Williams 1 Danielle Williams WRD 103 Professor Garvey 29 January 2012

Gender & Language It is often said that women have the gift of gab or more simply put by the opinions of many women talk entirely too much. Is there any validity to this statement or could it be possible that the supposedly non-sociable, one-word-answer, men in this world talk just as much? Through observation of gender-mixed groups I plan to analyze the conversational patterns of both men and women. Are women the most dominant in the conversation because theyre more vocal or are men more dominant in the aspect that when they talk everyone tends to listen? These are all questions pivotal to examining the difference between gender languages if indeed there is any difference at all. In accordance with popular belief, I believe that women will indeed dominate general conversation in a mixed gender group purely because women tend to be more talkative and expressive in conversations. In arguments, debates and conversations Ive partaken in women are often both the initiators and the ones to have the last word. This becomes evident in almost all of my everyday conversations which led me to believe that during my observation women would be more dominant primarily because of frequency. Women tend to say more but it may have the same value as a guy saying less so how does one measure who is more dominant? This is where gender can come into play. A woman can go on and on in a conversation but dont mistake this for dominance. More than often, even if the woman is going on and on she can become completely silent when the male speaks. This is dominance on the males behalf.

Williams 2

For this investigation I listened in on two groups. One group consisted of four females and three males and it took place in a dorm room setting. The second group consisted of three females and two males and took place in a cafeteria setting. Women have a more complicated thought process than men. As pointed out by Tony Kornheiser, women dont think things are as simple as men do so their conversation is more selective and prolonged. This was valid during my observation of both groups. In both groups one of the females initiated conversation with a random statement. It was more than likely about school, classes, or home and one of the guys would add in a word or two; very short and simple statements. For example one of the females stated I wish we had a two week spring break. It sucks that we only get one week and its probably not even around the same time other schools get their break. I mean whats so bad about giving us an extra week.. She goes on about it and one of the guys just said I cant wait to get hammered during the break in a very nonchalant type of way. The guys said what they needed to and were quiet whereas the females were more expressive and elaborated a little more. This went on for about fifteen minutes until the conversation takes an inevitable turn. Amongst first year college students/ teenagers, relationships and sex are topics that are going to eventually be discussed in group one I noticed that when sex became a topic the guys had more female conversation tendencies. When one of the females said My boyfriend wants to have sex all the timewhy are guys such horn-dogs the guys immediately looked at each other and laughed. Then they had expressions as if they were being selective of what to say, they were more vocal on the matter. They went so far as to give the girls advice on what guys like. This is where I doubted my hypothesis; seeing that the guys werent dominating the conversation not in a chatty aspect but more dominant in the fact that the females were dead silent and interested in what the guys had to say. When one of the last

Williams 3

guys finally offered his opinion about relationships by saying girls should be more open to giving and trying new things, instead of being a snooze in the sack, it was shut down by the whole room of females. Objections by all the females just encouraged him to be quiet. None of the other guys came to his aid or agreed with him. However, he did argue his point before being quiet. In group two the conversation went on for about ten minutes with the girls gossiping about current events and Guy 1 is just listening but finally gets fed up and changes the subject in a why should you care type of tone. The females would start off every other sentence with Did you hear about Sarah and one of the guys would just role his eyes. This action led me to believe that maybe guys are irritated by the chattiness of women or maybe just the womens choice of topic. Women choose to talk in detail about day to day things that go on which the guys feel is less important than their topics of sports, women and sex. In group two the guys were more dominant and open to conversation than the males in the first group as far as him trying to steer the females away from girly topics such as gossip. This group conversation soon turned to the topic of intercourse. When a woman is absolutely positive about any argument or statement she is presenting a man better be ready to fight to the end if he has any rebuttal. With this being said, in the second group Guy 1 made straight forward statements and stood firm in his arguments about relationships stating that Girls arent appreciative enough. We can never do enough for you all and when we do things you have a hard time accepting it if it isnt done right. Like why does a man have to get on one knee to propose? Theres nothing wrong with the girls knees so how about you get on yours when I propose and make the situation easier for me. What if Im fifty and have bad knees?. He then got ridiculed by all three females because they felt differently.

Williams 4

However, the difference this time is that the second guy became more verbal with this topic as well and came to his rescue by saying things like hes right, females should With both guys in sync in Group 2, even though there were three females there seemed to be no dominant gender in the conversation. The playing field became equal because the males were now talking just as much as the females. In closing this observation one may ask if male and females have different languages. Absolutely, I found that females tend to speak more frequently and prolong their conversation whereas males like to keep it short sweet and simple. However, does this make the woman more dominant? No, my hypothesis of women being more dominant in conversation was proven to be false. The length of dialogue spoken by one gender does not determine whos dominant in the conversation; its the value upon the words spoken. Men and women can say the same thing in different lengths and be equal as far as dominance which is what I found in both observations. The major variable that many people dont consider is the subject. It was evident that in both groups women started as the more frequent talkers but once a subject that interested the males came up they were just as vocal. Therefore, its safe to say that yes women talk.but men talk too when the subject is worth speaking on.