Dear Ms.

Manley,

For the final essay, the revisions that I made were those to change the PoV. I thought that

changing the PoV from a student to a parent would be really eye opening and would be able to

add validity to the argument. I feel as if so many people these days, especially parents, don’t take

stress that teenagers face nowadays as a legitimate issue. I decided to revise this essay in

particular because I had much more to say on the matter than what I included in the original.

From talking to my parents over the course of this year, which has been one of my most stressful

yet, I have learned a lot about their opinions and views on topics and their issues that I talk about

in the paper like homework and the current grading system. My parents have always been people

to help me through stress while facing some of their own and I thought that it would take the

paper to a whole new level. When I made the decision about revising this essay rather than the

others, I knew that I would want to include something about how my parents face stress since

they are both in the medical field. As it turned out, I wrote about my father since it made more

sense based off the way I was writing it with his. My father faces a lot of stress while being a

surgeon and I knew that I wanted that to be included because I thought that that gave my source

a completely new sense of validity that it didn’t have before along with my essay. One of the

main points that I focus on is the fact that student’s stress is almost higher than adults and I

thought that would be a really powerful way to show it. With the revisions and comparing the

essays side by side, I think that this change in PoV has helped my understanding and the

importance of stress and had helped me realize how big of an issue it really is. I knew all along

that it was a big issue, however I never really knew how big until I wrote this essay and did the

research.
 For this semester, I feel that while I have learned a lot as a writer and what works for me.

I have for sure noticed, based off the personal topics that I wrote about this year, which ones are

worth making something more. For instance the difference between my first essay and my

second. My first essay was one of my favorite essays that I’ve ever written because I really got to

open up to not only you but myself about how much I missed my brother and how important he

was to me which was something that I always knew but not how much. However while my

second essay is written about someone that did and does still change my life in immense ways,

the experiences are some that can allow me to produce the same effect. For the essay that gave

me the most challenge, it would probably be either the second or third essay. For the second

essay it is about what I said before, that while he is someone that had impacted my life in a lot of

ways, there are a lot of other people that have done the same and I would’ve been able to

articulate that better and show it better. And for the third essay, I just think that I chose

something confusing and while I love the message that it gives and the question that it begs

people to think about, I think that there could have been an easier way to go about it. I think that

in the overall sense, I have learned that I do the best writing when truly talking about my

personal experiences. Things that I experience everyday and effect my everyday life. When I

wrote about these types of topics this year, I got good results and I realized not only the ease of

it, but also how I can make myself realize so much more about myself and how I may really feel

about situations whether or not I am willing to admit it.

Sincerely,

Anisha Moran