Alondra Rodriguez Medina

October 25, 2017

ENGL 1S

Realities in the US

A husband, a wife, and two kids. Sounds perfect right? Almost like it's too good to be

true. In America, to be considered the ideal family that was the correct structure of a perfect and

desiring family. In the 1950’s you would see families living in a heterosxual family with great

morals, and considered well respected. The structure of an ideal family is having a dad, mom,

and at least two kids. Today families don’t model a heterosexual family, they have their

definition of what family means to them. You see same-sex marriage and marriages of opposite

sex. It has become common today to dismiss the harsh realities that US families face today due

to all the laws and what politicians said about what needs to be done to do the “right thing”.

Important realities that US families face today are deportation, financial struggles, and inequality

defined by their families. These realities do not only affect the people being targeted, but our

country in general because one choice can have a consequence either in the long or short run.

Deportation has become a big problem and has affected many people in different ways.

Being separated and yanked from your family is a hurtful feeling that can’t be stopped. In

today’s society we have a President, Donald Trump, wanting to get rid of all the immigrants

because he feels that America needs to go back to being great again. In Donald Trump’s New

Immigration Policy and Border Details speech he states, “ We are going to get the bad ones out,

the criminals, the drug dealers, the gangs, gang members, and cartel leaders. The day is over

when they can stay in our country and wreak havoc. We are going to get them out and we are

going to get them out fast” which is important because he is saying he is basically getting rid of
all these people, yet to him they are made up of immigrants only. He is targeting immigrants just

because they risk it all to come to the US for a better life. In Robert Warren’s and Donald

Kerwin’s article Mass Deportations Would Impoverish US Families and Create Immense Social

Costs it says “Of the 7.6 million undocumented residents in the labor force, three-quarters of a

million are self-employed, having created their own jobs and in the process creating jobs for

many others”. Warren and Kerwin’s point is that these undocumented residents either have a job

or create their own. Many immigrants have been denied the opportunity to work just because

they are illegal and don’t have the skills that are needed. Donald Trump has also said before that

Mexicans are only here to steal jobs and rape us. Not all the rapings that happened has only been

committed by immigrants, but by all types of races. Undocumented residents didn’t come to take

any jobs, they came to do the jobs that White Americans have rejected to do. I know people who

have created their own jobs and not only to help themselves, but to provide jobs for other people

who are struggling as well.

Undocumented residents are more determined to follow the ‘American Dream’. We live

in a country where opportunity is for everyone. An opportunity to better our lives and seek new

chances in life. A lot of immigrants from different parts of the world come to follow the

American Dream. The American Dream is best known as getting an education and having the

opportunity to work your dream job. In Mass Deportations Would Impoverish US Families and

Create Immense Social Costs it says “A total of 1.3 million, or 13 percent of the undocumented

over age 18, have college degrees. Of those with college degrees, two-thirds, or 855,000, have

degrees in four fields: engineering, business, communications, and social sciences”. This

debunks the stereotypes of Mexicans being lazy and stealing jobs. Shows the dedication of some

immigrants who do value the opportunity of going to school and getting an education.
 Families in the US face financial struggles along with deportation. Each family has their

strength in knowing how to get the help they need in providing for their family. Economically

disadvantaged families are resourceful and more tightly connected. In Naomi Gerstel and Natalia

Sarkisian’s text it states, “According to our research using the second wave of the National

Survey of Families and Households, as Figures 1 and 2 show, Blacks and Latinos/as, both

women and men, are much more likely than Whites to share a home with extended kin: 42

percent of blacks and 37 percent of Latinos/as, but only 37 percent of Whites live within two

miles of kin”. Living in a large household is important to a family who struggles financially

because between themselves they provide for their family. They do the impossible to make sure

they have everything that they need. Latinos and Blacks are more tightly connected and have

more of a special bond due to all the hardships they face as a family.

In my hispanic family, unity is very important to us. My mom and her siblings that live

here in the US always get together on a daily and discuss how they will send money for my

grandma in Mexico. They provide money for my grandma and all the expenses that need to be

covered for her house. Whenever my grandma comes to visit us she always stays at my uncles

and my house. She takes turn and spends time with her daughters and sons family. I personally

don’t live in an extended family household, but I do know how some of my family struggles to

make ends meet. We help each other overcome any struggle and let them know that we are here

for each other. I grew up always being around my family because unity is very important to us.

We always support and fall back on each other.

Inequality is another harsh reality US families face. Back in the 1950’s, the proper way of

defining a family is being part of a nuclear family. All the single parents and divorced families

were looked down upon. Although in today’s society this isn’t a big deal, there are still families
that follow this myth. With years passing, family morality has changed and families are now

being defined by what people want. In the 1950’s, women were treated poorly and women had to

basically depend on men. In Stephanie Coontz’s reading What We Really Miss About The 1950’s

it says “Women were unable to take out loans or even credit cards in their own name. They were

excluded from juries in many states. A lack of options outside marriage led some women to

remain in desperately unhappy unions that were often not in the best interests for their children

or themselves”. Sexism was huge back then and made men feel superior to women. Marriages

were happening because women couldn’t really do anything for themselves. A lot of marriages

were unhappy and ruined due to always depending on men. Men took advantage of their

economic status and knew a woman would marry him because a women felt more financially

secured.

My dad made sure his family would not grow up in a sexism household like he did. My

dad grew up in a home where his dad would be very sexist towards my grandma. My dad would

see how my grandma would take it and wouldn’t say anything because back then that was the

way it was. Women had to listen to the man and didn’t have the liberty of deciding for

themselves. My dad was never a man who wanted his wife to be a stay at home mom and just

look after the house and kids. My dad helps my mom around the house, helps her clean, helps

her cook whenever she is tired, and helped her look after us when we were little. I also had a talk

with my dad and I still clearly remember this talk because he talked to me about becoming a

woman and how I shouldn’t let a man decide for me. He told me in spanish, “quiero que seas

una mujer de bien para que el dia de mañana te puedas defender y puedas salir adelante sin la

ayuda de nadie.” He basically told me to become a good woman and to not depend on anyone

else, but myself. I should be able to do anything I want and not let anyone bring me down.
 It is important for today’s society to give attention to these problems because they do

have effect on everyone. Living in a world where we use the “myth of the model family”

discriminates any type of family that does not live in a heterosexual family. We determine a

perfect family by this myth that portrays perfection when in reality it isn’t perfect. We are all

unique and having a family is a blessing no matter what kind of family we have. Ignoring these

harsh realities is a problem because deportation will only cause the labor to decrease and job

openings go up, yet White Americans don’t want to take on these jobs. Our economy will have a

big decrease. Also for financial struggles many families don’t have enough money to maintain

their families and families facing inequality is making us turn on each other when we should be

united.