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Directions: Read both sample essays and offer feedback to each writer. Then, use the grading rubric on
the last page to assign a numerical score to each essay. Be prepared to share your thinking!
Prompt for both essays: Does technology improve the quality of life for a society? How? Why? If
not, why not?
Both spectacular and brilliant, electrical currents and their magic entertained the minds of many
who watched in awe. There was no conception of electric fans or electric ovens prior to the 1800s, but
there was, of course, a new entertainment. Physicists would use their knowledge of electromagnetism to
control electric currents, putting on a show for those who had just heard about the discovery. Years later,
that same current would become an inspiration for both the industrial and technological world of of the
present. Considering the significant impact electricity has had on society today, technology has had
tremendous advances in years prior to the discovery and still does so today. Technology, as a creation and
production of man, improves the quality of life for a society if and only the circumstances allow it to do
so.
Since the dawn of civilization, humans have brought forth ideas and inventions that have satisfied
their survival. Using both their bodies and the resources provided by the natural world, humans have
been able to use both for the advancement of cities and civilizations. They used technology as a means
for survival, constantly depending on their carriages to carry food or fire to heat their homes. Certainly,
technology assisted with their advancement and quite interestingly, paved way for economic systems to
arise. Production and trade had made their way into the lives of farmers and builders, creating a circle of
trade that allowed for population to increase. As millenniums past, the human species would have already
Entering a new age in the early 1800s, man began to incorporate machines into production. A new
term of mass production called for an enlargement of goods to be produced, challenging the hands of
workers. Machines were needed for mass production, therefore the Industrial Age began. New
inventions lead to new cities, while other inventions lead to new scientific discoveries. And a few
hundred years later, the Internet would be born, along with a multitude of smartphones.
Times change and call for a different use of available resources and technology. In the novel Brave
New World, a new society has unraveled and has incorporated technology into biological fundamentals:
reproduction. Technology has now, in turn, controlled the very aspect of lifes origin. It has taken away
the liberty of free thinking, filling the minds of children, such as those affected by Hypnopaedia, to think
of themselves differently. In the real world today, technology has accomplished many great things, but as
humans slowly let technology take control, there is a s shift in the way humans live. Even the simplest
From a need of survival to the call of mass productions, technology has depended on the needs of the
society involved. In Brave New World technology tried to accomplish establishing stability and
happiness, but ended up replacing other values through its excessive control of the human person. Based
on the conditions called upon, technology resembles the same want by society, and can, in most cases,
Technology is part of today. As our society grows, the need for more sophisticated
technology also grows. In Brave New World, written by Aldous Huxley, technology also plays
a big part. In Brave New World it can be seen that society is suffering due to technology. In
todays world, it can be seen that society is faltering due to technology. I feel that technology
gets in the way of a fully functioning society and makes it hard to live right.
In Brave New World, Aldous Huxley explains technology. One change is the birthing
process. The government openly reproduces human beings by using a factory line model. This
does not allow for mothers and fathers to procreate so families are not allowed. Also, the babies
are genetically modified through limited oxygen and special conditioning while decanting so that
they are born into a particular caste. The government controls the abilities the babies will have.
This makes the society very predictable but also contingent on the scientific process working
every time.
Technology in the real world also threatens to harm society. With the scientific advances
such as nuclear bombs or drones or internet black hats, society is again put at risk. These
advancements in technology have harmed quality of life in society because now the people are
afraid. When technological advances such as these are made, there is conflict. In this case,
technology doesn't help society, it ruins it. The reason why our society is ruined is because we
retained our awareness of the dangers of too much science, whereas in the book the citizens were
Score of 4
Score of 3
Score of 2
Demonstrates little or no cohesion and limited skill in the use and control of language.
May lack a clear central claim or controlling idea or may deviate from the claim or idea over the
course of the response.
May include an ineffective introduction and/or conclusion. The response may demonstrate some
progression of ideas within paragraphs but not throughout the response.
Has limited variety in sentence structures; sentence structures may be repetitive.
Demonstrates general or vague word choice; word choice may be repetitive. The response may
deviate noticeably from a formal style and objective tone.
Shows a limited control of the conventions of standard written English and contains errors that
detract from the quality of writing and may impede understanding.
Score of 1
Demonstrates little or no cohesion and inadequate skill in the use and control of language.
May lack a clear central claim or controlling idea.
Lacks a recognizable introduction and conclusion. The response does not have a discernible
progression of ideas.
Lacks variety in sentence structures; sentence structures may be repetitive. The response
demonstrates general and vague word choice; word choice may be poor or inaccurate. The response
may lack a formal style and objective tone.
Shows a weak control of the conventions of standard written English and may contain numerous
errors that undermine the quality of writing.