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Magazine La Vanguardia

Sus negros ojos brillan con felicidad desbordante, procurando no perderse la m�s
m�nima de las reacciones del p�blico. Su hambriento ego lo agradece todo - da igual
si la abuchean o insultan - todo es bienvenido mientras se refiera a ella. Ella es
un nuevo personaje medi�tico surgido del vac�o.

En el lapso de unas semanas ha conocido una ef�mera y ansiada fama y ahora se


encuentra en el paroxismo de sus expectativas. Es la invitada m�s esperada de un
programa televisivo dedicado a la explotaci�n �compra/venta- de vidas privadas
reales e inventadas. Se dispone con placer a ser a la vez destripada, vapuleada,
revolcada y aupada por el precio de una respetable suma. Pero no es el dinero lo
que la exalta, es la notoriedad, ha logrado ser famosa. �Qu� m�s puede pedir una
narcisista? El televidente espa�ol ahora tiene la oportunidad de empaparse de una
nueva patolog�a o quiz�s de su caricatura: la imagen de un narcisista.

El mito de Narciso.
El origen del concepto narcisista proviene de la mitolog�a griega. Concretamente
del mito de Narciso, descrito por diversos autores con distintos matices. La
versi�n m�s antigua es la narrada por Ovidio (43 a. C.) en su libro III de las
�Metamorfosis�. Cuenta la leyenda que Narciso era el hermoso hijo de la ninfa
Lir�ope, fruto de la violaci�n del dios del r�o, Cefiso. Su madre consult� al
adivino Tiresias sobre el futuro de su hijo. El le vaticin� que vivir�a una larga
vida si no llegaba nunca a conocerse a s� mismo.

Desde joven, su extraordinaria belleza atrae a j�venes y muchachas. Entre ellos


despierta el amor apasionado de la ninfa Eco. Su orgullo le hace rechazar con
desprecio e indiferencia a todos los que le aman. Uno de los desde�ados pide
clemencia y castigo a N�mesis, la diosa de la venganza. Esta, entonces se dispone a
castigar a Narciso y, hace que, al inclinarse �ste a beber de una fuente, observe
su imagen en el agua y se enamore instant�neamente de su propio reflejo. Esto le
lleva a consumirse por su pasi�n y muere transform�ndose despu�s en una flor que se
llamar�a narciso.

Un narcisista t�pico

� Grandiosidad. Posee un enorme sentido de auto importancia. Exagera los logros y


capacidades, espera ser reconocido como superior sin mostrar unos logros
proporcionados. Atribuye los fracasos a causas externas.
� Exige aprobaci�n y admiraci�n de los dem�s.
� Vive absorto en fantas�as de �xito ilimitado, poder, brillantez, belleza o amor.
� Desprecia a la pareja. Cree merecer lo que recibe sin tener que corresponder.
Desea ser el centro de su vida.
� Cree ser �especial� y �nico, y que s�lo puede ser comprendido por - o solo puede
relacionarse con - otras personas o instituciones que son especiales o de alto
status.
� Posee expectativas no razonables de recibir un trato de favor especial o de que
se cumplan autom�ticamente sus expectativas.
� Manipulaci�n interpersonal. Se aprovecha de los dem�s para alcanzar sus propias
metas.
� Carencia de empat�a: es incapaz de reconocer o identificarse con los sentimientos
y necesidades de los dem�s.
� Frecuente envidia o ideas de ser envidiado.
� Comportamientos arrogantes y soberbios. Intolerancia a las cr�ticas. Reacci�n de
rabia y ofensa. Devaluaci�n del otro.

C�mo reconocer a un narcisista.


No siempre los personajes cotidianos padecen un Trastorno Narcisista de la
Personalidad como patolog�a psiqui�trica. Muchos de ellos son personas con rasgos
narcisistas de car�cter que se encuentran repartidas amparadas por camuflaje en
nuestro lugar de trabajo en forma de jefe, o como figura medi�tica que aparece en
todas partes, o bien en nuestra vida privada, como el amigo que nunca deja de
hablar de sus planes y �xitos sin dejar el turno de la palabra. Quiz� tenemos una
relaci�n afectiva con un explotador carente de empat�a que no sospech�bamos que
podr�a ser un narcisista.

El fil�sofo y economista israel�, Sam Vaknin, ha teorizado y estudiado el fen�meno


desde todos sus prismas y matices. En su libro �Malignant Self-Love� describe toda
la gama crom�tica narcisista, pero advierte que no todos los casos son patol�gicos
ya que muchos son personajes engendrados por nuestra sociedad actual de corte
neoliberal y postmoderno. Por tanto, personalidades inspiradas por nuestra cultura.

Antes de encontrarse engullidos y victimizados por esa personalidad avasalladora y


eg�latra, convendr�a conocer sus manifestaciones.

� Carencia de empat�a . Incapacidad o resistencia a identificarse, reconocer o


aceptar los sentimientos, necesidades, preferencias, prioridades y elecciones del
otro.
� Lenguaje corporal altanero . La postura f�sica exuda superioridad, se�or�o,
poderes ocultos, misterio, estudiada indiferencia, etc. Aunque el narcisista suele
mantener el contacto visual, se abstiene de la proximidad f�sica (conserva su
territorio). Su actuaci�n social puede ser bromista y condescendiente, desde una
posici�n se supremac�a. Concede el privilegio de su presencia. A veces puede
mantenerse como simple observador.
� Merecedor de trato especial . Siempre trata de obtener consideraci�n especial de
alg�n tipo: no esperar en las colas, o que el psic�logo le considere �distinto�,
hablar directamente con gente de autoridad pasando por alto secretarias y porteros
o conseguir condiciones de pago especiales y a medida. Tambi�n suele requerir al
maitre en el restaurante o monopolizar al camarero. En caso de que se le nieguen
estas prebendas reacciona col�ricamente y con indignaci�n.
� Idealizaci�n o devaluaci�n . El narcisista clasifica instant�neamente a su
interlocutor, idealiz�ndolo o devalu�ndolo. Todo depende de si este posee potencial
como �suministro de alimento para su ego�. Si no es as� puede ser humillante e
hiriente.
� Pertenencia al club. El narcisista necesita y trata de �pertenecer�a todos los
grupos. Por ejemplo, si est� habl�ndole al m�dico, de entrada le dice que no ha
estudiado medicina, para seguidamente darle un discurso versado sobre el tema de
consulta. De este modo intenta dejar al profesional impresionado por su
inteligencia excepcional. Jam�s reconoce su ignorancia en ning�n campo, aunque
suele tocar de o�do y no es dif�cil �pescarlo�.
� Falsa biograf�a y fanfarroner�a . Su discurso est� plagado de �yo�, �mi� y �m�o�.
Se describe como inteligente, o rico, o humilde, o intuitivo o creativo, pero
siempre en grado excesivo, no plausible y extraordinario. Su biograf�a suena
excepcionalmente rica y compleja. Sus logros denotan desproporci�n con su edad,
educaci�n y renombre. Su condici�n real es demostradamente incompatible con sus
asertos. Muchas veces sus fantas�as y mentiras se detectan con facilidad. Desliza
nombres de gente importante y se apropia de las experiencias y �xitos de los dem�s.

� Lenguaje desprovisto de emoci�n . Le gusta hablar sobre �l mismo y de nadie m�s


que de �l. No se interesa por los dem�s o lo que tienen que decir, a no ser que
sean potenciales �suministradores de alimento para su ego�. Se muestra aburrido,
desde�oso e incluso enfadado si abusan de su preciado tiempo. En general el
narcisista es impaciente, se aburre f�cilmente y distrae su atenci�n si no es �l el
tema de la conversaci�n. En caso de que alguien se interese por sus emociones, el
narcisista suele hablar en tercera persona, intelectualizar o ironizar.
� Seriedad y reverencia por s� mismo . Puede mostrar un excelente sentido del
humor, ir�nico y agudo, pero raramente a costa de s� mismo. La importancia de su
misi�n en la vida es c�smica, de consecuencias globales. Por ejemplo si es
cient�fico, su investigaci�n es crucial para la humanidad y va a revolucionar la
ciencia. Por eso, el narcisista se ofende f�cilmente y se siente insultado (la
herida narcisista). Cualquier comentario puede ser interpretado por �l como
despreciativo. Su tiempo es m�s valioso que el de los dem�s y no puede
desperdiciarse en las relaciones sociales.
Los ofrecimientos de ayuda o consejo son interpretados como humillaci�n indicando
que �l no es perfecto dado necesita consejo. Muestra reacciones de paranoia.

Todos estos rasgos, la falta de empat�a, la distancia, el desd�n, el sentido de


merecimiento, la falta de sentido del humor consigo mismo, el trato discriminativo
y la paranoia, hacen del personaje narcisista alguien que provoca rechazo en los
grupos e incluso en los terapeutas. Se le considera muy poco apto para la relaci�n
social. Su presencia suele provocar incomodidad en las personas que lo tratan. No
importa cu�n encantador, inteligente, incisivo, extrovertido sea, le falla
asegurarse la simpat�a de sus cong�neres. Una simpat�a que �l tampoco est�
dispuesto a repartir.

La sociedad actual como productora de narcisismo.

Personalidades narcisistas parecen haber proliferado como setas en las �ltimas dos
d�cadas, reflejando lo que algunos estudiosos han llamado la �generaci�n del yo� en
el contexto capitalista norteamericano. La obra del at�pico pensador norteamericano
marxista, Christopher Lasch, publicada hace casi 25 a�os, �La cultura del
narcisismo� afirma que el narcisismo ser�a el principal s�ntoma del declive y
crisis del capitalismo. El hombre psicol�gico actual, afirma, ser�a el producto
final del individualismo burgu�s. Esto dar�a lugar al esp�ritu competitivo y el
excesivo individualismo, a la cultura de la diferencia que separa y enorgullece a
una elite, el desarrollo de lo propio o privacidad, la incapacidad para aceptar la
vejez o la limitaci�n humana y la necesidad de �xito y reconocimiento que se
observa en las relaciones tanto comerciales como privadas. A esto podemos a�adir la
legitimaci�n de las guerras para defender lo �propio�, sean creencias, dioses o
concepto del bien y del mal. Cabe admirar la clarividencia de este soci�logo y
cr�tico social, ya que muchas de sus observaciones no solo siguen vigentes, sino
que se han potenciado con la globalizaci�n.

En su ensayo�Narcisismo: epidemia de nuestro tiempo�, Jos� Luis Trechera afirma que


�el narcisismo no es un fen�meno exclusivo del modo de vida estadounidense. La
postmodernidad ha reforzado el modelo de hombre narcisista. En Europa se ha
producido la segunda revoluci�n individualista, se ha suplido la �tica por la
est�tica; de la implicaci�n y compromiso personal se ha pasado a la sociedad del
contrato temporal, del gran fragmento (grandes valores) se ha desembocado en el
peque�o fragmento. (�) Ante la carencia de un proyecto universal, el hombre
occidental se refugia en la subjetividad, en la esfera privada y en el culto a la
individualidad. Cada sujeto es el centro del mundo y del universo. Nuestra
civilizaci�n occidental se caracteriza por perder de vista las necesidades del
otro. A pesar de tener miles de ventanas para observar el entorno, no capta la
realidad externa. Por tener una anestesia social, vemos los hechos sin que nos
afecten o interpelen. Es una cultura del yo en primer lugar.�

La verdad del narcisista

� Debajo de su inflado ego, el narcisista posee una autoestima deficiente, no cree


en su val�a personal y muestra una gran inmadurez emocional.
� Intenta ocultar su inseguridad mediante otro �yo� m�s aceptable y digno de
admiraci�n, m�s acorde con sus deseos.
� Debido a que el falso �yo� es una construcci�n suya, necesita �alimento para su
ego� continuamente, mediante la aprobaci�n y elogios de los dem�s. Como la
admiraci�n suele ser hacia su �yo� grandioso y falso, esta nunca llega a aumentar
su autoestima.
� Reacciona con rabia a la cr�tica porque esta puede f�cilmente destruir su fr�gil
seguridad. � Su falta de empat�a proviene de estar centrado en s� mismo y por su
dificultad para reconocer a los dem�s como individuos separados con sus propias
necesidades (inmadurez emocional).

Sobrevivir con un narcisista

� Saber crear la distancia emocional adecuada . �Ni tan cerca que te queme ni tan
lejos que te hiele�. Para sentirse bien consigo mismo y seguir crey�ndose superior,
el narcisista tiene que rebajar y humillar a las personas que le quieren.
� Ser consciente de la inutilidad de esperar que cambie . Es m�s f�cil cambiar el
propio comportamiento (no ofenderse, no dar importancia a sus palabras) que pedirle
que cambie.
� Permitir que sea el centro de atenci�n de vez en cuando . Es bueno recordar que
en el fondo es una persona que se cree sin valor e indigna de ser amada por s�
misma.
� Prepararse para ser ignorado cuando se le expresen sentimientos . El narcisista
no estar� por la labor de consolar al compa�ero o amigo si este se siente
deprimido. Es mejor no pedir peras al olmo y buscar otro hombro para llorar.

�Hay esperanza?

Al ser el narcisismo un rasgo de personalidad t�pico de personas inmaduras que se


han estacionado en una etapa infantil en la que el narcisismo es algo normal, cabe
esperar que el tiempo, las desilusiones y algunas circunstancias vitales hagan
parte del trabajo de mejor�a.

� Es recomendable cortarle sus �suministros de alimento para el ego� y precipitarle


una crisis o una llamada �herida narcisista�.
� A partir de ah�, aprovechar esta brecha para lograr que se someta a una terapia
con el fin de que llegue a madurar emocionalmente.
� Puede esperarse que los logros y reconocimientos con base real consigan aumentar
su sentimiento de val�a y reducir la fantas�a de grandiosidad.
� Puede ser de gran ayuda que consiga mantener una relaci�n estable con una pareja
segura de si misma, que lo acepte tal como es sin intentar cambiarlo y que le
transmita seguridad. Hay que advertir que se les hace bastante dif�cil encontrar a
alguien.
� Las desilusiones de la vida junto a los �xitos de contenido real pueden abocar en
un reajuste de la percepci�n que tiene de s� mismo.

NARCISSISTIC AND PSYCHOPATHIC LEADERS


"(The leader's) intellectual acts are strong and independent even in isolation and
his will need no reinforcement from others ... (He) loves no one but himself, or
other people only insofar as they serve his needs."
Freud, Sigmund, "Group Psychology and the Analysis of the Ego"

"It was precisely that evening in Lodi that I came to believe in myself as an
unusual person and became consumed with the ambition to do the great things that
until then had been but a fantasy."
(Napoleon Bonaparte, "Thoughts")

"They may all e called Heroes, in as much as they have derived their purposes and
their vocation not from the calm regular course of things, sanctioned by the
existing order, but from a concealed fount, from that inner Spirit, still hidden
beneath the surface, which impinges on the outer world as a shell and bursts it
into pieces - such were Alexander, Caesar, Napoleon ... World-historical men - the
Heroes of an epoch - must therefore be recognized as its clear-sighted ones: their
deeds, their words are the best of their time ... Moral claims which are irrelevant
must not be brought into collision with World-historical deeds ... So mighty a form
must trample down many an innocent flower - crush to pieces many an object in its
path."
(G.W.F. Hegel, "Lectures on the Philosophy of History")

"Such beings are incalculable, they come like fate without cause or reason,
inconsiderately and without pretext. Suddenly they are here like lightning too
terrible, too sudden, too compelling and too 'different' even to be hated ... What
moves them is the terrible egotism of the artist of the brazen glance, who knows
himself to be justified for all eternity in his 'work' as the mother is justified
in her child ...

In all great deceivers a remarkable process is at work to which they owe their
power. In the very act of deception with all its preparations, the dreadful voice,
expression, and gestures, they are overcome by their belief in themselves; it is
this belief which then speaks, so persuasively, so miracle-like, to the audience."
(Friedrich Nietzsche, "The Genealogy of Morals")

"He knows not how to rule a kingdom, that cannot manage a province; nor can he
wield a province, that cannot order a city; nor he order a city, that knows not how
to regulate a village; nor he a village, that cannot guide a family; nor can that
man govern well a family that knows not how to govern himself; neither can any
govern himself unless his reason be lord, will and appetite her vassals; nor can
reason rule unless herself be ruled by God, and be obedient to Him."
(Hugo Grotius)

The narcissistic leader is the culmination and reification of his period, culture,
and civilization. He is likely to rise to prominence in narcissistic societies.

Read more about collective narcissism HERE.

The malignant narcissist invents and then projects a false, fictitious, self for
the world to fear, or to admire. He maintains a tenuous grasp on reality to start
with and this is further exacerbated by the trappings of power. The narcissist's
grandiose self-delusions and fantasies of omnipotence and omniscience are supported
by real life authority and the narcissist's predilection to surround himself with
obsequious sycophants.

The narcissist's personality is so precariously balanced that he cannot tolerate


even a hint of criticism and disagreement. Most narcissists are paranoid and suffer
from ideas of reference (the delusion that they are being mocked or discussed when
they are not). Thus, narcissists often regard themselves as "victims of
persecution".

The narcissistic leader fosters and encourages a personality cult with all the
hallmarks of an institutional religion: priesthood, rites, rituals, temples,
worship, catechism, mythology. The leader is this religion's ascetic saint. He
monastically denies himself earthly pleasures (or so he claims) in order to be able
to dedicate himself fully to his calling.

The narcissistic leader is a monstrously inverted Jesus, sacrificing his life and
denying himself so that his people - or humanity at large - should benefit. By
surpassing and suppressing his humanity, the narcissistic leader became a distorted
version of Nietzsche's "superman".

Many narcissistic and psychopathic leaders are the hostages of self-imposed rigid
ideologies. They fancy themselves Platonic "philosopher-kings". Lacking empathy,
they regard their subjects as a manufacturer does his raw materials, or as the
abstracted collateral damage in vast historical processes (to prepare an omelet,
one must break eggs, as their favorite saying goes).

But being a-human or super-human also means being a-sexual and a-moral.

In this restricted sense, narcissistic leaders are post-modernist and moral


relativists. They project to the masses an androgynous figure and enhance it by
engendering the adoration of nudity and all things "natural" - or by strongly
repressing these feelings. But what they refer to as "nature" is not natural at
all.

The narcissistic leader invariably proffers an aesthetic of decadence and evil


carefully orchestrated and artificial - though it is not perceived this way by him
or by his followers. Narcissistic leadership is about reproduced copies, not about
originals. It is about the manipulation of symbols - not about veritable atavism or
true conservatism.

In short: narcissistic leadership is about theatre, not about life. To enjoy the
spectacle (and be subsumed by it), the leader demands the suspension of judgment,
depersonalization, and de-realization. Catharsis is tantamount, in this
narcissistic dramaturgy, to self-annulment.

Narcissism is nihilistic not only operationally, or ideologically. Its very


language and narratives are nihilistic. Narcissism is conspicuous nihilism - and
the cult's leader serves as a role model, annihilating the Man, only to re-appear
as a pre-ordained and irresistible force of nature.

Narcissistic leadership often poses as a rebellion against the "old ways" - against
the hegemonic culture, the upper classes, the established religions, the
superpowers, the corrupt order. Narcissistic movements are puerile, a reaction to
narcissistic injuries inflicted upon a narcissistic (and rather psychopathic)
toddler nation-state, or group, or upon the leader.

Minorities or "others" - often arbitrarily selected - constitute a perfect, easily


identifiable, embodiment of all that is "wrong". They are accused of being old,
they are eerily disembodied, they are cosmopolitan, they are part of the
establishment, they are "decadent", they are hated on religious and socio-economic
grounds, or because of their race, sexual orientation, origin.

They are different, they are narcissistic (feel and act as morally superior), they
are everywhere, they are defenceless, they are credulous, they are adaptable (and
thus can be co-opted to collaborate in their own destruction). They are the perfect
hate figure. Narcissists thrive on hatred and pathological envy.

This is precisely the source of the fascination with Hitler, diagnosed by Erich
Fromm - together with Stalin - as a malignant narcissist. He was an inverted human.
His unconscious was his conscious. He acted out our most repressed drives,
fantasies, and wishes.

Hitler provided us with a glimpse of the horrors that lie beneath the veneer, the
barbarians at our personal gates, and what it was like before we invented
civilization. Hitler forced us all through a time warp and many did not emerge. He
was not the devil. He was one of us. He was what Arendt aptly called the banality
of evil. Just an ordinary, mentally disturbed, failure, a member of a mentally
disturbed and failing nation, who lived through disturbed and failing times. He was
the perfect mirror, a channel, a voice, and the very depth of our souls.

The narcissistic leader prefers the sparkle and glamour of well-orchestrated


illusions to the tedium and method of real accomplishments. His reign is all smoke
and mirrors, devoid of substances, consisting of mere appearances and mass
delusions.

In the aftermath of his regime - the narcissistic leader having died, been deposed,
or voted out of office - it all unravels. The tireless and constant
prestidigitation ceases and the entire edifice crumbles. What looked like an
economic miracle turns out to have been a fraud-laced bubble. Loosely-held empires
disintegrate. Laboriously assembled business conglomerates go to pieces. "Earth
shattering" and "revolutionary" scientific discoveries and theories are
discredited. Social experiments end in mayhem.

As their end draws near, narcissistic-psychopathic leaders act out, lash out,
erupt. They attack with equal virulence and ferocity compatriots, erstwhile allies,
neighbors, and foreigners.

It is important to understand that the use of violence must be ego-syntonic. It


must accord with the self-image of the narcissist. It must abet and sustain his
grandiose fantasies and feed his sense of entitlement. It must conform with the
narcissistic narrative.

All populist, charismatic leaders believe that they have a "special connection"
with the "people": a relationship that is direct, almost mystical, and transcends
the normal channels of communication (such as the legislature or the media). Thus,
a narcissist who regards himself as the benefactor of the poor, a member of the
common folk, the representative of the disenfranchised, the champion of the
dispossessed against the corrupt elite, is highly unlikely to use violence at
first.

The pacific mask crumbles when the narcissist has become convinced that the very
people he purported to speak for, his constituency, his grassroots fans, the prime
sources of his narcissistic supply - have turned against him. At first, in a
desperate effort to maintain the fiction underlying his chaotic personality, the
narcissist strives to explain away the sudden reversal of sentiment. "The people
are being duped by (the media, big industry, the military, the elite, etc.)", "they
don't really know what they are doing", "following a rude awakening, they will
revert to form", etc.

When these flimsy attempts to patch a tattered personal mythology fail - the
narcissist is injured. Narcissistic injury inevitably leads to narcissistic rage
and to a terrifying display of unbridled aggression. The pent-up frustration and
hurt translate into devaluation. That which was previously idealized - is now
discarded with contempt and hatred.
This primitive defense mechanism is called "splitting". To the narcissist, things
and people are either entirely bad (evil) or entirely good. He projects onto others
his own shortcomings and negative emotions, thus becoming a totally good object. A
narcissistic leader is likely to justify the butchering of his own people by
claiming that they intended to kill him, undo the revolution, devastate the
economy, or the country, etc.

The "small people", the "rank and file", the "loyal soldiers" of the narcissist -
his flock, his nation, his employees - they pay the price. The disillusionment and
disenchantment are agonizing. The process of reconstruction, of rising from the
ashes, of overcoming the trauma of having been deceived, exploited and manipulated
- is drawn-out. It is difficult to trust again, to have faith, to love, to be led,
to collaborate. Feelings of shame and guilt engulf the erstwhile followers of the
narcissist. This is his sole legacy: a massive post-traumatic stress disorder.

"I came here to see a country, but what I find is a theater ... In appearances,
everything happens as it does everywhere else. There is no difference except in the
very foundation of things."
(de Custine, writing about Russia in the mid-19th century)

Four decades ago, the Polish-American-Jewish author, Jerzy Kosinski, wrote the book
"Being There". It describes the election to the presidency of the United States of
a simpleton, a gardener, whose vapid and trite pronouncements are taken to be
sagacious and penetrating insights into human affairs. The "Being There Syndrome"
is now manifest throughout the world: from Russia (Putin) to the United States
(Obama).

Given a high enough level of frustration, triggered by recurrent, endemic, and


systemic failures in all spheres of policy, even the most resilient democracy
develops a predilection to "strong men", leaders whose self-confidence, sangfroid,
and apparent omniscience all but "guarantee" a change of course for the better.

These are usually people with a thin resume, having accomplished little prior to
their ascendance. They appear to have erupted on the scene from nowhere. They are
received as providential messiahs precisely because they are unencumbered with a
discernible past and, thus, are ostensibly unburdened by prior affiliations and
commitments. Their only duty is to the future. They are a-historical: they have no
history and they are above history.

Indeed, it is precisely this apparent lack of a biography that qualifies these


leaders to represent and bring about a fantastic and grandiose future. They act as
a blank screen upon which the multitudes project their own traits, wishes, personal
biographies, needs, and yearnings.

The more these leaders deviate from their initial promises and the more they fail,
the dearer they are to the hearts of their constituents: like them, their new-
chosen leader is struggling, coping, trying, and failing and, like them, he has his
shortcomings and vices. This affinity is endearing and captivating. It helps to
form a shared psychosis (follies-a-plusieurs) between ruler and people and fosters
the emergence of an hagiography.

The propensity to elevate narcissistic or even psychopathic personalities to power


is most pronounced in countries that lack a democratic tradition (such as China,
Russia, or the nations that inhabit the territories that once belonged to Byzantium
or the Ottoman Empire).

Cultures and civilizations which frown upon individualism and have a collectivist
tradition, prefer to install "strong collective leaderships" rather than "strong
men". Yet, all these polities maintain a theatre of democracy, or a theatre of
"democratically-reached consensus" (Putin calls it: "sovereign democracy"). Such
charades are devoid of essence and proper function and are replete and concurrent
with a personality cult or the adoration of the party in power

In most developing countries and nations in transition, "democracy" is an empty


word. Granted, the hallmarks of democracy are there: candidate lists, parties,
election propaganda, a plurality of media, and voting. But its quiddity is absent.
The democratic principles are institutions are being consistently hollowed out and
rendered mock by election fraud, exclusionary policies, cronyism, corruption,
intimidation, and collusion with Western interests, both commercial and political.

The new "democracies" are thinly-disguised and criminalized plutocracies (recall


the Russian oligarchs), authoritarian regimes (Central Asia and the Caucasus), or
puppeteered heterarchies (Macedonia, Bosnia, and Iraq, to mention three recent
examples).

The new "democracies" suffer from many of the same ills that afflict their veteran
role models: murky campaign finances; venal revolving doors between state
administration and private enterprise; endemic corruption, nepotism, and cronyism;
self-censoring media; socially, economically, and politically excluded minorities;
and so on. But while this malaise does not threaten the foundations of the United
States and France - it does imperil the stability and future of the likes of
Ukraine, Serbia, and Moldova, Indonesia, Mexico, and Bolivia.

Many nations have chosen prosperity over democracy. Yes, the denizens of these
realms can't speak their mind or protest or criticize or even joke lest they be
arrested or worse - but, in exchange for giving up these trivial freedoms, they
have food on the table, they are fully employed, they receive ample health care and
proper education, they save and spend to their hearts' content.

In return for all these worldly and intangible goods (popularity of the leadership
which yields political stability; prosperity; security; prestige abroad; authority
at home; a renewed sense of nationalism, collective and community), the citizens of
these countries forgo the right to be able to criticize the regime or change it
once every four years. Many insist that they have struck a good bargain - not a
Faustian one.

Narcissistic Leaders: The Incredible Pros, the Inevitable Cons


Michael Maccoby

When Michael Maccoby wrote this article, which was first published in early 2000,
the business world was still under the spell of the Internet and its revolutionary
promise. It was a time, Maccoby wrote, that called for larger-than-life leaders who
could see the big picture and paint a compelling portrait of a dramatically
different future. And that, he argued, was one reason we saw the emergence of the
superstar CEOs�the grandiose, actively self-promoting, and genuinely narcissistic
leaders who dominated the covers of business magazines at that time. Skilled
orators and creative strategists, narcissists have vision and a great ability to
attract and inspire followers.

The times have changed, and we�ve learned a lot about the dangers of overreliance
on big personalities, but that doesn�t mean narcissism can�t be a useful leadership
trait. There�s certainly a dark side to narcissism�narcissists, Freud told us, are
emotionally isolated and highly distrustful. They�re usually poor listeners and
lack empathy. Perceived threats can trigger rage. The challenge today�as Maccoby
understood it to be four years ago�is to take advantage of their strengths while
tempering their weaknesses.

There�s something new and daring about the CEOs who are transforming today�s
industries. Just compare them with the executives who ran large companies in the
1950s through the 1980s. Those executives shunned the press and had their comments
carefully crafted by corporate PR departments. But today�s CEOs�superstars such as
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezos, and Jack Welch�hire their own
publicists, write books, grant spontaneous interviews, and actively promote their
personal philosophies. Their faces adorn the covers of magazines like BusinessWeek,
Time, and the Economist. What�s more, the world�s business personalities are
increasingly seen as the makers and shapers of our public and personal agendas.
They advise schools on what kids should learn and lawmakers on how to invest the
public�s money. We look to them for thoughts on everything from the future of e-
commerce to hot places to vacation.

There are many reasons today�s business leaders have higher profiles than ever
before. One is that business plays a much bigger role in our lives than it used to,
and its leaders are more often in the limelight. Another is that the business world
is experiencing enormous changes that call for visionary and charismatic
leadership. But my 25 years of consulting both as a psychoanalyst in private
practice and as an adviser to top managers suggest a third reason�namely, a
pronounced change in the personality of the strategic leaders at the top. As an
anthropologist, I try to understand people in the context in which they operate,
and as a psychoanalyst, I tend to see them through a distinctly Freudian lens.
Given what I know, I believe that the larger-than-life leaders we are seeing today
closely resemble the personality type that Sigmund Freud dubbed narcissistic.
�People of this type impress others as being �personalities,�� he wrote, describing
one of the psychological types that clearly fall within the range of normality.
�They are especially suited to act as a support for others, to take on the role of
leaders, and to give a fresh stimulus to cultural development or damage the
established state of affairs.�

Throughout history, narcissists have always emerged to inspire people and to shape
the future. When military, religious, and political arenas dominated society, it
was figures such as Napol�on Bonaparte, Mahatma Gandhi, and Franklin Delano
Roosevelt who determined the social agenda. But from time to time, when business
became the engine of social change, it, too, generated its share of narcissistic
leaders. That was true at the beginning of this century, when men like Andrew
Carnegie, John D. Rockefeller, Thomas Edison, and Henry Ford exploited new
technologies and restructured American industry. And I think it is true again
today.

But Freud recognized that there is a dark side to narcissism. Narcissists, he


pointed out, are emotionally isolated and highly distrustful. Perceived threats can
trigger rage. Achievements can feed feelings of grandiosity. That�s why Freud
thought narcissists were the hardest personality types to analyze. Consider how an
executive at Oracle describes his narcissistic CEO Larry Ellison: �The difference
between God and Larry is that God does not believe he is Larry.� That observation
is amusing, but it is also troubling. Not surprisingly, most people think of
narcissists in a primarily negative way. After all, Freud named the type after the
mythical figure Narcissus, who died because of his pathological preoccupation with
himself.

Yet narcissism can be extraordinarily useful�even necessary. Freud shifted his


views about narcissism over time and recognized that we are all somewhat
narcissistic. More recently, psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut built on Freud�s theories
and developed methods of treating narcissists. Of course, only professional
clinicians are trained to tell if narcissism is normal or pathological. In this
article, I discuss the differences between productive and unproductive narcissism
but do not explore the extreme pathology of borderline conditions and psychosis.

Leaders such as Jack Welch and George Soros are examples of productive narcissists.
They are gifted and creative strategists who see the big picture and find meaning
in the risky challenge of changing the world and leaving behind a legacy. Indeed,
one reason we look to productive narcissists in times of great transition is that
they have the audacity to push through the massive transformations that society
periodically undertakes. Productive narcissists are not only risk takers willing to
get the job done but also charmers who can convert the masses with their rhetoric.
The danger is that narcissism can turn unproductive when, lacking self-knowledge
and restraining anchors, narcissists become unrealistic dreamers. They nurture
grand schemes and harbor the illusion that only circumstances or enemies block
their success. This tendency toward grandiosity and distrust is the Achilles� heel
of narcissists. Because of it, even brilliant narcissists can come under suspicion
for self-involvement, unpredictability, and�in extreme cases�paranoia.

Productive narcissists have the audacity to push through the massive


transformations that society periodically undertakes.

It�s easy to see why narcissistic leadership doesn�t always mean successful
leadership. Consider the case of Volvo�s Pehr Gyllenhammar. He had a dream that
appealed to a broad international audience�a plan to revolutionize the industrial
workplace by replacing the dehumanizing assembly line caricatured in Charlie
Chaplin�s Modern Times. His wildly popular vision called for team-based
craftsmanship. Model factories were built and publicized to international acclaim.
But his success in pushing through these dramatic changes also sowed the seeds for
his downfall. Gyllenhammar started to feel that he could ignore the concerns of his
operational managers. He pursued chancy and expensive business deals, which he
publicized on television and in the press. On one level, you can ascribe
Gyllenhammar�s falling out of touch with his workforce simply to faulty strategy.
But it is also possible to attribute it to his narcissistic personality. His
overestimation of himself led him to believe that others would want him to be the
czar of a multinational enterprise. In turn, these fantasies led him to pursue a
merger with Renault, which was tremendously unpopular with Swedish employees.
Because Gyllenhammar was deaf to complaints about Renault, Swedish managers were
forced to take their case public. In the end, shareholders aggressively rejected
Gyllenhammar�s plan, leaving him with no option but to resign.

Given the large number of narcissists at the helm of corporations today, the
challenge facing organizations is to ensure that such leaders do not self-destruct
or lead the company to disaster. That can take some doing because it is very hard
for narcissists to work through their issues�and virtually impossible for them to
do it alone. Narcissists need colleagues and even therapists if they hope to break
free from their limitations. But because of their extreme independence and self-
protectiveness, it is very difficult to get near them. Kohut maintained that a
therapist would have to demonstrate an extraordinarily profound empathic
understanding and sympathy for the narcissist�s feelings in order to gain his
trust. On top of that, narcissists must recognize that they can benefit from such
help. For their part, employees must learn how to recognize�and work
around�narcissistic bosses. To help them in this endeavor, let�s first take a
closer look at Freud�s theory of personality types.
Three Main Personality Types
While Freud recognized that there are an almost infinite variety of personalities,
he identified three main types: erotic, obsessive, and narcissistic. Most of us
have elements of all three. We are all, for example, somewhat narcissistic. If that
were not so, we would not be able to survive or assert our needs. The point is, one
of the dynamic tendencies usually dominates the others, making each of us react
differently to success and failure.

Freud�s definitions of personality types differed over time. When talking about the
erotic personality type, however, Freud generally did not mean a sexual personality
but rather one for whom loving and above all being loved is most important. This
type of individual is dependent on those people they fear will stop loving them.
Many erotics are teachers, nurses, and social workers. At their most productive,
they are developers of the young as well as enablers and helpers at work. As
managers, they are caring and supportive, but they avoid conflict and make people
dependent on them. They are, according to Freud, outer-directed people.

Obsessives, in contrast, are inner-directed. They are self-reliant and


conscientious. They create and maintain order and make the most effective
operational managers. They look constantly for ways to help people listen better,
resolve conflict, and find win-win opportunities. They buy self-improvement books
such as Stephen Covey�s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Obsessives are
also ruled by a strict conscience�they like to focus on continuous improvement at
work because it fits in with their sense of moral improvement. As entrepreneurs,
obsessives start businesses that express their values, but they lack the vision,
daring, and charisma it takes to turn a good idea into a great one. The best
obsessives set high standards and communicate very effectively. They make sure that
instructions are followed and costs are kept within budget. The most productive are
great mentors and team players. The unproductive and the uncooperative become
narrow experts and rule-bound bureaucrats.

Narcissists, the third type, are independent and not easily impressed. They are
innovators, driven in business to gain power and glory. Productive narcissists are
experts in their industries, but they go beyond it. They also pose the critical
questions. They want to learn everything about everything that affects the company
and its products. Unlike erotics, they want to be admired, not loved. And unlike
obsessives, they are not troubled by a punishing superego, so they are able to
aggressively pursue their goals. Of all the personality types, narcissists run the
greatest risk of isolating themselves at the moment of success. And because of
their independence and aggressiveness, they are constantly looking out for enemies,
sometimes degenerating into paranoia when they are under extreme stress. (For more
on personality types, see the sidebar �Fromm�s Fourth Personality Type.�)

Fromm's Fourth Personality Type

READ MORE
Strengths of the Narcissistic Leader
When it comes to leadership, personality type can be instructive. Erotic
personalities generally make poor managers�they need too much approval. Obsessives
make better leaders�they are your operational managers: critical and cautious. But
it is narcissists who come closest to our collective image of great leaders. There
are two reasons for this: they have compelling, even gripping, visions for
companies, and they have an ability to attract followers.
Great Vision.
I once asked a group of managers to define a leader. �A person with vision� was a
typical response. Productive narcissists understand the vision thing particularly
well, because they are by nature people who see the big picture. They are not
analyzers who can break up big questions into manageable problems; they aren�t
number crunchers either (these are usually the obsessives). Nor do they try to
extrapolate to understand the future�they attempt to create it. To paraphrase
George Bernard Shaw, some people see things as they are and ask why; narcissists
see things that never were and ask why not.

Consider the difference between Bob Allen, a productive obsessive, and Mike
Armstrong, a productive narcissist. In 1997, Allen tried to expand AT&T to
reestablish the end-to-end service of the Bell System by reselling local service
from the regional Bell operating companies (RBOCs). Although this was a worthwhile
endeavor for shareholders and customers, it was hardly earth-shattering. By
contrast, through a strategy of combining voice, telecommunications, and Internet
access by high-speed broadband telecommunication over cable, Mike Armstrong has
�created a new space with his name on it,� as one of his colleagues puts it.
Armstrong is betting that his costly strategy will beat out the RBOC�s less
expensive solution of digital subscriber lines over copper wire. This example
illustrates the different approaches of obsessives and narcissists. The risk
Armstrong took is one that few obsessives would feel comfortable taking. His vision
is galvanizing AT&T. Who but a narcissistic leader could achieve such a thing? As
Napol�on�a classic narcissist�once remarked, �Revolutions are ideal times for
soldiers with a lot of wit�and the courage to act.�

As in the days of the French Revolution, the world is now changing in astounding
ways; narcissists have opportunities they would never have in ordinary times. In
short, today�s narcissistic leaders have the chance to change the very rules of the
game. Consider Robert B. Shapiro, CEO of Monsanto. Shapiro described his vision of
genetically modifying crops as �the single most successful introduction of
technology in the history of agriculture, including the plow� (New York Times,
August 5, 1999). This is certainly a huge claim�there are still many questions
about the safety and public acceptance of genetically engineered fruits and
vegetables. But industries like agriculture are desperate for radical change. If
Shapiro�s gamble is successful, the industry will be transformed in the image of
Monsanto. That�s why he can get away with painting a picture of Monsanto as a
highly profitable �life sciences� company�despite the fact that Monsanto�s stock
has fallen 12% from 1998 to the end of the third quarter of 1999. (During the same
period, the S&P was up 41%.) Unlike Armstrong and Shapiro, it was enough for Bob
Allen to win against his competitors in a game measured primarily by the stock
market. But narcissistic leaders are after something more. They want�and need�to
leave behind a legacy.
Scores of Followers.
Narcissists have vision�but that�s not enough. People in mental hospitals also have
visions. The simplest definition of a leader is someone whom other people follow.
Indeed, narcissists are especially gifted in attracting followers, and more often
than not, they do so through language. Narcissists believe that words can move
mountains and that inspiring speeches can change people. Narcissistic leaders are
often skillful orators, and this is one of the talents that makes them so
charismatic. Indeed, anyone who has seen narcissists perform can attest to their
personal magnetism and their ability to stir enthusiasm among audiences.

Yet this charismatic gift is more of a two-way affair than most people think.
Although it is not always obvious, narcissistic leaders are quite dependent on
their followers�they need affirmation, and preferably adulation. Think of Winston
Churchill�s wartime broadcasts or J.F.K.�s �Ask not what your country can do for
you� inaugural address. The adulation that follows from such speeches bolsters the
self-confidence and conviction of the speakers. But if no one responds, the
narcissist usually becomes insecure, overly shrill, and insistent�just as Ross
Perot did.

Even when people respond positively to a narcissist, there are dangers. That�s
because charisma is a double-edged sword�it fosters both closeness and isolation.
As he becomes increasingly self-assured, the narcissist becomes more spontaneous.
He feels free of constraints. Ideas flow. He thinks he�s invincible. This energy
and confidence further inspire his followers. But the very adulation that the
narcissist demands can have a corrosive effect. As he expands, he listens even less
to words of caution and advice. After all, he has been right before, when others
had their doubts. Rather than try to persuade those who disagree with him, he feels
justified in ignoring them�creating further isolation. The result is sometimes
flagrant risk taking that can lead to catastrophe. In the political realm, there is
no clearer example of this than Bill Clinton.

Weaknesses of the Narcissistic Leader


Despite the warm feelings their charisma can evoke, narcissists are typically not
comfortable with their own emotions. They listen only for the kind of information
they seek. They don�t learn easily from others. They don�t like to teach but prefer
to indoctrinate and make speeches. They dominate meetings with subordinates. The
result for the organization is greater internal competitiveness at a time when
everyone is already under as much pressure as they can possibly stand. Perhaps the
main problem is that the narcissist�s faults tend to become even more pronounced as
he becomes more successful.

Sensitive to Criticism.
Because they are extraordinarily sensitive, narcissistic leaders shun emotions as a
whole. Indeed, perhaps one of the greatest paradoxes in this age of teamwork and
partnering is that the best corporate leader in the contemporary world is the type
of person who is emotionally isolated. Narcissistic leaders typically keep others
at arm�s length. They can put up a wall of defense as thick as the Pentagon. And
given their difficulty with knowing or acknowledging their own feelings, they are
uncomfortable with other people expressing theirs�especially their negative
feelings.

Indeed, even productive narcissists are extremely sensitive to criticism or


slights, which feel to them like knives threatening their self-image and their
confidence in their visions. Narcissists are almost unimaginably thin-skinned. Like
the fairy-tale princess who slept on many mattresses and yet knew she was sleeping
on a pea, narcissists�even powerful CEOs�bruise easily. This is one explanation why
narcissistic leaders do not want to know what people think of them unless it is
causing them a real problem. They cannot tolerate dissent. In fact, they can be
extremely abrasive with employees who doubt them or with subordinates who are tough
enough to fight back. Steve Jobs, for example, publicly humiliates subordinates.
Thus, although narcissistic leaders often say that they want teamwork, what that
means in practice is that they want a group of yes-men. As the more independent-
minded players leave or are pushed out, succession becomes a particular problem.

Poor Listeners.
One serious consequence of this oversensitivity to criticism is that narcissistic
leaders often do not listen when they feel threatened or attacked. Consider the
response of one narcissistic CEO I had worked with for three years who asked me to
interview his immediate team and report back to him on what they were thinking. He
invited me to his summer home to discuss what I had found. �So what do they think
of me?� he asked with seeming nonchalance. �They think you are very creative and
courageous,� I told him, �but they also feel that you don�t listen.� �Excuse me,
what did you say?� he shot back at once, pretending not to hear. His response was
humorous, but it was also tragic.
In a very real way, this CEO could not hear my criticism because it was too painful
to tolerate. Some narcissists are so defensive that they go so far as to make a
virtue of the fact that they don�t listen. As another CEO bluntly put it, �I didn�t
get here by listening to people!� Indeed, on one occasion when this CEO proposed a
daring strategy, none of his subordinates believed it would work. His subsequent
success strengthened his conviction that he had nothing to learn about strategy
from his lieutenants. But success is no excuse for narcissistic leaders not to
listen.
Lack of Empathy.
Best-selling business writers today have taken up the slogan of �emotional
competencies��the belief that successful leadership requires a strongly developed
sense of empathy. But although they crave empathy from others, productive
narcissists are not noted for being particularly empathetic themselves. Indeed,
lack of empathy is a characteristic shortcoming of some of the most charismatic and
successful narcissists, including Bill Gates and Andy Grove. Of course, leaders do
need to communicate persuasively. But a lack of empathy did not prevent some of
history�s greatest narcissistic leaders from knowing how to communicate�and
inspire. Neither Churchill, de Gaulle, Stalin, nor Mao Tse-tung were empathetic.
And yet they inspired people because of their passion and their conviction at a
time when people longed for certainty.

In fact, in times of radical change, lack of empathy can actually be a strength. A


narcissist finds it easier than other personality types to buy and sell companies,
to close and move facilities, and to lay off employees�decisions that inevitably
make many people angry and sad. But narcissistic leaders typically have few
regrets. As one CEO says, �If I listened to my employees� needs and demands, they
would eat me alive.�

Given this lack of empathy, it�s hardly surprising that narcissistic leaders don�t
score particularly well on evaluations of their interpersonal style. What�s more,
neither 360-degree evaluations of their management style nor workshops in listening
will make them more empathic. Narcissists don�t want to change�and as long as they
are successful, they don�t think they have to. They may see the need for
operational managers to get touchy-feely training, but that�s not for them.

There is a kind of emotional intelligence associated with narcissists, but it�s


more street smarts than empathy. Narcissistic leaders are acutely aware of whether
or not people are with them wholeheartedly. They know whom they can use. They can
be brutally exploitative. That�s why, even though narcissists undoubtedly have
�star quality,� they are often unlikable. They easily stir up people against them,
and it is only in tumultuous times, when their gifts are desperately needed, that
people are willing to tolerate narcissists as leaders.

Narcissistic leaders often say that they want teamwork. What that means in practice
is that they want a group of yes-men.

Distaste for Mentoring.


Lack of empathy and extreme independence make it difficult for narcissists to
mentor and be mentored. Generally speaking, narcissistic leaders set very little
store by mentoring. They seldom mentor others, and when they do they typically want
their prot�g�s to be pale reflections of themselves. Even those narcissists like
Jack Welch who are held up as strong mentors are usually more interested in
instructing than in coaching.

Narcissists certainly don�t credit mentoring or educational programs for their own
development as leaders. A few narcissistic leaders such as Bill Gates may find a
friend or consultant�for instance, Warren Buffet, a superproductive obsessive�whom
they can trust to be their guide and confidant. But most narcissists prefer
�mentors� they can control. A 32-year-old marketing vice president, a narcissist
with CEO potential, told me that she had rejected her boss as a mentor. As she put
it, �First of all, I want to keep the relationship at a distance. I don�t want to
be influenced by emotions. Second, there are things I don�t want him to know. I�d
rather hire an outside consultant to be my coach.� Although narcissistic leaders
appear to be at ease with others, they find intimacy�which is a prerequisite for
mentoring�to be difficult. Younger narcissists will establish peer relations with
authority rather than seek a parentlike mentoring relationship. They want results
and are willing to take chances arguing with authority.

An Intense Desire to Compete.


Narcissistic leaders are relentless and ruthless in their pursuit of victory. Games
are not games but tests of their survival skills. Of course, all successful
managers want to win, but narcissists are not restrained by conscience.
Organizations led by narcissists are generally characterized by intense internal
competition. Their passion to win is marked by both the promise of glory and the
primitive danger of extinction. It is a potent brew that energizes companies,
creating a sense of urgency, but it can also be dangerous. These leaders see
everything as a threat. As Andy Grove puts it, brilliantly articulating the
narcissist�s fear, distrust, and aggression, �Only the paranoid survive.� The
concern, of course, is that the narcissist finds enemies that aren�t there�even
among his colleagues.

The Rise and Fall of a Narcissist

READ MORE
Avoiding the Traps
There is very little business literature that tells narcissistic leaders how to
avoid the pitfalls. There are two reasons for this. First, relatively few
narcissistic leaders are interested in looking inward. And second, psychoanalysts
don�t usually get close enough to them, especially in the workplace, to write about
them. (The noted psychoanalyst Harry Levinson is an exception.) As a result, advice
on leadership focuses on obsessives, which explains why so much of it is about
creating teamwork and being more receptive to subordinates. But as we�ve already
seen, this literature is of little interest to narcissists, nor is it likely to
help subordinates understand their narcissistic leaders. The absence of managerial
literature on narcissistic leaders doesn�t mean that it is impossible to devise
strategies for dealing with narcissism. In the course of a long career counseling
CEOs, I have identified three basic ways in which productive narcissists can avoid
the traps of their own personality.
Find a trusted sidekick.
Many narcissists can develop a close relationship with one person, a sidekick who
acts as an anchor, keeping the narcissistic partner grounded. However, given that
narcissistic leaders trust only their own insights and view of reality, the
sidekick has to understand the narcissistic leader and what he is trying to
achieve. The narcissist must feel that this person, or in some cases persons, is
practically an extension of himself. The sidekick must also be sensitive enough to
manage the relationship. Don Quixote is a classic example of a narcissist who was
out of touch with reality but who was constantly saved from disaster by his squire
Sancho Panza. Not surprisingly, many narcissistic leaders rely heavily on their
spouses, the people they are closest to. But dependence on spouses can be risky,
because they may further isolate the narcissistic leader from his company by
supporting his grandiosity and feeding his paranoia. I once knew a CEO in this kind
of relationship with his spouse. He took to accusing loyal subordinates of plotting
against him just because they ventured a few criticisms of his ideas.

It is much better for a narcissistic leader to choose a colleague as his sidekick.


Good sidekicks are able to point out the operational requirements of the
narcissistic leader�s vision and keep him rooted in reality. The best sidekicks are
usually productive obsessives. Gyllenhammar, for instance, was most effective at
Volvo when he had an obsessive COO, H�kan Frisinger, to focus on improving quality
and cost, as well as an obsessive HR director, Berth J�nsson, to implement his
vision. Similarly, Bill Gates can think about the future from the stratosphere
because Steve Ballmer, a tough obsessive president, keeps the show on the road. At
Oracle, CEO Larry Ellison can afford to miss key meetings and spend time on his
boat contemplating a future without PCs because he has a productive obsessive COO
in Ray Lane to run the company for him. But the job of sidekick entails more than
just executing the leader�s ideas. The sidekick also has to get his leader to
accept new ideas. To do this, he must be able to show the leader how the new ideas
fit with his views and serve his interests. (For more on dealing with narcissistic
bosses, see the sidebar �Working for a Narcissist.�)

Working for a Narcissist

READ MORE
Indoctrinate the organization.
The narcissistic CEO wants all his subordinates to think the way he does about the
business. Productive narcissists�people who often have a dash of the obsessive
personality�are good at converting people to their point of view. One of the most
successful at this is GE�s Jack Welch. Welch uses toughness to build a corporate
culture and to implement a daring business strategy, including the buying and
selling of scores of companies. Unlike other narcissistic leaders such as Gates,
Grove, and Ellison, who have transformed industries with new products, Welch was
able to transform his industry by focusing on execution and pushing companies to
the limits of quality and efficiency, bumping up revenues and wringing out costs.
In order to do so, Welch hammers out a huge corporate culture in his own image�a
culture that provides impressive rewards for senior managers and shareholders.

Welch�s approach to culture building is widely misunderstood. Many observers,


notably Noel Tichy in The Leadership Engine, argue that Welch forms his company�s
leadership culture through teaching. But Welch�s �teaching� involves a personal
ideology that he indoctrinates into GE managers through speeches, memos, and
confrontations. Rather than create a dialogue, Welch makes pronouncements (either
be the number one or two company in your market or get out), and he institutes
programs (such as Six Sigma quality) that become the GE party line. Welch�s
strategy has been extremely effective. GE managers must either internalize his
vision, or they must leave. Clearly, this is incentive learning with a vengeance. I
would even go so far as to call Welch�s teaching brainwashing. But Welch does have
the rare insight and know-how to achieve what all narcissistic business leaders are
trying to do�namely, get the organization to identify with them, to think the way
they do, and to become the living embodiment of their companies.

More and more large corporations are getting into bed with narcissists. They are
finding that there is no substitute for narcissistic leaders in an age of
innovation.

Get into analysis.


Narcissists are often more interested in controlling others than in knowing and
disciplining themselves. That�s why, with very few exceptions, even productive
narcissists do not want to explore their personalities with the help of insight
therapies such as psychoanalysis. Yet since Heinz Kohut, there has been a radical
shift in psychoanalytic thinking about what can be done to help narcissists work
through their rage, alienation, and grandiosity. Indeed, if they can be persuaded
to undergo therapy, narcissistic leaders can use tools such as psychoanalysis to
overcome vital character flaws.
Consider the case of one exceptional narcissistic CEO who asked me to help him
understand why he so often lost his temper with subordinates. He lived far from my
home city, and so the therapy was sporadic and very unorthodox. Yet he kept a
journal of his dreams, which we interpreted together either by phone or when we
met. Our analysis uncovered painful feelings of being unappreciated that went back
to his inability to impress a cold father. He came to realize that he demanded an
unreasonable amount of praise and that when he felt unappreciated by his
subordinates, he became furious. Once he understood that, he was able to recognize
his narcissism and even laugh about it. In the middle of our work, he even
announced to his top team that I was psychoanalyzing him and asked them what they
thought of that. After a pregnant pause, one executive vice president piped up,
�Whatever you�re doing, you should keep doing it, because you don�t get so angry
anymore.� Instead of being trapped by narcissistic rage, this CEO was learning how
to express his concerns constructively.

Leaders who can work on themselves in that way tend to be the most productive
narcissists. In addition to being self-reflective, they are also likely to be open,
likable, and good-humored. Productive narcissists have perspective; they are able
to detach themselves and laugh at their irrational needs. Although serious about
achieving their goals, they are also playful. As leaders, they are aware of being
performers. A sense of humor helps them maintain enough perspective and humility to
keep on learning.

The Best and Worst of Times


As I have pointed out, narcissists thrive in chaotic times. In more tranquil times
and places, however, even the most brilliant narcissist will seem out of place. In
his short story The Curfew Tolls, Stephen Vincent Ben�t speculates on what would
have happened to Napol�on if he had been born some 30 years earlier. Retired in
prerevolutionary France, Napol�on is depicted as a lonely artillery major boasting
to a vacationing British general about how he could have beaten the English in
India. The point, of course, is that a visionary born in the wrong time can seem
like a pompous buffoon.
Historically, narcissists in large corporations have been confined to sales
positions, where they use their persuasiveness and imagination to best effect. In
settled times, the problematic side of the narcissistic personality usually
conspires to keep narcissists in their place, and they can typically rise to top
management positions only by starting their own companies or by leaving to lead
upstarts. Consider Joe Nacchio, formerly in charge of both the business and
consumer divisions of AT&T. Nacchio was a supersalesman and a popular leader in the
mid-1990s. But his desire to create a new network for business customers was
thwarted by colleagues who found him abrasive, self-promoting, and ruthlessly
ambitious.

Two years ago, Nacchio left AT&T to become CEO of Qwest, a company that is creating
a long-distance fiber-optic cable network. Nacchio had the credibility�and
charisma�to sell Qwest�s initial public offering to financial markets and gain a
high valuation. Within a short space of time, he turned Qwest into an attractive
target for the RBOCs, which were looking to move into long-distance telephony and
Internet services. Such a sale would have given Qwest�s owners a handsome profit on
their investment. But Nacchio wanted more. He wanted to expand�to compete with
AT&T�and for that he needed local service. Rather than sell Qwest, he chose to make
a bid himself for local telephone operator U.S. West, using Qwest�s highly valued
stock to finance the deal. The market voted on this display of expansiveness with
its feet�Qwest�s stock price fell 40% between last June, when he made the deal, and
the end of the third quarter of 1999. (The S&P index dropped 5.7% during the same
period.)

Like other narcissists, Nacchio likes risk�and sometimes ignores the costs. But
with the dramatic discontinuities going on in the world today, more and more large
corporations are getting into bed with narcissists. They are finding that there is
no substitute for narcissistic leaders in an age of innovation. Companies need
leaders who do not try to anticipate the future so much as create it. But
narcissistic leaders�even the most productive of them�can self-destruct and lead
their organizations terribly astray. For companies whose narcissistic leaders
recognize their limitations, these will be the best of times. For other companies,
these could turn out to be the worst.

A version of this article appeared in the January 2004 issue of Harvard Business
Review.
Michael Maccoby is a globally recognized expert on leadership who has advised,
taught, and studied leaders of companies, unions, governments, healthcare
organizations, and universities in 36 countries. He is President of The Maccoby
Group and author, most recently, of Strategic Intelligence: Conceptual Tools for
Leading Change.

If Humble People Make the Best Leaders, Why Do We Fall for Charismatic Narcissists?
Margarita Mayo

The research is clear: when we choose humble, unassuming people as our leaders, the
world around us becomes a better place.

Humble leaders improve the performance of a company in the long run because they
create more collaborative environments. They have a balanced view of themselves �
both their virtues and shortcomings � and a strong appreciation of others�
strengths and contributions, while being open to new ideas and feedback. These
�unsung heroes� help their believers to build their self-esteem, go beyond their
expectations, and create a community that channels individual efforts into an
organized group that works for the good of the collective.

For example, one study examined 105 small-to-medium-sized companies in the computer
software and hardware industry in the United Studies. The findings revealed that
when a humble CEO is at the helm of a firm, its top management team is more likely
to collaborate and share information, making the most of the firm�s talent.

Another study showed that a leader�s humility can be contagious: when leaders
behave humbly, followers emulate their modest attitude and behavior. A study of 161
teams found that employees following humble leaders were themselves more likely to
admit their mistakes and limitations, share the spotlight by deflecting praise to
others, and be open to new ideas, advice, and feedback.
Yet instead of following the lead of these unsung heroes, we appear hardwired to
search for superheroes: over-glorifying leaders who exude charisma.

The Greek word Kharisma means �divine gift,� and charisma is the quality of
extraordinary charm, magnetism, and presence that makes a person capable of
inspiring others with enthusiasm and devotion. German sociologist Max Weber defined
charisma as �of divine origin or as exemplary, and on the basis of it, the
individual concerned is treated as a leader.� Research evidence on charismatic
leadership reveals that charismatic people are more likely to become endorsed as
leaders because of their high energy, unconventional behavior, and heroic deeds.

While charisma is conductive to orchestrating positive large-scale transformations,


there can be a �dark side� to charismatic leadership. Jay Conger and Rabindra
Kanungo describe it this way in their seminal book: �Charismatic leaders can be
prone to extreme narcissism that leads them to promote highly self-serving and
grandiose aims.� A clinical study illustrates that when charisma overlaps with
narcissism, leaders tend to abuse their power and take advantage of their
followers. Another study indicates that narcissistic leaders tend to present a bold
vision of the future, and this makes them more charismatic in the eyes of others.

Why are such leaders more likely to rise to the top? One study suggests that
despite being perceived as arrogant, narcissistic individuals radiate �an image of
a prototypically effective leader.� Narcissistic leaders know how to draw attention
toward themselves. They enjoy the visibility. It takes time for people to see that
these early signals of competence are not later realized, and that a leader�s
narcissism reduces the exchange of information among team members and often
negatively affects group performance.

It�s not that charismatic and narcissistic people can�t ever make good leaders. In
some circumstances, they can. For example, one study found that narcissistic CEOs
�favor bold actions that attract attention, resulting in big wins or big losses.� A
narcissistic leader thus can represent a high-risk, high-reward proposition.

And it�s not that humble leaders can�t ever be charismatic. Researchers agree that
we could classify charismatic leaders as �negative� or �positive� by their
orientation toward pursuing their self-interested goals versus those of their
groups. These two sides of charismatic leadership have also been called
personalized and socialized charisma. Although the socialized charismatic leader
has the aura of a hero, it is counteracted with low authoritarianism and a genuine
interest in the collective welfare. In contrast, the personalized charismatic
leader�s perceived heroism is coupled with high authoritarianism and high
narcissism. It is when followers are confused and disoriented that they are more
likely to form personalized relationships with a charismatic leader. Socialized
relationships, on the other hand, are established by followers with a clear set of
values who view the charismatic leader as a means to achieve collective action.

The problem is that we select negative charismatic leaders much more frequently
than in the limited situations where the risk they represent might pay off. Despite
their grandiose view of themselves, low empathy, dominant orientation toward
others, and strong sense of entitlement, their charisma proves irresistible.
Followers of superheroes are enthralled by their showmanship: through their sheer
magnetism, narcissistic leaders transform their environments into a competitive
game in which their followers also become more self-centered, giving rise to
organizational narcissism, as one study shows.

If humble leaders are more effective than narcissistic leaders, why do we so often
choose narcissistic individuals to lead us?
The �romance of leadership� hypothesis suggests that we generally have a biased
tendency to understand social events in terms of leadership and people tend to
romanticize the figure of the leader.

My own research shows that our psychological states can also bias our perceptions
of charismatic leaders. High levels of anxiety make us hungry for charisma. As a
result, crises increase not only the search for charismatic leaders, but also our
tendency to perceive charisma in the leaders we already follow.

Economic and social crises thus become a unique testing ground for charismatic
leaders. They create conditions of distress and uncertainty that appear to be ideal
for the ascent of charismatic figures. Yet at the same time, they also make us more
vulnerable to choosing the wrong leader. Crises and other emotionally laden events
increase our propensity to romanticize the grandiose view of narcissistic leaders.
The paradox is that we may then choose to support the very leaders who are less
likely to bring us success. In a time of crisis, it�s easy to be seduced by
superheroes who could come and �rescue� us, but who possibly then plunge us into
greater peril.

While this may sound hopeless, there is another way of looking at it. Essentially,
we have the leaders we deserve. As we collectively select and construct our leaders
to satisfy our own needs and desires, we can choose humility or socialized charisma
over narcissism.

Margarita Mayo (margaritamayo.com) is Professor of Leadership and Organizational


Behavior at IE Business School in Madrid. She was recently featured on the
Thinkers50 Radar as one of 30 thought leaders to watch in 2017. Her new book, Yours
Truly: How to Stay True to Your Authentic Self in Leadership and Life will be
published by Bloomsbury in 2018.

How to Manage a Narcissist


Manfred F. R. Kets de Vries

George, a senior executive of a large internet provider, was a participant in one


of my leadership development programs. Although a very talented individual, he was
seen as a nuisance within the group. He tended to monopolize the conversation,
whatever the topic. All agreed that he was not a good listener. Whenever someone
else spoke, he would quickly become impatient and try to change the topic to
something closer to his interests. And he had a habit of devaluing others� work
while overemphasizing his own successes. It was quite clear to the other
participants that George viewed most people as far below his standards. It wasn�t
surprising that most of group did not like George and found it very difficult to
deal with him.
Often, it seems that having a narcissistic disposition � grandiose, self-promoting,
larger than life � is a prerequisite for reaching the higher organizational
echelons. Narcissistic people can be charismatic and manipulative, which helps them
get ahead. But although their drive and ambitions can be effective in moving
organizations forward, excessive narcissistic behavior can create havoc and lead to
organizational breakdown. Envious as they are, narcissistic people always strive to
win, whatever the costs. They see themselves as �special,� and only associate with
other �special� or high-status people.

Furthermore, narcissistic individuals have a strong sense of entitlement. When they


don�t receive the special treatment that they believe they deserve, they become
very impatient or get quite angry. Given their self-serving mindset, it�s difficult
for them to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others. Empathy
doesn�t come naturally. As narcissists are quite thin-skinned, they have difficulty
handling criticism; they very quickly feel hurt, overreact, and get defensive.
Although they may give off an impression of having high self-esteem, the opposite
is often the case. Underneath the confident exterior, they are troubled by a deep
sense of insecurity. Their bravado is a heroic effort to compensate for their
profound vulnerability. They treat positive attention as a kind of painkiller.

This all creates challenges for those who would manage narcissistic individuals.
Making matters worse, narcissists refuse to acknowledge that they have a problem.
Why would they ask for help, when they think that they are better than anybody
else? How can they learn from mistakes if they can�t admit that they�ve ever made
one?

Psychiatrists have tried many forms of intervention with narcissistic individuals.


All of them take time. Personality traits don�t change quickly, if at all. So what
can managers do? From my experience running leadership workshops, I have learned
some techniques that offer promising results. Here�s my advice.

Create a strong sense of team cohesion. A group setting makes dysfunctional acting
out more noticeable, more controllable, more discussable, and therefore less
acceptable. Peer pressure will push the narcissist to adapt to the group�s norms.
Thus, it is the peers that will take on the role of �enforcers,� to encourage the
narcissist to listen and empathize with others.

Use this strong team to promote peer feedback. For narcissists, it�s often less
threatening to receive feedback from peers, rather than from a single person or
leader. Of course, feedback from many people is harder to ignore than feedback from
one person. If the dynamics of the group are facilitated effectively, the
narcissist�s view of themselves will be revealed, mirrored, challenged, and can be
modified.

Create a safe, somewhat playful space. This can become an environment where people
with a narcissistic disposition learn to develop trust, explore boundaries, accept
feedback, and increase self-awareness. In such a setting, the narcissist�s peers
will be able to constructively confront problematic behavior while simultaneously
offering a modicum of understanding.

Don�t confront the narcissist directly. Instead, support the team. Returning to
George, the group facilitator was very careful not to confront him too forcefully
when he acted inappropriately in the group leadership development sessions. When
needed, the facilitator would empathize with George (showing surprise and hurt) as
a result of the confrontations with and feedback given by his peers. At the same
time, the facilitator empowered George�s peers not to accept his way of dominating
the conversations, to interrupt him when he went on for too long, and thus to make
him realize that he didn�t always need to be the smartest person in the room.
As time went by, George learned to empathize with others. As he practiced
listening, he learned from their experiences. He discovered that constructive
criticism from the others could be helpful, rather than devastating to his self-
esteem. George eventually came to realize the inappropriateness of many of his
expectations, and that the world didn�t revolve around him alone. He began to
internalize some of the behavior patterns of the others, which, he discovered, were
more effective ways of dealing with the challenges of life.

Of course, dealing with narcissists will always be a challenge, be it in a group


setting or otherwise. Some of these people will not be able to tolerate the
pressures from the group. They will not be able to deal with critical feedback from
peers, and may decide to quit.

But a manager�s biggest worry should not be losing their narcissist; it should be
that other team members will be the ones to resign, tired of the way narcissists
need to be catered to. It�s hard to deal with a narcissist�s sense of entitlement,
lack of empathy, and need to feel special. But if you can create a group dynamic
that keeps those tendencies in check and that helps develop the self-awareness of
everyone on your team, you�ll keep your best people � and get the best out of the
rest.

Manfred F. R. Kets de Vries is an executive coach, psychoanalyst, and management


scholar. He is the Distinguished Clinical Professor of Leadership Development and
Organizational Change at INSEAD in France, Singapore, and Abu Dhabi. His most
recent book is Riding the Leadership Rollercoaster: An Observer�s Guide.

Napoleon exhibited many syptoms of ASPD (Anti Social Personality Disorder): lacking
remorse or regret, frequent lying, manipulating others
Narcissistic Personality Disorder: inflated opinion of themselves, don't take well
to criticism, exaggerate their talents and accomplishmnets, prone to risky
behaviour, need for attention and admiation from others

The definition of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, which is no longer used as a


diagnosis because too many people have it, is, �a mental disorder in which people
have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and a
lack of empathy for others. But behind this make of ultra confidence lies a fragile
self-esteem that�s vulnerable to the slightest criticism.�

By definition, a politician is a narcissist. Here you have an individual who


believes that he/she has the power to change the world. In their mind, this person
truly believes that they can make a difference, introduce life-changing bills, make
medical care and college free, food stamps for everyone, clean air, legal drugs;
You name it, they can do it. Because they have that much power.

It was hard to limit this list, as there are so many narcissistic politicians, so
these guys must be pretty special.

If they do say so themselves�

Ever heard of the phrase "Napoleon complex"? You can thank the 19th century Emperor
of France Napoleon Bonaparte for that. Napoleon's behavior puts many other
politicians throughout history to shame. A man of short stature, he made up for it
with his ego. Napoleon was considered a tyrant with extreme grandiose beliefs and
overly aggressive behavior, allegedly to make up for feelings of inferiority. He
was so feared in his time that a nursery rhyme, The Bogeyman, was written to scare
children into stopping bad behavior. Fortunately for the world, Napoleon's eventual
downfall came at the hands of a united Europe who worked together to bring down one
man whom they believed held more power than he should be allowed.

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