EMILY FRAUEN Our Barbies, Ourselves < topless Barbie's world and ing pools itl girls thoughout America should know that Barbie isnot dra tase Tn this tongue-in-cheek esiy onthe role Barc has played in oO Fer life, Emily Prager (&. 1952) reveals the damnaging effet of a doll that establishes such an impossible standard of plrysical perfcion for Iie girts—and for litle boys who grow up expecting their gifiends 10 Took like Barbie. When not contemplating what Barbie has done to her, Emily Prager is an essayist and fiction writer who has published for ‘The National Lampoon, The Village Voice, ad Penthoute, | among other magazines, Her books include a work of historia ftom Jor dildren, World War 11 Resistance Stories; ¢ book of fiumor, ‘The Official | Hate Videogames Handbook; and works of faion such as Eve's Tattoo (1991) aud Clea and Zeus Divorce (1987). the mind of the 323 ale 332 aad 332 fst E33 f24 dicate that soinehow his equipment, his ce all rapped sre mote mysterious than hers? Did the : ity and its possible damage to read an astounding obituary in the New York Times not too long ago. [t concemed the death of one Jack Ryan. A former husband of Zsa Zsa Gabor, it ssid, Mr. Ryan had been an inventor and designer during = 2 S 3 3 ive years later, movies and videos are any was obte object. How do they think I felt, knowing that no hy was his treated as if it wei ct that it was treated as suc ‘water beds they slept in, or hot tubs they romped i women and covered men. As if we' 5 g £E < his lifetime. A man of eclectic creativity, he designed Sparrow and Hawk 3 £8 missiles when he worked for the Raytheon Company, and, the notice Bek, 32 said, when he consulted for Mattel he designed Barbie. aos SES84 Barbie was designed by a man, suddenly a lot of things made sense” i‘. 522° come, things I'd wondered about for years. I used to look at Barbie and 825: 258 & wonder, What's wrong with this picture? What kind of woman designed this doll? Lets be honest: Barbie looks like someone who got her stat at the Playboy Mansion. She could be a regular guest on The Howani Stent Show. ft is a fact of Barbie's design that her breasts are so out of proportion to the rest of her body that if she were a human woman, she'd fall Rat on her face. If'its true thet a woman didn’t design Barbie, you dont know how much saner that makes me feel. Of course, that doesn’ ameliorate the damage. There are millions of women who are subliminally sure that 2 ‘hirty-nine-inch bust and a twenty-three-inch waist are the epitome of lovability. Could this account for the popularity of breast implant sur gery? T don't mean to step on anyone's toes here. I loved my Barbi. Secretly, [stil believe that neon pink and turquoise blue are the only colors in which to decorate a duplex condo, And like many others of my generation, I've never married, simply because I cannot find a man who looks as good in clam diggers ss Ken. ‘The question that comes to mind is, of course, Did Mr. Ryan design Barbie as 2 weapon? Because it is odd that Barbie appeared about the same time in my consciousness as the feminist movement—a time when women sought equality and small breasts were king, Oris Barbie the dream date of weapons designers? Or perhaps its simpler chan that: Perhaps Barbie is Zsa Zsa ifshe were eleven inches tall. No matter what, my discovery of Jack Ryan confirms what I have always felt: There is something indescnbably masculine zbout Barbie—dare I say it, phallic. For all her giant breasts and high-heeled feet, she lacks a certain softness. IE you asked 2 litle girl what kind of doll she wanted for Christmas, | Just don' think sheid reply, "Please, Santa, I want a hard-body.” (On the other hand, you could say that Barbie, in feminist terms, i= definitely her own person. With her condos and fishion plazas and pools and beauty salons, she is definitely «liberated woman, 2 gal on the move. ‘And she has always been sexual, even totemic. Before Barbie, American dolls were flatfooted and breastiess, and ineffably dignified. They were created in che image of lite girls or babies. Madame Alexander was the gueen of doll makers in the fifties, and her dollies looked like Elizabeck Taylor in National Velvet. They represented the kind of gils who looked perfect in jodhpurs, whose hair was never out of place, who grew up to. 1 w {o fo — med to vast popu- fin colors, Her dolls’ boyfiiends d that ominous. 1 ¢ humongous breasts, and that was OK fgmenis who could keep ays felt weird abow & 5 2 2 3 i $ : figments with large portfolios and id perhaps what accounts for Bai anents of the inagi iece suite and presidential aspirat of Barbie, is that she was also a sixties woman: into free love and ss, and possessed of real, molded boyfriend, Ken, with wh Jackie Kennedy—before she martied Onassi