Professional Documents
Culture Documents
DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Ag Program HR
Objectives
At the end of this session you should:
Overview
• Difficult people and conflict
• 12 types of difficult people
• Additional Helpful Hints
1
Difficult People and Conflict
The Bulldozer
• Know it all
• Often use threats,
sarcasm, intimidation
2
Dealing with Dozers
• Prepare yourself
• Ask questions
• Focus on solution
• Do not confront them
Bullies
Battling Bullies
3
Fire Hose
• Dampen Enthusiasm
• Everything will fail
• Negative statements
• Constantly complaining
Stallers/Wafflers
• Reluctant to turn down requests
• Want to be liked
• Afraid or unable to manage
• Paralyzed by tough decisions
4
Sideline the Stallers
• Surface hidden concerns
• Help them resolve the problem
• You make the decision – with caution
• Support decisions
• Keep control of situation
Silent Types
• Silent/unresponsive
• Answer with a grunt
• Turn away from people
• Pretend nothing happened
5
Indecisives
• Super helpful – but . . .
• Postpone decisions
• Hint and beat around the bush
Resolve Indecision
• Address fears with “what if” questions
• Help resolve problems when issues
surface
• Help examine facts
• Watch for anger or withdrawal
Sniper
6
Unload the Sniper
• Surface the attack
• Provide peaceful alternative
• Bring resistance into the open
• Seek group confirmation or denial of
snipers criticism
• Use coaching/counseling if assigned
tasks not done
Why Always Me
Nothing is Always
• Dig for specifics
• Identify true concern
• Point out where not true
7
Control Freak
• Get into everyone’s business
• Undermine and insult abilities
• Lack confidence & trust
• Insufferable – render subordinates
ineffective
Reduce Contollers
• Build trust
• Take small steps toward more authority
• Keep focused on solution
• Speak from your own view-point
• Don’t let yourself be verbally abused
Super-Agreeables
• Very personable
• Don’t act the way they say they will
• Supportive but don’t deliver
8
Dealing with Super-Agreeables
• Show them you like them
• Prevent unrealistic commitments
• Make honesty non-threatening
• Point out inconsistencies in behavior
• Work for a mutual benefit
• Listen carefully to jokes
Its Not Up To Me
• Always point to higher authority
• Invokes other powers
9
Magician
• Problem Disappeared!
• Still bring it up to others
Helpful Hints
• Don’t escalate
• Focus on what a person is trying to say
• Avoid being purposefully hurtful
• Model behavior you want
• Focus on solutions
• Maintain eye contact
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More Helpful Hints
• Blame the process, not the person
• Be specific
• Avoid always and never
• Avoid name calling
• Encourage listening
• Confront in private – praise in public
• Use your communication skills!
Summary
Resources
• 14 Workplace Personalities and How to Handle Them – iVillage,
http://www.ivillage.com/work/job/succeed/articles/0,,187833_245505,
00.html
• Online Newsletter, Dealing with Difficult People, March 1999,
http://www.itstime.com/print/mar99p.htm
• Techniques for Dealing with Difficult People, Ag Decision Maker, John
Baker, Iowa State University, Iowa Extension, October 1999
• Dealing with Difficult People,
http://www.bethanyhome.org/dealing_with_difficult_people.htm
• Dealing with Difficult People/Situations: Role of the Extension
Committee Member, University of Minnesota Extension Service
• Dealing with Difficult Members, University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire,
http://www.uwec.edu/DC/AP/complexthoughts/Dealing_w_Difficult_Mb
rs.html
• Games People Play, Presentation to BVHRMA, May 1, 2003, Jan
Pfannstiel, SPHR
• Welch, Ben D., Phd, Interpersonal Relations Skills, Presentation at
TAMU and Dealing with Difficult People, presentation June 19, 1998
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