No Time for the Doves?

Intrusion and Redrafting in the English Translation of "La plaça del

Diamant"
Author(s): Dominic Keown
Source: The Modern Language Review, Vol. 100, No. 3 (Jul., 2005), pp. 659-672
Published by: Modern Humanities Research Association
Stable URL: http://www.jstor.org/stable/3739119
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 NO TIME FOR THE DOVES? INTRUSION

AND REDRAFTING IN THE ENGLISH

TRANSLATION OF LA PLAQA DEL DIAMANT

Translation is a notoriously parlous activity; and if it is thus when dealing

with a major 'normalized' European language, then it is even more fraught
in the case of a 'minority' idiom such as Catalan. In this respect, not only is
the issue compromised by the thorny problem of the idiosyncrasies of a lan?
guage standardized comparatively recently?whose agreed norm still remains
severely questioned in some of its constituent areas?but also by a series of
extra-textual considerations which the translator is obliged to take on board.
These more objective criteria have been mentioned elsewhere but might be
summed up by the formula that the apology for, and defence and promotion
of, a marginalized culture habitually implicit in this particular type of activity
can often be responsible for strategies of interference in the translation process
which would not come into consideration in the renderings of material from
one major linguistic medium to another.1
These pressures were no doubt familiar to the late poet and translator David
Rosenthal as he undertook in the late 1970s an English version of Merce Ro-
doreda's seminal novel of 1962, La placa del Diamant.2 The work in question
is especially dear to the heart of the native population. In many ways the book
captures the Zeitgeist ofthe pre-democratic period and the frustratedly plangent
intimacy of its depiction of the travails of the downtrodden protagonist and her
tortured attempts at survival elicit a sympathetic identification experienced
collectively by a nation whose existence was similarly compromised so savagely
by the exclusive uniformity of Franco's Spain.
What is more, within the context of culture as a means of national defence,
there is a further consideration of a sociolinguistic nature. With the literary
quality of its prose and the immediate international recognition it attained, the
novel stood defiantly as proof that, despite the policy of linguistico-cultural
extermination conducted by the regime, Catalan as a language?though ap?
parently reduced to the status of a patois?could still be used successfully in
the arena of high culture and was by no means lost to posterity as the dictator
expressly wished. The point is crucial as, despite its proletarian ethos, linguistic
purity and correct ness are a major feature ofthe original and, as such, should be
privileged in turn in the target language. As if these external pressures were not
sufflcient in themselves, the immensity of the translator's task was increased
by the entire lack of philological support. At this time various dictionaries
were available but not directly helpful for the task in hand. The rudimentary
Catalan-Castilian manual was not the most reliable of tools, and the thought

1 For a more detailed account of the

pressuresin translatingfromCatalan see my paper given
at the I Online Conferenceon Catalan Studies, 'Some Reflectionson the Translations of Ausias
March', publishedvirtuallyat http://www.f1tz.cam.ac.Uk/ausias/ponencies3_a.html#KEOWN [ac?
cessed 13 January2005].
2 For furtherdeliberationon this
topic,see Helena Miguelez Carballeira,'Language & Charac?
terizationin Rodoreda'sL<z/>/apzdel Diamant', Translator,9 (2003), 101-24.

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660 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

of a Catalan-English wordbook was little more than a pipe dream which would
not be realized for another five years.3
Quite apart from these environmental pressures, the text itself, like all works
of literary quality, would prove challenging for the translator. There can be
little question, for example, that the fundamental feature of the novel?and
one, therefore, to be rendered successfully at all costs in the target language?
is the narrative voice, so crucial to an understanding of the book as a whole.
It would be in no way excessive to posit that our appreciation of the work
depends on our evaluation of the autobiographical narrator. And it is precisely
through the analysis of her discourse that we get close to her as an individual
and thereby close to an understanding of the complexity of the experience
recounted.
The peculiarity of the interior monologue which, over a period of decades in
the plot, remains unusually fixed in rhythm, tone, mood, and content is funda?
mental to Rodoreda's artistic achievement. The essential part ofthe translator's
endeavour in the case in hand, therefore, will be to communicate this element as
accurately as possible. And consequently our assessment of Rosenthal's version
will focus primarily on his relative success in this area.
In this respect, semantic accuracy is of evident importance. Terminological
precision is, of course, a goal of translation, yet in this particular case any
significant inexactitude will produce confusion and thus inevitably compromise
appreciation of the smoothness of the narrative flow in the target language.
Happily, in terms of lexis the English version is generally sound. The long lists
of items associated with the contemporary female experience as the narrator/
protagonist, Colometa, describes her proletarian life as confectioner's assistant,
subservient homemaker, cleaner, and finally grocer's wife within the familiar
terrain ofthe city are generally accurate: no mean feat given the paucity of lexical
recourses available. As in any translation, however, oversights are apparent and
the following are examples gleaned from a primary reading, together with a
suggestion for a more satisfactory version.

Va sortir un nen d'una
entrada, amb un revolver
al cinturo i una escopeta
apuntada, i va passar fre-
gant-me les faldilles i cri-
dant, meequi . . . meequi
(p- 71)4
Fer el vermut (passim)
A man [!] came out of the A boy [!]
building with a revolver
in his belt and holding aiming
a shotgun and went by,
brushing against my shirt
and calling out, 'Meki,
meki . . .' [!] (p. iq)s
To have a vermouth To have an aperitif

3
Josep Miracle's Diccionari Catala-Castella (Barcelona: Edhasa, 1969) was widely available
aftera second edition in 1976, whereas Salvador Oliva's Diccionari Catala-Angles (Barcelona:
Enciclopedia Catalona, 1986) would not appear untilfiveyearsafterthe translationwas produced
in 1981.
4 The page numbersrefer
respectivelyto Laplaca del Diamant, 9th edn (Alzira: Bromera,2003)
and The Timeof theDoves (Saint Paul, MN: GraywolfPress, 1986) (firstpaperbackedn).
5 Throughout this study I shall signal occasions wherethe
targetversioninvolvesa conflation,
explication,addition,unwarrantedchangein punctuation,or syntacticalreconstruction thatdiffers
fromthe originaltext,forappropriatecommenttowardsthe end of the article.

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 66l

i mataven jueus per les
parets i per terra (p. 85)
I va venir la festa major
[. . .] i el senyor que Pha-
via encarregada li havia
sortit jueu i l'havia es-
canyat. (p. 108)
I que amb la fama que li
feia, si no es casava amb
ell s'hauria de quedar per
vestir sants. (p. 259)
and were killing Jews [!] and were making a racket6
on the walls and on the
ground (p. 34)
And it came time for the And time came for
neighborhood street fes-
tival [. . .] and the man
who had asked him to
do it turned out to be a turned out to be a penny-
Jew and had gypped him. pincher
(P- 53)
And with the reputation
he was giving her if she if she didn't marry him
didn't marry him she'd she'd end up on the shelf [!~
end up dressing saints.
(P. 186)

This type of lexicographical over sight is clearly disappointing: though perhaps

not so much for the mistranslation in itself as for the confusion visited on the
tenor and drift of the narrative. Much more significant in this area, however,
are a series of propositions which produce a more disconcerting effect through
the creation of a qualitatively divergent impression in the readers of the target
language from that experienced by their native counterparts.
First and foremost, of course, is the title of the piece itself. The toponymic
reference, 'La placa del Diamant' (Diamond Square), around which the ma?
jority of the novel's action unfolds, is crucial for a number of elementary rea?
sons. The narrative is fixed purposefully in the proletarian district of Gracia,
and throughout the novel the increasingly desperate poverty of the protago?
nist's condition finds an ironic counterpoint in the insistence on the square's
name. The gemstone is richly valued?as is Colometa's experience at various
intervals?but her existence is played out in a hard and hostile environment
and she is plagued ontologically by its impenetrability. Both these connotations
are, of course, conveyed by the original title.
The urban toponym is likewise significant in its insistence on spatial deli-
mitation. The city of Barcelona, for example, is never depicted as a whole?as
far as we are aware, it is never even named?but rather described by a series
of sections or divisions that underline, once more, the partial and truncated
nature of the protagonist's experience. Indeed, towards the end of the book her
agoraphobia becomes so pronounced that she is unable physically to change
her place (placa), traverse street boundaries, or cross neighbourhood divisions
without fainting. Finally, of course, the legendary coldness of theprecious stone
reflects the callous severity of the 'cor de neu' (p. 207) that the narrator must
assume in order to survive the near insuperable difficulties during the war years.
As such, the title rendered as The Time of the Doves is both contentious
and problematic. As the rudimentary outline above indicates, the reader in
the target language is significantly disadvantaged as regards the importance
and thematic relevance of the topography. More specious, in this respect, is
6 Matar
jueus is a popular custom enacted duringthe last threedays of Lent, whichconsistsof
childrenand youngpeople makinga noise with rattlesor clappers or banging on walls or on the
groundwithpalms and sticks.

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662 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

that the inflated lexis in the English version affords a more romanticized and
evocative dimension which, though present to some extent in the original text,
is exaggerated out of all proportion in the prominence of the title.7
Equally spurious and disorientating in this respect is the decision to render
coloms in the title and throughout the novel as 'doves' rather than the more usual
'pigeons'. The Britannia Online Encyclopedia offers the following definition:

Taxonomically, pigeons and doves are the same. Both are members of the order Colum-
biformes, family Columbidae. The term dove is generally used for smaller species with
pointed tails. Tigeon' refers to the larger species with square or rounded tails.8

In terms of cultural history, however, unlike its counterpart, the word 'dove' en-
joys connotations of a symbolically positive nature. The bird of Noah, Colum-
bus, Picasso, and Paraclete evokes a spiritual transcendence of peace, purity,
comfort, and deliverance. Needless to say, this association is entirely absent in
the original text, where the referent is clearly a pigeon.
Pigeon-fancying?the rearing of this species?is a working-class activity par
excellence across industrialized Europe and, as such, is clearly consistent with
the parameters of our narrative. To translate the word otherwise is to afford a
partial and putative impression which elicits a mystique absent in the Catalan.
In English, for example, 'dove' is never culturally associated with negativity.
This is certainly not the case, however, for Colometa, for whom the birds
constitute a displacing invader?soon to become a verminous pest?as they
take over the house, literally stifling the protagonist. Their pungent stench, the
parasites, and pestilence ('empastifaven', 's'espucaven' (p. 244)) are referred
to at the end of the book. Similarly, at an earlier moment, the insalubrious
profligacy of these creatures is described just before the narrator decides to rid
the house of what has become an insanitary and suffocating rival:

Em matava netejant coloms. Tota jo feia pudor de coloms [. . .] De vegades la senyora

em parlava i jo, distreta, com si tal cosa, no li contestava, i ella em deia, que no em sent?
No li podia dir que nomes sentia els coloms, que tenia a les mans deix de sofre dels
abeuradors, deix de veces [. . .] No podia dir-li que si un ou queia del covador a mig
covar la pudor em feia recular encara que m'estrenyes el nas amb dos dits. No podia
dir-li que nomes sentia crits de colomi demanant menjar amb tota la furia del cos ple de
canons grocs clavats a la earn morada. No podia dir-li que nomes sentia parrupeig de
coloms perque els tenia ficats a casa. (p. 163)
I was killing myself cleaning up after the doves. My whole body stank of doves. [. . .]
Sometimes the lady spoke to me and I wouldn't answer her I was in such a daze, [syntax]
and she'd say, 'Didn't you hear me?' [punctuation]
I couldn't tell her all I heard was doves, that my hands still smelled from the sulfer
in the water dishes and the birdseed [. . .] [missing: 'I couldn't tell her that if an egg fell
from the hatchery only half incubated the stench knocked me sideways even if I held
my nose with two fingers'] I couldn't tell her that all I heard was doves ['squabs'] crying
for food with all the fury in their bodies made of dark flesh stuck full of quills [syntax].
I couldn't tell her that all I heard was doves cooing because I had them shut up in my
house. (pp. 100-01)
7 This sentimentalizedversionofthetitle
mightwell representconcessionto one oftheobjective
criteriamentionedearlier:an attemptbythetranslatorat captatiobenevolentiae, elicitingemotional
support forthe marginalizedCatalan experienceratherthan offering a literaltranslation.
8 Definitionof 'Dove' in the EncyclopediaBritannica:www.britannica.com [accessed 13 January
2005].

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 663

Needless to say, the effect achieved in the target language by the replacement
here of 'doves' by 'pigeons' and the corresponding version of the offspring as
the correct 'squabs' rather than the more specious 'chicks' or 'newly hatched
doves' (passim) would offer a more appropriate and less semantically confused
impression ofthe odious nature ofthe experience. Similarly, in terms of nomen-
clature, 'the pigeon girl' in place of the 'the dove girl' and the heteronym 'little
pigeon' for 'Colometa his little dove' (p. 101/p. 18 and passim) would eradicate
the layer of sentimentality that is acquired in the target version by this spurious
and pervasive strategy.
It is, of course, difficult to gauge the extent of editorial influence in aspects
of titles and translation. And it may well be entirely reasonable to surmise that,
in a work like this which?despite its literary quality?will inevitably be read
against the background of the sentimentality of the novela rosa, pressure might
be exerted by the publisher to enhance the romantic emotivity and thereby
increase sales. In this case, however, the solution is inexact, misleading, and
tendentious; and the ensuing confusion visited on the target reader?entirely
absent in the original?necessarily disrupts appreciation of the fluidity of the
narrative.9
Unfortunately, we might isolate two other crucial occasions when the target
version also fails short in communicating the full significance of the original,
giving rise to a similar impairment of the discursive flux. Despite the banality
of much of Colometa's existence, moments of striking lyrical intensity occur
not infrequently in the text. Apart from their evocative uplift, these interstitial
flights function throughout the novel as repeated motifs which, adding to the
narrative terseness, elucidate and enhance the experience.
Early on in her marriage, for example, Colometa is taken for a ride to the
coast in nearby Badalona. Ironically, it is the only time she leaves the confines
of the city and she is duly impressed by the brooding melancholy of the sea.
For her, despite its imposing vastness, this great amorphous expanse of water
appears almost as if conditioned from outside as it looks 'gray and sad', given
the effect ofthe cloud cover. Similarly, its powerful undulatory surge is not seen
as self-generated but instigated by an alternative agency?that is to say, by the
'anger' of the fish breathing inside:
El mar no semblava d'aigua: trist i gris perque estava nuvol. I la inflor que li venia de
dintre era la respiracio dels peixos i la rabia dels peixos era la respiracio del mar, quan
el mar pujava mes amunt amb crestes i bombolles. (p. 99)
The sea didn't seem like water; the clouds had made it gray and sad [explicative]. And
the swelling that came from inside was the fish breathing and their anger [conflation]
was the sea's breath when it rose higher and made waves and bubbles. (p. 45)

The image recurs at significant moments in the text, usually as the protagonist
meditates on the vacuous nature of herself, her existence, and its corresponding
lack of internal determination. Disappointingly, at one of these related moments
9 Equally perplexing in this respect is the small photographon the cover of the paperback
version,inset and just by the title,which displays two greypigeons?not white doves?peering
down nonchalantlyover an extractfromthe textthatdescribestheiractivityin Colometa's home!
At thisjuncture it is also interestingto note that,apart fromthe English version,it is only the
Dutch edition,Colometa,thatchooses to adapt the titlein thisway.

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664 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

the translator fails to appreciate the real significance of the semantics and the
ensuing need for literality. The theme is thus severely compromised in the
target version:
A casa viviem sense paraules i les coses que jo duia a dintre em feien por perque no sabia
si eren meves. (p. 80)
We lived without words in my house [syntax] and the things I felt ['carried'] inside
scared me because I didn't know where they came from. [explication] (p. 28)

Clearly, the whole question of the nature of the self is of crucial importance
in a novel which deals fundamentally with the inability of a working-class
girl to take control of her life and act with autonomy. Here the bland?not to
say banal?yet extremely emotive antilyricism of the original, which focuses
precisely on the unconvincing interiority of the subject, is lost by the exterior
reference of the translation.
More significant in this respect is the rendering of another recurrent theme.
We refer, of course, to the painting on the wall of Senyora Enriqueta's flat which
so fascinates visitors and again becomes a motif throughout the work:

Tenia un quadro penjat amb un cordill groc i vermell, que figurava tot de llagostes amb
corona d'or, cara d'home i cabells de dona, i tota l'herba al voltant de les llagostes, que
sortien d'un pou, era cremada, i el mar al fons, i el cel per sobre, eren de color de sang
de bou i les llagostes duien cuirassa de ferro i mataven a cops de cua. (p. 81)
She had a picture that hung from a yellow ribbon [missing: 'and red'], full of lobsters
with gold crowns [conflation],with men's faces [missing: 'and women's hair'], and all of
the grass around the lobsters, who were coming out of a well, was brown [!], and the
sea in the background and the sky up above were the color of cow's [!] blood and the
lobsters wore armor and were killing each other [!] with blows from their tails. (p. 29)

Equivocation in this harrowing scene arises from the fact that llagosta will
not only translate as 'lobster' but also as 'locust'; and Rosenthal has opted
mistakenly, if also rather comically, for the former. Despite the surreal effect
of the misreading, the oversight might not be so enormous were it not for
the significance of the theme. Elsewhere in the text Rodoreda makes pertinent
use of scriptural reference, as may be appreciated with regard to the poignant
implications of Mossen Joan's sermon on gender roles, whose words resonate
hauntingly throughout the novel. In this case, significantly, the scene described
clearly relates to a work of art inspired by one of the apocalyptic visions from
Chapter 9 ofthe Book of Revelations (vv. 6-10), which quite clearly constitutes
the source of the painting described:

(6) And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it; and shall desire to die,
and death shall flee from them. (7) And the shapes of the locusts were like unto horses
prepared unto battle; and on their heads were as it were crowns like gold, and their faces
were as the faces of men. (8) And they had hair as the hair of women, and their teeth
were as the teeth of lions. (9) And they had breastplates, as it were breastplates of iron;
and the sound of their wings was as the sound of chariots of many horses running to
battle. (10) And they had tails like unto scorpions, and there were stings in their tails:
and their power was to hurt men five months.10
IO Revelations
9. 6-10, online at http://www.spindleworks.com/library/hoeksma/behold21.htm
[accessed 13 January2005].

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 665

Evidently, the thematic link is more than apparent but also of extreme signifi?
cance in the historical and personal context of the novel. Against the backdrop
of the impending individual and collective cataclysm about to be experienced
in the Civil War, Colometa actively seeks both her own death and that of her
children, but is, in keeping with the prophecy, incapable of achieving it. In
this scorched-earth environment, the fact that the grass is 'burnt' rather than
'brown' and the locusts are sent to devastate and attack humanity rather than
'each other' is also of a fundamental importance?as is the symbolic reference
to the bull. Needless to say, the vengeful idiom of Franco's divinely inspired
crusade and his war to lay waste to the sinful and godless hordes of the Republic
lurks hauntingly in the background in all its destructive menace. The transla?
tion thus entirely misses the force and significance of the original, as the target
reader could in no way be expected to appreciate the apocalyptic relevance from
this reference to cow's blood and a plague of self-destructive lobsters!
Our aim in considering such semantic infelicities, however, was to expose
the extent that they compromise the fluidity of the narrative style through the
confusion and hesitancy they generate in the target reader. Towards this end we
may now proceed to consider the same issue in the context of idiomatic usage.
In his comprehensive prologue to his edition of the work, Josep Antoni Fluixa
has summarized the essential ingredients of the insistent internal discourse,
and the following are the elements most relevant to this study:

De fet,l'autora en aquesta obra no reprodueix una parla concreta, sino que, segons Josep-
Miquel Sobre, fa un artifici,una creacio lingiiisticoliteraria coherentamb la personalitat
del personatge principal, i, sense apartar-se mai de la norma gramatical, fa un discurs
versemblant per al lector. I ho aconsegueix mitjancant uns recursos estilistics que li han
permes imitar la llengua popular sense caure mai en la necessitat d'usar vulgarismes ni
barbarisimes de cap especie per molt usuals que siguen al carrer. (p. 51, emphasis added)

American idiomatic usage in this respect is, of course, not problematic and,
as a result, transatlantic features are often applied with a good deal of success.
The rendering of senyora (passim) as 'ma'am' in direct speech is a pertinent
example, capturing the naturalness and fluency of the original to an extent that
the more inhibited and uncertain formula in Britain could not. Indeed, the
inventive ease of similar renderings, such as Quimet's sentimental vision of
the doves (sie) in the home ('ho va trobar molt bonic'/'thought it was all very
cute' (pp. 160/97)) ana< earlier poignant dismissal of his wife's employers ('com
mes rics mes estranys'/'the richer they are the weirder' (pp. 153/92)), tends to
comply easily with the tenor of the protagonist's register.
However, on a number of other occasions the colloquial idiom tends to jar,
seeming out of character both with the linguistic precision of the author and the
fluent but inevitably formal chasteness of Colometa's expression. The repeated
abbreviation 'ad' for 'anunci' in the episode ofthe protagonist's employment as
domestic cleaner (Chapters xx through xxvn) might exemplify the former. In
turn, the following examples may illustrate those occasions in the translation
when the register seems more common or streetwise than we would expect
from the demotic yet primly innocent tone of the narrative:

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666 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

I deiem que si la que And we used to talk about

moria primer era jo, ella
em faria una corona de
flors del temps, que no
fes la bogeria de fer-me-
la fer amb flors que es-
cassegen o amb flors no-
velles. (p. 167)
anar a trobar els amos i
armar-los un bollit de mil
dimonis. (p. 175)
I va ser aquell dia que
vaig dir que s'havia aca-
bat. Que s'havien acabat
els coloms. Coloms, ve?
ces, abeuradors, covadors,
colomar i escala de paleta,
tot a passeig! (p. 175)
tot plegat aigua pudent.
Tot perque si. (p. 178)
how if I died first [syn?
tax] she'd have a wreath
made for me of flowers
that were in season, that
she wouldn't be dumb [!]
enough as to have it made
with strange [!] flowers or
flowers that were hard to
find [!] (p. 104)
going out and looking for
them and giving them
hell. (p. 110)
And that was the day I
told myself I'd had it.
Pd had it with the doves.
Doves, birdseeds, water
dishes, roosts, dovecote,
ladder: the hell with them!
(p. 110)
altogether it was a pain in
the ass. All because that's
how it was. (p. 113)
she wouldn't be so daft as
to have it made with flow?
ers that were scarce or just
flowering.
going to get the owners and
making a rightfuss.
And that was the day I
said I could stand no more.
Time was up for the pi?
geons . . .
. . . the lot of them out on
their earl
it didn't make any sense.
No two ways about it!

In these cases it would seem that the register displays a tone of vulgarity which,
however banal, is more readily coarse than we would expect from our prim and
proper protagonist. The net result is, of course, to imbue the translated version
with an element of inconsistency in its colloquiality: a discordance which is
all the more lamentable given that the invariable authenticity of the narrative
idiolect is the cornerstone upon which the artistic edifice is constructed.
As important as the tenor ofthe register in this respect is the syntactic order of
the discourse. Here the possibilities of repetition, as Fluixa again elucidates, go a
long way to establishing and enhancing the demotic style that is so fundamental
to the work:

Fixem-nos, per exemple, en la frase seguent: 'i treia la pols i quan tenia la pols treta
la tornava a traure.' Amb aquest recurs, Tautora, segons Josep-Miquel Sobre, 'cerca la
vivacitat tot fent notar que la frase es dita sense reflexio sobre la manera mes precisa
d'expressar la idea, i no son pas evidencies de pobresa d'estructures sintactiques o de
manca de sentit logic' (p. 52)

The point is well made as this type of repeated structure, along with the insis-
tent dual strategies of polysyndeton and asyndeton (with a tendency towards
parataxis), is a key element and consistent feature of Rodoreda's prose. There
is no doubt, therefore, that it is a characteristic which must be reproduced in
the target language, There is no reason, however, why this should be restrictive
for the translator, as an important amount of theoretical speculation in this
area holds that it is precisely in the observance of the syntax of the original,
wherever possible, that the full flavour and peculiarity of the original is most
satisfactorily rendered.11
One may note,forexample,WalterBenjamin's speculationin the area of retentionof original

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 667

A pertinent example of how this may be achieved, especially at moments of

intensity, and despite the now familiar omissions and conflation, is apparent in
Chapter xx. Here the protagonist bemoans?and not with movingly plangent
rhythm enhanced by anaphora, polysyndeton, and zeugma?the precarious
nature of her efforts to make ends meet and run a family. Despite the lapses,
the translation captures the mood as the syntax is left largely as it stands in the
Catalan, with its accumulation and inversion communicating appropriately the
exhausted desperation of the speaker:

No podia dir-li que nomes sentia parrupeig de coloms perque els tenia ficats a casa i que,
si deixava oberta la porta de l'habitacio-colomar del pis, els coloms s'escampaven pertot
arreu i sortien pel balco al carrer com en un joe de bogeria. I que tot havia comencat
per culpa d'haver hagut d'anar a treballar a casa d'ells, perque estava tan cansada que
no tenia ni esma, quan calia, de dir no. No li podia explicar que no em podia queixar a
ningu, que el meu mal era un mal per mi sola i que, si alguna vegada em queixava a casa,
en Quimet em deia que li feia mal la cama. No li podia dir que els meus fills eren com
flors mal cuidades i que la meva casa que havia estat un cel se m'havia tornat un desori
i que la nit, quan portava els nens a dormir i els alcava la camisa i els feia ring-ring al
melic per fer-los riure, sentia el parrupeig dels coloms i tenia el nas pie pudor de febre
de colomi. (p. 164)
I couldn't tell her that all I heard was doves cooing [syntax] because I had them shut up
in my house and that if I left the door open to that dovecote room [missing: 'in the flat']
the doves would scatter everywhere and keep flying out the balcony like some crazy
game. And that it all began when I started working for her [conflation: 'on account of
my having to go and work for them'] because I was so tired I didn't have the sense to
say no when I needed to [syntax]. I couldn't tell her I had no one to complain to, that
it was my own private sickness [conflation: 'my hurt was a hurt for me alone'] and if I
ever complained at home Quimet would start telling me his leg hurt. I couldn't tell her
my children were like wildflowers no one took care of and my apartment, which used to
be a heaven, had turned into a hell ['bedlam'], and when I put the kids to bed at night
[missing: 'and lifted up their night shirts'] and went ring-ring on their belly buttons to
make them laugh I heard doves cooing and my nose was full of the stench of feverish
newly hatched doves ['squabs']. (p. 101)

Unfortunately, elsewhere in the novel the translator insistently restructures

the syntax, forcing it to conform, in our opinion quite unnecessarily, with what
seems to be a more streamlined version in English. In this way, much of the
sense of difference?so often referred to as a cornerstone of translation?is
not maintained as the secondary version is coerced strategically into a more
prosaically efficient syntactical structure.12 In terms of style the effect is de-
bilitating. The repetition of syntax and vocabulary, such a trait of Colometa's
expression and so crucial in the establishment of the rhythmic colloquiality of
the discourse, dissipates, thus diluting much of the characteristic resonance:

syntaxin translationwhich seems pertinentto this case: 'A real translation[. . .] allows the pure
language, as though reinforcedby its own medium, to shine on the originalall the more fully.
All this may be achieved by a literal renderingof the syntaxwhich proves words ratherthan
sentencesto be the primaryelementof the translator'('The Task of the Translator', in Theories
of Translation,ed. by Rainer Schulte and JohnBiguenet (Chicago: Universityof Chicago Press,
1992), pp. 71-82 (pp. 79-8o)).
12 For informationabout the notion of maintenanceof a sense of 'difference'in translation
see Wilhelm von Humboldt, 'Introduction to his Translation of Agamemnon', in Theoriesof
Translation(see Schulte and Biguenet,above), pp. 55-59.

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 668 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

Pere s'havia quedat com un llumi quan,
despres d'haver-lo ences, el bufen. (p. 72)
Em va dir que tenien un llogater en
un cobert i, aquest llogater, en aquest
cobert, hi tenia fabriqueta de cavalls de
cartro. (p. 154)
Una nit vam voltar pels carrers amb
en Cintet, despres d'haver sortit del
Monumental, fins a les dues. I quan
vam arribar davant de casa i en Cin?
tet ja se n'anava, no vam poder entrar.
La clau de la porta del carrer, desa-
pareguda [. . .] despres van dir que el
que l'havia agafada era jo pero no sabien
dir quan l'havia agafada ni si havien vist
que l'agafes. (p. 107)
Pere had flamed up like a match when
you blow on it. [conflation] (p. 21)
She said they had a tenant in a shed that
he used to make toy horses. [conflation]
(P. 92)
One night, after we'd left the Monumen-
tal Bar, we walked around with Cintet
till two in the morning. [syntax] And
when we got home and Cintet was about
to leave, we couldn't get in. The front
door key had [!] disappeared [. . .] [ex-
plication] Then they said I'd taken it
[syntax] but they couldn't remember
when or if they'd seen me. [conflation]
(PP- 51-52)

Examples of such syntactical abbreviation abound in the work and are usually
evident to some degree on every page. Particularly unsatisfactory in this regard
is the awkward application of the possibilities ofTered by the English genitive.
On certain occasions the expression becomes almost comically stunted and the
natural flow ofthe original is needlessly truncated:

la palma de la filla d'en Mateu (p. 86) Mateu's daughter's palm (p. 34)
voste es pensa que tinc ganes de casar- You think I want to get married and
me i d'enterrar-me i ser la senyora del bury myself being the corner coffee-
cafeter de la cantonada? (p. 252) seller's wife? [punctuation] (p. 182)
i tot d'una em vaig adonar que jo estava and all of a sudden I realised I was
damunt de l'ombra del cap de la Rita; standing on Rita's shadow's head; or
mes ben dit, l'ombra del cap de la Rita more precisely, the shadow of her head
em pujava una mica damunt els peus. fell a little above my feet (p. 183)
(p. 255)
Needless to say, the distortion is most extreme at moments of lyrical intensity
and compromises the natural flow ofthe original. The poeticitat of Rodoreda's
style has been frequently cited and correctly extolled by critics. As was indi?
cated, one of its fundamental features is the demotic rhythm effected by the
anaphora of syntax and lexis that imbues everyday language with a more lyrical
feel. Consequently, the insistent foreshortening of the expression into a more
'logically' condensed mould severely prejudices one ofthe salient features ofthe
work. Similarly, the power of metaphorical compression and correspondingly
impactful use of anaphora is frequently dissipated by the simplicity of elemen?
tary explication. All these elements are apparent in the following extract, which
describes a trip to market in an idiom redolent with lyricism.

Sortia del meu carrer,i travessava el carrer Gran, amb tranvies amunt i avall, grocs, amb
campaneta f. . .] I m'anava ficant en l'olor de la placa de vendre i en els crits de la placa
de vendre per acabar a dintre de les empentes, en un riu espes de dones i cistells [. . .]
Dels rengles de tripaires sortia l'olor fada de la mort. El rebuig de les besties tot servia
per ser venut damunt de fulles de coll [. . .] Dels ganxos penjaven els fetges molls de
sang per dintre i les tripes humides i el cap bullit [. . .] La meva peixatera, amb dents
d'or i rient, pesava palangres i a cada escata hi havia, petita que gairebe no es veia, la

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 669

bombeta que penjava damunt de la panera de peix [. . .] Les cols de paperina me les
guardava la meva verdulaire, vella, prima i sempre de negre. (p. 127)
I'd come out from my street, [missing: verb] across the Carrer Gran with yellow streetcars
going up and down ringing their bells [explication: verbs added] [. . .] I made my way
into the smell of the market [conflation; missing: 'square and the shouts of the market
square'] till I was in the middle of all that shoving?in a thick river of women and
baskets [. . .] The sweet smell of death came from the rows of offalsellers. [syntax] They
made use of all the animals' guts, selling them spread out on cabbage leaves [syntax]
[. . .] Livers soaked through with blood and wet tripe and boiled heads hanging from
hooks [. . .] [syntax] My fish seller, laughing through her gold teeth [conflation], was
weighing some fresh cod, and the light bulb hanging above her shone, so tiny you almost
couldn't see it, from every fish scale [syntax] [. . .] My vegetable seller ['greengrocer']
had saved some brussels sprouts for me?an old thin woman always dressed in black.
[syntax; explication] (pp. 69?70)
The severely edited target version can in no way do justice to the vitality
of the evocation of market day which lasts over two pages. In its inspiration,
dynamism, and resonance the description is not dissimilar to the verse of Salvat-
Papasseit, who was to convey with identical vigour the same quintessential drive
of urban proletarian experience?his favoured loci being the neighbourhood,
squares, and market?which Rodoreda elicits so powerfully here. In this respect
it is disappointing to note how the translator, himself an established poet, seems
to miss an opportunity virtually in every sentence to convey accurately the
consciously poetic nature of the prose.
Removing the verb 'travessava', significantly in the imperfect tense, which
would enhance description and repetition, the translator proceeds to add an?
other in the target version to register the movement of the trams, which utterly
dissipates the rhythmic intensity of the asyndetic chiasmus in the original. The
tempo is again compromised by the refusal to repeat 'market square' in its en-
tirety and the inexplicable omission of 'the shouts ofthe market square', which
lends such cumulative force to the metaphor and its zeugmatic finale. The al?
tered syntax ofthe next few sentences 'Dels rengles [. . .] Dels ganxos' not only
further enfeebles the pace but also eliminates the notion of immanence or the
sense of things being intuited or perceived slowly which is achieved so success?
fully in the original?with the subject being held back till after the verb?as
the protagonist is lured inevitably and mysteriously into the heart of the col?
lective hubbub. A similar syntactical effect is left unexploited with respect to
the description ofthe small bulb and the fish scales; and the intense zeugmatic
description of the fishmonger is lost on two occasions in the explicative, prosaic
solution chosen for the English version.
A further example might help to illustrate fully the extent and the detriment
of this syntactical inconstancy:
I a l'ultim vaig entendre que volien dir quan deien aquesta persona es de suro . . .
perque, de suro, ho era jo. No perque fos de suro sino perque em vaig haver de fer de
suro. I el cor de neu. (p. 207)
And finally I understood what they meant when they said 'That person's like a
cork . . .' [!] Because I was like [!] a cork myself. Not because I was born [!] that
way but because I had to force myself to be. And to make my heart like stone. [!] (p. 138)
Here again, the rhythm and full significance of the original are compromised

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670 The English Translation of 'La plaga del Diamant'

not only by the variation in word order but by the translation as well, with the
familiar additions and explications. Repeatedly the force of the metaphor is di-
luted into simile, which not only compromises the poetic intensity and staccato
effect of the expression but also tends to explain rather than translate, as does
the inexplicable rendering of the last image which, given that the expression
'de pedra' exists in Catalan with the same meaning, is all the more confusing.
Also problematic in this case?and again pervasive throughout the novel,
as we have attempted to signal?is the arbitrary inclusion of speech marks.
Natalia's monologue verges on an adapted stream of consciousness technique,
or escriptura parlada in the neat definition of Carme Arnau.13 Thus, everything
is assimilated through the narrator's monologue, which tends to accentuate
the solitude and isolation of the protagonist as she endeavours to fill her inner
void or somehow discover herself with the relentless appropriation of external
phenomenon.
The style of the discourse also reveals the limitations of her experience, as she
is rarely able to look outside herself or her immediate context, trussed up in a
world of verbal interiors. This desperate act of interiorization is exemplified by
the way the direct speech of others is insistently and seamlessly incorporated
into the main body of the narrative. Hence the use of inverted commas in the
target version destroys the effect painstakingly created by author. Again, as is
usual throughout, the reordering of the syntax also compromises the impact of
the original:

I jo vaig preguntar que pas- And I asked what would hap?

saria si mentre un dels grans es pen if the boy lifted the glass
banyava el nen alcava la trapa i and looked in when one of the
mirava. I la senyora va dir, calli. grownups was bathing. [syntax]
(P- 144) And the lady said, 'Be quiet' [!] heaven forbid.
(pp. 84-85)
i a l'ultim va dir, si et fa vergonya despullar-te davant meu, sortire, si no, comencare
jo perque vegis que no n'hi ha per tant [. . .] Tenia els cabells com un bosc, plantats
damunt del cap rodonet. Lluents com xarol. Se'ls pentinava a cops de pinta i cada cop
de pinta se'ls allissava amb l'atra ma. Quan no tenia pinta se'ls pentinava amb els dits de
la mans ben oberts, de pressa, de pressa, com si una ma empaites l'altra [. . .] Les vores
dels ulls sempre les tenia humides, com una mica untades, i li feia molt bonic. (p. 104)
and finally he said, 'If you're embarrassed to get undressed in front of me I'll leave the
room [explicative], and if you're not, I'll go firstso you can see it's no big deal.' [. . .]
His hair was bushy as a jungle [!] and shiny as patent leather [omission, conflation, and
change in punctuation]. He combed it with rough strokes and at each stroke ofthe comb
[conflation] he'd run his fingers through it quickly, as if one hand was chasing the other
[conflation] [. . .] His eyelids were always shiny, as if someone had oiled them [!], and it
made him look handsome. (p. 49)

Quite apart from the intrusion of the speech marks, the rest of what is a very
suggestive passage is lacerated by explication, omission, conflation, and even
addition. In fact, the target version strays so significantly from the original that
one begins to wonder whether redrafting is as much an issue for Rosenthal
as translation. Unfortunately, as has been repeatedly seen from the quotations
13 As cited
by Josep Antoni Fluixa in his introductionto our edition (p. 51). Arnau's seminal
studyof Rodoredais Introduccioa la narrativade Merce Rodoreda(Barcelona: Edicions 62, 1979).

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 DOMINIC KEOWN 671

cited throughout this paper, such editorial revision is by no means an isolated

incident.
The above illustration also raises the related issue of format. A feature of
Rodoreda's style?and, perhaps, one of its distinguishing features as escriptura
parlada rather than conventional stream of consciousness?is the setting out
of the novel into forty-nine short and self-contained chapters stretching from
roughly two to five pages in length with a blank space, usually of a page,
signalling the division along with Roman numerals as heading. In this confi-
guration, Colometa's discourse runs virtually without truncation with perhaps
one or at most two paragraph breaks. It is not unusual in the target version,
however, for this interstice to be doubled arbitrarily. What is more, the divisions
into chapters are ignored, the separation being effected merely by a space of
some four lines emphasized by a bold initial in a large font size.14
Of course it is always difficult to know the extent of editorial involvement
in this type of reconfiguration. Such decisions may well have lain outside the
competence ofthe translator. What is patent, however, is that the author's voice
is never really afforded the opportunity to be heard as clearly or distinctively
as in the original. Similarly, Rodoreda's own ideas about the interface between
content and format and how best this might suit the idiosyncrasy of her narrative
are evidently not taken into account.15
We are thus left with the overall impression that, though commercially suc?
cessful and, in general, competent in its rendering ofthe literality ofthe original,
the strategies adopted by Rosenthal in his translation of La placa del Diamant
fail to allow Rodoreda's classic to achieve that lyrical quality in the target lan?
guage that is so impressively evident in the Catalan. Explication, conflation,
addition, and changes in punctuation, format, and syntax all conspire to en-
feeble the singular expressive style which is such a feature of the novel. In the
final analysis, the demotic down-to-earth lyricism may still be perceived but
is somehow dampened by the criteria imposed by the translator, who rarely
allows the idiom to define itself with the fluent poeticitat of the original.
Unhappily, it appears at times almost as if the translation tends towards
some type of revisionary exercise. Indeed, the stylistic tension we perceive
between original and target versions is evinced quite starkly?and also most
revealingly?in the online publicity afforded by Graywolf Press, which, in
conformity with its own in-house usage, advertises the work in the following
manner:

14 Here we mightalso citethelack ofRodoreda's own

prologue,whichhas prefacedeveryedition
since 1982. Though thisobviouslyappeared afterthe firstanglophonehardbackeditionof 1981, it
would have been beneficialand considerateto include theauthor'swords,say,in thefirstpaperback
editionof 1986.
15 The noticeableintrusionand of the translatedversionnaturallyraise the question
redrafting
ofthetensionbetweengenderedformsofwriting.Evidentlythemale reconfiguration ofthefemale
narrativehereoffersa poignantperspectiveforscrutinywhich,unfortunately, lies outsidetherealm
of this study.For a comprehensiveoverview of the issues involved in this debate, however,see
BiruteCiplijauskaite,La novelafemininacontempordnea (Barcelona: Anthropos,1988).

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672 The English Translation of 'La plafa del Diamant'

The Time of the Doves

by David Rosenthal and Merce Rodoreda16

Needless to say, for the translator to take precedence over the author is, in many
ways, to put the cart before the horse. Indeed, the formula becomes increasingly
disconcerting if we consider Ulysses, for example, being authored in Catalan by
4 *
Josep Mallafre and James Joyce'; or Sonnets by Gerard Verges and William
Shakespeare'. The reference, however, is certainly indicative ofthe intrusive
intent we have attempted to signal throughout this paper. Finally, we are left
with the impression, purely and simply, that an elementary and straightforward
rendering of La plafa del Diamant might well have proved less problematic and
more impactful, allowing the narrative voice to resonate as engagingly in the
target version as it does in the original.
Fitzwilliam College, Cambridge Dominic Keown

[accessed 13 January2005].
www.graywolfpress.org

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