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Dads & K ids Playg roup • Page 13

J une 7–J une 20, 2018

Way To Go!

CLASS of
2018

IN THIS ISSUE:
Students Shine at Montpelier High School
Pg. 4 Taylor Street
Breaks Ground
Graduation by Sarah Davin

Pg. 7 Parklets or Parking?


G
raduation gowns are surprisingly uncomfortable to wear one guest speaker, MHS’s graduation sees several student speakers
outside. They usually come in dark colors, meaning that and performers, including student musicians and dancers. That’s
Pg. 14 LNT Presents on that beautiful summer day, these human-enveloping important to Belanger, who discussed the importance of the
tarps absorb the heat of the sun and hold it close to the human students being the main focus of the ceremony. “Our idea around
Urinetown body. Over the course of the long ceremony, as the principal reads graduation is that it is for the students,” she explains. “Our goal is
through all of the last names, from A to agonizing Z, the cap and to make a fun, memorable graduation for them. Having said that,
gown become slippery with the sensation of sweat running down they are the graduation program. They nominate their fellow
the body. students to do speeches, perform, or to read poems. It is a night
U.S. Postage PAID

that really represents our student body.”


Permit NO. 123
Montpelier, VT

With that in mind, I pass on the advice I received from a beloved


PRSRT STD
ECRWSS

teacher before my own graduation: First, if you can, bring water. Before the big day, the school staff has a lot of work to do. A
Second, If your gown is a dark color, wear more dark colors graduation committee is formed. Co-senior advisors Heather
underneath as the dye from the gown can wreck any light-colored McLane, who is also a social studies teacher, and Valerie Belanger
outfit of colors. meet with the seniors to discuss what they would like to see
But this preparation for students pales in comparison the schools’, happen at their graduation. The students nominate their student
who are essentially throwing the biggest event of the year and speakers and performers, and music teachers, Kirk Kreitz, Hilary
must get all its many moving parts in perfect alignment. That’s Goldblatt, and Molly Clark help the students prepare for their
hard enough to do for 10 people, much less the 800 expected performances, with two mandatory rehearsals prior to graduation.
attendees. Plus, Montpelier High School (MHS) has to squeeze On the day of the graduation, Tom Allen and his custodial crew
it all into a budget of $4,200, which will cover the costs of the will be in overdrive, setting up chairs, bleachers, and the music
diplomas, chair rentals, sound system services, and printing section; arranging the flowers on the stage—many donated from
programs from parents’ gardens—not to mention tackling the immense
Leading the effort is Valerie Belanger, the administrative assistant clean up afterward. (If you wish to donate flowers to decorate the
and co-senior advisor of MHS. This will be her 19th year stage this year, please email Valerie Belanger at valerie@mpsvt.
planning graduations at the high school, and 87 students will org).
Montpelier, VT 05601

cross the stage to receive diplomas—outdoors on the sports field The planning doesn’t end with the graduation ceremony itself. In
if the weather permits or indoors in the gym—at MHS on Friday, the days leading up to graduation, seniors take part in events like
June 15th, at 5 pm. The ceremony will last until 6:45 pm, granted Senior Breakfast, an awards assembly, and a school-wide picnic.
P.O. Box 1143

that the length of graduation depends somewhat on the duration After graduation, the seniors will be going on their Project Grad
The Bridge

of the speeches and performances. trip—this year to Spare Time Entertainment in Colchester. Once
Indeed, the perfomances are part of what makes a graduation at there, seniors can spend the night bowling, getting massages and
MHS unique. Unlike a majority of graduations, which feature Continued on Page 5

We’re online! montpelierbridge.com or vtbridge.com


PAG E 2 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Nature Watch by Nona Estrin

Time for Babies

B
irds catch my eye; a robin, beak-full, flies by;
great crested flycatchers are active in the canopy,
“Wrrreeep! Wrrreep!” It’s baby bird month! Baby
animals too! Everywhere, the business is raising young,
be it birds or foxes, and with birds, the ratio of success
is tough. Our phoebes raise two broods—eight young,
each year to get a couple which will return from
southern Mexico next year to nest on our porch.

Watercolor by Nona Estrin


T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 3

HEARD ON THE STREET


12th Annual Carolan Festival with Montpelier being an especially high risk area. Poor People’s Campaign to Continue
June 16 marks the 12th annual Carolan Festival, held at
A week later EAB was found in Montpelier. In areas at the Vermont State House
Mallery Farm in Worcester. The day-long tribute to the famed
around Central Vermont where the presence of EAB
Here in Montpelier, Vermont’s Poor People’s Campaign:
blind Irish harper, Turlough Carolan (1670-1738), features open has been detected, including Plainfield, Groton, Calais,
“A National Call for a Moral Revival” moves into its fifth
sessions, workshops, and participatory dance and performances Williamstown, Washington, Barre, and now Montpelier,
week on June 11, 2018. During the Campaign’s “40-Day
in English and Scottish country, Irish step and Ceili, Morris, motorists may find flashing road signs reading “Don’t
Season of Action” in Vermont, the Poor People’s Campaign
waltzing. There will also be performances by Young Tradition move ash firewood beyond this point.” The greatest risk
has gathered on the steps of the Vermont State House every
Vermont Fiddleheads and harp students, with Dominique of transporting the EAB lies in the moving of firewood.
Monday since May 14. The purpose of the campaign is
Dodge; as well as Benedict Koehler, and Hilari Farrington, Check out vtinvasives.org for more information on the
to end poverty, systemic racism, the war economy and
who lead the weekly Saturday Irish trad session at Bagitos in signs and symptoms of the EAB.
ecological destruction. The campaign in Vermont acts
Montpelier. Rain or Shine. Please no dogs. Suggested Donation simultaneous with actions in 36 other states, making this a
Women Painting Women Exhibition at
$10/person, $20/family national movement.
Helen Day Art Center
Go to carolanfestvt.com for more info, including a detailed On June 11, 2018, the Poor People’s Campaign in Vermont
For centuries, painting, and particularly figurative
schedule of events. carolanfestvt@gmail.com or (802) 229-9468 join the faculty of the Community Colleges of Vermont as
painting, has been dominated by the male artist, often
using women as his muse and painting her in his idealized the faculty bargain for a new contract with the Vermont
Todd the Barber Opens Studio on Court Street
image of young, beautiful, passive and sensual. State College system. A rally to support the CCV faculty
Former chief stylist of Myles Court, Todd Wheeler, has gone will begin at the offices of the Vermont State College system
solo and opened his own salon at 17 Court Street. Although Inspired by the #MeToo Movement, a new exhibition, at 575 Stone Cutters Way in Montpelier beginning at 1:30
he’s only been in Montpelier for three years, his experience Reclamation, at the Helen Day Art Center in Stowe seeks pm. Then at 2 pm, the rally participants will march to the
as a master level barber stretches more than 30. Trained by to contribute to righting the course of our history by Vermont State House for the second half of the rally, which
his father David, barber to the stars in Hollywood (check claiming artspace for women and reclaiming their image. begins at 2:30 pm. Poor People’s Campaign spokesperson
out the photo of his dad snipping Robert De Niro and It also celebrates the power and achievement of this group Ed Koopercamp said the general theme of the rally can be
Leonardo Dicaprio), Todd specializes in men’s haircuts and of exceptional artists. expressed in these words, “Everybody’s got a right to live–
customizing a look unique to the client as well as offering old The exhibition features nationally-acclaimed, living wages, guaranteed income, housing, and education.”
school shaving. The shop is open Thursday to Tuesday, and contemporary figurative women artists—including On June 18 at 2 pm. the final Vermont action of the 40-
cuts begin at $15. thebarbertodd.com. Hung Lui, Margaret Bowland, Aleah Chapin, Lee Price, Day “Season of Action” will once again take place on the
Colleen Barry—painting women from their perspective, Vermont State House steps.
Emerald Ash Borer Quarantine reclaiming and transforming the way women are
Shortly after publication of “Dot's Beat” alerting our portrayed. For more information, please see:
community to the threat of the Emerald Ash Borer (EAB), National: poorpeoplescampign.org;
The exhibition, curated by August Burns and Diane Vermont: poorpeoplescampaignvt.org;
the State of Vermont was put under an EAB quarantine, Feissel, runs June 15–September 8. Facebook: facebook.com/VTPPC/

Bridge Community Media, Inc.


P.O. Box 1143, Montpelier, VT 05601 / Ph: 802-223-5112
Editor & Publisher: Nat Frothingham Editorial: 223-5112, ext. 14
Managing Editor: Mike Dunphy mdunphy@montpelierbridge.com
Copy Editor: Larry Floersch Location: The Bridge office is located at the
Layout, Calendar Editor: Marichel Vaught Vermont College of Fine Arts, Stone Science Hall.
Proofreader, Calendar Editor: Sarah Davin Subscriptions: You can receive The Bridge by mail
Sales Representative: Rick McMahan for $50 a year. Make out your check to The Bridge,
Distribution: Sarah Davin, Amy Lester, and mail to The Bridge, PO Box 1143, Montpelier
Daniel Renfro VT 05601.
Board Members: Chairman Donny Osman, Jake montpelierbridge.com
Brown, Phil Dodd, Josh Fitzhugh, Irene Racz, Ivan facebook.com/thebridgenewspapervt
Shadis, Tim Simard, Ashley Witzenberger Twitter: @montpbridge
Copyright 2018 by The Bridge

Photo by Sarah Davin

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PAG E 4 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Taylor Street Breaks New Ground


by Lené Gary

M
ay 29, 2018 marked the end of clear May air by those wanting to record the One Taylor Street project,” Montpelier
a decades-long proverbial winter. this historic moment, years in the making. Mayor Anne Watson told the crowd. “It is a
Under bluebird skies, Some viewers took to standing on large day that we start to see the tangible fruits of
U.S. Senator Patrick Leahy and Gov. Phil rocks lining the edge of the parking lot to our labor—the labor of many community
Scott joined Montpelier Mayor Anne get a better view. and state and federal partners.”
Watson and many others in a jubilant Speeches were littered with moments of Watson also espoused the benefits of the
groundbreaking celebration at the future nostalgia for what Montpelier has offered its center’s location for its residents, including
site of the 1 Taylor Street Project. residents, or the speaker, over the years, and the ease of access it provides to Montpelier’s
Laughter and smiles came easily as each ended on a note of hope for what this recreation path and to buses servicing St.
community members mingled with housing transit center promises the city and state’s Johnsbury and Burlington. Green Mountain
and transportation advocates and elected future. Transit General Manager Mark A. Sousa
officials. Phones were lifted high in the “Today we celebrate a major milestone for also spoke, focusing on how the partnership
between GMT and the City of Montpelier
will benefit Central Vermonters.
The collaborative energy and shared sense
of joy between Kathy Beyer, Vice President Mayor Anne Watson. Photos by Lené Gary
for Development at Housing Vermont
The morning’s celebration concluded with
and Eileen Peltier, Executive Director of
a jovial hard hat-shovel dig by the most
Downstreet Housing and Community
prominent parties in bringing this project
Development, was unmistakable. “At One
to fruition. As the festivities wound down,
Taylor Street,” she said, “our residents will
the breeze picked up. The scent of lilacs
be able to have a choice to hop on the bus, to
still in bloom sifted gently through a crowd
hop on their bike or drive their car, or even
reluctant to let go of this one fine moment
walk to work."
marking the beginning of a new chapter for
Montpelier.

Includes from left to right: Sen. Patrick Leahy, Gov. Phil Scott, and Mayor Anne Watson

City Manager Bill Fraser


T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 5

Thanking Our Readers and Students Shine at Montpelier High


Friends Who Have Been in School Graduation Continued from Page 1
Touch by Nat Frothingham henna tattoos, playing laser tag, and watching a hypnotist show, returning home by
school bus at 5 am. The school hopes it will be a night to remember.
Belanger thanks the support from parents to make this years Project Grad especially
A s part of our April 19 issue,
I wrote a few words about
the rather remarkable grassroots
exciting. She said, “The Project Grad committee has been hard at work fundraising,
and through the efforts of our community parents made a lot of wonderful donations
history of The Bridge. Then I and support.”
went on to describe what I’m Often, graduation is framed as the last step in a four-year journey through high
feeling as I leave the paper. school. This is true, but it is also the beginning of a new path, whatever it may be,
Now, 40 to 50 days after I for all the seniors. “They have a lot of talent to share,” reflected Belanger, “and we’ll
wrote about the paper and why see some of that talent at graduation.” As these students disperse, hopefully they will
we felt we needed a paper, how fondly remember their time at Montpelier High School.
it started, how it sometimes
lurched–even staggered–
forward but stayed alive, I’m
still hearing from people on
the street, sometimes perfect
strangers, or by phone, or in notes, cards, letters–often thanking me–but really
thanking everyone who has worked here, written for us, printed and delivered the paper,
and made it happen over and over again.
We have all heard about that tree that fell in the forest and no-one saw it fall or heard
it fall. Then comes the follow-up question: “Was there a tree in the forest and did it
ever fall?”
Henry David Thoreau wrote that the great mass of men lead lives of “quiet desperation.”
I don’t think that ought to be our fate. And to the extent that we can be alive
and measure each day by the intensity of what surrounds us and what’s beautiful,
mysterious, or enchanting about our lives and prospect in this world–to that extent the
tree did grow in the forest, did put out leaves, did make a mark, and did gloriously fall.
The earliest mission of The Bridge was to celebrate the life and diversity of Montpelier.
We need to celebrate that life and diversity–if someone has ever overcome a disability,
or won an Olympic gold medal, or conquered mathematics (that was always the hardest
subject in school), or started an orchestra or a theater or dance company, or written
a novel, or taken a chance and succeeded on a risky mission, or even confronted
something in the world that wrong and needed to be made right. If none of these things
matter or get noticed, did they ever happen?
To conclude, let me thank everyone who has been in touch or in many other quite
diverse ways has made The Bridge what it is today and what perhaps it can become
tomorrow.

Writing Workshop
Clearing the Hurdles:
Overcome the 15 Stumbling
Blocks that Threaten
Writing Careers
Wednesday, June 13, 2018, 7 pm at Kellogg-Hubbard Library
With Mike Dunphy, Editor in Chief of The Bridge and
writing instructor at the Gotham Writers Workshop.
For many aspiring writers, it’s not a lack of talent that keeps
careers from getting off the ground, but a series of stumbling
blocks that inexperienced writers inevitably trip over.
In this workshop, Mike will identify 15 of these and show
attendees how to navigate or avoid them altogether. Attendees
will also learn a few tricks of the trade to both improve their
general writing abilities and persuade publications to print
(and pay for) their work.
The session begins with a writing exercise, which will be
used throughout, so be sure to bring analog or digital writing
materials. NO REGISTRATION REQUIRED.
PAG E 6 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

A Message From City Hall


This page was paid for by the City of Montpelier.

Spring into Action! by William Fraser, City Manager

T
he whole city is still settling down TIF district will allow the city to make public • Having a thoughtfully planned and built • Complete wayfinding sign project
after the whirlwind of activity during infrastructure improvements which allow for environment • Work with State and Rail to plan for a
Mayfest (May 5–6). That weekend has private development investment. • Promoting public health and safety commuter rail
become the annual rite for Montpelier to cast Several people have inquired whether • Operating a responsive and responsible city • Prioritize non-fossil fuel based vehicles in
off the winter gloom and show itself off. Green approval of the TIF district means that the government equipment plan
Up Day, the first outdoor farmers market, city is committed to any particular project or Several concepts were incorporated into those • Develop a policy and strategy for
Langdon Street bike swap, Montbeerlier, All expenditure, usually asked in the context of overarching strategic outcomes. implementing body-worn cameras in
Species Day and more. The Capital City the proposed Hampton Inn hotel and parking Montpelier Police Department
Classic Ultimate Frisbee Tournament and the Prior to the workshop dates, the Staff • Encourage more resident engagement with
garage. The answer is no. TIF is a financing Leadership Team had identified and prioritized
Montpelier High School prom even found tool which may be used when appropriate. government
their way into the flurry of events. key projects and efforts from their perspective. • Revise the investment policy to align with
Any projects funded within the TIF program During the daytime on the 22nd, the staff
Since then, the good weather has brought will be considered independently. In almost all shared values
team aligned their proposed work with the
many people outdoors engaging in all sorts of those projects, city bonding will be required overall strategic outcomes of the Council. The Finally, the group identified six issues which
of activities like gardening, running, cycling, and, therefore, such items will be brought staff also raised key issues for the Council to require decisions during the budget process:
shopping and mowing lawns. Just like the before the voters for consideration. consider. Finally, the staff drafted a mission • Police staffing and training
community at large, city government activity Infrastructure Maintenance Work– statement which combined elements of the • Replacement of aging Fire Department
picks up the pace as the weather improves. Consistent with the City Council’s recent branding exercise done by Montpelier Alive vehicles
This year will be exceptionally busy on many emphasis on infrastructure funding, our and a series of organizational values created a • Street light replacement
fronts. Department of Public Works will be quite couple of years ago. • ADA transition
One Taylor Street – The official ground active again this summer. That statement, “Serving Montpelier with • Facility management
breaking ceremony for the One Taylor Street Water lines on Main Street and Lague Drive integrity is our CRAFT,” was later approved • Completion of Community Service
project was held on May 29. Construction will be repaired. The Main Street line has by the Council. CRAFT is an acronym for the Department integration and staffing
work will begin in earnest this summer with been particularly troublesome in recent years organizational values Competence, Respect, The group also formally acknowledged five
an expected completion date of Fall 2019. causing school closures and damage to nearby Accountability, Fairness, and Teamwork. key decisions that will be on the council’s
This project includes a new Transit Center, 30 residents. agenda this year in advance of the budget
units of affordable housing, a new multi-use The evening of the 22nd was spent with
Major contracted sidewalk projects will be the Council and staff pulling key elements process:
path and bridge over the North Branch River
and redevelopment of Main Street in the area underway on College Street and Liberty Street of the strategic plan together. In addition to • Recreation Center Feasibility Study and
which now houses Montpelier Beverage. in conjunction with paving work. There will the mission statement and values, the Council future of 55 Barre St.
be several other smaller sidewalk projects assigned work to the various strategic areas. • Central Vermont Public Safety Authority –
Concerns have been expressed about the loss around town as well. Sidewalk projects on The Council also preliminarily identified go or no go
of the Montpelier Beverage business as part First Avenue, Tracy Street, and Tremont street priority items. These priorities may change • Short and long term parking strategies
of this project. City officials understand this will be completed by DPW crews. when the Council formally adopts the plan but • New hotel and parking garage
impact and worked very diligently with the for now they are: • Water Resource Recovery Facility (WRRF)
property owner and business owner to find Primary road maintenance efforts this year
will be on Lague Drive, College Street, Liberty Top Priority upgrade
an alternate location. After nearly two years of
searching, no suitable location with financially Street, Sherwood Drive and River Street. • Review intended outcomes of the Economic The next steps are that staff is creating
feasible lease rate was found. The business Sections of Routes 2 & 302 approaching Development Strategic Plan (EDSP) specific work plans for each outcome area
owner made the decision to keep relocation the roundabout will also be improved. and ensure that economic development and priority activity. The city will also be
funds as a business buyout rather than open The Northfield Street water and sewer line outcomes are properly aligned with tools using a new tracking software system called
a new space. replacement and road reconstruction project and strategies. Envisio which will follow the strategic plan
will continue through this summer to the City • Develop a plan for implementing a livable and provide a public dashboard for all to
Taylor Street – In addition to the One Taylor line. see progress. A first draft of the plan will
Street development project, Taylor Street itself wage requirement in Montpelier
Replacement of the Cummings Street Bridge • Develop resilient designs and standards for be before the Council on June 13, approval
will be reconstructed with a new streetscape. of a final plan is expected on June 27. The
The first signs of this work were the recently will begin this summer as well. addressing stormwater issues
• Consider non-citizen voting charter change Envisio software implementation will begin
completed improvements to the rail crossing. Strategic Planning – The City Council and in July with the public dashboard expected
leadership staff recently engaged in a two day • Increase parkland and recreational play
Caledonia Spirits – The city, state, railroad areas throughout the city for November. The full detailed report of this
and Caledonia Spirits have resolved a major strategic planning session to establish priorities Strategic Planning process will be posted on
and a work plan for the near future. A goals • Develop a strategy to address housing
issue related to rail crossing which clears the shortage and ensure housing for all incomes line. The process was led by Julia Novak of
way for construction of the new distillery and setting process has been in place for many the Novak Consulting Group who specialize
years. With three new council members, two and stage of life
showroom on Barre Street. We don’t have an • Update city ordinances to ensure in municipal government work.
exact date from the company but expectations council members in their first year and a new
mayor; however, we decided that a more full enforceability and develop strategies to I must acknowledge that this page would
are that work will begin within the next couple ensure compliance. Unenforced ordinances not be here if not for the partnership the
of months. blown effort was important to capture the
policy direction of this group. should be eliminated or modified. city has had with Nat Frothingham and The
Shared Use Path – More commonly known High Priority Bridge for many years. Nat took a chance
as a bike path. The path segment running Council workshops were held on the evenings on including paid city “propaganda” in this
from Granite Street to Gallison Hill Road has of May 21 and 22. The evening of the 21st • Incentivize landlords to fill storefronts paper. I appreciate his decision and hope
met all requirements and received all permits. consisted of just the council discussing their • Develop a comprehensive strategy for that it has been beneficial for The Bridge, the
The project is currently out to bid and will roles, styles, group norms and perspectives. achieving net zero goals city government and, most of all, Montpelier
begin work in July. Some of the work will That evening ended with the Council • Make tenant rights more apparent – residents. Speaking personally, I appreciate
be done in conjunction with the Caledonia identifying eight strategic outcomes for the clearinghouse with info on who to call and Nat’s love for Montpelier and his tireless
Spirits project. This is a two-season project community and organization. what is not allowed. dedication in holding The Bridge together.
which means that the path will be open for • Improving community prosperity • Address deferred maintenance to achieve He will be missed.
use in 2019. • Exercising good environmental stewardship steady state for municipal infrastructure
• Approve a plan for housing in Sabin’s Thanks for reading this article and for your
TIF – The City Council approved an • Maintaining sustainable infrastructure interest in Montpelier city government. Please
improvements Pasture
application for a Tax Increment Financing share any questions, comments, or concerns
(TIF) District at their last meeting. The • Creating an inclusive, equitable and Other priorities with me at wfraser@montpelier-vt.org or
application will be reviewed by the Vermont welcoming community • Host racial and social justice workshops (802) 223-9502.
Economic Progress Council. If approved, the • Developing more housing • Establish a racial and social justice committee
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 7

Parklets or Parking? Which Brings More to Montpelier?


by Mike Dunphy

W
hen the first planks for a new success of the parklets, with no formal impact
parklet were laid down outside studies planned after the parklet season ends
Down Home Kitchen on Langdon in October. The same approach was used to
Street, Montpelier began to buzz over the assess the Positive Pie parklet, too, as Fraser
wisdom of such a venture. While critics chafed explains. “It was measured strictly in the eyes
at the loss of parking spaces, alleged minimal of the beholder. The council felt that in their
notification, and traffic issues, others cheered view, based on feedback that they’d received
the move as something new and vibrant, based and their observations, that they hadn’t been
on the philosophy that it’s people that make a disruptive to downtown in any way, that it
downtown vibrant, not parking. Or as urban had created the type of vitality that they had
activist Jane Jacobs once noted, “Not TV or wanted.”
illegal drugs but the automobile has been the For Groberg, the spillover business shouldn’t
chief destroyer of American communities.” be the only measurement of the parklets’
It’s a philosophy shared by Down Home success. “I think we need to measure it in a
Kitchen owner, Mary Alice Proffitt, who told variety of ways, and one of those ways is the
the City Council during a public hearing on sales of adjoining businesses, but I think it is
May 9, “Sometimes you have to sacrifice a few also important to look at the contribution to
parking spots to do something creative and the overall vibrancy of downtown and energy
exciting that draws people into your downtown on the street.”
to spend money, and not just to go to a chain restaurant in Williston or a bar in Waterbury.” Whichever side people fall on the debate, nearly all those involved do agree some revision of
For others, such as Yvonne Baab, the owner of Global Gifts, removing the three parking the process and the ordinance is in order. “From my perspective,” Fraser says, “process wise,
spots on an already tight street is not the right approach. “The idea of increasing a business’s we could do a lot of things differently and improve, definitely more notice, more publicity
area by taking up public space that is needed, in this case for parking, I am just opposed to about the process, . . . some sort of permit process perhaps. The biggest criticism we heard
that,” she told the Council, also noting the short notice. “I really think it is unfair that we about was no notice.” Roberts agrees, saying, “I do wish city council would review their
are not given notice to have a say on how this going to impact us.” policies regarding the number of parklets per business, their duration, and the minimum
Wherever your sympathies lie, the goal of all is the same: to bring more life—and therefore requirements prior to the approval and construction process.”
business dollars—to downtown. The question is what can do that better? More parking “When the council adopted the ordinance,” city council member Rosie Krueger adds, “there
spaces or parklets? was also some discussion about whether to limit more specifically where parklets could go,
Impact studies of parklets in Philadelphia and San Francisco, where parklets first appeared, how many in a row, and so forth, however, the general feeling at the time was that future
lean in their favor. A 2011 Parklet Impact Study by San Francisco Great Streets Project councils could make those judgments on a case-by-case basis when the applications came
studied the influence of parklets at three locations—Valencia Street in the Mission district, in. However, when this application came before the council, it seemed like some council
Stockton Street in North Beach, and Polk Street in Polk Gulch—on pedestrian traffic, members felt they couldn’t really oppose it, because there weren’t any standards in the
behavior, and perception before and after each was installed. ordinance against which the council could consider the application. This indicates that the
ordinance language needs some more work before future applications occur.”
Among the key findings was that average foot traffic on Stockton Street increased 44 percent
after the parklet was installed (but remained more or less the same on the other two streets). Another aspect that could be changed going forward is assessing the cost of the parking
However, the number of people stopping to engage in “stationary activities” significantly spaces, which is currently based on the cost of taking up the space for a full day—$810 per
increased at all three locations. While only one of the seven businesses that replied to the space for the 27 weeks, from May 1 to November 8. Multiply that by three—the number of
survey observed that customer levels had increased after the parklet was installed, none saw spaces of the Down Home parklet—and it nonetheless doesn’t seem like peanuts, especially
a decrease. considering the thousands of dollars Proffitt invested in the construction of the Down Home
parklet itself, plus wages for the staff to work and maintain it.
A 2013 study in Philadelphia by University City District, a nonprofit neighborhood
development organization, witnessed even greater benefits, noting “the sales impact [on That investment by a private business should be noted, says Sarah DeFelice of Bailey Road
nearby businesses] of the parklet was substantial: following the introduction of the parklets, on Main Street. “Businesses that are investing in making the street look as good as parklets
sales were up by 20 percent.” make them look, they need to be allowed to try that. It’s not like she’s expanding at will.
She’s investing.” However, DeFelice concedes, “If businesses surrounding that business find
But of course, Montpelier isn’t San Francisco or Philadelphia, where there are a plethora their sales are down 20 percent, 30 percent, and it’s really hurting, that has to be part of the
of parking alternatives and significant public transport systems. Plus, the median age in conversation.”
Montpelier skews much higher, making mobility difficulties an issue for many. Families
with small children also suffer additional stress from trying to find parking near the The question over the public versus the private parklet also remains contentious. As City
destination. Perhaps most importantly, as City Manager Bill Fraser notes, “Our businesses Councilor Rosie Krueger pointed out, “I voted against the parklet ordinance when the
can’t survive on just Montpelier residents,” so parking accommodations for those driving council passed it this winter because I am uncomfortable with the idea of taking a public
into Montpelier is indeed important. asset and allowing a private business to restrict access to it on a semi-permanent basis. I have
no problem with public parklets . . . I would be happy to support that.” Baab shares that
Thankfully, with the legislature out of town and schools closing for the summer, the parking opinion. “If it were open to the public all day long and took one parking space on the street,
crunch is significantly reduced in the summer, creating an ideal opportunity to experiment I could see that being beneficial, but not the way it is now.”
with the parklet, especially after the positive reaction to the Positive Pie parklet on State
Street. The city passed the ordinance March 18, allowing for six parking spaces total. Down One argument against public parklets might be the current state of Montpelier’s “Pocket
Home Kitchen was application number one, and it was approved in mid-May by a 4-2 vote, Park,” where the difficulties of upkeep—and generating the funds to support it regularly—
with councilors Rosie Krueger and Glen Coburn Hutcheson objecting. are becoming apparent in its progressive shabbiness. “My personal preference would be
that they are all public parklets,” Fraser notes, “but I say that with a caveat . . . that they be
The parklets are supported by Montpelier Alive, which first floated the idea of parklets maintained and done right. However, the economics for a lot of these projects are very tight,
several years ago. “I know it can be challenging to find parking downtown,” executive so often times you are trying to blend some public and private resources to do some of these
director Dan Groberg reflects, “but our hope is that by turning over a limited number of projects.”
spaces, we can really enhance the vibrancy of downtown and bring a great atmosphere out
onto the streets.” For Groberg, he hopes the experience of shopping downtown, parklets included, outweighs
these challenges to parking. “Part of shopping downtown is that you might not be able to
Based on his observation, it seems to be working. “I was at the Down Home parklet over the find a spot directly in front of the store you want to go to, but we offer such unique boutiques
weekend, and there were families enjoying free creemees and parents having drinks out in and great dining that we encourage people to come downtown anyway and park on one of
the parklet, and it was a really great atmosphere,” Groberg said. the residential streets or the public lots. It is a different experience than shopping at a big box
But is it creating spillover customers for surrounding businesses? Because the Down Home store, where you might be able to park right in front.”
parklet has only been open a short time, it’s probably too early to say, but Kipp Roberts, co- That may be true, but as Fraser points out. “Parking is the first and last impression somebody
owner of Onion River Outdoors next door did note, “We did see a lot of traffic down that has of your community. Is it easy to use? Is it friendly? Can you find a space? Is the pay
way over the holiday weekend, and I know there were some folks in here with Down Home system easy? Was the experience a good experience for you? It can make a difference.”
creemees, but it’s hard to say whether or not these folks would have come our way anyways.”
For now, the experiment goes forward, with decisions about increasing or reducing spaces for
Indeed, anecdotal evidence is currently the only measurement in place to determine the parklets put off until after the season. As Fraser notes, “Let’s see how these six goes.”
PAG E 8 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

One Step Forward at a Time by Dot Helling

E
ach spring runners, joggers and walkers take to Start conservatively and realistically. If your goal is to
our roads to train for events like the Corporate run a marathon, work up gradually for a period of six
Cup and the Vermont City Marathon. Are you months to a year depending on how naturally running
one of them? If not, why not? I hear many reasons for or jogging comes to you. The same with walking. Don’t
not getting out there: “The weather is bad. My knees start with a 10-mile hike, start with a half mile or a
are bad. I’m too busy.” In my book, there is no excuse. half hour. Work up incrementally either by mileage or
I’ve been an athlete most of my adult life. It has not time. Take rest days in between. Talk with someone
always been easy to get out the door. Sometimes, like you know who is a successful walker, jogger, or runner
the Nike slogan, you have to “Just Do It.” about how they started. Remember that each of us is different and listen to your body.
So what does it take to get out the proverbial door to exercise? Most important is the right What may work for your friend will not necessarily work for you.
pair of shoes, which means a good fit and shoes that are not worn down or broken down Set a goal for yourself. Your goal can be meeting new people, an event, an adventure trip,
due to age and time on the shelf. A popular banker in town stopped running because of or simply to feel fitter, perhaps even lose some weight. Setting goals as well as finding
sore knees. Turns out she was running in very old, broken down shoes. Shortly after she others to exercise with provides incentive on the days when you are struggling to get
bought new ones, she was back on the road pain free. Don’t cut corners on a pair of shoes. out the door. You can find “partners in crime” by joining a group like Central Vermont
You can patch together your outfits but shoes are critical to the enjoyment of being on Runners, the Green Mountain Club, or “Walks with Harris” at the Montpelier Senior
your feet and not getting hurt. You may need to consider specialized footbeds or orthotics, Center. There are many opportunities in Central Vermont to congregate with others
particularly if you are flat-footed, in order to avoid chronic syndromes like plantar fascitis. who want company when they walk, jog or run. Find companions who match your pace
Beware if you run in Yaktrax during the winter, especially on uneven terrain, as they may and your approach. Some athletes choose to work out “on the watch” while others are
cause fascitis or other foot injury. out there to “smell the roses” while getting fit. Don't obsess about pace, time or distance.
Daily workouts and local events are not the Olympics.
If you need discipline, try counting steps with a Fitbit, or get a GPS watch that keeps
track of distance, pace and other variables. Or go to a program online that creates a
schedule to follow in reaching your goal. Personal coaches work well for some but there’s
an expense involved. The plus side to having a personal coach is that your program should
be individualized and geared to how your body is reacting to the workouts. Focus on
hydration and nutrition to give you the energy to do your workouts and the liquids and
nutrients needed to recover from them.
Pick different routes and vary your workouts. We have a myriad of trails, dirt roads and
paved courses for walking, jogging and running safely in beautiful settings. Starting out
I recommend our bike path that runs from the Taylor Street Bridge to the Junction Road.
There is also a section adjacent to Stonecutters Way which will soon extend to Gallison
Hill Road. Currently you can get up to three miles in one direction if you maneuver the
length of the existing paved path. For those who prefer dirt, the trails in Hubbard Park
and in North Branch Park are delightful, as is the Junction Road from the end of the
bike path out to Three Mile Bridge. You can go uphill via routes like North Street to an
endless mecca of dirt road loops and grids with jaw-dropping views.
While I prefer dirt, I have several “in-town favorites.” A quick after work six miler is to go
out Route 2, turn left at the Creemee Stand, cross over Three Mile Bridge, then back on
the dirt Junction Road and bike path. From town there are two eight-mile loops I love but
both involve difficult hills. First is to head out Route 12 to the base of the Wrightsville
hill, turn left on Bolduc, left on Portal, then left on Terrace with a beautiful downhill back
to town. Get off Terrace and come around through Clarendon to avoid traffic at the end
and then work your way around the Capitol.
My second favorite in-town eight miler is to go out Route 12, turn right up Gould Hill
Road to the top, then right on Sparrow Farm Road, then right again on North Street and
sail home downhill. Hang a left on Cummings if you want to add on, then head up to
Barnes or just come straight down County Road. These routes work for walkers, runners,
and joggers. During winter conditions, these routes are often more negotiable than City
streets, with less traffic. The dirt sections are easier on your knees and back.
The trails in Hubbard and North Branch parks access a system that will take you miles
and miles for hours upon hours through beauteous parts of Central Vermont. You can
access the East Montpelier trail system by running through North Branch to the top of
Gould Hill. In the winter you can run or walk the Vermont Association of Snowmobile
Travelers (VAST) trails, or else snowshoe or ski them, from Montpelier through East
Montpelier, to Worcester, and beyond. If you join your local snowmobile club, eg. The
Gully Jumpers in East Montpelier, it’s inexpensive and supports the grooming of the
trails. The Gully Jumpers section of VAST trail is user friendly to runners and walkers
with friendly sign postings for snowmobilers to be on the lookout.
Whatever approach you choose, the most important thing is to put that first foot out
the door, then another, and another. Keep stepping forward. The rewards outweigh the
effort. To help you get started, here are some links to athletic opportunities in the area:
www.cvrunners.org
www.greenmountainclub.org
www.montpelier-vt.org/297/Montpelier-Senior-Activity-Center
www.greenmountaincrossfit.com
www.onionriveroutdoors.com
www.firstinfitness.com
www.gmaa.net
www.outdoors.org
www.thegmbc.com
www.onionriver.com/events/stowe-bike-club
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 9

Editorial
Insisting on a Safe, Accessible,
24-Hour Transit Center by Nat Frothingham

H ere’s a good idea. What about a taking a moment of total


relaxation followed by a deep breath of satisfaction?
of property to be acquired. And then, of course, when it
was decided to devote the upper floors of the transit center
building to housing; there was development money to be
center itself are added up, some $7 million of federal money
will come to the City of Montpelier.
Now, let’s acknowledge all the players, the meetings, work, Given the time, given the money, given that the transit
grit, patience, and follow-through with the One Taylor assembled, architectural designs, and the like. In the final center is at, and has been, at the heart of the One Taylor
Street project—a project that includes a long-awaited and analysis there were permits to be secured before construction Street project for at least 18 years, we should insist on a
much-needed downtown Montpelier transit center, with a could begin. transit center that is accessible, safe, and achieves the goals
construction start date sometime this summer. The study, planning, clean-up, acquisition, and permit of unifying the city’s transportation alternatives.
Let’s not hit on all the obstacles that had to be surmounted in problems are now behind us and we can concentrate—and That transit center would be staffed and say to the traveling
advance of starting construction. But these were the biggies: need to concentrate—on the transit center itself. public, “You’re in Montpelier. You’re welcome here. If you
In a recent phone contact with The Bridge, City Manager In considering the transit center, these are the realities facing need information, we can supply information. If you need
Bill Fraser said his earliest memory of the One Taylor Street us: a phone, here’s a phone. If you’re sick, we can get you up to
project was a reference to a transit center in the first (city and First, the City of Montpelier will own and manage the the hospital. If it’s cold outside, you can wait inside. If you
state) Capital District Master Plan, produced in 2000. transit center. need to use a restroom, the restrooms are over there. If you’re
a child or if you’re alone or if you’re an older person and you
As imagined in the early planning stages, the transit center Second, the regional transportation provider, Green need a little help, we’re here to give it.
has always been at the heart of the One Taylor Street project. Mountain Transit, will be the primary transit center tenant
It was only later on that the One Taylor Street project added and operator. At the moment, what’s been figured out is a daytime transit
a housing element. As first described, the transit center was center. What’s not been figured out is a 24-hour (staffed and
Third, it’s true that Greyhound buses will drop off and pick accessible) downtown transit center. Those discussions need
conceived as a “Multi-modal Transit Center,” an almost up passengers at the new transit center. But Greyhound is
visionary concept. to go forward now.
under no obligation to pay for the transit center. In fact,
Why not create a transit center in downtown Montpelier according to Fraser, Greyhound is doing Montpelier a favor In 2006, there was a modest trailer situated on the Carr Lot
that would promote transportation alternatives to the private in agreeing to take on and drop off passengers in Montpelier offering a temporary bus station to passengers arriving and
automobile—alternatives such as short- and long-haul buses, when it could more easily pick up and drop off passengers departing Montpelier. As part of a 2006 story that appeared
trains, taxis, bicycles, and walking? in Berlin. in The Bridge, then bus station manager Mike Coffin has
this to say about the positive business impacts of arriving,
According to Fraser, voters in Montpelier approved an initial But here is a remaining sticking point that’s being discussed departing, and waiting passengers:
$800,000 bond with the aim of acquiring the Carr Lot by and is not yet resolved.
the Winooski River, in 2002. “You have people coming to the capital in all seasons of the
Will the new downtown Montpelier transit center be open year. I had 45 people get off the bus here at the 11:30 am
But the Carr Lot was not without its problems. Even up until 24 hours a day? And will it provide services to passengers scheduled stop on the day before Thanksgiving. The
the 1970s, the Carr Lot had been a scrap metal salvage and waiting to board the Boston-Montreal bus that stops in economic impact is a lot more than selling bus tickets.
processing yard. And before it could be converted to another Montpelier at about 3 am? And will the transit center It’s taxis, hotels, motels, and downtown merchants. I
use, it had to be cleaned up. So there were environmental accommodate passengers waiting to board at the same time have people who come in here, and they have an hour
studies, river modeling, and flood mapping with local, state, on the return trip? to kill before they get on a bus, and they will come back
and federal players. When all the costs, and these costs include the bike path, to the station with a bagful of stuff they have purchased
Even as the clock was ticking, in addition to the clean-up, a bike-pedestrian bridge over the North Branch, property downtown. What would the city do if they didn’t have a
there was a bike path to be figured out. There were bits acquisition, design, permitting—and, of course the transit bus station here?”
PAG E 10 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Why I Love My (Reel) Mower by Charles W. Johnson

N
ow that it’s getting close to the dreaded mowing season, when folks spend much 11. Takes very little more time (for our lawn: 1.25 hour by reel versus 1 hour by power).
precious free time tending their patch of lawn, I’d like to pass on some thoughts 12. Can mow in any direction, since the grass is not thrown to the side.
about the benefit and joy (well, maybe not “joy” exactly, let’s say “satisfaction”) of
using an old-fashioned reel mower—you know, the one you push that has swishing blades 13. Cheaper than power mowers (new around $100, much cheaper used).
and no motor—instead of a power one. 14. Easy to store, can lift it easily.
But before I present my list, I want to emphasize a few “musts” about using a reel mower, 15. Don't have to winterize it.
to make it effective and efficient.
16. The machine is simple and elegant.
• The grass cannot be too high, say four inches or more, otherwise you will push the grass
17. Imparts a feeling of self-reliance, before power equipment took over our lives.
over rather than cut it. Therefore, you must mow regularly, once a week in spring, less
often in summer when growing slows. 18. The task becomes (more of) a pleasure.
• You must keep the mower blades sharp. Reel mowers are self-sharpening, by reversing The only downside I see is that you still have to mow, instead of fishing, lying in your
the cogs and using lapping (grinding) compound on the blades. This is easy to do once hammock, hiking, napping, or reading a good book. But that’s a choice we make; we could
you learn how, and there are good instructional videos on YouTube. I need to sharpen the have no lawns if we wanted.
blades only once or twice a year. Anyway, I hope you’ll give it a try. It’s good for you, your home, your neighbors, and our
• I only mow as much as I can do in an hour and a half. We don’t need more lawn than environment.
that, and I don’t want to make a chore out of it.
• Get a good brand, and wide enough to cover more ground, e.g., American Lawn Mower
Company makes a nice, solid 18-inch mower.
So, with these provisos in mind, here are eighteen reasons, in no particular order, why I
prefer using my reel mower over a power one (there are probably others I haven’t thought
of, too):
1. Quiet and peaceful: Don’t need hearing protection, can talk to folks nearby in a normal
voice.
2. Good exercise, but not overly strenuous.
3. Doesn’t kill frogs, toads, snakes, moths, and other living creatures.
4. Doesn’t use gas or oil, don’t have to go out and buy them.
5. Doesn’t produce fumes or pollute the air.
6. Safer: I can mow in sandals; doesn’t throw rocks, sticks, and other projectiles.
7. Can mow when the lawn is damp, in fact it cuts better then.
8. Nicer job than a power mower: no scalped lawn, “track” marks, or clods of grass left
behind.
9. Fertilizes as it cuts: it puts all the clippings back into the lawn.
10. No repair costs: I can sharpen it myself, fix any problem, get parts easily.

Recycle This Paper!


T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 11

Deane C. Davis Outstanding Business of the Year Award

Vermont Mutual President and CEO Dan Bridge accepted the Deane C. Davis Outstanding
Business of the Year Award Thursday, May 24, 2018 at the DoubleTree by Hilton in South
Burlington, VT. This annual award honors a Vermont business that shows an outstanding
history of sustained growth while displaying an acute awareness of what makes Vermont
unique.
With Dan Bridge, from left, are Vermont Business Magazine Publisher John Boutin, Governor
Phil Scott, and Vermont Chamber President Betsy Bishop. Photo by Rick McMahan

Well Wishes
for Nat from
His Daughter,
Hannah
I
was living with Nat for a year, 25 years ago,
when the first meetings to create The Bridge
were happening. Enthused and energetic
men and women gathered at his house and
elsewhere to debate its name, its nature, what
issues it would cover, how it would run. I was
25 at the time and quite amazed that a group
of community members could not only have
the audacity and vision to dream such a thing
but could actually make it happen. It filled me
with awe, excitement, hope. Still does.
Twenty-five years on I am immensely proud
of all that my Dad has done not only in
helping to conceive and bring The Bridge to life
but in safeguarding its continuity over time.
All the nurture, leadership, passion, energy,
drive, determination, grit and sheer nose-to-
the-grindstone hard work month in month
out, year in year out. Making The Bridge
a local institution. A part of the fabric of
the community. Part of what the people of
Montpelier and Central Vermont are proud
about.
This is of course not just about the efforts of
one man. It is testament to the collective work
of a group of highly motivated, very creative,
very hard-working people and a tremendously
supportive community.
But I know of no other person who could have
built and replenished the team, encouraged
and galvanized action against the odds,
grown and nurtured business and community
connections and support, and overcome
successive challenges and obstacles, in quite
the way that my dad astonishingly has been
able to. I am a deeply proud daughter.
I hope you and he all enjoy his send off. You
all deserve to. And I wish you, The Bridge, and
all in The Bridge team a successful, bright and
exciting future.
Hannah
PAG E 12 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Advice from Dad to a Grad by Kenneth Jones

I
graduated high school a long time ago. When I graduated, there was no Internet, no family, and community? While I continually reflect on my career success as a yardstick of
cell phones, and not even cable television. Cars were just transitioning to unleaded my life accomplishments, there is no question that I look to my kids’ accomplishments as
gasoline and climate change not yet to be a public policy discussion. an even more important gauge of success.
My son, Henry, will graduate next week, and if I were clever and omniscient, I would There is another important factor that I will consider when I watch Henry march down
try to characterize how the many changes taking place in society, the economy, and the aisle to the cadence of Pomp and Circumstance. My wife and I are a part of the
the environment will translate to changes in his post-high school life. But, the fact is I recipe that has resulted in the entrée that is Henry. Our schools and community added
can’t—I don’t know where our world is headed. As a result, I have to go back to what undeniably rich and sometimes conflicting ingredients to his growth.
hasn’t changed. As some of you know, I sat on the
When I graduated, I had what I School Board for Montpelier schools
think are the common emotions with the intent of ensuring that our
of excitement and fear. Excited to schools provide the best possible
begin claiming more control of my opportunities to foster the growth of
life decisions, such as what food to our children. My strongest conclusion
eat and what time to go bed, and from those six years is the importance
more importantly, the choices of my of interactions between family
social network and a new career. The backgrounds and school experiences.
fear was based on the unknowns of Students who come with challenges
my capacities and the challenge to from their home life such as poverty,
make it on my own without the 24/7 violence, or neglect face a much
support of my parents. different educational experience from
While chatting about the future those who have had greater privilege.
with Henry has not been a regular The Montpelier schools continually
occurrence, it is clear that he faces the attempt to accommodate the
same combination of excitement and differences in family backgrounds,
fear for the same reasons. but the challenge remains largely
unmet.
My father and I had a similar
chronology. Late to marry, late to Fortunately, Montpelier has a
have children, therefore a bit older large number of families who are
than the average parent of a graduating senior. For us, the graduation of our kids comes supporting their children and the schools. I believe that strong family support makes
at the same time that we are thinking of our retirement, so we anticipate the emerging teaching and learning easier, which is an important reason for the successes of our
adulthood of our children at the same time we consider our own professional exit strategy. Montpelier students and helped me get started those many years ago.
And therefore, as a parent, the consideration of our children’s future merges with review So, it is time to pass the baton. Good luck Henry, and I hope that when it is your turn, you
of our own progress. How will our children (Henry is the youngest of our three) emerge will be looking forward to your children stepping out into the world and while recognizing
from their family-directed growth to their independently determined trajectory for career, their fear, knowing that your family did its best to set them up for success.

Rocque Long
Painting
• Insured
• 30+ years professional
experience
• local references.
802-223-0389

Thank you for


reading The Bridge!
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 13

Dads and Kids Find Community—and Play—


at the Family Center by Claire Kendall

A
ctive and engaged fathers are critical services offered. “Besides Dads Playgroup,
to strong and healthy families, and my wife and I have taken advantage of
The Family Center of Washington attending a useful parenting class, and
County in Montpelier has been pursuing we frequent other Family Center of
that mission since 2001 with its “Dads and Washington County playgroups, like the
Kids Playgroup” every Thursday evening Saturday Morning Playgroup [9:30–11 am].
from 5:30 to 7 pm. As the flier says: Based on my kid’s positive experience at
“Come to Dads Playgroup, a relaxed place the Family Center, I recommend it to all
where dads and children can eat a free young families.”
dinner and play with friends!” Because of the meet-up’s popularity,
“Dads Playgroup may seem like a simple both the Dads and Saturday Morning
thing,” the host and center’s outreach playgroups have expanded, from a school
coordinator, Christopher Robertson, calendar schedule, to run through the
explains, “but it’s so much more than summer. Some special events are planned
that. Many dads work full time and for June, July, and August, such as a
often don’t have enough time with their Summer Readers Book Giveaway, which
children. Dads and Kids Playgroup gives is scheduled for Saturday, June 23, and
dads not only a built-in ‘dad and kid time,’ Touch a Firetruck and a BBQ Night (visit
but also a chance for dads to meet other the Family Center’s Facebook page for
dads.” Fellow dad, Pete Gill agrees. “Dads specific dates.)
Playgroup has been a safe, fun place for Photo by Joann Jenkins
Robertson reflects, “In 17 years of hosting
me and my son to bond and to meet other Dads Playgroup, I’ve seen a generation
good folks in the community.” of children and dads grow up together
It’s the only ongoing, prevention-oriented and maintain friendships. It’s crazy to
community program open to all families think that my daughter, along with the
that specifically addresses positive first group of Dads Playgroup kids, are
parenting skills for fathers. Children up graduating from high school this June! At
to age six are welcome. The playgroups the Family Center, it’s always about the
intentionally create an atmosphere that family.”
includes a supportive environment for Claire Kendall is the Co-Executive Director
social connections between dads. Fathers of the Family Center of Washington County
also receive support and guidance from the
facilitator about their children’s behavior
and development, and weekly activities
that strengthen the father-child bond, such
as music, dance, cooking, and indoor gym
time.
Dad Aric Brown points out that through
coming to Dads and Kids Playgroup,
he has become aware of the many other
PAG E 14 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Monty Python Meets Les Mis in Urinetown at Lost Nation


Theater by Sarah Jane Schostack

U Urinetown
rinetown, the Musical tells you what it is. It does not hide And, after all these years, it remains current. For satire, when done
nor mask itself, but embraces its quirks, bad title and all. well, is always remembered and ideally learned from.
Originally on Broadway in 2001, Urinetown turned the by the numbers
Thank you to these writers for their satirical little monster of a
theater world on its end. Everything about it seemed to ensure a show: without it, our theater would be more predictable than 50+ costume changes in the show
flop. exciting. Thank you to this company for doing the good work to (with at least 1 onstage!)
As Little Sally and Officer Lockstock will explain to you almost honor the complexities as well as the simplicities of every character.
14 Actors playing 28 characters
as soon as the lights come up, the show had bad subject matter, Thank you to this team for their imagination in putting our own
a bad title, and so much more. Broadway was going for bigger twist on this icon. And thank you to you—for without an audience, 5 Musicians playing 8 instruments
budgets, bigger casts, and revival after revival after revival of the a comedy is an empty room of clowns laughing at their own jokes. 3 Directors
classics. Musicals were glitz, glam, and smiles. Urinetown was the I hope, with your permission of course, we will be funny, even if we
opposite. And more to the point, it was met every single night with aren’t trying to be. 2 Assistant Directors/Choreographers
uproarious laughter and applause. Sarah Jane Schostack is the director of Urinetown. Urinetown runs 5 Designers
Urinetown was a contemporary, black musical comedy, not the first until June 17 at Lost Nation Theater, with performances Thursdays– 3 Stage managers
and not the last but certainly one of the only in its time. Tackling Sundays 5 Run crew
the hypocrisy of capitalism, socialism, environmentalism, and just
about every other “ism” you can name, no one was safe from the 7 Scenic/Props technicians
wry, deadpan wit of its writers. Moreover, in our then recently post 8 Costume crew
9/11 world, it was an excuse to laugh. Standing next to happy,
400 Light cues
traditional musicals such as Mamma Mia! or Oklahoma!, it did not
shy away from the darker themes the theater was avoiding. 150 Costume pieces and glitter
Much like the first episode of Saturday Night Live! after 9/11, when
producer Lorne Michaels asked then-Mayor Rudy Guiliani “Can
we be funny?” and receiving laughter and applause, Urinetown was Photo by John Snell
funny despite and in relief of our pain. It mocked the big hits of
Chicago, West Side Story, Fiddler on the Roof, and Les Miserables as
only the underdog can. It fearlessly embraced bathroom humor as
a central plot point.
It was narrated by a slick cop and a 40-year-old woman dressed
as a savvy seven-year-old. It made absurdity its brother-in-arms
and fought the battle for laughs with a straight-faced stare, leaving
audiences wondering if the actors even thought their own work to
be humorous. Most importantly, beneath all of its irony, sarcasm,
and word play, it had a set of heart and morals only realized when
seen in its entirety. Young lovers fell in love and were torn apart by
misjudgments and insurmountable circumstances.
The morality of money versus lives was subversively questioned on
a minute-to-minute basis. The disenfranchised only rose so far and
the greedy were not entirely wrong. It was something to chew on, a Photo by John Snell
point of view lacking from the romantic comedies surrounding it.

Cody Chevrolet Congratulates


The Bridge On 25 Years of Business!
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 15

C a l e n d a r o f E ve n t s Annual Summer Sale at The Trinity the dog park. https://www.facebook.com/ Lunch at the Adamant Coop. Leave from

Community Events Community Thrift Store. See June 7 for


details.
SATURDAY, JUNE 9
events/569434556789275/. 588-2013.
SUNDAY, JUNE 10
HMC Spring Community Truckload Sale.
Morse Farm at 10 am. Contact George Plumb,
883-2313 or plumb.george@gmail.com.
Anything Goes! Slam Hosted by Geof
Events happening Hike Mt. Garfield with Green Mountain See June 8 for details. Hewitt. Participants have up to five minutes
June 7–June 23 Club. Franconia, NH. Moderate. 10 miles Plant Sale at the Old Meeting House. A
onstage to wow the judges, chosen at random
round trip. Short rock scramble below the from the audience, and take home the
variety of perennials will be sold for modest fabulous prizes! Musicians and magicians,
THURSDAY, JUNE 7 summit with extraordinary views. Contact prices. 11 am–1 pm. Old Meeting House,
Open Ears at Bagitos. Join Montpelier city Alan Paschell, 223-7044 or dreamon@ duets and choruses, and of course the single
1620 Center Rd., East Montpelier. voice of every writer. Sign up at the door by
councilor Glen Coburn Hutcheson to talk myfairpoint.net for meeting time and place.
about the city or anything else. Shape Note Singing. A participatory a 6:45 pm. Event starts at 7 pm. Highland
HMC Spring Community Truckload Sale. capella singing form. Every second Sun. from Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St.,
8:30–9:30 am. Bagitos, 28 Main Street, See June 8 for details.
Montpelier. hutcheson@montpelier-vt.org, 2-5 pm. Christ Episcopal Church, 64 State Greensboro. highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000.
839-5349. Capital City Farmers Market. Market St., Montpelier. Anyone is welcome.
vendors, music, and events. 9 am–1 pm. State WEDNESDAY, JUNE 13
Annual Summer Sale at The Trinity Documentary Film Series: The Story of Clearing the Hurdles: Overcome the 15
St., Montpelier. montpelierfarmersmarket. the Jews Author, documentary-maker and
Community Thrift Store. June 7–June 9. com Stumbling Blocks that Threaten Writing
10 am–4 pm. 137 Main St., Montpelier. Emmy-Award winner Simon Schama hosts Careers. In this workshop, Mike Dunphy
229-9155. Coffee with a Cop at the Capital City this five-part documentary series for PBS. will identify 15 of these and show attendees
Farmers' Market. With Montpelier Police Episode 5: Return: Schama examines how the how to navigate or avoid them altogether. The
Happening: A Clean Energy Revolution. Dept. Police and community members come Holocaust and the creation of Israel altered
Filmmaker James Redford embarks on a session begins with a writing exercise, which
together in an informal, neutral space to Jewish identity. Discussion follows. 5–7 pm. will be used throughout, so be sure to bring
colorful personal journey into the dawn of discuss community issues, build relationships, Montpelier Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre
the clean energy era as it creates jobs, turns writing analog or digital writing materials.
and drink coffee. Free coffee provided by St., Montpelier. 223-2518 Mike Dunphy is Editor in Chief of The Bridge
profits, and makes communities stronger and Birchgrove Baking. 9 am. Capital City
healthier across the US. “Happening” explores Jewish Literary Series (Jewish Radical and writing instructor at the Gotham Writers
Farmers Market, State St., Montpelier. Feminist: Voices From the Women’s Workshop. 7 pm. Kellogg-Hubbard Library,
issues of human resilience, social justice,
embracing the future, and finding hope for Montpelier Memory Café. Every second Sat. Liberation Movement). Joyce Antler is the 135 Main St., Montpelier. 223-3338
our survival. 7 pm. Jaquith Public Library, People with early to mid-stage memory loss Samuel Lane Professor of American Jewish HCA’s Mid-Week Movie Night. Black
122 School S.t, Marshfield. disorders, and their care partners, can come History and Culture at Brandeis University. Panther. 7 pm. Highland Center for the
together to connect and support one another Her new book is about Jewish women in the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St., Greensboro. $5
FRIDAY, JUNE 8 in a relaxed, non-judgmental atmosphere. 1970s women’s movement and how they felt suggested donation. highlandartsvt.org.
Hunger Mountain Co-op Spring Participants enjoy social time and food, as their Jewishness contributed to their activism. 533-2000.
Community Truckload Sale. June 8–10. well as activities and exercise. People living Includes a light supper. 6-7:30 pm. Beth Jacob
Save up to 65% on popular organic, natural, with memory loss and their care partners Synagogue in Montpelier. Free. THURSDAY, JUNE 14
and local products under the tent. Also great are all invited to attend. 10–11:30 am. Open Ears at Bagitos. See details on June 7.
sales happening inside the Co-op. This sale is Montpelier Senior Activity Center, 58 MONDAY, JUNE 11
Grief & Bereavement Support Group. Open First Amendment Series: The Right to
for everyone and all are welcome. 8 am–noon. Barre St., Montpelier. Liz Dodd: 229-9630. Petition the Government for a Redress of
Hunger Mountain Co-op, 623 Stone Cutters Montpeliermemorycafe.net to anyone who has experienced the death of a
loved one. Second Monday evenings, 6–7:30 pm. Grievances. Discussion with attorneys Paul
Way, Montpelier. Annual Summer Sale at The Trinity Gillies and John Franco of Vermont Law
CVHHH, 600 Granger Rd., Barre. 223-1878.
Spruce Mountain Hike with Green Community Thrift Store. See June 7 for School, Professor Peter Teachout along with
Mountain Club. 4.2 miles. A great little hike details. TUESDAY, JUNE 12 moderator, Cary Brown, Executive Director
with a beaver pond and caves to explore and Caws 4 Paws Pet Expo. Free Family Fun. Bike Montpelier to Adamant with Green of the Vermont Commission on Women. 7
a rewarding view with a fire tower at the 10 am–2 pm. At the Community Dog Mountain Club. Easy. About 13 miles. pm. Kellogg-Hubbard Library, 135 Main St.,
top. Meet at 10 am. Contact Sharon Plumb, Park in Barre Town, 70 Websterville Rd., County Road to Bliss Pond Rd. to Adamant Montpelier. 223-3338
223-2190 or sharon.plumb@gmail.com for Barre. Donations accepted and will go to Rd. to Center St. to Bliss Rd. to County Rd.,
meeting place.

For more event listings and event details visit montpelierbridge.com


PAG E 16 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Calendar of Events
Performing Arts THEATER, DANCE,
STORYTELLING, COMEDY
Through June 17: Urinetown at Lost Nation Theater. A fresh witty musical satire exploring
Bread and Puppet's Out-of-Joint Hamlet,
June 22 at the Bread and Puppet Farm

greed, corruption, love and revolution. The show imagines a world where, after a 20-year drought,
water & “water-closets” are controlled by a private mega-corporation which bribes police &
politicians to enforce its rules. Thurs.–Sat., 7:30 pm; Sat.–Sun, 2 pm. City Hall Arts Center, Main
St., Montpelier. $25–35. Student and senior discounts. 229-0492. Lostnationtheater.org
Through July 1. Bread and Puppet Presents: Grasshopper Revolution. Sundays through July 1.
Attempts to draw advice from several prominent revolutions in human history. Bread and Puppet
Museum store will be open for the public. 3 pm. Bread and Puppet Farm, Paper Maché Cathedral,
753 Heights Rd., Rt. 122, Glover. $10 suggested donation.
June 20–24: Mad as the Wind and the Sea: A Buccaneers Fantabulous Rollicking Tragic
Opera. An original Vermont musical for the family by Chris Colt, directed by Margo Whitcomb.
June 21–23, 7:30 pm, June 24, 2 pm. The Gospel Hollow, Calais Town Hall, Kent Hill Rd.,
Calais. $15; students/seniors $10. 223-1873
June 22–23: Castle on the Hill, A Tale of King Arthur. Vermont Youth Dancers (VYD). puts
their own spin on the classic legend of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. June 22,
7 pm; June 23, 2 pm. Spruce Peak Performing Arts Center, 122 Hourglass Dr., Stowe. $18–22.
sprucepeakarts.org.
June 22: Bread and Puppet Presents: Out-of-Joint-Hamlet. Reimagines the classic tale of the
indecisive Prince. 7:30 pm. Bread and Puppet Farm, Paper Maché Cathedral, 753 Heights Rd., Rt.
122, Glover. $10 suggested donation.
June 22: Bueno Comedy Showcase. A wide range of talented standup comics, from here and
away, working longer sets. 8:30 pm. Espresso Bueno, 248 N. Main St., Barre. Free/by donation.
479-0896. espressobueno.com.
June 23–24: Jerry & Ed. Leave that blinker on and move into the not-so-fast lane at Garden Acres
Retirement Community for the hilarious and heartwarming story of Jerry Atric (get it?) and his old
buddy Ed Hascomb. Sat., 7:30 pm; Sun., 3 pm. Highland Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St.,
Greensboro. highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000

Forest and see bog plants including pitcher live piano accompaniment. 7:30 pm. Highland The Crescent, N. Main St., Northfield. Free.
FRIDAY, JUNE 15 plants, labrador tea, and cotton grass, and Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St., $10 ncdnvt.org
Easy Stowe Bike with Green Mountain Club. woodland flowers including lady's slippers. www.highlandartsvt.org, highlandartsvt.org.
Bring your little ones and their bikes, or your Entrepreneur, Magician, and Motivational
Bring water, lunch and snack. Contact Phyllis 533-2000. Speaker Vinh Giang. “The Psychology of
bike and bike trailer, and we’ll explore the bike Rubenstein, 802-793-6313 or Phyllis@
path along the river. Contact Sharon Plumb, MONDAY, JUNE 18 Illusion, the Power of Perspective.” Topics
PhyllisRubensteinLaw.comcastbiz.net for include influence, perspective, goal-setting,
223-2190 or Sharon.plumb@gmail.com for meeting time and place. Writing Power: A Writing Workshop to
meeting time and place. Unleash the Writer Within Begins. Looking and creative thinking. Part of the 2018 Todd
Prayer Flag Day at Milarepa Center. Come for practical methods and techniques to Lecture Series. 7 pm. Norwich University,
New Café: Cycles of Life. Every third Friday. offer your help refreshing the prayer flags or Plumley Armory, Northfield. tls.norwich.edu
A place of comfort where we can all come overcome obstacles to creativity? Write from
simply join the center for snacks/tea and an prompts and discuss ways to leap and go Yvonne Daley Book Launch: Going Up
together to listen, talk and share about the update on center news, 1–5 pm. Milarepa
things in life’s cycle we are all experiencing in deep on the page whether you write poetry, The Country. Join author of Going Up The
Center, 1344 US-5, Barnet. nonfiction, memoir or fiction. With Laurie Country: When the Hippies, Dreamers, Freaks,
our own way now for ourselves and the earth
we live on. 11:45 am–1 pm. Twin Valley Senior Drag Ball. Dance party and drag McMillan, writer, M.Ed, Therapeutic Writing and Radicals Moved to Vermont Yvonne
Center, Rt. 2, East Montpelier. 223-3332. performances. Proceeds to Vermont Cares. 6 Specialist. 6–7:45 pm. Kellogg-Hubbard Daley and retired Historical Society curator
twinvalleyseniors@myfairpoint.net. pm. Old Labor Hall Barre. Library, 135 Main St., Montpelier, 223-3338. Jackie Calder for a talk and reading. Tom
facebook.com/events/996462597176154/. Slayton, who wrote the forward, will make an
SATURDAY, JUNE 16 $10 Suggested donation. TUESDAY, JUNE 19 introduction. 7–8 pm. Bear Pond Books, 77
Capital City Farmers Market. See Made in Vermont. Celebrate community and Main St., Montpelier. bearpondbooks.com
Film: Our Hospitality. Stars Buster Keaton, local food and beverage producers. Live music
Description on June 9. and tells the story of Willie McKay, who by the Vermont Fiddle Orchestra, lawn games, WEDNESDAY, JUNE 20
Hike Peacham with Green Mountain Club. is caught in the middle of the infamous and vendors and exhibits from artisan food Grief & Bereavement Support Group. Every
Easy. 4 to 5 miles. Hike from near Martin's Canfield-McKay feud (a satire of the real-life and beverage producers, local organizations third Wed. Open to anyone who has experienced
Pond to Peacham Bog in Groton State Hatfield-McCoy feud). Bob Merrill provides and businesses, and community partners. the death of a loved one. 10–11:30 am. CVHHH,
600 Granger Rd., Barre. Free. 223-1878.
Bike Middlesex with Green Mountain
Club. Moderately Difficult. About 18 miles.
Middlesex back roads. Rte. 2 to Brook Rd. in
Middlesex, to Middlesex Ctr., to East Hill Rd.
to Upper Terrace St., to Terrace St., to State St.
and back to the Dept. of Labor. Bring lunch.
Meet at Dept. of Labor at 10 am. Contact
George Plumb, 883-2313 or plumb.george@
gmail.com.
Just for Fun Film Series at Jaquith Public
Library. Featuring music and humor for all
ages. 6:30 pm. 122 School St., Marshfield.
Where Am I? The Power of Uniqueness.
Former Scenic America president and TED
talk lecturer Ed McMahon highlights the
importance of a sense of place and explores
why our physical surroundings are worth
caring about. A Vermont Humanities Council
Frist Wednesday Program rescheduled from
March 7. Unitarian Church, 130 Main St.,
Montpelier.
HCA’s Mid-Week Movie Night. “Phantom
Thread” 7 pm. Highland Center for the Arts,
2875 Hardwick St., Greensboro. $5 suggested
donation. highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000.
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 17

Calendar of Events Reception: June 8, 6–8 pm. Axel’s Gallery, 5

Visual Arts
Stowe St., Waterbury. 244-7801
Through June 30: Common Objects &
Uncommon Places – Paintings by Carrie
EXHIBITS Caouette-De Lallo. Acrylics on paper that
focus on common objects—meditations on
Through June 8: Resa Blatman, Trouble
the shape and color of a variety of fruit as well
in Paradise Exhibition of 17 paintings, the
as landscapes from the artist’s travels. Chelsea
artist offers up a visual commentary on climate
Library, 296 VT-110, Chelsea.
change and its increasing threat to migratory
birds and other animal species. Catamount Through June 30: New Shows at Studio Place
Arts Main Gallery, St., Johnsbury. 748-2600. Arts. 201 N. Main St., Barre. studioplacearts.
catamountarts.org. com. 479-7069
Main floor gallery: Tell Me – Artwork by
Through June 10: Vermont Landscapes. 38
19 local artists that explores language and
paintings by 19 artists, all of whom paint in
communication.
Vermont. The Lamoille County Courthouse,
Second floor gallery: Beyond Words:
154 Main St, Hyde Park. bryangallery.org
Artworks by the Book Arts Guild of
Through June 16: Passages: This open call Vermont – Books can take on a language
exhibit features the work of artists working of their own, as shown in the multimedia
in all mediums from digital image making to work of this group of artists that use shape,
traditional watercolors. Each artist responded to structure, and materials to get their message
the universal theme of Passages and interpreted across.
it with personal references and metaphors with Third floor gallery: Jack Rowell: Cultural
creative and imaginative energy. Chandler Documentarian – Photographs from 5th
Center for the Arts, 71-73 Main St., Randolph. generation Vermonter Jack Rowell’s 30+ year
Through June 16: The Front Presents SHOW career as a photographer.
25. The latest works of the gallery’s membership Through August 10: Stewards of the Land:
of Vermont-based contemporary artists. In Photography by Orah Moore. handprinted
addition, the Front will present work by guest silverprint photographs. Moore is a classically
artist Mary Admasian, a multidisciplinary artist trained fine art photographer and founding
who explores raw forms, layered spaces, and On display at The Front Gallery in Montpelier: Janet Van Fleet, Auto-da-Fé, 16x16", mixed media member of Women in Photography, a national
abstract perception. 6 Barre St., Montpelier. and oil on board, 2018 organization. Presented by Studio Place Arts.
thefrontvt.com. 552-0877. On display at Morse Block Deli, 260 N. Main
Through June 19: The Enigmatic Art of recently painted together in Jeffersonville. Bryan Dream” (1985). T.W. Wood Gallery, Barre St., St., Barre.
Endangered Alphabets. Art and woodwork, Memorial Gallery, 180 Main St., Jeffersonville. Montpelier.
June 15, 2018 – September 8: \ re-klə-
painting and typography, linguistics and bryangallery.org Through June 29: Artists to Watch Part 'mā-shən \ Contemporary figurative women
anthropology, creative design and cultural Through June 28: Tom Merwin, The Effects II. The second exhibition in a survey of artists painting women from their perspective,
preservation, ethnography and spirituality. of Bird Song on Shifting Strata. Paintings. contemporary Vermont art. Curator Ric Kasini reclaiming and transforming the way women are
Originally intended to preserve some of Vermont Supreme Court Gallery, 111 State St., Kadour, editor and publisher of Vermont Art portrayed. Reception: June 15, 5–7 pm. Helen
the world’s endangered writing systems by Montpelier. Guide, worked with six art professionals to Day Art Center, 90 Pond St., Stowe. helenday.
carving them in boards of beautiful Vermont Through June 28: Carolyn Egeli, For the Love identify artists they believe are on the verge of com
curly maple, the Alphabets have expanded to of Vermont. Paintings. Governor’s Gallery, 109 doing great things. Vermont Arts Council’s
Through Sept. 30: James Peterson,
encompass artwork, poetry, sound sculpture, State St., Montpelier. Photo ID required for Spotlight Gallery, 136 State St., Montpelier.
Dreamcatcher. Large-scale interactive
and furniture. River Arts Center, 74 Pleasant St., entry. Through June 30: Stop Motion – Paintings installation that was inspired by the magical
Morrisville. riverartsvt.org. 888-1261 and Drawings by Maiya Keck. In this series, the ice caves of Kamchatka in Siberia. The grounds
Through June 29: Ronald Slayton, Master of
Through June 24: The Russians and Friends. A Watercolor. Highlights two watercolor murals artist explores when motion ends and the work is of Spruce Peak Performing Arts Center, 122
selection of paintings by four visiting artists from “The Last Supper” (1985) and “The Hunger suspended into a sustained image for the viewer. Hourglass Dr., Stowe. helenday.com
Russia, and some of their American friends, who

Huneck. If you have dogs, bring them. Live Climb Out of the Darkness. Postpartum
THURSDAY, JUNE 21 FRIDAY, JUNE 22 music, local food, activities. Rain or shine. mood and anxiety disorders are the most
Open Ears at Bagitos. See details on June 7. Ecstatic Dance Vermont and Wordcraft Dog Mountain, 143 Parks Rd., St. Johnsbury. common complication of childbirth—
Writers & Their Mothers – A Reading. All-Stars. Celebrate diversity through dance, dogmt.com and often go undiagnosed. 10 am–1 pm.
This book brings to life the thoughts, work, music, and words in a safe and open space. All Vermont State House, Montpelier.
ages event. 6–10 pm. Christ Church, 64 State CVMC Fun Run (and Walk). Five-mile loop
loves, friendships, passions and, above all, around Berlin Pond. Prizes for top finishers in goodbeginningscentralvt.org. 595-7953
the influence of mothers upon their literary St., Montpelier. Dance $10; WORD!CRAFT
by donation. myceliumthemc. wordpress.com all age groups. $20 if received by June 20; $25 Open House at Vermont Farm and Forest
offspring from Shakespeare to the present. race day. 371-4191. Register: cvmc.org/fun-run School. Meet the educators, tour the farm
Join three contributors: Rachel Hadas, Reeve SATURDAY, JUNE 23 and forest, play games, and cook over the fire.
Lindbergh, and Martha Oliver-Smith. 7 pm. Capital City Farmers Market. See
Dog Mountain Founders Celebration Dog Description on June 9. 1–4 pm. Drift Farmstead, 324 Webster Rd.,
Highland Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick Party. Honors the lives and loves of Dog Roxbury. driftfarmsteadvt.com
St., Greensboro. highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000 Mountain’s visionaries, Stephen and Gwen

Share Your Event!


Send your calendar listings to calendar@montpelierbridge.com.
Due date for print in the next issue is June 15
PAG E 18 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Calendar of Events
Live Music
J. Willis Pratt Band. Benefit Concert for J. Willis Pratt on June 16 at Goddard Montpelier. Suggested donation at the door is sliding
College's Haybarn Theatre. scale $5-15. 426-3210
June 9: Summit School Springtime Mini-Fest and
VENUES Fundraiser. Concerts, square dancing, Cajun dancing,
and desserts, with music by Sarah Blair, Tom McKenzie,
Charlie O’s World Famous. 70 Main St. Montpelier.
Colin McCaffrey, Kick ‘Em Jenny, and Chaque Fois!
Free. 223-6820.
4–10 pm. Unitarian Church, 130 Main St., Montpelier.
Every Tues.: Karaoke with DJ Vociferous,
$20 benefits the Summit School of Traditional Music
9 pm–1 am
and Culture. summitschool.wixsite.com
June 7: Morgan Lindley (country) 9 pm
June 8: Dallas Higgins (folk) 6 pm; Drunk and In June 9: The Livelihood Music Festival. music by
The Woods (soul) 9 pm Vermont youth performers Televici and hip-hop
June 9: Juicy Conotation (funk) 9 pm group A2VT, and performances by Dave Keller (solo).
June 11: Sex Trivia 7:30 pm 5:30–9:30 pm. Montpelier High School, 5 High School
June 15: Christine Malcolm (country folk) 6 pm; Dr., Montpelier. Adults $15; students $10; $25 family
Jef Salisbury Band (blues) 9 pm up to five. Benefits Spectrum VT. facebook.com/
June 16: Mad Mt. Scramblers (bluegrass) events/442712736167938/
June 18: Nerd Trivia, 7:30 pm June 9: Two Years on Welfare, Gahlord Dewald,
June 22: Wes Hamilton (folk) 6 pm; Green Mt. Lichti/Hamilton/Dentico. An evening of Drone,
Playboys (Cajun dance) 9 pm Ambient Electronics and Free Improvised Music. 7–9
June 23: The Wormdogs, Electric Sensei (bluegrass/ pm. 1248 U.S. Route 2, East Montpelier. Suggested $5
rock) 9 pm donation. subversive.intentions@gmail.com.
Gusto's. 28 Prospect St., Barre. 476-7919. Ages 21+. June 9: Dar Williams. Noted singer-songwriter, author,
June 7: OPEN MIC, 8 pm, Free and community activist, will perform in concert. 7:30
June 8: Ted & Katie (Acoustic),5-7 pm, Free a multi-instrumentalist and vocalist and Jeanne plays fiddle pm. Chandler Center for the Arts, 71-73 Main St.,
June 8: Dirty Looks ( Rock covers) 9 pm, 21+ $5. and sings. Thick harmonies and songs of heartbreak are Randolph. 728-6464
June 9: DJ Loud, 21+, No cover, 9:30 pm their specialty. 6–8 pm. Highland Center for the Arts, 2875
Hardwick St., Greensboro. No cover, but please tip your June 9: Stephane Wrembel. Gypsy jazz. 7:30 pm. Highland
June 15: Elizabeth Renaud (acoustic) 5-7 pm, Free; Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St., Greensboro.
MIRAGE (Rock covers), 9 pm, 21+ $5 performers and servers. highlandartsvt.org, 533-2000.
highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000
June 16: DJ Loud, 21+, 9:30 pm. No cover. June 7: Northern Harmony Quartet. The quartet presents
June 22: ’80s Night with DUROC (’80s pop covers) 9pm, three northern Vermont concerts. The program features June 10: Shape Note Singing. A participatory a capella
21+ $5 traditional songs from Corsica, Georgia, Bosnia, and singing form. Every second Sun. from 2-5 pm. Christ
June 23: DJ Loud, 21+, No cover, 9:30 pm Bulgaria, and new and traditional American shape-note Episcopal Church, 64 State St., Montpelier. Anyone is
songs and Appalachian harmonies. 7:30 pm. Richmond Free welcome.
Whammy Bar. 7 pm; Fri. and Sat., Library. Suggested donation at the door is sliding scale $5-15. June 15: John Lackard Blues Band. 9 pm. Moog’s Place, 98-
7:30 pm. 31 County Rd., Calais. Thurs., Free. 426-3210 124 VT-100, Morrisville. No cover charge.
whammybar1.com.
June 7: Open Mic June 8: Northern Harmony Quartet. See descripion on June 7. June 16: J. Willis Pratt Benefit Concert. Featuring Phish’s
June 8: Brevity Thing 7:30 pm. Heartbeet Community Hall, 218 Town Farm Rd., Jon Fishman with Donna Thunder, Django Soulo, Bad Dog,
June 9: Susannah Blachley and Patti Casey Hardwick. Suggested donation at the door is sliding scale Stone Bullet, The Peter Mayhew Band , and J. Willis Pratt &
June 14: Myra Flynn and Paul Boffa $5-15. 426-3210 We’re Bionic. 6:30 pm. Haybarn Theatre, Goddard College,
June 15: Kelly Ravin and Halle Jade (singer/songwriter/ June 8. Jow Sabourin. Acoustic Dinner, Down Home Pitkin Rd., Marshfield. Donations of cash or check accepted
alt-country) Kitchen, 100 Main St., Montpelier. Free at the door to support Pratt's treatment and recovery.
June 21: Open Mic June 8. Séan McCann. McCann’s love for Newfoundland June 17: Montpelier Parks Parkapalooza. Free music series
June 22: Sky Blue Boys (Bluegrass w/Eric Lindner, Dan and Labrador folk songs shot him to international fame as in Hubbard Park. With Steady Betty. Giant slip ‘n slide and
Lindner, Carrie Cooke) a founding member of the internationally renowned group a community BBQ trailer fired up for you to grill your own
June 23: Naughty and Nice Great Big Sea. 7 pm. Spruce Peak Performing Arts Center, picnic. 3–6 pm. Hubbard Park, Montpelier. www.facebook.
122 Hourglass Dr,. Stowe. $20. sprucepeakarts.org. 760-4634 com/events/162033757820436/.
SPECIAL EVENTS June 8: The Limes. The Cabot School’s answer to School June 20: WordStage Literary Concerts Presents Higher!
Every Wed: Capital City Band on the State House Lawn. of Rock, this 18-piece original alt-pop funk orchestra Faster!! Louder!!! – An Evening of Operatic Excess.
Every Wed. through summer. Enjoy a picnic with neighbors redefines the concept of “school band.” 7:30 pm. Highland Celebrate the exciting and exhilarating virtuosity of the
or meet some new friends while enjoying this delightful Center for the Arts, 2875 Hardwick St., Greensboro. $15. human voice as displayed by seven shimmering stars from
Vermont musical tradition. Or, bring an instrument and play highlandartsvt.org. 533-2000 the world of Opera. 7:30 pm. Lost Nation Theater, 39 Main
along with the band. 7–8 pm. State House Lawn. 456-7054. St, Montpelier. $25, includes sparkling refreshments. All
June 9: Northern Harmony Quartet. See Descripion on June proceeds will benefit WordStage and Lost Nation Theater.
June 7: First Thursdays Music: Jeanne and Jim. Americana 7. 7:30 pm. Christ Church, Taplin Auditorium, 64 State St.,
duo who have been playing together for many years. Jim is lostnationtheater.org. 229-0492.
Calendar of Events
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 19

Weekly
Ukelele Group. All levels welcome. Thurs., 6–8 (downstairs at end of hallway). Free. 223-4111 or
HEALTH & WELLNESS pm. Montpelier Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre St. 522-0775.
Bone Building Exercises. Open to all ages. 223-2518.
Every Mon., Wed. and Fri. 7:30 am and 9:15 am. Weight Loss Support Group. Get help and support
Twin Valley Senior Center, 4583 U.S. Rte. 2, E. Barre Rock City Chorus. We sing songs from the on your weight loss journey every Wed., 6–7
Montpelier. Free. 223-3322. twinvalleyseniors.org. ’60s to ’80s and beyond. All songs are taught by rote pm. Giffords Conference Center, 44 S. Main St.,
ARTS & CRAFTS using word sheets, so ability to read music is not Randolph. Free. No registration required. Open to
Beaders’ Group. All levels of beading experience Tai Chi for Seniors. Led by trained volunteers. required. All ages welcome; children under 13 should all regardless of where you are in your weight loss.
welcome. Free instruction available. Come with a Advanced class: every Mon. and Fri., 1–2 p.m. come with a parent. Every Thurs., 6:30–8:30 pm.
Beginners class: Tues. and Thurs. 10–11 am. Wit’s End. Support group for parents, siblings,
project for creativity and community. Sat., 11 am–2 pm Church of the Good Shepherd, 39 Washington St., children, spouses and/or relationship partners of
The Bead Hive, Plainfield. 454-1615. Twin Valley Senior Center, 4583 U.S. Rte. 2, E. Barre.
Montpelier. Free. 223-3322. twinvalleyseniors.org. someone suffering with addiction, whether it is
Tuesday Night Knitters. Every week except for the Gamelan Rehearsals. Sun., 7–9 pm. Pratt Center, to alcohol, opiates, cocaine, heroin, marijuana or
first Tuesday of each month. All levels encouraged! Living Strong Group. Volunteer-led group. Sing Goddard College. Free. 426-3498. steven.light@jsc. something else. Every Wed., 6–8 pm. Turning Point
A small but dedicated group of knitters invite you to while exercising. Open to all seniors. Every Mon., edu. light.kathy@gmail.com. Center, 489 N. Main St., Barre. Louise: 279-6378.
share your projects, questions, and enthusiasm for 2:30–3:30 p.m. and every Fri., 2–3 pm. Montpelier
Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier. OUTDOORS National Alliance on Mental Illness VT Peer
the fiber arts! Cutler Memorial Library, Support Group. For anyone with any type of
151 High Street (US Route 2), Plainfield. 454-8504, Free. Register: 223-2518. msac@montpelier-vt.org. Walks with Joan. Easy to moderate walks around
mental health condition looking for confidential
cutlerlibrary.org. Type 2 Diabetes Self-Management Program. Montpelier for healthy exercise and conversation.
peer-led support among others living with mental
Education and support to help adults at high risk Every Tues., 10–11 am. Montpelier Senior Activity
Crafters Group. Bring your own projects, or work health issues. Every 2nd Thurs., 4–5:30 pm in
of developing type 2 diabetes adopt healthier Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier. 223-2518. 
together on projects to sell to benefit the Senior the Boardroom (basement level near cafeteria) at
Activity Center. We can all learn from each other! eating and exercise habits that can lead to weight Trash Tramps. Walk around Montpelier collecting Central VT Medical Center on Fisher Rd in Berlin.
Every Wed., noon–2 pm. Montpelier Senior Activity loss and reduced risk. Every Tues., 10:30–11:30 trash to help beautify our city. Bring gloves, other Questions: Call Nick Martin at 876-7949 ext. 102 or
Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier. 223-2518. am. Kingwood Health Center Conference Room supplies provided. Every Tues., 2–3 pm. Montpelier info@namivt.org.
(lower level), 1422 Rt. 66, Randolph. Free. Register: Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier.
Photography Club. Every Thurs., noon–1 pm. Led 728-7714. SPIRITUALITY
223-2518.
by professional photographer Linda Hogan. Great
Tai Chi for Falls Prevention. With Diane Des Bois. Christian Science Reading Room. You’re invited
chance to get and give some feedback on your work
Beginners and mixed levels welcome. 2:15 pm. Barre RECYCLING to visit the Reading Room and see what we have for
and see what others are doing. Montpelier Senior Additional Recycling. The Additional Recyclables
Area Senior Center, 131 S., Main St., #4, Barre. Free. your spiritual growth. You can borrow, purchase or
Activity Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier. 223-2518. Collection Center accepts scores of hard-to-recycle
Register: 479-9512. simply enjoy material in a quiet study room. Hours:
Drop-in River Arts Elder Art Group. Work on art, items. Mon., Wed., Fri., noon–6 pm; Third Sat., Wed.–Sat., 11 am–2 pm; Wed., 5–7:15 pm. 145 State
share techniques, and get creative with others. Bring Tai Chi Classes for All Ages. Every Tues. and 9 am–1 pm ARCC, 540 North Main St., Barre. St., Montpelier. 223-2477.
your own art supplies. For elders 60+. Every Fri., Thurs., 10–11 am. Twin Valley Senior Center, $5 per carload. 229-9383 x106. For list of accepted
Rte. 2, Blueberry Commons, E. Montpelier. Free. A Course in Miracles. A study in spiritual
10 am–noon. River Arts Center, 74 Pleasant St., items, go to cvswmd.org
223-3322. twinvalleyseniors@myfairpoint.net transformation. Group meets each Tues., 7–8 pm
Morrisville. Free. 888-1261. riverartsvt.org.
HIV Testing. Vermont CARES offers fast oral RESOURCES Christ Episcopal Church, 64 State St., Montpelier.
BICYCLING Onion River Exchange Tool Library. More than 279-1495.
testing. Wed., 2–5 pm. 29 State St., Ste. 14 (above
Open Shop Nights. Volunteer-run community bike Rite Aid), Montpelier. Free and anonymous. 100 tools both power and manual. Onion River Christian Counseling. Tues. and Thurs. Daniel Dr.,
shop: bike donations and repairs. Wed., 4–6 pm; 371-6224. vtcares.org. Exchange is located at 46 Barre Street in Montpelier. Barre. Reasonable cost. By appt. only: 479-0302.
other nights. Freeride Montpelier, 89 Barre St., Hours are Wed. and Thurs., 10 am–2 pm. For more
Prayer Meeting. Ecumenical and charismatic prayer
Montpelier. 552-3521. freeridemontpelier.org. KIDS & TEENS info. or to donate tools: 661-8959 or
meeting. Every 1st and 3rd Thurs., 6:30–8 pm.
The Basement Teen Center. Safe drop-in space info@orexchange.com.
BOOKS & WORDS 8 Daniel Dr., Barre. 479-0302
to hang out, make music, play pool, ping-pong
Lunch in a Foreign Language. Bring lunch and and board games and eat free food. All activities SOLIDARITY/IDENTITY Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults. For those
practice your language skills with neighbors. Noon– are free. Mon.–Thurs., 2–6 pm., Fridays 3–10 pm. Rainbow Umbrella of Central VT. Adult LGBTQ interested in learning about the Catholic faith, or
1 pm Mon., American Sign Language; Tues., Italian; Basement Teen Center, 39 Main St., Montpelier. group, meets the third Tuesday evening of the month current Catholics who want to learn more. Wed.,
Wed., Spanish; Thurs., French. Kellogg-Hubbard BasementTeenCenter.org at 5:45 pm. for a casual dinner at a local restaurant. 7 pm. St. Monica Church, 79 Summer St., Barre.
Library, 135 Main St., Montpelier. 223-3338. The gathering place is 58 Barre St. in Montpelier. Register: 479-3253.
Story Time and Playgroup. With Sylvia Smith for Info: RUCVTAdmin@PrideCenterVT.org
Club de Français Intermédiaire. Lecture (reading). story time and Cassie Bickford for playgroup. For Deepening Our Jewish Roots. Fun, engaging text
Conversation. Grammaire. Every Mon., ages birth–6 and their grown-ups. We follow the Friday Night Group. Social gathering of LGBTQ study and discussion on Jewish spirituality. Sun.,
12:45–2 pm. Montpelier Senior Activity Center, Twinfield Union School calendar and do not hold youth, ages 13–22. 2nd and 4th Fridays of the 4:45–6:15 pm. Yearning for Learning Center,
58 Barre St., Montpelier. 223-2518. the program the days Twinfield is closed. Wed., month, 6:30–8 pm. Free pizza and soft drinks. Montpelier. 223-0583. info@yearning4learning.org.
10–11:30 am. Jaquith Public Library, 122 School St., Supervised by LGBT adults trained by Outright
Italian Group. A fun-loving group meets to converse SPORTS & GAMES
Marshfield. Free. 426-3581. jaquithpubliclibrary.org. Vermont. Unitarian Church, Montpelier. For more
in Italian. Every Tues., 1:15–2:45 pm. Montpelier
info, email Nancy: SaddleShoes2@gmail.com Roller Derby Open Recruitment and Recreational
Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre St., Montpelier. Lego Club. Use our large Lego collection to create Practice. Central Vermont’s Wrecking Doll
223-2518.    and play. All ages. Thurs., 3–4:30 pm. Kellogg- Bowling. Rainbow Umbrella of Central Vermont,
Society invites quad skaters age 18 and up. No
Hubbard Library, 135 Main St., Montpelier. Free. an adult LGBTQ group, bowls at Twin City Lanes
BUSINESS, FINANCE, COMPUTERS, experience necessary. Equipment provided: first
223-3338. kellogghubbard.org. on Sunday afternoons twice a month. For dates and
come, first served. Sat., 5–6:30 pm. Montpelier
EDUCATION times, write to RUCVTAdmin@PrideCenterVT.org
Recreation Center, Barre St. First skate free.
One-on-One Technology Help Sessions. Free Dads & Kids Playgroup. Playtime and free dinner.
assistance to patrons needing help with their Every Thurs., 5–7 pm. For dads and their children SUPPORT centralvermontrollerderby.com.
ages birth–5. Family Center of Washington County, Turning Point Center. Safe, supportive place for
computers and other personal electronic devices.
383 Sherwood Dr., Montpelier. fcwcvt.org individuals and their families in or seeking recovery.
YOGA & MEDITATION
30 min. one-on-one sessions every Tues., 10 am– Christian Meditation Group. People of all faiths
noon. Waterbury Public Library, 28 N. Main St., Drop-in Kinder Arts Program. Innovative Daily, 10 am–5 pm. 489 North Main St., Barre.
welcome. Mon., noon–1 pm. Christ Church,
Waterbury. Free. Registration required: 244-7036. exploratory arts program with artist/instructor 479-7373.
Montpelier. 223-6043.
Kelly Holt. Age 3–5. Fri., 10:30 am–noon. River Sun.: Alchoholics Anonymous, 8:30 am.
FOOD & DRINK Arts Center, 74 Pleasant St., Morrisville. 888-1261. Tues.: Making Recovery Easier workshops, Zen Meditation. With Zen Affiliate of Vermont.
Community Meals in Montpelier. All welcome. RiverArtsVT.org. 6–7:30 pm. Wed., 6:30–7:30 pm. 174 River St., Montpelier.
Free. Wed.: Wit’s End Parent Support Group, 6 pm. Free. Call for orientation: 229-0164.
Mon.: Unitarian Church, 130 Main St., Teen Fridays. Find out about the latest teen books, Thurs.: Narcotics Anonymous, 6:30 pm.
use the gym, make art, play games and if you need Montpelier Shambhala Meditation. Group
11 am–12:30 pm Al-Anon. Help for friends and families of Alcoholics. meditation practice. Sun., 10 am–noon; Wed.,
Tues.: Bethany Church, 115 Main St., to, do your homework. Fri., 3–5 pm Jaquith Public
Library, 122 School St., Marshfield. 426-3581. Sun.: Trinity Church, 137 Main St., Montpelier 6–7 pm; learn to meditate — free instruction the 1st
11:30 am–1 pm (back door) 6:15–7:30 pm. Wed. of the month. New location: 5 State Street, 2nd
Wed.: Christ Church, 64 State St., Mad River Valley Youth Group. Sun., 7–9 pm. Tues.: Bethany Church, 115 Main St., Montpelier floor, Montpelier. info@montpeliershambhala.org,
11 am–12:30 pm Meets at various area churches. Call 497-4516 for (basement) noon–1 pm. montpelier.shambhala.org
Thurs.: Trinity Church, 137 Main St., location and information. Wed.: Bethany Church,115 Main St., Montpelier
11:30 am–1 pm Sunday Sangha: Community Ashtanga Yoga.
(basement) 7–8 pm. Sunday, 7:15–8:15 pm Mantra and Pranayama.
Fri.: St. Augustine Church, 18 Barre St., MUSIC & DANCE Thurs.: Bethany Church, 115 Main St.,
11 am–12:30 pm Saturday, 10–11:30 am. Funk N Flow Yoga. Grateful
Barre-Tones Women’s Chorus. Open rehearsal. Find Montpelier (basement) noon–1 pm Yoga, 15 State St., 3F, Montpelier. By donation.
Sun.: Last Sunday only, Bethany Church, 115 your voice with 50 other women. Mon., 7 pm. Capital Sat.: Turning Point, N. Main St., Barre, 5 pm.
Main St. (hosted by Beth Jacob Synagogue), City Grange, Rt. 12, Berlin. BarretonesVT.com. (child friendly meeting)
4:30–5:30 pm 552-3489.
Lunches for Seniors. Mon., Wed., Fri., Noon. Dance or Play with the Swinging Over 60 Band.
Sex Addicts Anonymous. Mon., 6:30 pm. Bethany
Church, 115 Main St., Montpelier. 552-3483.
Do What You Do Best.
Twin Valley Senior Center, 4583 U.S. Rt. 2, E. Danceable tunes from the 1930s to the 1960s.
Montpelier. $4 suggested donation. 223-3322. Overeaters Anonymous. Twelve-step program for
Recruiting musicians. Tues., 10:30–11:45 am. physically, emotionally and spiritually overcoming
twinvalleyseniors.org. Montpelier Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre St., overeating. Sat., 8:30–9:30 am at Episcopal Church
Feast Together or Feast To Go. All proceeds benefit Montpelier. 223-2518. of the Good Shepherd, 39 Washington St., Barre.
the Feast Senior Meal program. Tues. and Fri., Monteverdi Young Singers Chorus Rehearsal. 249-3970.
noon–1 p.m. Live music every Tues., 10:30–11:45
am. Montpelier Senior Activity Center, 58 Barre
New chorus members welcome. Wed., 4–5 pm. Mooditude Support Group. A professional and Bookkeeping · Payroll · Consulting
Montpelier. Call 229-9000 for location and more peer-led support group, not a therapy group. For
St., Montpelier. Seniors 60+ free with $5 suggested information.
donation; under 60 $7. Reservations: 262-6288 people with depression, bipolar disorder, seasonal
or FEAST@montpelier-vt.org. affective disorder, dysthymia etc.). Every Wed.,
4–5 pm. Bethany Church,115 Main St., Montpelier. 802.262.6013 evenkeelvt.com
PAG E 2 0 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Disturbances on Scribner Street by Maggie Neale

H
ow can the actual length of a was changed and accepted by Montpelier
street in Montpelier that has City Government as 340 feet for no obvious
brought me home for 23 years reason, and with no particular record.
and been maintained by the city suddenly This might seem like past history, but when
be in question, with the suggestion by the Tom McArdle, Director of Public Works, can’t
Montpelier Director of Public Works that give us a sound explanation for a notation on
the portion of the city street ends before my a City VTrans map which states that Scribner
driveway entrance? What? How can I explain Street ends before my driveway, my entrance
this when I do not understand it myself? to my home, things get really upsetting.
My deed says my small piece of land is According to my neighbor at 9 Scribner, the
bounded by Scribner Street on its western paved road in front of my home, my driveway
length. I understand that Scribner Street is and front yard belong to number 9, and
no longer traveled the whole of my eight rods, his property virtually landlocks my property.
but there has been a tree line we called the This is not what I have been contentedly
border for at least 50 years, until it was cut paying taxes on for 23 years!
a couple of years ago by the new neighbor. I am so disappointed in the lengthy process
Then last year the long-established waterway of this disturbance, the lack of appreciation
was disturbed and rechanneled into several for all the research Bruce Sargent has put
ruts in the hill east of its original home—my into discovery, and feeling outside the team
property and my easement. Thus, red flags! Photo by Maggie Neale of players at City Hall. I would like to think
What is happening on our hill? that I could be supported by my city.
Bruce Sargent went into action to discover On June 13, there will be a site visit by City
the boundaries of my property by hiring a surveyor, and we found I did own in real Council members, then a hearing as part of the regular bimonthly meeting that same
property and in easement the portion where the many ruts have been created by our evening to determine the length of Scribner Street, a determination to be made entirely
neighbor, Mark Magiera. In his research, Sargent discovered that our easement was not by the city council after hearing all evidence—the Department of Public Works, the
owned by us as real property, and the easement was not owned as real property by the surveyor, our research, maps and photographs, and all other evidence offered by the
neighbor as well. He owned it as servient property, with an overriding easement. We public. Meanwhile we are being careful not to trespass on our neighbor’s property, but if
owned the easement. he owns Scribner Street at our driveway’s entrance, that is impossible.
Sargent discovered that Scribner Street had been dedicated and accepted at 397 feet, 132 My friends, family, and associates have been asking for an explanation. This is the best I
feet of which borders the whole length of my property. This was back in 1919, when the can do when I am discouraged and humbled. My trust is shaken.
house and .4 acre was sold to Eda Berganti, who was working on the neighboring farm
at 9 Scribner. Her property, now claimed by me, has easement rights along its western Maggie Neale is a 23-year resident of 8 Scribner Street, an artist, and a board member of
border. A few months later, after Eda made her purchase, that 397 foot street length Artisans Hand.
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 21

Vermont Climate Economy: The Moment is Now by Harrison Bushnell

M
y first food was a testament to Vermont’s economy. As a baby, the story goes, until these options are as affordable as other energy sources.
my parents held me as we admired the steaming arch at our neighbors’ house. Now is the time to get creative. We have the opportunity to make solar power, wind
They took a small spoon and let me taste my first few drops of Vermont power, weatherization, electric vehicles, and other alternatives not only more affordable,
ambrosia: maple syrup. The only problem was, the syrup was so good I wouldn’t let go but more accessible. We can use the settlement money from the Volkswagen emissions
of the spoon. lawsuit and other funding mechanisms to focus on increasing the number of charging
I have grown up surrounded by reminders of Vermont’s economy. From the sweet scent stations, creating new purchase incentives, and improving consumer awareness. Only
of boiling sap, to the rumbling of chainsaws in nearby woods, to the tour busses that line when we tackle each aspect of an industry within the climate economy will we succeed.
Montpelier’s Main Street in fall just as the leaves turn, I’ve watched our natural resource- We can also focus on driving biomass adoption and enhancing our electric grid to be
based economy in action. The landscape is integral to our economy and to the happiness more flexible and efficient. Incentivizing modern wood heat and expanding smart grid
of the vast majority of Vermonters. technologies are examples of Vermont-focused initiatives that will put us at the forefront
Climate change threatens the landscape I grew up with, know, and love. Climate change of the fight against climate change, allow us to act as a leader in these sectors, and save
threatens that which I hold dear. our landscape while saving Vermonters money.
But climate change also offers an opportunity, a chance for Vermont to take a small but Most importantly, these initiatives should attract green businesses and support the
very real leadership role. It poses an opportunity for our state to show the nation and the development of green jobs across Vermont.
world what a climate economy can look like. And so it’s our job as citizens, and the job of our lawmakers and business people as
The truth is that money drives behavior. That does not mean that we are doomed to state leaders, to try to shape the Vermont economy around affordable, renewable, and
succumb to the economic barriers in combating climate change. We must efficiently and lasting options. Let this moment mark Vermont’s choice to support our economy while
effectively change the way Vermonters are able to interact with the economy. Like all protecting our natural resources, including our sweet maple syrup, for future generations.
consumers, Vermonters are unlikely to buy electric vehicles in mass until they are more Harrison Bushnell is a senior at U-32 High School. He lives in Middlesex, Vermont.
affordable than other models. The average Vermonter will not choose solar and biomass

Spotlight on Jobs THE BRIDGE SEEKS A SALES REPRESENTATIVE


DO YOU HAVE A PASSION FOR FREE, LOCAL AND INDEPENDENT
JOURNALISM IN VERMONT?

To advertise employment opportunities at The Bridge is seeking the assistance of a sales representative to help cover the Central Vermont
region, including Montpelier, Barre, Plainfield, Calais, Middlesex, Berlin, and Waterbury.
your business call 249-8666 Candidates with sales experience and contacts in the region are preferred, but we are also
open to training someone with enthusiasm, charm, creativity, and old-fashioned moxie.

CLASS A DRIVERS—MIDDLESEX We offer generous commissions on each sale and opportunity for advancement. Furthermore,
the job is part-time and flexible regarding hours.
CENTRAL TRANSPORT is looking for Class A drivers to fill open positions at our Middlesex
For more information, contact Mike Dunphy at mdunphy@montpelierbridge.com
office for daytime and overnight shifts. Daytime shifts start at $26/hr and top out at $29/hr
and offer local routes. Overnight shifts work out to 54 cents/mile with hourly rates starting
at $27/hr when not driving. Both positions are home daily, Monday through Friday and have
a $10,000 sign on bonus. Positions with Central Transport offer medical, dental and 401K
programs, driver uniforms, inspection bonuses, referral bonuses and other incentives. Our EDUCATION DIRECTOR—STOWE
drivers are in 2016 or newer tractors and our brand new trailers keep rolling in weekly.
HELEN DAY ART CENTER
Qualified candidates should have at least three months of tractor/trailer driving within the last
year, no DUIs within the last five years, and a valid Class A CDL. The Education Director is charged with executing the Helen Day Art Center’s arts education
and outreach programs in the areas of youth education, teen education, adult education and
Please swing by 52 Three Mile Bridge Rd in Middlesex from 8 am until 5 pm to see us or call outreach. He/she will work collaboratively with the Executive Director to set the vision and
(802) 899-0065 and talk to Brian Driscoll. Also contact Brian at bdriscoll@centraltransport.com programming strategy for the education department.
Key qualities include a passion for art and education and those we serve, attention to detail,
hard-working, team player, self-driven, and previous experience with art education.
COMMUNITY ORGANIZER—MONTPELIER The role requires the ability to work with extreme accuracy and efficiency, a high degree of
THE VERMONT NATURAL RESOURCES COUNCIL (VNRC), in partnership with the dependability and professionalism, expertise in customer service, strong knowledge of curricula
Vermont Conservation Voters (VCV), has an exciting opportunity for an outgoing person design, office fundamentals, ability to maintain good spirit and humor under pressure, and
who wants to have a significant impact on the future of Vermont. trustworthiness. 32-40 hours, salaried
We are looking for a motivated person to help advance policy initiatives related to climate Bachelor’s degree required in art education. Position is open until filled
action, clean energy and environmental protection through grassroots engagement. The
position will also assist VCV to help elect environmental champions to the Vermont To apply, submit a cover letter, resume and references to Jen Schoeberlein at deputy@helenday.
legislature and statewide offices. com. Please include the words “Education Director” in the subject line.
Job responsibilities include educating the public on our environmental campaigns, building
the support we need to advance a pro-climate, pro-environment policy agenda, and elect
environmental and climate champions to public office. The successful candidate will be self-
directed and have good writing skills; be able to communicate effectively with a variety of
PRODUCTION TEAM MEMBER—CABOT
audiences, including members and activists; be able to work collaboratively in a busy office CABOT CREAMERY– Are you interested in working in a fast-paced, team-oriented
environment; have experience in social media; and be committed to working on behalf of environment, where “The World’s Best Cheddar” is made? Then we have the perfect career
Vermont’s citizens, environment and communities. opportunity for you!
Applicants should have a B.A. or B.S. in a relevant field (although pertinent life experience Agri-Mark / Cabot Creamery is seeking Full Time 1st & 2nd shift Production Team Members
may be substituted for education) and, preferably, experience with an advocacy organization. to work at our Cutting & Wrapping Plant located in Cabot, VT. Positions are available
working on our fast-paced production lines responsible for packaging cheese while ensuring
Starting salary is commensurate with experience. Email a letter of interest, resume, and three the highest safety and quality standards.
references to Lauren Hierl, VCV Executive Director, lhierl@vermontconservationvoters.com
Schedule flexibility to include weekend availability is required. Previous production and/or
manufacturing experience is desired, but we are willing to train dependable and motivated
individuals. Qualified candidates must possess a High School diploma or GED, and be able to
DIRECTOR OF FINANCE—WATERBURY frequently lift up to 50 pounds.
THE HIMALAYAN CATARACT PROJECT (HCP) seeks a dedicated and engaging professional We offer a competitive salary, shift differentials and comprehensive benefits package to include
to lead its accounting and finance function. This newly created position will provide strategic medical, dental, vision, disability, life insurance, 401k and pension. Candidates are encouraged
and analytical leadership in the development of a cohesive, results-oriented, grant compliance to apply in person at our Cabot HR Department, online at jobs@cabotcheese.com, or send
and financial monitoring function, with focus on upgrading current tools, platforms, and your resume w/ cover letter to:
practices with view towards scaling. For more information and a full position description, Cabot Creamery Administrative Office, ATTN: Roger Nadeau (HR), 193 Home Farm Way,
please visit our website cureblindness.org. Send applications to jobs@cureblindness.org. Waitsfield, VT 05673
PAG E 2 2 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

A Year With No Garden


by Mimi Clark

G
ardens are what transform houses into homes. Homes have gardens. Gardens
announce the presence of a homemaker. Homemaking is the art of creating an
escape from the complexities, the chaos, and the noise of the rest of the world, a
lost art form that traditionally has been reserved for women.
The Betty Crocker Homemaker Award for Tomorrow was once an award given to a high
school senior girl who, after scoring the highest on a test and a written essay, received
a pin and applause at graduation. She was awarded by the fictitious ideal cook and
baker, Betty Crocker, who was invented by General Mills, which refined all our grains,
took out the nutrients, and fed them to animals. Women were to give up imaginative
participation in cooking and baking for the Betty Crocker products and, in return,
would have more satisfaction and time to do things that they enjoyed more. Somewhere
Photo by Mimi Clark
in that sales pitch, half of the imaginations of a nation were stifled.
I won the homemaker award my senior year, but not for using the Betty Crocker ways. break from the artificial light, but the secret is there have to be four fluorescent bulbs
Instead, after answering all the questions on the test, I wrote an essay on how to save across for enough intensity. In my experience, the plants don’t seem to care whether
the world’s children. I was surprised to win because I never took a high school home they have fancy full-spectrum bulbs or warm light ones or even the plain cool industrial
economics course; everything I knew I had learned from my mother. I had run away variety, but there have to be four across no closer than four to six inches. The plants will
from home just before graduation when my sister was calling me the Harwood home complain when something is wrong, they will not look great.
breaker. Five years later, I passed on the torch, so to speak, to my younger brother in law, If they get chlorosis and turn yellow from either too much light or iron or limestone
who won the award for the blue and white striped kaftan he made in sewing class. He in unfiltered water from a deep well, water them with rain water. As with babies, the
then got married in his creation. Soon after, the award ceased to exist. needs of young plants are very finite. Tomato plants for instance need a lot of calcium
In my mind, a house can’t be a home without something growing in the brightest when they are bigger, but I prefer to collect rainwater for the seedlings when they are
daylight or under artificial lights. A garden can be as simple as a row of pots on the small because they like a slightly acidic soil, which I have come to interpret as around
windowsill, a warm sunny one above the kitchen sink; like eight pots of tuberoses, small pH 6.8, like roses; anything lower will not ensure maximum disease resistance and cold
bulbs that grow into tall, white, flowering and fragrant grassy spikes. Getting them to hardiness. I alternate high-calcium alkaline well water with acidic rain water and they
bloom is called gardening. Getting them to bloom brings sense to life. It also can all thrive like nobody’s business.
happen under lights. A year of having no garden and severe cold were trying to force me into feeling sorry
This year, I didn’t plant my big beef tomato seeds until three weeks after Town Meeting for myself and perpetual self medication, but I am not yielding to the empty promises.
Day because my house is selling on the frost-free date for our area and I couldn’t decide Transitory as it has been, my instant greenhouse garden has gotten me through the
whether I should bother planting anything at all. But at the last minute, something like coldest April. The tomatoes, asparagus, onions, tuberoses, and blue poppies all came up,
the homemaking urge came over me and the next thing I knew, my indoor greenhouse thrived, and were sold just like that to Vee’s Flowers and Settlement Farm.
was lighted, and I planted as space would allow. I am alone on a beautiful spring evening having sold my plants, having sold my home
Asparagus, onions, tomatoes, and blue poppies; move or no move these seeds were and my garden, and what do I have left? I have the source. I have my mind still full with
going down into the compost at the last minute and getting watered. Under fluorescent decades of memories from experimenting passionately with plants in all kinds of places,
lights that I leave on 24/7, the normal pattern of light and growth is distorted in favor inside and out, rented, borrowed, loaned, and owned. I still have the source to make a
of more light. None of the plants I have ever tried to grow have minded not getting a garden and a home somewhere else.

Green Bag and Pointed Stick by Jules Rabin

B
esides the mighty changes going on in the country now that keep some of us tuned from that once-a-year foray we make with our green bags—that the times they are a
in as never before to the daily news, I can testify to a small change on our road changing—could have been caused by a change in the habits of just one person traveling
in Marshfield. Yesterday, my wife and I went out on our quiet, unpaved road in that stretch of road just a few times a week throughout the year: that one smoker and
observance of Green Up Day, each carrying an empty green plastic bag and a stick with drinker, perhaps, who traveled our road on his way home from work and looked for
a nail, point out, at its end—our usual equipment when we go a-scavenging on that one solace from life’s hardships in the contemplative half hour of the drive home with a
day of the year. beer and a snack handy to tone down life’s large hungers. Might it be that this year our
We’ve made that brief annual trek along the same road for most of the last 50 years, hypothetical traveler turned over a new leaf, or moved to another place, and no longer
beginning in 1969 or 1970, and I can happily testify that the pickings of the roadside takes out his griefs, if that’s what they are, by delivering a couple of tosses on our peaceful
litter we go after on that single day of the year were slimmer this year than ever before. roadside?
As usual, bottles and cans predominated in the litter we picked up. We’re a thirsty Who knows?
race and don’t mind shelling out money to quench our thirst when our drink is laced There are two established farms, incidentally, on our stretch of road. While doing my
with alcohol or sugar. But the bottles and cans were much fewer in number this year annual Green Up stint I saw one farmer neighbor, too distant to greet, cutting firewood
than usual, and than ever before in my experience, in fact. The same with fast-food on his “free” Saturday morning. The second of those two farmers came out of his barn
wrappings. And—Puritans and health advocates, take heart!—our “haul” held fewer to greet me and say a few words when I hove into sight. He had been working—I could
beer cans and cigarette packages than ever before. see that on his shirtfront—on the selfsame morning I was sporting with my green bag
Of course, given the statistics of small numbers, the casual conclusions we drew Saturday and nail-pointed stick.
The job I was doing was merely decorative, you might say, with no cash value even,
to mark its small importance. But maybe in a very large perspective, the health of the
planet, for example, and the bequest of a visible form of decency to our posterity, my
green-bag-and-pointed-stick routine was “necessary,” just as the work my two neighbors
were doing was necessary. Mine just did not have the immediacy of the pressing work
Since 1972 they were doing right then on that same Saturday morning.
Repairs • New floors and walls
Crane work • Decorative concrete
Consulting • ICF foundations
114 Three Mile Bridge Rd., Middlesex, VT • (802) 229-0480 
gendronbuilding@aol.com •  gendronconcrete.com
T H E B R I D G E J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 • PAG E 2 3

Letters
Every summer my older and street-wise Farms of All Sizes Are Best Use of spring snow melts and rains and helps hold
cousins from Montreal, Helen and Nancy, Vermont Land water. As soil organic matter increases by
came down on the train with their huge Editor, one percent, through these practices, the
trunks to stay during their school vacation soil absorbs 25,000 additional gallons of
with their mother, Aunt Helen Bisbee I am proud to say that I am a dairy water per acre.
Marsh, in their little summer house next farmer. Our farm strives to take the best
Thanks to Volunteers possible care of our land and animals On many of our fields we transport manure
to our farm. Formerly a home for hired directly from our manure pits through a
Editor, farm help, it had no electricity, running so that we can provide a source of local
food for our community and beyond. It pipeline hose which connects to a tractor in
I am writing to thank the dedicated water, or other modern conveniences, but the field and is spread or injected directly
it was fine for them to spend the summer was disheartening to read a recent letter
volunteers who have helped with recent into the soil, protecting water quality and
in the country and be near all the family to the editor by Mimi Clark, the wife of
downtown beautification projects. These soil health. An added benefit to both no-
relatives. Their dad, Uncle “Deke” Robert a dairy farmer, claiming that the Vermont
projects, led by the Montpelier Alive Design till planting and piping our manure is less
Marsh came down only a few times to visit. landscape can’t support large dairy farms,
Committee, help contribute toward a more equipment trips over the field (and road)
He worked as an executive for Aluminium like ours.
attractive and vibrant downtown, and we which reduces soil compaction and fuel
could not have completed them without Limited in Montreal. The best way to keep our environment usage.
volunteer support. It was always a joyous occasion for me as healthy is to keep farms of all sizes in
business. According to the Lake Champlain Before we consider transitioning farmland
The North Branch River Art project, led by their country cousin, to see and hear what to other uses, it’s important to recognize
was going on in the rest of the outside world Basin Program, one acre of urban/suburban
Design Committee Chair Didi Brush, was that dairy is a local food that is affordable
through their more metropolitan view of land contributes about four times more
inspired by an art installation in Quebec and nutrient rich and can feed millions of
things. They often quoted to me the story phosphorus to the Lake than one acre of
City in 2008. This project brings majesty people. Our farm is a member of Cabot
of the city mouse and the country mouse, farm land.
and allure to Montpelier’s rivers, which are Creamery Cooperative where our milk is
an oft-forgotten downtown asset. denounced the American flag while singing On our farm, we manage 3,600 acres of made into cheese, butter, yogurt and other
“God Save the King/Queen,” and kept me land to feed our cows. We have worked dairy products.
More than 170 plants were planted in
apprised of the Führer's latest escapades in extensively with the Vermont Land Trust
City Hall Plaza, softening and beautifying Currently, New England produces about 10
Germany! over the years and own 1,675 acres of
this underutilized space. Now, downtown percent of its own food according to Food
(My cousin Helen, who still lives in that conserved farm land. Soil health is crucial
workers and visitors can enjoy a meal or a Solutions New England. Their goal is to
totally renovated little house, reminded me to the cleanliness and future of our water
moment of contemplation surrounded by increase that to 50 percent so that we are
recently that they also took what was known and food supply. The soils and nutrients on
beauty but still in touch with the pulse of the less dependent on other parts of the country
as “the stage” back and forth from Middlesex our fields are kept in place by covering them
town. The flowers were planted on Green that are facing water shortages and drought
on occasion. This was a van used by the with plants all year; studies show that this is
Up Day by the Design Committee with the due to a changing climate. Vermont family
postal service to deliver mail to the town helping to sequester carbon.
assistance of volunteers from National Life farmers can meet this challenge and feed
Group. post offices on Route 100 from Montpelier Each spring we plant corn, without tilling people in a sustainable way, but we need
and also served as a local mail carrier for up the soil, the land is left intact and the your support.
And finally, dozens of flower barrels and
rural postal customers along the route to seeds are planted directly into the ground
hanging flower baskets will be planted and Clara Ayer, East Montpelier
Warren. It probably replaced what once was through existing vegetation. When soil
placed across downtown in the coming
a real stage coach that filled the same duty is undisturbed the root systems, worms
weeks.
years before. When this happened we would and bugs all help to retain nutrients while
These projects were funded in part just have to pick them up on Route 100 at doing the tillage work themselves, creating Letters to the paper are not
by Downtown Improvement District the intersection of Meadow Road.) pathways for water and nutrients to be
funds, with administrative support from
fact-checked and do not
I therefore remember the old train station absorbed.
Montpelier Alive. necessarily represent
fondly and have been saddened by its Our corn is harvested in the fall and
We invite readers to be involved as volunteers apparent neglect, as it seemed to be sinking immediately, our winter-rye cover crop is the views of The Bridge.
or supporters by contacting director@ into the sunset along with many other old planted. Rye protects our soil through the
montpelieralive.org. icons including ourselves. How great to
Dan Groberg, Montpelier realize that it is being rehabilitated by The
Pyralisk, which I also remember as having We welcome your letters and opinion pieces. Letters must be
its home behind the Montpelier Fire Station
Thanks to Hecht, Pyralisk in the building next to the steep hill. I think fewer than 300 words. Opinion pieces should not exceed 600
Editor, I will send them a tiny donation, which is all words. The Bridge reserves the right to edit and cut pieces.
my lowered social status can do at this time! Send your piece to: editorial@montpelierbridge.com.
As I was about to throw away my copy of
Thank you, Nicholas Hecht!
The Bridge [May 3], I noted an article by
Nicholas Hecht that had not jumped out at
Deadline for the next issue is June 15
Mary Alice Bisbee, North Waitsfield
me earlier—“Finding Space for Art: Pyralisk
Rises from the Rubble.” Yes, someone is
finally going to do something about the
lovely Middlesex train station! So many times
in the past few years as I drove by it on my
trips to and from my family home at Round
Barn Farm in North Waitsfield, I would
comment to myself about the dilapidated
state of this once thriving building and
wonder if someone was ever going to do • New Construction Design & Build
something about it. Thank goodness, it will
be preserved and not bulldozed! • Renovations Custom Energy-Efficient Homes
It reminded me of my childhood in the
1940s, when the Middlesex station was an
• Woodworking Additions • Timber Frames
Weatherization • Remodeling
active hub on the Montreal-to-Boston and • General Contracting
New York Canadian rail system. My dad Kitchens • Bathrooms • Flooring
shipped out his very high-quality gallons of
“grade Fancy” maple syrup in large wooden Tiling • Cabinetry • Fine Woodwork
containers nailed together at our farm, and
I often accompanied him on those trips on
what was then Route 100 to Middlesex.
Now the road is Route 100B, exchanging
route numbers with what was then a dirt
road over Duxbury Hill to Waterbury.
223-3447
clarconstruction.com
PAG E 24 • J U N E 7 – J U N E 2 0 , 2 018 THE BRIDGE

Everything’Snot What It Appears! by Larry Floersch

O
kay. I’ve Another thing that is missing on these supposed royal Even the Queen herself provides evidence of this elaborate
seen all children is a multitude of Mickey Mouse or Teenage Mutant subterfuge. Sure, the George and Charlotte robots have been
those Ninja Turtle Band-Aids. Are you going to tell me these programmed to amuse the Queen by calling her ”Gan-Gan”
photos of the royal children, kids do not get bruises, bumps, and scrapes just because with cute electronic voices, but take a moment to examine
Prince George and Princess they are royals? To that I say, with my best British accent, photographs of the Queen when her great grandchildren are
Charlotte of Cambridge. “Shuttlecock!” They do not get bruises and scrapes because present. Do you ever see any vomit or chocolate stains—or
And they would be adorable their robotic skin is some sort of mixture of high-tech snail tracks—on the lapels of her impeccably tailored pastel
children if they were real. But they are not. I know this polymers and polytetrafluoroethylene. Not only does it resist suits? No! Obviously these “children,” being robots, are too
because all children in that age range have one feature in damage, but Band-Aids do not stick to it. That’s not true of heavy to sit on their great grandmother’s lap and wipe their
common that the designers of these audioanimatronic robots real kids. When he was little, my son once wore the same faces on her clothing.
forgot: Snot candles! Band-Aid on his boo-boo for three years. I do not mean to imply that Prince William and Princess Kate
Now I know what you’re thinking. “But Lare, these kids are If Princess Charlotte were a real toddler like my granddaughter, do not have any children. I am sure the real Prince George
royals. They are not like normal kids. They have nannies she would leave behind her a trail of Cheetos and Goldfish and Princess Charlotte, after their initial debut in swaddling
and governesses just beyond the cameras, and those nannies crackers, kind of like the breadcrumbs of Hansel and Gretel. clothes, were spirited away to Balmoral or some other royal
and governesses have hundreds of boxes of Kleenex at their The cushions in the royal carriages would resemble the back hiding place in Scotland to be raised in secret, away from the
disposal, just waiting, like the ball boys and ball girls at seat of my car, where the crumbs of these crackers have cameras and the public eye, so as to save the royal family the
Wimbledon, to swoop in and wipe away those snot candles become an orange paste after being mixed with droplets of embarrassment of appearing less than regal. And some day in
in a flash.” water from a constantly inverted sippy cup—a sippy cup that, the future, after they have outgrown the snot candles, poopy
But you’d be wrong, because I’ve had experience with the along with an indescribable stuffed animal, never leaves my nappies, and SpaghettiOs faces, the buttons under the wigs
phenomenon of snot candles in toddlers, and I know it takes granddaughter’s side. But there is no evidence, in the form on their robotic stand-ins will be pushed to “off,” and the real
those candles less than 2.5 seconds to regrow after a nose of orange paste, actual crackers, or an orange residue around children will take their place in royal society.
wipe. Even using one of those snot-sucking aspirator bulbs her lips or on her dress, to suggest that Princess Charlotte And as far as that new little brother, I just read they named
doesn’t slow down the regrowth of the candles. And don’t consumes such delights, much less SpaghettiOs or buttered him Louis. I had really hoped they would name him Uther,
even talk to me about the apparatus in which you insert the noodles. And there is nary a sippy cup or grungy stuffed after Uther Pendragon, the legendary father of King Arthur,
business end into the child’s nose and suck on a clear plastic animal to be seen in the photos of her. just to give the family a less-polished, less-hygienic, fifth-
hose with your mouth to pull the mucus into a reservoir. And just look at Princess Charlotte’s feet. She always has on century edge. Given the cold, dirty, damp living conditions
You wouldn’t catch me using one of those things unless that socks and shoes! And the shoes match! And they are on the in those days, the real Uther probably had snot candles as an
clear plastic hose was as long as the Trans-Alaska pipeline. right feet! adult.
No-sir-ee! No, I say, these are not real children! God Save Gan-Gan!

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