IELTS-planet writing

The best way for government to solve the problem of traffic congestion is providing
free public transport in 24 hours per day, 7 days a week. To what extent do you
agree or disagree?
It is undoubtedly true that traffic snarl-up how to tackle snarled-up traffic is becoming a Commented [LAD1]: Traffic snarl-up is obviously a serious
problem. People argue about the best way to solve it, not about
controversial issue in many major cities. In my opinion, I agree that the most appropriate itself
solution of government is to supply free public transport system.

Firstly, public transport assist to reduce the amount of vehicles on the road. Indeed, buses or
trains has a seating capacity of from 50 to several hundred whereas the private vehicles such as
motor or car can cover up to a maximal 7 seats maximally. If we use public transport instead of
private one, it is able to release remarkable the number of vehicles which are the prior major
reason leading to traffic jam. For example, when HCM city launched the bus route number 91
from Tan Binh District to National University, it contributed to control the heavy traffic jam on
Cong Hoa road.

Furthermore, free public transport in 24 hours everyday has positive impact on consumers
choice between public and private means because of some benefits. In particular, using
common transport allow people to save much money and time as well as interact with others.
For instance, when I drive my motorbike to work, it take me around 1 million VND for fuels,
fare, and maintenance service and as well as 60 hours for driving per month. By saving this
money and time, I can purchase and read my interesting books or solve many individual
problems. Above all, it opens up ample opportunities to communicate with other people. Commented [LAD2]: The paragraph is fine. However, if you
focus on the 24 hours everyday, it should be better. Eg: good
choice with competitive price if you stay late in the office then go
However, as a result of this free system, governments may face some financial problems. They home compared to taxi.
have to pay salary for driver, fuels, fare but without revenue. This is apparent challenges Commented [LAD3]: There is no problem with this one.
because not only does governments have a large budget but they also have to balance it well. However, try to use more academic structure. Eg: They are subject
to a heavy expenditure on drivers salary, fuels and fares without
Generally, despite of some drawbacks, I believe that creating the free transport system is the any revenues.

best solution for government to control traffic congestion.

Grade

Task 6.5 Your key ideas are strong. However, they are not sufficiently
Response covering all parts of the topic.

Cohesion 7 Its fine, logically organizing and presenting the ideas.

and
Coherence

Vocabulary 6 Good paraphrasing; however you should try to use uncommon

lexical items and topic-related vocabulary.

Grammar 6.5 Good but not various. I recommend to use more grammatical
structures.

Overall 6-7 Good

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