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Haley Zeiler

Professor Williams

English A 8 AM

18 October 2018

Divorce in the United States

We all desire to find our one, true soulmate, the one who we will tie the knot with and the

one that will be our forever love. However, divorce has been present in the United States for

centuries and has never remained constant. The fluctuation in divorce rates is due to several

factors that are both within and out of our control. The final decision to abruptly end what was

intended to have lasted forever has everything to do with those factors that are surrounding each

member in the marriage and have been factored in when calculating the ratio of divorce. The

complicated, give and take nature of marriage and difficulties that people have with finding unity

with each other contribute to the variations of divorce rates over the years.

Lowenstein stated it best when he said, “it should be remembered that divorce does not

occur for a single reason and that frequently there are a number of factors involved as to why

divorce and separations occur” (Lowenstein 154). Many factors come into play when finalizing a

divorce. “Falling out of love” could be just one of the many reasons that this challenging

decision has been brought to a married couple’s attention. Lowenstein bluntly states that,

“divorce is due to twelve prevailing factors: women’s independence, too early marriage and

arranged marriages, economic factors, poor intellectual and educational skills, liberal divorce

laws, sexual factors leading to incompatibility, role conflicts, alcoholism and substance abuse,

difference between the partners, religious factors, attitudes towards divorce, and various other

factors” (Lowenstein 155). In addition to Lowenstein’s statement, divorce financial analyst

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Shawn Leamon contributes to his clause by stating, “Divorce rates are at such a high rate

because independence is highly valued in our society, but marriage is not an independent

undertaking and requires sharing and yielding to your partners wishes in order for it to be

successful” (Leamon). Breakdowns in the communication between each partner played a role in

several divorces and can be controlled with assistances. If you fail to communicate with your

spouse, then you are lacking the most important thing that a relationship feeds off of. Sexual

dissatisfaction is an additional characteristic that is understood to be a factor in the desire for a

divorce that can also be controlled. If one or both partners in a relationship are unhappy sexually,

then they will wonder amongst others to fulfill that craving, which can be defined as infidelity.

Once the secret of infidelity catches up to your marriage, then all of the trust you had for each

other vanishes, along with the marriage. Finances have been an extremely repetitive motive for

divorce. If one feels constrained because they are having to pay for too much or that they are

carrying the others dead weight, then they will most likely want that weight lifted off of them.

Quick changes in life style along with abuse is another commonly seen reason for divorce is

society and are uncontrollable in most cases. People undergo stress and anxiety when quick

changes such as a disaster or death occurs. This can affect their ability to love properly which

causes the other partner to feel unwelcomed. As the feelings fester within them they fight and

eventually agree to end things before they get any worse. Abuse is something everyone wants to

steer clear from, so it would only make sense that a person would have a desire to leave their

abusive situation and enter a healthy one. Another uncontrollable factor that causes divorce is

one’s upbringing. According to Leamon, “it is often said that how you are brought up can

predispose you to certain conditions in your own life. People that have a history of divorce in

their own family have an increased likelihood of getting divorced” (Leamon). You have no
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choice in who your parents are or how you are raised, but those two things definitely alter who

you are and how you respond to thing within your own marriage. Cherlin additional argued that,

“the turbulence in family life caused by frequent entrance into and dissolution of formal

marriages and informal cohabiting unions is the defining characteristic of American family life”

(Kennedy and Ruggles 595).

People who are married before the age of twenty-five are more likely to file for divorce

than those that prolong marriage. The older you are, the more mature and suitable you are for a

life-long commitment. If the current marriage is not the first marriage, then it has a higher chance

of ending. Once someone has gone through the process of divorce once, they no longer fear it

because it is not unknown territory. They have lived through it once and know they could do it

again if they needed to. If the religion between the two individuals does not coincide, then they

are more likely to separate. Religion is something individuals hold to the highest of highs and

trying to change that for someone else rarely happens or happens with extreme tension.

Uneducated people, or those who lack intelligence, are the ones who will most likely be seen

filing for divorce. Money is important. You cannot obtain large quantities of money without

holding a powerful job. You cannot hold a powerful job with education and intelligence. Lastly,

those who are addicts or contain a mental illness are at risk of getting a divorce in comparison to

others because addiction is hard to love. You are, in a sense, loving the drug rather than the

person and most individuals are not strong enough to stay with someone who is mentally ill.

Divorce rates have been recorded over centuries and have gone up some years and down

others. This is because, “before the twentieth century, courts would not allow a divorce decree

unless it could be proven that one spouse was at fault for abandonment, cruelty, mental illness, or

adultery” (Leamon). Due to this restriction, acquiring a divorce at this particular time was harder
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and therefore the rates of divorce were low. As time progress, the rates began to inflate because,

“during the 1960s when feminism was just gaining ground, the Uniform Marriage and Divorce

Act was passed, which allowed for a no-fault divorce” (Leamon). Now people had the freedom

to file for divorce without restrictions holding them back, and people wanted to test this freedom

which caused an increase in divorce. It only stayed fluctuating from there on out because there

were years that were more challenging than others and there were some years that provided more

money than other years, so the rates continuously changed. In present times; however, it is highly

present because of our drive for independence and our inability to give rather than receive. As

times continue, it will most likely mimic the previous patterns and lower before it shoots up

again.

We all fear change, but change is inevitable no matter where you are or who you are

with. Sometimes we want that change to happen, other times we do not. However, we are

required to accept it and move forward. Divorce occurs because of several elements that are both

controllable and uncontrollable and those elements happen to all kinds of people. Each divorce

case is not like the other, and each year is not like the next. Divorce can stay constant in one

year, increase the next, and vanish in the next two. These fluctuations happen as a result of the

factors and the people and have been calculated for centuries. It is obvious that although they

have been up and down, it has increased more than anything else but will continue to change as

these factors continue to take part in one’s marriage.

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Works Cited

“Divorce Statistics: Over 115 Studies, Facts and Rates for 2018.” The Smart Choice for Divorce

and Family Law Issues, Wilkinson and Finkbeiner Family Law Attorneys, 2017,

www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts/

Kennedy, Sheela, and Steven Ruggles. “Breaking Up Is Hard to Count: The Rise of Divorce in

the United States, 1980-2010.” vol. 51, no. 2, 8 Jan. 2014, pp. 588-596. JSTOR Journals,

doi:10.1007/s13524-013-0270-9

Leamon, Shawn. “Why is the Divorce Rate so High in the US? (Recommended).” Divorce and

Your Money, 28 Jun. 2017, divorceandyourmoney.com/blogs/why-is-the-divorce-rate-so-

high/

Lowenstein, Ludwig F. “Causes and Associated Features of Divorce as Seen by Recent

Research.” Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, vol. 42, no. 3/4, 1 Feb. 2005, pp. 153-167.

SocINDEX with Full Text, doi: 10.1300/J087v42n03_09

Stearns-Montgomery, Mary. “The Top 10 Reasons Marriages End in Divorce.” Stearns-

Montgomery & Proctor, 26 Jun. 2013, stearns-law.com/blog/divorce/the-top-10-reasons-

marriages-end-in-divorce.