15 things you don't know about your penis

1. Smoking can shorten your penis by as much as a centimeter.

Erections are all about good bloodflow, and lighting up calcifies
blood vessels, stifling erectile circulation. So even if you don't
care all that much about your lungs or dying young, spare the li'l
guy.

2. Doctors can now grow skin for burn victims using the foreskins
of circumcised infants. One foreskin can produce 23,000 square
meters, which would be enough to tarp every Major League
infield with human flesh.

3. An enlarged prostate gland can cause both erectile dysfunction

and premature ejaculation. If you have an unexplained case of
either, your doctor's looking forward to checking your prostate.
Even if you're not.

4. The average male orgasm lasts 6 seconds. Women get 23

seconds. Which means if women were really interested in
equality, they'd make sure we have four orgasms for every one of
theirs.

5. The oldest known species with a penis is a hard-shelled sea

creature called Colymbosathon ecplecticos. That's Greek for
"amazing swimmer with large penis." Which officially supplants
Buck Naked as the best porn name, ever.

6. Circumcised foreskin can be reconstructed. Movable skin on

the shaft of the penis is pulled toward the tip and set in place
with tape. Later, doctors apply plastic rings, caps, and weights.
Years can pass until complete coverage is attained. . . . Okay,
we'll shut up now.

7. Only one man in 400 is flexible enough to give himself oral

pleasure. It's estimated, however, that all 400 have given it their
best shot at some point.

8. There are two types of penises. One kind expands and

lengthens when becoming erect (a grower). The other appears
big most of the time, but doesn't get much bigger after achieving
erection (a shower).

9. An international Men's Health survey reports that 79 percent of

men have growers, 21 percent have showers.

10. German researchers say the average intercourse lasts 2

minutes, 50 seconds, yet women perceive it as lasting 5 minutes,
30 seconds. Are we that good or that bad?

11. Turns out size does matter: The longer your penis, the better
"semen displacement" you'll achieve when having sex with a
woman flush with competing sperm. That's according to
researchers at the State University of New York, who used
artificial phalluses (ahem) to test the "scooping" mechanism of
the penis's coronal ridge. Next up: curing cancer.

12. The penis that's been enjoyed by the most women could be
that of King Fatefehi of Tonga, who supposedly deflowered 37,800
women between the years 1770 and 1784 -- that's about seven
virgins a day. Go ahead, say it: It's good to be king.

13. Better-looking men may have stronger sperm. Spanish

researchers showed women photos of guys who had good,
average, and lousy sperm -- and told them to pick the
handsomest men. The women chose the best sperm producers
most often.

14. No brain is necessary for ejaculation. That order comes from

the spinal cord. Finding a living vessel for said ejaculation,
however, takes hours of careful thought and, often, considerable
amounts of alcohol.

15. The most common cause of penile rupture: vigorous

masturbation. Some risks are just worth taking.