CHAPTER I The Problem and Its Scope Introduction A mother, mom, mum, momma, or mama is a woman who has

raised a child, given birth to a child, and/or supplied the ovum that grew into a child. (mother, Oxford Dictionaries online . http://oxforddictionaries.com). At younger years, our primary care giver is our beloved parents who nurtures us and teaches us the basics of living. Caring for children is universal in manner, the way the child is taught to crawl first before walking, then running, from breastfeeding to mast food then to solid foods, these systematic learning of a child is required to be with accordance to his age but in some instances not all live born child is normal. Humans are capable of living and sustaining the productivity of our lives in accordance to what our environment we are part of. And as citizens of the society the first and foremost right that we must gain as individuals is the right to be born. Because we are born in this world it only signifies that we are special being with unique characteristics, features, and flaws. How the concept of normal is created and perceived can be carried over into all aspects of life; for example, a normal marriage, a normal job, and a normal child. What happens when something is not normal? In this society this process of normalization leads to a notion of deviance. What is not normal, or those

who do not subscribe to and practice normal social forms, may be considered abnormal or deviant (Aston, p.284). The term autism comes from Greek auto, meaning self, and refers to an abnormal withdrawal from the world outside oneself. The American psychiatrist Leo Kanner first described the disorder in 1943. Autism was originally thought to be a form of schizophrenia, but it has been recognized since the 1960s as a distinct developmental disorder that is not a psychosis. Modern researchers now identify a wide spectrum of autism symptoms that may occur in different combinations or with different severities in children. (Autism, Microsoft Encarta 2009. 1993-2008) Autism is a disorder that affects the social, emotional, and behavioral

development of children. Autism is marked by serious difficulties in interacting and communicating with other people. Other symptoms may include constantly repeating certain actions or behaviors, or having intense interests restricted to only particular things or topics. Symptoms of autism usually appear before the age of three and can last the rest of a persons lifetime. Autism is at least four times more common in boys than in girls. The Autism Society of America reports the autism incidence rates of the estimated number of individuals with autism in 2007: Philippines- 500,000 cases. (Autism in Children, > http://www.earlysignsofautism.com/is-autism-increasing-in-theusa). Eighty percent of cases of autism are early-onset with developmental delays starting in infancy. The other 20% of children with autism have seemingly normal growth and development until 2 or 3 years of age when developmental regression or loss of abilities begin. They stop talking and relating to parents and peers and begin to demonstrate the behaviors described above (National Institute of Child and Human

Development [NICHD], 2002). Autism was once thought to be rare and was estimated to occur in 4 to 5 children per 1000 in the 1960s. Current estimates suggest that 1 in 1000 to 1 in 500 U.S. children from 1 to 15 years of age have autism. (National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, >http://ww.nichd.nih/

gov/publications/pub/autism/facts) The causes of autism remain a major area of research and of controversy. Studies indicate that autism is often associated with abnormalities in the functioning of the brain and that the disorder may have a genetic basis in most cases. Raising a child with autism can present special challenges for a family. There is no cure for autism but some treatments and therapies can lessen the symptoms. Some persons with autism may need special care throughout their lives while others may learn to function independently in society. The abnormality is sometimes a lifetime burden for the child and for the one caring for the child. Caring for these special children is a perceived to be a blessing or ought to be a sense of consequence for an immortal action in the past. Having this unique individuals in the family requires additional support, additional effort, and additional understanding as to what these children behaves. This is not an easy task to imagine much more to the one who primarily nurtures these individuals, who is their mother. Of all the variety of issues present in todays society especially current health issues, the proponents chooses to undertake is to explain the phenomena existing in a mother and challenged child relationship. So basically, this study deals with the lived experiences of mothers caring an Autistic child. care. And by understanding their experiences we can explain better the observed phenomena residing in a mother and challenged child relationship in which this study is trying to convey.

Review of Related Literature and Study

Review of related Literature

The mother Mother is defined as the person in whom life receives a form suitable for living in this world. The responsibilities of a loving mother never end. Whether the aim is looking out for their childs best interests or simply being there for support, a mothers love is unconditional. The most important role as a mother is being a provider, provider of a good home, proper nutrition, and physical and emotional support. It may seem like a never-ending chore, but most woman take motherhood like second nature the minute they are declared mother. One of the most important thing a mother wants to ensure is the safety of her child. A safe environment is something a responsible mother must ensure to her child, whatever the age group her child may belong. As mothers they must allow their children to enjoy the rest of their lives, regardless the numbers their children is expected to live, as equal individuals. A special concern of many contemporary mother is whether working full time in a career will harm their childrens development. ( Parkey and Buriel, p.231). Becoming evolution of a womans persona (Mercer, p. 226). It can be seen as a difficult, multifactoral process that, as with any major developmental transition, requires a mother involves an enormous transformation and

restructuring goals, behaviours, and responsibilities to achieve a new conception of self (Harvey-Vallender, p. 27). A new mother commonly finds that she has changed in ways that she had never imagined; she has moved
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from a known current reality to an unknown new reality (Mercer, 226). New mothers go through profound change and with it may experience a sense of loss, isolation, and fatigue (Rogan et al., 887). Barclay, Everitt, Rogan, Schmied, and Wyllie p.719) separated the process of becoming a mother into six categories: (a) realization: facing the overwhelming process of becoming a mother and the consequences on her life; (b) unreadiness: feeling unready for the reality of motherhood; (c) drained: a sense of having given everything and of being emptied out that results from the physical, mental, and emotional demands associated with this new role; (d) alone: a feeling that many mothers described that is typically associated with feeling

unsupported; (e) loss: an experience that occurs in a variety of areas and in a variety of ways: loss of time, of control over ones life, of sense of self; and working it out: the development of skills and increasing confidence in being a mother and caring for her baby. Dominant ideologies ultimately influence how we see ourselves. In considering what it means to be a mother, we take cues from the people around us, from our culture, and from society. Social norms define proper and improper behaviors and thus create a prescribed maternal role (Rogan et al., p.719). The normalization of motherhood is heavily influenced by medical discourse as well as personal, historical, social, and institutional practices (Aston, p.284). Hartrick p. 316) contends the Western perspective of what a healthy, mature self [is], one that is differentiated and independent, is in direct opposition to the Western perspective of a good mother. According to Oakley (p.265), a major expectation of a good mother
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in Western society is abnegation of self. It is therefore normal and expected that women will self-sacrifice for their children. This notion has been described as the institution of motherhood, the way that women become mothers in industrialized society today (Hartrick, p.316; Mercer, p.226; Oakley, p. 265).

Parental Role According to Hockenberry, Marilyn J. (p.423), in the family groups the socially recognized status of father and mother exist with socially sanctioned roles that appropriate sexual behaviors and childrearing responsibilities. During childhood, particularly in the upper and middle class, the trend is toward deemphasizing malefemale characteristics of aggression, dependence, and achievement. As the role of the women changes, there must be necessary changes in the complementary role of the man. Marital roles are more segregated in the lower classes. Cultural lag of the persisting role definition creates role conflict in many of this families. In the stages of growth and development, parent develop this stages ; for family with infants, parents, accommodate new parenting and maintain family bond. In younger years, parents socialize their children and they adjust to separation. In school children, children develop peer relations. Parents adjust to their childrens peer and school influences. With teenagers, adolescent develop increasing autonomy. Parents refocus on midlife marital and career issues and begin to a shift toward concern for older generation. Even though many children spend a great deal of time in child- care situations away from home, parents are still the main caregivers for the vast majority of the worlds children. And parents have always wondered what is the best way to rear their children.

Spare the rod and spoil the child. Children are to be seen and not heard. There was a time when parents took those adages seriously. But our attitudes toward children- and parenting techniques have changed. (Hockenberry, Marilyn J. p.423), Parenting Styles Authoritarian Parenting The authoritarian is a restrictive, punitive style in which the parent exhorts the child to follow the parents directions and to respect work and effort. The authoritarian parent firmly limits and controls the child with little verbal exchanged. Authoritarian parenting is associated with childrens social incompetence. In a difference of opinion about how to do something. Children with authoritarian parents often are anxious about social comparison, fail to initiate activity, and have poor communication skills. (Diana Baumrind p.116). Children raised in authoritarian families lack practice in negotiating for their desires and exercising responsibility. They tend to resent all authority and to rebel without cost. Children raised in permissive families tend to feel unwanted and to doubt their own self- worth. They often do not trust themselves or others ( Conger, p.237). Authoritative Parenting This encourages children to be independent but still places limits and controls on their behavior. Extensive verbal give-and-take is allowed and parents are warm and nurturant towards the child. Authoritative parenting is associated with childrens social competence. An authoritative parent might put his arm around the child in a comforting way. Children whose parents are authoritative tend to be socially competent, self-reliant, and socially responsible. (Diana Baumrind p.116). It seems clear that authoritative
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parenting yields the best result. This seems to come from 2 feature the establishment of limits on the child and responding to the child with warmth and support ( Bukatko and Daehler, p.128). Authoritative parents set limits and demand maturity, but when punishing a child, the parent will explain his or her motive for their punishment. "Their punishments are measured and consistent in discipline, not harsh or arbitrary. Parents will set clear standards for their children, monitor limits that they set, and also allow children to develop autonomy. They also expect mature, independent, and age-appropriate behavior of children." They are attentive to their childrens needs and concerns, and will typically forgive and teach instead of punishing if a child falls short. This is supposed to result in children having a higher self esteem and independence because of the democratic give-take nature of the authoritative parenting style. This is the most recommended style of parenting by child-rearing experts. (White, F. Hayes, B., & Livesey, D. p.133). Children resulting from this type of parenting may have less social competence because the parent generally tells the child what to do instead of allowing the child to choose by him or herself. Nonetheless, researchers have found that in some cultures and ethnic groups, aspects of authoritarian style may be associated with more positive child outcomes than Baumrind expects. "Aspects of traditional Asian child-rearing

practices are often continued by Asian American families. In some cases, these practices have been described as authoritarian." If the demands are pushed too forcefully upon the child, the child will break down, rebel, or run away. ( White, F., Hayes, B., & Livesey, D. p.133).

Neglectful Parenting This is a style in which parents are uninvolved in their childs life. This style is associated with the childs social incompetence, especially a lack of self-control. This type of parent cannot give an affirmative answer to the question. Children have a strong need for their parents to care about them. Children whose parents are neglectful might developed a sense that other aspects of the parents lives are more important than they are. Children whose parents are neglectful tend to show poor self-control and do not handle independence well. (Diana Baumrind p.116). Children whose parents are neglectful develop the sense that other aspects of the parents lives are more important than they are. Many children of this parenting style often attempt to provide for themselves or halt depending on the parent to get a feeling of being independent and mature beyond their years. Parents, and thus their children, often display contradictory behavior. Children become emotionally withdrawn from social situations. This disturbed attachment also impacts relationships later on in life. In adolescence, they may show patterns of truancy and delinquency. ( White, F., Hayes, B., & Livesey, D. p.133).

Indulgent Parenting This is a style in which parents are involved with their children but place few demands on them. Indulgent parenting is associated with childrens social incompetence, especially a lack of self-control. Such parents let their children do what
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they want, and the result is the children never learn to control their own behavior and always expect to get their way. Some parents deliberately rear their children in this way because they believe the combination of warm involvement with few restraints will produce a creative, confident child. Children whose parents are indulgent never learn respect for others and have difficulty controlling their behavior. (Diana Baumrind p.116).). Children of permissive parents may tend to be more impulsive, and as adolescents, may engage more in misconduct, and in drug use. "Children never learn to control their own behavior and always expect to get their way." But in the better cases they are emotionally secure, independent and are willing to learn and accept defeat. They mature quickly and are able to live life without the help of someone else. But as previously noted, the usefulness of these data are limited, as they are only correlational and can not rule out effects such as heredity (permissive parents and their children share hands-off personalities and are likely to be less driven as their authoritarian counterparts), child-to-parent effects (unfocused and unmanageable children might discourage their parents from trying too hard), and local shared cultural values (that may not emphasize achievement). ( White, F., Hayes, B., & Livesey, D. p.133).

Other Parenting Styles What may be right for one family or one child may not be suitable for another. With authoritarian and permissive (indulgent) parenting on opposite sides of the spectrum, most conventional and modern models of parenting fall somewhere in between. The model or style that parents employ depends partly on how they themselves were reared, what they consider good parenting, the child's temperament,
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their current environmental situation, and whether they place more importance on their own needs or whether they are striving to further their child's future success. Parents who place greater importance on the child's physical security may be more authoritarian, while parents who are more concerned with intellectual development may push their children into a number of organized extra-curricular activities such as music and language lessons. (Santrock, J.W. p. 198) According to Santrock, John W. (pp.341-343) other parenting styles includes the following:

Attachment parenting Seeks to create strong emotional bonds, avoiding physical punishment and accomplishing discipline through interactions recognizing a child's emotional needs all while focusing on holistic understanding of the child.

Christian parenting The application of biblical principles on parenting, mainly in the United States. While some Christian parents follow a stricter and more authoritarian interpretation of the Bible, others are "grace-based" and share methods advocated in the attachment parenting and positive parenting theories. Particularly influential on opposite sides have been James Dobson and his book Dare to

Discipline, and William Sears who has written several parenting books including The Complete Book of Christian Parenting & Child Care and The Discipline Book. Emotion coaching This style of parenting lays out a loving, nurturing path for raising happy, well-adjusted, well-behaved children. Its called emotion coaching and it feels good to parents and kids alike. Emotion coaching helps teach your child how to recognize and express the way he is feeling in an appropriate way.

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Concerted cultivation A style of parenting that is marked by the parents' attempts to foster their child's talents through organized leisure activities. This parenting style is commonly exhibited in middle and upper class American families.

Overparenting Parents who try to involve themselves in every aspect of their child's life, often attempting to solve all their problems. A helicopter parent is a colloquial, early 21st-century term for a parent who pays extremely close attention to his or her children's experiences and problems, and attempts to sweep all obstacles out of their paths, particularly at educational institutions. Helicopter parents are so named because, like helicopters, they hover closely overhead. It is a form of overparenting.

Nurturant parenting A family model where children are expected to explore their surroundings with protection from their parents.

Slow parenting Encourages parents to plan and organise less for their children, instead allowing them to enjoy their childhood and explore the world at their own pace.

Strict parenting An authoritarian approach, places a strong value on discipline and following inflexible rules as a means to survive and thrive in a harsh world.

Parenting For Everyone A parenting book and one individual's philosophy that discusses parenting from an ethical point of view.

Taking Children Seriously The central idea of this movement is that it is possible and desirable to raise and educate children without doing anything to them against their will, or making them do anything against their will.

The Normal Child

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Berk, Laura E. (pp.604-605) discussed that when formal schooling begins, children are exposed to agemates who differ in many ways, including achievement, ethnicity, religion, interest and personality. Contact with a wider variety of peers probably contributes to elementary school childrens increasing awareness that other has viewpoints different from their own. Peer communication, in turn, profits from

improved perspective taking. Children of this age are better accurately interpreting emotions and intentions of others and taking them into account in peer dialogues. In addition, their ability to understand the complementary roles of several players permits the transition to rule-oriented games in middle childhood. School-age children also apply their greater awareness of social norms to peer interaction. Sharing and helping and other prosocial acts increase in middle childhood. In addition, older children are differ from younger ones in the way they go about helping agemates. Kindergartners move right in and give assistance, regarding of whether it is desired or not. In contrast. School-age children offer to help and wait for peer to accept it before behaving prosocially. (Hartup, W.W. p.336). As children enter middle childhood., another from peer interaction becomes increasingly common. Watch children at play in a public park or schoolyard, and you will see that they sometimes wrestle, roll, hit, and run after one another while smiling and laughing. This friendly chasing and play fighting is called rough-and-rumble play. Research indicates that is a good-natured, sociable activity that is quite distinct from aggressive fighting. Children in many cultures engage in it with peers whom they like especially well, and they do at the end of an aggressive encounter. Sometimes parents and teachers mistakes rough and tumble for real fighting and try to intervene. In these instances, children often respond, its all right, were only playing. School-age

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youngsters are quite good at telling the difference between playful wrestling and a true aggressive attack. (Costabile et.al. p.881)

Children with Special needs "Special needs" are commonly defined by what a child can't do -- by milestones unmet, foods banned, activities avoided, experiences denied. These minuses hit families hard, and may make "special needs" seem like a tragic designation. As suggested by Halforn, N. & Newacheck, P.W., (pp. 600-609) children with special needs may have mild learning disabilities or profound mental retardation; food allergies or terminal illness; developmental delays that catch up quickly or remain entrenched; occasional panic attacks or serious psychiatric problems. The designation is useful for getting needed services, setting appropriate goals, and gaining understanding for a child and stressed family. Developmental disabilities are some of the most devastating for a family to deal with, changing visions of the future and providing immediate difficulties in caring for and educating a child. Diagnoses like autism, Down syndrome and mental retardation often cause children to be removed from the mainstream, and parents must be fierce advocates to make sure their children receive the services, therapy, schooling, and inclusion they need and deserve. (Baldrige, Kathy H. and Andrasik, Frank, pp. 29) Like any other human being, the Developmentally Challenged child does not live in a vacuum. The retarded child needs, as do all persons, close emotional relationships with others- and these relationships must be satisfying and stress-reducing if the child is to achieve maximum potentialities. The relationships between the Developmentally Challenged child and parents are great importance. The parents manifest negative personality reactions to the child deficient abilities, and then it becomes more difficult for
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wholesome relationships to be established. The greater the negative emotional reactions of the parents, the less likely it is that the child will achieve the level of emotional maturity he is capable of attaining. Negative reactions of the parents, thus, can adversely affect the full maturational development of the Developmentally Challenged child. Considerable attention has been devoted to study of many aspects of the retarded child, but very little has been given to study of the emotional reactions of the parents. This is unfortunate, since the welfare of the child depends, in large measure, on the well being of the parents, in general, as the parent goes, so goes the child. (Hutt, Matt et.al., page 269-272.)

Expectations of family with special needs Parents dream that their children will work to benefit society. While every parent may not anticipate raising a doctor or lawyer, the desire for the child to contribute to society is strong. Children with special needs may make a difference in many ways and to many people. According to Potera , Carol (p.16), parents of children with Special needs know the compassion their child has for others. Smiles and hugs are freely given. A child with Special needs continually reminds his/her family and everyone around him/her that compassion is an important character trait. And he/she can make this understood without ever speaking a word. A family dealing with developmentally challenged children will have different concerns than one dealing with chronic illness, which will have different concerns than one dealing with mental illness or learning problems or behavioral challenges. Living with a child with mental health issues can put family members on a roller coaster of mood swings and crises and defiance. Parents have to find the right professionals to help, and make hard decisions about therapy,
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medications, and hospitalization. The consequences of missed clues and wrong guesses can be significant. Hockenberry, Marilyn J.,(p.423) suggested that caring for a child with disability may place tremendous demands on the parents energy, time and financial resources. Depending on the role assumed by each parent, the mother often performs the bulk of the traditional care and household responsibilities, and the father shoulders the financial responsibilities . However, with changing gender roles these responsibilities may be shared and parents may divide the task according to their level of comfort or skills. On the other hand, involving both parents in decision making and in education regarding the care of the children with special needs can decrease some of the burdens of care often placed inadvertently on mothers. The parents who involved in the care giving activities may feel neglected because much attention is directed toward the child and resentful that he or she is not adequately informed to be competent in the care. Without active participation in the care of the child, the parent may have a little understanding of the time and energy needed to perform those activities. When the less competent parents makes an effort to become involved, the other parent often criticizes the less skillful effort. As a result, communication may break down, and neither is able to support the other.

Parental Reaction to a Child with Special Needs When a child is born with a birth defect or has an illness that requires special care, the family is under additional stress. In most cases, their initial reactions of shock and disbelief gradually resolve into acceptance of the childs limitations. However, the
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parents grieving may be chronic as they repeatedly see other children doing things that their child cannot and perhaps will not ever do. These families often suffer financial hardship. Health insurance benefits may quickly reach their maximum. Even if the child has public assistance for health care costs, the family often experiences a fall in income because one parent must remain home with the sick child rather than work outside the home. Strains on the marriage and the parents relationships with their other children are inevitable under these circumstances. Parents have little time or energy left to nurture their relationship with each other, and divorce may add yet another strain to the family. Siblings may resent the parental time and attention required for care of the ill child yet feel guilty if they express their resentment. (Mckinney, Emily Slone, p.607) A family dealing with developmental delays will have different concerns than the one dealing with chronic illness, which will have different concerns than one dealing with mental illness or learning problems or behavioral challenges. Independent of their unique situation, there are some common concerns that link parents of challenged kids, including getting appropriate care and accommodations; promoting acceptance in the extended family, school and community; planning for an uncertain future; and adjusting routines and expectations. The presence of a Developmentally Challenged child in a family unit has far reaching effects. At the periphery of the circle of which the child is the center are the effects of retardation on society at large, which ultimately has to bear responsibility for the childs ,management and treatment. At the core are the tremendous impacts made by the childs condition on parents and siblings, and these effects indeed may be a great issue. Nor should it be overlooked that the reactions of the family and society in turn affect the child with special needs. (Special Children, Special Parents Part 1 http://www.blisstherapeutic.com/special-children-special-

parents-part-1/)
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Common concerns for Families with a Child with Special Needs Although any defect in a newborn produces extreme concern and anxiety, certain defects are associated with long term parenting problems. The face is visible to everyone, and parents are fearful about whether the child will be accepted. Birth of an infant with an anomaly evokes a grief response, and the family must mourn the loss of the perfect infant they fantasized about during pregnancy. Early emotions include denial, anger, and guilt. Denial and disbelief are the initial reactions of most parents to the birth of an infant with a congenital defect. Anger is often a pervasive response, and it may take the form of fault-finding or resentment. Anger may be directed toward the family, the medical personnel, or the self, but it is seldom directed toward the infant. Guilt may be expressed as a question of responsibility for the defect: I shouldnt have worked so much while I was pregnant. Other emotions include fear, which may be expressed as concern about what must be done in the immediate or distant future (surgical procedures, complicated health care, the infants potential for a normal life). Sadness and depression, manifested by crying, withdrawal from relationships, lack of energy, inability to sleep, and decreased appetite, may precede acceptance and resolution. Gradually, often after a prolonged period, feelings of sadness abate and the family can accept and resolve grief. (Mckinney, Emily Slone, p.607) All parents share similar dreams for their children. They want them to be successful at what they do; they want them to be happy. Above all, they want them to be healthy. Although every special-needs child is different and every family is unique, there are some common concerns that link parents of challenged kids, including getting appropriate care and accommodations; promoting acceptance in the extended family, school and community; planning for an uncertain future; and adjusting routines and
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expectations. Parents of children with special needs are often more flexible, compassionate, stubborn and resilient than other parents. They have to be. (Hockenberry, p.345)

Medical Issues: Medical Issues for children include serious conditions like cancer and heart defects, muscular dystrophy and cystic fibrosis; chronic conditions like asthma and diabetes; congenital conditions like cerebral palsy and dwarfism; and health threats like food allergies and obesity. Children with medical issues may require numerous tests, long hospital stays, expensive equipment, and accommodations for disabilities. Their families have to deal with frequent crises, uncertainty, and worry. (Mauro, Terri .What Are"Special Needs"?http://specialchildren.about.com/od/gettingadiagnosis/p/whatare.h tm) Behavior Issues: Children with behavior issues do not respond to traditional discipline. With diagnoses like ADHD, Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, Dysfunction of Sensory Integration, and Tourette syndrome, they require specialized strategies that are tailored to their specific abilities and disabilities. If those strategies are not developed and used, kids with behavior issues throw their families into chaos and are seriously at risk for school problems. Their parents need to be flexible and creative. (Mauro, Terri .What Are" Special Needs"?http://specialchildren.about.com/od/gettingadiagnosis/p/whatare .htm) Developmental Issues:

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Developmental disabilities are some of the most devastating for a family to deal with, changing visions of the future and providing immediate difficulties in caring for and educating a child. Diagnoses like autism, Down syndrome and mental retardation often cause children to be removed from the mainstream, and parents must be fierce advocates to make sure their children receive the services, therapy, schooling, and inclusion they need and deserve. (Mauro, Terri .What Are "Special Needs"? http://specialchildren.about.com/od/gettingadiagnosis/p/whatare.htm) Learning Issues: Children with learning disabilities like dyslexia and Central Auditory Processing Disorder struggle with schoolwork regardless of their intellectual abilities. They require specialized learning strategies to meet their potential and avoid self-esteem problems and behavioral difficulties. Parents of learning-challenged kids need to be persistent both in working with their reluctant learners and with the schools that must provide the help these children need. (Mauro, Terri .What Are "Special Needs"?

http://specialchildren.about.com/od/gettingadiagnosis/p/whatare.htm)

Mental Health Issues: A child's problems with anxiety or depression can sneak up on parents; problems with attachment may smack them right in the face. Living with a child with mental health issues can put family members on a roller coaster of mood swings and crises and defiance. Parents have to find the right professionals to help, and make hard decisions about therapy, medications, and hospitalization. The consequences of missed clues and wrong guesses can be significant. (Mauro, Terri .What Are "Special Needs"? http://specialchildren.about.com/od/gettingadiagnosis/p/whatare.htm)
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An Autism Child
According to American Academy of Child-Adolescent Psychiatry,

(http://aacap.org/page.ww?name=The+Child+with+Autism&section=Facts+for+Families) Autism is usually identified by the time a child is 30 months old. It is often discovered when parents become concerned that their child may be deaf, is not yet talking, resists cuddling, and avoids interaction with others Some of the early signs and symptoms which suggest a young child may need further evaluation for autism include: no smiling by six months of age no back and forth sharing of sounds, smiles or facial expressions by nine months no babbling, pointing, reaching or waving by 12 months no single words by 16 months no two word phrases by 24 months regression in development any loss of speech, babbling or social skills The severity of autism varies widely, from mild to severe. Some children are very bright and do well in school, although they have problems with school adjustment. They may be able to live independently when they grow up. Other children with autism function at a much lower level. Mental retardation is commonly associated with autism. Children with autism need a comprehensive evaluation and specialized behavioral and educational programs. Some children with autism may also benefit from treatment with medication. Child and adolescent psychiatrists are trained to diagnose autism, and to help families design and implement an appropriate treatment plan. They
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can also help families cope with the stress which may be associated with having a child with autism. Although there is no cure for autism, appropriate specialized treatment provided early in life can have a positive impact on the child's development and produce an overall reduction in disruptive behaviors and symptoms. Parenting an Autistic ChildTop of Form Bottom of Form Raising a child with autism is one of the hardest things a parent will ever have to do. It is n overwhelming challenge physically and emotionally adding anxiety on the person caring for the child. Rearing a child with autism often contributes to marital problems, problems with other children, and job instability. Unfortunately, there are no reliable treatments for autism, and the responsibility of upbringing, developmental and behavioral problems of the autistic child falls largely on the family. Although there is nothing that we can do to change the origin of the problem, there are strategies which family members can do to reduce the level of abnormal behavior and increase the child's ability to cope. Research indicates that parents of children with autism experience greater stress than parents of children with learning disabilities. An individual with autism may not express their basic wants or needs in a way that one would expect. Therefore, parents are left playing a guessing game. Is the child crying because he/she is thirsty, hungry, or sick? When a parent cannot determine their child's needs, both are left feeling frustrated. The child's frustration can lead to aggressive or self-injurious behaviors that threaten their safety and the safety of other family members (e.g. siblings). Autism characteristics and compulsive behaviors concern parents since they seem odd and obstruct with performance and learning. More parents are raising

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children with a diagnosis of autism and families often find themselves dealing with financial and social challenges, as well. Daily care routine, economic problems, receiving appropriate help and education are the basic hardships of the parents of a disabled child. The additional stress can be significant, taking its toll on the whole family and even contributing to a high divorce rate. Fifteen years ago the incidence of autism was 1 in 5,000, compared to today's rate of 1 in 150, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. While an ASD diagnosis can alter parents' dreams for their children, they should be optimistic. Much has been learned about ADS in the last 15 years and research into causes and interventions continues to grow. (Parenting an Autistic Child > http://www.brighttots.com/Autism/Parenting_autistic_child)

The Challenge of Parenting a Child with Autism

According to (Parenting an Autistic a child Child with

>http://www.brighttots.com/Autism/Parenting

_autistic_child)Parenting

autism is uniquely challenging and can be very demanding. Recently, there are increasing efforts to involve parents of children with autism in interventions. In comparison to parents of typically developing children, parents raising children with disabilities experience more parenting stress and have higher rates of anxiety. Even among parents raising children with disabilities, parents of children with autism report significantly higher levels of stress and are more likely to experience depression. The underlying cause of these findings may be that parenting stress is associated with the frequency and extent of childs inflexible behavior and children with autism often engage in unusual behaviors and have heightened sensory sensitivity.

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Parents expectations and beliefs about parenting begin before their child is born and are modified through interactions with their developing child. Because children with autism behave in ways that are unusual and hard to foresee, how parents interpret their childrens behavior may play a strong role in parental experience. Studies have revealed that parental stress and depression are negatively associated with parenting capability, or the parents way of interpreting feelings of competence in the parenting role. Understanding self-efficacy also has been associated with wellbeing among mothers and has been shown to reduce the effect of the child behavior on mothers anxiety and depression. A better outlook to abilities and feelings about parenting a child with autism may lead to a more supportive involvement that enhances the parents wellbeing. (Autism For Parents >http://autismforparents.wordpress.com/) According to Helping Children many with families cope Autism with the

(http://www.helpguide.org/mental/autism_help.htm),

additional challenges of getting their child to sleep through the night or eat a wider variety of foods. All of these issues and behaviors are physically exhausting for families and emotionally draining. For families of children on the autism spectrum this can be a particular challenge. Scheduled dinner times may not be successful due to the child's inability to sit appropriately for extended periods of time. Bedtime routines can be interrupted by difficulties sleeping. Fixed behaviors may prevent families from attending events together. For example, one parent stays home with the autistic child, while the other takes the siblings out to an event. Not being able to do things as a family can impact the marital relationship. In addition, spouses often cannot spend time alone due to their extreme parenting demands and the lack of qualified caregiver to watch a child with autism in their absence.

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The Stress of Future Care-taking One of the most major sources of stress is the concern regarding future sheltering. Parents know that they provide their child with exceptional care. They fear that no one will take care of their child like they do. There may also be no other family members willing or capable of carrying out this task. Even though parents try to fight off thinking about the future, these thoughts and worries are still constantly present. The Stress of Finances Having a child on the autism spectrum can drain a family's resources due to expenses such as evaluations, educational programs, and various therapies. The care-taking demands of nurturing for a child with autism may lead one parent to give up his or her job, financial strains may be escalate by only having one income to support all of the families' needs.

The Stress of Not Having a Typical Child There is a well-known point of view which says that parents of children with autism spectrum disorder are grieving the loss of the "typical" child they expected to have. In addition, parents are distraught by the loss of lifestyle that they imagined for themselves and their family. The feelings of anguish that parents experience can be an additional build up of stress due the childs ongoing temperament. Current theories of grief suggest that parents of children with developmental disabilities experience episodes of grief throughout the life cycle as different events (e.g., birthdays, holidays, endless caretaking) trigger grief reactions. Experiencing "chronic sorrow" is a psychological tension that can be frustrating, confusing and depressing.

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Review of Related Studies

A study, Parenting a Child with Chronic Illness, conducted by Jean Sheerin Coffey, MS, APRN, CPNP entitled Parenting a Child with Chronic Illness: A Metasynthesis works at Essex Pediatrics, Essex, VT. She is a Doctoral Candidate, University of Connecticut, Storrs, CT. The 11 studies chosen were conducted in four different countries. Five of the studies were conducted in the United States, one in Japan, one in Germany, and four in Canada. The studies involved 533 participants, with 140 of those clearly identified as fathers. The remainder of the participants were identified as mothers, with the exception of five families from one study with no indication of the parental role of the participants. The age of the children ranged from birth to 22 years of age. One study using older

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children was retrospective and asked the parents to reflect on parenting when the child was younger. It was conducted in the United States last 2003. Her subject are those children diagnosed with chronic illness cared for by their parents or guardians. The purpose of this study was to create a comprehensive chronicle of the phenomena of parenting a child with a chronic illness. This accumulated body of knowledge is presented from the parents point of view as they care for a child with a chronic illness. And to explore the phenomenon of parenting (by mother)a child with chronic illness as reported from a qualitativeresearch perspective. The use of a metasynthesis is an effective way to use the collective information generated from individual qualitative studies. Qualitative metasynthesis entails a systematic approach to the collection and analysis of qualitative studies.... The results of the study is that the 11 studies yielded a rich supply of metaphors. The first step was to construct a table of metaphors from each of the studies. During the construction of the table, seven themes evolved from the studies. Each of the themes is then illuminated through the rich quotations of the parents caring for their child with chronic illness. (Jean Sheerin, C. pp.51-59) Another study conducted by Melnick Watson on the year 2000 entitled

Mothering a child with hidden impairments. At West Virginia University, Division of Occupational Therapy. This study describes the mother that has a child with hidden impairments. This is to help the mother on how to deal with their child and on how to extend their patience towards the child. When a mother has a child with a chronic impairment, the occupational demands of mothering extend to address the specialized needs of that child. This research explores how the type of hidden impairment in a child influences family routines and
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occupations. This qualitative study consisted of interviews with 22 mothers of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), a behavioral disorder, and 22 mothers of children with cystic fibrosis, a physical disorder. Open-ended questions were used to explore family demands, resources, time use, routines, concerns, and support. The transcripts of these interviews were analyzed in terms of consistency with existing literature on parenting the child with hidden disability, and for emergent themes. In this analysis the experiences of mothers of children with cystic fibrosis were consistent with research findings on other chronic conditions, with these mothers reporting that family provides them with extensive physical and emotional support. Although mothers of children with cystic fibrosis reported a persistent emotional sorrow, they felt they were able to "normalize" their daily routines. In contrast, mothers of children with ADHD reported little family support, high perception of child-related demands, and less confidence in their success in mothering these children. In describing their daily routines, these mothers often stated that there was no such thing as a "normal" day. They felt constantly "on alert" and did not feel that they had "normal" routines. Based on this study, mothers of children with ADHD felt distress because their child did not easily conform to social standards, and were likely to express exhaustion in their role as "mother." The pattern of responses offered by these participants differs significantly from that of the participants whose children have cystic fibrosis, and from the usual pattern of coping with chronic childhood disability documented in the literature.
(Mothering a child with hidden impairments. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/14763639)

When a mother has a child with a chronic impairment, the occupational demands of mothering extend to address the specialized needs of that child. This research explores how the type of Hidden Impairment in a Child Influences Family Routines and Occupations.
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This qualitative study consisted of interviews with 22 mothers of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), a behavioral disorder, and 22 mothers of children with cystic fibrosis, a physical disorder. Open-ended questions were used to explore family demands, resources, time use, routines, concerns, and support. The transcripts of these interviews were analyzed in terms of consistency with existing literature on parenting the child with hidden disability, and for emergent themes. In this analysis the experiences of mothers of children with cystic fibrosis were consistent with research findings on other chronic conditions, with these mothers reporting that family provides them with extensive physical and emotional support. Although mothers of children with cystic fibrosis reported a persistent emotional sorrow, they felt they were able to normalize their daily routines. In contrast, mothers of children with ADHD reported little family support, high perception of child-related demands, and less confidence in their success in mothering these children. In describing their daily routines, these mothers often stated that there was no such thing as a normal day. They felt constantly on alert and did not feel that they had normal routines. Based on this study, mothers of children with ADHD felt distress because their child did not easily conform to social standards, and were likely to express exhaustion in their role as mother. The pattern of responses offered by these participants differs significantly from that of the participants whose children have cystic fibrosis, and from the usual pattern of coping with chronic childhood disability documented in the literature. (Cronin, A. F. pp. 8392) While parenting behaviours have direct effects on childrens behavioural outcomes, other, more distal factors also may be shaping the way a mother handles parenting responsibilities. Dispositional factors are likely to be a major influence in determining how one parents. Although researchers have studied the relationships among maternal
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dispositional factors, parenting, and child behaviours, few studies have examined these relationships when the child is at developmental risk. Children with developmental delays evidence elevated clinical level behaviour problems, so this group is of primary interest in the search for precursors to psychopathology. The present study, Parenting children with and without developmental delay: the role of self-mastery, conducted in L.A,USA,with authors Paczkowski E, and Baker BL.,examined how the maternal dispositional trait of self-mastery, as well as supportive and non-supportive parenting, relate to behaviour problems in young children with and without developmental delay. Participants were 225 families, drawn from Central Pennsylvania and Southern California. The children, all aged 4 years, were classified as delayed (n = 97) or nondelayed (n = 128). The Self-Mastery Scale measured perceived level of control over life events. The Coping with Childrens Negative Emotions Scale measured different ways parents perceive themselves as reacting to their childrens distress and negative affect. The Child Behavior Checklist assessed childrens behaviour problems. Delayed condition mothers reported significantly more child behaviour problems than non-delayed condition mothers; the two conditions did not differ in self-mastery, supportive parenting, or non-supportive parenting. Self-mastery, non- supportive parenting reactions, and child behaviour problems all related significantly to one another. For the sample as a whole and within the delayed condition, the association between self-mastery and child behaviour problems was partially mediated by nonsupportive parenting reactions, although self-mastery was still significantly associated with problem behaviour. In the non-delayed condition, although significant relationships also were found among the variables of interest, non-supportive parenting did not have a significant main or mediation effect. Delay status moderated the relationship between negative parenting reactions and child behaviour problems, assessed by the Child
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Behavior Checklist Total and Internalizing scores. When mothers displayed low levels of non-supportive reactions, children in the delayed and non-delayed groups had similar levels of total problem behaviour. However, when mothers were medium or high in nonsupportive reactions, children in the delayed group had much higher levels of problem behaviours than those in the non-delayed group. Therefore we could say that the present study extended research on parental dispositional factors and parenting by measuring self-mastery as a global personality trait rather than measuring self-efficacy related specifically to childrearing. Moreover, relationships were examined for both developmentally delayed and non-delayed samples, allowing for a clearer understanding of the influences on problem behaviours in children with developmental delays. The findings support the view that parenting behaviours have a greater impact on children at developmental risk. (Paczkowski E,Baker BL. >http://trisomydisorders.wordpress.com/2011/01/10/parenting-children-

with-and-without-developmental-delay-the-role-of-self-mastery) Another study entitled Adjustment and Attitude of Parents of Children with Mental Retardation by Vidhya Ravindranadan and Raju,S. Vidhya Ravindranadan, is Research Scholar in the Department of Psychology,University of Kerala while Raju, S., PhD is presently Reader in Psychology, Department of Psychology. University of Kerala, Kariavattom, Kerala. This study takes places in the University of Kerala, Thiruvananthapuram. Their respondents are those parents (either mother or father) of children diagnosed as mentally retarded. The purpose of their study is to attempts to ascertain the level of adjustment and attitude of parents of children with mental retardation. The results have indicated that parental attitude is the only variable which shows a significant difference among the subjects grouped on the basis of religion. There exist
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no significant difference among the groups of subjects on the basis of education in all the variables. The results also imply that there exists significant difference between rural and urban parents only in social adjustment and parental attitude and not in other variables. The subjects of lower and higher income did not show any significant difference in none of the variables. Behari and Ruchi (p.44) conducted a study on maternal attitude and child rearing practices of mentally retarded children. The sampleconsisted of 60 mothers, of which 30 are less educated and low socio-economic class(group1) and 30 well educated upper middle class mothers (group2). The study investigated the attitude of mothers towards their mentallyretarded sons in 23 areas of child rearing the result revealed significant differencesbetween group 1 and group 2 in respect of 7 areas of child rearing practices.However, Rao, (p.27) conducted a study on Behaviour disorders in moderately mentally retarded children and the relation to parental attitude. The sample comprised of parents of 60 moderately mentally retardedboys and girls. The findings of this studyindicated that parents have a negative attitude towards their children with mental retardation. The most important implication of this study is the need for uplifting the parents social and psychological well-being. It is expected that it will help the parents to deal effectively withtheir children having problem. Rao (p.27). The conclusion of this study is to indicated that parental religion, income, and education do not have any significant influence on adjustment variables, but there is change in parental attitude among different religious groups. Locality of parents influences only on the dimensions of social adjustment and parental attitude.( Behari, M., & Ruchi, K. p.44). A longitudinal study hosted by Angold et. al. on1998 about The perceived

parental burden and service use for child and adolescent psychiatric disorders that
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would describes the predictors of viewed parental burdens and its impact on the use of specialty mental health and school disorders. Briefly, a representative sample of 45000, 9-11, and 13-yearsolds, identified through the student information management system of the public school systems in 11 countries in western North Carolina. A screening questionnaire was given to parents that consist of 55 questions about childs behavioral problems. Children with depressive or anxiety disorders proved less burdensome than children with other disorders. While parents with preexisting mental health problems perceived more burdens showed that again levels of childs sypmtomatology and functional impairment had the most effect on parental perceived burden scores. The presence of perceived burden was associated with at least a fivefold increase in the rate of service use. When child had both diagnosis and impairment, the presence of perceived burden was associated with threefold increase in the use of specialist mental health service. Furthermore, it also appears that most effects of symptomatology and impairement on service use were mediated by perceived parental burden. The psychological burdens described by parents as resulting from their childrens problems suggest that this issue is worthy of more attention. Parents who attributed burden to their children were likely to seek specialty health services for their children and their children were also more likely to receive school services. On the study about Parenting stress in mothers and fathers of toddlers with autism spectrum disorders in associations with child characteristics by Davis and Carter on the year 2008 delineates childrens functioning that contribute to the different components of parenting stress that may aid in developing and refining parent-focused interventions. Participants in this study were the first 54 American families ( 108 parent,
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54 mothers and 54 fathers)participating in a larger longitudinal study in which both mothers and fathers completed relevant questionnaires. The study accounts that high levels of stress are present in mothers when their children are quite young, as well as fathers share same levels of stress. Given the unique challenges in raising ASD, it is not surprising that many mothers and fathers evidence high level of stress. Also of note is that at least half parents studied did not evidence significant levels of parenting stress and depressive symptoms while at the same time that may families cope to the disease. A second important finding from the study is that parents of toddlers with ASD share highly concordant view of their childs behavior due to autism symptoms and socio-emotional and behavior problems and delays in acquisition of competencies their children. The fact also that the study provide that parental depression has no relationship between parental depression and parents report about their childrens functioning suggests that parental depression play less of a role in parental appraisal in childrens behavior with ASD. The central finding of the study is that there are different aspects of childrens behaviors are predictive of parenting stress. Competencies and behavioral problems are also perceived as

stressful and varies across parents and types of parenting stress. The most common predictor of parenting stress was the delays and deficits in social skills by children with ASD. In addition, behavior problems that are not clinical manifestations of ASD were also associated with parental stress. Mothers were affected by childrens difficulty with self regulation skills ( ADLs). For fathers externalizing behaviors were the primary noncore autism behavior that was associated with stress. Surprisingly, cognitive and verbal functioning were not salient predictors of stress for mothers or fathers and were only associated with fathers perception of child difficulty.

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Because social relatedness is at the very core of autism and deficits are the focus of much of the autism intervention and the fact that these characteristics are most stressful for parents is important for professionals to know when working with families of young children. As families learn about autism , parenting stress due to limited social relatedness may diminish. Families who are experiencing significant levels of stress immediately following their childs diagnosis, these highlight the need for family interventions to take into considerations the ways in which parents experiences are unique. According to Coffey, Kenneth M and Obringer, S John entitled A Case Study on Autism: School Accommodations and Inclusive Settings on 2004 at Washington, DC.The parents disagreed on the different long-term educational goals for the younger,
more seriously involved child. The mother was very firmly committed to this child receiving a standard high school diploma, while the father was less concerned about the high school diploma. They concurred on the developmental history of the children. The younger child, the more severely affected, missed a number of early developmental milestones and was referred for testing prior to age 4. Concerns about the older child did not arise until he approached school age. The family psychosocial stressors related to parenting two children with autism spectrum disorder. Both parents agreed they faced considerable stress and provided detailed examples of specific psychosocial Stressors. For example, the husband wants his spouse to keep abreast of the advances in autism and advocate for the children. Conversely, the wife wishes he would share in this role. Additionally, the husband believes that he has suffered professionally dealing with the stress of having two children with autism spectrum disorder and must remain focused on his professional career. The daily activities and routines of family life both parents agreed that apart from church involvement the family
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has few outside interests or social activities. Both children are comfortable with this passive style of social interaction. The atmosphere within a small school was one feature that contributed to their children's success. The parents believed that a smaller school with a reduced pupil-teacher ratio provided more flexibility and a greater willingness to accommodate. Also, home visits by the teacher are encouraged. The small school with a single K-12 campus facilitated a smooth transition from grade to grade. Due to the infrequency of multiple incidence autism, little has been written concerning the supports required by a family with such challenges. A teacher or related service provider might not be inclined to picture a family with multiple incidences of autism as having the ability to function successfully in the community and school, but with multiple supports this appears to be the case. (Sarsoza, Jose. pp.65-67)

A study conducted by Fayyad JA, Farrah L. and Cassir Y. on the year 2010 entitled Dissemination of an evidence-based intervention to parents of children with behavioral problems in a developing country in the Department of Psychiatry and

Clinical Psychology, Faculty of Medicine, Balamand University, Ashrafieh, Beirut, Lebanon. This project describes the dissemination of an evidence-based parenting skills intervention and aims to train social and health workers with little or no mental health background so that they themselves train mothers of children with behavioral problems in impoverished communities in a developing country. The Strengths and Difficulties Questionnaire was completed by mothers to screen for children with behavioral problems and was repeated at the end of the intervention. Pre- and post-tests of knowledge and parenting attitudes were administered to mothers. Mental health workers trained social and health workers in

36

social development centers and dispensaries. Each social and health worker trained mothers of children with behavioral problems under supervision utilizing an Arabic adaptation of the treatment manual for externalizing disorders "Helping Challenging Children" developed by the Integrated Services Taskforce of the World Psychiatric Association Child Mental Health Presidential Programme. A total of 20 workers and 87 mothers participated in the training. The proportion of children who obtained an SDQ total difficulties score in the abnormal range decreased from 54.4 to 19.7% after the training. Whereas 40.2% of mothers used severe corporal punishment with their children before the intervention, this decreased to 6.1% post-intervention. Three-fourths of mothers related that the program helped them develop new parenting skills. (Fayyad JA, Farrah L. and Cassir Y. > http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/14763639)

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The Problem Statement of the problem This study aims to answer the problem: What is the lived experience of mothers caring for other than normal children. Statement of the objective: The main objective of this study is to explain the lived experiences of mothers caring other than normal children. Significance of the study The study is important to the nursing practice, mothers having children other than normal, community, families, and to the nursing profession. Mother This study help the mothers broaden their knowledge in taking good care of children with autism specially other caregivers, this help them understand the life situation they are in to because we all know that this situation is not an easy responsibility, because having children other than normal is quite different from having normal children. This requires more patience, understanding, attention, and love. Family This study helps the families in coping with their situation and also helps them improve their caring abilities towards other than normal children. This enables them to highlight pre-existing problems and let them understand situation related to parenting.

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This helps to cope successfully with their extra demands and extra stress and also helps them in preparing themselves in changing behavior towards the child. Community The result of the study increases the level of understanding of the community regarding the experiences of mothering other than normal children. It provides information, direction, and assistance for a family or relative who have a special child. Nursing Practice Nursing is an educative instrument, a maturing force that aims to promote forward movement of personality in the direction of creative, constructive, personal, and community living. In relation in the above statement, this study helps in the improvement of the practice of nursing by providing relevant findings for the advancement of care strategies. Student Nurses As healthcare providers, student nurses gain information about caring other than normal children. This helps the students to have a proper guidance to facilitate the dissemination of the information by teaching the mother with a special child as well as the community and any other concern citizens about taking care of the child. The student nurses can also be instrumental in providing anticipatory guidance to assist families to cope with stressors in the transition to parenting and coping especially during the first year of life in caring other than normal children.

Scope and limitation

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Scope of the study This particular study is focused on explaining experiences of mothers caring for other than normal children. Limitation of the study The study is deals with the experiences of mothers taking care of children other than normal. Other than normal children, whom this study categorizes, are those children with Autistic disorder. The study is conducted only under the vicinity of Dumaguete city with its 30 barangays. The feedback the respondents adhere is depicting the situations they are in to, with in their experienced life in Dumaguete city. For this, the results of this study might not be hold true for mothers having children other than normal residing in other places because experiences will vary depending into where was and what is its environment. The study is focused only on the experiences either good, bad,

rewarding, or whatsoever as long as it defines the mother-child relationship which this study is trying to understand. The respondents is treated fairly and equal and without bias. This is to ensure the validity of data.

Researcher Methodology

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Research Design This research is a phenomenological qualitative study. In the human sphere, this normally translates into gathering deep information and perceptions through inductive, qualitative methods such as interviews, discussions and participant observation and representing it from the perspective of the research participants. The purpose of the phenomenological approach is to illuminate the specific and to identify the phenomena, through how they are perceived by the actors in a situation. The researcher makes use of Collaizis Method for the data analysis of the study, which provides a rich description of the essential structure of the phenomenon. Collaizi method comprises of seven steps. (1) Reading all protocols to acquire a feeling for them. (2)Receiving each protocol and extract each significant statement. (3) Spelling out the measuring of each significant statement. (4) Organizing the formulated measuring into themes. (5) Integrating results into an exhaustive description of the phenomenon under the study. (6) Formulating an exhaustive of the phenomenon under the study in as unequivocal a statement of identification as possible. (7) Asking participants about the finding as final validating step. Another method that will be use is the Husserlian Method. Philosophical

discipline originated by Edmund Husserl. Husserl developed the phenomenological method to make possible a descriptive account of the essential structures of the directly given. Phenomenology emphasizes the immediacy of experience, the attempt to isolate it and set it off from all assumptions of existence or causal influence and lay bare its essential structure. Phenomenology restricts the philosopher's attention to the pure data of consciousness, uncontaminated by metaphysical theories or scientific assumptions. Husserl's concept of the life-world
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as the individual's personal world as directly experiencedexpressed this same idea of immediacy. With the appearance of the Annual for Philosophical and Phenomenological Research (191330), under Husserl's editorship, his personal philosophizing flowered into an international movement. Its most notable adherents were Max Scheler and Martin Heidegger. ( Britannica Concise Encyclopedia.
Copyright 1994-2008 Encyclopdia Britannica,

Inc.http://encyclopedia2.thefreedictionary.com/Husserlian+phenomenology> Research Environment The City of Dumaguete is a city in the Philippine province of Negros Oriental. It is the capital, principal seaport, and largest city of the province. According to the year 2000 census, it has a population of 102,265 people. A person from Dumaguete is called a "Dumagueteo". The city is nicknamed The City of Gentle People coined by the late Dr. Jose Rizal. Dumaguete is referred to as a university town because of the presence of four universities and a number of other colleges where students of the province converge to enroll for tertiary education. The study was conducted specifically in Dumaguete West City Exceptional Child Learning Center. It is a located just beside West City Elementary School. The learning center is only meant for children with special needs which includes, hearing and visual impairments and Autism disorders. The learning Center is a two storey building. Each floor has four rooms and a wooden stair on both sides. On the first floor, there is a small canteen where children ate and buy their meals. And on the second floor, on both ends, there is a waiting area for mothers who supervised their children attending the learning center, although some will just go there just to fetch their child. The area surrounding
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the Learning Center is crowded with students both coming from the elementary school and from the learning center especially during recess and breaks. The floors in each storey are very clean as well as inside each room. Each room is specially designed depending on the type of disability the room is occupied for. On the rooms were mentally impaired students are belong; their chairs are arranged depending on whose student is occupying this is to ensure that each student will be accommodated effectively. Research Respondents The subject of this study falls on the criteria as follows: A. Mother (regardless the age group she may belong); (1) must not be a single parent, (2) Living within the vicinity of Dumaguete city, (3) with or without a stable job, (4) caring a child/children diagnosed of having an Autism living with her that belongs to any age group and must be attending a special education class. Other specification will not be limit to the subject as long as the criteria mentioned above are achieved. Research instrument It is clear that in doing activities where truth and reality is the aim to understand, correct selection and utilization or usage of instruments to be used must be addressed promptly. The gathering of data on this study is based on the main As a mother, what are your experiences in taking care of your child with special needs? Subject will be provided with a questionnaire having the main question. Thus, demographic data is also included. This is for the proponents to have a cross reference or significant data of the subject they have. Audio recorders and digital cameras are also be using as well if situation requires. These identified gadgets and devices are going to be used while

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interview is going on. Functionality and reliability of these devices and gadgets are satisfactorily double-checked and tested prior to its usage. Sampling Procedure Convenience sampling is also known as grab, opportunity, accidental or haphazard sampling. With this method, the researcher uses subjects that are easy to reach. As the name describes, the researcher chooses subjects because

of convenience. Some examples of convenience sampling are when students use their classmates in a research study or a television reporter interviews people on the street. Convenience sampling is a nonprobability method. This means that subjects are chosen in a nonrandom manner, and some members of the population have no chance of being included. With nonprobability sampling, researchers have no way of calculating how well their sample represents considered the to population be more as a whole. and In general, than

probability sampling is

stringent

accurate

nonprobability sampling, but it is not always feasible. When time or cost is a factor, some researchers might

use convenience sampling. It is often used in pilot or exploratory studies when the researcher wants an inexpensive and quick way to discern whether further research is warranted. Many social science studies use convenience sampling with students, paid volunteers or clients.(What is convenience sampling?,> http://www.wisegeek.com/whatis-convenience-sampling.htm) Researchers use convenience sampling not just because it is easy to use, but because it also has other research advantages. The subjects are selected just because they are easiest to recruit for the study and the researcher did not consider selecting subjects that are representative of the entire population. In pilot studies, convenience
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sample is usually used because it allows the researcher to obtain basic data and trends regarding his study without the complications of using a randomized sample. This sampling technique is also useful in documenting that a particular quality of a substance or phenomenon occurs within a given sample. Such studies are also very useful for detecting relationships among different phenomena. When using convenience sampling, it is necessary to describe how your sample would differ from an ideal sample that was randomly selected. It is also necessary to describe the individuals who might be left out during the selection process or the individuals who are overrepresented in the sample. In connection to this, it is better if you can describe the possible effects of the people who were left out or the subjects that are overrepresented to your results. This will allow the readers of your research to get a good grasp of the sample that you were testing. It will also enable them to estimate the possible difference between your results and the results from the entire population. (CONVENIENCE SAMPLING APPLIED TO RESEARCH, >

http://www.experiment-resources.com/convenience-sampling.html#ixzz1axWfdNBQ Advantages of convenience sampling

Convenience sampling is very easy to carry out with few rules governing how the sample should be collected.

The relative cost and time required to carry out a convenience sample are small in comparison to probability sampling techniques. This enables you to achieve the sample size you want in a relatively fast and inexpensive way.

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The convenience sample may help you gather useful data and information that would not have been possible using probability sampling techniques, which require more formal access to lists of populations.

to make generalisations from your sample to the populationyou are studying.

(Convenience sampling: An overview >http://dissertation.laerd.com/articles/convenience -sampling-an-overview.php)

Procedure of data gathering Gathering the data is the one of the most crucial part of this study. Accuracy, reliability, quality, adequacy, and relevance are only the basic factors that must take first into account when gathering the data. As mentioned, a questionnaire having the demographic data and the main question is the research instrument that the researcher is going utilized in order to gather the necessary data. To start the data gathering procedure, with the use of Convenience sampling method, those individuals that qualifies the selected criteria are going to be considered our respondents. The researcher in pair will go to Dumaguete
West City Exceptional Child Learning Center to visit a Special Education Class. The

researcher is then select possible subjects to this study (this is after the letter of permission from the proper authorities has already been signed and approved). During the meeting with the subject, researcher introduces themselves and explains the background and purpose of the study. If possible the place of the meeting must be properly selected and manipulated base from the ultimate convenience of the subject and must be in her preference as long as the place will be free from interruption and outside influences. Then consent signing and contract setting is obtain by the
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researcher before proceeding to the actual data gathering. After the consent is already signed and fully understand by the subject she is then asked by the researcher to fill up the demographic data first followed by the question As a mother, what are your experiences in taking care of your child with special needs? During the data gathering process the researcher undertaking the question and answer process is staying to facilitate the subject while answering. In times the subject cannot well explicate her answer with the question, the researcher must prepare a readymade follow up questions to facilitate the subject. After the question and answer process and sufficient data is already obtain respondent is thanked after. Thus, researcher assures their subjects that whatever information obtain from them is always kept in strict confidential. Any relationship formed from the interview is terminated and proceed to the next phase of the data analysis.

Operational Definition of Terms Lived Experience Lived experience, as defined by the proponents and use in this study, are those activities which involves an individual that eventually leads to the gaining of knowledge or understanding and skill or in vice versa. Caring

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For this study, the proponents define caring as any activity that promotes, maintain, and advance the care given to a child regardless the structure, the way it is executed, and as well as its principles of doing so. Autism
Autism is a disorder that affects the social, emotional, and behavioral development of children. Autism is marked by serious difficulties in interacting and communicating with

other people. Other symptoms may include constantly repeating certain actions or behaviors, or having intense interests restricted to only particular things or topics. Symptoms of autism usually appear before the age of three and can last the rest of a persons lifetime. Autism is at least four times more common in boys than in girls. Mother

CHAPTER II Presentation, Analysis, and Interpretation of Data

Theme no.1: Worries on the exceptional care given to child Respondent #1: Nabalaka nako kay 2 years old na dili pa siya kabalong mulakaw, gi sige na namu praktisan pero wala ra gihapon Respondent #3: I was so afraid at first. It is because Im thinking what will happen to my child when I got old. I asked myself that who will take care to my child..I am afraid that he get too fat that would cause him sickness, so Im controlling his meals
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Respondent #4: I keep on thinking as he get older of how will I give him the normal life the same as other normal children Respondent #5: Mahadlok ko usahay kay basun dili nako mahatag ang mga kahinanglanon sa akong anak.Gabalaka gni ko usahay sa akong anak sige ra biya siya kaadmitAkong mga igsoon ra man ang ga.atiman sa akong anak atong bata pa siya ky mahadlok man ko basun magkina.unsa nang bata, bata pa man gud ko ato Respondent #6: Mahadlok ko sa kondisyon sa iyang kasing kasing kay tambok biya na siya basun maputos ba ug tambok..Magproblema ra ko kay dugay na siya mukaon, mulihok, bisan maligo, ug mumata Respondent #9: .there was denial coupled with anger and apprehension on how to raise a child with special needs, this really worries me since she is my first-born,,,, Her condition really worries me because of her late development. I am thinking about what she will become when she got older with that condition Worries are never be remove from the mothers having a child with disabilities especially when the child is in illness state.

Theme no.2: Difficulty in handling the child Respondent #1:Lisod kaayu among kahimtang ato kay masakiton kaayu siya gamay sikil magsakit dayun siyaLisod gyud kaayu siya ehandle kay masakiton, buluyagon, kahinanglan pa ug adjustments Respondent #2: In my case, as a mother, it is not easy to have a child with special needs..Its also not easy for me to take care for her when time of sickness, because she cannot take medicine easily Respondent #3: Caring my child is not easy because he is not the same compared to other children. There are times that I need to be absent just to be with him when he is going to be admitted Respondent #5: Gatabanganay ra mi sa akong mga igsoon sa pagbantay niya sa hospital kay kapoy biya kaayu magatiman ug ingon aning bata Respondent #6: Kapuyan pod ko usahay samut na kung sige siya pabuyag nako, maghilak gani ko usahay Respondent #8: Pait kayo ug magkaanak ug autistic, kay lahi ra gyud ang akong anak buluyagon ug dili kasabot unsa iya ganahan. Respondent #9: ..it was really a struggle on how to raise her compared with a normal child and little expectations in return
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Researchers at the University of Washington Autism Center asked mothers about their experiences and found that moms of children with autism had higher levels of parenting-related stress and psychological distress than mothers of children with developmental delay. Children's problem behavior was associated with increases in both parenting-related stress and distress in both groups, but this relationship was stronger in mothers of children with autism (Jeffrey Munson, PhD >speechlanguage-pathology-audiology.advanceweb.com/editorial/content/editorial.aspx? cc=210578)

Theme no. 3: Depression from the condition of the child

Respondent #1: "Na depress ko kay ang akong anak dili normal tungod ra pod sa akong binuhatan nga dili angay Respondent #4: Maguol ko kung sige siya ug pabuyag nako. Kusog siya musukol, manumbag siya, mangusi dayon manangas pod ug bisag unsa Respondent #5: Maguol ko kanang mga panahon nga mahospital siya dayun ako nga iyang inahan wala ko sa iyang tapad Respondent #6: Maguol ko usahay kung dili siya mukaon, ako ra siya ulog ulogan, kaon na,kaon na dayun mu ingon ra man na siya unya ra, sayo pa Respondent #7: Maguol pod ko usahay kung makahunahuna ko niya ug iyang gibati kay dili man unta na iyang sala nganung naingon ana siya. Respondent #8: Makaguol gyud ko ug maayo kay ako nga iyang inahan dili siyan usahay mutoo nako

Chapter III Summary of Findings, Conclusions, and Recommendations

Summary of Findings

Mothers caring a child with Autistic disorder are commonly experiencing worries, difficulties and depression with regards to the overall welfare of their child with special needs. 70% of the 10 respondents report that the worries of mothers with Autistic child
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are nevertheless one of the common concerns they are experiencing throughout the course of their care to their child with special needs. These worries are all towards the status of their childs condition in long term basis. Difficulties are also part of their experience as 70% of the total respondent states that these difficulties are often their common complains in dealing with their child with special needs. These difficulties comprise not only the exceptional care that the child requires but also the dealing of the behaviors that their child with special needs is manifesting. Depression in mothers with special needs is also shown in 60% of the respondents statements. This emotional task varies among the respondents but all points out into one direction, the emotional tendencies of mothers having a child with special needs.

Conclusions

It already understood that caring Work cited BOOK:

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Map of Dumaguete City

<http://images.search.yahoo.com/search/images?_adv_prop=image&fr=yfp-t-701-s&va=dumaguete+map

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Foundation University College Of Nursing Dumaguete city

September 30, 2011

PROF.NENITA P. TAYKO,RN,MAN Dean College of Nursing Foundation University Good Day Maam, We are third year student nurses of foundation University College of Nursing (FUCN) currently enrolled in Nursing Research (NRES) for this semester. As a requirement for the said subject necessary for our course, we are going to conduct a study which entitled A lived experience of mothering other than normal children: A phenomenological study. In relation to this we are asking for your permission to allow us conduct this said study in the area of Dumaguete city with the college under your management and guidance. We are hoping for your positive response.

Sincerely yours, Joles Nick B. Emerenciana Group Leader

Noted by: MS.MELANIE MAE O. AUSTERO,RN,MAEd.MN Research Adviser

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