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 UPCOMING AT KAPLEN
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2 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
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The story behind
Frank Sinatra’s
$10,000 yarmulke
● Last month, when Sotheby’s held
a huge auction of items belonging
to Frank Sinatra and his widow,
Barbara, the item that made the most
headlines was one of the smallest: a
hand-knit yarmulke.
Frank had owned it, and someone
— we don’t know who — bought it for
nearly $10,000.
But why did Sinatra have a kippah?
Where did he get it? And when?
The story starts on a memorable
night nearly 40 years ago, when many
members of the Rat Pack were among
the unlikely guests of honor at a fund-
raising dinner for a Jewish day school
on the Jersey Shore.
The kippah was presented to Sinatra
on an evening in May or June of 1981, at
the old Teplitzky’s Hotel in Atlantic City.
The occasion was the annual awards
dinner held by the Hebrew Academy of
Atlantic County, then in Margate. And
the man presenting the kippah to a
tuxedo-clad Ol’ Blue Eyes was Samuel
“Sonny” Schwartz, a longtime journal-
ist, columnist, radio host, and man-
about-town in the Atlantic City area.
The late Mr. Schwartz’s daughter,
Pauline, showed us the photo; she
said that a framed copy hangs in her
mother’s home to this day.
Each year at its gala, the Hebrew
Academy would honor a Man of the
Year. The academy “would choose one
person in the community who had
made an impact on the community,
and through this person’s connections
we would be able to raise funds for the
school,” remembers Rabbi Mordechai
Weiss, the academy’s longtime princi-
pal. Sonny Schwartz was the honoree
in 1980, which his daughter said was “a
super-big deal for our family.” She re-
members saying the Hamotzi blessing
Sonny Schwartz, one of the organizers of a 1981 fundraiser for the Hebrew
Academy of Atlantic County, N.J., presents Frank Sinatra with a personalized
yarmulke at the event, held in a kosher hotel in Atlantic City.
Page 3
at that dinner along with the eve-
ning’s emcee, the Jewish comedian
and Rat Pack fixture Joey Bishop.
Mr. Schwartz was a main dinner
organizer the next year, and the hon-
oree was his close friend Paul “Skin-
ny” D’Amato, the famed owner of
the resort town’s 500 Club. D’Amato, childhood in Hoboken. He frequently vis-
among other accomplishments, is ited Israel and he raised money for several
known for hosting Jerry Lewis and buildings there that still bear his name.
Dean Martin’s first performance, in When Frank appeared at the Hebrew
1946. He also booked Sinatra at lean Academy dinner, he was presented with
times in the singer’s career. a kippah that was emblazoned with his
D’Amato was one of only a few non- name and musical notes. The kippah in
Jews to receive the honor. Another the photo is, by all indications, the one
non-Jew who was honored in another that was sold in the Sotheby’s auction.
year, according to Rabbi Weiss, was “When I saw the picture, the one that
Ivana Trump, the then-wife of the fu- was auctioned, I immediately knew that
ture president. (During his Atlantic City it was from that time, because my fa-
days, Donald J. Trump would appear ther got one at the same time,” Pauline
on Sonny Schwartz’s radio show.) Schwartz said.
D’Amato brought several of his Mr. Schwartz’s widow, Connie, also
showbiz friends to the dinner in 1981. presented me with a picture of a kip-
“I remember the dinner very well,” pah, which — because he was a jour-
Rabbi Weiss said. “At the dinner honor- nalist — features typewriters instead of
ing Skinny, Jerry Lewis, Frank Sinatra, musical notes. Both kippot spell out the
and Sammy Davis Jr. appeared and names using only lower-case letters.
Danny Thomas sent in a video which Rabbi Weiss said he also received a
was played for all the patrons at the similar kippah.
dinner. The entire ballroom was con- Who actually made the kippah? That’s
verted to a nightclub with a huge stage a matter of some debate. Rabbi Weiss
stretching almost the complete length believes that presenting it was the idea
of the ballroom. The children of the He- of the late Rubin Wishkin, a past presi-
brew Academy choir also performed dent of the day school, and that pos-
that evening. sibly it was crocheted by Mr. Wishkin’s
“I still remember the first joke that wife, Miriam.
Jerry Lewis said at the dinner,” Rabbi Pauline Schwartz thinks it was made
Weiss added. “He looked at Skinny by one of Rabbi Weiss’ daughters, or
straight into his eyes and said ‘Skinny! possibly his wife.
Teplitzky’s!’” A group of South Jersey Jews have
It’s long been known that the Italian- been discussing their memories of that
American, Roman Catholic Sinatra was
a lifelong admirer of the Jews and a
supporter of Jewish causes. His rela-
tionship with Jews went back to his CONTENTS
NOSHES .......................................................4
BRIEFLY LOCAL ....................................... 11
COVER STORY ..........................................12
OPINION .................................................... 18
KEEPING KOSHER..................................22
D’VAR TORAH .........................................23
THE FRAZZLED HOUSEWIFE ........... 24
CROSSWORD PUZZLE ........................ 24
ARTS & CULTURE ...................................25
CALENDAR ...............................................26
COURTESY OF PAULINE SCHWARTZ
OBITUARIES .............................................29
CLASSIFIEDS .......................................... 30
JEWISH WORLD .....................................32
REAL ESTATE...........................................33
Candlelighting: Friday, January 4, 4:23 p.m.
Shabbat ends: Saturday, January 5, 5:27 p.m.
For convenient home delivery, call 201-837-8818
or bit.ly/jsubscribe
night on a Facebook thread ever since
the news about the auction. Their opin-
ions on the kippah’s origins differ. Several
credited one of the rabbi’s daughters,
but she said that she doesn’t remember
doing so and probably would have been
too young to have known how to crochet
in 1981.
Skinny D’Amato died in 1984. Frank
Sinatra and Sonny Schwartz died within
a few months of each other in 1998.
Teplitzky’s closed in 1987, but the name
was revived briefly a few years ago for
a coffee shop in the also-since-shut-
tered Chelsea Hotel, which was built on
Teplitzky’s site. The Hebrew Academy
still is operating, although now it’s called
Trocki Hebrew Academy School of Atlan-
tic County and has moved to Egg Harbor
Township.
The kippah’s reappearance is exciting
for the people who remembered it from
the first time around.
“I thought, really — they kept it for
all these years?” Pauline Schwartz said.
“That’s really something. When you find
out the story, it’s one object that tells so
much if you find out the story behind it.
“It’s a snapshot of a time period and
a place and it sort of symbolizes almost
a magical type of thing that took place,
when all these celebrities came there,
and it was all to honor this Jewish day
school in Margate.” STEPHEN SILVER/JTA
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JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 3
Noshes
FINDING ROOTS:
Andy Samberg’s
Jewish connection
It’s a big week for
ANDY SAM-
BERG. On
January 6, he’ll
co-host the Golden
Globe awards (see my
special “Globes” article,
this issue). On January 8,
the new season of
“Finding Your Roots,”
the PBS celebrity
ancestry series, begins,
and Samberg, 40, is one
of the two celebrities
whose ancestry is
explored. (The other is
George R. R. Martin, the
author of the “Game of
Thrones” books.) Back in
August, a “Roots” press
release dropped a big
hint about this episode’s
content: “Highlights
include a search for
Andy Samberg’s biologi-
cal grandparents…”. I
gather, from this release,
that either Andy’s
mother or his father —
both of them Jewish
— was adopted. My
educated guess, based
on a lot of clues, is that it
was his mother who was
adopted, and I won’t be
that surprised if she’s
Jewish by birth. (Airs
first on Tuesday, January
8, at 8 p.m. on PBS.)
Episode 4, airing
first on January 29, will
feature SHERYL SAND-
BERG, 49, Facebook’s
chief operating officer.
Episode 5, first airing on
February 5, will feature
former House speaker
Paul Ryan. It’s already
been made public that
Ryan was surprised when
he learned, on air, that
Want to read more noshes? Visit facebook.com/jewishstandard
4 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
“#BillsFanMail James, Thank you for your
note. I am Jewish and I don’t have plans
in converting but I do appreciate your note.”
— William Shatner, tweeted to a fan whose long letter —
Shatner included it in his tweet — went from an appreciation of
a talk the actor had given to a heartfelt plea for his conversion.
he had about 3 percent section devoted to the
Ashkenazi Jewish an- film “Jakob the Liar,” in
cestry. Episode 7, airing which Williams played
first on February 19, fea- the title character, a Jew,
tures comedian SARAH Itzkoff summed up Wil-
SILVERMAN, 48. (I may liams’ connection to the
mention these again in Jewish community. He
future columns.) writes: “On face value,
there might seem to be
Beautiful heads-up little common ground
If Amazon helps shared by an impover-
fund a film, it ished Holocaust victim
often appears on and the Episcopalian
the Amazon Andy Samberg Sheryl Sandberg Sarah Silverman son of a wealthy Mid-
Prime Video streaming western auto executive.”
service not that long (That was Williams.)
after it opened in “But in his mind, Robin
theaters. This is the case could justify it: he had
with the film “Beautiful grown up around Jews,
Boy,” which will begin worked with them, and
streaming on Amazon on embraced them as some
January 4. As noted in of his closest friends; he
my Globes story (see liked to boast that he
page 25), a “Beautiful knew so much Yiddish,
Boy” co-star, TIMOTHÉE ‘people tend to think I’m
CHALAMET, 24, is Jewish.’ He was fascinat-
nominated for a best ed with the otherness of
supporting actor Globe. Jews, admired them for
Free for Prime members. Timothée Chalamet Dave Itzkoff Steve Haft their tenacity, and was
furious with how they’d
In memoriam (1969), “All the Presi- er who converted to and “Hill Street Blues”); been treated by history.”
Unlike most dent’s Men” (1976), Judaism in 1982. When ANTHONY BOURDAIN, Itzkoff sums up with a
years, I have “Misery” (1990), “Mara- he was 7 he learned that 61, chef/writer/TV host; statement about Wil-
space for a thon Man” (1976), and his maternal grandfather RICKY JAY, 72, master liams and his role in
column item on “The Princess Bride” was a German Jewish magician, author, and “Jakob the Liar” from
well-known Jews in the (1987). The last two were immigrant who married actor; HARLAN ELLI- STEVE HAFT, the pro-
arts who died in the last adapted from novels he a freed slave. Learning SON, 84, science fiction ducer of “Jakob” and
year. You’ll see that I wrote. Also, rap singer this led Lester to a writer (“A Boy and His “Dead Poet’s Society.”
give more room to the MAC MILLER, 26; actress gradual process (de- Dog”); and CLAUDE Haft told Itzkoff: “‘He
less famous. Those who CHARLOTTE RAE scribed in his 1988 book LANZMANN, 92, a realized that Jews had
left us, as the phrase (“Facts of Life”, “Car 54, “Lovesong”) that ended filmmaker best known come out of this crime
goes, include: author and Where Are You?”); up with him becoming a for the Holocaust against humanity and
Newark native PHILIP journalist CHARLES devout Jew; comedian documentary “Shoah.” crime against human-
ROTH, 85; playwright KRAUTHAMMER, 68; MARTY ALLEN, 95; More than honor- ity is precisely the sort
NEIL SIMON, 91; Marvel AHARON APPELFELD, Jefferson Airplane/ able mention: 2019 will of thing that could
comic creator STAN 85, a Rumanian-born Starship songwriter/ be the fifth year since reach deeply in Robin’s
LEE, 95; top screenwrit- Israeli novelist and guitar player MARTY Robin Williams died at heart. You add it all up
er WILLIAM GOLDMAN, Holocaust survivor; and BALIN, 76 (the secular 63. I recently chanced and there is kind of,
87. Goldman’s films JULIUS LESTER, 78, a son of a Jewish father); upon the 2018 Williams barely explicable, Jew-
include “Butch Cassidy university professor and STEVEN BOCHCO, 74 biography, “Robin,” by ish consciousness in this
and the Sundance Kid” prolific journalist/review- (creator of “L.A. Law” DAVE ITZKOFF, 42. In a goy guy.’” –N.B.
California-based Nate Bloom can be reached at
Middleoftheroad1@aol.com
E L E V A T E Y O U R S T A N D A R D S
T W O L O C A T IO N S T O S ER V E Y O U B ET T E R - E N G L E W O O D , N J & H A RR IM A N , N Y - B E N Z E L B U S C H . C O M
 BIGGER FREE
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Bugaboo Fox Stellar

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Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 5
Local
So happy! So exhausted!
Local teens join others from around the world at NCSY convention in Long Branch
Abigail Klein Leichman

S
tephanie, Linit, and Dennis have
plenty of Jewish classmates at Fair
Lawn High School. But when they
joined more than 400 other pub-
lic-high-school students at last week’s Yar-
chei Kallah Torah study convention run by
NCSY, the Orthodox Union’s youth move-
ment, they made new Jewish friends from
across North and South America.
“I loved meeting people from all over,”
Dennis said. “It opened a whole new world.”
His horizon-broadening experience
began last summer when he was a
camper in an NCSY summer program
called the Jerusalem Journey. TJJ, as it is
called, is geared to members of NCSY’s
network of more than 200 Jewish Stu-
dent Union culture clubs on public-
school campuses.
“When I went to TJJ I met people from
different parts of the world, and here at
my first Yarchei Kallah I met people from
Chile and Argentina,” Dennis said. “When
you go to public school, you don’t realize
how many other Jewish kids there are. We
are all from public school and we don’t
know Torah as well, so we’re all trying to
learn and become friends.
“I will hang out with some of these peo-
ple next week, and then we’ll hang out on Everyone at this year’s Yarchei Kallah convention in Long Branch gathered for a group picture.  COURTESY NCSY

social media.”
The annual five-day retreat, held this year
at Ocean Place Resort in Long Branch, offers
a December vacation alternative for teens. It
includes group study, one-on-one learning,
and late-night discussions with teachers,
advisors, and peers, as well as lots of com-
munal singing and festivity over Shabbat.
The program also included inspirational
talks from Hillel Fuld, an American-born
Israeli high-tech guru whose brother,
Ari, was murdered in a terrorist attack in
September; and from British singer-song-
writer Alex Clare, who told his story about
his return to Judaism.
NCSY requested that the Jewish Stan-
dard use only the first names of the local
ETAN VANN/NCSY
participants interviewed for this article in
order to respect their privacy.
Stephanie and Linit, both Fair Lawn
High School seniors, became involved in
NCSY in 10th grade and attended their first
Yarchei Kallah in December 2017.
“Last year it was absolutely incredible,”
Stephanie said. “I knew if I went again this
year I could grow in my knowledge and
bring back what I learned to other peo-
ple. For me, the all-time highlights were
the singing and the ‘mishmar’ learning
groups. We had a choice of mishmar ses-
sions to attend and I chose the one about
things we are obligated to learn and bring
into our lives.”
Linit said that Yarchei Kallah “fuels my
upcoming year and helps me get into the
correct mindset for where I want to be in
my Judaism. And it helps me to motivate
others to do the same thing.”
Linit said she enjoyed rekindling friend-
ships she made last summer at TJJ, and she
was inspired by the event’s overall theme
of the personal story of the biblical leader
members may be going through,” she said.
When school is back in session, Linit
plans to start attending weekly educational
sessions offered at “Torah High,” the nick-
name of the Jewish Student Union club at
Fair Lawn High School.
Eitan, 16, a student at Teaneck High
School, was impressed by the teaching style
of Teaneck native Rabbi Moshe Benovitz,
the managing director of the Israel-based
International NCSY.
“I have mild ADD, and I’ve never seen
such a calm yet energetic learning envi-
ronment,” Eitan said. “At the beginning of
our class about Moshe and what it means
to be a leader, Rabbi Benovitz asked us to
take off our shoes and hand our phones to
someone else. He said we’d be more con-
nected to our learning if our feet were con-
nected to the ground.
“And it worked.”
Eitan has been involved in NCSY locally
for three years. “I’ve been going to Thurs-
day ‘Latte and Learning’ sessions and to
Friday night oneg Shabbat programs,” he

Moshe — Moses — and how each person
can create his or her own story. She also
got a lot out of a session on “the strategy
of sensitivity, where we learned ways to
Linit, center, Stephanie, right, and a friend stand together at the convention. deal with situations our peers or family
said. “Yarchei Kallah is a different ballgame
— five days of gaining personal relationships
with the advisors and rabbis. The energy is
incomparable.
See So happy! page 34

6 Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019


Hockey or homework?
Frisch student faces difficult choice
LOIS GOLDRICH
T
hat’s the thing about making
decisions, 17-year-old Noah
Petak said. Put two people in the
same situation and they might
choose two different things, depending on
their priorities and preferences.
“Just make your own decision,”
Noah said.
He’s a senior at the Frisch Academy in
Paramus and a talented hockey player —
and this year he opted out of club hockey
to spend more time on his studies and just
“hang out.” Not an easy decision when
you have played with the North Jersey
Avalanche hockey club for some 10 years,
helped create what has become a vibrant
hockey team at your high school, and
won a gold medal at the Maccabiah games
in Israel.
Still, Noah has no regrets.
Noah — who lives in Tenafly with his
parents Jonathan and Susie and his three
siblings — still loves the sport, but last
YESHIVA WEEK WINTER BREAK IN MIAMI
Yaako
v Motze
n Benzio
THE NE YEAR O
BE
SE
D TR
ES
BL
year he realized that his schedule
was untenable. Something had to
give if he was to have a relatively
normal life. Placing school first,
he withdrew from the club, even
though that meant effectively for-
going an opportunity to play in
Division 1 some day.
“It was too hard,” he said.
“Freshman, sophomore, and
junior years I was practicing three
or four nights a week and then
playing two games on the week-
end. I would get out of school at Noah Petak on the ice.
5:30, go to practice, and then get
home at around 10:30, when I would start
to do my schoolwork.
“It was a very big decision, but I don’t
regret it. I have more time to hang out with father has played basketball all his life,
my family and friends, I’m home for Shab-
bat, and I have more time for my school-
work. I didn’t have a life. Now everything
is more relaxed.”
Noah still hasn’t decided whether to pur- of the Frisch hockey team, the Cougars.
sue medicine or finance as a professional
n Mille
r
W services: “Do American Jews Speak a Jewish
F
EE
S
career. “I really enjoy them both,” he said.
It’s clear that sports are a big deal in his
family. Noah plays golf in the summer, his
his sister swims, and both his younger
brothers share Noah’s enthusiasm for ice
hockey. Nor has Noah abandoned the
sport. Far from it. He’s an important part
“We practice twice a week and have one
Friday, January 11 &
Saturday, January 12
Rabbi Barry
Shaeffer Memorial
Scholar in Residence
Professor Sarah
Bunin Benor
Sarah Bunin Benor, an expert on Jewish
languages and American Jews, and professor of
Contemporary Jewish Studies at Hebrew Union
College–Jewish Institute of Religion in Los Angeles.
Join us for her three talks:
Friday - 7pm: “From Harry and Sally to Josh and
Liora: Jewish Names Around the World”
Saturday D’var Torah during Shabbat morning
Language?”
Saturday - 1:30pm: “Ruach in the Dining Hall:
Language at North American Jewish Summer
Camps”
Learning, Inspired.
Local
game, or else we practice once a
week and have two games,” Noah
said. The team holds second place
in its division.
The Cougars is a relatively new
team. “It started up five years ago,
when I was still in eighth grade,”
Noah said. “When I came in as a
freshman, it really took off. We had
really good players,” he added, cit-
ing in particular his friend Jake
Froman, who lives in Englewood.
While other yeshivas have been
creating hockey teams over the
past few years, “We’re the only
yeshiva with a real team,” he said, explain-
ing that the other schools’ teams don’t
compete in games “but do practice and
scrimmage. We’re the only school that
plays against public schools in the New
Jersey high school ice hockey league.”
Noah said that as an observant Jew —
and the only Jew on the Avalanche — he
always was aware that “I was a religious
SEE HOCKEY PAGE 34
If you’d like
to join us for a
meal on either
Friday night or
Shabbat lunch,
register at
cbsteaneck.org.
Congregation
Beth Sholom
354 Maitland Avenue
Teaneck, NJ 07666
201-833-2620
www.cbsteaneck.org
JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 7
Local
‘One of the most evil symbols of hate’
In response to swastika found in Ridgewood school,
federation to focus on security, anti-bias training
Larry Yudelson
N
ext month, the Jewish Federa-
tion of Northern New Jersey
will hold an anti-bias work-
shop for teachers. (See box.)
This comes in partial response to the dis-
covery of a swastika and a star of David in
the stall of a girls’ bathroom in Ridgewood
High School on Chanukah.
And it comes as the federation is hiring
its first community security director.
“With the rise in anti-Semitic activity
here in northern New Jersey, it is impera-
tive that we focus on the safety and secu-
rity of our 125,000 Jews,” Jason Shames,
the federation’s executive director, said.
“This position will ensure Jewish commu-
nal safety by focusing on incident response
and developing individual institution- and
community-wide plans through training,
risk mitigation, relationships with law
enforcement, and access to other govern-
ment resources.”
Mr. Shames said that graffiti should not
be minimized as a low-level threat.
“At its core, the swastika is one of the
most evil symbols of hate for the Jewish
people,” he said. “We’re seeing a lot of
swastika activity by juveniles. It’s very con-
cerning. Each incident has to be handled
with the utmost urgency and discretion.”
He said that the federation is working
closely with law enforcement, both in
Ridgewood and at the county level.
“We had a meeting with the superin-
tendent at the school,” he said. “We had a
security summit for the community which
drew a hundred people.”
The new federation security official,
who Mr. Shames hopes to hire by the end
of the month, will become the liaison with
law enforcement and will work with syna-
gogues and other community institutions
on security issues.
And in the wake of the Pittsburgh shoot-
ing, Mr. Shames sees the need for the secu-
rity director to draw up a community cri-
sis plan, “a blueprint for how we would act
and go about our business.”
Rabbi David Fine leads Ridgewood’s
Temple Israel. He said the swastika in
the local high school “reflects a growing
spread of anti-Semitic imagery and van-
dalism that we’ve seen spreading through
the country, of which Pittsburgh was the
worst example.”
He praised the response of Ridgewood’s
schools superintendent, Daniel Fishbein,
who reported on the incident, which he
called “shocking and disturbing,” in a let-
ter to the community.
“It’s all been taken very seriously,” Rabbi
Fine said.
8 Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019
Jason Shames
Rabbi Fine said his congregation has
“increased our security protocols, as I
believe most of the Jewish institutions in
the area have done. We remain vigilant.
We are grateful for the good working rela-
tionship with the police, with the village,
with the schools administration.
“This type of vandalism is disturbing.
It needs to be watched. I hope we won’t
be dealing with anything worse than
that. No doubt the overwhelming sense
of the public is outrage and horror at
these spreading expressions of hate and
intolerance.
“Presumably it was a high school kid.
You see inappropriate things scribbled
in high school bathrooms a lot. But it’s
not always hateful against groups that
are represented by members of the stu-
dent body. That’s what makes it more
disturbing. It’s not the first time we saw
anti-Semitic expressions written on the
walls of school property. I don’t neces-
sarily expect it will be the last. On the
one hand, we don’t want to overreact,
to reward and celebritize the student
who did it. At the same time, we have
to make it clear that it crosses a line that
can’t be tolerated.
“It’s one thing when you read about
anti-Semitic outbreaks in other places.
When it’s in your own hometown, the
lesson is there’s no place we can imagine
ourselves in a bubble where we are safe
from this hatred.”
Abigail Miller is director of educa-
tion at Rockland County’s Holocaust
Museum and Center in Suffern, N.Y.,
for Tolerance and Education. She will
be leading the February anti-bias work-
shop at the federation.
“It’s one of our most popular and
Rabbi David Fine
important trainings,” she said. “We want
to encourage teachers and educators
to take seriously the issue of diversify-
ing classroom materials, voices, and the
ideas they’re bringing to students, as well
as unpacking their own unconscious bias
and racism. How do our own beliefs and
With the rise
in anti-Semitic
activity here in
northern New
Jersey, it is
imperative that
we focus on
the safety and
security of our
125,000 Jews.
Jason Shames
attitudes, whether conscious or uncon-
scious, affect our students?
“This presentation came about in a
reactionary sort of way, responding to
unfortunate incidents of bias and dis-
crimination that had already happened,”
she continued. “As a Holocaust center,
we received a lot of calls from schools
over the past couple years that had anti-
Semitic incidents.”
The center, at Rockland Community
College, is a resource for, Bergen, Rock-
land, and Orange counties.
Ms. Miller said the history of the Holo-
caust is a key component of the training.
Abigail Miller
“We speak about how it’s possible for
political waves or movements to capital-
ize on people’s unconscious bias,” she
said. “There’s always a possibility that
if we don’t check our biases, if we aren’t
working to create a sense of social justice
and a moral compass to stand up against
bias and racism, if we don’t have that
sense of urgency with us, it’s easy to get
swept along in the current, as happened
in Germany in the 1930s. We talk about
the power and influence of teachers, and
the role of teachers in Germany in mak-
ing sure children were indoctrinated in
Nazi ideology.”
She said swastikas in a school should
be taken seriously.
“Any kind of hate-based speech on
campus creates a hostile environment
for all students. It’s easy to wave this off
as childish behavior. Often students don’t
think seriously about these things. We
have to contextualize and educate both
students and teachers about the history
of the symbols and what they mean.
“If we treat it as no big deal, what kind
of message does that send to our young
people? We want to amp up the educa-
tion on what these symbols mean. We
want to bring an empathetic component
of this to students and educators, to help
them understand why it is so important
to respond to these kinds of events.”
What: Open Heart and Mind:
Softening Bias and Racism
in Ourselves and Our Teaching
When: February 6, 4:30 — 6:00 p.m.
Where: Jewish Federation of
Northern New Jersey
50 Eisenhower Drive, Paramus
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Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 9

Local
Sinai and synapses
Rabbi to talk about the relationship between science and religion in Ridgewood
LARRY YUDELSON
S
cience and religion often are
thought of as enemies.
Rabbi G eoffrey Mitel-
man disagrees.
Rabbi Mitelman is the founder of
Sinai and Synapses, which boasts
of being “Scientifically Grounded.
Spiritually Uplifting” and attempts to
bridge the chasm between religion,
particularly but not exclusively Juda-
ism, and science.
Rabbi Mitelman will speak at Tem-
ple Israel in Ridgewood on January 12.
(See box.)
As a child, he said, Rabbi Mitelman,
40, was enthralled by both science
and religion. He grew up in Westches-
ter County; his parents were leaders
of their synagogue, Woodlands Com-
munity Temple in White Plains. “I
spent a lot of time in the synagogue
library” while his parents were at
meetings there, he said. He matricu-
lated in Princeton as a math major, but
soon he switched to religion and Jew-
ish studies.
After ordination from the Reform
movement’s Hebrew Union College
in 2007, Rabbi Mitelman got a job as
an assistant rabbi at Temple Beth El in
Chappaqua, where he found himself
bringing science into his sermons.
“When I was teaching or preaching,
I would bring in something I read in
Scientific American or the New York
Times science section,” he said. “A
lot of psychology and neuroscience.
The congregants were very excited by
those conversations. The challenge is not
getting Jews excited about science. It’s get-
ting them excited about Judaism.
“A lot of my congregants were engaging
more in the science than in their Judaism.
They had ambivalent feelings about Juda-
ism and religion. They viewed religion as
all those people who fought against sci-
ence and education.
“I tried to say there’s a more construc-
tive way to think about these questions. A
lot of the big questions are human ques-
tions, not just religious or science. We
need wisdom from where we can find it.”
So Rabbi Mitelman left his synagogue
in 2014 and created Sinai and Synapses.
It is an organization that promotes the
Who: Rabbi Geoffrey Mitelman
What: Rabbi Salkowitz Memorial Lec-
ture and Distinguished Speaker Series
When: Saturday, January 12, 4:30-8
p.m.
Where: Temple Israel, 475 Grove Street,
Ridgewood
10 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
Rabbi Geoffrey Mitelman sees common ground between science and religion.
conversation between religion and science.
One of its projects works with select
synagogues that have “top-notch amaz-
ing” scientists among their members.
Those scientists are encouraged to take
public roles in their congregations. “We
give them a little mentorship and guid-
ance to help them integrate their science
work and their Jewish life,” Rabbi Mitel-
man said.
These scientists are encouraged to speak
both in their own synagogues and to other
congregations, and to share their work in
other ways, including writing on the orga-
nization’s blog.
Sinai and Synapses also has a fellowship
that brings together scientists, writers, and building deeper relationships with people
clergy of different faiths.
“Academics and clergy tend to be iso-
lated from each other,” he said. “There’s
wisdom an astrophysicist can give to an engagement
Episcopalian priest. There’s wisdom a
rabbi can give to a doctoral student. They
learn from each other and go out and cre-
ate content and programs in their own
communities that are influenced by their
new ideas.”
Rabbi Mitelman hopes to launch a new
program to help synagogues “use the sci-
ence of positive psychology and human
flourishing to engage 10- to 17-year-olds.”
Positive psychology “aims to ask, ‘How
do we create more meaning and deeper
engagement in whatever we’re doing?
These are things Judaism talks about all
the time. Prayer can create a deeper level
of engagement to be fully present. Judaism
commands us to turn off our cell phones
for Shabbat, for however many hours you
actually do that. It creates a deeper level
of engagement in whatever you’re doing.”
One focus of positive psychology is
— something that is a focus of synagogue
life as well.
“Teenagers are looking to create more
in their lives,” Rabbi Mitel-
man said. “They’re looking to thrive, hop-
ing to make a difference in their world, not
just tick off the next piece for their college
resumes. How can we equip them with
some tools to really flourish?”
In recent years, much of the conver-
sation about religion and science has
been led by the so-called New Athe-
ists, writers like the biologist Richard
Dawkins, who published “The God
Delusion” in 2008. How does Rabbi
Mitelman respond to them?
“I find that a lot of the New Atheists
are absolutely brilliant scientists who
tend to have a straw-man argument
against religion. They tend to rally
their base. They are not bringing the
best arguments of one side against the
best arguments of the other.
“They’re not interested in talking to
a person of a religious persuasion to
say, ‘Why do you connect to religion?
What value do you find in it?’”
He said that Richard Dawkins para-
doxically has “been very detrimental
for the teaching of science, because
he alienates so many religious people.
People tune him out.”
So what would he say if Rich-
ard Dawkins asked him why he
was religious?
“I see religion as a set of tools and a
worldview that provides tremendous
joy and tremendous meaning to me,”
he said. “It helps give me language to
think about things I wouldn’t necessar-
ily know how to articulate. It gives me
wonderful texts to be able to grapple
with and learn from and interpret and
respond to. It helps me give structure
to my life with a calendar and ritual.
And it allows me to find incredible
joy and meaning. It’s not something I
would use to be able to understand the
origins of the universe, to understand
quantum physics or the big bang theory
or even evolution. That’s not something I
turn to religion for.”
As an example of finding language
for experience in religion, Rabbi Mitel-
man tells of his encounter with the
Grand Canyon.
“If you’ve ever been to the Grand Can-
yon, you can’t really put it into words,” he
said. “It’s so massive and old and beautiful.
Your jaw drops. I found words from the lit-
urgy. ‘Ma gadlu ma’asecha Yah — How great
and how deep are your works, Adonai.’
“Seeing how the Colorado River spent
millions and millions of years to create the
Grand Canyon. The level of depth we can
go into. That allows me to have words not
just to describe the Grand Canyon, but to
impact how I deal with people. I can ask
how I can go deeper when I’m in conversa-
tion with others.
“I don’t necessarily believe that God
literally made the Grand Canyon, but
with religion I can experience something
that I wouldn’t have been able to put
into words.”

Volunteer packers at last year’s event included from left, Ruth
Goldstein, NCJW member; Gail Hutnik; and Elizabeth Halverstam,
NCJWBCS co-president.
NCJWBCS takes snack pack challenge
On Tuesday, January 15, at 12:30 p.m.,
members of the Bergen County section
of the National Council of Jewish Women
will meet at Temple Emeth in Teaneck to
pack 1,500 snack packs. That’s up from
the 1,000 they packed last year.
NCJW BCS members and guests will
pack child-friendly, healthy goody bags,
which will be donated to the Center for
soap
JCC PATRON OF THE ARTS AND THE KAPLEN FOUNDATION PRESENT
myth
the
January 27, 7 pm
KAPLEN JCC on the Palisades TAUB CAMPUS |
Courtesy NCJWBCS
Food Action for distribution to school-
children on Friday afternoons, to pro-
vide weekend nutrition. The packs con-
tain individual servings of fruit, cereal,
and other wholesome, appealing foods.
The NCJW BCS welcomes all to help.
For more information, go to www.
ncjwbcs.org, email office@ncjwbcs.org,
or call (201) 385-4847.
AwithREADING
ed asner &
tovah feldshuh
411 E CLINTON AVE, TENAFLY, NJ 07670 | 201.569.7900 |
Briefly Local
Lubavitch on the Palisades
to hold 23rd annual gala
Lubavitch on the Palisades
of Tenafly will hold its 23rd
annual gala dinner and
auction on January 13 at
the Rockleigh. This year’s
honorees are Michelle and
Omid Dardashti, Jacob
Linker, Stephanie and
Eric Rabbani, and Sharon
Tuch. All the honorees
have devoted much time Omid and Michelle Dardashti Jacob Linker
and energy to their com-
munity and to Lubavitch
on the Palisades.
The dinner’s theme cel-
ebrates grandparents and
parents who are “Passing
the Torch” of Judaism to
their children and keep-
ing the Jewish traditions
and heritage thriving
through Lubavitch on the Eric and Stephanie Rabbani Sharon Tuch
Palisades.
There will also be an auction, dancing, and music.
Dinner reservations, ad copies, and auction raffle tickets are available at
www.chabadlubavitch.org/dinner.
For more information, call (201) 871-1152 or go to www.chabadlubavitch.org.
The critically acclaimed Soap Myth, by
Jeff Cohen, starring the legendary 7-time
Emmy Award winner Ed Asner and
featuring 3-time Tony Award nominee
Tovah Feldshuh, dramatically explores
the Nazi atrocity of soap. The Soap
Myth questions how a survivor survives
surviving, and asks who has the right to
write history - those who have lived it and
remember, those who study and protect
it, or those who would seek to distort and
desecrate its very existence.
VIP $100 Exclusive for JCC Patron of the
Arts subscribers
Includes reserved VIP seating, meet
and greet dessert reception with photo
opportunity
PREFERRED $50, priority seating
GENERAL $25
TICKETS
jccotp.org/soapmyth
For more information, contact
Nina Bachrach 201.408.1406,
nbachrach@jccotp.org
jccotp.org
Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 11
Cover Story
‘Lost and Found’
Exhibit at the YU Museum shows faces, connections, emotion, depth, and history

JOANNE PALMER

T
he exhibit at the Center for
Jewish History, in Manhat-
tan, just south of midtown,
is not particularly big, but
it positions itself in a viewer’s mind,
heart, and imagination like a sprawl-
ing Victorian novel, mainly Dickens
but also partly George Eliot, because
of its strong women protagonists.
It’s got an underlying plot that takes
you from beginning to end, but it also
spirals out other plots — eccentric,
driven, or lovelorn characters whose
stories we hear only in part but who
could star in novels of their own; side
excursions into history, and sociology;
a look at the changing borders and
accompanying changing place names in
ERSITY MUSEUM

unstable, revolutionary early-20th-cen-

tury eastern Europe; wild coincidences;
nearly unspellable and to untutored
Americans entirely unpronounceable

ARAVICIUS
Lithuanian names, which sometimes
COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIV

bore only minor resemblances to their

COURTESY JUOZAS FED

Jewish names; strikingly beautiful and
breathtakingly sad images; the pre-
23&Me instinct to connect to family, a
postmodern meta plot turn; the night-
mare evil of the Holocaust, and despite
that, survival and growth and hope.
That’s a lot for one exhibit to carry off.
On Sunday, January 6, Dr. Jacob Wisse,
the exhibit’s curator, will talk about the
exhibit at Congregation Rinat Yisrael
in Teaneck; the exhibit will be at the
museum until March. (See box.)
In 1943, Annushka Matz Warshawska, a
musician; a daughter, wife, and mother;
a cultured, well-educated, and attrac-
tive upper-middle-class Lithuanian Jew,
who had been herded into the Kovno
ghetto and soon would be processed
to her death in a concentration camp
called Kloga, managed to get her family’s
photograph album to a friend, Teresė
Fedaravičienė, a butcher’s wife, who was
not Jewish and lived right outside the
ghetto’s walls. Dr. Jacob Wisse
Annushka was one of 11 siblings —
most, including her, from her father’s first marriage to a least in Lithuania, photography was considered to be a
mother who eventually died, as so many women did, her
body worn out from so many pregnancies and childbirths,
and four from her father’s second wife. Her father headed
a Jewish publishing company that printed siddurim and
Left, Annushka Matz Warshawska; right, Terese Fedaraviciene, who saved Annushka’s
album, stands with her husband Adomas.
machzorim, some in more than pictures taken.
one language, Hebrew and Lithu- Most of the exhibit is of photos in Annushka’s album, or
anian, as well as a sort of proto- of the people in those photos. We see heavily posed pic-
coffee-table book, illustrated with tures, their subjects staring out at us as grimly as if their
photos of Vilna. faces did not include muscles that allowed them to smile,
Annushka, like many of her fam- whole families positioned like the Addams family, if the
ily members, was musically gifted; Addams family were eastern European Jews. We also see
she sang in a chorus, and some- pictures posed with backdrops; one particularly charming
how, astoundingly, some of its picture is of a young man posed in a very early aeroplane.
music has been recorded. In the less formal photos, we see a family at the beach. We
A n nu sh k a’s p h o t o a l b u m see many photos of Annushka’s two daughters, the older
included both posed and more one, Frida, more reserved, the younger one, Bella, so alive,
informal pictures that allow view- so vivid, that the knowledge of what happened to her is
ers to trace the history of photog- even more unbearable than it would have been otherwise.
raphy. Dr. Wisse explained that at Historians tell us — and we can see — that those early
photographs often were turned into postcards. Many
bit disreputable — sort of like acting in western Europe prints of each successful shot were produced, and fami-
— so its practitioners tended to be people with lower lies would send them out to far-flung relatives. It was, in a
social standing. Like, say, Jews. So early Lithuanian photo way, a physical connection.
studios often were run by Jews, and Jews often got their Annushka and her family were involved in the arts,

12 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019

 Cover Story

COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

so the photos include actors and singers
famous in that time and place. (There’s
also one of Marlene Dietrich, famous
also here and now.) They also ran a san-
itarium, a summer camp in the country
whose mission seems to resemble the
Fresh Air Fund’s.
It was a family with education, talent,
wide-ranging interests, beauty, and obvi-
ous charm.
Seventy or so years after Annushka
gave the album to her neighbor, Teresė
Fedaravič ienė’s grandson, Juoz as
Annushka, in the striped top, sits with friends at the beach at Palanga, a resort town on the Baltic Sea.
Fedaravičius, and his wife cleaned out

She tried to keep

memories of their
having existed
alive in the world,
VICIUS

Annushka, Leonas,
even as they
RTESY JUOZAS FEDARA

and a friend had

were hounded their photograph
taken in a studio,
to death.
COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

peering through an
airplane backdrop.
their house; his father, Antanas, had died.
The album hadn’t been exactly forgotten
— they knew it was there, in the house
they’d inherited — but it had been left
alone because they didn’t know what to
do with it.
Now, they were faced with a choice.
There’s a video of the grandson in the
exhibit, sitting in front of a house so
brightly, happily painted that it makes the
viewer wonder what colors the clothing in
the black-and-white pictures would have
been. (Although black and white is more
artistic, more evocative, more haunting,
it also provides far less information to a
COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

Annushka and
viewer trying to imagine what life looked Leonas’s two
like.) The grandson says that it did occur to daughters, Frida
him for a second just to toss the thing — so and Bella
much easier! — but his wife said no, and he
realized that she was right. It was old, but
it mattered.
So they gave the album to the local his-
torical museum, and two people — nei-
ther of them Jewish, themselves driven,
extraordinary, with backstories — an Eng-
lish photographer, Richard Schofield,

JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 13

Cover Story
who is so obsessively interested in Lithu-
anian history that he moved to Kovno and
devotes his life to it, and a local historian,
Saulė Valiūnaitė, who works at the Vilna
State Jewish Museum, decided that they
had to trace it. The people staring out from
it deserved their names. The two worked
tirelessly to trace the links that led to more
and more stories.
Another thread that shines through this
tapestry is the loving and brave work that
non-Jews do for Jews.
Eventually, through much sleuthing,
much of it online and through Facebook,
Mr. Schofield and Ms. Valiūnaitė were able
to find some relatives who had survived the
war. In a plot twist that might have seemed
over the top had it been fiction, it turns out
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14 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
that one of the siblings had escaped Lithu-
ania and then escaped Europe. She and her
husband and children lived in Montreal.
That family was Masha Matz Roskies, her
husband Leo, and their four children, Ben-
jamin, Ruth, Eva, and David; two of the sib-
lings grew up to be famous Jewish academ-
ics. Dr. David Roskies teaches Yiddish and
Jewish literature at the Jewish Theological
Seminary; his book “Yiddishlands,” with its
stories of his family, including their names,
was an important link in the chain that con-
nected the Lithuanian Matzes with his fam-
ily. Dr. Ruth Wisse, who teaches Yiddish and
comparative literature at Harvard, is Jacob
Wisse’s mother. (Dr. Jacob Wisse, the cura-
tor, is the director of the Yeshiva University
Museum, one of the five institutions that
Important dates?
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The Community College Opportunity Grant is
administrated through the New Jersey Office of the
Secretary of Higher Education.
make up the Center for Jewish History.)
Pieces of the story came together.
Jacob Wisse and his siblings grew up
with his grandmother’s album; many
of the photos in that album either are
exactly the same as the ones in Annush-
ka’s or they clearly were taken at the
same studio session, with different poses
but the same clothing. The family can
piece together their history.
Some of the side stories are fascinat-
ing, deeply human, inescapably sad.
Annushka was married twice. She and
her first husband, Samuil Isakovitsh, sep-
arated, and he left, went back home, on
the other side of the border that sepa-
rated Lithuania from Russia.
She and her second husband, Leonas
Warshawsy, who also was married, met
This portrait of Bella, Annushka, Frida, and Leonas, from around 1930, is the
only one to show the family together.
at a reception. We do not know whether
or not there were sparks between them;
we do know that nothing seems to have
happened then, but in a few years,
they were openly in love and wanted to
marry. Annushka needed a divorce.
So she found her estranged first hus-
band in Russia — he was in the Russian
army — and bargained with him. He
agreed to a divorce, but she had to send
their daughter, Lyuba, their only child
together, to live with him in Russia when
she turned 14.
Annushka went back to Leonas with
her divorce documents, the two married,
and had two daughters together; Leo-
nas vanishes from history just before the
ghetto is liquidated, and Annushka, Frida,
and Bella, are murdered by the Nazis.
COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM
Bella, Annushka’s
youngest daughter,
loved to dance.
 Cover Story

d
d
n

,
-
e

Above, Samuil Isakovitsh, Annushka’s first husband, when he joined the Russian army in 1910.
Right, Ruth Wisse, now a scholar at Harvard and Jacob’s mother, then a child on ice skates in
Czernowitz, in the Ukraine, in 1939. COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

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JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 15

 Cover Story

What about Lyuba? She was a student in nieces and nephews.

Moscow during the Russian revolution, and
became a revolutionary; eventually she was
rounded up and sent off to Siberia, where
she too vanishes from history.
It’s hard not to try to imagine yourself into
her story, although it’s impossible to imag-
ine you’re doing it accurately. Was Lyuba
betrayed and abandoned twice, first by her
mother and then by her country? Or did she
want to go? Did her mother think that some-
how she’d be safer in Russia than in Lithu-
ania? Her face stares out at the viewer, and
her story haunts.
What is incontrovertible is that the branch
of the family that survived has thrived. When
the exhibit opened, they gathered, Masha’s
grandchildren and great grandchildren, who
also are Annushka’s grand and great grand
Annushka Matz Warshawska gathered pho-
tographs for the same reasons we all do. She
wanted to be able to remember what happi-
ness had looked like, and to remember the
people she loved when they were young, and
middle-aged, and old. She saved them, put-
ting both herself and her neighbor at risk, for
reasons most of us do not have to think about.
She tried to keep memories of their having
existed alive in the world, even as they were
hounded to death.
She succeeded.
She created links between her family then
and now, and the art and beauty of those
photographs, and the stories that they tell,
and the stories of their discovery reveal, tell
us a great deal about her, about her family,
and about us.

Sandi M. Malkin, LL C
Interior Designer Many of Annushka’s relatives gather at the Yeshiva University Museum’s
opening. COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

(former interior designer of model

rooms for NY’s #1 Dept. Store)

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 Our CurriCulum
• 
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Registration for Summer Camp 2019 is open now!
• High Reach curriculum
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• Handwriting without tears
• 
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 Two of Annushka’s grand nieces stand in front of a photo of Lyuba, left,

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info@GanAviv.com Mon-Thu
 7:30 am - 6:30 pm Annushka’s oldest daughter, and her first cousin Sala, at the Lost and

  
Fri 
7:30 am - 5 pm Found exhibit. COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM
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 Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey
welcomes

Teachers and Educators

to an

Anti-Bias & Diversity Training

Wednesday, February 6, 2019
4:30 - 6:00 pm
Jewish Federation
50 Eisenhower Drive, Paramus
RSVP Today!
jfnnj.org/training

BIAS HATE

Above, Annushka ran a sanatorium for

children; here she stands with some of the
children she hosted. Left, her dashing first
husband, Samuil, on a faux park bench in a
AriellaN@jfnnj.org | 201.820.3946
studio in 1914. COURTESY OF YESHIVA UNIVERSITY MUSEUM

SWEET TASTES OF TORAH

Community-wide evening of education
Presented by the North Jersey Board of Rabbis

Conversations on Zionism Today

About the talk
Who: Dr. Jacob Wisse, the director of the Yeshiva University
Museum
What: Will talk about the exhibit, “Lost and Found: Adventures of a
Family Photo Album Lost in the Shoa,” now on view at the museum.
When: On Sunday, January 6, at 8 p.m.
Where: At Congregation Rinat Yisrael, 389 West Englewood
Avenue in Teaneck
For more information: Call (201) 837-2795 or go to www.rinat.org
About the exhibit
“Lost and Found” is at YU’s museum at the Center for Jewish
History, 15 W 16th Street in Manhattan, between Fifth and Sixth
Avenues. The exhibit will run through March 10. Information is online
at www.yumuseum.org.
There's no doubt that the topic of Israel
stirs up controversy within the broader
Jewish community. Following Havdalah,
Rabbi Josh Weinberg, URJ Vice President
for Israel and Reform Judaism, will deliver
a keynote on Is Love of Israel Conditional.
Breakout classes will focus on the role Israel can play in the
lives of contemporary Jews. Lively discussions are guaranteed
based on various approaches to the topic: moral, political,
religious. Dessert, Israeli folk dancing, and schmoozing follow.
Saturday, February 2
Temple Beth Rishon, 585 Russell Avenue, Wyckoff
Doors open at 6:30 p.m.
$15 per person pre-registered by January 29; $20 per person at door
Questions? 201.652.1687 sweettastesoftorah@gmail.com
Program and online credit card registration at
www.sweettastesoftorah.weebly.com
Or mail your check, payable to the North Jersey Board of Rabbis:
32 Franklin Place, Glen Rock, NJ 07452
Name(s): ________________________________ Email: __________________
Phone:____________________________________ Cell: _________________
For security reasons, please include names of ALL attendees

JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 17

Editorial
Thinking about pictures
T successor, Heather Nauert,
he faces. Those extraordinary
faces.
I found it almost impossible
to stop staring at those faces.
The Center for Jewish History is on a
pretty block just east of Chelsea; it sits
between lovely old townhouses, a short
walk from Manhattan’s controlled chaos
but apart from it. Yeshiva University’s
museum is one of five Jewish institutions
that made up the center.
The exhibit that we write about this
week, “Lost and Found: Adventures of
a Family Album Lost in the Shoa,” with
the dozens of big, good photographs that
line its walls, is particularly compelling.
We know that six million Jewish lives,
six million Jewish worlds, were lost in
the Holocaust. We see some photos of its
victims, and every time we look at one
of them, when we look at someone and
we know that her end was terrible, dic-
tated by monsters — no, by monstrous
human beings; there was nothing super-
natural or other-worldly about them — it
is devastating sad, and also impossible to
understand.
But these photos also tell other stories,
stories about class and history and art
and changes over time.
They also point out an unfair but
unavoidable truth — that as fascinating as
the pictures of anybody can be, the pic-
tures of attractive people are even more
so. They make you stare longer, and with
less embarrassment.
They also show how much like each
other we are, despite differences of
clothing and haircuts and the way we
each are training to hold ourselves and
smile or glare at the camera, to look at it
or to look away from it.
Of all the stunning photographs in this
exhibit, two most caught my imagination.
One is of two cousins, young girls, both
of whom died, one in the Holocaust, one
in the Russian revolution. Both are gor-
geous. One is dark; the other, a blonde
with eyes that are clearly light-colored,
even in the black-and-white photo
although we can’t tell if they’re blue or
green, looks amazingly little Alice Liddell,
the girl whose picture Charles Lutwidge
Jewish Editor
Joanne Palmer
Standard Associate Editor
Larry Yudelson
1086 Teaneck Road
Community Editor
Teaneck, NJ 07666
Beth Janoff Chananie
(201) 837-8818
Fax 201-833-4959 About Our Children Editor
Heidi Mae Bratt
Publisher
James L. Janoff
Associate Publisher Emerita
Marcia Garfinkle
thejewishstandard.com
18 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
Dodgson took, and who, as Lewis Carroll,
he wrote about in “Alice in Wonderland.”
Those two girls lived at different times, in
different places, and despite their physi-
cal resemblances had very different lives.
But the resemblance is striking.
The other photograph is taken at a
beach on the Baltic Sea. A group of peo-
ple in the foreground, clearly happy
with each other’s company, dressed in
bathing costumes (which are similar to
but different from bathing suits), relax
comfortably, while other people, in the
background, wearing various fascinating
variations on bathing dress, stand closer
to the water.
The photograph is fascinating both
for the story it tells — it’s an early snap-
shot, informal, natural — and for what
it evokes.
At the same time that this group, happy,
wealthy, carefree, with no idea what was
going to happen to them, I know that my
grandparents might have taken a week-
end day to go to Coney Island or Orchard
Beach, where there would have been
more people and less money, but no
looming Holocaust. (Although certainly
many of the young men on the beach in
the late 1930s would have ended up in
the U.S. armed forces.)
I also think about the impulse to find
family. That’s the impulse that would
have compelled people to send copies
of their photographs to their relatives
around the world. It’s also the impulse
that compels us now to spit into test
tubes and send the unsavory results to
23&Me, and then find out that we have
hordes of cousins, distant, yes, but
related to us nonetheless. The Ashkenazi
Jewish world is so small, and we are so
tied together, that coincidences and sur-
prises abound.
Photographs tell stories; even more,
they mainline emotion through our eyes
directly to our hearts, sometimes side-
stepping our brains, sometimes engaging
hearts and brains simultaneously.
And sometimes, as with the photos
taken now, that show the children of the
families that the Nazis could not root out
entirely, they are pictures of pure joy. —JP
Correspondents
Warren Boroson
Lois Goldrich
Banji Ganchrow
Abigail K. Leichman
Miriam Rinn
Dr. Miryam Z. Wahrman
Advertising Director
Natalie D. Jay
TRUTH REGARDLESS OF CONSEQUENCES
Will Nikki Haley’s
fill her shoes?
W
ith Senate confirmation funder of global terror.
hearings for Heather Nau- In briefing after briefing, Nauert made it
ert — President Donald unmistakably clear that the hatred and dis-
J. Trump’s pick to replace cord being sown across the world by Iran
Nikki Haley at the U.N. — now on the hori- would be met with the strongest sanctions,
zon, the question of experience has come to and that any countries that sought to violate
dominate the conversation. those sanctions would be held responsible.
And who could replace Nikki Haley Nauert also has used her platform to give
anyway? a voice to those suffering under the brutal
On its face the question of experience rule of the mullahs. In a tweet last October,
would seem designed to score political Nauert again stood up for the people of Iran,
points, given that Nauert ranks at num- calling on the Islamic Republic to embrace
ber four in a State Depart- the type of religious tolerance
ment that employs 75,000 introduced to the world by
people and Vox reports that Cyrus the Great, who assisted
Nauert is a “key member” his Jewish subjects in erecting
of Secretary of State Mike the Second Temple in Jerusa-
Pompeo’s policy team. lem, then under his control.
I recently met Nauert at her “The Iranian regime should
office at the State Department. learn a few lessons from his
Don’t be fooled by her leadership and stop persecut-
pleasant poise and polish. She ing #Bahais, Christian con-
is made of steel. Rabbi Shmuley verts, #Gonabadi Dervishes
This is the woman who, for Boteach and other minority groups
the past two years as chief in #Iran” — shedding light on
State Department spokesper- crimes entirely ignored by
son and under secretary for public policy Obama during his negotiations with Iran.
and public affairs, has been the instru- When members of the Gonabadi Dervish
ment for one of the most muscular foreign community was murdered at the hands of
policies in American history. Iranian government — one in a summary
Nauert is the one who was charged with execution, and the other at the hands of his
going before the media and the world interrogators — Nauert used her platform to
explaining President Trump’s summary make both their sacrifice and the true face
execution of President Barack Obama’s of their murderous government known
disastrous deal with Iran, re-enacting throughout the world.
sanctions, and bringing the Iranian rial to Nauert has used her position to draw the
its lowest point in years. If you think every- world’s attention to Iran’s total disregard for
one applauded, think again. democracy and the human rights of even its
Obama’s appeasement of Iran had been non-minority citizens. When Iran’s revolt-
embraced by most of Europe. Nauert had ing leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, laugh-
to communicate the brutality of Iran in ably claimed Iran had the world’s only “real
a way that is convincing to a world for democracy,” Nauert reminded the despot
whom expediency of making billions off that “real democracies don’t arrest labor-
Iran was greater than the principle of not ers for peacefully protesting about their
empowering a regime that is the foremost unpaid salaries.” In a world that has, for the
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is the author of 30 books, including his most recent, “The Israel
Warrior.” Follow him on Twitter @RabbiShmuley.
Advertising Coordinator
Jane Carr
Production Manager
Jerry Szubin
Founder
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Editor Emeritus
Meyer Pesin (1901–1989)
Bob O'Brien
Robin Frizzell City Editor
Brenda Sutcliffe
Mort Cornin (1915–1984)
Administrative Assistant Editorial Consultant
Jenna Sutcliffe Max Milians (1908-2005)
International Media Placement Secretary
P.O. Box 7195 Jerusalem 91077 Ceil Wolf (1914-2008)
Tel: 02-6252933, 02-6247919 Editor Emerita
Fax: 02-6249240 Rebecca Kaplan Boroson
Israeli Representative
BEAUTIFUL
BEGINNINGS
WINTER 2019

A supplement to the Jewish Standard

FIRST PLACE
Kosher CATerer
S-3 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

New year, new trends.................................................... 4

What will 2019 weddings look like?
Wedding trends through the decades............................ 5
Let them eat crullers.................................................... 6
Out-of-the-cake-box ideas for wedding desserts
Consider the lighting.................................................... 8
How lighting sets the tone of the event
Color theory............................................................... 10
How to make color palettes work for you
Nautical nuptials........................................................ 12
Everything you need to know for a wedding on the water
A couple’s guide to common money myths.................. 14
ON THE COVER: Natalie and Lee Greenberg of Mahwah were married on
August 19, 2018, at The Grove in Cedar Grove. The bride is the daughter of
Cheryl and Jeffrey Hayet of Wayne, and the groom, the son of Sue and Mitchell
Greenberg of Paramus. Rabbi Randall Mark of Congregation Shomrei Torah in
Wayne officiated. Photo by Giulianna Marie Studios

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New Year, New Trends
What will 2019 weddings look like?
Heidi Mae Bratt
very year couples seek new and unique details
to include in their wedding ceremony and recep-
tion. When it comes to 2019 wedding trends,
brides and grooms can find updates to currently
popular designs and innovative ideas that have
not been seen before at weddings. Here’s some
of what’s in store for the upcoming year.
Signature and Customized Cocktails
At Northern Valley Affairs at Temple Emanu-El in Closter,
owner Les Friedman said signature drinks, “his and her”
cocktails with a play on the names of the groom and bride,
have become the rage. For example, couple Mark and Pam
served their guests “Mark’s Manhattan” and “Pam’s Pome-
granate Martini.”
“Signature drinks have become very popular,” Mr. Fried-
man said. The caterer also has customized drinks in the
wedding color scheme, like serving blue infused drinks
when blue or purple is a dominant color in the wedding.
Statement Wedding Cakes
There is something iconic about a wedding cake, so for
those who are going cake they are going big and bold. The
WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS
confections range from classic white to eye-catching color. Purple is Replacing Pink
Believe it or not, warm bronze, soft gray, pale blue and When considering 2019 wedding trends, pale pinks are
gold are some favorite fondant tones. That takes the cake. retreating and shades of purple are taking center stage.
Lavender and other darker hues of purple are the new “it
Sculptural Floral Installations color,” replacing blush and pink. Think bluebell roses or
Floral installations became the hot new design. The floral various shades of purple in the accessories. Using the color
installations can include a wall of roses, an exploding bou- of royalty, purple can be light and airy or very bold and
quet as a centerpiece, or something as unusual as flower dramatic.
placemats. Floral installations are still popular for 2019,
but the trend will bring even more unique sculptural instal-
lations, which are placed on the table.
Sunday Weddings on the Rise
Couples have been adding multiple events to their wedding
weekend, including welcome parties, after parties and
post-wedding brunches for years, but instead of ending the
weekend at the brunch, they’re planning the big event for
Sunday. The wedding weekend is stretching from Friday to
Sunday, especially when the family is Sabbath observant.
Polka Dot Wedding Wear
Whether the bride is inspired by dotted lace fabric on her
veil on in her dress, or the groom has bold or subtle polka
dots on his tie or bow tie, the look of the perennial polka
dot, always in style, will walk down the aisle in 2019.

Rust is the New
Hot Metallic
Metallics have evolved from shiny sil-
vers and golds to matte copper and
brass, and now they’re progressing
to rust. When using rust in your wed-
ding palette, include a brighter color
to ensure that it doesn’t look too dark.
Rust goes well with navy and grey and
rust paired with cream and burgundy
are a good look, experts say.
Brides are Opting for
Classic Beauty Looks
Bridal beauty is going classic. A big look
for brides includes wine-colored lips
with full lashes or a metallic eye shadow
and soft pink lip. Faux lashes are nearly
used all the time because they enhance
the eyes (especially in photographs)
without having to add more makeup
to the skin. The look for hair is half-up-
sweeps that frame the face with some
hair softly gathered in the back of the
head.
Plants and Herbs
as Table Decorations
Instead of traditional flowers, some cou-
ples are still looking to include greenery
in their reception décor, but are select-
ing something other than foliage. White
ceramic, black ceramic, and wood boxes
are some of the modern-style containers
being used.
Black Accents
A chic choice for any wedding color
palette, expect to see black accents on
tablescapes far and wide. The stark
contrast in colors from a light-colored
centerpiece to the sophistication of say
black candlesticks can make a display
really stand out.
Velvet and Lucite
That plush and rich fabric, velvet, will
be making a very big play in the coming
year. Different tones and textures of vel-
vet add an element of timeless elegance
and classic feel. Lucite gives the décor a
very contemporary vibe. The lucite can
be used in flatware, name cards or table
numbers.
Pastels
Trend forecasters say that celadon green
will have a big moment next spring. The
minty green is just one of the many pas-
tel colors that will frequent wedding
color palettes in 2019. Match with lav-
ender, beige, and pale blush shades to
capitalize on the marbled, earthy qual-
ity of this beautiful color.
Keeping it Neat
A tidy table for guests with an immac-
ulate place setting—free of virtually
everything but the charger, menu, and
napkin—are both photographically and
spatially pleasing. This way the focus is
on the food and on the fun.
Vellum Paper Goods
These almost-sheer paper accents are
ones to watch for in 2019. Vellum is used
in myriad ways, calligraphed for escort
cards, an overlay for invitations, and
envelopes with beautiful hand-drawn
artwork on the inside. Vellum is one of
the many ways paper goods are evolv-
ing. Expect to see other unique medi-
ums, like leather, suede, acrylic, and
even gold leafing, they add.
Balloon Walls
For some couples, balloons are the new
flowers. No longer just for kids parties
or New Year’s Eve, they can make won-
derful celebratory décor for weddings.
Wedding trends through the decades
Heidi Mae Bratt
Wedding trends have evolved during the
decades. From the length of the dress to the
size and number of tiers of the cake, trends
for nuptials have been informed by the cul-
tural hegemony of the era.
Check out the trends through the de-
cades.
1900s
Where did the tradition of a bride wear-
ing a white wedding dress originate? You
can thank Queen Victoria’s choice of wed-
ding gown color when she married Prince
Albert. The dresses of the early 20th cen-
tury also featured S-shaped corsets for
that ever-decreasing waist, high necklines,
puffy sleeves, and frilled bodices.
1910s
Henry Ford and the Model T and the onset
of more automobiles riding the nation’s
new roads helped launch the first out-of-
town weddings. In addition, honeymoons
that were farther away were also on the
rise. Makeup, that is, mascara and eye
shadow, also became more popular. Brides
left the natural look and wore a more dra-
matic face when they said their “I do’s.”
1920s
Flapper fever and the roaring 20s informed
the style in general, and of particularly
weddings, which became more informal.
Wedding dress hems were knee-high and
hairdos were short bobs topped with a
headdress, putting aside the traditional
veil. In fact, weddings became so informal
that many city hall marriages and elope-
ments were not uncommon.
1930s
The tradition of bride and groom cake top-
pers had its start in the 30s. This was the
wedding indulgence because The Great
Depression influenced weddings consid-
erably. Instead of buying a wedding gown,
brides pored through their closets and
found the most elegant dress they already
owned. If brides were able to get a white
wedding gown, after they got married,
they dyed it and wore it again on another
occasion.
1940s
Many brides-to-be waited for grooms
because of the onset of World War II. So
that meant that weddings were centered
on the groom’s deployment. Sometimes,
Jewish Standard S-5
weddings announced at the beginning of
the week took place that very weekend.
With supplies scarce, wedding parties were
much more simple.
1950s
Hollywood and Grace Kelly, who took the
world by storm with her high collar, lace-
sleeved dress, informed the look of brides
this decade. Also popular were ballerina-
length dresses and sweetheart necklines.
Gloves became de rigueur, and bouquets
got grander and bigger.
1960s
Flower power and the launch into space
went into the wedding halls. The most
popular flower was the daisy, a nod to the
hippie movement. In addition, shiny details
a la NASA were popular touches at wed-
dings. Pillbox hats, made trendy by Jackie
Kennedy, were also a headdress must-have.
The empire waist also was a big look.
1970s
The 70s can be described as a mélange of
trends because the country was in transi-
tion. The free-loving 60s was to become
the rah-rah and conservative 80s. Outdoor
weddings became more formal, and wed-
ding vows — influenced by the feminist
movement — dropped the “obey” promise
from the wedding vows.
1980s
Long, long trains and veils, and sleeves that
had enough poof to rise, all thanks to Prin-
cess Diana’s iconic wedding gown in her
marriage to Prince Charles in 1981, made
every bride want to be a princess. The dress
was bigger, the cakes were bigger, and even
the hair was bigger. It was a big decade.
1990s
Sleek and slinky. Spaghetti straps and little
detail. After the big 90s, wedding style went
in the opposite direction. Lots of movies
informed the decade, including “My Best
Friend’s Wedding” and “Runaway Bride.”
2000s
Weddings began to take place in hotels and
country clubs, and less often in churches.
That meant that brides could wear more
strapless ball gowns. With the less formal
church ceremony atmosphere, at the wed-
ding party bands, DJs, and partying into
the night, became the standard. For the
sweet touch, traditional towers of cupcakes
replaced traditional wedding cakes.
S-6 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

Let them eat crullers

Out-of-the-cake-box ideas for wedding desserts
Kristen Castillo
Dessert is a sweet way to end any meal and
a wedding is no exception. But who says you
and for mail order. Flavors change de-
bride’s head. The bride and groom then pending on what’s fresh and in season
shared the crumbs. from local farms.
Over time, cakes have gotten sweeter

Creators.com photcourtesy of Karra Leigh Photography

have to just serve cake?
Wedding cakes date back to ancient
Rome when — for good luck — a cake of
wheat or barley was broken over the
Pie, Please!
Many couples and their guests are saying
“yes, please!” to pie for dessert.
“Pies are the opposite of the overly for-
mal, too-pretty-to-eat vibe of traditional
wedding cakes,” says Mariana Leung,
event designer at Wicked Finch Farm,
who says pies are a natural fit for rustic,
bohemian weddings.
and now they’re not even the only treat
dished out on the big day. Here’s a look at
the sweet indulgences making a statement
at wedding receptions and dessert tables.
Pies make a nice presentation, too.
Leung has seen brilliant displays of small
pies, as well as larger pies, stacked in a
wedding cake configuration. There are
great color combinations by alternating
fruit pie, like apple or cherry, with rich
fillings like chocolate or banana.
You can make your own pies or buy
them. Bubby’s bakery sells pies locally
Doughnuts
Doughnut displays have been all the rage
at weddings lately and for good reason.
They’re budget-friendly and taste amaz-
ing. Plus, they photograph well. Insta-
gram and Pinterest are filled with images
of impressive doughnut walls. Hint: search
#DoughnutDisplay
While the doughnut walls are easy to
make with pegboard and loads of round
doughnuts, your dessert table isn’t lim-
ited to circular sweets. Set up a plate of
doughnuts as a practical centerpiece for
each table. Or use tiered plates to create
your own delicious doughnut table featur-
ing a variety of your favorites like glazed
crullers, doughnut bites, chocolate-frost-
ed with sprinkles and yes, powdered
Stack cookies like these colorful
doughnuts. (Note to brides: White sugar
macaroons create an eye-catching
will blend right in with your dress; just be
and tasty dessert tower.
careful with that jelly filling!)
For a fancy approach, you can do tray- to cupcakes and more. The custom-made
passed doughnuts with a chocolate or party treats look like traditional cakes on
caramel dipping sauce. the outside but break the exterior and
candy spills out!
DIY Desserts
Wedding guests love an experience. Inter- Farewell Sweets
active dessert stations, ranging from build- Often brides and grooms offer their des-
your-own ice cream sundaes to candy sert to go. Pastry chef Alisha Falkenstein
tables to make-your-own s’mores are gain- at Kimpton Hotel Vintage creates macaron
ing in popularity. Other out-of-the-cake- cookie towers. Guests can grab a macaron
box dessert ideas include cotton candy, or two to enjoy in the moment or at a later
mini cupcakes, tarts and pastries. time. Milk and cookies has become another
“Instead of the traditional wedding popular staple for the end of the wedding

Plan your next event in our cake, we’ve seen a lot more dessert bars,”
says Tasha Bracken of SD Events, who
notes having variety at the table gives
party.

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Elegant Ballroom guests options to customize their treat.

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One of Bracken’s clients wanted board-
walk-style treats for her dessert bar, an
homage to the bride’s summers spent on
the Jersey shore. That dessert table fea-
tured waffles with ice cream and displays
of the bride’s favorite candies, as well as a
chocolate fountain with a variety of fresh
fruit for dipping.
These DIY stations satisfy a sweet tooth
and double as entertainment; that’s a
wedding win-win.
Smash Cakes
The newest wedding dessert trend is like
an edible pinata. It even comes with a mal-
let for smashing. LA SmashCakes is whip-
ping up handmade, candy-filled chocolate
piñatas in a variety of shapes from hearts
Customized cheese plates are a sweet (and
often savory) option for wedding des-
serts. While the display doesn’t need to be
extensive, it should feature a few varieties
of cheese, including ones most appealing
to all guests, such as cheddar, Gouda and
Parmesan. Add in some of your other faves
like Stilton, Brie or manchego. Pair the
cheese with nuts and fruits — the perfect
mix of sweet and salty.
Offer up coffee, tea or cider, too. And no
matter what desserts you serve, be sure to
provide guests with plenty of napkins.
Kristen Castillo is a three-time Emmy Award-
winning journalist. An editor and writer for
wedding magazines, she’s written hundreds
of wedding articles, as well as an e-book,
“Weddings on a Dime.”
 Jewish Standard S-7
Creators.com photcourtesy of Karra Leigh Photography

Anastasia Romanova Photography

26 Paris Avenue, Rockleigh, NJ
www.therockleigh.net • (201) 768-7171
S-8 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

Consider
the lighting
How lighting sets
the tone of the event
Kristen Castillo

W
edding planning is filled with details: picking
the perfect save-the-date cards, choosing a
fitting color scheme and designing the ideal
menu. But have you thought about lighting?
It might seem like a nonissue; whether the venue has
windows, lamps or chandeliers, you may think that as
long as everyone can see what’s going on, that’s all that
matters. But think again. Lighting is about more than
illuminating a space.
“When it comes to lighting, I say go big or go home,”
says destination wedding planner Aviva Samuels of
Kiss the Planner, who plans weddings and events in

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Florida, Mexico, the Caribbean and more.
“Lighting is an expensive proposition but
it can really take your event from ordinary
to extraordinary.” Consider these lighting
styles and techniques to complete your
wedding aesthetics.
In the Mood
“Lighting can be used to set the tone, mood
and feel for an event — it can completely
transform a space,” says Dee Wood, senior
catering sales manager at The Ballantyne
luxury hotel in Charlotte, North Caro-
lina, which hosts weddings most week-
ends throughout the year. Don’t just use
white lights. Spin the color wheel instead.
“The color used enhances the mood of
the event,” says Woods, who explains that
oranges and soft yellows create a cozy feel,
while purple and blue uplights create an
energetic vibe.
Samuels notes that an easy way to set the
mood for the party is to “simply dim the
existing lighting fixtures or eliminate them
altogether by simply turning them off.”
Find the Focus
“Always focus lighting where you want
your guests eyes to go,” says Greg Jenkins,
partner and co-founder of award-winning
event planning and production company
Bravo Productions. Do you want to high-
light an area, like the cake table? Or do you
need to draw attention away from an area?
“You can always use pipe and drape to
mask areas in the venue,” he says. Echo-
ing Samuels, he adds, “Another option is
to turn off lights where you don’t want
guests to notice.” He warns couples not
to use green lighting to highlight the food
station because it makes the food look
unappetizing. Some colors like burgundy
can be rich, but they can also be too dark
and, therefore, wash people out. He rec-
ommends soft pinks and peach to make
guests look great throughout the event.
Once you figure out whom or what fea-
tures you’d like to draw attention to, find
the most desirable color and shade.
Don’t Skimp
According to Samuels, couples should go
all in with lighting. “The problem with not
going full impact is that it can sometimes
look worse than what you started with, if
it’s not done fully,” she says.
As an example, uplights around the pe-
rimeter of the room close to the walls can
look beautiful, shining light and color. But
if you don’t use enough, the resulting look
appears striped, not a consistent and over-
all wash of color. The fix is to add more
Having
Jewish Standard S-9
an
uplights around the perimeter or wash
the walls with color from a distance. “If
the lights are elevated and placed on ‘light
trees,’ they shine across the room and
affair?
have a wider wash,” Samuels explains.
She also suggests using pinspot lighting,
a focused beam of light directly overhead,
to illuminate your tables and centerpieces:
“This is highly effective when it comes to
opening the door to the room and seeing
the drama immediately, versus not really
getting a good look at the beautiful floral
centerpiece until you get close up to it.”
Going all out with lighting might seem
too high-drama, but it can actually create
a balanced and wholesome aesthetic.
FIRST PLACE
Perfect Patterns SPECIAL OCCASION
Project unique patterns on a wall, ceil- DRESS SHOP
ing or dance floor with gobo lights. Wood 2011-2018
notes that they personalize an event and
can “add a whimsical and fun touch.” Tem-
plates can be customized, such as a design
with the newlyweds’ last name, initials or
a logo. Or go with a standard pattern like
hearts or stars. This offers more design
freedom and flexibility with choices.
Camera-Ready Come see the
The right lighting will highlight your most
flattering angles. Wedding photographer Largest Selection
Joanna Moss says, “I love when brides con- of Eveningwear,
sider adjusting the lighting at reception
venues when they see it’ll be dark or unflat- Sportswear, and
tering on their wedding day.” And there are
many clever ways to do so. Simply draping
Accessories, too!
a sheer white fabric can soften the look
of the venue’s standard yellow overhead
lights, she notes. You and your guests will
be ready for awesome photo-ops.
Budget Tips
Great lighting is even possible on a bud-
get. Jenkins suggests spending money on
Mishelyne’s
lighting instead of extras like pricey lin-
ens, as the right lighting will make decor
look less plain. Candles are an affordable
Fashions
option, and they create a warm, romantic
look, too. And most importantly, Samuels 885 Teaneck Road
advises focusing on one lighting method: Teaneck, NJ
“Make sure to do it right, rather than trying
to do a little bit of each type.” 201-862-9595
With lighting done right, everything Sun & Mon Closed
about your wedding will look better, from
the cake to the guests. Play around with
Tues to Thurs 9:30-6
these ideas to transform your space into Fri 9:30-5
something magical. Creators.com Sat 9:30-6
Kristen Castillo is a three-time Emmy Award-
winning journalist. An editor and writer for
wedding magazines, she’s written hundreds
of wedding articles, as well as an e-book, www.m-fashions.com
“Weddings on a Dime.”
S-10 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

Color theory How to make color palettes work for you

DiAnne Crown at your wedding will set the stage.

A
re you more of an island paradise girl, a smooth
champagne and wine lady or a primrose bride? Do
you envision a glamorous setting, or something
more edgy? Whatever your style may be, the colors
Selecting a wedding color palette can be as easy as
knowing what colors look best on you, or perhaps pick-
ing a color scheme that evokes a certain mood. Or it
could be much trickier; it isn’t always easy once you’ve
wandered into the world of color hue, intensity and
value. Yes, there is a science behind the lovely art of
color choice.

Color Theory Basics

The Best Selection of • Hue. What color is it? Think of the distinctly different
Talliot and tones of red, blue and yellow; or orange, green
Kippot anywhere. and purple.
Exquisite Styles • Intensity or saturation. How vivid is it?
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To select a pleasing palette, first select your favorite hue,
Lisa Prawer and then consider your “drama” level. Certain high con- color palettes, generate your own palette and modify col-
Convenient Bergen County Location · 201-321-4995 trast colors opposite each other on a color wheel can be or shades. For other color generators, visit the Elegant
vivid when paired. Similar shades next to each other on Themes online blog, where you’ll find a collection of rec-
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the color wheel can be soothing. One or two rich colors ommended sites for web designers that are also useful for
alongside a neutral white or black can be evening elegant, anyone creating a color scheme.
A DAZZLING SMILE whereas several bright colors can create a sense of festivity Simone Hill’s “8 Steps to Choosing Your Wedding Col-
in the afternoon.
FOR YOUR WEDDING! ors” can be found on The Knot’s website. There, Hill
walks readers through setting, season, mood and more.
What’s Trending? And wedding flower sites by Teleflora and Martha Stew-
Just as decorators browse color chip fans and paint depart- art offer a beautiful way to coordinate a color palette with
ment displays, wedding designers and other party plan- the flowers of your choice.
ners can consult color generators to begin a design for invi-
tations, attire, flowers and place settings. Seasons and Textures
Click through a variety of color palettes in the color
Consider your wedding season, says Rachel W. Miller’s
generator at https://coolors.co, where you can browse
“4 Tips for Choosing Your Wedding Colors,” but don’t let
it limit you. “Each season has obvious choices, but that
SIMPLY WHITER TEETH™
doesn’t mean it’s limited to those colors, or that you can’t
Cantor use seasonal colors any other time of year. One trick I love

Barbra is to think of the colors associated with certain seasons

throughout history or in different countries. For example,

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0002441714-01.qxd 10/15/08 5:09 PM Page 1
a December wedding doesn’t have to be red and green;
in the 1950s and 60s, winter pastels and metallics were
Certified Cantor with all the rage for the holidays. Or consider a citrusy palette;
TEANECK DENTIST 12+ years
BAR & BAT of pulpit
MITZVAH
oranges have
MAGAZINE ADlong been associated with Christmas in dif-
ferent regions.”
a reason to smile 0002441714-01
Lessons in experience
your home And texture may make a compromise color work for
Learn to read Hebrew LIEBERSTEIN, BARBRA
you and your partner, Miller continues. “A wedding with
Fri, Oct
beige24,calligraphy
2008 and white silk accents looks far differ-
Richard S. Gertler, DMD, FAGD
Group and1 cols,ent2.13
from xa wedding
2.50" with rustic cotton bouquets and neu-
Ari Frohlich, DMD Learn to tral wood accents. If you love a color and aren’t sure if
Sami Solaimanzadeh, DMD
private lessons
Process Free
read Hebrew it’s right for your wedding, think about how you can use
in your home
Lisa Spadevecchia
texture to make it work.”
Parent Paper
1008 Teaneck Road • Teaneck Officiant atCantor CarineFinally, though...
BarbraCeremonies,
Bar/Bat Mitzvah
201.837.3000 201-818-4088 It really is a day to do what you please. You can decide
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www.teaneckdentist.com ___ Art Direction
match. With one eye toward the look you want in your
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___ OK AS IS

___ OK W. CHANGE
 Jewish Standard S-11

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S-12 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

Nautical nuptials
Everything you need to know
for a wedding on the water

Creators.com photo courtesy of Danielle Richards Photography

Sharon Naylor Cover the Basics

I
Find a reputable yacht company and a
n search of the perfect wedding venue
wedding coordinator who specializes in
— a place with spectacular views and a
yacht weddings. Many yacht companies
sense of wonder — a growing number of
employ their own wedding planners, who
wedding couples are choosing to hold
have experience working on your particu-
their big days aboard yachts. Established
lar boat. A professional planner who knows
yacht companies may have dozens of dif-
the ins and outs of weddings on your vessel
ferent styles and sizes of yachts in their
can point out needs and decisions vital to
fleets, from smaller boats ideal for more
the success of your day and can help run
intimate weddings with smaller guest lists
things smoothly.
to enormous yachts for 200-plus guests,
Before you embark on the task of se-
with grand ballrooms, elegant staterooms
lecting your wedding yacht, it’s essential
and glamorous decor. Yacht weddings cre-
to have a few of your wedding plans set.
ate a destination wedding feel, an escape
Know your budget so that you can con-
from the usual types of wedding venues in
sider yachts within your means and you
your area, with spectacular photo oppor-
don’t torture yourself with dreams of a
tunities in every direction and a VIP feel.
larger, more expensive yacht. You’ll also
Yachts weddings offer fabulous views and deck space for celebrations and
photo-ops.

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need to know the size of your guest list
because yachts have strict capacity and
weight limits.
“It’s most advisable that you set up
tours of the yachts in a company’s fleet so
that you can see and feel the realities of
the boats,” says Camille Cerria, nautical
event planner for Smooth Sailing Celebra-
tions. Though it may seem to be a smart
savings of time and effort to peruse gor-
geous photos of various yachts in a fleet,
nothing can compare to boarding the
boat and seeing everything for yourself.
During your tour, walk through all rooms
and ballrooms, decks and gathering spac-
es, and check out the bathrooms.
Choose a boat with both indoor and
outdoor space to provide beauty, as well
as plan B settings, in case of any kind of
bad weather, including summer heat.
Get Your Team Together
Some companies have official teams —
including caterers, floral designers and
bar staff — working on particular boats.
Many companies will give you a list of their
preferred vendors, known to them as good
performers on their yachts, and your event
coordinator can negotiate to get permis-
sion for an outside vendor you would pre-
fer to be hired for your event.
An important issue is the yacht’s kitch-
en. Your caterer will need a kitchen that is
big enough for his or her needs, with large
enough ovens and refrigeration units.
Ask your wedding planner about licens-
es required for an officiant to perform
your ceremony aboard the boat. You may
think a ship’s captain can marry you, but
in reality, there are many factors at play
regarding the legality of an officiant. For
instance, your captain may be required to
be a justice of the peace or a minister. It
all depends on where you’re sailing and
what the rules of nautical officiating are.
Learn the legalities so that you’re not
inviting trouble. The same rule applies
about the insurance needed for boat wed-
dings. You don’t want your insurance to
be marked as invalid because of a broken
rule, such as bringing more guests aboard
than the ship’s capacity. “Always check
with your nautical wedding planner to be
sure you’re in compliance with the boat’s,
the state’s and other legalities,” says Cer-
ria. Your planner can do the work to be
sure you’re in the clear.
Choose Sail or Dock
If you’re nervous about sea motion dur-
ing your yacht wedding, you may be able
to arrange for your wedding to take place
while the boat remains docked. With no sail-
ing in open seas, you might avoid the motion
of swells and waves that can contribute to
queasy stomachs and affected movement. “I
like to have candied ginger available for wed-
ding guests,” says Cerria. “It’s a sweet treat
that can help manage seasickness symp-
toms.” In addition to potential comfort, a

docked boat may be boarded by late-arriving
guests. A boat at sea would leave late arrivals
stranded on the dock. “Set an arrival time
for an hour before the start of the ceremony
or sailing time to avoid missed connections,”
Creators.com photo courtesy of Danielle Richards Photography
says Cerria.
Choose Your Wedding’s
Dining Style
“Buffets are usually the most successful
style of food service,” says Cerria. “Guests
may not want to be stuck in their seats at
a formal dinner when there are so many
decks and glass-covered areas to enjoy on
the yacht. Set up food stations in the main
dining area, and offer separate food sta-
tions and bars around the boat for guests’
ease and enjoyment.” Sit-down dinners
can be arranged, of course, if that is your
desired style of food service.
You may also wish to blend styles, such
as having a sit-down dinner and a dessert
buffet.
Choose Your Decor
Trending decor items for yacht weddings
include driftwood, anchors, lighthouses,
Emporio
Emporio has a vast col-
lection of ties for your
event. New this season,
our special occasion
collection ties are avail-
able in 30 shades and
in matching quantities for your party.
Made in Italy, smaller quantities are
usually in stock, larger orders require
a six-week turn around. We can also
match any postage-size swatch for a
Jewish Standard S-13
shells, rope tied in nautical knots, and
nautical flags. You’re not stuck with a red,
white and blue color scheme. Nautical
accents can fit into any palette.
Choose Your Wow Factor
Some wedding couples arrange for fire-
Book your next
works displays to light up the night sky and
seascape when the sun sets on their wed-
ding day. Your wedding planner can help
event with us!
you hire the ideal fireworks company and
time the show for a spectacular end to your
dream yacht wedding.
Depend on your wedding planner to
cover all of the details of your yacht wed-
ding, including this important aspect: Be For more information, call 201.568.6867 or
sure that your vendors will be granted ac- email info@templesinaibc.org
cess to the boat far enough in advance of
your wedding’s start for them to be able
to perfect all of their preparations so that
your timeline can proceed smoothly. That
way, you can enjoy your wedding day with-
out worrying. Creators.com
Sharon Naylor is the author of “The Bride’s
Guide to Freebies” and three dozen other
wedding books.
custom shade.
Emporio is located at 215 W. Engle-
wood Ave. in Teaneck (201) 530-7300
with other locations in Brooklyn, Long
Island and Lakewood. 1 Engle St, Tenafly, NJ 07670 | templesinaibc.org
S-14 Jewish Standard WINTER 2019 BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS

A couple’s guide to common money myths and that you don’t really need to save money
now, while things are tight and you are strug-
gling to get going. But that’s a myth. The
will build something into your marriage
that money cannot buy: trust.

Mary Hunt
The wedding was complicated and expen-
sive. But it’s over, and now it’s time to settle
in and enjoy your new life together.
Lucky for you, I’m here to warn you
about some common money myths that
newlyweds have been known to bring
with them into their marriage.
Myth: Double the income, half the
expenses - Fuzzy math: Merging your lives
and incomes into one household is the
equivalent of getting a raise. Don’t believe
that — not for a second.
Counter: Start out living on only one
income, and save the rest. This will re-
quire going against everything our culture
insists you deserve, but it will allow you to
move seamlessly into parenthood. When
that day comes, you’ll have an impressive
savings account and options — and a gal-
lery of envious friends.
Myth: There’s stuff we can’t live with-
out - No, there isn’t. But it will be easy to
convince yourselves that you absolutely
must have matching furniture, new cars
and all kinds of gadgets and services to
make your lives easier and keep up with
your expectations, to say nothing of your
friends.
Counter: Make a pact that you will nev-
er go into debt for “stuff.” Period.
Myth: If we qualify, we can afford it -
Whether it’s a new credit card or a new
nothing-down, interest-only mortgage for
a house that you know in your hearts you
cannot afford, never allow your ability to
qualify to be the determining factor. If you
cannot pay the entire credit card balance in
full each month or if the mortgage plus the
insurance, taxes and maintenance is more
than 30 percent of your net income, you
can’t afford it. Getting in over your heads
is the recipe for a marital disaster.
Counter: Never think of a credit card
company, real estate agent or mortgage
broker as a financial adviser. They are
salespeople looking to close deals. Get ad-
vice from a wise person who will not bene-
fit financially from the decision you make.
Myth: We have plenty of time - It does
seem as though you have a lifetime ahead
truth is you cannot afford to go one more
day without a savings commitment, for
many reasons. You will want to retire. You
do not want to feel forced into debt when
something unexpected happens. You do
not want to get used to spending all that you
have. You want to create a sense of security
and peace in your marriage.
Counter: Think of 10 percent of your
net income as a mandatory savings ob-
ligation, just like your rent or mortgage
payment. Pay it to yourselves without fail
starting right now, if not sooner.
Myth: Some money issues are best
kept private - Whether it’s the $40 pedi-
cure you launder through your grocery
tab using the convenient cash-back fea-
ture, the $80 cash you collected from your
lunch buddies when you put the whole tab
on your credit card, or a secret credit card
account, keeping money secrets from your
spouse is not good for your marriage. You
might be able to pull off financial infidel-
ity for a while, but eventually, it will come
back to bite you.
Counter: Start out with a commitment
to full disclosure and total honesty. That
Myth: Everything will be fine as soon
as we make more money - It does make
sense that if you are struggling now, you
won’t once you get a big raise or finish
school or get your grandmother’s inheri-
tance or win the lottery. The truth is that
more money will never be enough until
you learn how to manage well the money
you have already.
Counter: Make the necessary adjust-
ments now to live beneath your means.
That will ensure that when more money
comes into your lives, you’ll know exactly
how to take care of it.
Myth: It’s too late - No matter how long
you’ve been married or how difficult your
situation may appear, it’s not too late. It
will take longer and be more challenging,
but you can turn your situation around.
Two people committed to reaching a single
goal is a powerful force.
Counter: Decide right now that you
are going to do whatever it takes to debt-
proof your marriage. Creators.com
Mary Hunt’s column, “Everyday Cheapskate,”
can be found at creators.com.

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past decade, tried to downplay Iran’s evils in the hope of lucrative
nuclear accords, Nauert’s efforts to lift the veil on the regime’s awful
record have never mattered more.
With regard to the horrific civil war still playing out in Syria, Nau-
ert has been at the front line of the administration’s efforts to stem
civilian deaths in Syria, and make the butcher of Damascus Bashar
al-Assad pay a price for his use of poison gas against his own people.
When reports emerged that Assad did exactly that in Duma in April
of 2017, Nauert made it clear that Assad’s use of chemical weapons
was “not in dispute.” She conveyed that the United States would
“use all efforts available to hold those who use chemical weapons, in
Syria and otherwise, accountable.” “Russia,” she insisted, “with its
t unwavering support for the regime, ultimately bears responsibility
- for these brutal attacks.”
Nauert has also emerged as one of the world’s leading advocates
, for Syria’s White Helmets, a group of a few thousand volunteer res-
cue workers who have saved more than 70,000 lives since the Syrian
. civil war began. A makeshift emergency response team, the White
Helmets were featured in an academy-award winning Netflix docu-
l mentary, earning the world’s awe for their courageous operations
r, to save helpless civilians amid the aerial bombardments of Assad’s
, blood-drenched offenses.
The White Helmets have been targeted across Syria for their work,
with seven members being executed this past spring as they slept,
y awaiting the next emergency call. Beyond facing unthinkable physi-
cal dangers, the White Helmets are also being globally maligned by
pro-Assad forces and periodicals, such as Sputnik and Russia Today,
- each of which has accused the group of having terrorist connections
. simply because they operate in rebel-held areas. Of course, those
are the areas being ceaselessly bombarded by Assad and his Rus-
sian enablers.
- Even former Pink-Floyd front man Roger Waters, a rabid anti-Sem-
- ite who has made it his life’s mission to destroy Israel economically,
stopped a Barcelona concert to tell his audience that “the White Hel-
mets is a fake organization that exists only to create propaganda for
jihadists and terrorists.”
y Amid all of this, Nauert repeatedly employed her powerful
. platform at the State Department to voice American backing
for the struggling organization. In statements, briefings, and
f even tweets, Nauert has gushed with unequivocal support for
y the “incredible group of individuals” known as the White Hel-
mets. “The Assad regime and Russia continue to falsely accuse
the White Helmets through a massive disinformation campaign
leaving its volunteers at significant risk,” Nauert told reporters
this past fall. Speaking in no unclear terms, Nauert asserted that
“we recognize and appreciate and are very grateful for all the
work that the White Helmets continues to do on behalf of the
r people of their country and on behalf of the US Government
and all the coalition forces.” With her signature eloquence, Nau-
- ert made the case for “these heroic first responders [who] have
- one of the most dangerous jobs in the world” she said this past
June, “and continue to be deliberately targeted by the Syrian
t regime and Russian airstrikes.” She also paid solemn tribute to
- the “more than 230 of these brave volunteers [that] have been
r killed while working to save innocent Syrian civilians.”
The ability to convey American values with courage and convic-
tion on the floor of the UN is the ultimate qualification for the ambas-
sadorship. Adlai Stevenson is best remembered for his bold confron-
tation with the Soviet ambassador at the height of the Cuban missile
crisis, during which he declared his adversary to be standing “in the
courtroom of world opinion.” Patrick Moynihan is best remembered
for his heroic defense of the State of Israel in a speech where he
railed against the “Zionism is racism” resolution of 1975. And with
Nikki Haley will go down in UN history as a mighty protector of a tiny
American ally that is the only democracy in the Middle East.
From what we’ve seen of Nauert over these past two years, she
will follow in the path of her greatest predecessors, giving voice to
American values and to those suffering the brutality of dictatorships.
Nauert has used the State Department as a platform for the world’s
victims and a warning to despotic governments across the world.
At the U.N., she will be an American hammer against despots who
destroy human life and bullies who brutalize their people.
Opinion
Seeds of redemption
T
his past Thanksgiving I had the good for- just one life, he is considered to have saved an entire
tune of spending quality time with my
tweenager on a mother/daughter bat
mitzvah trip in Israel.
Organized by Emunah and led by Rebbitzin Lisa
Septimus, yoetzet halacha of the Five Towns and
Great Neck, 20 of us (eight mother/daughter and
two grandmother/granddaughter pairs) followed the
theme of doing chesed (good deeds) as we explored
the country’s history and daily life. Some memo-
rable chesed moments were interspersed with vis-
iting such sites as the Haas Promenade, Ir David,
and Kever Rachel, as well as perspective-changing
places such as Dialogue in the Dark (aka the Blind
Museum), and an exciting spelunking adventure
in the Charitun Caves in Tekoa. We packed food at
Pantry Packers, the food distribution arm of Tzeda-
kah Central/Colel Chabad. We handed out treats to
chayalim at Pina Chama. We had a bat mitzvah party
with the girls from Simcha L’Yeled. We spent Shab-
bos at Emunah’s Beit Elazraki Chil-
dren’s Home.
In stepping outside their norm,
the girls had the opportunity to think
about their place in a world that
extends beyond their day-to-day lives.
Yes, middle school provides the first
stepping stones on the path from ado-
lescence into adulthood. But there’s no
substitute for literally walking on those
same stones in a place where that com- Dena Croog
ing of age is palpable. The trip my
daughter and I took this late fall was a
hands-on introduction to what it means to become
a bat mitzvah.
Visiting Yad Vashem was, expectedly, intense and
meaningful as it relates back to our Jewish history
and where we’ve come to now. It was established by
an act of the Knesset in 1953 as “a monument and a
name” — the literal translation of Yad Vashem — to
memorialize the 6 million Jews who were murdered
during the Holocaust, as well as to commemorate
those who fought for the survival of others during
one of the darkest periods in our history.
I had been to Yad Vashem before, and on this trip
I was particularly taken by the “Garden of the Righ-
teous Among the Nations,” which honors the 27,000
non-Jews who risked their lives to save Jews during
the Holocaust. In this section, trees were planted in teenage girls made for National History Day.
each “Righteous” person’s honor, symbolizing the
lives that were saved as well as the lives that sprung of lives with the thousands of ways that have memo-
from them and the generations that will continue to
grow thereafter. When there was no more physical
space for trees, names were displayed on the wall to
commemorate these Righteous Gentiles. Some peo-
ple saved thousands of Jews, others saved just one.
But as the saying goes, even when a person saves
Dena Croog is a writer and editor in Teaneck and
the founder of Refa’enu, a nonprofit organization
dedicated to mood disorder awareness and support.
Learn about the organization and its support groups
at www.refaenu.org, or email dena@refaenu.org with
questions or comments.
The opinions expressed here are those of the authors, not necessarily those of the newspaper’s editors,
publishers, or other staffers. We welcome letters to the editor. Send them to jstandardletters@gmail.com.
world. The size of the trees planted in the garden
do not vary based on how many lives were saved by
each person.
As you pass through the visitors center, at the
entrance to the garden, there stands a tree com-
memorating Irena Sendler, a Polish social worker
who did indeed save many lives. It has been noted
that she and those working under her lead in War-
saw saved about 2,500 children.
I bring up Irena Sendler because of the nature by
which her courage was brought into the spotlight.
In short: In 1999, three girls in a high school
in Uniontown, Kansas, worked on a project for
National History Day that focused on Irena Sendler.
Although Irena had been recognized by Yad Vashem
in 1965 and had received support from the Jewish
Foundation for the Righteous in New York City, the
students — and the world — knew very little about
her other than what was published in a short news-
paper clipping in 1994. The students
researched Irena’s story and created a
play called “Life in a Jar,” which was
picked up by the local press and was
then further recognized up the media
food chain until her story was told
worldwide.
One of the things I took away from
this story was the tremendous power
adolescents possess, and how impor-
tant it is to help them see this and strive
to actualize their potential. Here is a
story of an amazing woman who saved
thousands of children during the Holocaust — and
three ordinary high school students had the power to
bring her name into the public eye on a national scale
and identify the importance of her role in history.
Through the years, Irena Sendler’s story has contin-
ued to flourish. Schools have been named after her. In
Warsaw, a teaching award was named after her. The
Polish Embassy in Israel honored her with a stamp.
The Life in a Jar presentation has been produced
almost 400 times. There have been thousands of
media stories about her. Irena was nominated for the
Nobel Peace Prize. Movies, books, exhibits, and even
a musical score have been created. And most recently,
2018 was declared Irena Sendler Year in Poland. All of
this stemmed from a school project a small group of
This is not to equate the act of saving thousands
rialized that act. What it does illustrate is the mag-
nitude of the actions of a single person, whether
she be a social worker during the Nazi regime or a
school child in rural Kansas.
According to the 18th-century Jewish mystic
the Baal Shem Tov, “In forgetfulness is the root of
exile. In remembrance the seed of redemption.”
We as a people have faced anti-Semitism in every
generation, whether that be in ancient Egypt,
Nazi Germany, modern-day Israel, or Pittsburgh.
A sense of vulnerability exists as part of the Jew-
ish identity, especially in Israel on the heels of the
SEE REDEMPTION PAGE 20
JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 19
Opinion
How to teach the Holocaust going forward
I
magine that you are a
Jewish doctor in a Nazi
concentration camp.
About 100 of your fel-
low inmates suffer from diabe-
tes, and you have only a limited
supply of insulin, with no guar-
antee of more on the way. Do
you give each patient the same
amount regardless of individ- Ben Cohen
ual need, knowing that most
likely all of them will die within
a month? Or do you reserve your supply for those with a
greater chance of survival, meaning that those with severe
diabetes will die much sooner as a result?
Or imagine that you are the Greek Jewish teenager from
Salonika who’s picked up enough German from polish-
ing the boots of the Nazi officers occupying your city that
when you are eventually deported to Auschwitz, your lin-
guistic abilities land you a low-level clerical job, instead
of a spot in the gas chamber. In the camp administra-
tive office, you have access to the index-card system that
assigns each prisoner to a different slave-labor brigade
— most of which involves punishing physical work in the
freezing outdoors, with the risk of frostbite, pneumonia,
beatings, or even execution for those the guards think are
slacking off.
One of your fellow prisoners, who is near death, begs
you to sneak his card into the box of a different brigade,
one with lighter duties. As long as your Nazi overlords
don’t catch you, it’s in your power to do that. But if you
decide to help your friend, then you have to switch his
card out with that of another person from the same bri-
gade, and then that person spends his or her days facing
snow, ice, and death from starvation. What do you do?
And, come to think of it, how on earth did you end up in
this position?
The above documented examples are what many Holo-
caust scholars and educators like to describe as “choice-
less choices” — appalling moral dilemmas faced by peo-
ple who were systematically dehumanized by the Nazi
regime, and who knew that they faced death at any sec-
ond. Those dilemmas formed part of an intense, enriching
four days that I spent with a small group of other writers
and journalists at Yad Vashem, Israel’s official Holocaust
commemoration museum, memorial, and institute.
We were there to study and discuss many aspects of the
Holocaust—from choiceless choices to archive manage-
ment to Holocaust art—but we did so from a starting point
that the way we teach younger generations about the Nazi
attempt to destroy the Jews of Europe and North Africa is
Redemption
FROM PAGE 19
Holocaust. Yet so, too, exists resilience, regardless of
affiliation and practice.
In Israel, physically planting a tree is both an honor and
a practical act of survival. In a desert land, each tree must
be planted, nurtured, and cultivated so that it can provide
food and oxygen and assist in the natural progression of
life. When looked at as a metaphor for Jewish survival, in
relation to our children as they become bar and bat mitz-
vot, I think it is imperative that we teach them about our
heritage and nurture them on a constant basis so that they
may preserve our identity, culture, and faith and continue
20 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
changing radically.
Holocaust survivors all have reached advanced ages,
meaning that there won’t be any in-person testimonies
to listen to within a few years (even if we are left with
their accounts captured on video, holograms, or other
forms of visual reproduction.) Since 1945, countless other
genocides have wreaked havoc in the Balkans, much of
Africa, Asia, and the Middle East, while a few of those that
occurred before — the Herero nation slaughtered by Ger-
man colonists in southern Africa, the Armenians annihi-
lated by Turkey — remain under-recognized to this day.
Is the Holocaust, it is often asked, any more important
than these other demonstrations of inhumanity in the
world?
And there’s more, much more. In countries like Lithu-
ania and Ukraine, wartime Nazi collaborators now are being
lionized as anti-Communist heroes. The Israeli government
walks along an undignified diplomatic tightrope with these
states, having to balance present-day bilateral relations
with guardianship of the Holocaust’s truths. Elsewhere,
some Holocaust-commemoration activities are so fixated
with a universalist approach that basic facts about the Jew-
ish character of the genocide — like the young diarist Anne
Frank having been Jewish, and + being deported because
she was Jewish — are buried in a bid to be “meaningful” to
“everyone.”
Meanwhile, in Western Europe and the United States,
social protest movements, like the “Yellow Vests” in France
and the Women’s March in America, have been penetrated
by Holocaust-deniers, anti-Semitic conspiracy-mongers, and
advocates of Israel’s elimination. And that’s not to mention
those who don’t deny the Holocaust but do delight in invok-
ing the Nazis as a metaphor for Israeli policies towards the
Palestinians or go the whole hog by — check out the French
“comedian” Dieudonné M’bala M’bala — making fun of it in
theaters, front of receptive crowds.
In the recent past, perhaps the key Holocaust debate
was why the Allied powers did so little to stop it. Dur-
ing our group’s exchange with Avner Shalev, the chair of
Yad Vashem, who pioneered its renewal over the last two
decades, he told the story of guiding President George W.
Bush around the institute’s impressive museum. When
they reached the exhibit about President Franklin D. Roo-
sevelt’s response to the Holocaust, Bush turned to his then
national security advisor, Condoleezza Rice, and asked:
“Why didn’t FDR bomb the camps? He should have.”
But that burning question has been superseded by an
even more vexing one: Why should we seek to educate
about the Holocaust in a world where the phrase “Never
Again” sounds farcical to many people?
There are many answers; to my mind, three of them
the cycle going forward. Survival on a cultural level suc-
ceeds not only with a single seed but with many seeds
planted. Not with one bat mitzvah girl but in a group of 10.
And still, our tour group existed only because of each
individual girl. Or rather, each mother/daughter pair. And
so the lesson I would like to tell my daughter is not only
about the power of numbers but also that she, herself, has
the power within to change the entire world. The lesson I
would tell myself is much the same.
As we left Yad Vashem, a friend and I followed behind
our daughters and reminisced about our summer teen tours
in Israel — she on Machach and me on ACHVA — and how
interesting it would be to go on those trips as adults. In a dif-
ferent context, the places we visited would yield a different
Yad Vashem’s “Hall of Names” commemorates
Holocaust victims. DAVID SHANKBONE VIA WIKIMEDIA COMMONS
are key.
First, there still are some Holocaust survivors alive.
I think specifically of a man named Albert de Leeuw, as
well as 150 other former child laborers in the Amsterdam
ghetto, who still have not received proper compensation
from the German government, and who continue fighting
for that recognition in the twilight of their lives. To aban-
don them now would be shameful.
Second, however much people believe politics has
changed with the rise of populism on the left and the
right in the last several years, the Holocaust remains a
truly foundational moment of our era and the source
of many of the international institutions that, for good
or ill, manage international relations today. Look back
and you will see that the Holocaust changed a good deal
more than we realize — for example, how we look at art
and music, our relationship with technology, and our
agonizing about inclusiveness in our society. As we pre-
pare in 2019 to mark the 80th anniversary of the out-
break of World War II, expect much more reflection on
all that.
Thirdly, if we are to teach our children the basic facts
of the Holocaust, they can be boiled down like this:
Six million Jews died because they were dehumanized
because they were Jews. Many of them resisted, in a
variety of ways. And far too many were faced with the
choiceless choices that symbolize the reality of the
Holocaust. JNS.ORG
Ben Cohen writes a weekly column for JNS on Jewish affairs
and Middle Eastern politics. His work has been published in
Commentary, the New York Post, Haaretz, the Wall Street
Journal, and many other publications.
meaning. The amazing thing about this mother/daughter
trip, though, was that as adults we have the ability to expe-
rience multiple perspectives — through our own eyes as
moms, from the memory of our teenage selves, and through
the eyes of our daughters as they approach adulthood.
The opportunity to experience Israel with my daugh-
ter was both magical and meaningful. In addition to qual-
ity time, enjoying the sites and history of the land, and
partaking in acts of chesed, we learned about those who
helped us flourish despite the threats to our existence.
The trip in itself was testament to our growth and suc-
cess. And what I took home with me was the idea that we
must love and nourish our children, because they are the
seeds of redemption.
 Opinion

Anti-BDS laws are a constitutional

and PR mess. Here’s how to make them better

B
ERKELEY, Calif.—
Ronald Reagan infa-
mously described
the “nine most terri-
fying words in the English lan-
guage” as “I’m from the gov-
ernment and I’m here to help.”
Right now, pro-Israel activ-
ists are recoiling from the
unanticipated consequences David Schraub
of state laws which only
sought to “help” them fight
BDS, the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement
targeting Israel.
The precise content of the laws vary from state to state,
but in the main they prohibit state contractors from boy-
cotting Israel during the duration of their contract. Typi-
cally, this requires the would-be contractor to sign a dec-
laration disclaiming any such intent to boycott.
Twenty-six states have already passed legislation of this
sort, and two — Kansas and Arizona — have seen theirs
fail constitutional challenges. But the issue exploded back
onto the national scene when a Palestinian-American
Texas speech pathologist claimed she was terminated
from her position at her local school district after she
refused to sign a statement that she doesn’t boycott Israel.
The case already has become a public relations debacle
for the pro-Israel community. It has all the appearances of
an overbearing government thought-police pressing down
on the little guy, holding paychecks hostage in order to
demand ideological conformity on the merits of a country
two continents away. What possible business is it of Texas
what a random speech pathologist does or doesn’t think
about Israel? Condemnation has been swift and brutal,
and in many cases crossed partisan boundaries.
All of this was eminently predictable (indeed, the Anti-
Defamation League did predict it — in internal documents
at least). From the start, these state laws have been inter-
preted in manners that seem calculated to cause maxi-
mum embarrassment to those they purportedly “help”—
trying to block an academic speaker at Arizona State,
refusing to distribute hurricane relief aid in Texas, without
a commitment from the recipients not to boycott Israel.
It does little good to say “those are misapplications of
At the very least, this latest fiasco should be a cautionary
tale about relying on government to wage a fight that should
be won and lost in the open marketplace of ideas.
But no doubt some will be less keen on giving up legisla-
tive options altogether. Is there a way to craft an anti-BDS
law that is not, or at least less, prone to being applied (or
misapplied) in nakedly censorial fashion?
Rule One: Don’t write the laws as Israel-only one-offs.
While anti-BDS advocates often complain the movement
“singles out” Israel for stricter scrutiny, it is fair to rejoin that
many anti-BDS laws single out Israel for especially favorable
treatment. A Texas state contractor can decide to boycott
anywhere from Myanmar to Venezuela to France — but not
Israel. Why should Israel, alone among the nations, get the
special solicitude of an American state?
It shouldn’t. Boycotts targeting Israel should be governed
by the same statutory and constitutional standards as any
other boycott — no better, no worse. South Carolina’s “anti-
BDS” law provides a useful model: It does not mention Israel
at all. It covers boycotts of any jurisdiction “with whom South
Carolina can enjoy open trade,” and even then only when that
boycott “is based on race, color, religion, gender, or national
origin of the targeted person or entity.” People are just as lim-
ited in their ability to boycott French products as Israeli ones.
A law that singles out Israel appears to take sides in
a fraught ideological controversy. It is easy to feel for the
Texas pathologist who feels compelled to sign some sort of
pro-Israel ideological declaration. It would be harder for
her to muster the same sympathy if she objected to stating
that she would refrain from discriminating on basis of “race,
color, religion, or national origin.”
Rule Two: Anti-BDS laws also should restrict themselves to
the contractor’s behavior on the job. States do have a valid
interest in regulating how their contractors do the job they
were hired to do. They have much less legitimate investment
on how such contractors behave on their own time. Yet most
anti-BDS legislation requires a contractor to stipulate that they
will not boycott Israel, not just in the course of fulfilling their
state contract, but in any capacity for as long as the contract
is in force. The Texas speech pathologist, for example, cannot
refuse to buy an Israeli software program for her home office
while working for the school district, even if that software has
nothing to do with her work for the school.
It may be true, as law professor David Bernstein argues, that
misinterpretation and chilled speech is especially high. Take
a high school debate judge from a local college who receives
a form demanding that he, the “contractor,” forgo boycot-
ting Israel. It would be easy to see how he would perceive the
demand to be aimed as his personal, off-the-job conduct.
More importantly, it’s easy to see how an overworked and
uninformed school district administrator could believe that.
If the goal is to avoid bureaucratic mishaps and chilled
speech, it’s probably best to avoid regulating even the “busi-
ness” decisions of sole proprietorships — at least when they
are off the state’s clock. (The author of the Texas law has
signaled he wishes to amend the act so it no longer applies
to sole proprietorships.)
By contrast, states are perfectly legitimate in demand-
ing that contractors behave in nondiscriminatory fash-
ion in the course of fulfilling their contract. The state
might not have any valid interest in how its speech
pathologists stock their home offices, but it has a very
strong interest in confirming that they won’t, for exam-
ple, refuse to treat an Israeli exchange student or refrain
from using a valuable educational program just because
it was published by an Israeli company. Ditto the college
student judging a high school debate: What he does on
his own time is his business, but he certainly can’t claim
a free expression right to refuse to judge a round that
happens to have an Israeli competitor in it.
In sum, the ideal anti-BDS law is one that (a) applies not
just to Israel, but generally to boycotts of countries with
whom a state has open trade with, and (b) covers how
contractors fulfill their contract with the state, but not
their private, off-the-job conduct.
You might notice, however, that such a law starts to look
like a pretty general non-discrimination commitment. It
isn’t really an “anti-BDS law” at all. It’s just an anti-dis-
crimination law.
That’s no accident. When government actors jump in to
“help” fight BDS, specifically, they’re likely to do it with a
typical bureaucratic mix of grandstanding and ineptitude,
and the results usually are as terrifying as Reagan might have
predicted. But when they sit down and try to solve a general
problem — regulating state contractors as state contractors,
not as private citizens, and refraining from punishing people
for having the wrong ideology — they might be able to do
some common good. JTA Wire Service

the law.” When laws are drafted quickly and sloppily, with
much attention to the press release and little concern
towards the possibility of overreach or misconstrual by
the bureaucrats tasked with enforcing them, these are the
results you can expect.
the Texas law regulates the pathologist only as a contractor,
and not in her “personal life.” But such distinctions are easily
blurred in the case of sole proprietorships and independent
contractors, where personal and business purchasing deci-
sions often meld together. And in such cases the potential for
David Schraub is a lecturer at the University of California,
Berkeley School of Law and senior research fellow at
the California Constitution Center; he is also a doctoral
candidate in the UC-Berkeley Department of Political Science.

Letters

Music heals
Helene Emanuel’s December 14 obituary
in the Jewish Standard, as provided by the
funeral home, read “Donations welcome to
the Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra.” The
correct address for those donations is 311
Cornwall Rd., Glen Rock, NJ 07452.
Helene was a dedicated board member of
the Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra for 44
years. She knew that music helps us heal in
all different ways.
The Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra’s
next concert on March 16 at the Syriac
Community Hall in Paramus. It will be dedi-
cated to the memory of Helene Emanuel.
Randi Spaeth
Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra
But Obama was worse!
Funny how Rabbi Meir was not afraid
for his country when President Obama
enjoyed a baseball game with dictator
Raul Castro, shook hands with Hugo
Chavez, told Medvedev to convey to Putin
how he will have “more flexibility” after
the 2012 election and cozied up to the
mullahs in Iran eventually sending them
$1.7 billion in cash (“I am very afraid for
my country,” December 28.).
As the rabbi notes this country was built
on immigration, but he fails to mention that
it was legal immigration. The GAO found
that illegal immigrants cost the U.S. billions
more than any revenue they generated.
This was not the case decades ago since
there were no government welfare benefits
for them to illegally access. Today we don’t
know who is coming for economic opportu-
nity or economic opportunism.
Finally, Rabbi Meir apparently had no
qualms when the Obama administration
monitored reporters’ phone records and
issued subpoenas against other report-
ers to force them to reveal their sources.
Trump talks a lot, but Obama’s actions
against the press were far worse. Perhaps
the better question for Rabbi Meir is: Why
weren’t you very afraid for our country
during the Obama administration?
Michael Milchen
New Milford

Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 21

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22 Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019

 D’var Torah
Va’era: An act of mercy inspires justice

M
ost of us are familiar with
the plagues that struck
Egypt because they are
recited during the Passover
Seder. They are named in order and a
drop of wine is removed for each of the
plagues. Extracting that sweetness from
our meal is a symbolic way to empathize
with the Egyptians, whose suffering we
mourn even as we celebrate our freedom Rabbi Steven
at Passover. Sirbu
Modern Jews often read the story of the Temple Emeth,
Reform, Teaneck
plagues, the first seven of which appear in
this week’s Torah portion, and — no doubt
influenced by those ten drops of wine
taken from the cup at the Seder — lament the pain and
destruction that was required to let our people go.
Perhaps uncomfortable with the idea that the plagues
and reprieves. Again and again, Pharaoh sees important to contextualize the plagues as more than just
God’s power and, after making an empty a grudge match between two warring deities. If the story
promise to release the Israelites, God’s of the plagues is to have enduring value then its lessons
mercy. But until now Pharaoh hadn’t seen must be deeper and more nuanced than simply that God
mercy expressed as a caveat to the threat. was more powerful than Pharaoh.
No one had. Anyone could have avoided the In distilling the lessons that were intended for the Egyp-
hail by simply going inside, and those who tians, Leibowitz and Abravanel are really articulating the les-
recognized God did exactly that. sons that we are to learn from Parashat Va’era. A first read-
This intersection of mercy and punish- ing shows God of Exodus has immense power to punish
ment was identifiable even to the Pharaoh as and inflict pain; that is why we remove the wine from our
justice. And maybe Pharaoh pleaded guilty in cups. But by looking closely at the text, we can see that God
that moment because he realized that he was also has the power to reward faith, to exhibit mercy, and to
incapable of acting similarly. inspire justice. Let us also remember this when we grapple
Within our interpretive tradition, it is with the meaning of the plagues.

SHABBAT
‫בס''ד‬
are arbitrary and without greater meaning, biblical

AT
scholar Nehama Leibowitz (1905-1997) delves deeper
into the rationale for the plagues. She identifies ten

GETAWAY
LACKAWANNA STATION
places in the Exodus story that refer to the Egyptians HOTEL

knowing God.
Drawing on the scholarship of Isaac Abravanel
(1437-1508), Leibowitz distills three distinct les-
sons the plagues are supposed to teach the Egyp-
tians about God. They are that God exists, that God
metes out punishment for misdeeds, and that God
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WEEK
and beast that is found outside, not having been PUBLIC
brought indoors, shall perish when the hail comes
down upon you” (Exodus 9:19). The Torah reports
that there were two responses among the Egyptians.
Those who feared the word of the Lord brought their

JAN 21-31
livestock in and took shelter, and those who paid no
regard did not.
Pharaoh saw the destruction of the hail. In his POCONO RESORT
mind, at least, he had to realize that God could mete
out punishment and control nature. So he said to
Moses and Aaron, “I stand guilty this time. The Lord
is in the right, and I and my people are in the wrong” MILLENNIALS SHABBAT
(Exodus 9:27). The words tzadik and resha’im—right
and wrong — reflect a legal usage, according to
modern scholar Robert Alter.
SKI SHABBATON 18+
@ HISTORIC LACKAWANNA STATION HOTEL GETAWAY
RABBI SHAIS TAUB
I couldn’t help but connect these two unprec- PRESIDENTS WEEKEND
edented aspects of the seventh plague: the explicit
FEBRUARY 22-24
way for Egyptians to avoid the fiery hail, and Pha- FEBRUARY 15-17 AT THE HISTORIC LACKAWANNA STATION HOTEL
raoh’s acknowledgement of God’s justice and his
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Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 23

Kosher Crossword
“MOVIN’ ON UP” BY YONI GLATT
KOSHERCROSSWORDS@GMAIL.COM
DIFFICULTY LEVEL: MANAGEABLE
Across
1. Animated Explorer
5. Washington and Jefferson, once
11. Places for RNS
14. Residents: suffix
15. Brother of Charlie (Sheen)
16. Rare football ending
17. Where over 185,000 moved on up
from in 1990
19. Pure treif
20. Where over 105,000 moved on up
from between 1948-1951
21. Premier Khrushchev
23. Tesla’s Musk, and others
24. Where over 100,000 moved on up
from between 1961-1964
27. TV host Goodman
28. ___ Independence
29. Mimics
32. Went on and on about
33. Shoot using a scope, say
34. All time best sellers
38. So far
39. What a regular asks for, with “the”
40. Later, to Juan
43. Onion, for one
44. Oil option
45. Palindromic billing for some websites
48. Where over 52,000 moved on up
from between 1919-1948
50. It has legs and sometimes arms, but
no hands
52. Rapper Iggy
54. Where over 10,000 have moved on up
from since 2010
55. Neighbor of Swed.
56. Destination of those moving on up
60. “___ didn’t!” (denier’s phrase)
61. Deep, narrow valley
62. Sony laptop, once
63. A good king of Israel
64. “Limit, ___ customer”
65. Accompaniers of cover letters: Abbr.
The solution to last week’s puzzle
is on page 30.
24 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019
The Frazzled Housewife
Making sad funny
I
try to write a humor column every
week, sincerely hoping that any-
one who reads it gets at least one
chuckle. That’s the goal — just one receiving end of a shiva call, but I have
chuckle. (I would imagine that people
who do not like me and read my col-
umn give a few eye-rolls, but that is for position. The people who are uncom-
another time.)
This week’s topic, inspired by true
events, might be a little delicate. The
shiva house. There is nothing funny
about that. Families come together to
grieve for the loss of a loved one. Of
course, every situation is unique, every
situation is sad. I am not minimizing
any of that. I write this column because
sometimes, when things are very sad,
you need to laugh (or drink…). And here
we go…
This past week husband
#1 and I went to pay a shiva
call to a treasured mem-
ber of the community. It is
someone who, though we
are not close friends, we
feel a special connection to.
And because she and I both
Down spend our lives wasting our
1. Get rid of time on social media, we Banji
2. “Lawrence of Arabia” star know what is going on in Ganchrow
3. Estée Lauder competitor each other’s lives (or what
4. One from Tibet we post, anyway, because
5. No longer working: Abbr.
you never really know. Those folks who
6. It doesn’t fly in Oz
7. Container just got back from Italy could have some
8. Sequon got the ball from him this year major credit card debt. Who knows?) So
9. ___ Judah (Jewish symbol) when we saw that she was sitting shiva,
10. The face of 13-Down we knew we were going to go. Because
11. Where over 20,000 moved on up from
you can never do the wrong thing by
in 1991
12. Hilariously funny thing doing the right thing.
13. See 10-Down So we walk into the house and we sit
18. Lt.’s inferior down in the second row, because there
22. ___ the Sunshine Band were a few people in the first row. But
24. Luka Doncic, e.g., for short
as soon as we sat down, the front row
25. Miners find
26. “Maggie May” singer Stewart popped up, and the woman sitting shiva
28. Used to be exclaimed, “But I am not contagious.
30. Brand for those who might need to Really! I am not!” Husband #1 and I
plan a bris looked at each other.
31. View
And then the daughter of the woman
32. Seminary subj.
33. Letters for a savior? sitting shiva walked in and said, “Yes, my
34. Bro mom has the flu…I think I am going to
35. The Cyclones of the NCAA, for short put gloves on.” Umm, what to do. This
36. Where over 37,000 moved on up from poor woman just lost her brother, but
between 1948-1951
she sounds like she has tuberculosis.
37. One might say Calvin Klein
38. Corn site I looked at her and said, “Perhaps we
40. Tenn. neighbor should put some yellow caution tape
41. Beit follower up around your immediate periphery?”
42. Brown’s vines She laughed and said, “Oh no, you are
44. Warren Buffett, e.g.
going to write a column about this,
45. Name for 56-Across, once
46. Having one in New York this time of aren’t you?” “Would you like me to?”
year is unlikely I asked…and here we are. The daugh-
47. Doctrines ter was spraying Lysol, and a whole
49. Back in?
50. Wail
51. Bisect This week’s topic, inspired
52. Funny Faris
53. Jerusalem Biblical and Bronx by true events, might be
54. Kind of collar
57. First palindromic name, perhaps
a little delicate.The shiva
58. Single, e.g.
59. A Beatle bride
house. There is nothing
funny about that.
conversation about the potency of the
flu vaccine ensued.
Thank God I haven’t been on the
had in-depth conversations with people
who have, unfortunately, been in that
fortable with crowds are equally uncom-
fortable in a shiva situation, but they
have always said that they appreciate
a humorous reprieve. That, at times,
the conversation comes to a standstill,
whether it be because they aren’t famil-
iar with the people visiting them or it
has just been a very long day. Husband
#1 is much more comfortable paying
shiva calls than I am. Many years ago,
he saw that a man was sitting shiva in
a neighboring commu-
nity, a man he had been
roommates with when he
went to Keren B’Yavneh
(a school in Israel).
He felt that even though
he had not seen this man
in a while, he didn’t even
question going to pay a
shiva call. He got to the
house and went in to sit
down. He didn’t see his
friend, so he assumed
that the empty chair was
his. Someone came back into the room
and sat down in the empty chair. It was
not his friend. There was a person block-
ing husband #1’s view so he looked to
the person next to him and whispered,
“Where is so-and-so?” The visitor looked
at my poor husband #1 and said, “Um, he
is sitting right there.” Mr. So-and-So was
not my spouse’s roommate from Israel.
In fact, Mr. So-and-So was someone who
husband #1 had never seen before in his
life. As he sat hoping no one would start
talking to him, the man in front of him
got up to leave and husband #1 stood up
behind him and gracefully slipped out of
the room.
Does this kind of thing ever happen to
anyone else?
The moral of the story is, when in
doubt, do the right thing. Sometimes
you have to bring Tamiflu with you, and
sometimes you should really know who
you are going to see.
May 2019 only give us reasons to
celebrate….
Banji Ganchrow of Teaneck hopes no one
thinks this topic was in bad taste. If you
do, it was husband #1’s idea…

It’s award season:
The Golden Globes and SAG awards
N
BC is televising Golden Globe awards live
this year on Sunday, January 6, at 8 p.m.
Sandra Oh and ANDY SAMBERG, 40, will
host. Here’s a list of the confirmed Jewish
nominees and a number of Jews closely connected to
a nominated film or TV program. Globes are given for
excellence in film and TV. (As in my regular column,
a Jewish person’s name is in caps the first time it’s
mentioned here.)
Film categories
No Jewish thespians were nominated for a
leading actor or actress film role this year.
TIMOTHéE CHALAMET,, 22 (“Beautiful
Boy”), is up for the best supporting actor
Globe and RACHEL WEISZ, 48 (“The
Favourite”), is a best supporting film
actress nominee. Chalamet’s role was
based on the real-life NIC SHEFF, now
36, who long battled drug addiction. Weisz
played Lady Sarah Churchill, a historical fig-
ure who was involved in 18th-century royal
court intrigue.
MARK RONSON,, 43, is nominated for co-
writing a best song nominee: “Shallow” from “A
Star is Born.” JUSTIN HURWITZ,, 33 (“First Man”),
and MARC SHAIMAN,, 59 (“Mary Poppins Returns”),
are nominated for best original score. Hurwitz won
two Oscars in 2017 for best score and best song (“La
La Land”). Shaiman is best known for his score for the
musical version of “Hairspray.” As noted in a recent reg-
ular column, the new “Mary Poppins” remake includes
brief musical references to the mega-hit score of the
original 1964 “Poppins” film. RICHARD SHERMAN,
90, who wrote the ‘64 score with his late brother, ROB-
ERT,, consulted on the new “Poppins” film.
TV categories
Acting: SACHA BARON COHEN,, 47, (“Who is Amer-
ica?”) and MICHAEL DOUGLAS,, 74 (“The Kominsky
Method”), vie for the Globe for best actor in a comedy.
The varied characters Cohen plays frequently spoof
real-life politicians. Douglas stars as Sandy Kominsky,
an L.A. acting coach. Two Jewish actresses, ALISON
BRIE, 35 (“Glow”), and DEBRA MESSING, 50 (“Will
& Grace”), compete for best actress in a TV comedy.
ALAN ARKIN, 84, who plays Kominsky’s Jewish agent
and best friend in “The Kominsky Method,” is up for
best supporting actor; he competes with HENRY WIN-
KLER, 73 (“Barry”). ALEX BORSTEIN,, 47, who plays
Mrs. Maisel’s agent in “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel,” is
nominated for a best supporting actress Globe. Finally,
PATRICIA ARQUETTE,, 50 (“Escape at Dannemora”),
whose late mother was Jewish, is up for best actress in
a mini-series or TV movie.
“Best” awards: Film and TV
The Globes for best film and best TV show are given to
the movie or series’ principal producers, of whom there
are many. My practice is to note if a Jewish director or
writer/creator is associated with that film or TV program.
Two films nominated for best drama film were co-written
by Jews: “BlacKkKlansman” (CHARLIE WACHTEL and
Arts & Culture
DAVID RABINOWITZ, both 32), and “A Star is Born”
(ERIC ROTH, 73). Also: a best animated film nominee,
“Spider-Man: Into the Spider Verse,” was co-written by
RODNEY ROTHMAN, 45ish.
“The Americans,” created by JOE WEISBERG, 52, is up
for best TV series, drama. It competes with “Pose,” an FX
drama series that explores several New York City subcul-
tures as they existed in the 1980s. “Pose” was co-created
by BRAD FALCHUK
FALCHUK, 47. Another best drama nomi-
nee, the Amazon series “Homecoming,” was based on
a podcast written by ELI HOROWITZ, 41, and MICAH
BLOOMBERG
BLOOMBERG, 40ish. Horowitz and Bloomberg were
heavily involved in the creation of the TV series.
The best musical or comedy series nominees
include ““The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel,” co-created
by AMY SHERMAN PALLADINOPALLADINO, 52, and “The
Kominsky Method,” created by CHUCK LORRE,
66. The nominees for best miniseries or TV movie
include “A Very English Scandal,” a British series
shown on Amazon; it was directed by STEPHEN
FREARS
FREARS, 77, a Brit. “Scandal” competes with
“Escape at Dannemora,” which was directed
by BEN STILLER, 53, and co-written by
JERRY STAHL
STAHL, 64, and MICHAEL TOLKIN,
68. Stahl’s memoir about being a drug addict,
“Permanent Midnight,” was made into a
movie starring Stiller in 1999. Stahl credits
the making of that movie — and his commit-
ment to stay clean — with saving his life and
reviving his career.
Honorable mention: Adam Driver and
Rachel Brosnahan, who aren’t Jewish, are
nominated for playing Jewish characters.
Driver played a Jewish police officer in “Black
KkKlansman” and Brosnahan plays the Jewish Mrs.
Maisel in “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.”
25th annual Screen Actors’ Guild awards
TNT and TBS will present SAG awards live on Sunday,
January 27, at 8 p.m. (SAG awards are given for indi-
vidual and cast acting excellence in film and on TV.)
The lifetime achievement award will go to Alan Alda,
82. Alda’s wife of 61 years, ARLENE ALDA, 85, is Jew-
ish, and their three children were raised Jewish.
Film nominees: Rachel Weisz and Timothée Cha-
lament are nominated for best supporting actress and
actor in, respectively, “The Favourite” and “Beautiful
Boy.” Five films are nominated for the outstanding cast
award. Only one nominated film, “A Star is Born,” has
Jewish cast members: ANDREW DICE CLAY, 61, and
British Jewish actor RAFI GAVRON, 29.
TV nominees, individual awards: Best actress, mini-
series: Patricia Arquette (“Escape at Dannemora”); Best
actress, drama series: JULIA GARNER, 24 (“Ozark”);
Best actress, comedy series: Alex Borstein (“Mrs.
Maisel”) and Alison Brie (“Glow”); Best actor, comedy
series: Alan Arkin (“The Kominsky Method”), Michael
Douglas (“Kominsky”), and Henry Winkler (“Barry”).
Note: the Guild awards don’t include a best supporting
TV actor or TV actress award.
Five TV series are nominated for the outstanding cast
award. Two shows have Jewish cast members: (1)”The
Americans”: ANTHONY ARKIN, 51 (Adam’s son), and
NOAH EMMERICH, 53; (2) “Ozark”: Julia Garner, DAR-
REN GOLDSTEIN, 44, and JORDANA SPIRO, 41. Five TV
shows are nominated for outstanding cast, comedy. Four
have Jewish cast members: (1) “Barry”: Henry Winkler and
SARAH GOLDBERG, 32; (2) “GlowW”: Alison Brie, MARC
MARON, 55, and JACKIE TOHN, 38; (3) “The Kominsky
Method”: Alan Arkin and Michael Douglas; and (4) “Mrs
Maisel”: Alex Borstein, CAROLINE AARON, 66, KEVIN
POLLAK, 61, and MICHAEL ZEGEN, 39.
JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019 25
Calendar
Saturday  child, 7:30 p.m. Also
january 5
Shabbat in Emerson:
Congregation B’nai
Israel hosts a special
“Resolutions” Shabbat
service led by Rabbi
Debra Orenstein, with a
discussion connecting
the secular New Year
with the Jewish year,
10 a.m. 53 Palisade Ave.
(201) 265-2272 or www.
bisrael.com.
Sunday  (201)837-2795.
january 6
Brunch in Washington
Township: Temple Beth
El of Northern Valley in
Closter joins Temple Beth
Or for their first joint Kol
Dorot New Year’s brunch,
Marion Ettlinger
9:30 a.m. 56 Ridgewood
Road. (201) 664-7422.
Blood drive in
Englewood:
Congregation Ahavath
Torah holds a blood drive
The United
JAN. with New Jersey Blood
Services, a division of
Synagogue of
13
New York Blood Center,
Hoboken hosts a book
9 a.m.-3 p.m. 240 Broad
brunch about “Jewish Ave. (800) 933-2566 or
www.nybloodcenter.org.
Comedy: A Serious History”
with author/Columbia University
professor Jeremy Dauber, 10:30
a.m. 115 Park Ave. (201) 659-4000
or office@hobokensynagogue.org.
of the Philharmonic
Friday  Orchestra of the
Americas and the
January 4 David Levy
Chamber Orchestra of
New York, and pianist
James Rensink, at its
Breakfast in Tenafly:
Rabbi David Levy,
guest artist Shabbat. regional director of
The mini-concert is the American Jewish
at 6:30 p.m., followed Committee, discusses
by a wine, fruit, and “Anti-Semitism: The
cheese “pre-neg” at 7. Case for Global Jewish
The 7:30 service will
be led by Rabbi David
Advocacy,” for Temple
Sinai’s Brotherhood.
Widzer and Cantor Breakfast, 9:30 a.m.;
Elizabeth Goldmann. 221
program at 10. 1 Engle St.
Schraalenburgh Road. (201) 568-3035.
Benjamin Baron (201) 768-5112 or www.
tbenv.org. Workshop for expectant
Shabbat in Closter:
parents: The United
Temple Beth El of
Synagogue of Hoboken
Northern Valley
begins a two-part
welcomes Benjamin
Shalom Baby workshop
Baron, principal clarinet
26 Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019
on welcoming a Jewish
January 13. 115 Park Ave.
Friday  Sunday 
(201) 659-4000 or www. January 11 january 13
hobokensynagogue.org.
Shabbat in Teaneck:
Rescued family Rabbi Larry Rothwachs
Holocaust photos: of Congregation Beth
Jacob Wisse, the Aaron continues “Talking
director of Yeshiva in Shul” series for teens
University Museum, and adults with “Frum
presents “Lost & Found: a Distance: When
Adventures of a Family Family and Friends
Photo Album Rescued Leave Orthodoxy,”
from the Holocaust” 7:45 p.m. Series
at Congregation Rinat concludes February 1.
Yisrael, 8 p.m. 389 950 Queen Anne Road.
West Englewood Ave. (201) 836-6210 or www.
bethaaron.org.
Author/book signing in
Wyckoff: Local author
Tuesday  Saturday  Jenna Hammond reads W
january 8 january 12 and signs copies of her
new children’s book,
“Downward Mule,” for T
Program for seniors
in Closter: Hazak at Temple Beth Rishon’s c
Temple Emanu-El meets Activities Committee, t
noon. 585 Russell Ave. All
for a presentation by t
Dr. Lee Igel, a clinical welcome. (201) 891-4466
or www.bethrishon.org. t
associate professor at
NYU Tisch Institute for N
Global Sport, 11:30 a.m.
Jazz in Glen Rock: p
Morgan Treni and the
180 Piermont Road.
Landscapes performs
Julia, (201) 750-9997 or
jazz/funk/cabaret/and
vazquez@templeemanu-
rock at the Glen Rock
el.com.
Jewish Center, 4 p.m.
Y
Discussing Jeannette 682 Harristown Road.
Shabbat in Teaneck: (201) 652-6624 or
Rankin in New City: Temple Emeth’s adult office@grjc.org
Dumont historian Dick education committee
Burnon gives a video/ R
lecture, “Suffragist/
hosts a “One Book One
Community” Shabbaton a
Pacifist Jeannette Rankin
of Montana: The First
exploring the themes Singles B
of this year’s Jewish 2
Woman Elected to
Congress,” at the New
Federation of Northern
Sunday  b
New Jersey’s OBOC
City Jewish Center, 1:30 book selection, “Among january 6 i
p.m. 47 Old Schoolhouse
Road, New City, NY.
the Living,” a novel n
by Jonathan Rabb. Seniors meet in West a
Snow date January 15. 1666 Windsor Road. Nyack: Singles 65+
(845) 638-9600 or www.
newcityjc.org.
(201) 833-1322 or emeth. meets for a social bagels n
org. and lox brunch at the t
JCC Rockland, 11 a.m. All
Wednesday  Havdalah/bingo:
The JCC of Paramus/
are welcome, particularly
those from Hudson,
january 9 Congregation Beth Passaic, Bergen, or
Tikvah offers family Rockland counties. 450
Torah in Closter: Rabbi bingo hosted by its West Nyack Road. Gene,
David-Seth Kirshner Association of Parents (845) 356-5525.
discusses “Mikveh: and Teachers, with
Demystifying an Ancient
Ritual,” at Temple
prizes, snacks, and
make-your-own sundaes,
M
Emanu-El of Closter, beginning with Havdalah,
9 a.m. Light breakfast. 7 p.m. East 304 Midland
R
180 Piermont Road. Ave. (201) 262-7691, m
(201) 750-9997, or www. julieleopold@yahoo.com, E
templeemanuel.com/ or www.jccparamus.org.
livingtorah.
s
 Calendar

Beyond BDS discussion Heart health in Englewood and Tenafly

in Woodcliff Lake The Kaplen JCC on the Palisades of
Temple Emanuel of the Pascack Valley and AIPIAC are co- Tenafly and Englewood Health offer
sponsoring a discussion for high school and college students the Wellness and Longevity Heart
and adults, “Beyond BDS: The Purpose of the Campus Pro- Health Program, aimed at people
Israel Movement,” on Wednesday January 9, at 7 p.m. Speak- with heart disease or who have such
ers include a student activist, Jonathan Levin, a student at risk factors for heart disease as diabe-
Lehigh University whose family belongs to Temple Emanuel, tes, high blood pressure, and a family
and Adam Teitelbaum, AIPAC’s leadership development history of heart disease; as well as for
director. Jonathan Levin people who are overweight or have
Registration is required. To register, email Logan Tessler at completed a formal cardiac rehab
LTessler@aipac.org, call (347) 778-7735, or go to www.aipac. program. The structured five-week
org/bergenaipaconcampus. program, led by medical and fitness
The shul is at 87 Overlook Drive. experts, aims to lead participants into
a well-rounded, healthy life style. Phy-
sician clearance is required. A JCC trainer leads a class in the Heart
The introductory session will be on Health program.  Courtesy Englewood Health
Thursday, January 10, from 6 to 7 p.m.,
Westchester Schechter open house at the Graf Center for Integrative Medicine in total. Participants will have access to
in Englewood Health. The session will give the JCC gym at no additional charge. Fit-
The Solomon Schechter School of West- offers state-of-the-art engineering and a program overview and participants will ness staff will be available to help with per-
chester holds a parlor meeting to give entrepreneurship programs, athletics, hear tips from experts in cardiology, nutri- sonal workouts at the JCC and participants
the Rockland community the oppor- and arts activities, as well as great col- tion, and other services. Baselines will be will receive a free JCC membership for one
tunity to learn about the school and lege placement. For reservations, email taken if requested. Doctor clearance forms month.
the community at a private home in Jackie Grosser at Swadmissions@Schech- should be submitted by January 10. A final wrap-up session will be held on
New City on Monday, January 14, at 8 terWestchester.org, or go to www. Group fitness classes led by certified Monday, February 11, from 6 to 7 p.m., at
p.m. The upper school, in Hartsdale, schechterwestchester.org. trainers will be held at the fitness center at the Graf Center for Integrative Medicine.
the Kaplen JCC on the Palisades on Mondays Baselines will be taken if requested.
and Thursdays at 6 p.m. The class will be tai- The cost for the entire program is $100.
lored to the participants’ individual needs. For more information or to register, call
The time commitment is 50 minutes (201) 608-2377 or go to www.Englewood-
Yeshiva week concert in Florida twice a week for five weeks, for 10 sessions Health.org/HHP.

Renowned cantors Yaakov Motzen

and Benzion Miller perform at a Tu
B’shvat concert on Sunday, January

SOLÈNE
20, at 7 p.m., at the Shul of Bal Har-
bour in Surfside, Fla. The concert
is organized by Project Yeshuah, a
nonprofit group that gives financial
and career advice to Jewish commu-
nities in Florida. For information, go
to www.yeshuah.org.
Cantor Yaakov Cantor Benzion IS HAVING A HUGE

SALE
Motzen Miller

Monday nights are for dancing • Hats

Rabbi Lisa Vernon leads weekly Israeli dancing for beginners and intermediates on
many Monday evenings beginning January 7 through March 25, at 8 p.m. at Temple • Make-Up
Emanuel of the Pascack Valley in Woodcliff Lake.
Refreshments will be served. For information, call (201) 391- 0801 or email Jill Stras-
sberg at jillcubed@yahoo.com.
• Scarves
AND MORE

Announce your events 50%-80% OFF

We welcome announcements of upcoming events. Announcements Saturday, January 12th · 7pm-11pm
are free. Accompanying photos must be high resolution, jpg files. Sunday, January 13th · 10am-5pm
Send announcements 2 to 3 weeks in advance. Not every release
will be published. Include a daytime telephone number and send to: 1438 Queen Anne Road · Teaneck
pr@jewishmediagroup.com • 201-837-8818 x 110 201-530-7401
@soleneboutique

Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 27

Jewish World

Amos Oz, a ‘saintly intellectual’

who turned Israel’s national reality into art
ANDREW SILOW-CARROLL

Amos Oz often would speak in the kind of tossed-off

epigrams that come only with a lot of practice. But just
when you wanted to smack him for his breezy erudition,
he would redeem himself with a flash of spot-on — and
hilarious — self-awareness.
In 2011, speaking at the 92nd Street Y in Manhattan
about the novel he’d just published in English, “Scenes
From Village Life,” Oz said that 99 percent of the typi-
cal media coverage of Israel involves extremist settlers,
ultra-Orthodox fanatics and brutal soldiers, “and 1 per-
cent saintly intellectuals like myself.”
Oz died last Friday at 79, having won nearly every lit-
erary prize short of the Nobel and having become per-
haps Israel’s most widely translated author. If Jews were
in the canonization business, Oz would have earned his
wings (halo? robe? my theology is shaky) on the basis
of “A Tale of Love and Darkness,” his 2002 novel-cum-
memoir. Like so much of what he wrote, the book is not
just autobiographical, but a biography of Israel itself.
Although his story ends before he is out of his teens, the
young Amos bears witness to the destruction of Euro-
pean Jewry, the height of the British mandate, a Hebrew
renaissance in Jerusalem, the great Zionist debates (and
debaters) of the day, the rise of the kibbutz movement,
and the birth of the state.
The book’s brilliance is its blurring of personal mem- Amos Oz, shown here in 2015, often blurred the personal and the political in his writing. JASON KEMPIN/GETTY IMAGES

oir and national drama, as in an unforgettable descrip-

tion of the night in 1947 when the United Nations voted
to partition Mandatory Palestine, giving international
legitimacy to a Jewish state. His father, Yehuda Klausner,
still “drenched in sweat from the crush of the crowds”
celebrating the U.N. vote, crawls into bed with the young
narrator. He tells the boy of the “hooligans” who tor-
mented him and his brother back in Odessa and Vilna,
and how the bullies forced the boy’s grandfather “down
on the paving stones and removed his trousers too in the
middle of the playground.”
Oz continues:
“And still in a voice of darkness with his hand still los-
ing its way in my hair (because he was not used to strok-
ing me) my father told me under my blanket in the early
hours of November 30, 1947, ‘Bullies may well bother
you in the street or at school some day. They may do it
“It is only when the bridge collapses that the story
begins,” he said.
Oz also would distinguish Israel from other countries
in the way it came into being: Other countries were born
out of geography, history, politics, or demography, he’d
say. Unfortunately for Israel, it was born out of a dream.
“The only way to keep a dream intact is never to live it
out,” he said. “Israel is a dream come true, and therefore
it is disappointing.”
Inevitably with Oz, Israel’s left-wing conscience as
well as perhaps its greatest writer of fiction, there was
the temptation to read politics into his prose.
“There are political overtones,” he would acknowl-
edge when asked whether this character or that set-
ting was meant to be a stand-in for one Israeli crisis or
another. When he tried to deny such meanings, he said,
“I am wasting my time. People will see it as an allegory.”
Oz died at a time when so many of the things he stood
for — a vital Israeli left, a robust peace process, a vision
for sharing the land — are in retreat, if not dead and bur-
ied. But even until the end, he never gave up trying. His
latest book, “Dear Zealots: Letters from a Divided Land,”
published last month in English, contained essays on the
rise of zealotry in Israel and around the world.
Discussing it with the Washington Post, Oz insisted
that neither he nor the book was pessimistic. And in
doing so, he seemed to be passing a baton.
“Politically speaking, I have been engaged and involved
in writing articles, making speeches for 60 years,” he said.
“Now it is my time, not to retire but to provide my ammuni-
tion, my experience to the younger generation and let them
take it from here.” JTA WIRE SERVICE

precisely because you are a bit like me. But from now
on, from the moment we have our own state, you will
never be bullied just because you are a Jew and because
Jews are so-and-sos. Not that. Never again. From tonight
that’s finished here. Forever.’”
In his 92Y talk, Oz explained that the book was neither
a memoir nor a novel, but in fact a “tale,” a designation
that unfortunately has no category in the Library of Con-
gress. Instead, “A Tale of Love and Darkness” combines
Oz’s strengths as both a novelist and a writer of impas-
sioned political nonfiction — as he often would put it, he
had two pens on his desk, “one pen to tell stories and
another pen to tell the government to go to hell.”
If quips like that sound rehearsed — well, considering
his body of work, Oz earned a pass. And anyway, you can’t
plagiarize yourself. And what quips they were! Asked why
so many of his stories seemed so downbeat, he would
reply, “If I were to sum up my books in one word, I would
say they are about ‘families.’ If you gave me two words, I
would say ‘unhappy families.’” Explaining what makes for
a good story, Oz would say that a bridge that carries thou-
sands of cars each day is no story at all.
Armenia’s capital honors Holocaust survivor
who coined the term ‘genocide’
CNAAN LIPHSHIZ
Armenia’s capital named a street for Raphael Lemkin,
the Jewish lawyer who coined the term genocide.
The deputy mayor of Yerevan, Sergey Harutu-
nyan, said during the ceremony last month that
Lemkin’s legacy had a “serious impact” on world
history, the Armenrpess agency reported from the
Dec. 11 ceremony.
Lemkin was born in what is today Belarus to a
Polish-Jewish family. He fled the Nazis in 1941 to the
United States.
As a jurist, he helped draft the 1948 United
Nations Convention on the Prevention and
Punishment of the Crime of Genocide, for which
he had campaigned for years.
The slaughter of thousands of Armenian civilians
by Turkish troops during World War I had an early
and powerful influence on Lemkin, who was born in
1900. Upon studying it, he wrote, “my worries about
the murder of the innocent became more meaning-
ful to me. I didn’t know all the answers but I felt that
a law against this type of racial or religious murder
must be adopted by the world.”
Lemkin was fluent in nine languages and was able
to read 14. His first published book was a 1926 trans-
lation of the Chaim Nachman Bialik novella “Noach
and Marynka” from Hebrew into Polish.

28 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019


Albert Burstein
Albert Burstein of Tenafly, 96, died December 27.
A World War II veteran, he earned a Bronze Star from
the U.S., and the Chevalier of the Legion of Honor from
France. He graduated Columbia Law School and was
a lawyer in Jersey City, NJ 37th District Assemblyman,
Democratic Majority Leader, and chair of New Jersey
Law Revision and the Election Law Enforcement
commissions. He was a founding partner of the
Hackensack law firm Herten Burstein, which merged
with the firm Archer & Greiner, where he worked until
this year.
He is survived by his wife of 68 years, Ruth; children,
Jeffrey (Kim Constantine), Diane Angel ( Jim), and Laura;
a brother, David ( Jackie); three grandchildren; cousins,
nephews, and nieces.
Arrangements were by Gutterman and Musicant
Jewish Funeral Directors.
Morton Dosik
Morton Dosik, 88, of Woodcliff Lake, died December 28.
A New York University graduate, he owned Morton
Books in Manhattan
Preceded in death by a sister, Clara, and his wife of
39 years, Sherry; he is survived by children Jill, and
Jonathan (Tara); a sister, Brenda, and grandchildren,
Spencer and Jack.
Arrangements were by Robert Schoem’s Menorah
Chapel, Paramus.
Ruth Hoffman
Ruth Hoffman, née Ostrofsky, 88, of Englewood Cliffs,
formelry of Brooklyn, died December 28.
She received bachelor’s and master’s degrees from
Brooklyn College, taught in New York City and New
Jersey public schools, and was a corporate administrator
at Eastern Meats. Predeceased by her husband, Irving,
and a son, Brian, she is survived by sons, David (Tamara)
and Steve; daughter-in-law Jennifer; and grandchildren,
Marlena, Jessica, AJ, and Zachary.
Arrangements were by Gutterman and Musicant
Jewish Funeral Directors.
Dr. Ernest Landi
Dr. Ernest Landi of Fort Lee died December 22.
A chiropractor, his career spanned five decades in the
Rockland County area, and he partnered with his son,
Dr. Eric Landi, five years ago.
He is survived by his wife Brenda; children, Adam,
Eric, and Jill; and grandchildren, Jake and Emma.
Arrangements were by Robert Schoem’s Menorah
Chapel, Paramus.
Obituaries
Mark Chernichaw Obituaries are prepared with
information provided by funeral homes.
Mark Chernichaw, 72, of Englewood Cliffs, formerly of
Correcting errors is the responsibility
Teaneck, died December 22, 2018 after a long illness.
of the funeral home.
Born in Newark, New Jersey, he was an executive
at the Home Shopping Network in St. Petersburg,
Florida, a tenured Associate Professor of Film and
Television at New York University, and a retired Vice
President of Global Communications for Prudential.
Mark is survived by his wife Pauline, two sons
Adam (Jennifer) of Connecticut, Ian (Deborah) of
New Jersey, Limor Gafni Chernichaw of New Jersey; Funeral Planning Simplified
and seven grandchildren, Elli, Amit, Eric, Ethan,
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Contributions can be sent to the Alzheimer’s
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Association.
Arrangements were by Gutterman Musicant, Owner/Manager Daniel W. Leber, NJ Lic. No3186
Hackensack, New Jersey.
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Melvin (Mona), and Jerome; and grandchildren, Billy,
Brian, Kimberly, Carleigh, and Zachary.
Donations can be made to the Jewish National Fund.
Arrangements were by Louis Suburban Chapel, Fair Lawn.
Linda Scheer
Linda Scheer, née Albert, 74, of Leonardo, formerly of
Jersey City, died December 24 in Holmdel.
She was a member of Liberty Benevolent Society of
Liberty Lodge Knights of Pythias, Jersey City.
Predeceased by her husband, Philip, she is survived by
children, Scott, Melissa, and Heidi Beth.
Arrangements were by Eden Memorial Chapels,
Fort Lee.
Claire Schorr
Claire Schorr, née Ginsberg, 96, of Teaneck, formerly of
Paterson, died December 31.
She was a business education teacher at Pompton
Lakes and Eastside high schools, a member of the Retired
New Jersey Teachers Association, and a life member of We continue to be Jewish family managed,
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in Tenafly. at the Funeral Home or in Your Own Home
He was predeceased by his wife, Rochelle, in 2006.
Arrangements were by Eden Memorial Chapels, Fort Lee. GuttermanMusicantWien.com
Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 29
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Jewish World

The New York Times says a Palestinian

medic’s death in Gaza could be a war crime
ANDREW SILOW-CARROLL

T
he New York Times devoted
much of its front page and three
inside pages Sunday to a recon-
struction of the circumstances
surrounding the June death of a Palestin-
ian medic during riots at the Israeli fence
with Gaza.
The newspaper concludes that the
shooting of 20-year-old Rouzan al-Najjar
by an Israeli soldier “appears to have been
reckless at best, and possibly a war crime,
for which no one has yet been punished.”
The investigation is already making
waves — among those who objected to Isra-
el’s use of deadly force to quell the rioting
at the border fence and those who charge
The Times with a pattern of bias directed
at Israel.

How was the piece reported?

David M. Halbfinger, the paper’s Jerusalem
bureau chief, is given the byline on a story
that he and six colleagues reported. The
Times says it analyzed more than 1,000
photos and videos taken by photogra-
phers, protesters, bystanders and med-
ics during the June 1 riot, and interviewed
more than 30 witnesses. The research
agency Forensic Architecture, which has Palestinian protesters during clashes with Israeli security forces on the Gaza-Israeli border, September 14, 2018.
also worked with the Israeli human rights  MAJDI FATHI/NURPHOTO VIA GETTY IMAGES

group B’Tselem to investigate allegations

of Israeli military abuses, helped create
a 3-D model of the scene. Interviewees
included Gaza health officials and Israeli
military officials.
Who is Rouzan al-Najjar?
The article describes the young medic as
a “charismatic and committed” Gaza resi-
dent who was “largely self-taught” in first
aid and “lied about her lack of education.
She was a feminist, by Gaza standards,
shattering traditional gender rules, but
also a daughter who doted on her father,
was particular about her appearance and
was slowly assembling a trousseau.”
The Times also says that she frequently
joked with her friends about becoming a
martyr, and kept returning to the scene of
the deadly confrontations over the warn-
ings of friends and family.
How did she die?
The fatal shot came at 6:31 p.m. from the
Israeli side of the fence, 120 yards away,
following a day of rioting that seemed to
be winding down. Najjar was standing
amid a group of protesters and medics
who were treating others for the effects
of tear gas when she was shot in the chest
and died within minutes. The Times says
its reconstruction confirmed that a single
bullet hit the ground, fragmented, and
managed to strike three medics, includ-
ing Najjar.
Why do they say it might be a
war crime?
Israel acknowledges that it uses live fire at
the Gaza fence confrontations, especially
for those hurling projectiles like rocks or
Molotov cocktails, or attempting to breach
the fence, but aims at the ground or pro-
testers’ lower extremities to lower the risk
of deadly casualties. It also says it treats
unarmed and armed Hamas operatives as
a violent threat.
The army told The Times that it was
targeting a man in a yellow shirt who was
throwing stones and pulling at the fence,
but The Times claims the only man fitting
that description was about 120 yards from
the fence and posed no threat. The news-
paper quotes “former Israeli and Ameri-
can snipers” saying it would be reckless
and possibly a war crime if anyone who
was not a legitimate target could be put
at risk.
“The laws of war would not want any
military personnel to deliberately fire
in the direction of the medics,” explains
Ryan Goodman, a law professor at New
York University who was a special counsel
to the Pentagon on war crimes. “I’m not
saying it’s close to the line. I’m saying it
crosses the line.”
How has Israel responded?
In addition to saying that it was target-
ing the man in the yellow shirt, the army
insists that its soldiers were following the
rules of engagement that snipers may
shoot only at people posing a violent
threat. Lt. Col. Jonathan Conricus said that
Najjar’s killing was unintended.
“She was not the target,” Conricus says.
“None of the medical personnel are ever
a target.”
The article reports that 185 Palestinians
have died in rioting at the border fence
that began in late March. It cites a senior
Israeli commander who told The Times in
August that 60 to 70 other Gaza protesters
had been killed unintentionally, around
half the total killed at that point.
In addition, “Israeli military lawyers
conceded there had been some miscon-
duct but said that no soldiers were sus-
pected of intentionally killing anyone they
knew they shouldn’t have.”
What are the critics saying?
Ira Stoll, who runs a website that cri-
tiques The Times, says the article is one-
sided in its description of the Israeli-Gazan
conflict, using “language to exculpate Pal-
estinian Arab terrorism” — for example,
by describing rockets from Gaza in the
passive voice without noting that they are
aimed at Israeli civilians by Hamas opera-
tives. He asks why the paper devoted so
many resources to the death of the Pal-
estinian medic but has so far ignored the
murder of Ari Fuld, an Israeli American
who was killed in September by a Palestin-
ian terrorist in a stabbing attack near his
hometown of Efrat.
“The New York Times’ investigation, for
all its dignified trappings, is just the same
old Israel-bashing you can get for free on
any extreme right or extreme left Internet
site or social media feed,” Stoll writes in
the Algemeiner.
Seth Mandel, executive editor of the
Washington Examiner, says the article was
“sickening” in the way it downplayed the
violence of the Palestinian rioters.
By contrast, Oded Shalom, a columnist
for the Israeli news site Ynet, admires
the legwork that the Times put into
the article.
“As an Israeli journalist I can only envy
the thorough work of Halbfinger and his
colleagues,” he writes. “Having the time
and resources for such investigative work
should not be taken for granted. While
the Gaza Strip remains closed to Israeli
journalists — on the orders of the Israeli
security forces — the foreign media is
free to enter. Us Israeli journalists have
to rely on announcements from the IDF
spokesperson, and have no way of prop-
erly cross-referencing information. That
isn’t journalism at its best, even though
some of us have sources across the bor-
der and can ask for comments, or verify
some details.”
 JTA WIRE SERVICE

32 JEWISH STANDARD JANUARY 4, 2019


Gift will benefit Englewood Health’s new outpatient program
The Englewood Health Foundation is the recipient of a lead-
ership gift set to benefit Englewood Health’s new outpatient
behavioral health program. The Gregory P. Shadek Behav-
ioral Care Center is named in honor of Gregory Shadek, son
of Laurence and Patricia Shadek of Alpine.
“The issue of mental health is real, and the effects it can
have on a family and the community are far-reaching. We
are proud to support Englewood Health and the many
patients that it serves,” Laurence and Patricia Shadek said.
The Gregory P. Shadek Behavioral Care Center — with
the primary location at 25 Rockwood Place in Englewood
— features a dedicated care team of psychiatrists, licensed
clinical social workers, an addiction specialist, and other
health care professionals. Collaborating with existing non-
profit and governmental agencies, the team will develop an
education/prevention program rooted in promoting healthy
lifestyles for children and adults living in the community.
Such programs will help to address the opioid epidemic,
Technology meets philanthropy
in Israeli social-tech hub
New National Service track
gives young Israelis and foreign
volunteers the tools to invent
technological solutions for specific
societal challenges
Israel21c staff
If Deborah Wolhandler had enlisted in the Israeli military
she may well have been picked for an elite tech squad
such as the renowned 8200 signal intelligence unit where
many founders of Israel’s most successful businesses cut
their teeth.
But like many young Israelis — as many as 50 percent of
the target age group — excused from mandatory service
for religious, physical, or psychological reasons, Wolhan-
dler chose the non-mandatory alternative of National Ser-
vice (Sherut Leumi).
A new National Service branch, Carmel 6000, gives
her the opportunity to make a social impact through
technology.
“I always wanted to serve my country in a way that uses
my skills,” Wolhander, 22, says.
Her Carmel 6000 team is creating a photo database of
Jerusalem landmark or heritage site signs. They will add
features enabling anyone, including those with disabili-
ties, to access information about the sites and perhaps
link to related tours.
Wolhandler discovered Carmel 6000 online last March,
before completing her bachelor’s degree in computer
engineering at the Technion-Israel Institute of Technology.
“The idea of Carmel 6000 is to position Israel as a sig-
nificant player in the social-tech world similar to where
we are in cyber.”
Most of the other participants are fresh out of high
school, like Tom Rimok, 18. Her team is developing Tele-
buzz, a smartwatch that transfers spoken messages to text
using very high frequencies. “It works offline so it doesn’t
matter where you are,” she says.
The idea for Telebuzz came from a Jerusalem school for
children with hearing disabilities. All Carmel 6000 proj-
ects fill needs articulated by clients, mainly organizations
working on behalf of disadvantaged populations.
with community training in the use of Narcan, stigma-free
initiatives, and mental health first aid training programs.
“There is great need for access to behavioral health ser-
vices in our communities, and Englewood Health is ready to
answer the call,” said Warren Geller, president and CEO of
Englewood Health. “Through this new outpatient program
and thanks to the generosity of the Shadeks, our patients
and community will benefit from a stronger clinical team
and improved access to services and resources for those
struggling with mental health issues.”
According to the National Institute of Mental Health,
nearly one in five U.S. adults lives with a mental illness. As
such, and to no surprise, a recent community health needs
assessment of Bergen County, completed by a consortium
of local hospitals, revealed mental health as one of the top
health needs in the community.
“Access and affordability are very common hurdles for
patients seeking behavioral health services,” says Kathleen
Another of the 18 current projects is an awareness cam-
paign for Access Israel that has Israeli high school students
mapping dining and leisure venues that are accessible to
people with physical limitations. The data will be turned
over to Google to add to Google Maps.
“The core of National Service is to do something for
the welfare of society,” Carmel 6000 cofounder Yossi
Tsuria says.
“The idea of Carmel 6000 is to position Israel as a sig-
nificant player in the social-tech world similar to where we
are in cyber. We need to grow a generation of people that
can lead this revolution.”
Product expert and ed-tech innovator Michal Ophir
heads Carmel 6000’s user experience (UX) department.
She asked to join Tsuria’s initiative at the pilot stage, even
though there was no budget to pay her yet, because she
strongly believed in the concept.
“You can work in high-tech and make a lot of money,
but at the end of the day what did you do for the world?”
Ophir asks. “Can you say you changed something?”
Foreign volunteers welcome
Tsuria, a high-tech entrepreneur, was a cofounder of
Jerusalem-based NDS. When NDS was acquired by Cisco
in 2012, Tsuria became executive adviser to Cisco.
Last year, he quit his job to put his experience to use in
the social sphere.
Carmel 6000 began in the 2017-18 academic year as
a pilot program with two top female graduates of high
schools in the AMIT educational network. Among their
projects were reverse sensors for electric wheelchairs and
a system enabling home treatment for people with cogni-
tive issues.
The Carmel 6000 Development Center is based at the
Jerusalem headquarters of Synamedia (formerly Cisco).
Volunteer mentors and lecturers come from Synamedia
and other nearby firms including Intel, Matrix, L&T, and
OrCam, as well as from Hebrew University and the Jerusa-
lem College of Technology.
So far, all Carmel 6000 volunteers are women from
the national-religious sector with outstanding aptitude in
math, physics, and English. The first male applicant has
been accepted for the two-year program’s next cohort.
See Technology page 34
 Real Estate & Business
Kaminsky, senior vice president patient care services and
chief nursing officer at Englewood Health. “Our new outpa-
tient program will help patients access a network of services
and establish a continuum of care. Ongoing education, guid-
ance and support are key to improved mental health and we
want to lead in the delivery of this care.”
The Englewood Health Foundation raises funds to ben-
efit Englewood Health. A $50 million capital campaign
came to a successful close earlier this year. “Philanthropy
is becoming increasingly important for many nonprofit
organizations, including healthcare systems like Engle-
wood Health,” said Debra Albanese, executive vice presi-
dent of the Englewood Health Foundation. “Healthcare is
a round-the-clock commitment and with every new turn,
we find better ways to deliver services to our patients.
Each investment made translates to new opportunities,
and we are grateful to benefactors like Laurence and Patri-
cia for their foresight and commitment.”
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Real Estate & Business/Local 
Technology
FrOM page 33
Tsuria says successful applicants must
be passionate self-starters: “People who
become legendary in high-tech are not
afraid to try new things.”
A short version of Carmel 6000 is open
to overseas youth in cooperation with the
diaspora Affairs Ministry. A group of these
volunteers last summer created a device
enabling kids with hand mobility limitations
to spin a Chanukah dreidel at Beit Issie Sha-
pira’s holiday party for young clients and
their siblings.
Looking ahead, Tsuria plans a Tikun
Olam Technology Think Tank (T4), where
an international group of creative and tech-
nological minds will brainstorm about prob-
lems and social-tech solutions that can be
made at Carmel 6000.
“In some cases, after market research, we
will conclude that there is a global need for
some of our solutions. In order to globalize
our work, we will need to produce the solu-
tion, customize it, provide global support,
and so on,” says Tsuria. “Our objectives at
that stage will be met by creating startups
around the solutions and IP. This will be
achieved in our Carmel 6000 Accelerator.”
“In the first two years, we intend to
produce more than 25 projects, have 60
full-time National Service volunteers, and
expose the program to hundreds of young
people from the US and other countries
who will take active part in the develop-
ment of ideas, solutions and products,”
says Tsuria.
“Longer term, we expect to see a world-
leading ecosystem of startups and activi-
ties in this domain around the center in
Jerusalem.”
Tsuria points out that unlike social-tech
hackathons held in Israel, Carmel 6000
can provide ongoing tech support for its
inventions.
Clients that already have a working rela-
tionship with the program also include Yad
Vashem World Holocaust Remembrance
Center, ALYN pediatric rehab hospital,
ALEH residential network for children with
multiple severe disabilities and Alut-the
Jimmy
the Junk Man
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34 Jewish standard JanUarY 4, 2019
Israeli Society for Children and Adults with
Autism.
Avital Bayer, head of international rela-
tions for Carmel 6000, recruits private
donors for specific projects and organizes
delegations from other countries interested
in replicating the program.
She’s hosted visitors from Zambia, Aus-
tralia and London. American Ivy League
students and alumni are coming next, eager
to learn how to combine technology and
philanthropy.
The London Stock Exchange chose Car-
mel 6000 as its highlighted charitable part-
ner for its recent third annual Capital Mar-
kets Conference in Israel.
“In January, the London Stock Exchange
is launching the Jewish Women Business
Network and they invited to me speak on
a panel about what we’re doing here at Car-
mel 6000,” says Bayer, formerly interna-
tional liaison at the Israeli Embassy in Lon-
don’s Trade and Economic Division.
After two years at Carmel 6000, alumni
will enter the job market as experienced
programmers.
“No matter what career I decide on, what
I am learning at Carmel 6000 will help me,”
Wolhandler says, noting that teamwork,
planning and project organization are
among the universal skills she’s gaining. She
is also taking master’s courses at Hebrew
University in natural language processing
and computer vision.
Israel’s Ministry of Education, Ministry
of Diaspora Affairs, Authority for Civil Ser-
vice, AMIT and the Jerusalem Development
Authority support the initiative together
with investors including PICO Partners.
Within a few years, Tsuria expects to break
even by charging for projects and commer-
cializing IP.
The name Carmel 6000 combines a
Hebrew acronym for “willpower, brain and
heart” with 6000, the Jewish calendar year
that Talmudic and Kabbalistic scholars pre-
dicted the world as we know it would end
— either well or badly. The current Jewish
year is 5779.
“Our National Service volunteers have the
next 221 years to make sure it goes the way
we want,” explains Bayer. Israel21c.OrG
WE
More than 411,000 likes. • Att
De
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1- 6
We
Yarchei Kallah participants make Havdalah as Shabbat draws to its close.
So happy!
FrOM page 6
“I’ve been never been so happy to be
so exhausted.”
New Jersey NCSY Metro West adviser
Barak Bader, a student at Yeshiva Uni-
versity, said this year’s Yarchei Kallah
attracted the largest-ever contingent of
New Jersey NCSY members. There were
more than 40.
“You see all these kids coming
together with international peers
and realizing they are not alone,” Mr.
Bader said.
The themed focus on Moses, he
added, conveyed the message that
the man who led the Israelites out of
hockey
FrOM page 7
Jew playing at the highest level.” He
appreciates that the hockey team
respected his restrictions. “I told them
before the season when I couldn’t
play. They understood that. They were
respectful of my religious needs.”
The teen’s first trip to Israel took
place in 2017, when he was asked
to play in the Maccabiah. “I was at
camp, at Morasha,” in Pennsylvania,
J
J
“when I got the invitation,” he said.
im
im
“It’s like the Olympics for Jews. The
whole family went for three and a half
weeks. It was amazing.” Winning the
gold medal was memorable as well. So
too were the people he met. “I met a
bunch of people from the East Coast
RESIDEN
facebook.com/jewishstandard
do not
R
Egyptian bondage and brought them
the Torah at Mount Sinai — accom-
plished with much personal and com-
munal hardship — “didn’t just look at
his situation but took action and took
a stand for what he believed in and
changed the world.
“These teens all have that ability to
change lives and change themselves.”
Mr. Bader emphasized that Yar-
chei Kallah is not meant as a one-off
event. “It was a way for the advisors
to become closer with the teens and
encourage them to be involved in JSU
clubs in their schools,” he said. “I’m
planning to make sure they know it’s
not just a single moment of inspiration.
People care about them.”
and California,” he said. “I still keep
in touch with some of them, especially
on the East Coast.”
And while Noah did not mention it,
according to an article in a local news-
paper at the time, he was “the young-
est athlete selected among hundreds
across the U.S. to play ice hockey in the
2017 Maccabi Games in Israel.”
It’s clear from Noah’s experience that
learning goes both ways. “At home,
I learned to always stay humble,” he
said. “From hockey, I learned to keep
on trying.” Both lessons have been
invaluable. He also has learned how to
balance the various parts of his life. He
would tell other students, “Don’t do
what you don’t want to do, what you’re
the
the
doing but not enjoying.
“Make your own decision.”
trans
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www.MironProperties.com Jewish Standard JANUARY 4, 2019 35