scottish legal system. This that did appear on Pride Scotland was deemed
is important context to a particular conflict to be offensive.
that occurred in the late 1980s and early 1990s
involving a sex scandal focused on the Scottish Stella: The impression that I get is that over the
judiciary. years the media coverage [of Pride Scotland] is
virtually non-existent. I mean, I certainly, in the
The local tabloid and mainstream press, in Sunday paper, Ive only ever seen one article, which
cooperation with certain local police officers, was offensive, in Scotland on Sunday which
circulated reports alleging that the legal profession I actually wrote a letter in about because that was
in Scotland (including the Scottish judiciary) had the only coverage on the Pride march, and it was all
been infiltrated at its highest levels by a magic just so homophobic, and I just wrote and said what
circle of gay lawyers and judges who were is this all about, whatre you talking about? you
conspiring to pervert justice. (Knopp 1998: 160) know, and they printed my letter actually, which
was great. (Individual interview, 9 July 2001)
Sex crimes, mortgage and housing allowance
fraud were some of the alleged offences. Stellas reaction to the local newspaper might
Knopp (1998) notes that after many years of be understood as a productive affect of shame.
investigation the allegations were found to be Michael Warner (1999: 3) notes, in The
baseless, however, a particular scandalous Trouble with Normal that we need to
discourseand I would argue a shameful develop an ethical response to the problem
affectremained that threatened the estab- of shame . . . The difficult question is not: how
lished Scottish identity of Edinburgh and the do we get rid of our sexual shame? . . . The
sanctity of the legal system. question, rather is this: what will we do with
There are several points to be made from our shame?. Pride events have a history of
this example. It highlights the powerful ways shame that is both productive and corrosive of
in which discourse constructs material places. queer identity. Stellas letter to the local
During the scandal press invoked metaphors newspaper is just one way in which shame
of movement and penetration and specific sites can be creatively productive.
were identified as where sex crimes allegedly It is worth noting that each year Pride
took place. Knopp (1998) notes that gay bars Scotland alternates between Edinburgh and
and clubs, hostels, bed and breakfast lodgings, Glasgow. One of the participants noted the
and cruising grounds such as the road in front difference that the city makes to her:
of the Scottish Office, became publicized
geographies of sexual subversion in Edin- Moira: You know how I was dressed up in a wig
burgh. These became spaces of shame at the and everything? And I was goin out to meet ya, well
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38 Lynda Johnston

when I went out to meet you, I felt soooo exposed as queer space at the same time space becomes
and such a minority. I never felt like that in Glasgow subject to shame. Contradictory feelings of
walkin in the streets like that, going to Pride . . . pride/shame continued to structure the experi-
Theres much more of a celebration feeling or ence of the drumming girls.
warmth, a warmth towards it. In Edinburgh I felt Moira and the band drummed for over an
much more antagonist energy. (First Edinburgh hour at Pride Scotland. The atmosphere was
focus group, 2 July 2001, emphasis in original) fun and we were smiling and laughing when
we walked up and along the Mound then
Here Moria constructs Edinburgh as cold and down beside the National Gallery of Scotland.
antagonistic. She does not feel welcome, When we turned into Princes Streetthe main
rather, she expresses feelings of marginality shopping street of Edinburghwe faced
and Othering. It maybe that Moira experi- people lined up behind the event barriers and
ences shame in Edinburgh, in ways that she were confronted with people with blank
experiences something quite different in expressions (see Figure 2).
Glasgow. Shame attaches to and sharpens The leader of our drumming band explains:
the sense of what one is (Sedgwick 2003: 37)
and, I argue, what space becomes. Being Moira: I was terrified when we turned around to go
out and extrovert may produce Edinburgh down the hill to go on to Princes Street. I was, and

Figure 2 Princes Street, Edinburgh. Source: authors own collection.


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Mobilising pride/shame 39

of course we were in a group, we were in the front, People on Princes Street, therefore, may have
but I found it really like oh my god, what kind found themselves as spectators to an event that
of reaction are we going to get here from these most, it seems, did not plan to be at. Before the
people? parade began they may have been shopping.
Lynda: I can just remember when we turned into Many would have been tourists visiting the
Princes Street and those faces were just looking at city as this was summertime in Edinburgh.
us. (First Edinburgh focus group, 2 July 2001, Some may have thought that Pride was a
emphasis in original) forerunner to Edinburghs festival season.
In recent years the commodification of Pride
My interaction in the focus group does not has meant that these eventssuch as Sydney
explain fully my anxieties. Like Moira I was Mardi Gras, Manchesters Mardi Gras,
terrified when we faced our spectators on London Pridehave become staged carnival-
Princes Street. We had been playing well, with type performances for large numbers of queer
some ease and plenty of laughter, up until and straight tourists. Many of the participants
Princes Street when it became difficult to in this research commented that spectators
keep beat and to follow our drum leader. It was did not look like they were having fun. Kate
at this point in our participation in pride when elaborates:
shame started to underscore our performance.
Shame is profoundly visual (Ash 2005: 512). Kate: I thought it was a really strange going down
We experienced a sudden unfamiliarity on Princes Street because there were so many people
Princes Street. Our smiles were not returned by there that were so passive about what was
those watching us. It was a space Tomkins happening. I dont know if it was because they
(1995: 135) might describe where one wishes were [bored] tourists and they were just sort of oh a
to look or commune with another person but spectacle, like they didnt even seem to register
suddenly cannot because he is strange or necessarily what was going on. (Second Edinburgh
because one expected him to be familiar but he focus group, 9 July 2001, emphasis in original)
suddenly appears unfamiliar, or one started to
smile but found one smiling at a stranger. The resultant passive performance of tourists
when faced with our drumming group and
other Pride performances on Princes Street
Susan: I [was] actually amazed that there was as threaten a sense of well-being that is the main
many people there were given the amount of aim of parade tourismto have fun, to be
publicity there had been. (Karen: Thats true) So proud, to let go, to party. The faces that we
obviously the publicity was all kind of internal, in a looked at did not reflect back our excitement
sense. So the public interface was, to me, almost or feelings of pride.
accidental. Returning to Sedgwicks (2003) work again,
Megan: I asked lots of people if they were coming to she notes that theorists and psychologists
it and they went Oh, I didnt even know about it. locate the beginning of shame in infants.
So if you were sort of interested, or you were a A shame response is produced the moment the
lesbian but didnt go to the gay venues, you adult face fails to, or refuses to, play its part in
wouldnt know about it. Nobody knew about it at the continuation of mutual gaze with the
all. (First Edinburgh focus group, 2 July 2001, infant (Sedgwick 2003: 36). The shame affect
emphasis in original) represents the failure or absence of the smile
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40 Lynda Johnston

of contact and may indicate social isolation. blowing kisses to queer parading women but
When our spectators did not return our smiles shows disgust when her kiss is reciprocated by
a disruptive moment was brought into being. Kate. It is worth thinking about this brief
As queer women drummers in Pride Scot- exchange as a moment of implied consensus
land our shame response was not to hang our between the paraders and the spectator, as
heads and avert our eyes from tourists that Sedgwick (2003: 69) notes a consensus of the
lined the street. We did, however, focus hard eyes of others. Kate felt pride as she
on our drumming in order to get us through reciprocated kisses to the woman on the bus,
Princes Street and past passive tourist gazes. but shame was immediately invoked when the
With our heads upright and our eyes centred spectator showed disgust and refused to accept
on our leader we remembered that this Kates kisses. Once shame has been activated,
celebration of difference was also about the original excitement or joy may be
contesting notions of (in)equality and oppres- increased again and inhibit the shame or the
sion. We attempted to resist imperatives of shame may further inhibit and reduce excite-
shame through prideful affects. ment and joy (Tomkins 1995: 135). Rather
The continual negotiation of this mobile than turning away from disgust shown by
pride/shame landscape informs the third and some spectators, Kate, Erin and Shonagh
final part of the paper. continued to mobilize affects of pride and
shame during Pride Scotland.
Negotiating pride/shame The collectivity of performing in Pride
helped Stella celebrate her sexuality at the
In a focus group interview, Kate begins a same time as she tried to hide her identity.
discussion on some tourists reactions to Pride Wearing sunglasses helps maintain anonymity
Scotland. in spaces where Stella might be recognized.

Kate: So we were waving at this woman. Sometimes


people would ignore you and sometimes they Stella: You know its like the first time I went [to
wouldnt, right? But there were some younger Pride London] I was so panicked that I was going to
people on a bus and they were being really rude. be on the telly and cause I told my mum I was going
Shonagh: Yeah. They were giving that sign, basically. shopping in London, you know, and I mean
Yeah. It just looked like younger people were just I obviously still never tell her where Im going or
basically saying fuck off. whatever.
Kate: And I think that on that same bus was that Lynda: Do you not?
older woman? Stella: No and when I went in Pride Scotland in
Shonagh: Yeah . . . she was blowing us a kiss. And Glasgow I had to go with sunglasses on because
then when you blew a kiss and I copied you . . . and we passed my dads office, which is you know like
she went oooo like that. pretty grim really. (Individual interview, 9 July
Erin: She had a really disgusted look on her face. 2001)
(Second Edinburgh focus group, 9 July 2001,
emphasis in original) Stellas example highlights an ironic strategy
of (in)visibility. While she is out to her parents,
This exchange points to the mobility of pride the risk of being recognized by her parents,
and shame affects. A spectator enjoyed or people who know her family, may result
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Mobilising pride/shame 41

in family disapproval. Her desire to be resolute about her role in Pride when it is held
involved in Pride events, however, brings into on home ground in Glasgow.
tension the dynamics of pride and shame.
As Munt (1998: 25) notes: pride is predicated Stella: It is really important for local, for everyone
on thesometimes consciousdenial of its to have their own kind of celebration or whatever.
own ostracized corollary, shame. Um I guess it makes me a bit more vulnerable as
Stella expresses more about the relationship well because you know Im a bit [less] anonymous,
with her parents. because I know loads of people who could walk
through the streets and not meet anyone that they
Stella: I came out seven and a half years ago you know, but definitely in Glasgow I am much more
know. Theres just no going anywhere with that exposed, you know. (Individual interview, 9 July
really with my mum and pop. So we dont talk about 2001)
[it] and I dont, I hate talking about it and my mum
certainly isnt into it and weve had an argument once Stella negotiates the performance of pride
about it. She said why do you feel the need to (a) tell and shame both publicly and privately.
everyone and (b) walk down the street? Her exact In doing so she indicates that there are
words were that youve got the exact same rights as multiple and ambiguous roles for queer
everyone else, you know, dont shove it down their women. She mobilizes affects of struggle, re-
throats sort of thing. And thats a few years ago and appropriation and achievement and is reso-
I dont know whether shes changed her stance on lute in her commitment to Pride Scotland.
that or not. I mean my mum says that if I get beaten She recognizes that shame produces a
up its my fault for telling people about it, rather than shattered self and that the effort expended
their fault. (Individual interview, 9 July 2001) in the maintenance of her queer self can never
be totally relaxed even during her partici-
Some points can be made about the isolating pation in Pride. Put simply, attention to pride
affects of shame. Shame appears to construct and shame may allow new insights into the
and isolate Stellas identity through an normalizing categorizations of bodies, spaces
affective connection to the shaming of another, and tourism.
as Sedgwick explains:

One of the strangest features of shame (but, I would Conclusions


argue, the most theoretically significant) is the way
bad treatment of someone else, bad treatment This paper responds to the call to consider
by someone else, someone elses embarrassment, lesbians and tourism (Puar 2002a). A growing
stigma, debility, blame or pain, seemingly having body of literature exists on queer tourism,
nothing to do with me, can so readily flood me however, very little has been published on
assuming that Im a shame-prone personwith this lesbians and tourism. The performative tour-
sensation whose very suffusiveness seems to ism space of Pride Scotland 2001 provides
delineate my precise, individual out-lines in the a window from which to investigate queer
most isolating way imaginable. (1993: 14) womens geographies. Drawing on theoretical
notions of shame as affect (Probyn 2004;
Despite Stellas parents attempts to isolate her Sedgwick 2003; Tomkins 1995) I have high-
(through their bad treatment), Stella remains lighted the ways in which shame is uniquely
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42 Lynda Johnston

productive in that it brings the subject into oscillate for the drumming group. Rather
being at the same time as the subject is than merely turning inward as a response
isolated. Focusing on shames demonstrative to shame, queer women drummers draw on
character I consider what queer drummers do camp sensibilities in order to challenge
with their/our shame. heteronormative understandings of bodies
Sedgwicks (2003) ideas on shame and and spaces. Interactions between paraders
subjectivity are extended to the discursive and spectators may produce ambivalent
space of Edinburgh. Previous research and city tourist spaces where affects of pride and
newspaper articles indicate that Edinburgh is shame are realized. Gendered and sexualized
constructed as a conservative and middle-class transgressions are regularly punished and
city. Knopp (1998) shows that homosexuality power relations that inscribe bodies and
is made scandalous in Edinburgh newspapers tourist spaces can be hurtful and shaming.
by the textual creation of abject male bodies Diverse strategies are employed by queer
and sex sites. Knopp (1998) contends that women in Pride, such as using humour,
impossible sexualized positions that circulate exaggerated play of femininities and masculi-
in the media contribute to the making of a nities, and being present/absent by hiding
conservative city. It is somewhat ironic that ones personal identity.
Edinburgh is a famous and major tourist This paper has focused on a small group
destination with numerous festivals held in of queer women (including myself) that
summer but it still resists carnivalesque-type attended and performed in Pride Scotland
celebrations of sexualities, such as Pride 2001. By providing an account of queer
Scotland. Pride Scotland remains the citys womens tourism performances I hope I have
Other festival event. prompted others to think through the
As a result of the lack of Pride promotion by embodied affects of pride/shame in queered
Edinburgh city and Pride officials, tourists find tourist spaces.
themselves at an event that they, for the most
part, had no intention of being part of.
A popular tourist destinationEdinburghs Acknowledgements
Princes Streetis bounded and spatially
regulated by the placing of crowd control A big thank you to the women of the
barriers. Spectators that wait for and watch Edinburgh drumming group for taking part
Pride Scotland on Edinburghs Princes Street and being excited about this research (and for
refuse to return a celebratory gaze to the queer not growling when I missed the beat!). My
women drummers. A pride/shame tension is supportive colleaguesAmanda Banks,
created that brings subjectivities into being, at Kathryn Besio and Robyn Longhurstoffered
the same time it isolates. Shame is equally and useful suggestions and insights that helped
simultaneously identity defining and identity strengthen the paper. This paper was first
erasing. At these moments, queer women presented at the 30th Congress of the IGU,
drummers creatively and collectively negotiate Glasgow, 15 20 August 2004 and an earlier
shameful affects. version appears in Johnston (2005). Com-
The construction of queer drumming bodies ments by Michael Brown and Kath Browne
relies on the mobility of binaries such as were extremely helpful, as were the referee
pride/shame. Feelings of pride and shame reports. Thank you.
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Mobilising pride/shame 43

Notes Johnston, L. (2002) Borderline bodies at gay pride


parades, in Bondi, L., Avis, H., Bingley, A., Davidson,
1 Some of which can be seen at ,http://www.users.zetnet. J., Duffy, R., Einagel, V., Green, A-M., Johnston, L.,
co.uk/mally/samba/bands/scotland/scotland.htm . . Lilley, S., Listerborn, C., Marshy, M., McEwan, S.,
2 Pseudonyms have been used for participants. OConnor, N., Rose, G., Vivat, B. and Wood, N. (eds)
3 , See www.edinburghfestivals.com . . Subjectivities, Knowledges and Feminist Geographies.
The Subjects and Ethics of Social Research. Lanham,
MD: Rowman and Littlefield, pp. 7589.
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and the Ethics of Queer Life. New York: Free Press.
Movilizando el orgullo/la verguenza: lesbianas, el
turismo y los desfiles
Abstract translations
Este artculo recurre a material emprico del Pride
Mobiliser la fierte/la honte: les lesbiennes, le Scotland (Orgullo Gay Escocia) para examinar la
tourisme et les defiles construccion y realizacion de las geografas del
turismo lesbico. Experiencia personal se combina
Cet article sappuie sur des donnees empiriques con material de grupos de sondeo y entrevistas
obtenues du Pride Scotland pour etudier la individuales para esclarecer la poltica de sub-
construction et la performance des aspects geogra- jetividades, desfiles y el turismo urbano. Se recurre
phiques du tourisme lesbien. Des experiences a la teora queer para sugerir que los espacios de
personnelles sajoutent aux materiaux recueillis a` turismo de Pride Scotland proveen sitios impor-
laide dentretiens aupre`s de groupes de discussion tantes donde se puede examinar la co-construc-
et dindividus afin de mettre en lumie`re les cion del orgullo y la verguenza de las participantes
politiques concernant les subjectivites, les defiles lesbicas de los desfiles. Dentro de estos sitios las
et le tourisme urbain. Des theories queer servent a` celebraciones del orgullo se ven subrayados por
etayer largument selon lequel les espaces touris- nociones de verguenza. La poltica de orgullo/
tiques du Pride Scotland constituent des sites verguenza puede ser provechosa y se vive a traves
importants pour letude de la co-construction de de cuerpos generizados y sexualizados. Primero,
la fierte et de la honte chez les participantes au defile ubico esta investigacion dentro de la literatura de
de lesbiennes. Des notions de honte accompagnent turismo que exige el estudio de las geografas
les celebrations de la fierte qui se deroulent sur ces lesbicas. Segundo, el artculo ofrece una descrip-
sites. Il est possible que les politiques concernant la cion de un grupo particular de Edinburgoun
fierte/la honte soient fecondes et vecues a` travers des grupo femenino de percusion que toca en los
corps qui sont a` la fois differencies selon le genre desfiles de Pride. Estas participantes optan por
et sexualises. Dans un premier temps, je situe cette representar sus subjetividades en maneras que
recherche dans le cadre de la litterature sur le ellas entienden constituyen un desafo a la
tourisme qui justifie que lon se penche sur les heteronormalidad. En tercer lugar, se discute las
geographies lesbiennes. Cet article decrit par la suite construcciones discursivas de Edinburgo como
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Mobilising pride/shame 45

ciudad generizada y sexualizada con relacion a modo pretendo explorar las relaciones entre la
Pride Scotland. Sugiero que Pride en Edinburgo performatividad de orgullo/verguenza, genero,
se basa en nociones de verguenza sexualizada. sexualidad y la poltica de resistencia.
Finalmente examino como las mujeres queer
superan las reacciones hostiles y/o indiferentes Palabras claves: orgullo, verguenza, lesbiana,
hacia sus representaciones corporales. De este turismo, queer, performatividad.

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