Running head: COMMUNICATION 1

Communication
Name
Course
University Affiliation
COMMUNICATION 2

Communication plays and essential role as far as the exchange of either news or

information is concerned. To a larger extent, communication facilitates the connection that exists

between people and sometimes places. Most importantly, through communication, there is the

coexistence of language which is the acquisition and application of the complex communication

systems. In this regard, language can be effectively applied to identify or reveal a lot of things

concerning the individual who is applying it to communicate. For instance, language can be used

in the identification of some of the differences that exist between male and female as far as their

patterns of communication are concerned (Palonen & Hakkarainen, 2013,).

Needless to say, this fact has been supported by various studies which were carried out

with an intended purpose of revealing how women and men communicate differently.

Furthermore, the conducted research drew arguments on whether the pattern differences are

inherent at the time a person is born or the society is the one that influences and determines

them. This paper tends to analyze and bring out a determination of whether the existence of

different communication patterns in men and women can be innately determined (Palonen, &

Hakkarainen, 2013,).
According to Allen (2010), she believes that different patterns of communication in both

men and women are determined by the society surrounding a person. This is contrary to what

Louann (2006), argues in her book The Female Brain. According to the book, the brains of

women are hard-wired in such a way that they tend to communicate differently from those of

men. As she put it in her book, “Men will develop a serious case of brain envy.” As such, Louann

Brizendine points out that nature plays a great role in determining the patterns of communication

between both sexes. From her point of view, the communication between genders is a

predetermined condition which to a larger extent she attributes it to the hormonal difference

between men and women. Basing her facts on the concept of generalization that is rampant in the
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society, Allen differs from Brizendine arguments maintaining that the society is a significant

factor when it comes to determining the patterns of communication between men and women

(Allen, 2010).
To commence with Brizendine’s discussion, the presence of estrogen and testosterone is

one of the primary factors that separates the two genders. As a result of this biological difference,

the emotions and style at which the two sexes communicate are mostly affected. Brizendine

pinpoints that, “our distinct female and male brain operating systems are mostly compatible and

adept, but they perform and accomplish the same goals and tasks using different circuits.”

Through this statement, she intends to bring out the difference that exists between the female and

male brain. Despite the fact, that the two brains that is the male and that for the female having

the ability to do the same tasks, there is a difference in the approach that the two take in

accomplishing the task.

Conventionally, several biological studies and research projects on the various

developmental stages of the two genders have indicated a difference in the general development

as far as the subject of hormones is concerned. As such, the development of the male fetus has

been grazed by high levels of testosterone which have been linked to the killing of the brain cells

in the region of the brain that deals with communication. In this regard, the aggression and sex

part of the brain has developed more than the part that deals with communication. On the

contrary, the brain of the female infant has shown significant developments in the

communication region of the brain due to the absence of the testosterone surge. In fact, this gives

a perfect explanation of why the female babies are more concerned and interested in facial

expressions and most instances they learn to speak earlier than their male counterpart.
Due to this difference that exists in both the male and the female brain chemistries, the

resultant application and usage of language become different. Notably, the trend continues with

women finding it more appropriate and useful to apply language in communicating and
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connecting with other people more than the men. In retrospect, women are more attached to the

emotional intimacy through the obvious method of talking whereas their male counterpart view

talking as a method of relying on and obtaining information. Apparently, the sole idea of men

being less concerned with discussions or discussing on emotions through language application

but rather apply knowledge in achieving something can be envisioned during the early infant

stages of their development. That is when they are not connected with the various facial

expressions and emotions. Also, the time that they take so as to begin speaking as compared to

the females. In this regard, men are more connected through carrying out activities with and

having mutual interest whereas the women are more connected in sharing not only thoughts but

also feelings.
Basically, the difference in communication between the men and the women is also

applicable in the way each gender responds to anger. The presence of high levels of testosterone

in male and the development of the aggression part of the brain clearly explains the aggressive

nature and the willingness and readiness to fight when angry. On the other hand, females will

avoid fighting and opt for retreat and afterward she will talk to someone about her anger.

However, this does not imply that she is not in a position of showing her anger. She often prefers

using words rather than expressing her anger physically. Furthermore, Brizendine (2006) states

that “Men’s brain circuits and bodies may readily revert to a physical expression of anger fueled

by the frustration of not being able to match women’s words.” This statement lays emphasizes on

the capability of women being able to express their feelings and emotions by the use of words

than men (Brizendine, 2006).

On a personal note, I have been in a position of witnessing various cases that are directly

linked to these arguments especially patterns of communication that involve anger. For instance,

there is a time my parents had an argument, and my mother came to share with me the origin of
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the matter and how things went to an extent that there was a conflict between the two. On the

other side, my father threw some of the utensils that were on the dining table breaking them

instantly (White, 2009). To make matters worse, his actions aroused the levels of frustration in

my mother who shouted unpalatable words towards my father. Another related example, was the

one I encountered some years back when I was in High school. I happened to engage in a quarrel

with one of my classmates who was a girl. All she did was abuse me whereas her words made me

angry, I could not stand the emotional torture. As a result, I slapped her on the cheek. These two

experiences profoundly supported Brizendine’s explanation on the concept of how female and

male babies are innately born to behave in a suggested manner. Also, it supports the lexis on why

girls are fast when it comes to learning a language and highly rely on words than the boys.
Basically, stress is derived from anger. For this reason, male and female differ in the way

they respond to, react and manage stress. Most importantly, the aspect of stress between the

different genders helps us in viewing and understanding how language and communication are

used differently by both genders. Whereas men prefer not talking about their stress, women opt

to discuss their stress to a man with the hope that he will hear the problem and provide a

solution. Due to the fact that women are hard-wired to connect also, they are the emotional needs

of others; they tend to listen more than being helped (White, 2009).
Contrary to the arguments by Brizendine (2006) on women and men having an innate

acquisition of their behaviors, Allen purports that the patterns in communication are acquired or

learned from the society. Her argument is quick to illustrate the powerful nature of the society

which actually cannot be ignored. She states that “Men tend to be socialized to use language that

is valued, while the opposite usually occurs for women.” Basing on her discussions, she is quick

to bring out the picture of the treatment that male children receive which is different from that of

female children and taught on how to be assertive and less nurturing and thus they become less
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emotional. As a matter of fact, the society contributes a lot in terms of the development of social

identity and how we perceive the behaviors of others. For instance, parents play a critical role in

determining the behavior of their children especially communication styles (Brizendine, 2006).
All said and done. The patterns of communication between women and men whether

inherent or learned from the society indicates the application of language for emotional needs in

female than in male and the difference in the application when it comes to handling anger and

stress. Brizendine’s argument dwells more on the biological point of view which borrows from

the hormonal difference precisely testosterone in men and the female whereas that of Allen is

built on the society and the influence that the society towards the way that a person

communicates and his or her behavior. Even with analyzed justification from the two different

views, the necessary thing is that we should use our language styles to bring out the best in our

relationships and related activities.

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References
Allen, B. J. (2010). Difference matters: Communicating social identity. Waveland Press.
Brizendine, L. (2006). The female brain. Broadway Books.
Palonen, T., & Hakkarainen, K. (2013, April). Patterns of interaction in computersupported
learning: A social network analysis. In Fourth International Conference of the Learning
Sciences (pp. 334-339).
White, J. (2009). Taking sides: Clashing views in gender. (4th ed.). New York: McGraw Hill.