COMPARE/CONTRAST – SUBMISSION IS, IS NOT

T/F Christian Submission is about always giving in to others.

T/F Christian Submission is about who can be the lowest common denominator.
T/F Christian Submission flows out of strength, not weakness.
T/F Christian Submission must come in relationship.
T/F Christian Submission is about sacrifice.
T/F Christian Submission is about honor.
T/F Christian Submission flows from the filling of the Spirit.

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Ephesians 5:18-33 (NASB)

18And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,
19speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making
melody with your heart to the Lord; 20always giving thanks for all things in the name of our
Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; 21and be subject to one another in the fear of
Christ. 22Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the
head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the
body. 24But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their
husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church
and gave Himself up for her, 26so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the
washing of water with the word, 27that He might present to Himself the church in all her
glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and
blameless. 28So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who
loves his own wife loves himself; 29for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and
cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30because we are members of His
body. 31FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND
SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. 32This
mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless,
each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must
see to it that she respects her husband.
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EPHESIANS 5:18-33 // CHRISTIAN SUBMISSION, Christian Marriage, Christ and the

Church

Our starting point today is Ephesians 5:21. Here, the author has gone from what the church
is to what it should be. ELABORATE In the church, our relationships should be greatly
changed/transformed by and because of Jesus.

SUBJECTION / SUBMISSION – v. 21
1) What is the appeal to all believers? (v. 21a).
Submit to one another.
The concept of mutuality between believers is a regular NT theme, being found in John’s
form of the “love commandment” (John 13:34)…and appearing in many ways throughout
Paul’s writing…already in this letter in (4:2).
It is the attitude that believers, as members of the body, should have to one another (1
Corinthians 12:25) and is closely related to that humility to which all are called (4:2).

2) For what reason does the author prescribe the activity of subjecting/submitting to
one another? (v. 21b)
out of reverence/fear of Christ.

3) What does the author mean in his usage of fear?

θ ο β ο ζ - fear ∅ terror…it is instead a reverential fear, with a motivation of love / ASLAN

In 5:22-6:9, we find more tangibly the idea of mutuality:

Form in Ephesians and Colossians:
• Wives, be subject to your husbands as is proper [in the Lord];
• Husbands, love our wives.
• Children, obey your parents;
• Fathers, do not annoy your children.
• Slaves, obey your [human] masters;
• Masters, treat your slaves justly.

Martin Luther referred to these passages as “Social Code” for those who are in Christ.

These can be looked at in a couple of ways: explicitly about marriage, parenting, etc…OR as
a working out of V.21. We will not ignore the first, but our focus will be to better understand
the second.

: To understand that the rise of the Christian faith had such an impact on the Gentile world
that it changed the status quo of personal relationships across family and social barriers,
through the principle of equal treatment and mutual submission in the Lord.

: To understand that all believers are called to mutual submission to one another, and this is
especially true for husbands and wives, who are called to live together honorably after the
pattern of Christ and the church.

MARRIAGE AS A MODEL OF THIS ATTITUDE – v. 22-33

4) Why focus on marriage?
It is the closest of voluntary relationships

Women:
5) What is Paul’s appeal to Christian wives? (v. 22)
submit to your husbands
***ADD SERMON NOTES (INTRO)
Since wives are addressed directly and husbands are not told what to do if the wife does not
submit, it is probably right to assume their submission to be voluntary…and their submission
will of course be to husbands who love them as Christ loved the Church (v. 25).

6) What reason does Paul give for this submission? (v. 22)
as you do to the Lord
This sentence concludes with a motivation – where the action is not based on the husband...
-This is used to prepare readers for what’s next: the relationship of Christ to the
Church.
-“It (submission) is not only ‘horizontal’ but also contains a ‘vertical’ component.”
Almost as if, “wives, this is your religious act…your worshipful obedience to God”.

Take a look at next verse…V. 23: Paul makes a very similar discourse to the Colossian
Christians (3), but in that message, he keeps the marriage talk very straightforward and
clear…BUT, for some reason (not totally known to us) we have a tight correlation between
these relationships and teachings about the church.

Men:
7) What do you think is meant by the references to headship in v. 23?
What’s for sure is that “head” in the OT always is used as “head” over a collective, not of an
individual.

What’s also for sure is that the useage of “head” here allows for Paul to transition into a
discussion on the broader, “church”.

It’s possible that Ephesians may be giving a deeper definition. What if we considered
headship to = “source”? As Adam was the source of Eve (from his body)…and as Christ is
creator (and thereby) “source” of the church.

I do like this because it makes sense in light of the husbands calling in vv. 25-27.

8) What is Paul’s appeal to Christian husbands? vv. 25-27. Based on the Christ
example, is this something that has been done, will be done, or both? How can
husbands “give themselves” for their wives on a day-to-day basis?
“LOVE” : Of course we know there are 3 hebrew-and corresponding greek words for our
“love”, which do you think is used here? Agape

What do you understand the form, “agape”, to mean? Unconditional Meaning is seen in the
example of Christ (ahead)
What manner of love is this that Christ exemplifies? “sacrificial love”

9) What are the results of Christ’s love for the church? In what way does this connect
to the attitude of husbands? First part: READ 26-27. Second part: Husbands cannot do
this for their wives, of course, but they should have the same attitude: They need to view
their wives as spotless, holy and pure, because Christ has made them so.

READ 28-29 and summarize

In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies (v. 28). Just
as Christ sacrificed himself to serve the church, men should make sacrifices to serve their
wives. They should do nothing from selfishness, but in humility regard their wives as better
than themselves—and the women should do the same (Phil. 2:3). Paul is calling for mutual
respect and submission.

READ 30 “Christ nourishes and cherishes the church, because we are members of His
body”

READ 31-32
:31 quotes Gen 2:24 – Where do we normally hear this verse quoted? WE really ONLY see
this and use this as a marriage verse…but historically it was widely known and used in
Judaism for varying reasons.
-In the context of this passage, it serves to strengthen the marriage bond > BUT it is also
here to associate Christ and the Church.
-I think we are wise to embrace the marriage meaning…but we must recognize that
Paul states explicitly in :32 that he is using this to emphasize the relationship of
Christ to the Church. HE SAYS:

READ 32 “this mystery is great” – It’s almost as if Paul is saying…”I’m trying my best
to explain this”
:32 is really THE APEX: and we find it based on :31 > (so this is unlike most sermons, in that
Paul invites readers into his main text in the middle OR end of his discourse)

10) How is v.31 talking about v. 32?

In the incarnation, the Son left the Father and cleaved to humanity, becoming “one flesh”
with the Church. *Augustine, 198, Church Fathers
What does this imply for us cleaving to Christ?
We may consider what the Bible says of a holy wife.

How can two people be one? Paul says it is a profound mystery—but then he says, I am
talking about Christ and the church (v. 32). Since we are all united with Christ, we are one
in him. Not just in marriage but also in Christ, our spouses are part of our body, and we need
to treat them as well as we do ourselves.

Paul summarizes the discussion in v. 33: However, each one of you also must love his
wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Whether we are male
or female, when we are filled with the Spirit, we should love, respect, and submit to one
another.

11) What is Paul’s summary of mutual respect and submission in marriage? v. 33.
:33 Closes this discussion using Christian marriage…and if we could now read on 6:1-9,
we’d see that a Christian’s relationship should be mutually submissive because those
virtues characterize the relationship of Christ and the Church.

12) Why do you think Paul left out the “love” in speaking to wives in v. 33? What is the
root of this respect he calls wives to?
What she loves, she reveres, and she reveres him as head and loves him as member of the
same body. What is the root of this respect? ***this respect doesn’t come from fear, but
from love.

If both had the very same roles, there would be no peace…one is guiding, one is supporting.

What I may love most in the reading of this passage (I can have a dark sense of
humor/irony)…is that Paul makes this wonderful case for mutual submission b/c of Christ…
but we know well from scripture that Paul and his buddy Barnabas struggled to find
resolution in their disagreement over John-Mark…and ended up parting ways. IT IS NOT
EASY.

THERE IS A KEY TO ALL OF THIS:

Having written 5:21 under the influence of 5:19 – COMPLETING the statement of 18-20 and
fleshed-out in 5:22-6:9.

18-21: fruits of the spirit of Christ in us…

-Be filled with the Spirit, speaking in psalms, hymns, & spiritual songs, singing and making
music, giving thanks, submitting to each other…

Our Submission to each other is an outworking of the Spirit’s filling of our lives…and
transforming us.

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V.18b: Only when filled with the Spirit do people willingly submit to another and learn not to
insist on their own rights.

Grammatically, verses 18-23 form a very long sentence: "Be filled with the Spirit, speaking to
one another…submitting to one another, wives to their own husbands." These participle
clauses tell us how we are to act when filled with the Spirit: speaking to one another, singing,
and submitting to one another. The grammar indicates that Paul is continuing the same
subject rather than switching to something new (even though many translations start a new
sentence and new paragraph at verse 21 or 22).

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CREATE A SITUATION FOR DISCUSSION / How does Christian submission play out in
real life?

APPLICATION QUESTIONS
1. In vv. 21-22, what do you feel the word "submit" means?
2. How can two people both submit to each other? Give examples.
3. What are some of the reasons people don't submit to each other? Think of some times
you haven't submitted to your spouse (or parent if not married), what were the reasons?
What do those reasons have to do with reverence for Christ?

For notes and discussion go to:

***With all of this love & tolerance, there are also clearly defined roles and responsibilities
(i.e. teachers/leaders/authorities). Paul seems to even consider himself as one among
others in the body of Christ, yet superior in authority.