BETWEEN MENTOR AND MENTEE: INTERDEPENDENCE, GROWTH AND FULFILMENT

The road to maturity, mastery and proficiency stem from self-consciousness, self-discipline and self-determination. On this premise, the aspiring professional must then tap into the cistern of experience of an expert in her/his field. This gives rise to the mentor-mentee relationship, a crucial stage in the growth of a young aspiring professional. The benefits of such a relationship as experienced by many transcend just the acquisition of skills and knowledge. It may establish ones career vista, job, leadership proclivities (other talents that may be hidden) and in some cases, depending on the strength of the relationship, spiritual advancement and deep mutual respect and love. How can one enter this realm of growth and fulfillment between the mentor and mentee? The answer to this question will serve the scope of this essay. It is good to note that a one-one relationship is not the only way people get mentored. Mentorship could come from books, tapes etc. However, one-one relationships during ones career development are of immense advantage. Focusing your energies in a fruitful relationship is rewarding and you are assured of whom to run to in times of adversity in your career development and sometimes even personal problems. The role of the mentor is of crucial importance to the success of this relationship. It is not enough to have greater skill, experience and the authority of knowledge, to make an impartation. The hallmarks of success are the underlying human virtues that embody empathy, connection, belief in human potentiality and good listening skills. The mentors humility and sincere desire to empower are tantamount to spontaneous growth for the mentee. The role of love and compassion and yet firmness cannot be overemphasized. Timely words of encouragement and praise are critical for the mentee to climb to higher challenges and opportunities. A most rewarding experience for the mentor is to observe the mentee growing and responding to mentorship. This important development has a resultant effect on the mentor, setting her or him on higher mental and spiritual pedestals, and giving more energy and encouragement to absorb new protg. It is beyond the scope of this essay to discuss the different approaches used in mentoring a student. However, a good understanding and regular discourse between mentor and mentee would be beneficial. In the main, the key to growth is independence on the part of the mentee. Apart from being proactive, the mentee must have initiative, be sensitive to her needs and the needs and prerogative of her mentor. Sincerity and honesty are core values for the

mentee. The ability to openly discuss her shortcomings and areas of difficulty will assist the mentor in knowing the best possible means to achieving growth for the mentee. Most mentors are swamped with work, responsibility and set targets and goals. The wise mentee must know patience and empathy when making demands on the mentor. Although the responsibility for integrity is high with the mentor, this must not be lacking in the mentee for a successful relationship to occur. Loyalty and respect are indispensable. The ideal mentor-mentee relationship is interdependent. The fastest way for the mentee to learn from the mentor is in the process of creativity, initiative, taking risks and not being afraid to make mistakes in the aspiration to grow. Lessons to be learnt therefore should be based on something concrete, real and experiential. The role model function is also of import to the mentee. Observing the mentor work and relate effectively in real life situations leaves a lasting impression on the mentee. It is indeed conceivable that real joy could be experienced in the mentor-mentee relationship. The mentor knows fulfillment in the true sense of the word and the mentee gradually becomes a professional with increased confidence and competencies. Herein lies a way to permeate a system, society and environment with skills, knowledge, values, ethics etc. These, where applicable, would have undergone a constructive processing in the context of interdependence.

Stephen M. Awoyemi