Vazquez 1

Jennifer Vazquez

Student ID: 25143411

Shane Crosby

Course ID: 33100

August 9, 2017

The Evolutionary MermaidsRhetorical Analysis Paper: Final Draft Commented [JV1]: The previous title was very
technical and gave very little to no insight to what
In Daughters of the Springs by Lauren Groff, the author is conveying her message the Rhetorical analysis paper was about.

about a new way to approach the symbol that mermaids pose and communicating through the use

of juxtaposition, diction, tone, and sentence structure that women over time have shown society

that they are so much more than a symbol of tranquility, exterior beauty, and compliance through

the use of juxtaposition, diction, tone, and sentence structure; the effect of this message is its Commented [JV2]: I reworded this clause to
make it flow better and sound more concise.
impact on the mermaids that work at the mermaid show in Weeki Wachee, Florida. The way in Before it went straight to the way the author
communicated without letting know what the
which Groff presents the background knowledge of the symbolism behind the mermaid by, actual message was.

juxtaposing it to the actual endeavor to play one at the show, exemplifies the changes of women

and society and carries out this feminist message. Groff provides imagery of the mermaids at Commented [JV3]: I edited the sentence to a
more accurate and concise statement without
work, using a specific word choice when describing the myth of the mermaids and the actual using redundant transitions.

mermaid actresses. This technique demonstrates to the audience that the writers initial views of

the mermaid actresses being superficial and mainly focused on beauty and having a sexy

image to portray was overrated, and that there is significantly more to the job than what is seen

on the surface.

Groffs juxtaposition of words throughout the essay carries out the message of how men

in history have used the mermaid symbol in weakening women and their true potential, as well

as allowing the reader to see how the mermaid symbol has evolved in society through time. She
 Vazquez 2

expresses her feeling towards how the [myths] of mermaids both explains and distances

women (Groff, 3) and reflects on how women were undermined and misrepresented because

men were the ones with power; hence, women had no way of communicating their opinions say

through writing or spoken word. The myths of sailors many years ago, such as Captain

Blackbeard, and the stories spun by Hans Christian Andersen, used mermaids as a representation

of women during that era. The Captains interpretation of mermaids as [having] vicious Commented [JV4]: I fixed the grammatical/
punctuation error involving a missing comma.
personalities (Fairclough, 2) and bad luck, along with Andersens weak mermaid, both have The deletion of the comma clarified that Captain
Blackbeard is the appositive to the sailors of
the power to cause disorder if they dont follow the social norms and distances the women many years ago. The additional comma at the
end of Christian Andersen provided an extra
from their real image of being strong and nurturing. The writer chose to carry out this message emphasis and structure to the sentence that was
needed to show that it was an addition to the
myths that were told.
through the juxtaposition of the myths explaining and distancing women. This was achieved

because the word explains was used in the context that the myths were a justification to how Commented [JV5]: I edited this clause because
the word the between distances and women
women are in real life while it distances and isolates the true nature of women. The effect of made the sentence sound awkward and didnt
convey the meaning of distance that I wanted.
the juxtaposition of these words enables the audience to see that mermaids hold much more

meaning than what is superficially seen; furthermore, they can see that the mermaid has been a

debilitating symbol of women in society.

In addition, the writer continues to disclose the convey this message of how men Commented [JV6]: I was using the word
convey to many times and decided to freshen
dominated society and were the makers of myths [and] are the victors, the ones allowed the up the paragraph by choosing the word disclose. I
chose the word disclose because it also adds to
leisure and education to write [ for most of human history] (Groff, 3) through the use of diction the massage of trying to expose that in the past
men were the ones who controlled the image
and tone. The message that the author expressed was that for most of history women didnt women posed in society.

have direct access to education, and so their stories could not be told. Men were the only ones

able to write the accounts of what happened, specifically what happened to them. The word

choice she employs when describing the men who wrote such myths of the mermaids as

conquerors goes to show that the men dominated the women. Women who were assertive and
 Vazquez 3

candid would then be described by men as other beings who brought disaster and bad fortune.

The tone the writer expresses shows how she is aggrieved and critical of how men had control of

women. This allows the audience to reflect on the myths and question the validity of what the

mermaid represents.

Furthermore, Groff delivers the pro-women message through the development of certain

sentence structure and, once again, tone. The mermaids at the show in Weeki Wachee were

women that had an easy job where they get to dolphin-kick and smile and make pretty shapes

with their bodies underwater, but the rest of the time its a job (Groff, 23). What the writer is

communicating is that the current image of a mermaid is that they are a symbol for beauty, being

docile and sexy, but, the mermaids are hardworking women who risk their lives every day

when entering the water. The writer carries this message out with an anticlimactic sentence. She

builds up the sentence so that in the beginning she is describing the mermaid actresses as

beautiful and full of grace and that they are there because they want to be, but it is like any other

job where it is difficult and at times risky. The tone switches to critical when telling the audience

that the mermaid actresses are at the place because it is simply a job that they must do. The effect

of this anticlimactic sentence is to show the audience that being a mermaid at Weeki Wachee

isnt only about the presentation but also maintaining their equipment as well and there is

nothing graceful about that.

Moreover, the authors message As stated before, the author anew conveys her message

of an evolved mermaid symbol, shedding a positive light on women, presented using word

choice. Men in society were the ones who could share their experiences and publish their Commented [JV7]: Word choice and getting
rid of the pesky word convey that I have been
thoughts and so men like Hans Christian Anderson were able to portray their own interpretations using throughout the essay without an end was
the edit I did to this sentence. Its time for me to
of the life of a Victorian Woman. The writer, Laura Groff, read the story to be an allegory for start reading the dictionary and build a better
word bank for myself.
 Vazquez 4

the plight of the Victorian woman, who was asked to give up her voice to lure a man to marry

her (Groff, 17). The writer is carrying out the message that ties back to the origins of how

mermaids were portrayed during, the , in times of people like Hans Christian Andersen;, as

defenseless woman whom were powerless and unable to do anything but the only thing they

could do is lure men for marriage. The writer gave this message through the specific words Commented [JV8]: Edit: Word choice to make
things flow clearly. I added extra commentary to
choices to describe the societal image of the Victorian woman in the era of Anderson. The the description of women that lived in the era of
Hans Christian.
women had to sacrifice their voice in society to be an ideal, domestic candidate to lure Commented [JV9]: Edit: Took out words for
clarity and added the phrase societal image of
prospective husbands. The words or phrases such as give up and lure carryies out a wretched the when describing the Victorian Woman. The
phrase societal image of the allows me to detail
and resentful tone that express negative feelings towards this display of women. The words that it isnt a physical description of how the
Victorian looks, but the way they are represented
choice effects the audience pathos inflicting a moment of realization and pity moment towards in society.

what women had to do or be. Commented [JV10]: I edited the verb tense in
the sentence to make the sentence piece together.
As well as In addition to the previous quote, Groff continues to convey the message that I also added moment to the sentence because I
want to emphasize the actual time and feeling that
mermaids were a symbol sign that debilitated women in history and made them the weak ones in realizing something involves.

the story with and had men fighting their battles but in current times women are seen as much

more and stronger. Women are portrayed in as stronger characters, where they can fight for what Commented [JV11]: Again, I corrected my
word choices and provided a word that is direct
they want unlike in the Anderson story of the Little Mermaid, and [to have the Prince] be the and to the point.

one to fight the sea witch takes all the magic out of the story as well as all the little mermaids

ferocious autonomy, booting it headlong into the banal. (Groff, 17). The writers message

through this specific line is that women were again were shown as weak and helpless human

beings whom need the help of man to resolve any problems. The word choice here is amazing Commented [JV12]: I edited the grammar and
placing of certain words I already had there in a
because the writer is conveying that by men always resolving womens problems they were place where it could communicate my message
more clearly.
showing that their women are banal and foolish. The writer describesing how that the act of

the prince fighting the mermaids battle is as incarcerating because he took away the mermaids,
 Vazquez 5

which is a symbol for the women of the era, freedom to defend herself and show that she is

capable of at least protecting herself. The Prince fighting the battle of the mermaid deteriorates Commented [JV13]: Grammar editing to make
the message clear.
the self-image of a mermaid as being strong, and this proves the claim that the writer suggests
Commented [JV14]: The sentence sounded a
bit awkward without the word, as and there was
that these mermaid women are strong and capable of dangerous things. The effect on the a missing comma.

audience is that they can make a connection to theses mermaid actresses in these old pieces of

literature to the mermaid actresses in that by simply working underwater and having to control

their breathing, they have proven themselves to be incredibly courageous and powerful proves

that these mermaids, women, are potent. Commented [JV15]: Re-worded the sentence
so the reader could understand I was referring to
I believe that the author chose to title this essay the Daughters of the Spring because it the mermaids in the pieces of literature.

goes back to how the mermaid show nurtured and helped many young women growing up to

become and independent women and so they will feel as if this place was their mother; hence,

the young women are the Daughters of the Spring. The purpose this title serves is to express the Commented [JV16]: Grammar corrections and
editing of word choices was done to this sentence
feminist message she learned throughout her travel in Weeki Wachee. She talks about the history to elaborate on the independent women.

of the place and you get to know that this was one of the first jobs for women in the area to have

a voice in society no matter how small it was. This place was created in the late 1940s and

womens roles were changing and [they could volunteer] for military service, while twenty

times as many stepped into civilian jobs, including positions previously closed to them

(McEuen, 1); in addition, women were evolving from the compliant, homemaker, and stay at

home wife into athe wife who was entering the workforce, all while this was becoming and it

was accepted acceptable in society. When the audience reads the title for the first time they

might feel a bit befuddled as to what and who the meaning of the springs, and what

daughters are referring to, or the audience might think that there is a family called the Springs

and that the essay will be about their daughters. After reading the travel essay the audience will Commented [JV17]: I fixed the syntax of the
syntax and grammar of the syntax to make the
sentence understandable.
 Vazquez 6

be able to understand the meaning behind the title just as the author was able to understand the

work of the mermaids at the show. The choices the writer made are even more effective than for

their intended purposes because she is expressing her changing view on what the mermaid Commented [JV18]: The addition of those
words allows for emphasis on effectiveness of the
represents. If she were to change any of her techniques she could come off as if she was trying to writer and her purposes.

persuade us into seeing the symbol of the mermaid as she does.

The effect that this piece of travel writing has on an audience depends on the audience

itself. The writer purposefully wrote her essay with a specific audience in mind; an audience that

would be open to new endeavors and new ways of thinking. Thus, the location where her travel

essay was published and the specific magazine it was published in are is useful when analyzing

the effects that her travel essay can have had and can continue to have on the readers. Daughters Commented [JV19]: I fixed verb tenses and
added words that helped with the way the
of the Springs was published on July 21, 2014 in the Southern region of the United States. It sentence sounds. Provided clarity to the sentence.

was published in the 85th Issue of the Oxford American A Magazine of the South. Hence, it can

be obtained that the audience is, though not exclusively, composed of people living in the South,

especially those who enjoy creative writing about southern living and culture. These pieces of

information allow us to note that people in the south are generally conservative and that these

new interpretations of the mermaid being more than a mere sex object or debilitating woman

symbol and that of women, rather a symbol of how women are more powerful than we they let

on, could possibly change the way the audience perceives mermaids. According to Carl Commented [JV20]: The addition of the word
object in front of sex clarifies that I am not
Thompson, author of the Travel Writing, travel writing can [reinforce or discredit the] firm referring to sex as a verb but as an adjective to the
symbol of mermaids. I also edited other words in
sense of differences that pertain between cultures, regions, and ethnicities, and by dealing [with] the sentence so that I could clear up that issue of
women being represented as a sex symbol and
stereotypes, and this is exactly what Groff takes on concerning the image that a mermaid that there are new ways of thinking that improves
the image of women.
portrays and its the associations with women, and expressinges her ways of thinking to the

people in the South. Commented [JV21]: Corrected the grammar

errors that were present.
 Vazquez 7

My response after reading this travel essay was the same as her. I had never thought of

how the mermaid is portrayed to society and just as the writers views and opinions were

changing my view on the mermaids changed as well. It wasnt so much of a persuasion that what

the author was usingdoing , but rather an enlightenment and expressing an original approach to

analyzing the symbol the mermaid posed to enlighten modern readers. In my opinion, the

writers arguments have a well-defined foundation and that allows her to adequatelywell defend

and express her views on the mermaids.

The writers message conveys that women have evolved in society and represent much

more than the image a mermaid represents. The audience at the Weeki Wachee show dont stop Commented [JV22]: I wanted to clarify what I
was saying because it sounded confusing and like
to think that these mermaids show incredible talent in controlling their breath and showing grace mumble- jumble. The deletion of words that
werent providing anything to the sentence helped
while doing so. The immediate thought to the audience is that mermaid symbol they grew up to bring words that could help me get my
message across.
with that includes a provocative dress and a pretty face, nothing more. Groff presents these many

faces of the mermaid symbol using specific word choice when depicting how women were

portrayed before and how they stand out now. Along with diction, the juxtaposition of words and

imagery helps to further detail the true symbol of the mermaid and its true female representation.

The audience of this travel essay are effected by new ways of seeing the portrayal of the

mermaid in both contexts.

 Vazquez 8

Works Cited

Fairclough, Caty. "From Mermaids to Manatees: The Myth and the Reality." Ocean Portal

| Smithsonian. Smithsonian's National Museum of Natural History, 03 Oct. 2016. Web. 21

July 2017. <http://ocean.si.edu/ocean-news/mermaids-manatees-myth-and-reality>. Caty

Fairclough is an incoming senior at Brandeis University double majoring in Environmental

Studies as well as creative writing. She presents information on the mythology of mermaids and

how the mermaid was presented in earlier times. Many portrayals of the mermaids across

different time periods reflected the woman of that era; furthermore, Fairclough shows that as

early as in Homers Odyssey women were a symbol of danger and in Andersons Little Mermaid

women were weak figures. People that would be interested in this article would be interested in

myths and how they came to be.

McEuen, Melissa A. "Women, Gender, and World War II." Oxford Research Encyclopedia

of American History. Oxford University Press, 08 June 2017. Web. 21 July 2017.

<http://americanhistory.oxfordre.com/view/10.1093/acrefore/9780199329175.001.0001/acre

fore-9780199329175-e-55>. Melissa A. McEuen, a history professor at Transylvania

University, wrote the book called Making War, Making Women argues that during World War II

womens lives were drastically changed. McEuen used personal accounts of woman and

government records to expose what society wanted women to be like in the 1940s. The ideal

women had to take care of her image and look composed so they could be taken seriously in the

workforce. People who would read her book can be those who are interested in knowing about

what women endured during WWII. Also, those who are feminists and are interested in

exploring the past and how far women have come.

 Vazquez 9

Thompson, Carl. "Introduction." Introduction. Travel Writing. London: Routledge, 2011.

N. pag. Print. Dr. Carl Thompson, a former member of the Centre for Travel Writing

Studies, is fascinated with travel writing and has a specialty with Romantic literature,

shipwreck narratives, eighteenth and nineteenth-century women travelers. He is currently

an English professor at St. Marys University. Dr. Thompson argues that travel writing

has two purposes: either to reinstate stereotypes and the differences that come along with

cultures and places or to overcome these differences and bring people together and

understand other cultures. He approaches this by explaining both sides two travel writing

and how the author of a travel writing is making the decision to either separate or bring

together differences and stereotypes. His book Travel Writing ties into understanding

what the author wants to do with her travel writing. In this case Laura Groff is not

reinstating stereotypes and is to debunk the mermaid stereotypes and its portrayal of

women as weak. Dr. Thompsons book is useful for those interested in developing their

own piece of travel writing and those who are analyzing someone elses travel writing.

Groff, Lauren. Daughters of the Springs. Oxford American, Oxford American, 21 July

2014, www.oxfordamerican.org/magazine/item/151-daughters-of-the-springs.