Camille Whisenant

OPTION D: PARENTS, PEERS & GENDER ROLES

How did your parents influence the development of your gender role? In what ways did
you model yourself after your same gender parent? In what ways are your conceptions
of appropriate gender roles similar to or different from those of your parents? During high
school, what influences did your peers have on your gender role development? How
important were your boyfriends or girlfriends in developing your sense of yourself as a
woman or man? Who are the people who most influence your gender-role concepts
today? As a parent, what gender roles will you model for your children?

When I was younger, my friends and I felt that we could sort

ourselves (and other girls) into two neat categories: girly-girls and
tomboys. I remember one friend, who played soccer with the boys at
recess but also wore a bow in her hair every day, declaring that she
was more of a mix of tomboy and girly-girl. To my seven year-old
brain, this idea of a less black and white view of gender seemed quite
foreign. However, as I have grown older, I have come to have a better
understanding of gender, and the role family and society play in
shaping it. This makes sense, because according to the textbook, our
understanding of what it means to be a male or female likely changes
as we age and varies some from person to person and/or from one
group to another. (Strong & Cohen, 2014, p. 111)

From around the ages of three to six, or until I realized that I was
afraid of blood, I wanted to be a pediatrician when I grew up. Then
during my mid elementary school years, I wanted to be a mom when I
grew up. I think that this worried my mother, a stay-at-home mom
herself, because she launched off on a mission to find an actual career
for me to proclaim as my dream. My family is pretty traditional in a lot
of ways- I grew up with a dad who went to work every day, and a mom
who stayed home with my little brother and me. Most of my friends
also had stay-at-home moms. However, I understood from a young age
that my mom had also gone to college, had a masters degree in social
work, and used to be a school counselor. I knew that women could be
anything they wanted to be, but I think that I thought of a career as
something to do just until one became a mother.

My paternal grandmother, my Grandma Mary Jane, is one of my

biggest role models. She was a teacher when her kids were young, but
then left teaching to be a stay-at-home mom. After raising seven kids,
she returned to school and became a lawyer. She has now retired, but
she still works as a moderator several times a month. My grandma
amazes me because though she is 54, gentle and unassuming, she is
also very sharp, intelligent, and brave. She has taught me many things
about baking, but also has made me want to go to law school.
 One interesting part of growing up in a fairly conservative
religious community is that I have sat in many church lessons on
preparing to become a wife and mother. While I hope to someday get
married and have kids, I hate it when I hear other girls my age, and
even my friends, saying things like I am just going to marry rich or I
cant wait to get married and never work again. I am also distraught
by statistics showing that many women in Utah do not finish college
because they get married. I am grateful that my mom, who recognizes
the joy and value of motherhood, pushed me to set educational goals
of my own. I am grateful for a family, and for two extended families,
who have taught me the importance of education and self reliance.

I am still a teenager, and I like most teenagers, I am heavily

influenced by my peers, and by the world around me. Social media has
a large influence on the way I view the world. As I navigate between
the things I read online, the opinions I hear at school, the comments
my family makes, the teachings I hear at church, and the
conversations I have with my friends, it is sometimes confusing to
figure out what I believe as an individual. However, I am grateful that
there is such a wide array of information at my fingertips, so that I can
know that my views are really that- mine, and not something being
force-fed to me. I anticipate that my views on gender, and on the
world, will continue to change and evolve for the rest of my life.

SOURCES:
Strong, B, & Cohen, T. F. (2014). The marriage and family experience:
Intimate relationships in a changing society (12th ed.). Belmont, CA:
Wadsworth.