But Karoge Kya?

Characters:

Naani: In her 70’s, curious, has a point of reference for everything being discussed and a habit of
comparing everybody to somebody she knows.

Mamaji: The uninvited guest, who is extremely close to Naani, has expert opinions on
everything. Feels hungry every few minutes

Mom: Is very proud of her son’s achievements and loves to throw inappropriate jargon into
conversations

Dad: Is always on the phone discussing weird things. We’ll find out why ….

Sunny: A young boy who has just been placed at Xceedence

Script:

The film opens in an upper middle class household in North India where the family is discussing their
son’s campus placement.

Dad: Accha thik hai, thik hai, tension mat lo. Bus soch ke batao use kal kaha kaha leke gaye the..

(starts noting things in a writing pad) ..stairs pe…accha woh fire exit wala, waha pe CCTV hai?

Naani and Mamaji enters talking loudly, Dad leaves mumbling softly

Naani: Aur kya? Tabhi toh main bol rahi thi ki gol gappe ka stall laga do, per plate kharcha kam ho
jayega.

Mamaji: Wahi toh, accha plate se yaad aya, bhook si lag rahi hai, kuch ban raha hai kya kitchen mein.

Enter son.

Sunny: Naniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! You won’t believe aaj kya hua!

Naani: Dekh beta abhi abhi pressure ki dawai li hai, jaldi se bata de kya hua hai.

Mom: Arey Mummyji, jobs mil gaya hai hamare Sunny ko.

Mamaji: Acchaaa! Toh offer letter mila haath mein? Ya bus aise hi? Aajkal aise fraud cases bohot hotey
hai.

Naani: Haaaan, maine bhi suna tha Sujata ke ladke ke saath….

Sunny: Guys! Guys! Offer letter bhi mila hai or joining date bhi. Okay? Now can we celebrate?

Mamaji: Arey haan! Main toh kab se soch raha hoon, kuch khaane mein… kuch celebration ho jaaye

Hovering Dad: Toh Mummy ko toh I’m sure pata nahi hoga, but kya biwi ko koi idea hai?

Everybody stops talking and follows him as he walks out of the room.
Scene changes and everybody is at the dinner table. Mamaji is busy stuffing his face. Nani is opening lids
and making faces hinting disapproval.

Mamaji (with food in his mouth): Accha beta, celebration toh thik hai. But yeh toh batao ke profile kya
hai? Matlab kya banoge tum is ke baad?

Sunny: So I’ve been hired as a Data Scientist…

Mom (cutting him short): Scientist hai scientist, family ka pehla.

Naani: Kaisa scientist? Matlab karna kya hai?

Sunny: Uhhhh…toh kuch reading lena hota hai, aur phir usse analyse karke batate hai ki kya hoga

Naani: Toh is mein scientist kaha hai? Yeh toh hamara Ganesh bhi karta tha, ek ek gaai ko dekh ke bata
deta tha ki kaunsi gaai kitna doodh deti hai.

Dad joins the table, but he’s still on his phone.

Mom: Kaisi baatein kar rahe ho mummy, yeh Engineering karke gaay thodi dekhega.

Mamaji: Arey mummy, main batata hoon yeh kuch aur hai, jaise ke socho ek date hain, ab do date hain
toh use datey bolte hai, toh aise saalbhar ke date ko daata bolte hai, aur scientist batate hai ki agle saal,
kaun kaunse date pe Purnima, Amavasya, grahan, yeh sab hoga. Kyun Sunny?

Sunny: Noooooooooo. Yeh IT ka kaam hai, aur thoda insurance ka bhi.

Dad: (Suddenly keeps his phone aside and looks up)Insurance? Insurance join kar raha hai tu? Mujhe
dekh ke nahi seekha. Pak gaya tha main us job mein, ab jaa ke yeh private detective wali kaam mein
maza aa raha hai.

Naani: Subah se pata nahi kiska dabba kho gaya hai, aur yeh laga padha hai dhundne mein. Ise detective
kehte hai? Detective toh…

Sunny: Ab sab ka speculation ho gaya hai toh mai bata du? (mock epic background score begins) Ek
company hai, Xceedence, jo ki insurance technology ka kaam karti hai. Aur main jaa raha hoon insurance
ke duniya ko hamesha hamesha ke liye badalne (reaches crescendo as he looks determined like a poster
boy of impending revolution)

(there’s a momentary pause, after which Mamaji adds two more puri’s to his plate and says)

Mamaji: Woh toh thik hai, but Xceedence ka matlab kya hain…?

The family starts speculating again. Cut to end-slate.

End-slate:

It’s going to be the ‘IT’ job of 2020.

And we are hiring.
Think you have it?

<Find out>