Who Are You Really No Trims

Who Are You? Really!
a travel-guide to life

a travel-guide to life
Compiled and Edited by Stuart Rose
Winchester, UK Washington, USA
First published by O-Books, 2010 O Books is an imprint of John Hunt Publishing Ltd., The Bothy, Deershot Lodge, Park Lane, Ropley, Hants, SO24 0BE, UK office1@o-books.net www.o-books.com Distribution in: UK and Europe Orca Book Services Ltd Home trade orders tradeorders@orcabookservices.co.uk Tel: 01235 465521 Fax: 01235 465555 Export orders exportorders@orcabookservices.co.uk Tel: 01235 465516 or 01235 465517 Fax: 01235 465555 USA and Canada NBN custserv@nbnbooks.com Tel: 1 800 462 6420 Fax: 1 800 338 4550 Australia and New Zealand Brumby Books sales@brumbybooks.com.au Tel: 61 3 9761 5535 Fax: 61 3 9761 7095 Far East (offices in Singapore, Thailand, Hong Kong, Taiwan) Pansing Distribution Pte Ltd kemal@pansing.com Tel: 65 6319 9939 Fax: 65 6462 5761 South Africa Stephan Phillips (pty) Ltd Email: orders@stephanphillips.com Tel: 27 21 4489839 Telefax: 27 21 4479879 Text copyright Stuart Rose 2009 ISBN: 978 1 84694 343 0 Design: Stuart Davies All rights reserved. Except for brief quotations in critical articles or reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without prior written permission from the publishers. The rights of Stuart Rose as author have been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
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CONTENTS
Introduction Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Contact
1 3 12 35 80 89 93 99 108 111 114 117
Introduction
Who are You? takes us on a journey, the destination of which is not meant to be a mystery, but it will probably be surprising and may result in some changes to our lives. This is a cautiously written introductory sentence, but the whole purpose of writing this book is for greater well-being and happiness, and reducing or ending lifes miseries which we know all too well exist in most people. It is unlikely anyone would be reading this work unless there is the belief that some action needs to be taken in this direction. We are not professionally trained in any particular discipline, and this book is not a psychotherapy. This thinking reaches very much further into areas or regions of life and being than any single discipline could. In fact, the idea of disciplines is an anathema because they can build walls and barriers whereas here, we build bridges. The original impetus for the book was talks and guidance a learned Indian Swami gave at different times and places. Now this inspiration has been expanded and extended to cover a comprehensive span of thinking about the lives we lead and what we can do to make them fully satisfying. We hope that this little book is enjoyed. Much more than this, we hope it is instrumental in helping, even in a small way, to meet the intended outcome of the endeavor. It is each one of us who has to do the work, the listening to what we ourselves are truly saying and feeling, and to be courageous in enacting the modifications or changes that are needed. Who are You? has a planned sequence of chapters, and these are best followed. It is not a book to be read through from beginning to end and then forgotten. Some chapters demand a stop to reading thereby allowing deep thought about what has been said before progressing please follow this instruction.
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Above all, find your own path to walk, solving problems to move further with the help of the inner truthful guide. Dr Stuart Rose
Chapter One
Whats in a Lifestyle?
Everybody has one, and everybodys is unique, although there can be many similarities between each one, making us more like each other than we might care to admit. In a nutshell, a lifestyle can be summed up as me it is what this me contains, both from an outward looking perspective and one that looks inward. This means that this lifestyle combines both physical and mental components (like a dress has both textile and colour). More on this below. A lifestyle is what I project to the world, and to myself. It is how I feel about myself, how I demonstrate to others and myself that this is me, how I identify me or, to put this the other way around, how I differentiate myself from others how I can make myself stand out from the crowd and be memorable, or how I can merge and not be noticed (and many, many variations on this theme). So my lifestyle also acts as my security, my castle, from within which this me can live, or try to live, happily and safely. My lifestyle can provide me with great confidence as an individual, but it can also be my protection from the outside world, even from myself! And the reverse is also true, as this lifestyle can make me feel inadequate, not good enough, and mouse-like. We are often unaware of how we develop a comfort zone around this me, and how from here we sit watching the world go by, and time go by, even for our whole life. We got through life safely but did nothing, and ended up dissatisfied and miserable. We missed the boat so to speak, although we were comfortable, perhaps. We never for a moment dreamed of changing anything,
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we never had the courage, never knew how. Its a known fact that people dont like change, that it is avoided, because its unsettling (rocks the boat), destroys routine, and having to re-establish ourselves can be a painful process. Best leave things as they are! Animals, too, are as set in their ways as this, but they dont have the intelligence to do anything about it. We humans do. Lets look at these components talked about above in more detail, starting with the physical. When we talk about the physical, there is nothing left out and so perhaps material is a better description in this instance. Its everything outside of my mind, and includes particularly includes my body: its shape, size, and form, as well as its coloring, even how it holds itself, what it does with itself. Of course, my lifestyle also includes the trappings of life: my car, home, clothes, ornaments; the other people in my life (partner, family, boss, enemy); the multitude of things I do. The list is seemingly endless. Much of the lifestyle elements comprising the mental components are inherited or learned from our parents: particular likings and dislikings, ways of being and thinking, opinions, tastes, and so forth. But mine is a distinct mix of all this, plus what I have chosen, adopted, been sold, created, and developed. More, it is comprised of what I love, what I have positive emotions for or about, and my aesthetic predilections. The net result of all these influences is me, right now, as I stand. How do I feel about this?
Different Types of Lifestyles

Today, people prefer not to live like animals, so the quality of life is much more central, much more important. Great importance is also given to living with matching my own values with those of society, sometimes at any cost, forcing compliance. The physical or outer part of me has prime importance while the mental or inner is secondary, perhaps becoming more so. Why is
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this? The simple, possibly over-simplified, answer is that money, power, strength and energy (the survival of the fittest and so primal), and ownership (of people as well as things) claim the greater value and have become the source of security. Another way of saying this is that society holds sway over the individual, and feelings of insecurity occur if there is deviation from this norm. If Im not in with the in-crowd, then Im out in the cold out of money, status, friends and more. Im not brave enough, or courageous enough, to be an individual. The social norm has to be central, and our individual lifestyles have developed around it, colored by what it dictates, following the piper! And yet, oddly, we are made to think I am different, ahead of the in-crowd, a complete individual (just like everyone else), driven surreptitiously by just a handful of entrepreneurs with big advertising budgets. However, for a few brave souls there can be a real (or assumed real) individuality with lifestyles to match, and we can look at five types. But first we must seek a way to understand why some buck the trend. A word that seems to sum up the rationale of these people is health. This is not medical health, but a much more all-encompassing health. It will be seen that this word also equates with happiness. Why are their lifestyles healthy? Is the answer to live healthily? And what does this mean? Is there a clear answer? Perhaps there is. But do clear answers help me to live peacefully? In life, if there is no clarity, there can be no real peace. We have to set priorities! We can suggest that there are five types of lifestyles. The types demonstrate a movement towards its opposite and back again. A journey. An exploration. If we stay put in the same lifestyle for life, then life can become something of a prison, a stagnant pond. The movement does not have to be radical or all
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changing, it can be gentle and satisfying, it can be beautiful. The list below reads a little like going backwards before going forwards to the same place we started from. But this is not the case, as there is learning on the way. The different types of lifestyle are: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Healthy lifestyle From healthy to unhealthy lifestyle Unhealthy lifestyle Unhealthy to healthy lifestyle Again, healthy lifestyle
Types 1, 3, and 5 indicate particular ways to live; 2 and 4 indicate transition. As has been described, many points, factors, habits, and decisions are responsible for where we find ourselves, and its up to each of us to work out just where we fit into this plan. Are we moving at all? If the answer is yes, then where have we come from, and where are we heading? Is it towards happiness, or away from it? If we are static, have we reached that point from a high or a low position? Or have we been where we are for so long that it is impossible to tell from which direction we came? Its important to remember that life is always in a state of flux. The past is gone and finished. Nothing past can be changed, which means that if we were in the same position now as we were, then what would happen is entirely different from what did happen. Nothing in life can be exactly repeated. Wherever we position ourselves in this list, thats where we are, and what is important to do while this is fresh is to see how we feel about where we are. Is there a happiness or an unhappiness or an in between? Are we comfortable or uncomfortable or in between? And, is our present lifestyle what we really want?
Stuart Rose
Prediction gets results

Through the process of observing others, we can see a snapshot picture of where we think they are and, in the process, learn about ourselves. Then a question can be asked: are we the same or are we different? Relating others to our own position is not proposing that we evaluate and compare ourselves to them. Thats a detrimental activity! What we are intending is a prediction or assessment of what might be happening to us, and thereby helping to clarify who we are. Two examples will hopefully demonstrate what is meant, and both of these stem from the standardization and sameness that is occurring in our society today. Both are common examples of how easily we follow (or are led) to be like everyone else a feature that can be likened to an innate herding instinct. First, it is plain to see that many non-western people are now following a western way of life, which means their lifestyles have changed as they have adopted new cultural elements. For example, western shops are now in High Streets all over the world clothing, food, banking, and so forth. Non-western lifestyles are not travelling West, which means that the world is not getting more mixed but more the same. Second (and sometimes an outcome of the first example), introduction of new foods, or new ways to buy and consume food, can change traditional cooking and eating habits that have a major knock-on effect to family life. In the West for example, supermarkets, fast foods, and convenience foods have almost completely removed the need to cook and, because of this, many families no longer eat together. Family life seems to be changing due to these and other trends, and this means that the relationships between family members in many instances are dissolving, becoming more disparate. Combining these two examples may lead to the paradoxical notion that one is getting to be more the same as others (coming closer together), yet, at the same time, more on our own (moving
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further apart). From these and many other examples that we will need to bring to mind in our self-analysis, its possible to see where one can start to predict how changes to the lifestyle may have occurred or may be occurring, or, conversely, from which direction one can see where changes might come from, or may wish them to come from, in any future lifestyle change. To live in a particular way with different habits such as food habits or eating habits, dress habits, selection of material according to taste and feeling, likes and wants, also adopting new tastes and new ways to have more and more feeling and emotion is guided and controlled by the intellect. To be in fashion and in line with the changes happening in society, is one part. To keep material, money, power, strength, energy, and so forth at the centre of the plan to achieve, to possess, to have, for enjoyment and pleasure, is the second part. So maintaining social, political, business status, image, name and fame, family and friends, has to help in that listed above. The question is how to achieve (to grow, to gain), not why to achieve. Everyone knows why to achieve. How to achieve, and maintain (keep) what has been gained, is difficult, as are answering questions related to where do we go from where we currently are. To start addressing the how question, we can consider our not yet grown side is bigger inside, or our not yet known side is bigger inside, or even our not yet developed side is bigger inside. Facing this and to put in sufficient energy and focus to proceed in the lifestyle is a challenge, which in turn gives the feeling of newness (not new feelings because the result will be the same, a greater change is required).
Guiding light
What are the prime influencers which we might need to use to bring about change, and will this change be made by free choice
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or not-so-free choice, by imposition, by necessity what is most important? It needs to be said that one might be happy in the existing lifestyle and see no reason to change. However, we have said that the world never stands still, and changes occur regardless of our desire, whether it be to change or stand still. So the static position, the comfortable position, might be an illusion there may be no choice whether to change at all. Having change foisted upon us means that we need to be proactive in establishing the values and qualities of the changes life serves up to us. If we dont, we will have to accept what is dished out whether we like it or not. Sometimes this is inevitable, we just have to make the best of a bad job, but sometimes we can be ahead of the game and change our lifestyle how we want. Perhaps the greatest guiding force for change, and further changes, is money, power, and to be controller of all monetary movement. Money is an external energy; currency is the term for it. We struggle to maintain the upper hand, control, in the movement between two or more currencies (not necessarily financial ones) and influences, to keep one currency as the ruling currency among other currencies. To describe this scenario as a war is probably an overstatement, but it is certainly a battle (of wits, of values, of desires). How can ones lifestyle be more spiritual, more emotional, more loving, more affectionate, and more compassionate in this turmoil? It is very, very difficult to find someone who can be like this.
Forceful living
All psychosomatic diseases, as well as many other diseases such as cancer, HIV, AIDS, heart related diseases, and vital organ related diseases are the result of forceful living, living in a particular way, which becomes a lifestyle. Many habits, attrac9
tions, impressions, qualities, and factors, are forces behind living in this way. These forces are supported by correct reasoning, which helps us to avoid feelings of wrong-doing and of guilt when the adverse result appears. They are a mental preparation for doing the right thing. Because there was an acceptance of a mistake or wrong-doing, it does not mean to say that a correction took place. The realization that we live an unhealthy lifestyle does not mean that the old habits were changed and a healthy lifestyle started! The lifestyle of anyone is not the result of living it for just one day, its much more than that. Each lifestyle is a complex web of an individuals likes and dislikes built over time. Simply being alive is not the goal or purpose; if it were, then we would be living at the level of animals. Luckily we dont! Dont we?
Questioning ourselves
We have implied that there are as many lifestyles as there are people and that each is unique (although of a pattern). Some people manage their lifestyles better than others, or appear to. Some people appear to lead lives which are on the whole happy, while for others, misery is the main feature. How is it that some people seem to manage better than others? Is it that they treat life like a battleground, fighting their way to success and destroying others in the process, and that gaining a successful lifestyle is wholly a matter of survival of the fittest? We can be certain to say that all human beings (all of us) are not saints and prophets. So, who are we, and how are we living? Are we living in a monastery? No. In society? Yes. Are we living in and with a family? No, or sometimes. Do we believe in religion and spirituality? Some do, some dont. Are we happy inside? Mostly not. Are we free from fear, anxiety, worries, and the like? No, not yet, although we try to be free from these. Do we feel insecure? Yes. Was there something missed in our childhood, such as toys
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and material things, or love and affection? Did we behave well with each other, or was childhood also a battlefield? Do we carry feelings of not being cared for at some point in our lives? Are we trusting or distrusting? Are we searching for something? If so, what? Where are we searching? Is our search for true love and affection or for the more material things like money, power and strength? Is it possible for us to give what we dont have? No, it is not possible to give what is not in us. Even if we try to show that we can give what we dont have, or try to show that we are searching for something, how can we understand whats going on? Maybe we have taken out a loan so that we can be seen to give, but it will need repaying when the loan is due. How can one have peace, satisfaction, happiness, love and affection, sympathy and compassion, on loan? Where is it possible to get them from? Is it possible to buy them, to purchase them? No. Is it possible to steal them? No. Then how can we get them? Can you tell me? Write and tell me how (the address is at the end).
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Chapter Two
Looking more deeply into oneself

We have touched upon the questions which are vital to ask about change lets now look at them in greater detail so that we can start to get to grips with arriving at the decision to change. Its not a light decision; its one which may affect the whole of ones life, so it deserves close attention. As an introduction, the first key question to ask is, Where am I? This means taking complete stock of what our life entails all of what it contains including the responsibilities one has for oneself and others, the feelings one has about oneself and others, the geography of where we are, our financial position, what is ours and what is not ours, how we look, how happy we are, our relationships with family and friends, and more. This is a big and important task, and doing it thoroughly will form the foundation to any future change. A lot rides on its completion. This task does not include answers to questions such as, where was I in the past? (past successes and failures cannot be changed), or where will I be in the future? (this is fiction, its a dream world). This stocktaking is a completely objective appraisal of oneself and the life as it stands right at the moment. How will the task be undertaken? Some preparation is necessary. Will we need or wish to involve anyone else for some parts of it? If so, which parts? Will we take some time out away from normal routine to do it? Business people call it brainstorming and often do it in hotels! When starting, writing it all down in the form of lists is a good discipline, and they can be revised and amended as needs be. Then, when these are mostly finished, they can be brought together to make a master list, a snapshot photo of where you are
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and where you stand. One sheet of paper. Then we can ask the next question (actually two questions in one), How and why am I in this condition? To answer this honestly, truthfully, and objectively might take some courage, but its got to be done because, if we dont get to know how we got where we are, we are likely to continue in the same way of life as before there will be no possibility of change. Its as serious as that. Theres no blame attached to any of what might be found, nor praise. Thats not its purpose. These are simple questions to establish what the current lifestyle is, to know, see, and understand ourselves as we think we actually are. It can also include the mistakes which were made or avoided. Clarity must be uppermost. It must be both the inner and outer person. The final question in this major sequence is a natural outcome of the first two, which must be fully completed first. Its the crux! OK, this is me now, warts and all, where can I go from here, what do I want from my life? This can be said in a number of different ways, but these amount to the same outcome: am I satisfied or dissatisfied, am I happy or miserable, and so forth? And from this the resolve to change can start to take shape, the degree of change which is thought to be needed, and in which direction or directions. This process is an enormously positive one and involves much heart-searching (not muck-raking), which may not seem so positive at the time, but keep emotions in check, keep objectivity intact, and the picture we will paint of ourselves may be the most valuable ever produced in our lives. We will begin by looking at different bodies.
Different bodies
In all of what we have talked about so far, weve mentioned different types and sizes of bodies. These can be summarized as:
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Individual Family Social National International These five types of bodies are living bodies, and they are all interrelated in a healthy or unhealthy way. Each entertains different lifestyles, from a healthy/unhealthy point of view. The first one is followed by the others, or in combinations the world is an electronic village and has to be sorted out. Now it can be seen that we can be influenced by the others lifestyle (family, social, etc.), or we can come under the impression of the others lifestyle; we can consider the others lifestyle a better model to follow (or not), and make a copy of it or them through changing our own original, normal, natural lifestyle. There are many combinations and variations in this model. We will take a look at these bodies one by one. This is a deep analytical look much more than we have done already at myself from several angles, many of which might not normally be perceived from. To do this, we must separate out different elements in an unreal way so that each can be studied in isolation, then (unlike Humpty Dumpty) we can put all the bits back together again. The reason we need to do this is to establish and describe get to know intimately who it is that could have a lifestyle change. Immediately, it might be said that we know ourselves pretty well were not trying to prove this wrong, we just want each person to look at themselves as we may never have looked at ourselves before. At this stage, its by no means certain that a need for change has been seen, or one might have seen a need already but is lost, daunted, unclear, or have many other reasons (forwards or backwards), concerning what it is about the current lifestyle
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which may need attention. We may end up deciding that no lifestyle change is necessary after all and, as long as we are certain that this is not avoidance, thats OK too. So lets start at the beginning.
1. Individual
What comprises the individual? Wow! Where can we start to unravel this enormous question? Lets not get put off at the first hurdle but divide the question into manageable parts so that we can gently find our way in. This I, me, can straight away be divided in two. Later we might say that the division can be more than two, but for the moment two is sufficient. These two are me the physical body, and me the mental body. Even so, these are still substantial chunks to get to grips with. We can also sub-divide each of these into the four remaining types of bodies listed above, but that, too, will over-complicate our endeavor right now, although we will need to remember what we find here when we reach these types as they arise.
a. Me the physical body

We are closest of all to our physical bodies and know them intimately. Yes, we know all the warts and blemishes that wed rather not mention, thank you! But we know that we are beautiful, too, even if this is difficult to admit to ourselves. Yet its surprising just how much our physical bodies influence who we are and how we have structured our present lifestyle. We must now look afresh, with objectivity. If we can stand in front of a full length mirror, preferably naked (so as to remove our disguises or camouflage), on our own, it is possible to see oneself from a new perspective. Ask ourselves: What makes my body different from anybody elses body? We all have different sizes in height, width, weight (and, of course, gender and ethnic origin), but isnt it true that we all
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have bodies just like this one reflected in the mirror? For example, when I breathe in and out the same thing happens as it does to every breathing being: the chest lifts and drops, and life is maintained. Apart from minor peculiarities, can we agree that I am just the same physically as everybody else? And these little peculiarities that I and no-one else has, these are what makes me different, what causes me to act in a certain way. There is no need to point them out individually here, from ones own perspective they can and must be seen clearly. We have lived with them since they developed or occurred. They have influenced how we present ourselves to the world. Seeing a difference in our physical bodies (which are of a like with every other body), we create an unrealistic notion of our uniqueness felt as real, but is unreal, imagined, illusory which in turn allows me to present both to myself and to others a deceptive, false lie about who I am. And so we comfortably get on with our lives, the truths well hidden in some attic store chest. This is where change can originate: getting rid of the lies and moving towards living in truth to ourselves mostly, but the outcome of this will naturally percolate to our broader theatre of existence. (Weve jumped the gun a little here by talking in terms of the mental body, which shows just how difficult it is to talk about one body without involving another.) Standing here in front of the mirror, I can see that this body is no different no better and no worse than any other. We are all equal in this respect, and if I see myself different on this physical front (except in unusual circumstances), then attention has to be paid here. We can pose the question: If I only had one leg, would it mean that I am any less of a person? If all four limbs were lost, plus as much removed from the body as possible, again would this me become more or less of a person? What is our reply? Still standing in front of the mirror, we can look with some awe and wonderment at this reflected body. At how perfect it is for the job of living as a human being. There is nothing apparent
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that is not necessary for the performance of this job: nothing extra, nothing which is not required; the legs and arms are just the right length; the torso full of all sorts of gubbins to feed and control itself, and sweep up. The designer and manufacturer has excelled; the machine is simply beautiful in every respect. Humblingly so. This means that the body in the mirror is perfectly suited for the lives we lead, and so also for the lifestyle. It cannot be improved (although it can be superficially and cosmetically altered, and some worn-out parts replaced). Yet it can and does adapt to different situations: for example, it can be both carnivorous and herbivorous; it can live equally well in the cold of Alaska and the heat of Nigeria; it can survive starvation and gluttony. In much the same way, this body adapts to many changes during its life (not least, for a woman, by bearing a child); in fact, it needs to change because of these life events. The lifestyle undergoes natural physical evolution all of the time, which means it is likely that any change that is decided to make will be accepted and catered for could it possibly even be already in the design (in the program) that certain particular extra changes occur from time to time? We have spent time standing in front of the mirror looking at our physical body in an attempt to see it in a new light. We can conclude that it is just a machine, a brilliant machine, in principle just like any other machine which is designed to do a particular job. It even has built-in obsolescence! We give it significant importance in our lifestyle, although in fact, it is inert. Without life, it is just a lump of meat anyone who has seen a dead body can testify to this. Even with life, but in deep sleep, the body appears lifeless. Is the body simply the minds toy, something to play with: to anoint, dress up, enjoy? (There is another aspect to the physical body to which we pay scant or no attention, and we need pay it no attention here. This
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is all the autonomous systems, the changeable bits and functions: air, blood, food, control, and others. They are all vital to life and death but remain scarcely visible in our mirror.) We have spent some time standing in front of the mirror looking at the body from all angles. What do we think of it now? Is it as important as was first thought, or more so, or less so? Was it important at all? To what degree has it influenced the current lifestyle answer from 0% to 100%? Is this positive or negative? Which parts of the answer can be accepted, and which not? What is the overall conclusion? There is one more question that is needed to be asked at this point; this question will recur again and again in different guises as we proceed. In this instance, the question is: Am I my physical body? Time for some more thinking.. It is my mental body which creates personas around my physical body, and so now, with all that we have established about this physical body, we turn to look at the second body.
b. Me the mental body

The mental body seems very much more complex than the physical body and, not being material, is not clearly visible, yet we can immediately say that it is the prime influencer to my lifestyle. To approach it so that we can see clearly its influence, it is better to sub-divide it into four constituent parts. All the four work together, so it is unrealistic and artificial to separate them but, if we dont, we will get very lost in trying to establish who this me is. A mirror is useless for this job. The only useful suggestion is to find a comfortable place and relax because thinking time is what is needed (and maybe a pencil and paper). This may take a while (think in terms of days and weeks, not hours). The four parts of the mental body are: the mind (comprising our principal link to the physical body through the senses),
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memory (comprising all the past knowledge), intellect (which is where we discuss whats happening), and our ego or I-ness (which says I want, I feel, I am, and so forth) it is the deciding factor. Lets take a simplified look.
i. Mind
Almost all of the communication between me and my physical body is through the senses; it is the mind which identifies what the eyes are seeing, the taste buds are tasting, the skin is touching and sensing, the nose is smelling, and the ears are hearing and whether the body is in balance. Plus, it is a channel for what the body organs and muscles are doing and sensing (in tandem with operation of the autonomous body systems). It is also the mind which sends information back to the body (commands and responses) for action. As we can realize, these events dont happen in isolation, but in countless combinations: we can see, touch, and smell a flower at the same time, for example. This information is then analyzed and identified by the other three parts of the mental body. In itself, therefore, this means that the mind is essential to but not particularly influential to our lifestyle. Whether the taste is hot or cold, or the house is burning down, or I have fallen and broken my leg, is not of concern here. The mind simply identifies and reports to the other three parts what the senses say it sorts the information out into digestible bits then it sends messages determined by the other mental parts back to the body for action as required. The word mind used here is a little confusing because, in speech, we normally refer to all four components as mind, not just this one part. We have to live with this dual word usage!
ii. Memory
The information from the mind is automatically analyzed by the
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memory to see if there is anything familiar in what the senses say. There usually is! The memory is important to the development and management of our lifestyle because it is the storehouse of what we have previously determined, not just previous events. For example, it remembers that I dont like bananas, and responds accordingly. But Id like to try a banana again, which means that another of the mental parts has to consciously overrule the automatic response of remember what happened before, dont touch it with Ive changed my mind, yes please! The memory is full of set patterns of what we want and dont want, which are shortcuts, enabling us not to have to keep on deciding something about the same message stimuli that we have received maybe hundreds of times before. It is an effort to change the programme, which is why it is so easy to accept previous decisions the memory can be likened to an overworked office which will cut corners in order to keep up with the large and constant stream of work which pours in through its doors all day and night. Its called fast-tracking! To come to understand our lifestyle more fully, we need to look at different parts of what we are now, and ascertain just how much of it has been caused by fast-track instead of considered decisions Do I really want to be this way, or am I like I am because of the force of habit? This is what takes the time: looking at every piece of pertinent information we can think of (and even stuff which we dont normally think of those store boxes in the attic, for instance), then to consider it, re-consider it, and build separate piles for the results: for example, accepted, rejected, pending, review again, and so forth, just like in an office. Some people can carry out this task in an ordered fashion, some people are more scattered it doesnt matter. What matters is that we arrive at a series of conclusions about the relationship of the memory with the lifestyle that we are satisfied with. The memory doesnt make the decisions that are remembered, it simply records, it is the two remaining mental parts that make
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all the decisions.
iii. Intellect
The intellect is continuously presented with information from the mind and memory, and its function is to think about it and come to some conclusion, to weigh up the pros and cons. The conclusion is then taken on by the final part of the mental body for ratification and action. Again, there is some thinking time needed here to ascertain (in very much the same way as we have done for the memory) if we have set patterns for thinking about things, and set solutions or answers. Do I allow my intellect to investigate fully, or do I cut corners and only do half the job that could be done? Am I conscientious or thorough enough? Then more questions come: Are the set patterns the right ones for me; is it really me who thinks this way or am I led by family, society, patriotism, market forces, or whatever reason that isnt wholly or partly me? Am I satisfied with the answers I have come up with, or do I want to shift emphasis much more squarely onto or away from my shoulders? The intellect operates in quite a factual way. Similarly to the mind and memory, it doesnt form opinions, it gathers and considers (weighs the evidence), but doesnt decide: using the analogy of a court of law, the intellect presents all the facts to the judge, and then it is left up to the judge to make the decision.
iv. I-ness
There has been a build-up to this high point in describing my mental body until we have reached the ego or I-ness. Nothing moves without my say-so, nothing is actioned, accepted, or adopted without my agreement. Nothing! (Except for what is autonomous). I have decided all there has been to decide about my lifestyle. I have decided who I am, what I am like. The I in me is supreme.
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So what is this I? We can start to answer this question from a number of different perspectives. First of these is attempting to find the I. In my mental body, it is plain to see that there is somewhere for the senses to come together and be sorted, somewhere for the memory to store its information, and somewhere for the intellect to deliberate. These are almost physical in character. However, I-ness is different in that it does not have the quasi physical characteristics of its partners; and when one enquires more deeply into its nature it becomes surprisingly illusive, or manages to divert attention away from itself, or even puts up obstructions to protect its discovery. On closer inspection, we find its a very queer and slippery fish indeed! The power and effect of I-ness is enormous. It governs everything from the most insignificant aspect of ones life (for example, deciding whether or not to eat a banana), to the most significant, life-changing decisions. It governs all of the lifestyle: the I has to approve how I am at any one time, the I has to decide who I am to be with, where I should live, how I should talk, and what color umbrella I should use today. The list of its decisions and their qualities is endless. The I, this ego or personality, determines my own self-importance. Who gave this I its authority? We can ask: Is this power completely under our control, partly under our control, or completely out of our control? Who or what else other than this I could do and achieve what is done? But what does the I do? We can establish that it protects me and frightens me, feeds me and starves me, loves me and hates me; its always here, it does so much. The I instigates every thought, and the I is contained overtly or covertly in every thought. Think of a thought which in some way does not contain I. Can this be done? Does this I appear like a second me, thereby giving the impression that one has two selves to talk and debate issues
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together; or does this I feel as if it isnt part of me at all, that it is something separate, such as some extraterrestrial or spirit basis to who we are? Can the influence of this I be overruled if desired, and if so, who by? We have said that this I is a queer fish. It may surprise us with the thoughts that it thinks. It can be vicious and sweet, totally awful, and quite OK; and we can ask, Where on earth did I get that thought from? We hide and never admit we have dreadful thoughts; we think no-one else could have such terrors. But we all do! Thats a fact. Knowing this may be consoling, it may give the thought: Well, maybe Im not so bad after all. Everyone has a light and dark side to their lifestyle. One reason why the I is so strong, as we have indicated above, is because of survival. Whatever the cost (except in exceptional circumstances), I have to survive. I will do anything, absolutely anything, to survive every dirty trick, every loving action, whatever is required. I value myself more than anything else. The net cost of this is a deep or deeply concealed existential anguish or angst. This is not exactly an unhappiness, it is more like an unease, a disquiet, which is difficult to put my finger on, to identify clearly. If this dis-ease can be found, we can engage with it to satisfy the pain it creates. It is a pain, of this there is no doubt, and it can be quelled or dealt with, so that it no longer remains a subtle influence disturbing our lifestyle. In fact, it must be found and routed out if theres going to be any chance of complete happiness. We will look at ways this can be done a little later. Is there full approval of the decisions this I makes? Is there contentment with the lifestyle it has created? These may seem strange and alien questions indeed, but they need to be asked if one is going to be able to come to understand oneself more fully in order to know which direction the future lifestyle may take. It is only by much deep, reflective thought
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that this can be achieved. Again, as a concluding question, we can ask: Am I happy with how my I is, am I happy with the work it does? And finally, could I do without it?
c. Is there anything more than the physical and mental?

In all thats been said about the physical and mental bodies, two aspects have not been mentioned in any detail. Its where we have no control or that which is beyond any control in our lives. Physically we have to eat and drink (and get rid of whats not wanted), to sleep and be warm, to be active. These are the essentials, there is no choice. Next to these, although not essential, is the instinct and need to procreate, to have sex, to have a wide variety of physical pleasures. Thats one side. On the mental side, the essential task is to survive I have to survive at all cost and this need brings with it all of the mental means which the mind, memory, intellect and ego create and which we have already looked at. However, there is one further happening that occurs without any input from ourselves. Its effect is felt throughout both our physical and mental bodies. It occurs out of the blue, so to speak. Sometimes it is welcomed, sometimes it is anticipated, and sometimes it knocks us for six, and we are completely surprised. This is love. How come we can love ourselves, how come we can fall in love with a particular person and not others, or not experience love at all? How come we can experience love without relation to ourselves or others? Is it true that love is not dependent on time or place? Can love be forced? One thing is certain, it can turn our lifestyle upside down, it can make it rock solid, it can destroy it! And theres nothing whatsoever we can do about it. Love is a major part of the lifestyle, but we have to accept that its a wild card played by unknown external forces. Without even the possibility of love, can we say that our lives and lifestyles would be lacking the most important ingredient?
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Some people believe that we have a further body, and this idea needs to be raised here but not discussed in any depth, as it is a very substantial subject. With regard to the lifestyle, we are concentrating our attention on this life, not anything else. This third body is the spiritual body or soul. The idea is that it is this body which transmigrates after death to heaven, or is resurrected, or goes to live another life (human or something else), or achieves a state of nothingness where there is no more transmigration. The ideas are many, and the strength of belief is strong and widespread. For example, surveys show that more than two-thirds of people believe that physical death is not the end of their existence. Where do we stand on this question? This spiritual body can be described as the sum total of me without the mind and physical body, and contains a balance sheet of my merits and demerits earned during this and previous lives (the number of lives depending upon which ideas are believed). Many religions and spiritualities have these beliefs, but not all, and they are an outcome from the idea that God (or whatever word is used) is in some way separate from me, that I come from or am in one particular form or another made by this God and left pretty much alone to live this life. As so many people have such beliefs, it seems certain that they play an important role in the development of their lifestyles these beliefs involve the very nature of existence itself. We are not ignoring them here, but we are concentrating on terrestrial life (in other words, humanistic life) as it is being lived now. For many people, spiritual ideas are deeply involved, but for many they are not at all or only a little involved, and we are writing this book for all people, regardless of beliefs.
Individual (concluded)
The door has now been opened to greater insight to how the lifestyle has been managed up until now. As was said in the beginning of this section, it is a little unrealistic to look in the
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isolated way that we have because there are many influences to the development of the lifestyle, but this approach has aided our concentration on the core influence. Some wider influences will be met with in the following sections. We have found that, although imagined to be highly influential, the physical me (my physical body), is perhaps not so influential after all. Most of all, it is the ego or I-ness which has been the main determiner, the principal dynamic force, to the evolution of my lifestyle. Questions have been raised as to the satisfactoriness of this finding, and an opinion will have been formed as to how much we have been led by forces that we were unaware of. There will now be a much clearer conclusion of whether change or modification needs to be enacted. We have purposely avoided engaging with the individual in a social context up until this point because it was more important to look inwards first. However, the individual is not usually an isolated, inward-looking being all of the time, but relates constantly with the four other bodies: family, social, national and international. There is a vibrant dynamic at play between the individual and the others, and we will look at the complexities and inter-relational issues they create.We are all well aware of the dramatic social changes which have taken place in the twentieth century and, to avoid repeating, these will be mostly talked about in the following section devoted to the family, to which our attention will now turn.
2. Family
There has been a clear distinction between the prevalence of a nuclear or an extended family between westerners and those from elsewhere, but this situation is changing as western values encroach further and further across the globe. Up until the Industrial Revolution, extended families were the norm in most countries, but since then they have declined to such an extent in the West that they are edging towards becoming a rarity. This is
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now happening in many other places with the onset of the Technological Revolution, primarily in the cities. Even the meaning of the word family has changed, and the word group might be more accurate to use in some situations; similarly (but to a lesser extent), marriage can be replaced with partnership. There is no necessity for blood ties between people involved in the group. What this means is that there has been a dramatic change in the lifestyles of huge numbers of people: stability of the traditional family unit has flown out of the window, and change is occurring mostly in one direction. Whereas the earlier family contained many people four or even five generations together with siblings families now it may contain between one and four persons at most two generations and just a single family unit. One result of this in some countries is that there is a negative birth rate (where more people die than are born). It is not necessary here to look at why this situation has arisen, as we can leave sociologists to work it out; what we need to do is establish what some of the newer joys and difficulties are that influence todays lifestyles. No matter how populated the family is or was, nor how gregarious its members, each person in that group has always been an individual there always has been a need for some degree of privacy. In the smaller family, this is now almost forced upon its members thought of as a positive if it surfaces as solitude, but more so as a negative if it is loneliness. In varying degrees, both are familiar to all people, and both influence the lifestyle. On the other hand, by living in a family or group, it is easy to live parts of the others lives instead of living ones own simply because it helps avoid some of the problems encountered in fully living ones own life. We can most easily do this by disproportionally living out our childrens lives. When people live together, it normally means that they have
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relationships with one another. There are two principal types: blood or sexual. A difference between the two is that there is no choice of who is related to whom in blood relationships, but there is choice in who is the sexual partner. One view on this latter type is that if there is no sexuality involved, then it is not a relationship but more akin to a friendship or some such. Up to this point we have not talked about sexuality, yet in different ways it has very much to do with the physical and mental bodies, with being an individual, and being a family. Sexuality plays a substantial role in our lifestyle formation and management. In a broad sense, for many it is one of the highest pleasures in life. It also produces the most scruples and hangups! However, it is not the purpose here to talk about sexuality per se; we build our lives (and our lifestyles) principally around making ourselves happy, and pleasurability is one of the predominant factors in this happiness. In comparatively recent times, although not in every country or society, there has been substantial change involving sexuality: contraception and abortion is legal and available; homosexuality and prostitution are condoned; soft pornography is accepted as part of life; many, many marriages end in divorce, which, in turn, has given rise to the dysfunctional family; sex before marriage is commonplace; marriage itself is no longer a social necessity, and many couples live together and build families this way. The size of family, as we have said, has also changed beyond recognition the cement which held the members together has been washed away, so to speak. Perhaps the principal cause of this is the desire for greater riches and for the supposed concomitant rise in happiness and quality of life. Changing a job can involve changing a country, and the family unit is further eroded; riches may come, but not necessarily greater happiness changing a job can often entail forced change of lifestyle for all family members. Children move away from parents, brothers and sisters move away from each other, grandparents are dispatched
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to retirement homes (if they havent already gone to one under their own steam). There is so much displacement occurring to todays family: its no wonder that the lifestyle needs to change regularly to keep up. The lifestyle today, although faced with shifting sands and unique tests, is not all doom and gloom. Greater freedom (of movement, of morals, of individuality) can be directed to ones advantage. The world is not going to change its fast-flowing direction, yet each person can. Greater freedom within the family itself also gives greater opportunity to expand ones horizons. Yes, it is easier to follow a pied piper, but it can be far more satisfying to be ones own piper if there is courage and a firm knowledge of oneself.
3. Social, National, International, and maybe further

This final part of our section Different Bodies combines the final three bodies and looks beyond. Much that has been said in the extensive first two parts is highly relevant to the lifestyle in these broader contexts. Relationships, of course, extend beyond the family home, as most people have friends, associates, work colleagues, social groups, and so forth, with which they are engaged in all kinds of ways. And these, again, can have a substantial impact on the lifestyle. Mobility is one of the key factors: we can work many miles away from home; take a holiday on the opposite side of the world to where we live; and, in the West, move home every few years nothing is static. However, this newfound liberty may slow down (or move in a different direction) as new technology enables us to meet with family, friends, and colleagues using video phones. And we havent even begun to explore space housing estates on the moon or planets other than Earth cant be that far away! Up until this point, we might have given the impression that there is much greater freedom for everyone but, in reality, this is
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not the case. It may well be that we are more bound than ever before in most, if not all, important areas. We can look at what is binding us. Perhaps first and foremost is that we are bound by a greater degree of fear. Everything is insecure and uncertain: marriages break up, children are abducted, jobs are lost, homes are lost through debt, competition is fierce, crime is rampant, terrorists abound, cars crash, new diseases are spreading, machines (cars, washing machines, computers) break down, (not to mention fears we have about ourselves: inadequacies, inabilities, inconstancies) theres no end to the list! There is seemingly no escape from fear: it lurks never far away hidden under our apparently happy, smiling faces. Firm knowledge about oneself and the relative world releases some of it, but the unconscious tension which fear creates needs something stronger. Fear also spawns yet more miseries, and these include anger, frustration, depression, and the like, which all work together thereby exacerbating themselves to higher pitches such as road rage and suicide. New technology is designed to make our lives easier, but the reverse is the outcome! Surprisingly, we have less time, not more, and we suffer things like information glut with computers and the Internet; and traffic jams making longer travelling time with more and better roads and cars, creating more tensions such as impatience. Happiness itself still exists, but seems harder to find and easier to lose, and a prime reason for this is lifes material basis. It is the material which is most under threat, from the inability to manage it, to greed for more of it fear is never far away. This black picture is being painted to make the point that, increasingly, each of us has to defend ourselves more comprehensively. But if only the material is used to defend against the material we will never grow. This is why we are saying here that change or modification maybe needed due to the lifestyle: I am
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the way into this situation, I maintain it, and I am the only way out of it.
The individuals interface with the other bodies and itself

We have talked extensively about the individual, a little about the family, and sparsely about the social, national and international bodies. To talk more about the latter in isolation starts to become a history of the world and its new technologies. We know that these have made the world smaller by bringing people together more quickly; now they are starting to make the individual more isolated working from home, shopping (even for groceries) via the internet from home, take-away meals ordered by phone delivered to the home, chat intimately with people we have never and are never likely to meet via email groups in the privacy and security of home physical social interaction outside of the family or group is in sharp decline. What is more, the feeling of patriotism and national identity will decline as nations form closer and closer links with each other, and we become more citizens of the World or Universe rather than of a particular country. Who or what will I be willing to die for the children have gone, the country has changed, I am no longer where I was born and brought up, I have moved home several times? Feelings of alienation can arise. Who can I serve? How can it be the family, my colleagues, or my country, if they are all so distant and vague? Am I the only person whom I can serve, and does this satisfy my need? We feel lost: where do I belong? And who can I love with any certainty other than myself? My interaction with others is also alienated as it sometimes appears that those involved whether from family, social or wider origin now form one amorphous collection of individuals. The different structures have dissolved, collapsed, or merged, in turn creating new challenges but also new
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problems regarding where I fit into it all. I have to change, of this there is no question; if I stand still, the world will pass me by or sink me in its surge, and I will never end the misery, never have a chance of being happier. There is an eternal cycle of which this situation is but another manifestation. It can be likened to a smooth flow which appears the opposite when viewed in isolated sections. One way of describing it is to say that all and everything begins from a source, or evolves from this source; it is sustained by the source and breathes its life; it declines, disintegrates, returning to the source, only to be re-born, to be new again. Many of these cycles (the bodies we are discussing) occur in various sequences it is a seemingly continuous process which means that, as I exist in this momentum, I need to keep clarifying where I am. Its an odd thing that while our world (of interests) is getting bigger because its getting smaller (more accessible), our engagement with it is reducing. We sit at home and watch it all interacting with it on the TV. The individual is simultaneously both expanding and shrinking! The home (as a physical place) where we are is becoming more important than ever, but there are fewer and fewer people in it, and it is easier to change, more disposable. At the same time, the physical body becomes less important as its public exposure reduces. All of us will have experienced some of this and know that we are more on our own now than ever before, especially so if children have left, or the reason for marriage or partnership has come under question. We can notice clearly the cycles we have been through: how they began, were sustained, and finally evolved. We can establish just how much of what happened was our doing, and how much happened outside of our control how much just occurred almost of its own volition. The crucial mover in all of this was I-ness: our desires, wants and needs. Without the I, one would go nowhere, do nothing,
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just as, for example, the animal after eating just stands still or lies down and only moves again if pushed or hunger re-appears. This I-ness interacts with all the bodies, even its own physical body, in different ways: it is very versatile. Or is it? Does one interact in different ways according to the situation, or is one bound by set patterns of behavior which automatically switch in? Is the individual even losing the ability to think for her or himself? How has this happened? The point each of us must come to is one of clear decision: in this direction, or that, is my life working as I want it to, or not? Can it be improved and made happier, or not? Should I change my lifestyle, or not?
How can I start to move forward?

In the next section, we have given 112 pointers which paint and describe qualities, behavioral patterns, guidelines, habits, methods, guiding forces, identifications, experiences, expectations, wrong movements, inner motors, likings, dislikings, abilities and capabilities, some mixtures and combinations of these, and so forth, on the theme of lifestyle. It can be likened to a huge wardrobe full of clothes to try on, and we can mix and match what comes to mind to our hearts content. One could ask, why are so many points and factors given in the following assemblage? For this, the answer is: i) a house is built with bricks, but bricks are not the house itself; ii) a cloth is made of threads, but the threads are not the cloth; iii) a bicycle is made from metal parts, but the metal parts are not the bicycle itself; iv) a river is made by raindrops, but the raindrops are not the river itself; and v) in the same way, a lifestyle is made from many factors, points, and habits, but the factors, points, and habits are not the lifestyle itself! Because of any reason, when it becomes necessary to bring change or modification to the lifestyle, it is then the questions arise: how to do it and what to do it for? And we have already
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started our approach to these. Many points and factors need to be thought about, as well as looking at experiences from the past and present lifestyles. Each of us can discover for ourselves how all these elements are interconnected in different ways, in differing proportions, at different times, places, and occasions. Can one say that the picture of anyones lifestyle, even mine, is not inside? Which points or factors are missing? Write and tell me (the address is at the end), as there must be some extra points or factors which could be added to this list, even though they might not relate directly to each person. For example, the lifestyle of a dead person and a living one are possible to compare, but the lifestyle of a person not yet born is not possible to predict and compare! What is possible to predict? The percentage of pain, suffering, problems, disturbances and their cause, and the cause of the cause, will be more or less, by using such words as if, in case of, perhaps, maybe, etc. From where and when can the change or modification start? To change the house, how many bricks will need to be changed or modified? Similar questions can also be applied to other examples: just how long is a piece of string? What is more, how can we repair or renovate, which type of material can be used for which purpose, and how much is enough? It is better to have some idea, some goal, even though the goalposts may change or move repeatedly during the process of this work. We must be clear about what were doing so its worth repeating. A lifestyle is by the self, for the self, and through the self. So, when it is important to bring about change or modification to the lifestyle, then it should be by the self, through the self, for the self, and for ones own self. All these many points and factors are directly or indirectly concerned with our own decisions. Who is the final deciding authority?
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Chapter Three
The following pages represent highly intensive thinking material. Take time to go through each Pointer, be relaxed, and read them over and over again take thinking time to establish points for development and growth from what is said. This thinking material is given to help come to a better understanding of ourselves to enable a healthier and happier life, one with minimum unwanted disturbances. That is the hope. After each of the Pointers, a response or commentary is given, mostly in the form of questions, which may help and guide getting to the point or points of the Pointer, to start to expand it. Yet what is said might unnecessarily cause a diversion and only hinder what is brought to mind. The reader must decide. The responses are not in any detail of particular life events or personal understanding, these each of us need to add. Think laterally, tangentially, but most of all, think truly.
112 Pointers to a Brighter Lifestyle

Just See what Rises in the Mind and Play (O mind, you are a rascal taking me on endless adventures, and you are convincing that its me in the play, not an actor maybe its better to sit back and watch the show, enjoy the show, not be hurt or pleased by any of its events.)
1 Attitude to do
To behave, to live, in a certain and particular way. (Who is it living like this or that? Are we like what we see, or are we putting on false airs: is there pretence, or is the person under the microscope really like what they want to be? Do we really live as what is seen, or do we just think we do? What is the attitude towards oneself? Is there force to be like this, or is it a natural occurrence,
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without personal influence? Is it known what other people think of how we live, how we behave? What does the word attitude mean? So many similar questions about oneself!)
2 Adjustment
Its natural to adjust, but why does one need to adjust? Does one need to have less disturbance in the life, or to be more comfortable? Why adjust? (No need to, this life is just right. Well, almost so. If only things had been different. In any case, why bother to adjust? This life will be alright in the end. Take the easy route. Yet if theres no adjustment, survival may not be possible. Its as crucial as that. How to decide, and how much needs adjusting if the decision is made to adjust? Which part of this life is really OK, and which part needs attention? We must be honest with ourselves.)
3 Adaptation
To have, or to procure what one doesnt have, so that the existing lifestyle or future performance and activities and so forth, are smooth for us on the inside. After adapting it, a little contentment is possible. (Whats the difference between adjusting and adapting? What does the dictionary say? Does adapting mean more of a change than simply adjusting what already is? Is it possible to adapt to different situations, or is there a reserve, an unwillingness? Identify which situations they are. Is there something to gain or lose by adapting? Yes, afterwards there can be contentedness, an increase in happiness. But is there a risk of the reverse? What to do?)
4 Acceptance
For certain things, with certain purpose, is for pleasure and
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happiness. (Its a choice, isnt it, what is wanted to be accepted and what not? Then the question can be asked: why this way or why the other way? Which is right? Is there a right and wrong? But then theres another way of looking at acceptance. Where is what is being faced coming from, and am I separate or a part of it? The ego or personality might insist that there is separateness from the source, but this needs to be thought about. Either way, there can be happiness, one way limited, the other way unlimited.)
5 Openness
To receive with closedness is very difficult; its not good, it gives bad feelings. (Are we closed off, or are we open? Or are we both, depending on what mood were in? Openness is expansive, and in it, receiving can be uncritical, welcoming, happy. In the reverse, there can be unhappiness, dissatisfaction, bad faith. Does it matter about the object, or is it more concerning about the subject, oneself? To explore this further, it seems there might be an inconsistency here: is there a pattern to when we are open and when we are closed, and is the pattern based on outside influences or internal ones? And what has fear got to do with the answer?)
6 To agree
Again this is required, along with 4 and 5. (Yes, it is required, but what happens if theres no agreement? If theres no openness and acceptance, how is agreement possible, or does it manifest as half-hearted and so of less value or even valueless? Is there tranquillity, contentedness, when theres agreement, and is that why its required? At this time, are we better people, more in focus, or does being generally in agreement make no difference to us? Can we be indifferent to what occurs, and is the indifference hot or cold? Is there an in between?)
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7 Use of choice
Right to select is possible, but only when the choice is sufficient. (Just like being at a restaurant when theres nothing that takes ones fancy, nothing appetizing, nothing good to buy, nothing we want to do, nobody we like. Is it whats on offer, the choice, or are we not in the right frame of mind to make a rewarding choice? Are all choices rewarding? Maybe we have to make the choice out of what there is, whether we like it or not and regardless of the result. Have we done this in the past? In retrospect, was it a good choice or not so good? When do we abstain from choosing? How do we know?)
8 Use of freedom
For better living with maximum enjoyment, and no interference and disturbance from others. (Are we ever completely free or is freedom always a compromise? Is there freedom in a group of people together, a family or society for example, or is the most freedom always solitary? Which is preferred? Is there happiness on ones own, or is greater happiness found with others? What has pleasure got to do with this? Nothing or everything? Is freedom pleasurable, or is fun better? And what is meant by better living? Is it possible?)
9 Interest
A binding agent, like a glue, creates a bridge or passage for movements of energy: to have, to get, to achieve some things. Becomes also the cause of habit formation. (The interest that is received on ones savings or activities is not what is meant here. Or is it? Interest can be creation: one develops a liking for something or somebody, and that liking is the interest upon which action is built, making possible (bridging) the way forward. Does interest mean dissatisfaction with what one has; has one ever enough; is
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the habitual building of bridges good or not so good? Is the extreme an addiction, and is any addiction good? Whats the honest answer, and how is moderation possible?)
10 Feeling
As a base of thinking, decision, and action: works as a guiding force, or like a guide. (What is there no feelings about, or is to have no feelings, however slight, impossible? Is there a clear definition of what a feeling is, do we know, or are feelings of all sorts: good, bad, and indifferent? Can we control them, can anyone or anything influence them, or who is it that rules the roost? If we cannot control them, then can we trust them as a guide? And what of feelings upon which weve made important decisions, was the result as planned, or were there a few surprises? How can we trust ourselves? Is there a way?)
11 Value system
Importance is given on a certain basis; priority is given in looking to certain things, to show own uniqueness speciality through this. (Is each of us unique or are we all essentially the same? O, but we are all different because we each have unique value systems this is why so many people shop at supermarkets and so basically eat the same food in the same way; it is why so many of us wear unique designer clothes, watch the same TV programmes, and so forth. Why do we like what most other people like? Is it because its easier to adopt an existing value, a popular value, than developing something truly unique, truly ourselves? Is it because we are fearful of being different? Do we lack the courage of our convictions to be unique?)
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12 Determination
Or, we can say, firmness, insistence, or stubbornness, for not having some changes very often. (Are we determined not to be happier? We can stay put as we are for the rest of our lives, a little like a bonsai tree that hardly grows because it isnt given enough space to spread its roots. Is that OK? Unwillingness to even consider change must be considered detrimental to leading a full life. And how often should change be considered: once in a blue moon, occasionally, often, or all of the time? Do we have the courage to not stand still, to be open to change even when things are going alright, when life is comfortable?)
13 Following a regular routine

Once the programme is started, for particular reasons it becomes a set pattern of certain movements. Just to repeat and repeat! (Are routines good or bad, freeing or stifling, or can they be both? What is the benefit of a routine in our lives, and what are its negative aspects? Does a routine lead to an ordered life, or does not having one lead to a chaotic life? Routine may be thought of as beneficial, but it may also lead to becoming stuck, closed, fixed. How is it possible to tell when one is stuck in repeating routines and, if it becomes like a rut, how can we get out of it, what help do we need?)
14 Making it happen
Goal-oriented movement or activity from thinking, deciding, and acting in a particular way. (If we want something particular to happen in our lives, do we just hope it will and wait for it, or do we do something concrete to make it come about? When weve thought about it and done things to make something happen, who or what actually produced the result did we achieve the result unaided, or what was the help we received? Do we
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always make things happen in the same way, and, if we do, are the results always the same, or do we normally try different ways for the same ends? Which way is better, or on what does the answer depend?)
15 Improving the standard of living

Through achievements, one after the other, upgrading little by little, to be similar like others. (Yes, we can improve our standard of living, maybe all of our lives are spent doing this, but does this improve just the physical side of our lives? Are we happier through our efforts? Many will have visited poorer countries where standards are much lower than ours, but nevertheless found that the people were happier than us. There is nothing wrong in making life more comfortable, but how can we make our life happier, how can we become more content? Further, does it matter that we keep similar to others; what would happen if we didnt?)
16 For inner satisfaction

Somehow it may look like unhappiness no satisfaction outside, outer level but there is a strong inner base or satisfaction. (It seems important to maintain our outer appearance, sometimes to the detriment of our inner life. If the outer is strong but the inner weak, if externally we appear to be happy, but internally we are unhappy, where will this lead? Can this be called living a lie, and can there ever be real satisfaction and happiness living in this way? If this is the case, what can be done to shift the balance of positive effort from the outer life to the inner? Will changes need to take place? If so what needs to be done to give the inner greater strength and satisfaction? Can we risk weakening the outer life?)
17 Responsibility
Feeling of responsibility, which has some force and control,
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along with some restrictions on movement, activity or performance. (Who are we primarily responsible for, is it ones partner, children, or parents? Alternatively, is the responsibility we feel more materially based, for example, for our home, supply of provisions, or facilities? Can these be prioritized from most responsible to least? And where does each of us fit into the list? Are we at the top, somewhere in the middle, or at the bottom? What responsibilities do we have for ourselves? How does each of the responsibilities we have influence (restricting or freeing) our lives? Is this voluntarily acceptable or forced?)
18 Allowance
First to oneself, to do in accordance with own wishes and will, likes and wants. (Do we allow ourselves the freedom to do and live how we want, or is our life full of compromises? Do we value ourselves sufficiently to be able to fulfill our wishes or what is it that obstructs us? In previous Pointers, similar self-questioning has been raised and will again below. However, each Pointer contains differences and links to the others which, once met with, go towards building a comprehensive picture of ourselves. If we are free to do as we wish, who is it that chooses what to do; which is asking us to think whether we are ever completely free?)
19 Conditions
Internal or external environmental condition (any type of environment) which becomes the designer of life design! (We have a mind and a body, but do we set, invent or build our own conditions or does someone else? If the answer is not me, then who creates the conditions whereupon the design of life evolves, or does it matter if the answer is known or not? The internal and external environments exist, so can we take this for granted and get on with the job of designing our lives? Yes or no? But if we didnt create the
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environment (for example this mind and body), that is we dont know what its for, then how then can we successfully design the life? Puzzling, isnt it!)
20 Ability, capability
To swim in both types of water, sweetish and saltish, to show, to demonstrate strength and power. A fish cannot do this type of demonstration! (Are we able but have no capability, or are we capable but have no ability? Maybe we have both these skills, or a mixture of the variations, depending on the situation. In which situations do we have both, and in which situations do we have either one or the other, and is there a pattern to this? As the pointer says, a freshwater fish cannot survive in salt water, and a sea fish, the reverse. In this analogy, can we learn to become ambidextrous, so to speak? Where can we get the strength and power from to do this? Do we have it within?)
21 Can and cant

Guideline for doing, and to do according to this guideline, after knowing ones own limits. (Words from the past are heard clearly: theres no such word as cant! But some things just arent achievable, and we know it, we realize our limits. Where are we most limited, in what areas of life: practical, emotional, intellectual, or where? We can make a list with cans at the top and the cants at the bottom. Once this is seen, is it possible to work at bringing some of the cants towards the upper part of the list? Doing this, the maxim above is helpful in bringing us to work harder at seeing ways to overcome our limitations.)
22 Discipline
It creates the frame, it gives the shape, it requires effort to
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maintain for whatever it is, then only is it possible to get and enjoy the result. (Discipline or self-control is natural for some, but for others, its more difficult and here we say: just one more cream cake, it wont do any harm. And we suffer the consequences. Is discipline thought to be beneficial and necessary, or is it thought to be unnecessary and valueless, that life doesnt need it? What is the experience of purposely applying discipline to ones life, is it good, bad or is there indifference? Do we get where or what we want without it, yes or no? Without it or with partial discipline, half-hearted discipline, do we say, Oh well, we tried the best we could. Is that satisfactory?)
23 Surrender
To give up resistance, to be ready to do as per the wish and will of others. It may be at any cost for certain and specific purposes or reasons. (Everything we do is for our personal gain in some form or other, but at some point or points in our lives, we surrender and sacrifice or perhaps more likely partially give up or compromise our own desires to anothers benefit. Is this true? We may think we give everything in certain circumstances, but isnt it the case we always have the personal satisfaction that, I did it? If so, what needs to happen for complete surrender to take place? Is it possible to let the whole of the individual will go? What would this entail?)
24 To neglect, to ignore, and not to consider

To achieve what is fixed and decided by one or more than one. (The Pointer contains three slightly different approaches, albeit on the same theme, involved in some of the considerations about what to take into account when making a decision. Do we select one of these three when making a decision that is difficult, to make it easier to move forward, or when we know the outcome is already decided or over which
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we have no influence? Or is this our normal way of getting through life, that is only considering things from a limited or partial perspective, just getting by with the minimum amount of input, without breaking out of the mould, so to speak, without making the effort to fully consider all that we could?)
25 To remain in search of
Feeling of missing out of what others are having; how can it be possible to have it. (Its easy to get stuck, to not be able to work out for oneself the way forward. Yet we can feel that its inappropriate to ask for help because we each have to live our own lives in our own way, and what others might say can be misleading. This sense of incompleteness may be correct, or it may be that this search is for something we already have but dont realize. How can we find this out? Or alternatively, why are we valuing what we dont have and have never thought of having until we see someone else with it? Is where we are in life where we want to be regardless of anyone else?)
26 Manipulation
To have it, to achieve it, by any way, at any cost, requires this skill of manipulation. (Manipulation is an art perfected by some to achieve their goal, but how do we feel about it in theory? Is it a good or bad characteristic? Is it an essential quality to get successfully through life, is it nonessential, or are we forced to use it to survive? In what type of situation can manipulation be ethically or morally correct? Now look in practice: do we use it; when do we use it; do we feel good, bad or indifferent about using it; do we value the result of using it as much as we would by using a different, non-manipulative method? Is life all about getting it no matter what the cost for oneself or others?)
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27 Just to suppress
For this, past experience (as a guide) gives the guidance. Better to suppress, and to show that its easy and comfortable. (Life isnt difficult, its easy, a piece of cake its always happy, always successful, always comfortable! Is this how our life is? Normally its not, so for some reason perhaps because we might feel inadequate for certain tasks in life or in certain situations we hide the inner truth and wear a perfect mask, showing that everythings ticketiboo. Its rarely like this, but our lives can be ones of continual suppression of the truth. We live a lie and die without revealing or realizing the truth. Is this the way we want our life to be, or what can we do to live fully in the truth, what has to change?)
28 To complain
To point out certain things for improvement, with some reason and purpose behind. Difficulty in adjustment. (If we complain we are unhappy about something, and this unhappiness is quite strong, tipping the balance between what can be accepted and what cannot. We can complain about lots of things outside with the purpose of making them more acceptable, but do we complain about things inside, such as the way we are, how we think, what we have done to whom can we address these complaints? Inner complaints must be self-criticisms, which in turn can be the motivation to change in such a way that there are no more complaints. This is the way to contentment.)
29 To fight for justice

To search, to locate where the injustice is, where the weak side is, and to be a lawyer for that side. To do immediately? (It is easy to think about justice for others, but how can we assess whether something is just or unjust for ourselves? How can we see the difference between the two objectively? Talking to others can help, but if there are no others, how can we be sure that something is just or
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unjust? We must become our own lawyer and weigh up the facts and feelings, the weaknesses and strengths, for both sides of the case, and then also be our own judge to give a fair and impartial ruling. Can we then, if we want, appeal against our self-judgement? Yes, if we find new evidence, but no, if we just dont like what we have decided. If selfinjustice is left, life will never be settled.)
30 Feeling of fair
To get disturbance from unfair behaviour, or actions, results. Try to remain clean, clear, and fair. (No matter what another person might unfairly do to you or say about you, responding at the same level simply prolongs the agony, nothing is solved. Throughout life, in every aspect, to remain clean, clear and fair defends against all disturbances. Its the most substantial defence. What happens when we are attacked? What are the emotions that immediately rise up? Is it to hit straight back, or to crumple under its weight, or will it make no dent in our armour? Which is best? Solid levelness is the ideal state, so how do we achieve this? What needs to occur within us? Our strength will be found in always being clean, clear and fair.)
31 To be a protector
A sense to protect the weak side, the weak one. (When we feel we are the protector it means that we feel strong or at least have some strength, even though we may also have weaknesses. We have an instinct to survive and, within this, is the ability for selfprotection. Do we know our weaknesses well enough so that we can always be ready to support them, protect them? But we must ask ourselves, are they worth protecting, what value do our weaknesses have for us, what good are they? Can we throw them out as rubbish or re-build them with greater strengths or are we loathe to let them go, to change the status quo?)
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32 Mother instinct
Allow emotions, affections, and caring to develop towards the needy, to consider others as children (like ones own). (Another protecting instinct is the mother instinct the nurturing capability, to suckle, to promote the well-being of all. Does each of us have it, not just some or most women, but all people? Psychology talks of the anima and animus (female tendencies in a male, male tendencies in a female, respectively). Can we consider ourselves to be in some way our own mother, too, having both the anima and animus? We can nurture ourselves, teach ourselves, consider others as our own, and most importantly, we can love ourselves. This self-love is vitally important to our growth. It is not narcissistic, but much more selfvaluing, self-fulfilling. Who is the most needy of our love if it is not ourselves?)
33 Spiritual behaviour and no seriousness

In day-to-day life activity other than the spiritual field, to show, to keep, to be with spiritual behaviour. To take it is easy, not seriously, anything or any matter related to life (dont mind behaviour). (Is there a separation or distinction between spiritual and day-today activity, thoughts and behaviour? Can we identify what is spiritual and what is not? Spiritual does not mean religious, this is something entirely different. Its an outlook, a specific way of being, way of conducting our lives which doesnt have to be sombre or serious, at least, not all of the time, just like life as a whole is many qualities at different times. Spiritual behaviour can be like most other types of behaviour but with one important difference in that it understands, is in tune with, incorporates, the deep truths about life. And these can be all colours: joyful, sad, peaceful, busy, hilarious, melancholic, and just plain normal.)
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34 Reflection is Real, there is no mirror

What is there to consider, to perceive as what is not there, in its own form, and to perceive what is not there as if it is there? To be clean, happy, the center for all, and the center of all. (What is real? To answer this we must first establish what is meant by the word real. Real spelled with a capital R infers it may not mean what one immediately thinks. Real means permanent and unchanging as opposed to real which is temporary like an ice cream, its real enough straight from the fridge, but a few minutes later it has melted and is no more, or like a thought or a tree and even a person. What is real about all these? Real has to be solid. What is Real in life? Is everything that we think as real a misconception? Is our reality merely a reflection and fleeting, dependent on the existence of the mirror? What is real is that which has no reflection. What is this?)
35 Fear
A basic instinct which becomes the controlling agent sometimes, manifests in many different ways connected and related with many various fields, activities, functions, and systems. It is difficult to know how it is inside. Everyone tries to be, wants to be, free from fear. Until it is recognized, realized where it is, in which way it is, since how long it is, why it is, it is all the time more like a best companion with one! (What is it we are frightened of? The answer to this can be: things and people which threaten our well-being in some way. Fear is our protection, it says look out and then we can react to avoid or face the danger, it enables our survival. How much of our lives is governed by fear, and what does this result in? Is fear deeply imbedded thereby ensuring that we never contemplate change, change being too risky? If so, from this its easy to see fear is a roundabout spinning so fast that its impossible to get off, it is safer to stay aboard. Fear is both beneficial and detrimental, and as the best companion it may need to be
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relegated, put more in perspective.)
36 Proof and evidence

This is the source of real knowledge, to keep, to store, to collect, for verification of the knowledge, by certain tools, means, methods, parameters, for worldly matter. (Its important to fully understand the meaning of words we use. Knowledge has its opposite in ignorance. In fact, knowledge cannot exist without ignorance, and vice versa. Knowledge and ignorance refer to worldly matters, to facts and figures and the like; proof and evidence is needed to establish factual knowledge. Is life completely comprised of knowledge and ignorance, or is there something else? Are we ruled by what is measurable, the mundane? How is it that things occur to us seemingly out of the blue? Wisdom is different because its not based on worldly matters, not on facts and figures, but can we be certain that wisdom exists? If it does, is wisdom always true, always reliable?)
37 To have alternatives
Just in case of, maybe, perhaps, then what to do? So, better to have, to keep some alternatives ready. (This is obvious, but are we ever caught napping without something up our sleeves to protect us? Where or when might we never need to have something in reserve saved up for a rainy day or blue moon? Can we have an alternative to ourselves? Can we have an alternative partner, home, country, planet, child, mother or father, body, or ideal? Sounds funny, doesnt it? There is very little of importance that we can have alternatives for, and just in case something happens to something for which there isnt an alternative, what are we going to do?)
38 To identify with that, what has not to be!

To establish oneness, after that, to grow, to develop with that and in that
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established oneness, in a smooth way, for the time being! (To understand this Pointer we must know what is meant by that. That is a word which identifies that which cannot be identified, about which other words can give this that some characteristics or features which we might recognize or have an inkling of, or which we can relate to in some way. What is it in our lives which cannot be described, for which words are useless? And once we have worked this out, we can then approach the second part of the Pointer to discover what has not to be when there is that. Can there be something other than that? If that is oneness, what can be other than one? Can we grow and develop in oneness, or does something else need to occur? What is one?)
39 Superimposition
Instead of perceiving as it is, what it is, just to put some suitable colour, to add some more spices, to make it tasty. (The food is too plain, so we add seasoning, the room is too dull, so we add color, life is too ordinary, so we invent stories to make it exciting. Why do we make things appear unreal, what is the matter with reality? As in the previous Pointers, we need to establish what is real in our lives and where we have superimposed something to camouflage it, to make it appear different from what it actually is. We can start with ourselves. What is real about us? After answering this, then we can look to see how and why we have superimposed the color/spicy/tasty attributes. Is there anything real about us?)
40 Tendency to hold, fixation

Fix in a second. After that inseparable, to hold it in a loose way. (Do we know when to let go of things, or do we get too attached (superglued), making it impossible or very difficult to let go? Our lives fill with attachments, and it feels nice and comfortable some times, but at others it feels claustrophobic, suffocating. What makes us hang on to things and people and ideas? Is it fear: fear of being left alone, fear of
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not having enough, fear of oneself? The middle way is to use a weaker glue so making it easier to dispense with the unwanted fetters. To change our attitude to holding essentially means letting go. How much can be let go? Can everything go?)
41 To be with that which is not there

This means to be with that absence of a particular or specific presence, to eat like chewing gum! (How is it possible to be with something which isnt there? When it is said that it isnt there, it means not in ones normal everyday consciousness, but it doesnt mean it is not there at all. We have met with a similar conundrum above. And many people chew imaginary chewing gum! To reach this state we have to clear all our normal ways of being, as if clearing a steamed up room. Then there is clarity. This doesnt mean getting completely rid of the normal self, thats not possible, but once put to one side, so to speak, to see what else is there. The seeing is not visual, its more an understanding. There is no danger in doing this, on the contrary, without the machinations of the normal mind there is peace, joyfulness, and freedom.)
42 Preservation
At a deeper and deeper level, to store inside, to keep, to preserve. (What is it that we want most to preserve? Make a list in ascending order and see whats top. We can imagine in advance of this exercise what is our most valuable, and it wont be in any way material, it might even not be someone closest to us. Most likely it will be the truth of our inner being, or however this might be described, that we would most wish to preserve. Then, how to go about preserving it? If we are preserving plums, for example, we take great care to clean them thoroughly and cook them fully as the menu dictates, everything used to store them will be scrupulously clean, too. Then we put them somewhere out of sight in an environment most conducive to their longevity, but
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also somewhere that their health can be monitored. So, too, with the truth of our inner being.)
43 Different levels
Connections and inter-connections to these levels, just like an unbreakable network. (In the previous Pointer, when making our list, we may have noticed that its contents could be classified into different levels levels of importance, levels of value, levels of liking. This highlights the idea that we are comprised of a multitude of levels each with a particular importance, value, or liking (or even disliking). These levels might be looked upon as separate bits which go to make up the whole individual, but it will also be apparent that there is a glue holding them all together, creating an unbreakable network. But does it end there? Is this network floating around on its own in space, so to speak, or is it attached to something else? How many connections to this something else can be established?)
44 To start and not to finish

But to start again and again, and to be happy with a new start each time. (Is this the story of our lives? Is this satisfactory? Why does it happen? Perhaps everything in our lives is incomplete, and we can ask, is life itself complete or is it always unfinished? Some people believe there are more lives to live after we die, almost unendingly. Whichever is the case, we can never know the answer to whether something is complete or not, which means that whether, for example, its changing a brand of soap, or moving to a new home, or to a new life, we can be happy because otherwise we would be eternally unhappy. We can easily accept the idea of never finishing, but this also begs the question whether there is ever a start to things. Or is everything simply one continuum?)
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45 Dissatisfaction
To use as a motor to move, mother of creativity thats why its better to remain, to keep, to be dissatisfied. (Whats really wrong with how we are? The ultimate dissatisfaction might be that we have to die, that life is finite (although many nearing the end are glad lifes nearly over). What can we do about this fact of life? Absolutely nothing is the answer. We try to satisfy smaller dissatisfactions and these activities turn life into a seesaw, swinging from one to the other and back again. What for? What do we really gain from this activity, which keeps life full of distractions from its real purpose, from the truth of it all? Time-pass, is the answer. Yet being dissatisfied can be turned into the motivation to discover more about life, more about who we are, and this wisdom automatically dispels dissatisfaction, it can turn it into something completely fulfilling.)
46 Happy Ending, a hope, a wish

It becomes a dream, an expectation, and a wish that it may be, it should be, with grace and blessings, with effort and support, by any way, at any cost! Enjoyment of finishing gives the feeling of Happy Ending! Many starts, much to finish and end. Does it give much happiness? (Similar to above Pointer but what is meant by happy? What is the difference between happy and satisfied, or is there one? Yes, there is. We can be happily dissatisfied, but can we ever be satisfied if we are dissatisfied? The outcome of anything can never be assured which is why we hope and wish for the outcome we want. And we can have many attempts, even at living this life with happiness theres time enough to work towards a happiness. Is this true? Does happiness always have to be in the future? What about having it now because, if it exists in the future, it must also exist right now, right here.)
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47 Not to finish, to keep it open

After finishing, what will happen? Why is it necessary to close, to stop, to finish, to complete? Let it remain open. Not to have satisfaction from ones own work is sufficient enough to stop, to complete, to close, to finish. How much is enough is difficult to judge, to find out. To have or to take advantage of kept it open, unfinished, not complete things. To programme, to work in such a way, to be busy, engaged in such a way that, instead of starting one, to finish, to close, to stop, to complete the other one, the next one is completed, finished, closed, or stopped. Preference to do the work after starting the other one. Diverting the wish, the force to finish, to complete, to stop, to close, from one side to the other. To keep, to maintain a list of work to finish, to complete, to close, to stop, with keeping one work or commitment after starting in an unfinished state! It may be a thesis or any type of work!! (Life is always comprised of doing something and this doing can never be stopped. What is it that we cannot stop? First is, perhaps, breathing, because, if that stops, everything stops, but there are other things we cannot stop doing. Make a list of things which we do (not things which happen automatically such as growing and heart beating), but of that which will never be finished. The list can include: eating, drinking, defecating, urinating, sleeping, moving, thinking, and we might add talking, laughing, crying, and more too. The list of things to do rarely ends because no sooner than certain things are complete new ones surface, seemingly out of nowhere.)
48 From simple to complex, from clean-clear to chaos!

This is the progressive growth or development which gives challenges all the time to be inside, to be with it, and to manage it later on. After some period, the complex does not remain as difficult, and chaos is not giving any disturbance.
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(Simple is too simple for our liking, so we make it complex by turning it into an impossible knot and we cannot find the ends of the string to unravel it, in fact we like to remain bound. Its so easy to fall from the clean-clear original into the chaos of confusion. What causes all this? The answer is simple, but it can also be complex if we allow it it is the mind. The mind is not complicated, but we allow it to become so through our personalities or egos which delight in misunderstanding and enjoy creating disturbance. Can the mind be controlled or are we completely at the mercy of its games? Whos in charge?)
49 Not to be there, where it is not, and to be there, where it is!

Simplicity, clean and clear where it is, gives irritation and force to move opposite to it, to where there is complexity and chaos (at any level) there it is possible to be! It gives the feeling of comfort through its familiarity. Difficult is opposite of this opposite! So, super-complexity and best chaos! Sign of perfect growth, development. (How is it possible to get back to where we started from, and how will we find out where that is? These two important questions can form the basis of changing the lifestyle. We have spent our lifetime consciously creating distractions and diversions and now, after deciding to change, we need to find our original selves. The way out of the muddle is not to re-trace our steps, not to re-live the past, because the original self is nowhere other than right here, right now. Dont take our word for this, just look inside analogously it is daylight, but clouds obscure the sun, yet we know its shining because of the light. The work is to clear away the diffusion.)
50 Each time difficult becomes easy, so easy was difficult

Each time, during progressive growth or development, for the beginner to start any new thing or activity, seems a most difficult
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task, job, or work, so better to avoid this and to continue with the old one. Once the new becomes familiar, difficulties become less and less, its challenging portion also becomes less and less, and the result, the excitement, also becomes less and less. Now it becomes more and more easy. (Its the same with learning to ride a bicycle, learning to drive a car, learning to bake a cake, learning to know who we are. At the start of thinking about changing the lifestyle, it seems an impossible task, so its not even started. This means that the first step is the hardest and subsequent steps become easier and easier. So the first step needs the greatest motivation, the greatest force, the greatest persuasion. What is it that will give us the necessary strength? Is there a helping hand? Look within, everything that is required will be found ready, waiting. Remember how it was when making the first attempt to ride a bicycle, to drive a car, to swim, to read, to be oneself. It can be done.)
51 Challenge and excitement

Now, as it doesnt remain as challenging, neither giving excitement, better to start some new activity, project, game, work, etc., for more excitement and a new challenge, to get a kick. So the close becomes more and more! (This is how the mind works, it needs constant stimulation of the new and then it happily follows the diversion. Its how and why advertising works! Boring doesnt sell, and things must be sold to survive. Its a self-perpetuating circle. What changing the lifestyle entails is stepping off the roundabout of how we currently are while its still moving. That takes courage: what if I stumble and fall, whos going to be there to pick me up? Well, who will be there? Who do we want to be there? Who is always there to help and guide us? Thats the first step.)
52 Boring and monotonous should not be

This is a parameter to start something new; it looks like to jump
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out of the line of growth and development. New is new at many levels; once it becomes familiar it becomes old, does not remain new, as a fresh one. (Life is normally boring and monotonous, even what gives us the greatest pleasure becomes the same old routine. But the mind is devious, look at what it does to keep our attention focussed on what it knows, not on what it doesnt know: it buys her a new perfume, him a new toy for the office, and the multitude of variations on this theme. It keeps us busy with trivia, and we get sucked into the game, fearing boredom and monotony, fearing being left out of the crowd but also fearing standing out from the crowd. Were caught. Who has caught us? We have caught ourselves and are our own jailors, but there arent any locks on the doors, we can just walk out and be free. Do we dare?)
53 It looks like a last minute decision, action

Pre-calculated but not to disclose so early, thats why last minute decision, to avoid interference of others, to put pressure on others, to surprise others, and for many other reasons. (Often its better not to talk to people about ones thinking because some of the ideas might not be fully thought through. Decisions that are made might appear spontaneous, but they are often the result of considerable reflection, and we have already made up our mind before their exposure to the world. Spontaneous decisions can be unwise, knee-jerk reactions, and are easily regretted. In deciding to change the lifestyle, deliberations need not be hurried, we must be confident the change decided upon is the right one. We can learn from looking at how we made changes in the past that were successful, and from those which were not.)
54 Not to be second, but first, on top, or in glamour

Better to be in front of the camera (movie, video, or still), not to be behind, not to remain behind, but to have a skill to do
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something from behind! (Second is never good enough, and it may have to be accepted sometimes because of outside influences, but there is always the feeling left behind that things could and should have been better. However, there is only ever one lifestyle, no-one but ourselves can live it, which means that to be second can never be acceptable, we must always be first. We dont get to be first without some effort, some input a movie star doesnt suddenly become a success overnight without an acting skill, without rehearsal, without self drive. Each of us is the star of our lives, so it is up to us whether our movie is a smash hit or whether its a forgotten dream.)
55 To remain in competition, to be better, superior than others

Utilizing skill and efficiency, either to give the feeling to others, so that they feel themselves inferior, or to move, to live at a higher standard than the other, to make the other automatically inferior. They say, why arent you happy? Because the neighbor is happy! (There is no possibility of opting out of life, it must be lived. We are always in competition because it is our instinct to survive, to succeed, to get what others dont have, before they grab it. This is what has to be on the outside, and we play this game all of the time. Whether we are happy or sad is not completely in our control because outside forces fluctuate and our emotions bend accordingly. But on the inside we can decide to take control, to be in control, and here we can find happiness without relation to anything or anyone else. We know this is so because it is experienced at moments of deep concentration when doing something or making something, there are countless examples.)
56 Copy, imitation
Photocopy is more original than the original. It carries the
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mistake in a perfect way because it is a perfect photocopy, but photocopy hasnt the sense to do any correction. (The herding instinct is not just in nature, we have it, too. Its easy, in fact its normality that we follow what others are doing, what theyre wearing, what theyre seeing, and so forth. We can get all through life in this way its a breeze because we dont have to actually do or think or decide anything of importance for ourselves. Is this what we want? Is it any matter to anyone else how each of us lives the life? Of course it isnt because everybody is fully occupied living their lives. It does matter to us how we live our lives, and we dont want to be a photocopy of everyone else, living how were sold to live, as was said earlier. We want to take control.)
57 Just to do, less care and less awareness

Duty-bound behaviour, responsibility oriented, looks like mechanical behaviour, but it is not, it is just done with less care and less awareness, without getting the idea that it can be; it may be a wrong action, doing, or performance. (This is the easy way out of living life to the fullest as we have talked about above. If we are not fully conscious in what we do, then whatever we do is bound to be done half-heartedly thereby automatically reaping the reward of being insufficiently satisfying. And this is the sloppy way many of us carry on through life, and it passes, and so what! The way out of this situation involves a change from being asleep to ourselves to being alert to what we are doing all of the time, to have greater awareness of our thoughts, words, and deeds. Awareness has to be of all three together, otherwise our deeds, for example, actually are simply mechanical.)
58 To learn from a mistake and not to know about correction!

Learning from a mistake is only possible when the correction is
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done at the right time, right place. Repetition of the same mistake shows that learning has not taken place. To notice the mistake, does it mean that correction has been done? No! Then, what to do for that was not asked by the person? (Lets play a game! With a pen and paper, write down in the first column as many mistakes that have been made in life that can be remembered, both big ones and small ones. Then, in the second column, write down whether the mistake was acknowledged, and in the third column write down what had been done to rectify or otherwise correct the mistake, what was learned from the mistake. Now we can analyse the three lists. Are there any straight repeats of a mistake listed in the first column, they may have different scenarios, different timescales, but are there any essentially the same? From the second column make a self-assessment of what was done with the acknowledgement of the mistake; and from the third column assess whether the rectification was successful. Now contemplate the findings.)
59 To evaluate in a different way

Necessary to do this because, after evaluation, what to do and what not to do when it is not clear that the doing will not be better than that of others. (Evaluation is necessary, but what needs evaluating? What part of ones life? With some parts we are content and other parts not so is evaluation just for the not-so-good parts? The answer to this is that every part is in some way linked with the other parts and its impossible to clearly separate them. However, if we look deeply at all the links we will find a common denominator to every part, and it is this which can be evaluated in a different way, which means that the results of the work will affect all parts. First, the common denominator needs to be found and, second? There is no second.)
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60 While doing own calculation, to remain out of calculation of others

This is also important, to remain incalculable, unpredictable, and to manage own movement as if not calculated! Looks like spontaneity! (This Pointer is all about whether to share or not. The simple answer, which we have alluded to above, is that nothing can truly and accurately be shared. Ones experience is all there is. If we try to share our thoughts and feelings, we will not be able to give a completely clear picture, and the person with whom the attempt is made will have different ways of interpreting what we say. This means that any attempt at sharing could put one at a severe disadvantage with the other, and it is better to refrain. This does not mean we have to play a mystery game with the other and have no meaningful communication, it means to live ones own life, and only reveal what is necessary at the right time.)
61 To improve the method of collecting and preserving information

To keep a position, to maintain a chair or place, to do any activity, for any specific purpose, requires some necessary information. Collection and preservation of this information requires some skill and efficiency. (Have we learned enough about life skills, about the right life skills? What are the life skills which are most important? What sort of information are we lacking and how do we go about obtaining it? We need to know these things not only to survive but to succeed. How do we go about learning the particular information we can best utilize for our advancement? We have to be canny although not devious or underhanded, have our wits constantly about us to secure that edge which will give us the value on which we can capitalize, on which we can stay ahead. There is the saying, weve either got it or we havent weve all got some special skill, without exception.)
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62 To use this information in the best way

Exchange of information, sale of information, and use of it for many different purposes in the best way. (How we lead our lives is based on what we know. In deciding to change the lifestyle it is obviously important to find out more about the life we want to lead, which in turn means that certain decisions must be made: what is the change we want to make at the moment, what does it involve? Needless to say, any change only involves ourselves, one person, no other individual is immediately involved others may or may not be affected later. Once the direction of change is established it will be possible to search out specific information to that field. Knowing more about where we want to be is a significant help to getting there a little like learning about the sky to become an astronomer.)
63 Divide and rule, or unite and rule

To have control over movements, or any system, or function, to have or to achieve any type of result, effect, two methods exist: divide and rule, or unite and rule, or use both methods in a suitable way for specific purposes. (Divide is not necessarily negative, its a little like teasing out various strands in order to be able to approach groups or individual strands more fully, to have greater impact and influence. Uniting, the alternative way, is bringing together disparate strands which may help to give us greater impact or strength. This means that dividing and uniting are not necessarily opposites, they are methods we can use to enable what needs to be done. Also, both may be needed something may need breaking apart and cementing back together in a new order, to better suit what we want. Courage may be needed to complete this successfully.)
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64 To wait for a chance to make a big or small show!

Just to wait and watch carefully, with full patience and tolerance, for a chance or event, an occasion, to make it big or small and to achieve what was expected, what was planned and programmed, what was decided. (Changing ones lifestyle can be a major step or a series of smaller ones depending on which route is chosen. Its something which shouldnt be taken lightly, spontaneously, or without due consideration. This is why we are going into every aspect of what it may entail to help assure its success. Planning the change to ones lifestyle is imperative, although sometimes things just dont go according to plan for all kinds of reasons lifes like that, isnt it? The play looks so fluid and natural when seen on the TV or at a theatre, but every word and movement is choreographed down to the finest detail well in advance. If its not perfect, we wont enjoy it so much.)
65 To teach a lesson, to take revenge

To remain holding it up to that time, to lie low until the time is right! They know when the iron is hot that it is the right time to strike, just to catch and press the weak point. (This Pointer is all about premeditated punishment and its timing. In this instance, we are not talking about punishing oneself. Someone has done harm and we want to hit that person back just when and where it hurts most, so we store up our vengeance, our negativity, and let it fester until the appropriate time to pour the poison on just the right spot. However, the question arises, why should we wish to punish anyone ourselves, that is assuming the law will meet out its own punishment for unlawful actions? Is there another, more positive way, to deal with the situation? If our life contains anger and hate, change to the lifestyle will be made from the wrong position and is bound to fail, perhaps even backfire.)
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66 Hidden agenda
An agenda to show and discuss openly is one, while the other is hidden, which is following the open one. (When playing the game of whist, if our cards are shown to the other players they will see what the plans are and act accordingly to make sure our plans dont succeed, but that theirs do. The same with life, sometimes it is beneficial to let others know ones thoughts and plans, but at other times it is better to keep them to oneself. Both of these ways can be for all sorts of reasons but are primarily for ones own success. There is nothing sinister implied here, there is no desire to hurt, because the game of life needs to be a friendly one where the objective is to be happy. If the method chosen to achieve this makes someone else unhappy, then the motivation is wrong and no real happiness will be produced by it.)
67 In search of Yes, in search of No

To do or not to do according to the yes and no of others what was decided, planned and expected, just to show and give importance according to their sayings or advice. (Sometimes we seek and abide by the advice of others and sometimes, after receiving it, we decide against what advice was offered. Nevertheless, seeking views of others can be worthwhile, regardless of any attention given to it. Sometimes we may not realize the views of others nor what effect certain actions under consideration may have. But we have to weigh up whether to seek others help or not we have already spoken about keeping our ideas close to our chest, so to speak, as self-harm could also occur by being too open. From the others point of view, it may be beneficial for them to feel included in our thinking processes and not left out in the cold.)
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68 To do opposite, to say opposite

Not to do with the expectation of others, just to say, to do the opposite with or without any purpose. (Relationships at any level are full of games and popular psychology has many books on the subject the variety of games which can be played is enormous. Some are downright evil in intention while some are just pure fun, and some are deeply loving. Mostly they all are purposeful and premeditated, although some of the results of our games can be unexpected, and they can backfire! A game without a purpose cannot be so called and is more like an accident or faux pas. The reason for the game can be examined in terms of the effect such actions may have, for example who will it be helpful to or who will it harm. Such games are rarely idle entertainment.)
69 To find out
Out of the many methods to find examples to take an opposite stand, or to say, to speak, to do, to ask the opposite. Others should not know what for, why all these methods are being used. (Similarly to the previous Pointer, we need to be aware of what is occurring at all times. Without this knowledge we are in danger of acting on false premises, which means that the action is likely to fail or at least not produce the desired results. The relationship, even ones own inner thoughts, must be successful to provide the satisfaction, contentment and happiness that are required. To find out what we need does not mean that who has the information needs to know why we want it. If we tell them, we might be in danger of receiving only what the other wishes us to know because they, too, have their own agenda.)
70 To keep secret, to keep close

All the things, all the time, with fear, treated as secret! (Again, secrecy is vital as premature exposure of our intentions may
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adversely effect what we are trying to achieve. Relationships are complex, and it is better to be in control of our participation and actions, to be one step ahead, than to wait and be at the mercy of input by others, or to be caught off-guard. Fear is involved because it will heighten our awareness of the need for secrecy, to be a constant reminder that things can go horribly wrong without defence. Secrecy isnt trying to be devious, its trying to maintain stability. If our intention is to be devious, then its the wrong way to create positive strength, it will only end up in some way negative.)
71 To protect the weak and the weak point

Protector is stronger. What to protect? Why protect? But know very well the reason behind the protection. (Everyone has vulnerable points but we keep them well hidden less someone uses them for their own benefit, not ours, to thwart our plans. We may also know some weak points of others and may wish either not to use them for our benefit or wish to defend them against some more unscrupulous others. Weakness, paradoxically, can be a strength, an endearing charm, and so need not necessarily require defending. The answer to this Pointer is that we need to know ourselves completely, our strengths and weaknesses. If this is done then we will have all the strength required to live life to the fullest even though we also have weaknesses.)
72 To answer in a way which is not an answer

Sometimes to maintain prestige, face, and status, this type of answer is given. (For fun and play, or for defence, or to subtly attack, in our relationships we can talk but say nothing, respond but deflect or astound. Do we do this to ourselves when were stuck on a problem, do we try to pull the wool over our own eyes, so to speak, to avoid having to do the work to find the right answer? Either way in our play, is it to hide our
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ignorance or our weakness that we appear inscrutable? This question is similar to that which was raised in the previous Pointer about the importance of knowing oneself fully; once we start to know ourselves, this tactic can be used from a position of strength, not weakness, and we will be able to recognize more easily how others use the same tactic.)
73 To achieve that, to ignore this, to neglect this

This and that cant go together, it is a knowledge which has to be used for achievement and fulfilment. (This is this and that is that and never the twain will meet, but is there something else? This and that relate to worldly things, to differences, to separation. We can go one way, but we will miss out on the other way as two ways cannot be followed at the same time. Achievement and fulfilment are what is highly desired, but they cannot be attained through worldly things because worldly things can never be fully complete. Why? Because this and that are always separate, always in a state of flux. A search is required to find completion and this can never be resolved by going outward into worldly matters, one has to go inward, to where there is wholeness.)
74 Watching outside, observing outside, seeing outside, aware inside! Attention inside, alert inside!
Where to be, outside or inside? Its a choice. Preference is together, then both will mix. Mixture to do, but not knowing why its being done. Confusion, chaos, is the result. (Continuing this theme, we have the choice of using our senses and intellect to stay active in the world, to live a wholly worldly oriented life, driven by the ego, by individuality and separation. This seems to be the easy choice which most of us make, but it is the least fulfilling. The alternative choice is to use the faculty or ability to turn inwards, to look towards the centre of our being, towards being aware of our beingness itself. Words are not particularly helpful here which is why this way
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looks difficult, looks impenetrable, and many of us dont make the effort. Knowledge needed is not of the world, what is required is intuitive knowledge, wisdom. We all have it, but it needs waking up.)
75 Without putting in, to bring it out, through squeezing! From outside!

To get it, in an acceptable way, method, technique, may be any one, either direct or indirect. (About waking up. Where we stand is outside because our normal state is ego oriented, ego driven, and worldly. Some wise folk have called this the sleep state seemingly awake but, in reality, sound asleep, whereas the deep sleep state is when we are fully awake (without the encumbrance of the ego or individuality). Without putting in means that within is already completely full and perfect; to bring it out, through squeezing, from outside means the mind is both our friend and enemy, it is our only hope to reach inside of ourselves, but beware of traps it will set against this!)
76 To be on that side, where the power is

Does it mean it is a changing attitude? Is it inner knowledge that power can protect? Fear of insecurity! (Where is the power? Have we lost it? Have we ever had it? What is the power being referred to here? Its obviously better to be where power is because we can feel safer. This Pointer talks of sides, which side are we on? By sides, what is meant can refer to inside and outside, and power to personal power, relative power, outer power, or impersonal power, unbound power, inner power. Which power do we have, and is this what we want? And how can the change from one to the other be brought about? Trying to establish this may create insecurity because change is usually unwanted, it is unsettling. Best to stay comfortable in the warmth by the TV.)
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77 Indicator is the tail of the dog: tail moving, tail inbetween the legs, what does it indicate?
To know, to recognize the movement, the intention, better to watch the tails position and its movement. Its a nature which manifests in different ways, in front of different people, reason is not the same all of the time. (We show tell-tale signs of how we feel which other people can interpret, such as a gleam in the eyes, or particular body movements and stances. These signs often occur autonomously so care has to be taken to see what is being felt inside and to ensure we dont give too much away about what we are feeling to others, that is what we dont want them to know. This means being aware of whats going on in our lives (in our minds) at all times. Is this too laborious? Being more fully aware of whats going on within can lead to a more fulfilled life, so its worth the effort and can become natural. Will controlling ourselves curtail spontaneity? Awareness isnt control!)
78 To recognize the stronger and more powerful other one, opposite one, opponent, immediately
As a result of this recognition, the preparation starts immediately for giving up, or adjustment, or surrender, to listen, to obey, to accept, etc. Is it not indicating the tail between the legs? (By knowing oneself more fully it is easier to make correct judgements about others, whether they are stronger or weaker, helpful or unhelpful, a danger or friendly. We can bow to greater power. But what or who is always the stronger one? Does the stronger one always have to be an opponent? Looking outside at the world, most often the stronger one is an opponent because there is separation the others power may threaten ones own power. However, looking within, the power that is found there is not threatening because it can be no-one elses power than ones own. Using different words, this power may be transcendental and out of reach, or it may be immanent and wholly
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within reach. Is it the same power?)
79 Same way to recognize the less strong and less powerful, where to play is possible
As a result of this recognition, the player within wakes up to play and enjoy. (The power which is less strong can be perceived as the individuals power. When power is thought about, one can come to the conclusion that an individuals power is puny in comparison, say, to the power of nature, to the power which makes each body, or tree, fish, even a blade of grass and a thought. If all power is not the individuals what does this mean? It means that we can relax no more struggling to survive, no more fighting for an individual place, no more trying to buck lifes trend we can realize we are part of a play, that there is a script which we dont write ourselves, which we simply act out. Oh what fun!) The following final thirty-two Pointers, Nos. 80 to 112, are all about mixtures and relationships. The mixtures each need to be looked at from two directions: first in terms of relationships with others, that is projecting outward; second in terms establishing who one is, that is going inward. In both cases there is activity, and each needs to be looked at both from outside going inward and from inside going outward: by comparing ones responses on these two directions, it will be possible to see where change may have occurred or where it may need to be introduced or made. Each of these Pointers can be seen as shallow and deep the shallow may be clear to see, but the deep may need to be illuminated. There are no individual commentaries to these final Pointers.
80 Mixture of: i) Expectation, ii) Players play, iii) Allowance to play from two sides, from both of them
A childish question coming from the child/adult is that, i)
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Nobody plays with me, ii) Nobody allows me to play with them! Or either you play with me, or I will play with you. Both, together, can give disappointment while playing at a superficial level, but not at a deep level.
81 Mixture of: i) Doing for others, ii) Doing from others, iii) Doing for oneself. How much is enough? Better to know!
For not to be selfish, do for others; doing from others is not the same color! So, doing for oneself remains pending, it remains for someone who can understand and do; so, to wait and watch is the option.
82 Mixture of: i) Doing at one place, ii) Doing something at another place, management or it can be a mismanagement!
Simultaneously to do two different things at two places, and to be ready for a third one to do!
83 Mixture of: i) Job, activity, ii) Personal activity or private, iii) Home activity. Interest for i), ii), and iii) can be more, less, or changing!
Any type of activity requires interest, but it is also possible to do it without interest! How much interest should be enough, in which activity? Better to know!
84 Mixture of: i) Care, ii) Negligence. What has to be cared for that is neglected? If possible to neglect, that is done with more care.
Again, all activities are not possible to do, even with interest, so better to know which activity requires care and which is possible to neglect and ignore. Again, how much neglect will be
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enough? Better to know.
85 Mixture of: i) Habit to participate actively in group discussion, ii) To remain passive at the time and to be an active observer in a silent way. Better to learn to sit quietly and listen!
Opinions, suggestions, comments, criticism, etc., are necessary to exchange or to bring out in open discussion. This does not mean that no-one has to play, or can play the role of passive observer! To control, not to behave, to react, to talk, with any impulse.
86 Mixture of: i) more and more, ii) less and less, iii) without and at the same time with, for something else.
Attention, awareness, and concentration for any activity or doing, requires more, less, or equal, but not somewhere else.
87 Mixture of: i) giver, ii) receiver. When to be giver? When to be receiver? And when not to be any one of them, or both of them.
There are two types of flow or movement, i) giver is giving, ii) receiver is receiving. Now, on and off of any of the flow of movements is required for satisfaction.
88 Mixture of: i) speaker, ii) listener, iii) No, I will not do any of this i, ii, or to do at the same time i + ii. When and whom to say what should be clear.
Again, try to avoid the clash between the two flows or movement as is i) speaking, ii) listening. Both are speaking at the same time on the telephone, and both stop to give a chance to the
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other, then keeping quiet, again both starting to speak at the same time, so the telephone company can earn!
89 Mixture of: i) demand, ii) supply, iii) without demandsupply, iv) no demand, no supply, is old, now more demand and less supply!
Knowingly not to supply, knowingly not to demand, so that it is possible to say: i) you have not given to me, ii) you have not asked me for that! Value becomes less when it is supplied or given without demand.
90 Mixture of: i) control, ii) no control.

What has not to be controlled is under control, and what has to be controlled, that is free from control, is out of control!
91 Mixture of: i) important, ii) less important, iii) not important. What is not, it becomes very important.
Habit to treat VVIP and VIP, we have no idea about simple important, less important, and not important, etc. Better to know and differentiate.
92 Mixture of: i) to listen, ii) to obey and to do, iii) just to listen and not obey, not to do.
Better to recognize who is telling, speaking to whom, and to be ready for any result or consequence.
93 Mixture of: i) to give importance, ii) dont mind.

What is serious and what is not serious, maybe its a joke, better to know, isnt it?
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94 Mixture of to take: i) everything seriously, ii) everything lightly.

When to be serious and when not to be, better to know and act accordingly.
95 Mixture of: i) extreme, ii) middle.

To know and act accordingly. Extremes have to be reduced and made less; middle has to be maintained.
96 Mixture of: i) use, ii) misuse, iii) abuse, iv) proper use.
To use is all the time. It can be misuse, abuse, or proper use. Many times effort is made not to misuse, not to abuse, but for proper use! Better to know how to use properly.
97 Mixture of: i) to avoid, to prevent, ii) not to avoid, not to prevent.

Effort is made to prevent, avoid; what is to be prevented, avoided, is otherwise.
98 Mixture of: i) spiritual, ii) material, iii) in different proportions or equal proportions. When to be what?
Just to live spiritually, when and where is not required; this does not mean becoming or having a materialist approach.
99 Mixture of: i) inside behavior, ii) outside behavior, iii) inside as outside, and outside as inside behavior.
Two types of behavior, inside and outside: outside behavior should not be inside, and inside behavior should not be outside.
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100 Mixture of: i) private, personal, ii) public, iii) public item becomes private and private treated as public!
What is going to be public is not going to remain private. When to make personal public, better to know.
101 Mixture of: i) giving up, ii) holding.

Actually, the tendency to hold should not be developed. When to give up what should be clear, as should to be in readiness for it at the right time and place.
102 Mixture of: i) freedom to decide, ii) fear of decision. To be or not to be, to do or not to do.
Both are necessary and important, better to know the best use of the situation in a proper way.
103 Mixture of: i) to be responsible, ii) to give the responsibility and to allow others, iii) to give up the responsibility.
Either to be fully responsible or not at all means not ready to share the responsibility in a proper way, because of fear of losing!
104 To select, or to pick up, or to choose, or to pull out, the fitting to own material or things as a result. Disturbance either inside or outside.
During the time of discussion or talking with each other, the person plays the role of a listener and, at a certain point, interrupts the ongoing discussion or talk by becoming the speaker or communicator of own feelings. This happens because some points fitted perfectly to own lifestyle or habits!
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105 To take over from the half and to finish without starting!
Just wait and watch for the starting of any matter or activity and, once it is started, half way through to take possession and finish it, or complete it in own way. This means, one starts and the other finishes or completes.
106 To see the post or the chair and the person separately. As a result of this, able to give respect, honor, and acceptance to the person easily.
Some people are able to see this type of difference in one. This means that a person is not going to remain the same all the time, a person changes, and the post or the chair on which the person is sitting or is having will remain all the time. In this way, the person gives respect, honour, and acceptance to own superior! And is able to maintain a good relation, a healthy relation, with boss or superior.
107 Not to see separately, but as one. The result of this is not being able to respect, honor, and accept.
Some people belong to this category, and, very often, mix up certain things or matters in the wrong way. As a result, they lose the chance to be a little wiser and to improve their own wrong behavior. So, naturally, they experience disturbance in and outside.
108 To give the gift, but for that someone else has to pay! Management play! To get the credit or point through making the other pay out of their own pocket!
To ask someone to buy something and then give that thing to a person to whom the name is suggested by the person who has
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asked. That person has to purchase and pay for the thing, but the giver of the gift is the person who asked for it to be bought.
109 Management of expenses! or expense management.

Today, in MBA or in similar careers, people manage the flow of income and expenses. Very few go further, the next step, that is the expense-flow to manage, in creating a proper mixture of the expenses of others and of ones own, of company or office, and of own or private.
110 Proper use of power, less to spend the money, more to use the material! Attitude to save more, but what? Dont know.
Skill and efficiency in using power shows the expenditure of money is less, means saving is more, and utilization of material is more and more.
111 What is mine is mine, but what is yours is also mine, or we can share it!
Ready to share with others that which belongs to the other! Mine is not possible to share because it is given or provided by the other, so it is not possible to share!
112 To get it done, through giving any suitable reason or name, or cause.
Why is it done? Normally they ask, which is clever, but sometimes shrewd and cunning; gives the suitable and convincing answer through providing proper reason, or cause, etc.
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This is now a stopping Place, a place for review and deep thought over what has been said in these Pointers to a brighter lifestyle, and the first three chapters as a whole. Moving on to the next chapter needs to be undertaken only when it is the right time.
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Chapter Four
Time to change?
A persons lifestyle is naturally related to age: both the period in which they were born, and the physical age of the body. Through both of these time-bound influences, many changes take place. First, we can look at the twentieth century as an example of period: in Britain, the beginning was strongly influenced by Victorian and Edwardian characteristics, such as moral stiffness and hard labor they were difficult times compared to the end of the century, when mostly everyone took washing machines for granted, owned more than one television, a mobile phone, jetted around the world at will, and morality had become more flexible. It is obvious to say that lifestyles during this, and any historical period, would reflect huge changes, primarily, but not exclusively, to the material side of life. Second, with regard to changes in the physical age of the body, these have been of similar characteristics throughout history: childhood, youth, maturity, middle age, and the older (the so-called gray) generation. And again, each period of these brings its own types of lifestyle, they are unavoidable. These traditional lifestyle changes to a persons age are both material and psychological. What all this tells us is that, from external time-bound factors, change can be precipitated by any one or all events, or by none at all. Something else can occur internally regardless of whats going on outside. For example, what is it that triggers the thought that Im feeling this (this being any number of things: this friendship, this way of thinking about him, about her, about this wallpaper). The change of a person manifests inside the way a person lives their life in a unique and special way. We are
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all different from each other, but have commonalities in that we live in the same way, and we all continue to change. This makes it possible to distinguish and differentiate each thought and idea through special features which catch the eye, which draw attention, which attracts us to look, to see, to observe, again and again. Change does not seem to be particularly instigated or influenced by any thing or combination of things. It might be thought that dissatisfaction is the prime mover, but the most satisfied person can change without losing the satisfaction. What we can say is that change occurs in time, and that there is a timing for change, but more than this we cannot say. Nothing in life is ever certain!
The whys and wherefores of change

A complete change is a big step, a major upheaval, but a modification may be big or small. Even after coming to know that change is needed and that its time has come, some people may not have the confidence to enact it, may have no trust in themselves, or be too fearful to proceed. Some people, perhaps they are the lucky ones, dont have these problems and difficulties to overcome, while some realize change is due, but they are knowingly not ready for it and avoid it. Many others live in blissful ignorance of the necessity, and yet others live like ostriches with their heads deeply buried in the sand of avoidance. They just dont know what to do, what is best. We can see that this predicament depends on several factors, which include: Own decisions and actions Fear of decisions Not our own decisions Decisions of others, one group, one purpose Decisions of others, mixed group, mixed purpose
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Proper, improper, right, wrong decisions. The formation of a new lifestyle, or changes and modifications to an existing one, have different proportions of decisions that need to be taken, and these require the person to have sufficient knowledge and information available. For a better life in the future which is the sole objective of changing ones lifestyle what is there to do? One of the first questions which needs to be asked, (and which we have met in Chapter One), is: How can I get to know about my own present lifestyle? And then: How can I bring about change positive change to it? I also need to know when to accept the help of others, and when not. How can I know all this? Very often people first turn to their doctor to advise them on changing their lifestyle. Why is this? Maybe its because some rate highly the lifestyle of particular others, such as doctors, who see a lot of life, and we think they might have some useful knowledge to give. Why do we feel the need to get help from the outside and not from within our very selves? Some people have not yet realized when to do what, but they seem sincere and busy, engaging themselves in one activity after another so as to be able to complete an ideal change or modification to their lifestyle. They might think of themselves as clever to be able to do this; alternatively, they might not even be aware of what they are doing! Sometimes we try to do too much at once and get both success and failure at the same time. Failure can be beneficial as it can make us realize what an idiot we might have been. Its good to know, to realize, that the other side of cleverness exists in us. And we can laugh at it. Why not? When do we show which side of ourselves to the outside? Automatically, the side we choose not to show will be inside. Is it more clever to be outside, and, if so, what will be left inside? What is inside will eventually come to the outside in one form or another it will manifest, of this we can be sure. So, finally, what
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does come to the outside? The most likely answer to this is that its our stupidity, our idiotic side, which will come to the outside. Isnt that so? And it gives us the opportunity to develop our cleverness inside, not just once, but every time we do it. We get another chance through making each mistake. A mistake is not an error; its the only way we can learn. After listening to advice or drawing inspiration from all quarters about the change we want to make, how then to bring about this change inside? We are not planning a cosmetic change we are not planning just to rearrange the same furniture in the same room, so to speak, but to create something much more valuable, to do with growing, to do with becoming much more happy. Many questions remain, but the most important question has been answered: that is, why should I change my lifestyle? Once this question has been answered, it forms the solid foundation, the OK, from the inside. On this, all else can be built. We are convinced that changing is the right thing to do. Our decisions play a vital role in the formation of the new or modified lifestyle, and many other points and pictures are available, which will help and contribute to its formation, to fleshing out what needs to be done.
Whose script is it?

Its a fact that each and every one of us, without exception, has a life script, a real-life story of me. We can discuss until the cows come home whether this script is written as the story unfolds and that the different scenes in the script are of our own making our own invention, creation, initiative, production or whether it is written prior to each scenes performance by some higher source. Perhaps who writes the script is less important at this juncture than coming to a realization that a script of our life exists. If we can see life in this way, as the leading character in a play,
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it will help us to be able also to stand at a little distance from the star of the show and see her or him outside of the spotlight of the performance role, out of the limelight so to speak, and provide one with a clarity and objectivity with which these heartsearching questions can be approached. Continuing with the idea of a script, we can easily accept the allied idea of being able to edit the script, and this can be realized in different directions: for present activities, but also to come to a deeper understanding of the past in terms of how did I get to where I am. Fun can be had with the script by playing with the characters and scenes not changing it out of all proportions but by moving things around so that one can come to a much more realistic understanding of what actually happened: was it what one thought happened, or does this playing reveal new insights both about oneself, other players, or events? With this new or realized knowledge, we will be able to walk ahead in a much stronger position (role), more self-confident and sure, than before. This process can be seen as a purification. One problem! Again, all this self-analysis will take time, and we already have no time in this dizzying world where we have so much equipment, technology, and so forth, designed to give us more time that, as we have described, we find ourselves with not more, but less! We just have to clear away some of the more nicebut-useless parts of our lives in order to make this special time available. Without time for ourselves we cannot proceed. A few sentences earlier, the question of life scripts was raised; more importantly, we can ask: who is the writer (producer, director, set-builder, casting agency, sound engineer, and on and on, are all included in the word writer)? The question again is: do we each write our own scripts develop all the plots and subplots or does someone else? If someone else writes our scripts, who is it, and what is our relationship with them? Answering this question, as can be imagined, could throw a
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mighty big spanner into the works of looking to change or modify the lifestyle. If its not me writing the script, then Im not responsible for it, not to blame, not possible to change. End of story. Not so. Whether we decide that we are simply a player in a much greater story or the writer of ones own story, the show must go on, so to speak. Engaging with further discussion of it now is out of place at this point of our subject and, as it is such a large question, we will return to it. Yes, its outcome could radically change the lifestyle, but first things first life is a fluid progression of events (even though individual events may not be or feel so fluid in themselves) and we need to accept that later we may well decide to change the direction of our lifestyle again. Thats life!
Risks and challenges and timing

All change is unsettling. On one side, it involves risk in terms of fear of loss because some of what one already is must be discarded to make way for the new. This means that the ego is on the defence, not willing to let go easily, not sure what to do, does not see or understand the benefits of making this or that change, and maybe this causes us to get stuck in the mud of indecision. As we are seeing in many areas of our look at lifestyle, the ego, the I-ness or my-ness, plays a most significant role. Play safe it usually cries out, dont do it, dont lose what you have, dont risk, otherwise this or that bad thing will happen. On the other side, although change is unsettling, it is also a challenge, an opportunity for growth. The objective of most change is towards betterment, towards greater happiness, perhaps greater riches of one sort or another. And a challenge such as this can involve excitement, anticipation, stretching of our capabilities. It can also involve greater humility. Again, here the ego comes into play because if the challenge is met and we are successful, then we can say, I have avoided the
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risk and gained, I have won the game, I am clever! There is a natural lead in from the question of accepting a risk or a challenge to the question of timing. The actor or singer, for example, must always perform at exactly the right time otherwise the play or song wont make sense, will be discordant, and will not be applauded. Has our action been played too soon, too early, too spontaneously, or has one not looked before leaping; or the opposite, is what was done too late, has one missed the boat, been too slow off the mark, half asleep to how one is; or was the timing just right? Looking at the timing of risk or challenges, these in turn depend on many factors. Younger people live at a much faster speed than do the older in the fast lane with fast cars, fast food, fast everything, as opposed to the slow lane, older cars, out of date computers, staid clothes, fuddy-duddy! Its always been this way, only the degrees of speed have changed which is, in reality, meaningless to the risks or challenges themselves. Yet this is not an either or situation, we may not have to risk and face all the fear and anxiety and we may not need to extend ourselves, to be challenged, in order to make a worthwhile change to the lifestyle. There is a middle way, which is a considered way, a gentle way, a moderate way, where all is always in balance, and where the outcome is always (well, mostly) assured. The risk here is minimal and acceptable, the challenge always within our capabilities. And with regard to timing, there is also a middle way where a much more measured approach is taken towards any change which has been found is necessary to make no rush, but no sleeping either, a balanced speed with which everything can be handled with composure. Nevertheless, this middle way need not be middle of the road, which is boring, unadventurous, stuck. The middle way entails a thoughtful approach to change (like the one described above),
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one in which considered preparation is vital, just as in what has to be completed before a long journey or a long walk, which we know will be enjoyed much more with the right equipment, clothing, boots, and so forth. The middle way is where all the anticipated obstacles and dangers, possible prizes and winning, have been thought through thus making the passage to change as safe as possible yet still challenging, still a little risky, where one has measured out what can realistically be achieved and added a bit more to stretch the achievement, where room is left for mistakes and correction. Where the timing is set just right, not making change a race, but also neither a saunter. The middle way is equilibrium and equanimity, without fire or torpor, but without losing sight of the actions which are desired to take, the game one wants to play.
Where is the goal

We have said what the goal is. It is happiness. So where can it be found? We can take it that there isnt enough of it, otherwise one wouldnt be reading this. The questions where is it and what is it are a little similar, or at least have some commonalities. That it has not yet been found means it cannot be found in the present lifestyle, although it may partially be there. Now we must ask ourselves more questions to narrow down the area of our search in order to complete the list. Is it or could it be found in the relationship with a partner? No. It may be there some of the time but not all; it may have been or is there in the beginning, but the gloss wears off in all relationships, and they end in compromise: happiness can be there some of the time but is always dependent on outside factors. Its never under our compete control; there is always something missing. Is it or could it be found in the relationship with ones children? No. Having children can be a wonderful and joyful experience, but it isnt like this all of the time: it can be exasper87
ating, miserable, a drudge, and very much more. We are rarely in control, and then they leave home to find their own way in life, leaving an emptiness, flatness, but probably also some relief. Some may never have enjoyed a partnership with another person, nor had children, but nevertheless are likely to have had meaningful relationships where there has been a search for happiness. Control is an important factor in both of these examples. Where in a life can one have total control? Cutting across many other examples of where in the life one has searched for or built the framework for happiness to occur, the answer must be where no other person is involved, as people each have their own agenda, too. What we are implying here is not that one needs to exclude all people in the change to a new lifestyle; on the contrary, all relationships can stay in place, if it is so wished, once it is established what the new lifestyle will be. The nub of the whole matter revolves around each of us and our search for a secret garden, wherein only we can tread, wherein only we can have influence, and where external influences even lifes worse gifts will not touch us. This place, therefore, will only be found within. This summation has to be faced if there is to be any chance of finding full happiness, otherwise changing the lifestyle will be just shifting the existing furniture around, as we described earlier, there will be no real change. The question to ask is a simple one, but one that has hidden depths. It is so deep, in fact, that in asking it one can reach the very ultimate. The question is, Who am I?
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Chapter Five
Transition and the Prize

The start to moving into Chapter Five needs to be undertaken when ready, when we have come to know ourselves as fully as we think we can in the way outlined earlier. What is now to be talked about represents a marked change to how we have talked in the foregoing pages, both in style and content, because from here onwards, we are looking towards the best lifestyle direction that could possibly be taken. The word best is emotive, the reason for this will become apparent. If this chapter is started out of idle curiosity, it is the wrong reason: return to carry through the work stipulated from the beginning again, or give up, close this book and turn to read something else. The only reason to read on is because, in the deliberation, we have come to the conclusion that there is more to life than just the physical and mental body that has been described. If we are perfectly happy with how things are, believing strongly and fully that this (the physical and mental) is all there is, and we are content with this, there is no need read any further. What is meant by more to life than just the physical and mental? There might be heard a groan from some readers who have jumped the gun and immediately imagined something along the lines of, Oh no, were going into some religious mumbo-jumbo; Ive heard it all before; switch off, pack up, and go home! Well, do so if it is wished, but closing this book now with this thought would be out of ignorance. The purpose in the remainder of this book is to establish that there is something more than the physical and mental to our
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lives, also to establish that this something is not dependent on the existence of some particular religious idea or the other. What is more, it is of no concern to what we will say here whether a belief in, or affiliation to, any religious idea is held. What we will say approaches undeniable truths without attacking or otherwise destroying any religious idea it is not our intention to be in conflict, but it is our intention to bring to life these truths in order that, if it is required, a change or modification to the lifestyle can be made in whichever way it is seen fit. If in the end, it is found that the ideas which rule ones life prove to be unreal, it means that the life which has been lived so far has been based on false premises, and so it will be a natural transition to make a change. To live a false life thinking it to be a really real one is the height of blindness or ignorance! We have said that many people find it is comfortable to live this way: no need to change anything, everythings just OK as it is, why bother to upset it all, as one way is just the same as another. Not so! The answer, the reason to change the prize is simply: greatest happiness. This is the sublime truth of life. What better reason could there be to make change worthwhile? Its very easy to say greatest happiness and move on to the next words without working out what might be meant. There is a disadvantage straight away because greatest happiness cannot be described in words and, indeed, happiness may not be the most accurate word to use. However, happiness is a word everyone knows something about, that everyone has experienced at least to some degree, so it suits our purposes to use it here. Greatest happiness is a rarefied experience, the greatest prize that life can bestow; it is the most desirable state, yet many people settle for less and become moderately happy (with its concomitant moderate unhappiness). The reason that they settle for less is because although they might intuitively know, or know in theory, that the greatest happiness exists and can be found, they dont know how to find it.
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One way to approach trying to establish what cannot be established in words is to say what this happiness isnt. Sages have been telling us for centuries, and our own experiences bear testimony to the fact, that human life is a misery, it is full of sorrow and suffering birth, growth, and death are painful; what is owned deteriorates and is lost; relationships always end there is no end to the list. Some may say that this is an overstatement, that life isnt all that bad, that it has its ups and downs and we have to enjoy the ups and bear the weight of the downs. This, again, is blindness and ignorance. Yes, life does have its pleasures, but the universal characteristic of these pleasures is that they start and finish: with each pleasure there always comes loss and end, and then a new pleasure has to be sought. Each and every time. One thing can be definitely said: this happiness exists, it is not pie in the sky, and it is available to all without exception. In fact, it is nothing new, what has happened is that it has become obscured by living the life described in the previous chapters. Joy is what knowledge of this happiness brings. A taste of greatest happiness can already be savored simply by the thought of it! Greatest happiness is an end to misery, sorrow, and suffering. Not just once, but for always. Does this sound too good to be true? There has to be a catch somewhere, a price to be paid. Yes, there is a price to be paid, but in comparison, it is not a high price: it is giving up the acceptance we always make of misery, sorrow, and suffering. It is known that there are five human afflictions ignorance, attachment, Iness, liking and disliking, and fear of death and dying out of which all our miseries come, and all these must reduce and disappear, be overcome, to give room for happiness to flourish. The greatest happiness cannot be found in a relationship with another person; it cannot be found by any form of imbibing through any sense organ. All this rules out practically everything in our lives! What it doesnt rule out is each one of us, which
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means that the greatest happiness the sublime truth can only be found within the individual. This might seem an obvious thing to say, but sometimes the obvious passes us by, remaining unnoticed. If I have it, where is it and how do I reach it and enjoy it? The answer to this will be talked about in the following pages, but one thing has to be said here concerning the notion of selfishness. If the greatest happiness can only be experienced by me, what about those that are dear to me, whom I want to share the experience with? And how can I be this happy while others arent? We have mentioned the fact that it is only me who can live my life; no-one else can get much more than an inkling of what my life is, and neither me theirs. This means that the idea of selfishness in this context is unfounded if I cant live my life to the full, whats the point of living it? This also means that greatest happiness implies living life to the full, in fact not just full but to the fullest of full then a wonderful life is possible to be had. And a bonus is that this happiness will, in any case, spread to others; it cannot be stopped, its automatic. More will be said about this happiness as we proceed it is the sole objective, the sole prize, nothing else will do. The truth we will talk about is not a new truth, not a secret truth, not an unknown truth. Sometimes this truth has mystified, has not been described in a way that can be clearly understood. It is our intention to portray this truth in such a clear and understandable way that deployment of it into our lives will be straightforward and natural. There is one truth which is all-encompassing, which itself is beautifully simple yet, as we have said, is not so easy to fully understand because of its simplicity. From this one truth, all else emerges. Adoption of this truth into our lives will have no less than a transforming effect.
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Chapter Six
We are tantalizingly close, but there has to be a pause once more. This is essential preparation for what is to come, and it involves a further look into Who I am. It might be said that we have done all the looking as far as it can be done. In fact, one might say, Im sick of this navel gazing and want to get to the nub of the matter as soon as it is possible. To do what? To move onto the next life event without significant and lasting impact being made here? What a waste of time! Again, pack up, go home, switch on the television, stay there. Its no wonder that few people make it to the prize. By now we have found our life to be much more multi-faceted (complex, even complicated and confused perhaps) than we ever thought is there no end to the depths of me that can be found? To go some way to answering this question we must move in what may appear to be a sideways shift, but in fact isnt, as will become clear. What we want to do is look directly at what is going on in the mind right now. The answer will usually be lots of things, and this is what well look at. What are these lots of things? Thats the point. In all minds everywhere, there are lots of goings on, and in previous chapters we have identified the mind with its four basic parts: senses, memory, intellect, and I-ness. Theyre all active, but the activities rise and fall just like waves waves of water, waves of wind flow, waves of thoughts. Just watching a tree will demonstrate what is meant. Is the tree ever still? The gentlest breeze rustles its leaves, while stronger wind makes it bend, sometimes almost to breaking point before it might swing back. Some trees are uprooted because of this force. The analogy of the tree is just one example. If we consider other examples, we will discover the same phenomenon. The sea nearly always has waves, but on certain very still days the seas
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surface is like a mirror. Not a ripple disturbs it (just like at the still of night when there is no breeze and the tree is silent). The sea is always moving with currents, cross-currents, eddies and so forth, with waves to match in size from a gentle swell to a tsunami. Even in the inanimate such as a car, the engine will accelerate, decelerate, or idle, all at different speeds. Waves of motion and commotion occur ceaselessly throughout the gross world. And what occurs in the subtle world, our minds? Its the same. Waves of sensations such as heat and cold, pain, seeing, hearing, and the rest. Movement. Emotions such as love, anger, hunger, liking and disliking, desires. Everything comes in waves in our lives, in the world. Incessantly. Perhaps only in the dead of night in deep, dreamless sleep are we at our quietest, our most still, but the heart continues beating, we breathe there may be no thoughts, but life (waves) continues. Whether its a tree moving, a car, a thought, or a finger, they all have one thing in common: nothing is still for long in life. Or is this the case? We can ask, What is the difference in the varieties of movement? In response another question surfaces, Is there a difference? Are all the waves simply different manifestations (forms and varieties) of the same energy? Another analogy may help to provide a way to find an answer. In the kitchen there are many appliances food mixer, washing machine, refrigerator, toaster, radio, lights, and so forth all different forms of movement, but they are all powered by one energy: electricity (which also comes in waves). Does this mean that there is an interconnectivity between all waves no matter what type, that they are all manifestations of one energy of which there are variable ebbs and flows, seemingly being born and dying but, nevertheless and paradoxically, never ending? Am I like this? Lets look a little closer. What needs to occur, whats involved, to create a wave in the sea? Were no oceanographers, but its plain to see that wind is an influence, so what creates wind? The
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answer is mostly heating and cooling by the sun. Gravitational pull by the moon, too, plays a big part in wave production. All this means that the seas waves are created by an energy which is not bound to Planet Earth; and theres no reason not to suppose, and no physical evidence to show otherwise, that the same phenomenon pervades the entire Universe, that it is throughout space. Energy cannot exist nowhere (such a place cannot exist) as it needs particles to manifest itself, to play with, which means that we can presume energy exists always in space. And because in space is the entire universe, so space enables energy to be throughout the universe, too. But how can this relate to the waves of energy which seem to drive this body its muscles and thoughts? First, muscles are a part of the body, which is a complex machine, made, originally, by the meeting of a spermatozoa and egg in the mothers womb. Golly, do we have to go that far back? The answer is yes, and further back through the generations to where we come to understand clearly that these waves have no beginning or end, although individually they do begin and end (just as the waves in the sea rise and fall). Second, what about waves of thoughts? Our experience tells us clearly that there is an intimate connection between thoughts and physical activity. Hold a finger over a lighted candle and the thought will very soon arise to withdraw the hand fast! There are countless examples. Can there be two distinct waves of energy involved or just one? Is the mind distinct from the physical? The answer seems to be both yes and no: yes because there is a tangible difference between the mind and the physical, and no because one doesnt operate successfully (or at all) without the other. Can energy be explained further? We can look into the ins and outs of various energies ad infinitum, but this is unlikely to tell anything new about energy itself. The answer to the question seems to be no, energy cannot be explained further, at least not
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in communicable words. The source or origin or driving force of energy may well be found in our normal everyday experience because there seems to be a strong link between energy and what we call consciousness, that which enlivens our thoughts. We know through our experience that both energy and consciousness exist; we know much more about energy than consciousness (at least we think we do!). We can ask: are they two or one, one of many dual events or two aspects of a single event? A question was asked earlier in this chapter whether anything was still for long in life. No response was given at that time. Now we have seen more about the nature of energy, and introduced a possible link with consciousness, we can consider this more. To answer this, we must put aside thoughts of physical movement for the time being because its plain to see that the world is unlikely ever to stop rotating (or tilting) as it does in three directions all the time; and that the Universe will always involve movement of one sort or another; which of course is saying that gross forms of energy, where they exist, will never cease. Is this the same with subtle forms? The answer to this is to question whether it is possible to stop the waves of thoughts which constantly flow in and through the mind. Ancient wisdom tells us that it is possible (for example, it is the objective of Yoga), but this state, if achieved, may only be temporary. Whether measurable brain activity, such as for someone in a coma, are thoughts or not cannot be definitely assumed, but such evidence as there is about normal brain activity tells us that thoughts are unlikely to be completely stopped for any long periods of time. Rather, sages tell us of not noticing thoughts, not becoming attached to them, thereby preventing their normal multiplication. In the move to a new lifestyle, we are looking for an answer to the question: Who am I? Is there an answer to this question? To proceed, we need to look at what is being asked clearly. We have identified the mind is comprised of four parts, and it is certain that I cannot be the first three, the senses, intellect, and memory.
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These are simply tools. It is the fourth part, the ego, I-ness, where the solution must lie, if anywhere. It is the I which must ask the question and seek liberation from the ego. The I must let go. But of what? Of itself? This would mean, if successful, that the I would have to let go of the I. Yet we are left with the I intact, left where we started out, full of I-ness! What to do? This I is a flibbertigibbet, an inconsequential, yet ever-so self-important, ever-so busy, illusion it actually has no reality and we are deluded by it into thinking I am something substantial, something special. Am I really? And what has this to do with the energy we have been talking about. It is energy which provides the impetus for all our activities, our doership, for the thought that this inconsequential, yet seemingly important, I is actually doing something. Energy is just energy, it provides the wave-power for such thoughts, its not a personal energy, not my energy, its just energy, and the ego assumes ownership of it just the same as an invading force takes control of a country: finders keepers, I am the doer, I did all this, I am the boss. We get carried away by the story, it feels so real, but its pure fiction captivatingly so. What we have established so far is that, in reality, this I cannot be and do what it thinks it does. Now, two options: first something can be done about it, or second we can accept the illusion, the lack of substance, as real and stay in ignorance. Oddly this decision is not an easy one to make. What are the alternatives? There has to be a way forward in which the life is not dominated by this pervasive I. So again we must ask the question: What, where and who is this I? Is there an answer? Already this is the wrong approach, because if an answer is sought, it must be the imperial I that is doing the asking. Is the solution to do nothing? Getting closer. To do nothing is to start to accept that the I is no longer what one thought it was. It is not this apparently powerful personality. And if this is the case, there must be something else that is me, which isnt me
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(isnt this personality), so to speak! Because I (for want of another word) am not nothing: this entity of body and mind exists, the world and Universe exist. At least I think this is the case. We are looking for the prize. We have seen as much of what we thought was me as we can, for the moment.
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Chapter Seven
Truth
Finding the truth about ourselves must be the most important activity in our lives: without truth there is only untruth. Can we live our lives not knowing the truth of who we really are? Most people do, and this is because they find the truth unpalatable and prefer to remain in ignorance, living an unstable lifestyle, living with incomplete knowledge about themselves, not fully happy. Truth is sometimes hard to swallow, but what we will talk about is no bitter pill. On the contrary, it can be a great release from the bondage of ignorance, an ending of the anxiety of not knowing and, in this case, a revelation about who I am. In this chapter we describe this truth. We have said that it is a simple truth, but it is one with a depth which is not completely fathomable, and the reason why will become apparent as we proceed.
One
ONE. A simple little word. What is so special about One? The answer is that everything in the Universe is in One. The Universe itself is in One. There is nothing but One. All is part of One, but One has no parts. This One is not God, it is beyond any such notions. So, what is this One, and what has the prize we have spoken about to do with it? We must unravel this puzzle. When I think about myself, I think of just one person. I am not more than one; I have only one body and only one mind, although the way my thoughts are may make it sometimes seem as if it is more than one! Each person is exactly the same. When I empty away my thoughts as much as I can and
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become very quiet, I am left with the experience of two characteristics that comprise the root of me, the essential me: the first is that I exist, and the second is that I am aware that I exist. Now, using different words to say the same thing to make this as clear as possible, the experience is: I am, and I am conscious of the fact that I am. Again, every person is exactly the same. When I think further about these two characteristics, I find that I am left with the conclusion that these two are not separate. This conclusion can be voiced sensibly as: I cannot exist unless I know that I do. Now, this can also be voiced the other way around to again make it as clear as possible, as: I cannot know anything which doesnt have existence. It is apparent, therefore, that these two findings (we can also call them being and awareness), cannot ever be two separate characteristics, but are necessarily two characteristics of the same thing: One. This One has no name, it is not of any particular shape, no direct thoughts can be had about it, and there are no words that we can use to describe it (which means that its indescribability can only be talked about indirectly): it is ineffable. One simply is. We can look a little more deeply at this apparent conundrum regarding One. In the first place, it is nonsensical to say that existence doesnt exist, or that there are some places or things which do not exist. Everywhere has existence. Everything has existence. Even for something not to exist, its non-existence has to exist in the first place! Existence is a single quality as it is plain to see and experience: we all have it otherwise we wouldnt exist! To put this in another way and to go one step further, we can say that all things have differences (for example, in size, shape, or colour), yet they also have one thing in common: the fact that they all exist. We have also said that existence and consciousness, or energy, are One together, which has to mean that all things which exist have the same consciousness, the same energy. We found this in the previous chapter. What are the ramifications of this two-in-one situation?
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Taking our analysis another step further, it means that all sentient beings (animals, fish, microbes) have the same existence and consciousness/energy as people, as me. Taking a third step, this must also mean that all insentient things have the same existence and consciousness/energy as well. This includes the kitchen table, Mount Everest, the planets and stars, and whatever else might be beyond the far reaches of space. And were not just talking of the material, physical, and visible things either. Principally, this means my thoughts (and dreams, too) must have existence and consciousness/energy like everything else. Is this far-fetched, some sort of science fiction? How can the kitchen table have consciousness like me? The answer is that we may have imagined all consciousness is the same as human consciousness, or that only humans have consciousness, but this is not the case. All through Nature, consciousness is of different variations on the one theme, so to speak, and all variations, at base, have the same characteristic, which is either enlivened or latent in other words, actual or potential, manifest or unmanifest because, as we have said, there cannot be existence without existence, and existence always exists with consciousness/energy. Existence and consciousness are just words, and words cannot convey the true experience of what something is actually like. Can one describe the taste of a mango in words? No. To know existence and consciousness, they have to be experienced, and this experience happens to us all of the time, without a break. It is our normality, and so we should be able to get to understand it completely, as completely and in the same way as we know the taste of the mango. So far, we have talked about two characteristics of the One, but there is a final third characteristic which we mentioned earlier as the prize which can be brought into the lifestyle, to
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make it complete. This third part is total and absolute greatest happiness. How does this come about? By putting worldly thoughts in abeyance, by putting all daily events and other distractions to one side, the current lifestyle, only the experience of existence and consciousness remains, and this is in just the same way that, when we concentrate, we can experience nothing other than the taste of the mango. And because there is no disturbance (no thoughts), and therefore no sorrow or misery, no afflictions, as we described in an earlier chapter, there is the experience of complete and oceanic happiness. In fact, because there is no object in the happiness (which is usually the case as, for example, with the other person in a relationship), this happiness is frequently referred to as bliss, which is a wholly subjective experience. Bliss is the experience of unalloyed existence and consciousness/energy. It exists fully all of the time but can get completely obscured by all of lifes zillions of distractions. Bliss is the prize of life, it is the utmost happiness that life can bring. There is nothing better, ever. Yet to experience it does not mean that all of the rest of our lives need be forsaken husbands, wives, children, possessions, and all the rest that is decided to keep can stay. What needs to occur is a totally new way of approaching how we live our lives, a totally new lifestyle! This new lifestyle is not unachievable, not beyond what we can do it is already in our grasp, already there for the taking, if we have a little courage and self-determination.
Realizing One
Whether we know it or not, it is everybodys ambition and dream to realize One, and all people spend all of their lives in their attempt. Of course, people have different ideas of what One is, and so follow different paths, yet all such paths tread in a single direction. On the one extreme, the path is soaked in earthly pleasures; on the other, the path is one of total renunciation of the
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earthly pleasures, but the single direction all follow (mostly somewhere in the middle between the two extremes) is towards that of greatest happiness. There are as many paths and means to this prize as there are people. It is not possible to estimate how many people reach fulfilment of their ambition, but we can see that on the path soaked wholly in earthly pleasures (together with their inescapable miseries) achievement of greatest happiness is impossible to get. The reward for these people is mundane happiness, and many are satisfied with this as they either mistake the mundane for greatest happiness, or are satisfied with something they know to be second best. Many and probably most people who reach fulfilment following a path of total renunciation remain unknown, vanishing in the obscurity of enjoying their greatest happiness, but there are notable exceptions of people rescued from their happy obscurity. These people stand as icons to the truth of greatest happiness. History is sprinkled with them. Renunciation is a very loaded word echoing of sackcloth and ashes and a hard life, but it is not this at all. Nothing has to be given up to experience greatest happiness, unless it is desired to be so; standing apart from our society will not guarantee that our ambition is realized and the prize won. Something else is entailed. Logic has it that there is no such thing as realization; and the word realization is used here to incorporate all ideas (religious or otherwise) regarding the highest state to be gained in life. This is simply because we can ask how it is possible to realize something and by realize we also mean obtain something that one does not yet have when we already have it. One (existence, consciousness, and bliss) is present at all times, in all places, and in all people, but we become so lost, so distracted by lifes bright lights, or so stuck in our present lifestyle, that we cannot see the wood for the trees, so to speak, and dont realize greatest
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happiness is so readily available. It is not our intention here to give the impression that greatest happiness is easy to experience, but neither do we want to imply that it is too difficult. This might sound enigmatic. As we have said, the way to One is the quietening of the mind, which entails bringing an end to the power and influence of I-ness, and this has been described as the most difficult of all human tasks. And yet this dissolution has been demonstrated to come about without effort! What we can say is that to achieve greatest happiness, our sights need to be set on it wholeheartedly, and this wholeheartedness has to be fully comprehensive. When our sights are so set, then is the time we will know what there is to be done, if anything. It is a matter of getting to the starting blocks as if in a race, but in fact there is likely to be no race to run. We have said that each means to clear away the rubble obscuring One is different. It is not our intention here to create some sort of self-help manual which can be followed. Each person must find their own way, just as if one is lost and needs to find the way home. We usually do find our way home because the desire to reach the safety and comfort of it is very strong. Something similar is required in working our way towards One.
One, not Two

One is One, not two or many. There cannot be any other than One because, if, for example, there were two, they could not be absolutely One, there would be room for a better than two, which can only be One. Anything other than One, as we will see below and in the following chapter, is less than One. One is absolute, less than One is relative. Absolute is as the word describes, there is nothing other than One. However, in the relative, there are countless variations. Relative is how we know the world to be: each individual aspect is relative to another, every individual person is relative to another person, every lifestyle without exception is relative to another in One there is
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no individuality, no place for I. Although it might sound it, it is not confusing to say that there can be One if there are two, but there cannot be two if there is One. One always is, two come and go. One never changes, two always change. This means, evaluatively, that One is better than two: it is completely certain, always existing; two is not certain, not always existing. If there are two, it means that each part of the two is dependent on the other. In life, this can mean, for example, that if I am dependent on someone or something else, then I am not free, but bound and restricted to that other and also subject to the five afflictions we have mentioned of ignorance, attachment, Iness, aversion, and fear of death and dying. From these, all miseries, all suffering, emanate ceaselessly. In One, nothing dies, and nothing is born. One always is, unchanging. It is only in two where change happens. But I was born, and I will die. No! Only the body is born and only the body will die, and we have already looked at the fact that I am not this body of blood and sinews which goes rotten soon enough and is the home of maggots. Greatest happiness cannot change, cannot waver. One exists outside of time where there is no pain of birth, dying, and death. It is the I which has this thought, and without the I-thought, where is the pain of it all? Who is this I? It is clear to see that holding to One will bring greatest happiness, holding to more than One will bring only relative happiness, incomplete happiness.
Desire
All desires bar one lead to bondage and misery, and are what our lives and lifestyles primarily comprise in various forms. Desire for One is the only desire which will lead to greatest happiness. In One, there can be no such thing as bondage nor freedom, nor
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afflictions as One contains nothing but itself, the characteristics of existence, consciousness, and bliss. Some people might object and say something along the lines of, It sounds to me that this One is not very appealing at all: its dull, has no excitement, no fun, no colour, no activity, no passion, no variety, in fact it has nothing worth having. Two is better than One! This is maybe how a person can feel about One, but it is precisely this type of sentiment which is binding, which pins us with a very pervasive and sticky glue to the world, to relativity and misery. Such sentiment prevents change and growth, and the lifestyle stagnates. Desire is the driving force of individuality, of I want, I want, I want. Yet, when I get what I want and am satisfied, it is not long before the satisfaction wears thin and the I want starts its familiar song again. Over and over. One always exists, but it can become obscured by two, which fluctuates between its many varieties, fuelled by desire. Emotively, we can say that desire is the death of One.
One Is
This is the only complete and comprehensive statement which can be made about One. It says all that there is to say, nothing is left out. And then the talking begins (usually with words like but, why, how and the rest) because our minds cannot usually contemplate such brevity! The first words which are used, we have discussed: the characteristics of One are that it exists, is aware that it exists, and it is bliss. We might try to add two more words. First, One is here; second, that it is now. This can be said as, One is always everywhere. However, One entertains no concepts, so those of time and place are inappropriate. A description of the experience of One has been given as that
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it is similar to deep, dreamless sleep (which we enjoy every night), but while we are awake, and brought about by replacing the normal time-bound, busy, distracting waking experience. Another description of the experience of One is of silence. First, there is the silence as in sound and silence, this silence being the gap between two sounds, therefore relative to the gap; but there is another silence, so deep and intense that it might be called solid silence and, seemingly a paradox, it contains all sounds and relative silences. This silence is absolute silence. It is One. We said earlier that it is not normally possible to experience the whole of One. This is because only One can experience One as One.
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Chapter Eight
Two
In a previous section, we have said that One is two, but two is not One. It is this statement which opens the floodgates, which lets the whole world in: One is two. If One is always everywhere, then it must also permeate every aspect of two the absolute must permeate the relative, but not vice versa. We have also said that the complete, unalloyed experience of One (non-duality) might be rare. However, the experience of two (duality or incompleteness) is common to all, and it is in duality that glimpses or longer contact of One can occur when, through seeing, the varieties of two become less obscuring. The prize of greatest happiness is no less, it cannot change, but its greatness is diffused. Nevertheless, access to One is always through two, where we are. In two is everything; there is no part of two where there is no thing: two is completely comprised of things (people, carrots, thoughts, cars) which are all relative to something, not least that they all have dependence. And whereas the characteristic of One is unchanging permanence, the characteristic of two is that, without exception, everything is changing impermanence. Does this ring any bells? Hence, qualitatively, One sounds a lot more worth having than two, yet the vast majority of us opt for two rather than One. Does this make any sense? In two, the simplicity of One has been replaced by complex systems which are held together by ignorance or incomplete knowledge of the whole truth, of One. These systems appear selfperpetuating, an endlessness of confusion and untruths, a tangled web from which escape seems impossible. But, as we have seen, it is not!
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Another way of describing the difference between One and two is in the difference between subject and object. One is wholly subject and independent, whereas two is dependent on the relationship of the subject and its object. For example, me and mine, I see you, I feel pain, I have a lollipop the whole world is the duality between me (I-ness) and something other than me, without exception. To be completely correct, One is not just subject; it is beyond the duality of subject and object because, as we have explained, it is completely impervious to any influence or changeability such as the dichotomy between the subject and its object. This can be explained through a tripartite (threeness): I know (the subject) this tomato (the object); once I know the object (the known), in this scenario both subject and object disappear as the interaction is complete (the tomato is now known) and what is left is the third aspect, simply knowing or awareness this is One. It can now be seen just what we meant when we said earlier that the beautiful simplicity of One is apparently destroyed by the complexity of two. This is a further reason for the lifestyle to be changed or re-directed to One. In simplicity, there is peace and calm. In multiplicity, there is chaos and storm. Again we say, can there be any question as to what is the ideal life? Its just getting to that desired point which appears so difficult, to extricate ourselves from this tangled web of relative existence, this (seeming) diabolical I-ness. Sages appear unanimous that this way is the best and only way to live. They also tell us that the approach to it is not to be rushed; on the contrary, progress is little by little, which means continual improvement, a continual increase of happiness. Greatest happiness is unlimited, which means that one never finds its end (otherwise it would be limited happiness), and it also means that when we are completely happy we can know that there is even still more to come. What a wonder!
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We have said that the I-ness seems to be diabolical. Yes, it is when viewed from the relative position, from two-ness where it ties us in such a tangle, which seems totally impossible to untangle. However, from the absolute position, the pure I (the I without individuality), there is no life tangle life is uncluttered, beautifully simple, joyous, completely full, far outshining relative happiness, which evaporates in its wake like the morning mist, leaving complete clarity. By using this kind of language we are in danger of ending up in poetry, which is not our intention; it demonstrates the impossibility of words to describe One. Quite soon in the adoption of a new lifestyle in the direction away from two and towards One, we will begin to experience a newness, a brightness, and more happiness deep inside this is certain. This is not an idle hope, but a knowledge based on experience.
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Chapter Nine
Vision
In the first chapter, after describing what we meant when we used the word lifestyle, we introduced the idea that change or modification is possible. In the second chapter, we then looked at getting to fully know ourselves so that we might see whether some change was due or not. After studying ourselves in the way proposed, there will be a conclusion of yes, no, or maybe regarding change, and perhaps it will also contain an inkling of how much is needed. Many pointers to lifestyle development and growth were then given, and these were designed to stretch the thinking in the light of earlier conclusions, or even revise them. A discussion about when to change and how, and the risks and challenges involved, concluded thinking about each of us as we are. A chapter entitled transition formed the bridge between a miserable person and a potentially happier person. Mostly, of course, we hadnt thought of ourselves as miserable; this is a strong word to use to describe the human situation: perhaps moderately happy is how we felt, accepting lifes sufferings, pushing them under the carpet, so to speak, in an attempt to reduce their importance and the feelings we have about them. It was said that this acceptance is detrimental to ones life because it holds us back from something much better in all respects: lifes supreme prize of greatest happiness, attainable here and now, by each of us. Some depth as to what this is, we have seen. Then the fact of One was introduced. Permanence is a succinct way to describe One. Happiness doesnt change if it is permanent, but if impermanent, there is change and the concomitant misery. One has the characteristics of existence,
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awareness, and bliss; these are simply inadequate words used to say that One does not have the opposite characteristics, such as non-existence and suffering. One is greatest happiness. To be realistic, it was stated that One could not be approached from anything but a dual position (two), that permanence has to be approached through impermanence, from where we are. Nevertheless, it was also stated that although this was the case, it did not mean that One was something new to be gained, because two is in One. The work to be done to get greater and greater experience of permanent happiness is wholly achieved by shifting the balance in our life from two to One. This isnt a book which will now give a specific way that needs to be followed to reach the prize. There isnt one, but many. Or rather, there is just one path, and this is the one each will tread. Its our path. It is whichever lifestyle we choose to live. We can choose to go for it aiming directly at the prize; or choose to aim indirectly for a part of the prize; or we can choose a much lesser prize, or even no prize at all. The choice is wholly that of each person: how much happiness there is in our lives is entirely up to us. We have implied that there are as many variations for working towards a happier life as there are people. There is also a plethora of guidance which can be used to help walk the path. It doesnt matter so much which is chosen. What is important is to know that tried and tested guides and guidelines based on the knowledge of One exist and can be used to move forward, and then discarded when their job is done. One is not pie in the sky, so to speak. The most important person in all of this is each one of us. It is our greatest happiness that is being worked towards, no-one elses. Each of us has an insightful capability to find the way to the source of happiness if we wish to use it and listen to what it says and this is through intuition: the certain knowledge that something is right, even though rationally whatever is being felt
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might sound crazy or off-track. So, what is being proposed is not a particular path to be followed, but that a change to ones lifestyle in the direction which has been pointed to will bring increasing and unlimited happiness. What has been shown is that this happiness will not be found in the mundane world but, paradoxically, we will never leave the mundane because the absolute the permanence is the heart of the mundane! There is not necessarily any need to leave a partner, to forego many of lifes pleasures, and to live away from the world, what is needed is a new vision: a new understanding about the truth of life, what it can and cannot provide, what it is and what it is not.
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Chapter 10
Health Warning
In and through all the aforesaid, one might think that in finding greatest happiness, total happiness, it would be available without any problems. Oddly this may not be the case. Is this strange? Is it de-motivating? We need to look at this occurrence in greater depth to find out. Certainly, greatest happiness is unblemished. Its as simple as that. If it were blemished in any respect it would not be perfect. It is clear to see and, once seen, its not difficult to experience the absolute joy that there is in this perfection because it is natural. So how come we are saying that there appears to be cracks in the perfection? The answer is because there still can remain there is likely to remain a duality. As might be guessed, this duality is between the perfection and the I-ness, the me-ness. Yet there is no need or necessity for me to die a physical death to experience perfect happiness, and this is the nub of the matter. Perfect happiness exists always, the I exists temporarily, just for this life, or it appears to. And it is this temporality of the I which is the problem. Over the centuries, wise folk have told us that the I, the me-ness, has to die to experience perfect happiness in its plenitude. Then who is it that wakes up every morning, gets washed, goes to work, and so forth? Is it me, or is it perfect happiness, or is it both? How can this situation find some balance, or is this the wrong question? It stands to reason that if the I still has its old sense of separateness, then there will be a conflict: the conflict which, at base, can be summed up by the question, whos in charge, which
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of the two calls the shots, so to speak? If there is this type of conflict, then it can never be resolved because the two in their full form cannot coexist. One has to (appear to) give way, stand aside, or have the greater or more vociferous voice superimposed on it. Perfect happiness simply smiles, it is not a fighter, not a competitor, because the truth that we have described in earlier chapters is that the Truth is completely unassailable. It has no concerns. It doesnt have to get up in the morning, and so forth, as we have described, because it is everywhere at all times and beyond space and time. So what can happen? It is that the I does not give up so easily. It has a box full of tricks: it can make us as happy as perfect happiness, but only temporarily; it can make us inexplicably ill with all sorts of illogical ailments, causing untold stresses on the body; it can make us sad or depressed by causing unhappy events through generating anger, frustrations, lust, greed, or chemical imbalances within the body there is no end to this list! And it is because of these events (which can appear without apparent reason and hit us below the belt, so to speak) that we can feel defeated by the weight of the box of tricks the I has. Illogical as it may seem, we can so easily give up perfect happiness and accept the I as supreme, and be comfortable. And not change the lifestyle. Sure. And carry on with the old way of thinking that it is me who gets up in the morning and lives each day. And be fooled, and be foolish. Lost in the dross of living. Thats our health warning!
Whose I is it?
Is this I that I have mine? How can it be so? It existed before thoughts started, before language which is what all thoughts predominantly are was learned. From the moment of birth, this I existed, before that, too, in the womb, in the fetes. Where did it start? The answer is that it always exists, and we have adopted, even stolen, the universal I to use for our own benefit, to create
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an apparent uniqueness, which is called me. And this me lives right through its life with this delusion, this lie. Fear is the prime cause because, without the I, then who am I? If this cannot be answered correctly, then we are lost, we stick to the same lifestyle and, at the end, die happily. We die without experiencing real happiness, unending happiness. We need to know that all fear is based on the error of thinking that we are separate individuals, and that we can lose our individuality. How can the universal I, the universal Self, be lost? It isnt possible, and with this clear knowledge and understanding automatically comes the loss of all fear. I is survival (although not of what we call me), of this there can be no question. It is incontrovertible wisdom. Face the facts, be courageous.
How to carry on
Nobodys perfect. Its an impossible state while we have this separateness. We carry on by changing the old lifestyle, changing the old way of thinking, and starting to live in reality, not in fanciful dreams. And, as we have said, this doesnt happen overnight. What happens, and how we can monitor progress, is that we just get happier. Not simply a passing happiness, but a deep immeasurable one. We become more peaceful, more at peace with ourselves. And with the input each of us makes, so the deepness of this experience grows. Yes, there still will be trials and tribulations, happinesses and sadnesses, good health and bad, but all this happens in a different light. Earlier it was said that this book does not offer a particular path to follow. Each person has to find their own self. No-one can do it for us. But what has been said may start us off in a whole new direction leading to perfect happiness. We hope it does.
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Contact the inner Self and attain guidance from it. The address we know, if not redress. Address in heaven. sr.kaivalya@yahoo.co.uk
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O is a symbol of the world, of oneness and unity. In different cultures it also means the eye, symbolizing knowledge and insight. We aim to publish books that are accessible, constructive and that challenge accepted opinion, both that of academia and the moral majority. Our books are available in all good English language bookstores worldwide. If you dont see the book on the shelves ask the bookstore to order it for you, quoting the ISBN number and title. Alternatively you can order online (all major online retail sites carry our titles) or contact the distributor in the relevant country, listed on the copyright page. See our website www.o-books.net for a full list of over 500 titles, growing by 100 a year.
And tune in to myspiritradio.com for our book review radio show, hosted by June-Elleni Laine, where you can listen to the authors discussing their books.

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Who Are You? Really!