Lessons of

Love and Wisdom 2

Diana Herawati, S.Pd.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 1

 Lessons of
Love and Wisdom 2

By
Diana Herawati, S.Pd.
Editor & Proof Reader
Wahiduddin Richard Shelquist

“By no means shall ye attain

righteousness unless ye give
(freely) of that which ye love; and
whatever ye give, of a truth God
knoweth it well.”
( Surat Al-„Imran 3: 92 )

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 2

 Preface
In the name of Allah,
Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Many people feel that they truly love their spouses,
their parents, sisters, brothers, friends or others. They can say
“I love you” easily to the one they love and to others. It
appears true that they really do love each other. They share
what they have, they smile to each other, they enjoy their love
together. But actually we do not know whether they really love
each other or not, we do not know the reality of their heart.
People are able to behave as if they love each other, but when
one of them has a problem, will the other one leave?
Love is much like a ladder. Love is a journey to the
top. We must climb toward the higher steps of love one by one
in order to meet the Highest True Lover: Allah. “Ye shall surely
travel from stage to stage” (Surat al Inshiqaq 84:19)
Only Allah knows who will be eligible to go to the next
step or to the next stage. Yet each person will be able to know
it if they are honest to their heart, and they will know when
they are in a higher stage than before.
Along with the stages of love, the lessons of wisdom
also go through their stages too. That is the beautiful lesson of
life. Allah is the Most Powerful in giving everyone exactly what
they need.
This journey of love and wisdom is a life-long journey
which gets more wonderful at each stage. For success and
happiness, each person must continually make an effort to
complete the journey, step by step, to the highest step
Hopefully the stories in this booklet will be able to help
the reader climb to the highest steps to meet the Highest One.

Malang, 23 April 2010

Diana Herawati, S.Pd.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 3

 CONTENTS
Preface 3
Contents 4

Part I: Love
The Proof of Love 5
Love of Wives 6
Love of Sister/brothers 9
Love of Daughters/sons 12
Love of Friends 15
Love of Employee 17
Love of Boss/Leader 19

Part 2: Wisdom
Green House 22
Language Laboratory 25
Examinations 27
A Button of the Shirt 29
Final Examination 31
The Land Lord 34
Boss and Slave 36
Promise 38

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 4

PART I

THE PROOF OF LOVE

For some people it is very easy to speak of their
love for their beloved, and for others it is very difficult
for them to speak of their love. Each person has different
ways to express his/her love, and he/she has also
different ways to prove his/her love.
Some people like to write or read poems for their
beloved to show that he/she loves his/her partner. Some
like to give presents to make his/her partner happy, and
some like to help his/her partner when she/he is in a
difficult situation. Some like to sing songs or compose
songs for their beloved partner, and there are still many
other ways of expressing love.
Many people think that the only way to express
their love is by having an intimate relationship with their
beloved, so they can enjoy the beautiful situation and
condition they create together. That is the beautiful
relationship between a man and a woman. However, love
is not only for the relationship between a man and a
woman in the form of marriage, but also for the
relationship among many kinds of people.
Do we really love our beloved one? When people
say that they really love their beloved ones or beloved
partner, then Allah will often test our love to help our
love grow stronger and better.
It is very easy to express our love in the way that
we want, we can choose the way that we like and it is
easy for us to do. It is not so easy to express our love in
the way that Allah chooses for us. We have to try hard to
do what Allah chooses as the way for us, that is the
challenge for us because a different way may put us in a
difficult situation until we learn to understand how to do
it the way Allah has chosen for us.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 5

 LOVE OF WIVES/husbands

Marriage is one of the forms of the love between

a man and a woman. When a man or a woman loves his
partner then they want to live and stay together so that
they can express and enjoy their love.
When a wife loves her husband, she will care for
him and give good services to him. The wife will do
anything for her husband in order to make him happy;
such as preparing his breakfast, giving him a smile,
preparing his work clothes, accompanying him to watch
television, and in many other ways.
When a wife does them routinely and the husband
also expresses his love to her by helping her do the
housework together, it is a balanced situation of love that
they have, working together.
But what if one of them cannot express his love
to his partner because of something that happened that
makes him unable to make her happy?
Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 6
 When a husband gets a serious illness and he has
to be hospitalized or stay in bed for a long time, he needs
help from other people, especially from his wife. How
can a wife show that she really loves him? I have a story
about it in the hospital:
There is a husband who suffered a serious stroke
and had to be hospitalized for more than a month. He
could not do anything for himself, he even needed
someone to feed him. This situation was a test given to
the wife by Allah to show how much she loved her
husband. This situation of course was not very easy for
her, she did not choose that way because it was very
difficult for her to do.
The body of her husband was bigger than her. It
was difficult for her to help her husband to sit or to
change his clothes because her husband could not move
his body by himself. He needed the help of others
completely.
His wife fed him patiently at breakfast, lunch and
dinner time. She even helped him to eat cookies too. He
could nothing do by himself at that time. His wife also
sometimes kissed him to show that she still loved him
though he just stayed in bed everyday.
And Allah made the test even more difficult.
Though the husband could do nothing, he was often
angry with her when he wanted something but she was
gone just for a minute. He was angry with her and those
words really hurt her heart because she tried to serve her
husband well but he was not grateful for what she had
done.
What if the wife becomes ill and can not do
anything? Can he be patient in taking care of her? Or will
he leave her and find another woman, defending himself
by saying that he cannot survive himself without the help
of woman.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 7

 That is the test of the real love. Can we love our
partner no matter what the situation?. Love will always
make people patient, love will never make us angry.
Love will make us helpful to one another and love will
cause us to be a good partner, a faithful partner, a loyal
partner.

“ For Muslim men and women,- for believing

men and women, for devout men and women,
for true men and women, for men and women
who are patient and constant, for men and
women who humble themselves, for men and
women who give in charity, for men and women
who fast ( and deny themselves), for men and
women who guard their chastity, for men and
women who engage much in God‟s praise, - for
them has God prepared forgiveness and great
reward.”
(Surat al-Ahzab 33:35)

“Women impure are for men impure, and men

impure for women impure and women of purity
are for men of purity, and men of purity are for
women of purity: these are not affected by what
people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a
provision honorable.”
(Surat al-Nur 24:26)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 8

 LOVE OF SISTERS/BROTHERS

Love among sisters and brothers is easy to do for

some people. But for others, love for sisters and brothers
in the family is very difficult.
When parents have more than one child in their
family, then the parents must find time to love each of
the children. Children, from toddlers to teenagers, need
to express love for their brothers or sisters, and they need
to avoid jealousy about the love expressed by their
parents.
When a mother gives more care to the youngest
child, other children need to understand what their
mother or father is doing.
I often hear my students complain because their
mothers give more care or more attention to the other
children in their families. Their parents do it because
they have some reasons of course, but the children do not
know or understand the reasons. The children usually

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 9

think of themselves only, think of what they need. That is
the time for them to learn to love their sisters and their
brothers. They also have to avoid jealousy when their
sisters or brothers are more successful in their school or
study and the parents give them more attention.
As children we have to love by respecting and
helping our sisters or brothers so that they can be
successful in their study. Love them truly! Allah bestows
different talent and skill to each child. Children have to
accept what they are and learn and work hard to get
knowledge for sharpening their brain and skill so that
they can be successful in their study.
When teenagers grow older and older, they will
have their families. They will be busy with their children
and their spouse. But the test of love among
sisters/brothers is still continued till the end of this world.
A parent may be busy thinking of himself and
thinking of his family including his children and his
spouse. Is he still thinking of his sisters and brothers after
he has his own family? Actually parents have to expand
their love wider and wider and larger and larger from day
to day.
I have a story of love between and a sister and a
brother in the hospital:
There was a man who was having problem with
his health. He could not walk because of an accident. He
was a soldier and still single. And because of the bad
condition of his health, he had to go to the hospital for
about two years. He had to stay in the hospital for two
months then went home, then back again for months in
the hospital. His mother was not strong enough to
accompany him in the hospital. So, his sister
accompanied him and helped him completely when he
was hospitalized. His sister had one son and a husband.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 10

For months they (husband, herself and her son) slept in
the hospital under the bed of her brother. Besides caring
of her family, she still took care of her brother. That was
not easy for her to do it, but she did it with love. That is
the wonderful power of love. Love will make a person a
good sister too.

”None of you will truly believe until you love for

your brother what you love for yourself”. (Al-
Bukhari)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 11

 Love of Daughters/sons

Being a daughter or a son is a wonderful time to

be in the family because parents always try to fulfill all
the needs of their children. Though a daughter or son
may make many mistakes, parents never stop loving the
child. In other words we can say that parents always love
the children. How about the love of the children toward
their parents?
It is very easy for young children to love their
parents. But in some cases there are some children who
are angry with their parents, such as those who cannot
love their parents because they have been abandoned by
their parents. They may live with their grandparents for
example or just stay with their mother because their
fathers got married to another woman. They lack the love
of a father because their father never cared for them,
making it is very difficult for the children to love their
father, and perhaps difficult to love anyone.
It is very easy to say “I love you mom, dad” when
we are together and also because we get everything from
them every day. As time passes, the children grow older
Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 12
and have their own family. Do the children still love their
parents? It is very easy to say “I love you mom, dad” but
how to take care of them truly?
I saw an old man who was hospitalized for days,
with only his old wife who helped and accompanied him.
The wife was not too healthy, yet she accompanied him
in the hospital. When I asked the old wife about her
children, she said that her children were busy with their
work and their families. Though the parents did not want
to disturb the activities of their children, the children
should always offer to help their parents.
When my father was hospitalized for about eight
days, I had to accompany him alone because my mother
was not strong enough to see the condition of my father.
So I asked her to stay at home.
It was a difficult time, and I had to learn about the
love between a daughter and a father. At that time my
father was not able to change his clothes by himself and I
also had to help him to go to the bathroom It was very
difficult for me to take care of him. I needed extra energy
and extra money because I had to pay for all the
medicine and services given by the hospital. I had to
change his soiled clothes many times. It reminded me of
the time when I was a baby, how many times my mother
and father changed my soiled clothes in a day. With my
father, I needed extra patience to do it, yet love made me
able to face that difficult situation.
Parents try hard to give their children good food,
clothes and education, they find the courage to borrow
money just to be able to give their children a good
education and they hope that in the future their children
can get a good job so that they can have a better life than
their parents’. What if the parents are sick and need help
from their children who have their own jobs? Will the

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 13

children help them like when their parents who tried so
hard to make them as they are now?
For some people who have enough money to do
it, they can do it easily. Allah chooses the way to test us,
and usually it is not like what we want. The grown
children are not rich enough, yet their parents need help
from them. Will they borrow the money from others to
help their parents? Or will they just say that their money
is only enough for their families? If their parents have
nothing to eat, will they share their food with their
parents? When they were children, their parents always
gave them good food, and yet nowadays often their
parents do not have anything to eat. Loving parents feel
full when they see their children eating even though they
do not eat at all, Nonetheless, the children must find
away to help them.
Love makes us patient, love makes us able to
sacrifice and love makes us able to take care of others.
Love makes us able to be grateful for the parents’ love by
loving them too.

"And we have enjoined on man (To be good) to

his parents: In travail upon travail did his
mother bear him. And in years twain was his
weaning: (hear the command), 'Show gratitude
to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final)
Goal.'" (Surat Luqman 31:14)
"Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none
but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether
one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say
not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them
but address them, in terms of honor." (Surat al-
Isra‟ 17:23)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 14

 LOVE OF FRIENDS

Close friends, best friends, or whatever it is

called, is about love among friends. Who are our friends?
They can be our classmates, they can be our roommates,
they can also be our neighbors.
What is a friend? A friend is one who wants to
listen to us whether we tell of bad times or happiness. A
friend is also the one who is able to accept whatever we
are. A friend is willing to be with us in any situation,
whether it is bad or good
Many people call themselves friends ,but they run
away when their friends are in a difficult situation. And
there are many who will give a suggestion to their friends
when they are in difficulty, yet then when their friend
carries out their suggestion and the situation becomes
worse, they feel they are not responsible for the results of

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 15

their suggestion. They do not even want to be close again
to their friends who have such problems.
A real friend will be happy to see his friend’s
happiness and success. When there is someone who is
jealous to see his friend successful in her work or in her
study, it shows that he/she is not a real friend.
Love among friends will create an amazing
atmosphere in a class, in a room, in an office, in a
neighborhood, and also in other places. A friend will help
other friends to get a higher rank or position in her job. A
friend will feel happy to see friends get a rich partner,
handsome partner or beautiful partner. A friend will be
sad to see friends having problems. A friend is always
available for friends, whatever situation those friends
may have.
But on the other hand, there is the one who will
call others friends only when they can help him/her. He
is kind to them because they can fulfill his needs. Then
he will say that they are not his friends when they cannot
help him, or he may even criticize their weaknesses or
say bad things about them. Such a person is not a real
friend.
A friend will guard the secret of a friend. A friend
will not talk about the weakness of friends to others. And
Allah may test the love of friends by showing the bad
side of those friends to him. Will he keep it as a secret or
will he talk about it to others? Will he accept his friends
exactly as they are?

“The believers are brothers, so make peace

between your brothers and heed Allah so that
hopefully you will gain mercy.” (Surat al-
Hujurat, 49:10)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 16

 LOVE OF EMPLOYEEs

The situation in the office, factory, or in the

company among the employees or workers is created by
the love among them. And the character of the employee
sometimes is influenced by the character of their boss.
The jealousy among them is also influenced by
the service of their boss to them. No matter how their
boss behaves, employees should strive to love him, not
for their own personal gain, but simply because we must
learn to love others in all situations. Love is about
accepting others as they are, and having a willingness to
help them make progress toward their own goals.
The success or failure of the employee is often
supported or caused by his boss, yet no matter how the
boss behaves, an employee should strive to love his boss
truly.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 17

 The way a boss treats his employee usually has
some special purpose and he knows the talent,
personality, and the skill of each employee. The
employee should always have positive thoughts about the
boss. And if the boss makes a mistake, the employee
should discuss it with him in a kind way.
If the boss has a problem, it can influence the
atmosphere and the life of all of the employees too, so it
is always better for the employees to offer love and
kindness to the boss.
An employee can express love by working
seriously and in a right way of course. As a good
employee, he will not wait for the command first to
beginning working. He knows what he must do, he
knows what he must not do, and the important thing is
that he does not work only when the boss is watching,
but he works because he knows what he has to do. He
works because he is responsible and he works because of
his love.
Love of employees toward the boss will bring
success for everyone involved.

“I have only created jinns and men, that they

may serve Me. “(Surat al-Dhariyat 51:56)

“ Say: “Truly, my prayer and my service of

sacrifice, my life and my death, are (all) for God,
the Cherisher of the Worlds:”
(Surat al-An‟am 6:162)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 18

 LOVE OF BOSS/LEADER

Being a boss is the dream of almost everybody.

Everybody wants to have a high position in his job.
Seeing the rewards of being a boss makes everybody
work hard to get that position. However, many people
only see the duty of the boss, not many people see the
responsibility of the boss.
The progress of a company, a factory, institution,
school, or office depends partly on the employees, but
the boss has a big role in that progress. The boss also
influences the prosperity of the employee too. The boss
should behave like a father or a mother of the employees
too, to make them happy working in a good atmosphere.
If there is an employee who is having a problem in his
family or his life, the boss should help him. The boss
should strive to protect the employee from danger, and
the boss should strive to make the employee happy.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 19

 A loving boss will not only receive the benefit
from his employee’s good reputation, but a loving boss
will behave wisely and justly. He will not only think of
his position, but he thinks of all aspects completely and
seriously. He is not afraid to lose his position but he is
worried if he cannot be responsible as the boss. He will
not ask to be served, but he will be available for all to be
their consultant so that his employees can work well. A
good boss does not like to stay in his chair, waiting for
everybody to sit in front of him, but he will come to them
to see whether someone needs his help in doing his duty.
If all are like the above example, and work wisely, then
the atmosphere will make the plant grow everywhere, in
whatever side of the place the employee and the boss are.
The love of the boss will make the factory,
school, factory even a country run well. The love of the
boss will help to bring prosperity to all.

"And O my people! Give just measure and

weight, nor withhold from the people the things
that are their due: commit not evil in the land
with intent to do mischief.” (Surat Hud 11:85)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 20

“ O ye who believe! Truly, among your wives
and your children are (some that are) enemies
to yourselves: so beware of them! But if ye
forgive and overlook, and cover up (their faults),
verily God is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.

Your riches and your children may be but a trial:

but in the Presence of God, is the highest
Reward.”
(Surat al-Taghabun 64:14-15)

Allah loves:
 Those who do good deeds ( Surat al-Baqarah
2:195)
 Those who ask Him for forgiveness (Surat al-
Baqarah 2:222)
 Those who purify themselves (Surat al-
Baqarah 2:222)
 Those who are Allah-fearing (Surat Al-„Imran
3:76)
 Those who are steadfast (Surat Al-„Imran
3:146)
 Those who trust Him (Surat Al- „Imran 3:159)
 Those who act justly (Surat al-Maida 5:42)
 Those who strive for His cause (Surat al-Saff
61:4)
 Those who follow His Prophet (Surat Al-
„Imran 3:31)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 21

PART II

GREEN HOUSE

My school made a green house in front of the

teachers’ office. The person who was appointed to be
responsible for that green house put many plants and
some birds in the green house. He also put in some food
for the birds. He put the food in several places in order
that those birds could find and get the food by
themselves as they wish.
Some teachers like to sit in front of the teachers’
office to see and enjoy the scene in the green house. But I
noticed that those birds were very confused, flying from
one corner to other corners of the green house to look for
food. They were unable to find their food easily because
they did not know where the food was put by the man
who is responsible for that green house. I was asked by
one of my friends who was also sitting in front of the
teacher’s office “What do you learn from it?” I said that
Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 22
we were like those birds when we have not found the
places where our food is. We can go crazy too if we
cannot find our food, in fact Allah has already provided
our food, but we must find it by ourselves. To get our
food, we must find the places where Allah puts our food.
And to be able to find those places, we must have the
knowledge to do it.
The Creator always thinks of the needs of His
creations, and always cares for them with great love. But
we often think negatively about Him when we do not
have the food. If we see deeply into what is happening to
us, the problem is our own. We are often impatient when
we are learning the knowledge about how to get our
food. Many people even become greedy when they find
other’s food, even thought they do not know whose food
it is. They will take the food that does not belong to
them. They do not understand that Allah has given
different food for each creation, the amount of the food is
suitable and in accord with the needs and characteristics
of each creation. So if a creation takes another’s food, it
will cause a problem for him/her because the food is not
suitable for his/her stomach. Allah has created different
characteristics of every food and every stomach of every
creation in order that every creation has enough food in
this life.
Let’s see the kinds of birds, how many birds are
there on this earth? They each have different food, such
as: insects, seeds, worms, fruits, etc. And they will work
hard to find their food provided for them because they
cannot eat the food which is not for them. If they eat
other’s, food they can get sick or die because their
digestion will have the problem because of it.
So when we eat other’s food, we can cause a
problem in ourselves, it can be a problem in our body or
in our life too. In other words, if we are having problems,

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 23

it means that it is our own fault. It is our carelessness.
Then we should check ourselves in order that we will not
repeat our mistakes anymore to stop the problem from
continuing. And to remove the problem from our bodies
or our lives, we ask the help from the Creator to cure us
by promising that we will not do it anymore. Allah will
help us……insha’Allah, He understands and forgives us
for our stupidity.

“ (saying): “Eat of the good things We have

provided for your sustenance, but commit no
excess therein, lest My Wrath should justly
descend on you: and those on whom descends
My Wrath do perish indeed!” (Surat Ta Ha 20:81)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 24

 Language Laboratory

I asked one class of my students to come to the

language laboratory to teach them “Listening” before
they had their final examination including listening and
reading. After being given some passages, I asked them
one by one about the passages to check their
understanding. I opened the microphone channel of the
appointed students when I asked them to speak so that
everyone could hear their voices. If I did not open the
channel, then others could not hear the voice.
I asked one student to answer my question, and
because she could not answer my question I threw my
question to the next student beside her. I opened the
channel of his microphone but I still left the microphone
channel of the former student open. So there were two
channels opened, but those two students did not realize

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 25

that all of the students could hear their words. And it
seems that those two students did not pay attention to me
because they were busy talking among themselves.
That’s why they could not answer the questions.
All of the other students laughed at them, hearing
their words talking about others and laughed at them
because they knew what they were doing at that time.
They felt ashamed and felt foolish.
I said that if Allah opened our lives and showed
our stupidity, our foolishness and humiliation to others
then others would surely laugh at us. That’s why we
must obey His command so that He will hide our
foolishness and we will not be ashamed. How many
mistakes have we made so far? How many times has
Allah protected us and hidden our mistakes so that we
are still respected by others?

“God loveth not that evil should be noised

abroad in public speech, except where injustice
hath been done; for God is He who hearth and
knoweth all things.

“ whether ye publish a good deed or conceal it

or cover evil with pardon, verily God doth blot
out (sins) and hath power (in the judgment of
values)
(Surat al-Nisa‟ 4:148-149)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 26

 Examinations

My students were having their final examinations.

They had to do six subjects in their final examinations.
When they finished doing the English exam, I asked
them about the materials of the exam. They said that they
were not too difficult for them. And they told me that
there was a funny story in the exam. When they told me
that there was a funny story in the exam, it means that
they could enjoy the story in the text. They could enjoy
the exam. And if they could enjoy the exam, it means
that they did not realize that they were doing the exam. If
they were not feeling nervous or distressful, they could
take the advantage from the exam such as the enjoyment
of the funny story that could make them laugh or feel
happy.
The situation above actually is the same as the
situation in our lives. We are often given an examination

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 27

from our Absolute Teacher: Allah, but we often think
that we are having problems in that case. The purpose of
being given problems is the same as when the students
are being given examinations too. The students must do
the exam in order that they can go to the higher
level/grade or to continue their study in universities. And
we are also the students of Allah, we are given the exam
in order that we can go to a higher station in this life on
this earth and also for the life in the hereafter later. If we
can enjoy our exam then we can be happy because we
can get something from our exam, and it will influence
our feeling too. It is like when the students feel happy
while they are doing the exam because they enjoy the
funny story in the text. And automatically they will not
feel nervous or frustrated in doing the exam but will have
happiness in their heart instead.

“And We shall try you until We test those

among you who strive their utmost and
persevere in patience; and We shall try your
reported (mettle)” (Surat Muhammad 47:31)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 28

 A Button of the Shirt

I was asked to become a juror in the competition of

“Story Telling” for Junior High School in my regency. It
was held at the school of SMPN 2 Pandaan. It was the
first time for me to visit that school.

There were six jurors at that time., and we were divided

into two groups to save time and allow the competition to
be run in just two days. In the first day we selected the
six best students, three from each group.

It was really so nice to listen to the students telling us

their stories, which each had a moral message in it. I felt
that I learned many lessons from them. I enjoyed being a
juror, just as much as if I too were a student. I had the
opportunity to hear the lessons as a listener, and. I had to
listen to them carefully too.

Being busy listening and then discussing with other

jurors to decide who were the six that we wanted to
select, I didn’t pay attention to my shirt. It seemed that at
that time we did not have much time to relax. We had to

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 29

eat fast, and do shalat fast too because the participants
were waiting curiously to hear the announcement from
the jurors to know the six best. After one of the jurors
gave the announcement, we went home. The next day we
would listen to the six in order to find the best of the
best.

On the way home, I found that one of my shirt buttons

was missing. I felt a little sad because if I lost one of the
shirt buttons, it means that I lost all. I must replace the
lost button with a new one, but if I could not find a
matching button, then I must replace all the buttons with
new ones.

I said to my heart it was ok, I would buy new ones. I did

not know how much they were because the shirt was a
gift from my friend.

Then the next day I went again to that school, and I

found all the chairs and tables were arranged differently
because that day one of the students would be asked by
all jurors about his or her story. Suddenly I found the
button of my shirt on the table where another juror was
sitting, happily I took it. Then I understood that whatever
belongs to us and has been given to us by Allah, it would
be with us. Allah would return it to us even it was a small
button. So now I feel no worry about what I have, Allah
gave a sign via that small button. So it is not necessary
for us to worry about our wealth, our children, our
wives/husbands, our money, our jobs or position. If
Allah gives them to us, they will be ours. If they are not
ours, just let them go. Don’t love them more than we
love Allah, they will just make us sad and give us grief.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 30

 THE FINAL EXAMINATION

Students in the twelfth grade must take final

examinations created by the government in order to be
able to graduate from senior high school in my country.
All materials of the final examination are provided by the
government, but the government also gives us some
information about the final examinations so that the
students and the teachers can prepare themselves to take
those final examinations.
Having that situation, many teachers do not agree
with those final examinations given by the government.
They do not agree that the government should use those
final examinations for making decisions about who can
pass the grade and be able to continue their study in the
universities. There are many reasons why teachers do not
agree with that rule, and even many headmasters are
worried because if there are many students unable to pass
the exams, it will endanger their jobs, their school and
also their students. The government gives the final exams
to students to verify that they have the type of knowledge

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 31

which the government believes will help to assure the
future of the students and the future of the nation. To
respond to both the needs of the people and the needs of
the country, the government must make such rules. But
when we think of the needs of ourselves only, we will be
selfish. We will think only of our own happiness, we will
complain and ask many things just to get our own
happiness, such as asking that the government eliminate
the final examinations or asking that the government give
the right to every school to make their own decisions
about which students can pass the exams. Then there are
many demonstrations from many teachers asking the
government to eliminate those exams.
And because the government does not give them
what they want, then some teachers take matters into
their own hands. In their own eyes, they believe that they
are only helping their students pass the exams, but they
are actually harming their students and harming their
country too when they give the answers of the exams to
their students or let the students cheat. Such dishonesty
would not be necessary if they would help their students
to prepare themselves by studying hard during the
process of learning.
Can we ask Allah not to give us many problems
or tests? Allah is somewhat like our government too. He
gives us the exams in order to help us be cleverer in
facing our problems and better able to survive in this life.
If we learn seriously and we always think positively
about our study then insha’Allah we are able to pass the
exams with flying colors. And the result is that we can be
happy in our lives.
Why doesn’t the government want to give the
right to every school to make decisions for letting which
students can go to the higher study? It is because there

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 32

are still many schools which do not do their teaching
duties as well as the government expects.
What would happen to the country if the
government gave the freedom to every school to make
their own exams for their students? Similarly, if we ask
Allah not to test us, and let us do whatever we like on
this earth, what will happen to this life? What will
happen to this earth?
The final exam for the students is very easy
compared to the many tests given to us by Allah. The
exams given in school give us an opportunity to learn
how to prepare for the great tests in life. Those who learn
to prepare well for the tests in school will be better
prepared for the tests in life.

"It is Allah who has created death and life so

that he may test who among you is best in deed.
And He is the All-Mighty, Oft-Forgiving". [Surat
al-Mulk 67:2]

That which is on earth we have made but as a

glittering show for the earth, in order that We
may test them - as to which of them are best in
conduct. [Surat al-Kahf 18:7]

Be sure we shall test you with something of fear

and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the
fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those
who patiently persevere, [Surat al-Baqarah
2:155]

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 33

 The Landlord

Everything on this earth and in the heavens

belongs to Allah. He creates and has power over
everything. The earth and the heavens are entirely in His
hand, that’s why He can do whatever His wisdom
chooses.
The students who live in lodging houses are
reluctant to give others permission to stay in their places
where they stay because the houses do not belong to
them. They do not have the right to let others stay there
without permission of the owner. If the students bring
their friends or their families come to visit them and they
want to stay one night or more, the students should
contact the owner and ask permission, otherwise the
owner may be angry at the students. The owner has the
power to send the students away from the lodging house
if he does not like their behavior, and that may cause
problems for other students in that house too.
The condition of those students is much the same
as our condition. We live and stay on this earth like the
Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 34
students in their lodging house. This earth is not ours.
Everything on this earth is lent to us by the Owner. And
all declare His Praises: land, water, wind, plants, animals,
etc will do everything what He commands.
When someone does not believe in Him and
never worships Him, or even ignores and mocks at Him,
they will find difficulty everywhere because this world is
all under His command. And that’s why it is not easy for
such a foolish person to survive, to find and get His
grace. But those who believe in Him, worship Him,
respect Him and serve Him will easily find and receive
His grace everywhere. Everything will serve the
believers because Allah commands all to serve the
Believers.
The owner of the lodging house will let the
students use everything in that house because the owner
provides it all to meet the needs of the students so that
the students can study and learn and be able to pass the
exam and get a high degree. If the students get a high
degree and have success in their study, the owner will be
happy too.
If we are successful in our lives, Allah will be
happy too because He has actually provided all the needs
of us. If we serve Him then we will be successful
because all will be lent to us to help us in the process of
learning in this life.

“ He is God, the Creator, the Evolver, the

Bestower of Forms (or Color). To Him belong
the Most Beautiful Names; whatever is in the
heavens and on earth, doth declare His Praises
and Glory: and He is the Exalted in Might, the
Wise.” (Surat al Hashr 59:24).

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 35

 Boss and SERVANT

“I can be a BOSS AND SERVANT, you can too. But

don’t become a boss when you are not able to give good
commands!”
“I always give good commands to do, good for all and
always good for now and in the future.”
“Can you do it like I do?”

When we pray to Allah asking for something or

someone, we may imagine we are the boss because we
are requesting that Allah to do something to fulfill our
wish. But we do not have the ability to truly know
whether our requests are really good for us or are good
for others. We do not even know if our requests are only
good for now or until in the future. We do not know
about it, but Allah knows everything. He knows what is
good for us now and in the future. So it is better to let
Him guide everything, and let Him be our Boss.

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 36

When we become His servants, we willingly do His
commands happily and truly. If we are His servants, then
we must do what our Boss requests. But when we do not
do like what He commands, then we are the
transgressors. How many times have we become the
transgressors in our life? We are not able to count it
because we often do not even realize that we are wrong.

We often use our mind to do everything, to plan

something in our life just because of our wish. When we
plan something, when we think of our needs, when we
think about our luck, our benefits then we forget about
our duties from Allah. We forget who we are. We must
remember that we are servants of Allah

When we forget or ignore our duties, or when we do not

remember who we are, we need to turn our thoughts
toward being better servants of Allah, the source of all
blessings, power and grace in this world and the next.

“The similitude of those who were charged with

the (obligations of the Mosaic Law, but who
subsequently failed in those (obligations), is
that of a donkey which carriers huge tomes (but
understands them not). Evil is the similitude of
people who falsify the Signs of God: and God
guides not people who do wrong” ( Surat al-
Jumu‟ah 62:5)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 37

 Promise

To some people, it seems that keeping a promise

is not very important. Making a promise is very easy for
everybody, but fulfilling or keeping the promise is not so
easy. Seeing how someone keeps their promise, we can
see their character. Making a promise to someone is to
give a hope to him. When he is in a difficult situation,
then a promise seems like wonderful help to him. It is
like the promise of rain given to a dry place. A promise is
really powerful, a promise can make someone come
alive. A promise can make this life worth living. Why
then do some people fail to honor their promise?
I attended a workshop for two days, and I learned
a valuable lesson as I was going home from that
workshop. I had nobody to take me home, so I decided to
take public transportation near the hotel where the
workshop was held. It was raining hard at that time.
There was a taxi coming toward me and I saw there was
only one passenger in that car. The driver asked me to
wait for two minutes because he had to take his
Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 38
passenger home. While I was waiting for that car, my
friends who were also the participants in the workshop
offered to take me home with them. I did not accept their
kind offer, I told them that I had a promise with the
driver of a taxi. Then a second offer was given by my
boss, to go home with him. I was telling my heart, that I
had a promise with another. And I had to keep that
promise. I was standing in the rain waiting for the taxi.
Actually I could have gone home with my friends or my
boss at that time and it would have been a really nice
journey in a good car. It seemed that I was a stupid
person, I could go without caring about that driver, he
did not know me well. But I was so afraid at that time. I
promised to that driver, it was the same as if I had
promised to Allah. Nobody knew about my promise, but
Allah was my witness. I was so happy that I could keep
promise to that driver, an unknown person actually.
If we keep our promise to others, then Allah
always keeps His promise to us. Allah is a Witness to
everything, even to the thoughts and feelings in the heart
or in the mind of someone. He knows everything.

“ With the help of God. He helps whom He will,

and He is Exalted in Might, Most Merciful.
(It is) the promise of God. Never does God
depart from His promise: but most men
understand not”
( Surat al-Rum 30:5-6 )

“The Evil One threatens you with poverty and

bids you to conduct unseemly. God promiseth
you His forgiveness and bounties. And God
careth for all and He knoweth all things” ( Surat
al-Baqarah 2:268 )

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 39

“Serve God and join not any partners with Him
and do good to parents, kinfolk, orphans, those
in need, neighbors who are near, neighbors who
are strangers, the companion by your side, the
wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands
possess: For God loveth not the arrogant, the
vainglorious” (Surat al-Nisa‟ 4:36)

“Ye shall surely travel from stage to stage”

(Surat al-Inshiqaq 84:19)

Lessons of Love and Wisdom 2 40