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New Report Finds Young People Troubled By

Romantic Relationships and Widespread Sexual
Harassment

BY NEWS EDITOR (/TAXONOMY/TERM/2761) ON MAY 16, 2017 11:50 AM

Adults fret about youth and the hook-up culture, but commonly neglect two more pervasive
problems in young peoples lives.

A new report (https://mcc.gse.harvard.edu/thetalk)released today suggests that many young people struggle with developing healthy romantic
relationships and that rates of misogyny and sexual harassment among teens and young adults are alarmingly high. The report also suggests
that, while many adults are focused on the youth hook-up culture, they commonly ignore or fail to address these two more pervasive
problems. Titled The Talk: How Adults Can Promote Young Peoples Healthy Relationships and Prevent Misogyny and Sexual Harassment
(https://mcc.gse.harvard.edu/thetalk), the report was published by Making Caring Common (makingcaringcommon.org), a project of the
Harvard Graduate School of Education.

We hope that this report is a real wake-up call, said Richard Weissbourd (/node/127492), senior lecturer at the Harvard Graduate School of
Education, faculty director of the Making Caring Common project, and lead author of the study. While adults, and parents in particular, wring
their hands about the hook-up culture, research indicates that far fewer young people are hooking up than is commonly believed. This focus
on the hook-up culture also obscures two much bigger issues that our research suggests many young people are struggling with: forming and
maintaining healthy and ful lling romantic relationships and dealing with widespread misogyny and sexual harassment. Unfortunately, we also
found that most adults appear to be doing very little to address these serious problems.

The report is based on several years of research by Weissbourd and his research team, including surveys of over 3,000 young adults and high
school students nationwide and scores of formal interviews and informal conversations. Weissbourd and his team also spoke with many adults
who are key to young people, including parents, teachers, sport coaches, and counselors. More information about the research methodology
can be found in the full report at www.makingcaringcommon.org (makingcaringcommon.org).

Key Findings
Key ndings from the report include the following:

1. Teens and adults tend to greatly overestimate the size of the hook-up culture and these misconceptions can be detrimental to
young people. Research indicates that a large majority of young people are not hooking up frequently, and our research suggests that
teens and adults tend to greatly overestimate the percentage of young people who are hooking up or having casual sex. This
 overestimation can make many teens and young adults feel embarrassed or ashamed, and can also pressure them to engage in sex when
they are not interested or ready
2. Large numbers of teens and young adults are unprepared for caring, lasting romantic relationships and are anxious about
developing them. Yet it appears that parents, educators and other adults often provide young people with little or no guidance
in developing these relationships. The good news is that a high percentage of young people want this guidance. Seventy percent of
survey respondents (18 to 25-year-olds) reported wishing they had received more information from their parents about some emotional
aspect of romantic relationships, and 65 percent indicated that they wanted guidance on some emotional aspect of romantic relationships
in a health or sex education class at school.
3. Misogyny and sexual harassment appear to be pervasive among young people and certain forms of gender-based degradation
may be increasing, yet a signi cant majority of parents do not appear to be talking to young people about it. In our national
survey of 18 to 25-year-olds, 87 percent of women reported having experienced some form of sexual harassment during their lifetime, yet
76 percent of respondents to this survey had never had a conversation with their parents about how to avoid sexually harassing others.
Majorities of respondents also had never had conversations with their parents about various forms of misogyny.
4. Many young people dont see certain types of gender-based degradation and subordination as problems in our society. Forty-
eight percent of our survey respondents either agreed or were neutral about the idea that society has reached a point that there is no
more double standard against women. Thirty-nine percent of respondents either agreed or were neutral that its rare to see a woman
treated in an inappropriately sexualized manner on television. About 1 in 3 male respondents thought that men should be dominant in
romantic relationships.
5. Research shows that rates of sexual assault among young people are high. But our research suggests that a majority of parents and
educators arent discussing with young people basic issues related to consent. While the report did not focus on consent and sexual
assault, our survey data suggests that many adults are also not talking to young people about these important issues. Most of the
respondents to our survey of 18 to 25-year-olds had never spoken with their parents about being sure your partner wants to have sex
and is comfortable doing so before having sex(61%), assuring your own comfort before engaging in sex (49%), the importance of not
pressuring someone to have sex with you(56%), the importance of not continuing to ask someone to have sex after they have said no
(62%), or the importance of not having sex with someone who is too intoxicated or impaired to make a decision about sex (57%). A large
majority of respondents who had had these conversations with parents described them as at least somewhat in uential.

Recommendations
In light of the report ndings, Making Caring Common developed the following tips for parents and other adults to help guide these important
conversations with young people.

1. Talk about love and help teens understand the di erences between mature love and other forms of intense attraction.
Regardless of their own relationships successes and failures, all adults can distill their wisdom and share it in age-appropriate ways with
teens and young adults. They can also explore with teens and young adults questions at the core of learning how to love and develop
healthy relationships. For example, what is the di erence between infatuation, intoxication and love?
2. Guide young people in identifying healthy and unhealthy relationships. Adults can ask questions that help teens identify the markers
of healthy and unhealthy relationships, and can explore with them examples of each in their own lives and in the media. One important
marker is whether a romantic relationship makes both partners more respectful, compassionate, generative, hopeful.
3. Go beyond platitudes. Important as it is to tell young people to be respectful, many teens dont know what this actually means in
di erent romantic and sexual situations. Adults need to identify for teens common forms of misogyny and harassment, such as catcalling
or using gender-based slurs, and they need to talk to teens speci cally about what respect and care concretely mean in any type of
romantic relationship.
4. Step in. When parents and other adults witness degrading, sexualized words or behavior, its imperative that they intervene. Silence can
be understood as permission. Adults need to talk much more with each other and with school counselors and other experts about what
types of interventions are likely to be e ective and try out various approaches. Its often important in school and community settings to
enlist teens and young people themselves in preventing these behaviors.
5. Talk about what it means to be an ethical person. Helping young people develop the skills to maintain caring romantic relationships
and treat those of di erent genders with dignity and respect can also help strengthen their ability to develop caring, responsible
relationships at every stage of their lives and to grow into ethical adults, community members, and citizens. Its important for adults to
connect discussion with teens and young adults about romantic and sexual relationships and misogyny and harassment to ethical
questions about their obligation to treat others with dignity and respect, intervene when others are at risk of being harmed, and advocate
for those who are vulnerable.

A full-length version of these tips and additional guides and resources for parents, educators, and young people can be found in the full report
at www.makingcaringcommon.org (http://www.makingcaringcommon.org).
In the Press:
ABC News (Good Morning, America) (http://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/harvard-report-millennials-interested-casual-sex/story?id=47447346)
The Washington Post (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2017/05/17/how-to-teach-teens-to-have-healthy-romantic-relationships/?
utm_term=.9e00e404aec5)
WBUR (http://www.wbur.org/radioboston/2017/05/17/harvard-hookup-culture)
NBC News (http://www.nbcnews.com/feature/college-game-plan/teens-don-t-know-enough-about-love-sex-or-misogyny-n760851)
Newsweek (http://www.newsweek.com/sexual-assault-young-people-campus-rape-stanford-sex-education-611028)
Broadly (https://broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/parents-are-failing-miserably-at-talking-to-teens-about-sex)
The Guardian (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/may/18/forget-hookup-culture-the-talk-your-kids-need-is-about-
relationships?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other)
Upworthy (http:// http://www.upworthy.com/ivy-league-researchers-released-a-huge-report-on-teen-sex-its-a-must-read-for-parents)
The Independent (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/sexual-harrassment-us-young-women-90-percent-titled-the-talk-
a7740456.html)

Contact:
Alison Cashin
617.495.1959 (direct line)
617.384.7738 (main o ce)
alison_cashin@gse.harvard.edu (mailto:alison_cashin@gse.harvard.edu)

***

About Making Caring Common

Making Caring Common (MCC), a project of the Harvard Graduate School of Education, helps educators, parents, and communities raise
children who are caring, responsible to their communities, and committed to justice.

Tags: Making Caring Common (/taxonomy/term/38381) romantic relationships

(/taxonomy/term/43761) relationships (/taxonomy/term/32512) sexuality

(/taxonomy/term/43841) high school (/taxonomy/term/15832) harassment

(/taxonomy/term/52421) Richard Weissbourd (/taxonomy/term/15902)

1 Comment Sort by Oldest

Add a comment...

Monika Jeannette
Is there an adult in the room? Regrettably it's on our watch, us adults, that societal 'norms' have plummeted to
their current shockingly crass levels. With unfettered access 24/7 to a pervasive media environment that is
obsessed with violence and the objectification of women and girls, is it surprising that our youth struggle with
forming healthy romantic relationships and knowing how to deal with mysogyny? Thank you MCC for this
important research and for the tips to help guide parents & adults in the conversations we need to have with our
kids.
Like Reply Jun 1, 2017 3:46pm

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