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940 MAIN STREET, GREAT BARRINGTON, MA 413-528-4940
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Explore the Berkshires
FUN THINGS TO DO!
Grand Moving Sale scholarship fund. (413) 528-1804, ext 13, www.wizathon.com/gouldfarm
When: Friday, September 1, through Tuesday, October 31, 2017 2017 DownStreet Art Celebration
Where: Aerus Electrolux, 383 North Street, Pittsfield, MA
Cost: Free When: Thursday, September 28, 2017
Where: Berkshire Cultural Resource Center,
The Pittsfield Aerus Electrolux store is having a grand moving sale!
51 Main Street, North Adams, MA
Everything at the store will be 40 percent off regular price, including vacuum
Cost: Free
cleaners, air purifiers, laundry pro, supplies, and more. (413) 442-1544
Join us for the last Thursday of our DownStreet Art Celebration (our
2017 Annual Heritage Walks 10th season!) in downtown North Adams. Each summer from late June
until the end of September, DSA creates a wide program of visual
When: Three autumn weekends, Saturdays & Sundays, September 16-17, and performing art events including exhibitions, video screenings, and
23-24, and September 30-October 1, 2017 site-specific installations in downtown North Adams. (413) 662-5253,
Where: See full schedule at link below. www.downstreetart.org
Cost: Free
The public is invited to participate in informative, family-oriented, fun walks. Owner Appreciation Day
Expert historians, naturalists, and environmentalists will lead participants
on 80 explorations through historic estate gardens and town districts, When: Thursday, September 28, 2017, 8am-8pm
behind-the-scenes cultural site tours, nature walks, trail hikes, and more. Where: Berkshire Co-op Market, 42 Bridge Street, Great Barrington, MA
www.housatonicheritage.org/events/heritage-walks Cost: Free
Attention co-op owners! Stop in from 8am to 8pm for an event that
happens only four times a year! There will be demos, raffles, free
samples, and of course 10 percent off for active co-op owners (some
restrictions apply). www.berkshire.coop
Join us for the 8th Annual Berkshire Drum & Dance Fest to support the
Tamarack Hollow Nature & Cultural Center. The event features 75-plus
drum and dance artists from many genres in short performance sequences
from the Berkshires and beyond. This years theme is Honoring Women
in Drum and Dance. Festival proceeds will support the Tamarack Hollow
Nature & Cultural Center in Windsor, MA, a nonprofit organization Flynn VW Audi BMW in Pittsfield, MA, treats the needs of each
whose mission is to Inspire environmental and cultural awareness, individual customer with paramount concern. We know that you have
appreciation and stewardship. Tamarack Hollow provides year-round high expectations, and as a car dealer we enjoy the challenge of
meeting and exceeding those standards each and every time.
programs for all ages, is conserving 32 acres of highland boreal forest,
Allow us to demonstrate our commitment to excellence! We
and is planning to build a sustainable nature and cultural education center. encourage you to browse our online inventory, schedule a test
Doors open 6pm for world marketplace, silent auction, TH Video; show drive, and investigate financing options.
starts 7pm. Contact Aimee Gelinas at aimee@gaiaroots.com with
questions. www.tamarackhollownatureandculturalcenter.org (413) 443-4702 600 Merrill Road, Pittsfield, MA
flynnvw.com flynnaudi.com flynnbmw.com
Author Meet & Greet Times Betrayal
When: Wednesday, October 25, 2017, 3pm
Where: The Bookloft, 332 Stockbridge Road, Great Barrington, MA
Cost: Free GRAND MOVING SALE
Join us for a meet and greet, book signing, and informal discussion with Everything At The Store
David Adams Cleveland, the author of a new novel partially set in the
Berkshires, Times Betrayal. The book is a classic New England family
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saga, an epic love story, and a CIA mystery set in the Berkshires and
Concord, Greece and Venice, from Antietam to the fall of the Berlin
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When: Thursday, October 26, through Sunday, October 29, 2017 383 North Street, Pittsfield,
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Where: Sisters Used Furniture, 402 Park Street (Route 183), (413) 442-1544 | (413) 743-0985 | (802) 442-9560
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will be 30 to 70 percent off. Hurry in as supplies will be limited, and once
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the sale is over, so is our season. This is a sale that you do not want to miss.
you had for the last 25 years?
Store sale hours (as per the dates listed above) are Thursday 11am-4pm,
Open Monday-Friday 9-5,
How about Saturday 9-4
one?
Friday 11am-4pm, Saturday 11am-4pm, and Sunday 12-4pm. At Sisters
Used Furniture you will find great clean, quality used furniture at prices to 383 North Street, Pittsfield, MA www.aerusonline.com
fit every budget. www.facebook.com/sistersusedfurniture (413) 442-1544 | (413) 743-0985 | (802) 442-9560
Ann Getsinger
OUR BERKSHIRETIMES MAGAZINE'S
SEPT-OCT COVER ARTIST
M
aking artwork is the closest Ive
come to having my life make any
sense at all. Its both indulgent
and essential. Its about balancing freedom and
discipline, gut and brain, in order to explore this
temporary existence, to consider the sensuality of
nature and my personal connection to it.
~ Ann Getsinger
Ann Getsingers oil paintings have been described as realism reading she cites Mad magazine as an early influence, noting
with a twist. Real objects are placed in locations drawn from especially the drawings of Don Martin.
memory and imagination, in locations and circumstances that
materialize as the work unfolds, forming paintings that combine Anns work, which has been exhibited in museums and galleries
careful planning with free-falling. and hangs in hundreds of homes, can currently be seen at
Arundel Farm Gallery in Kennebunkport, Maine (look for her
Born in Waterbury, Connecticut, on October 22, 1956, Ann one-person show coming up in 2018), at local galleries including
grew up in then rural Watertown as the youngest of five in a The Meetinghouse Gallery in New Marlborough, Massachusetts,
creative household. She lived beside a working dairy, a nearby and at the occasional open studio also in New Marlborough.
horse farm, and surrounding woods and fields that provided a
powerful connection to nature every spare moment was spent Ann is now working on a connected series of 17 paintings
drawing or horseback riding. Her earliest memories are of making wandering through her lifetime (so far) experience in a small part
artwork. During this time, summers were spent at her familys of Maine, near Port Clyde, to be hung in the Merrill Memorial
cottage near Port Clyde, Maine, and a lifelong connection with the Library in Yarmouth, Maine, in September 2017. She recently had
coast was forged. Anns connection to place is evident as most of the pleasure of creating CD cover art
the backgrounds of her paintings show either the Berkshire Hills for talented singer/songwriter Ellis
of Western Massachusetts or the midcoast area of Maine, her (www.ellis-music.com). You can find
favorite places to live and paint. Anns latest work at Camilla Richman
Fine Arts in Osterville, Massachusetts,
After studying at Paier School of Art in New Haven, Connecticut, (www.camillarichmanfinearts.com)
and the San Francisco Art Institute, in 1980 Ann chose to settle including Eye in the Sky, Spring Run
permanently in Western Massachusetts where she studied with Away, and two new small moonlight-
realist artist Sheldon Fink. The artists home and studio is located themed paintings. Visit Anns website
in New Marlborough, Massachusetts, but she also works regularly at www.anngetsinger.com, and see
in the midcoast area of Maine. Her many interests include antique her Facebook page at www.facebook.
prints, historical ephemera, photography, decorative arts, and com/ann.getsinger.
Photo by Antonia Small
NE
BUY O E Visit us and find out more about
N
TO
G E T O
SALE! our Frequent Buyer Program!
FREE
READ? Discounts available for seniors,
teachers, students, and military.
Join us for Sit & Knit!
Wed & Fri 2-4pm and Wed 5-7:30pm
All skill levels welcome.
Open Wed-Thurs 12-5pm, Fri-Sat 10-5pm
130 Water Street, Lower Level, Williamstown, MA
www.spinoffyarnshop.com (413) 344-6257 (413) 528-1521 Great Barrington, MA www.thebookloft.com
413-358-0170
266 Main Street, Lee, MA
gifts@theuptownstore.org
www.theuptownstore.org
TOONERVILLE TROLLEY
RECORDS & CDs
It was her
New Used Imported compassion that was
Stop by for a visit!
Open Mon-Sat 10am-5pm so pretty.
413-458-5229
131 Water Street, Williamstown, MA
www.toonervilletrolleyrecords.com
Close your eyes. open your heart. concernedsingles.com
C: 413-441-2239 P: 413-243-0025
395 Laurel Street (RT 20), Lee, MA
www.RetroPopShop.com
(413) 884-5339
Open 12-5pm Wednesday - Saturday
130 Water Street, Williamstown, MA
www.mountaingoatartisans.com (413) 274-9900 www.sistersusedfurniture.com
Window Treatments GREAT BARRINGTON GUEST WING DRAMATIC GUNITE POOL $1,800,000
Hunter Douglas Graber Comfortex Norman Shutter
For all Your Decorating Needs Steve Erenburg
Upholstery, Draperies, Fabric & Wallpaper Associate (413) 663-0457
A resident of the Berkshires for 16 years, Steve has always been deeply
Berkshire
BerkshireFabric
Fabric& Wallpaper
& Wallpaper involved in his local community. He has strong business and negotiation
skills an asset to anyone looking to buy or sell real estate. Steve has been
274
274Wahconah
WahconahSt.,St.,
Pittsfield, MA MA
Pittsfield, married for 43 years, loves the Berkshires, and enjoys fishing and golf.
(413) 442-4420
413-442-4420
Open
Open dailydaily 10-5,
10-5:30, SatSat
10-4,10-4, closed
closed SundaySun COHEN + WHITE DISTINCTIVE TOWN & COUNTRY PROPERTIES
Lenox, MA (413) 637-1086
www.berkshirefabricwallpaper.com ASSOCIATES www.cohenwhiteassoc.com
We do not store our seeds in plastic bags, freezer bags, We trust that with these simple guidelines you will find your
plastic containers, or in open jars in a room with fluctuating own solutions to successfully store seeds in your home. May
temperatures and alternating darkness and light. What we are we emphasize that correct storage procedures apply to seeds
trying to do is to hold the seed in what we call slumber, wherever, whenever. For example, if you like to get your seed
waiting to wake up when planted in soil at the right order in early winter, please make sure that your seeds are properly
temperature with the necessary amount of water and light in cared for until sowing time!
which to germinate and grow.
~ Ian Robb, Turtle Tree Biodynamic Seed Initiative. To find more articles
Now to answer the question: You will need to adapt our method about seed saving and gardening or learn more about Turtle Tree Biodynamic
to your situation. Do you have a basement that is dry and stays Seed Initiative, you may visit us on the web at www.turtletreeseed.org or
cool all year round? If you do, make sure that your stored seeds tour the seed shop at our home, Camphill Village, in Copake, NY, just over
are protected from insects and animals. If you do not have a the western border of Massachusetts!
I f you wish to collect seeds from your own flower garden, harvest them on a dry and sunny day when the seedpods have
changed from green to brown and are easy to break open. Always harvest seeds from your best-performing, most vigorous
plants. Use clean, sharp garden scissors to cut the pods or seed heads from the plant and place in carefully labeled paper
collection bags so that you do not forget which seeds are which. Once you have collected your seeds, spread them out on a screen
or a piece of newspaper and dry them at room temperature for a week before long-term storage.
Wetlands Woodlands
Meadows Fields
Invasive Plant Control Pollinator Habitat
Brush Management Field Restoration
(413) 358-7400
www.nativehabitatrestoration.weebly.com
Licensed in MA CT NY VT
413-445-5678
www.berkshiresheds.com
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EMERGENCY ON CALL SERVICE 383 North Street, Pittsfield,
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(413) 442-1544 | (413) 743-0985 | (802) 442-9560
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We Will Use Green Cleaning Products Upon Request
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Certified & Trained Technicians With More Than 15 Years Experience. Open Monday-Friday 9-5,
How about Saturday 9-4
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3 Westview Road, Pittsfield, MA 383 North Street, Pittsfield, MA www.aerusonline.com
www.ServiceMasteroftheBerkshires.com (413) 442-1544 | (413) 743-0985 | (802) 442-9560
T his is a family-friendly take on a classic beautiful and hearty, highlighting the delicious bounty of fall. This
recipe has been adapted from Ina Garten by Guidos Fresh Marketplaces dietitian Rachel Alves. Serves 4 to 6.
Ingredients
1 small butternut squash (1-1 lbs) 3-5 T plus 1 T extra virgin olive oil
1 lb Brussels sprouts 1 tsp kosher salt
tsp freshly ground black pepper
1 cups Arborio rice
5 cups simmering chicken stock, divided
2 sage leaves
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
cup dry white wine, optional
2 T unsalted butter, diced
cup dried cranberries
Directions
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Peel the butternut squash,
remove the seeds, and cut it into -inch cubes. You should have
about 4 to 5 cups. Trim the brown ends off the Brussels sprouts,
remove any yellow outer leaves, and cut them in half. Place the
squash and the Brussels sprouts on a sheet pan and toss with 3
to 5 tablespoons of olive oil and the salt and pepper. Roast for
about 30 minutes, tossing once, until very tender. Set aside.
Place the rice, 4 cups of chicken stock, and the sage leaves in a
Dutch oven. Cover and bake for 45 minutes, until most of the
liquid is absorbed and the rice is al dente. Remove from the oven
and discard the sage. Add the remaining cup of chicken stock,
Parmesan, wine (if using), butter, remaining 1 tablespoon olive
oil, salt, and pepper, and stir vigorously for 2 to 3 minutes, until
the rice is thick and creamy. Add the roasted squash, Brussels
sprouts, and cranberries, and stir until heated through. Serve hot.
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A
few years ago I sustained a back injury that left me in a 5) Prepare tested preserving recipe using fresh produce and
wheelchair almost full time, and while it has hampered other quality ingredients.
me somewhat, it has also given me an opportunity to
try new things. One of these new things is gardening, but not in 6) Remove a jar from the hot water (with jar lifter or tongs),
the traditional sense. I adapted my own method by growing very and empty water from jar. Fill hot jars one at a time with prepared
hot peppers (and other things like cukes and peas, but mostly hot ingredients leaving recommended headspace. Remove air bubbles.
peppers) in containers on an old-fashioned picnic table so I can
reach them from my wheelchair. I also grow tomato plants along 7) Clean Mason jar rim and threads, center lid on jar, apply
my wheelchair ramp. I do well with them. band, and fingertip tighten. Place filled jars in canner making sure
water covers jars by 1 to 2 inches. Cover, and bring to a rolling boil.
In late summer, I harvest a slew of peppers, tomatoes, and cukes
way too much for our personal use and immediate consumption. 8) Process jars in the boiling water for the required time,
I mean, there is only so much salsa you can eat, and a pot of adjusting for altitude. Then turn off the heat, remove the canner
hot chili once a week can get boring, so what do I do with all lid, and allow jars to stand in canner for 5 minutes.
those beautiful peppers? I give some away, but people only take
so many. So, I learned to can them! I make homemade salsa, fire 9) Remove jars from canner and set upright on a towel
pickles, and hell pickled peppers. Its pretty easy and a fun way to undisturbed for 12 to 24 hours. Bands should not be retightened
spend a Sunday afternoon. as this may interfere with the sealing process.
I start with half-pint Mason jars, as these are a nice size to gift 10) Check jar lids for seals. Lids should not flex up and down
someone; then as the season progresses I switch to pint jars and when center is pressed. Remove bands. Try to lift lids off with
even quart jars towards the end of harvest. Last year I ended up your fingertips. If the lid cannot be lifted off, the lid has a good
with 36 assorted jars of canned produce. seal. If a lid does not seal within 24 hours, the product can be
immediately reprocessed or refrigerated and consumed promptly.
Following is a summary of the water bath canning instructions Label and store in a cool, dry, dark place up to one year.
found at www.freshpreserving.com. My own method varies a
little, but you should check out their website for the details. I find that the pickled stuff is ready to eat in three weeks but
tastes better if it cures longer. This pickling/canning method can
1) Read recipe and assemble equipment and ingredients. I be used on many different veggies like green beans, asparagus,
usually chop up a mixture of my peppers, red onions, garlic, cukes summer squash, and even watermelon rinds, and they can be
for fire pickles, and everything but cukes for the hell peppers. For made spicy by just adding hot pepper to the mix.
my pickling brine I use vinegar, water, and pickling or kosher salt
(table salt yellows brine). I also put a clove of garlic and a quarter Hot peppers may also be saved by drying them. Simply use a needle
teaspoon of pickling spice in the bottom of each jar. and thread to string them up, and hang till dry. When dry they can
be used as a holiday decoration and later in cooking. Hot peppers
2) Check jars, lids, and bands for proper functioning to have many health benefits, but if you ever find yourself in need of
prevent sealing issues or jar breakage. Wash all in hot, soapy an antidote, slowly drink a glass of milk which will help break the
water, rinse well, and dry bands. bonds capsaicin forms on your nerve receptors. For those of you
that like it HOT, youll find an amazing variety of hot peppers to
3) Heat home canning jars in hot (not boiling) water until read up about at www.tinyurl.com/y94y7d3a. Enjoy!
ready for use to prevent them from breaking when hot food is
added. Leave lids and bands at room temperature. ~ Michael Romano, a Great Barrington, MA, resident for almost 40 years,
is a retired chef and also enjoys writing. He and his wife, Susan, worked
4) Prepare boiling water bath by filling large pot or canner at the now-closed Kolburne School in New Marlborough, MA, for many
half full with water and simmer while covered with lid until jars years. Look for his fishing articles in this and previous issues of Our
are filled and placed in canner. BerkshireTimes magazine.
a perfect polish
TAKE ANY WRITING TO ANOTHER LEVEL
I t takes a true love of words and a keen sense of what makes this
language of ours so exquisite to gently but firmly and thoroughly
polish the glory from a work of prose. Rodelinde Albrecht is a
Brown-educated, highly experienced freelance copyeditor,
proofreader, and translator. From a yellow farmhouse in the
Berkshires, with the company of a cat named Minerva, she
makes the English language her life and her livelihood. A more
pleasant and dedicated associate is not to be found.
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Using Your Strengths at Work
A MORE PRODUCTIVE APPROACH TO CAREER DEVELOPMENT
By Jess Dods, MBA
Youve Arrived!
You worked hard to accumulate your wealth for
retirement. Let me help you optimize the income
distribution phase of your life.
Countries with the lowest rates of dairy and calcium Whey protein contains very little lactose, so there is a chance that
consumption (like those in Africa and Asia) have the lowest rates someone with lactose intolerance might be able to have whey.
of osteoporosis. However, I know some people who can tolerate whey protein and
others who cannot, so you might want to test it out for yourself.
Research shows that higher intakes of both calcium and dairy
products may increase a mans risk of prostate cancer by 30 to Overall, I recommend avoiding dairy, but especially if youre lactose
50 percent. intolerant. Dairy consumption can lead to increased cancer risk,
increased fracture risk, constipation, irritable bowel, bloating, gas,
Dairy consumption increases the bodys level of insulin-like diarrhea, allergies, eczema, and acne. None of that sounds good to me!
growth factor-1 (or IGF-1) a known cancer promoter.
One dairy product that many people can tolerate is ghee. Ghee is
Calcium isnt as bone-protective as we thought. Studies of simply clarified butter which has had all the water and milk solids
calcium supplementation have shown no benefit in reducing removed from it. That means it can be consumed by those who
fracture risk. In fact, vitamin D appears to be much more are allergic to dairy. Again, some people do well with ghee and
important than calcium in preventing fractures. others do not. It really depends on the individual.
These are just a few of the findings related to the harm that How to Test for Dairy Sensitivity
A
therapy by treating the whole body
We focus on dynamics
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Center for Functional Medicine, the founder and medical director of The
UltraWellness Center in Lenox, MA, chairman of the board of the Institute A
while addressing specific areasskofLisa
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speak to your
dysfunction. Providing individualized
to
pain or
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determine your strengths
and weaknesses.
for Functional Medicine, a medical editor of The Huffington Post, and was speak
1:1 therapist time promotes to your
consistency in
a regular medical contributor on many television shows including CBS This
company,
care and full healing.company,
club or and weaknesses.
Our unique approach to
club
By focusing on or
finding
Our unique approach to
Morning, The Today Show, and Good Morning America. www.drhyman.com organization
successful movement patterns -
and building physical therapy is called
organization - physical therapy is called
on this, our patients cancomplimentary!
achieve healing with Applied Functional
minimal to no discomfort.complimentary! ScienceApplied
or ChainFunctional
Reaction
~ Lisa Baumgart, MPT, FAFS Science orTransformation.
Chain Reaction
Transformation.
Improve
Improve
Mobility
Mobility
function! function!
greylockpt.com 31 Williamstown Road, Lanesboro, MA
Hidden Dairy / Published with permission from godairyfree.org, reprinted from Go Dairy Free: The Guide and Cookbook
T here are the obvious dairy foods such as cows milk (chocolate, whole, skim, malted, evaporated), buttermilk, half-and-half, cream,
butter, cheese, ice cream, milk shakes, and yogurt. However, did you know that the majority of processed foods also contain dairy?
Milk proteins and lactose, the culprits of milk allergies and lactose intolerance respectively, often lurk in some of the strangest places.
Below we have a partial list of manufactured foods where dairy ingredients may be hiding. We guarantee a few will surprise you!
Artificial sweeteners Some are derived from dairy foods. Goats milk Contains proteins similar to cows milk and lactose.
Baby formula Read the labels carefully on this one. Granola & nutrition bars May contain milk additives.
Bakery goods This is a hard one to verify; look for ingredients. Gravies Some utilize milk ingredients for flavor and texture.
Baking mixes (cakes, biscuits, pancakes) Some okay brands. Hot cocoa mix Some have milk ingredients added.
Bath products Avoid if you have skin reactions to milk products. Hot dogs What isnt in hot dogs?
Bread Whey, other milk proteins, possibly cheese or butter. Imitation maple & other syrups Go for the real stuff.
Breath mints A few contain casein-related ingredients. Instant potatoes Particularly the au gratin varieties.
Canned tuna fish Some contain hydrolyzed caseinate. Kosher parve desserts Although most parve foods are okay.
Caramel It may either be made from sugar and water or milk. Lactose-free milks They may still be loaded with milk proteins.
Cereal Dry and instant cereals vary significantly in ingredients. Lunch meats & sausages Lactose and caseinates are common.
Chewing gum Some brands contain milk protein ingredients. Margarine Most are not dairy free.
Chicken broth Several brands use milk proteins or solids. Meal replacements, protein powders & beverages
Chocolate Milk chocolate, and some semisweet and dark. Peanut butter A very few may contain milk solids.
Chocolate drinks Even some nonmilk varieties contain dairy. Potato chips Particularly risky among the flavored varieties.
Coffee creamers Well, something makes them white and creamy. Salad dressings Most natural brands have dairy-free flavors.
Cookies & crackers Often the most processed foods of them all. Sherbet Different from sorbet and usually contains milk or cream.
Cream liqueurs May possess solid milk ingredients or caseinates. Soup Obviously the creamy varieties, but even some of the tomato-
Custard & pudding Most contain milk products. and chicken-based soups are not dairy free.
Drugs & vitamins Lactose is the base for a number of them. Soy meat products Guilty of harboring milk proteins.
Eggnog Make an at-home version with milk alternatives. Soy cheeses Yep, they often contain milk proteins.
Fat replacers Some are derived from milk. Spice mixes Several contain whey powder.
Fondues Isnt this the word the Swiss use for cheese? Whipped toppings Lets just say that the term nondairy topping
Fried foods The breading; also, cheese is commonly added. is used rather loosely; these products contain casein.
Time saving. CEREC simplifies what was once a complex 4) The milled restoration is bonded directly to your tooth.
process into a single appointment, saving you considerable time.
This also eliminates the need for a temporary crown. When you visit a dental office that takes traditional impressions
to be sent to their lab, there is a great possibility the laboratory
No conventional impressions. The CEREC camera takes a will fabricate a CEREC crown. This is because 95 percent of
3D image of your tooth in just a few seconds, eliminating the need dental laboratories are now using CAD/CAM technology. By
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Ask Vicki
Send Your Questions to vicki@vickibaird.com
By Vicki Baird
F ifteen years ago, I quit my corporate job to discover my own path. Today, I help people just like you develop your gifts,
harness them, and take them out to the world. Welcome to Ask Vicki where I will use my Intuitive Life Coach and Belief Re-
patterning experience to answer your questions. If you have a concern (career path, relationships, or mind and spirit related
issues) email me at vicki@vickibaird.com.
Dear Vicki, bad our parents are, we want to believe they are good people. She
I am married to a man who was married and divorced before. cannot see her mother the way you do. Concentrate on appreciating
They had two children, which my husband and I now share full the fact that she is in your life and try to let go of past events. Its
custody of. His ex has pulled some rotten things over the years like playing tug of war: when one person drops the rope, the other
in regards to us. How do I let go of my anger towards her, and person either falls on their fanny or they realize that there is no
second, how do I not resent my daughter because she protects longer a tug of war. Think of it as a gift to yourself to drop the
her mom, after all the nonsense? ~Karen, Great Barrington, MA anger. The relationship will improve over time.
Dear Karen, Being a parent, full or step, is incredibly challenging at times, but
Oh, honey, you are speaking my life. I had the same experience it can also be the best platform to learn about yourself and how
with my two, now adult, stepsons. What I have come to know is to compromise. Take a lot of deep breaths and be patient with
that the anger we hang on to only impacts us, it does not impact yourself. That will help the most. ~ From one super stepparent to
those who have created the drama. They are usually clueless. As another, Vicki
for letting go of the resentment towards your daughter, try to
appreciate her for being a loving person because no matter how Dear Vicki,
How do you best deal with a partner who decides to leave a
wonderful seven-year relationship because she is drawn back to
her family and career in Kentucky? ~ Paul, California
Vicki Baird Intuitive Life Coach
Imagine what could happen . . . Dear Paul,
if you believed in you! I am sorry she decided to do that. One way to begin to deal with
Experience Belief Re-patterning to this situation is to ask yourself what, if anything, you can see now
help you change your belief systems. in your relationship with this woman that was not as wonderful as
(413) 499-9791 you thought it may have been. Often this type of awareness can
only come in retrospect after a big shift.
Vicki is the only certified
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Then, I would take the time to think about what it is that you want,
www.vickibaird.com not only from relationships, but in life in general. I cant speak
for her, but if she was drawn back to her birth family and career,
she is in essence really saying she needs to return to herself, and
there isnt anything you can do about that. Its frustrating and it
S heilaa Hite
Intuitive Counselor
Featured in Paulette Coopers directory,
hurts, no doubt, but you need to take the time to let the emotions,
including grief, come up. While honoring her choice you must
also honor your process. The end of a relationship is a death to
the emotional self, and the time it takes to heal is different for
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Animal Talk
Dog nose prints are as unique as human fingerprints and
can be used to identify them. ~ www.thefactsite.com
Google Earth shows that cow and deer herds align like
compass needles to the magnetic poles of the earth, as do
other creatures including flies, bees, and goldfish, when there
isnt anything around to disturb them. So why do they do it? Its
still a mystery. One possibility is that keeping magnetic fields in
symmetry about the axis of your body could affect health and CARING FOR PETS SINCE 1957
certain bodily processes. There is evidence to back this up in
humans, the time it takes to drift into REM sleep and the electrical
activity in the brain differs depending on the direction you sleep
Your trusted source
(www.scienceblogs.com). Its good to note that researchers say
that if you live in the northern hemisphere, it is not a good for quality foods
idea to sleep with your head facing north because the magnetic and supplies.
pull will cause pressure on your brain. Any direction other than
north is OK, but east is best. ~ www.tinyurl.com/zxug9ek Your trusted resource
for raw-feeding
Sea otters hold hands while theyre sleeping so they dont
drift apart. ~ www.mentalfloss.com information
and advice.
Opossums hoover up ticks as they wander the forest.
Many ticks try to feed on opossums and few survive the
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that kill more than 95 percent of the ticks they carry. These
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Black cats arent an omen of ill fortune in all cultures. In the www.bensdotters.com
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A
s a child, I remember feeling a bit befuddled about Will bedtimes be different? What will change about meals
my moms edginess when my grandparents came to together? What kinds of activities will likely happen?
town. I certainly felt nothing but excitement about
their visits. As a child, I didnt have a sense of how Our children like to be prepared and have a sense of what to expect.
my grandparents presence would change our family routines Involving them in the discussion, planning, and preparation can
and shift our family dynamics. alleviate not only their anxiety but also our own angst.
No matter how loving, patient, and well-meaning our extended Mapping out the days and what to expect on a family calendar
families can be, having additional people mixed into the scene, provides a visual guide for the changes in routine. A whiteboard
especially during the holiday season, can add layers of stress. works well, easily allowing for modifications if the plans become
Often our children absorb this unspoken stress. Their behavior overwhelming. Have conversations about what activities are most
may even shift as a result. enjoyable for everyone. Cut back on those that are not essential.
Recently, when my parents came to town for a visit, I was Collecting snippets and stories of favorite experiences can be a
completely focused on wanting everything to be perfect during bonding experience for extended family members. Part of the
their stay. Even though they were flexible and easygoing, I was ritual of coming back together around the holidays can include
anxious about how my children would behave, worried about sharing, and even documenting, different memories of past times
making sure everyone was happy, and distracted by coordinating together. This kind of sharing offers everyone a way to reorient
meals and activities. and reunite. The recollections can even be collected in a kind of
family memory book that can be pulled out when everyone gets
When my youngest child started launching into a slew of back together again.
attention-getting behavior, I realized he was sending an important
message about his unmet needs. I needed to shift my focus. Children and relatives want to help. Intentionally enlisting
extended family to support childrens involvement can create
The first thing I did was to give him my complete attention. I a win-win for everyone. Some possible collaborative activities
watched him draw. I sat next to him. I helped him when he asked, include food preparation (scrubbing potatoes, mixing dough,
even though I knew he could do the various tasks himself. This tearing lettuce for a salad), making simple decorations, setting the
tending to didnt last long. Within 15 minutes of undivided table, folding the laundry, and even dusting and tidying. We all
attention, he was chipper and cooperative. Even a few minutes of feel more settled when we feel useful and engaged.
loving attention can refuel a child feeling disconnected.
This holiday season we have an opportunity to consciously create
Once my son felt secure and satisfied, I was able to talk with new rituals and opportunities for our children and our extended
him about how I had been feeling stressed. I apologized. Then families. Rather than rely upon old patterns perhaps learned from
I explained that our routines were going to be a little different previous generations, lets plan our time
with Grandmom and Granddad visiting. I also reaffirmed of togetherness and mindfully prepare
the importance of being respectful and polite with visiting ourselves and our children.
family members, a message he was ready to hear after he felt
connected to me. ~ K. Meagan Ledendecker is the Director of
Education and Co-Founder of The Montessori
In preparing ourselves, and our children, for time with extended School of the Berkshires. This holiday season
family and changes during the holidays, we can consciously reflect her three children and husband look forward to
together about what routines will shift, what traditions we want creating some new family rituals with extended
to honor, and what joys and challenges the time may bring. family members. www.berkshiremontessori.org
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