Everything Is Fair, In Love And War; Agree or Disagree

I disagree to the statement that” Everything Is Fair, In Love And War”. This statement
implies that using unfair means in love or war is not unethical. Well, people cheat each other
for the want of money, love, woman, friendship, power etc. But they never give a thought
that things achieved or secured using foul play never gives true feeling of belonging, at least
according to me.

Any relationship made on the foundation of lies, cheating, temptation and power misuse, can
never be trusted. Thousands of examples support this argument. Such kind of thinking,
behaviour and status is always a binding factor for long relationship. People think that all is
fair in love and war. If we consider this proverb it simply indicate that even use of unfair
means to achieve your goals is justified under the circumstances similar to those under love
and war conditions

In love, unfair means may include cheating, betrayal, use of muscle or money power,
knavery, spreading hatred towards a particular person. Similarly, under war like situation,
unfair means may include cheating, non-observance of common applicable rules, fraud,
rumour mongering etc. Under situations of conflict, or love and war, people do not want to
apply the rules of fair play. People take all the freedom in using proverb to justify cheating.
Scope of the proverb has been conveniently broadened by opportunists to include politics,
business, games, and to attain success in any field in addition to love and war for which
proverb was originally used. Torture, murder, kidnapping, theft, money extortion, stalking are
never the acts of fairness. Nothing makes these acts fair. Hence this adage fall out of usage
and used by mean minded persons to justify unfair acts.

If we Just think about a situation that, if a boy is in love, than he can do anything for his
lover, and the girl also can do anything for him, but if this is one-sided love than, it will be a
big problem. Similarly in war like situations, first of all we have to avoid all these unfair
means and if it is necessary than we don't have to do so much of destruction of our enemy,
we can do all these things in a limited way.
Now I can defend my disagreement with the statement “Everything Is Fair, In Love And
War” with ethical theories also. According to the theory Egoism, we will be considered right
if we promote self interest for long term. Now, when we follow unfair means in love and war,
it has been arguably proved that, we get benefited for short term period but not for long term.
Suppose, a person lies to his/her lover in order to maintain his/her relationship. Though it will
help him/her for the short term but ultimately when the other person finds out about the lie
the relationship will not stand. So, the unfair mean is not helping to maintain a long term
relationship. Even in the case of a war, a country may win a war by adopting unfair means
but ultimately other countries will know about this fact and they will be unwilling to help
them or make any kind of trade with them or may become reluctant make any kind of
agreement with them, in future, because of lack of trust.

Even in the case of relativism it is said that right from wrong depends on social touching and
society will never defend the unfair means. According to religion also, unfair means is never
supported.According to the model deontology, some of the rules are; don’t cheat, don’t cause
pain, keep promise, obey law, do duty etc. These rules are clearly against the statement
‘Everything Is Fair In Love And War”

So, from a general viewpoint or ethical theories or ethical viewpoint, I clearly disagree to the
statement” Everything Is Fair, In Love And War”.