The Giger Chronicles

Road Kill In The Fast Lane

A Very Special and Well Known Case of Aggressive Lifestyles in The Passing Lane

A play by Pamela Olson

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
Page 1 of 38

Copyright 20 2 !y Pamela Olson All rights reserved" All wrongs revenged" #t$s a story" Se%!lance to anyone is not intended &&nor sho'ld !e inferred" Savvy( %ate)

*oc Severinsen+s There #s A ,irl http-..www"yo't'!e"co%.watch)v/01,0S2dc&s3

A grad'ate of College of 0arin then Sono%a State 4niversity( in the %iddle of The A%erican Wine Co'ntry( California 4SA( Planet Earth, il!y "ay, Pamela Olson is A 0arin Co'nty Vol'nteer of the 3ear( fo'nding !oard %e%!er 5orth 6ay 0'lti%edia Association(

#ome $esigner, Raconte%r, Gardener, "i&e,

Ti%e Traveler( Swi%%er( Veteran( 0a%a(

Friend, Real Estate A%thority, 'allroom $ancer,

Color 7'n8ie( 6on vivant( Professor( A'thor( and

Landlord 9:traordinaire ;
a8a opinionated"

ay all yo%r storms be (eathered, and all that is good get better)

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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Cast
ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside

7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward

LA5C9 as played !y 7a%ie 6ell

9*,A> as played !y 0att S%ith

9L9KT>A as played !y ?rances ?isher

?ATA 0=>,A5A as played !y 7oanna L'%ley

7#0 as played !y *wight 3oa8a%

C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 as played !y 5i88i 6lons8y

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci

*irector Adriana 6aer

Cost'%e *esigner 0#L95A CA5=59>=

G%est *tars + Cameo

AS#0= !y <onda as itself S49 <A0#LT=5 as Chef

7odie ?oster as 6A>>3 S#5?4L <er! Alpert as hi%self 6lind 0elon as the%selves The *ra%atics Cover as The *ra%atics

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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CAPTA#5 6LA*9 as played !y Ale: 0ins8y

T%nes
The Giger Chronicles Theme *ong
<er! Alpert 6ehind the >ain @ http-..www"%yspace"co%.her!alpert.%'sic.songs.!ehind&the&rain& al!'%&version&2ABA 2 6lind 0elon+s The P'sher @ http-..www"yo't'!e"co%.watch) v/7C45igVc66A The *ra%atics+ Whatcha See #s Whatcha ,et @ http-..www"yo't'!e"co%.watch)v/<Cw=d1y%pDo

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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Character $escriptions
5ote- Actors chosen here are for a%ong other reasons( their age( height( voice( and !ody type( as each is specific&critical to each character$s portrayal" 7" K" =LS=5- 5avy veteran P=E( nine years older than his wife AL#C9( %essy( short( charis%atic( fat( eyes spec'lative( 0asters degree in 0'sic( retired 6and *irector >edwood <igh School( Lar8sp'r" Char%ing( insec're( talented( i%%at're( insincere( %oody( 8in8y( self&centered( coarse( sens'o's( sarcastic( o!sessed with controlling others( feels of solid land and rolling sea( cycle of desire and tyranny( passive aggressive( tense( i%aginative( sole%n( raffish( i%p'lsive( envio's of privilege and wealth( a %erry&go&ro'nd always on the verge of settling down( elitist( self&dra%atiFing selfish( tendency to loo8 li8e a s'llen child who had !een thwarted( oscillates rapidly thro'gh all 8inds of %oods( shir8s his responsi!ility to a defiant son and wife" Knows te%ptation and corr'ption well and drea%s so'ght then( and the !l'nders co%%itted in their p'rs'it( treachero's( arrogant( s'!d'ed war%th( 1'n8 food 1'n8ie( high str'ng( %anic depressive( conflicted( %erc'rial( capricio's( cynic( cross dresser( leather vinyl r'!!er !ondage %irror fetishes( in need of a hairc't( !allroo% dance instr'ctor( sailor( in scr'ffy loafers( sardonic( wears a wrin8led striped !'tton down collar shirt( had his sleeves rolled 'p his forear%s( in r'%pled( dar8( pleated and c'ffed tro'sers too !ig for hi%( and a hip length !lac8 leather aviator 1ac8et( also too large" The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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Anti&children racist anti&Se%itic anti&gay ho%opho!ic 7" K" =LS=5 lives at eG'ally anti&children racist anti&Se%itic anti&gay ho%opho!ic senior&only trailer par8 0arin Valley 0o!ile Co'ntry Cl'! in 5ovato( California since he was BB when he a!andoned his then H .2 %onth pregnant HB year old wife Alice after stealing IE %illion" <e is on the 6oard of *irectors of the 0arin Valley 0o!ile Co'ntry Cl'! as the Treas'rer" *rives a restored JAB Corvette he 8eeps 'p hi%self&& it shows" #s a top& of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar" *oes not play well with others" Started o't as a cool >eg 6lan8 K ended 'p a Conspic'o's Cons'%ption 3'ppie" *rin8s ,'ndlach 6'ndsch' Ca!ernet ?ranc or diet Pepsi" Teaches !allroo% dance at the 5ovato >ecreation *epart%ent"

Conspic'o's cons'%ption is e:travagant and ostentatio's e:pendit're" Conspic'o's cons'%ption is %eant not to satisfy any physical need( !'t rather to gratify the psychological craving for stat's or the favora!le opinion of others" The ter% was first 'sed !y the 4S sociologist and econo%ist Thorstein 6'nde Ve!len L ABM& J2JN in his AJJ !oo8 +The Theory =f The Leis're Class" A 3'ppie is a <ippie who sold o't and said +y'p+ to +the %an+"

ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<=- San >afael( 0arin Co'nty( California lawyer with 'nco%forta!le for hi% gho'l( span8ing( %irror se:( a!'se( shop lifter( and cop erotic a fetishes played o't in role&playing ga%es he pays others to do with hi% !'t later hates hi%self over doing it" #nsec're( 's'ally i%potent" Loves cocaine( high&heeled cow!oy !oots( The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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trashy loo8ing wo%en and to a!'se !ea'tif'l wo%en" 9nvio's of privilege and wealth" #s a top&of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" 4nderendowed( plays do%inate !'t is passive se:'ally" 6'lly and dor8" 6elieves what+s inside hi% and people doesn+t %atter( only apperances %atter" Peeping To%( self&ind'lgent and notorio's for Sewer Service( cheater( liar( staff a!'ser so high t'rn&over( and 1'st %a8es&'p evidence as he sleaFes along" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar" Voye'r" Lives in his office at BEM Hth Street San >afael( CA JHJ0 &2MEM" *rives a red >ange >over Sport with too %'ch %a8e 'p( as he thin8s he +needs+ a !ig vehicle to handle the treachero's 1o'rney to and fro% Star!'c8s each %orning" >ich %a%a paid for this 'ncool as it+s a two and a half ton tr'c8 with a centre of gravity so%ewhere dangero'sly in the stratosphere" *oes not play well with others" Conspic'o's Cons'%ptionist 3'ppie" <as 'ndisclosed ca%eras all over his office and ho%e" 9n1oys people+s !l'nders and 8ic8ing the% when they+re down" <as the %anner of an a!'ser who 8nows what he wants and cannot !e stopped" >eg'larly contracts o't wor8 to 7#0" *rin8s a triple ,ordon+s gin *irty 0artini with a co'ple PiG'illo Pepper St'ffed 0anFanilla =lives !y La Tienda" Sewer Service refers to the process&server who instead of %a8ing proper delivery( tosses the legal papers down the nearest sewer and does not atte%pt delivery so service was not acco%plished even tho'gh the servers later per1're the%selves in a co'rt&filed affidavit !y swearing they did %a8e delivery"

LA5C9- Lives at H2 0arina Vista Ave( Lar8sp'r( 0arin Co'nty( California JHJEJ( and 8eeps at The ,iger 6'ilding his San ?rancisco pied a terre( an A00 s"f dar8 hardwood waln't . %ahogany floor st'dio with cedar and %irrored shelved wal8&in closet with !r'shed nic8el %irrored wardro!e doors and a and a .2 !ath as his San ?rancisco pied a terre pentho'se" 5ever %arried Twin Cities Police The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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officer with co%forta!le va%pire erotica fetishes" *oes his 1o! well( his e:cellance is for his fetish life" Vegan( well&ad1'sted( %etrose:'al( pot 'ser( wiry( lithe( confident( easy& going( tri%( char%ing( 8ic8&!o:er( sardonic( 6ronFe !allroo% dancer" ,rad'ated >edwood <igh School" <as a 6achelors degree in 0'se'% St'dies fro% San ?rancisco State 4niversity" #s part ti%e sec'rity at the de 3o'ng 0'se'%" Always ar%ed personally with nine&ro'nd ,loc8 2M( five&ro'nd S%ith O Wesson sn'! nose "EA revolver( C>KT 4lti%a With 6lac8 6lade( >aider # 6oot Knife( %ace( r'!!er !'llets( !lan8 !'llets" #s a charis%a and char% top&of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" <as a Cary ,rant %anner( ti%ing and style a!o't hi%" Spea8s fl'ent ?rench" LA5C9 is 8nown for his preference for tri% do%inant older wo%en with elegant clothes who showed their appreciation of his gifts and talents &&which are large and considera!le as he+s well endowed" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar where he wor8s sec'rity three nights a wee8 at ,#,9>( Th'rsdays B p% to p% ?ridays( and Sat'rdays M p% to 2 a%" <e is one of the owners of ,#,9>" Plays well with others" <as ancient eyes" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding his drin8 in the pal% of his hand" Acco%plished card co'nter and 6lac81ac8 player" Cary ,rant( ,eorge Carlin( *o'glas Ada%s( >o!ert A" <einlein fan" AG'ari's( !ea'tif'lly tatooed" #n love with AL#C9" LA5C9 listens to 0iles *avis( Stan Kenton( <enry 0ancini( Ch'c8 0angione 7aFF" *rives a *'cati %otorcycle" <e inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s Perrier" The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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?riends with ,eorge *'8e( Ala'ra 9den( 7" >" <ilde!rand( ,ary ?isher( 6rande >oderic8( 7acG'ie Phelan( 7onny 0oseley( Ti% Lincec'%( Tyler ?lorence( Co'rtney Thorne&S%ith( Annette <aven( 0ary 0agdalan( Charlie Kelly( Ki8' Collins( and Alison 6also%" LA5C9( along with 9L9KT>A( AL#C9( ?ATA 0=>,A5A( 7#0( and 9*,A>( does a daily noonti%e ho'r&and&a&half lap swi% at San ?rancisco+s 5orth 6each Swi%%ing Pool"

9*,A>- San ?ranciscan" 5ever %arried writer and A'g%eneter with co%forta!le ,othic and va%pire erotica fetishes" Writes and plays 6log =pera( an adaptation of A'g%ented >eality" Tri%( well& ad1'sted( good&loo8ing( safe( wears ,iorgio Ar%ani s'its( ,'cci shoes and ?ran8 Sinatra fedoras- a face 'r!an( edged( shadowed( he+s artistic( vegan( %etrose:'al( pot 'ser( hac8er( 0asters degree in Co%p'ter Science fro% 4niversity of San ?rancisco so 'ses his software code&writing s8ills to also write 6log =pera a'g'%ented reality ,othic and va%pire erotica" #s a charis%a and char% top&of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" 9*,A>+s a professional liar who spends %ost of his wa8ing ho'rs dwelling on his lies for his writing( watching( o!serving&& a voye'r" <e draws and writes visionary hall'cinogenic Willia% ,i!son( Willia% 6la8e( 7ac8 Kero'ac( Allen ,ins!erg( ?riedrich 5ietFsche( Arth'r >i%!a'd( 5or%an 0ailer( Antonin Arta'd( %ythological wor8s( sha%anistic !oo8s( he is a well read %ind of stolen ideas" <as dry h'%or" Spea8s fl'ent Spanish" Acco%plished a%ate'r pianist and astrono%er" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar where he wor8s sec'rity three nights a wee8 at ,#,9> T'esdays( Wednesdays and Th'rsdays B p% to p%"

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
Page 10 of 38

=ne of the owners of ,#,9> and The ,iger 6'ilding where he lives on its top floor 9*,A> lives in a 2 !edroo% each with cedar and %irrored shelved wal8&in closet with !r'shed nic8el %irrored wardro!e doors and 2 and a .2 !aths in a (M00 s"f dar8 hardwood waln't . %ahogany floor 'nit" <as %artial arts !lac8!elt" Plays well with others" Sens'o's eyes( %editative lips( ha'nting story teller( a %an f'll and !old wih easy confidence and %aintaining his sanity thro'gh his words and his Silver Level !allroo% dancing" A dra%atic presence( i%pecca!ly dressed and tailored( lithe( he 8nows the weight of his words and software code" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding his drin8 in the pal% of his hand" Acco%plished card co'nter and 6lac81ac8 player" #n love with AL#C9" 9*,A>+s relationship with people is fo'nded on %'t'al decent respect for the other+s individ'lais% and personal dignity" 7i% 0orrison and The *oors fan" *rives a Le:'s CT <y!rid" <e inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s espresso with Kahl'a( or s'n ice tea with spear%int or pepper%int sprigs fro% his garden" ?riends with #sa!el Allende( Tess 4riFa <olthe( 7oe 6reeFe( 0artin Cr'F S%ith( 7oyce 0aynard( *on 5ovello( *ave 9ggers( Anne La%ott( A%y Tan( 7oe 9sFterhas( Kay >yan( Vendela Vida( Twin8a Thie!a'd( Straw!erry Saroyan( Ara% Saroyan( Ki Longfellow( 7ason >o!erts( ,ary Snyder( To% 0erritt( Cerridwen ?allingstar" 9*,A>( along with 9L9KT>A( LA5C9( ?ATA 0=>,A5A( 7#0( and AL#C9( does a daily noonti%e ho'r&and&a&half lap swi% at San ?rancisco+s 5orth 6each Swi%%ing Pool"

9L9KT>A- San ?ranciscan( co%forta!le *o%inatri: with a 0aster of Arts in Se:'ality St'dies fro% San ?rancisco State 4niversity" <as a part ti%e chec8er gig at the 0arina Safeway( part ti%e !artender ,#,9> and another gig as part ti%e cler8 at ,ood Vi!rations" Well& ad1'sted" 0arried to a San ?rancisco 1'dge" Spoiled" She has control of the roo%- she loo8s fro% one %an to the other as she spea8s" Ad'lt eyes( eerie( powerf'l( sed'ctive" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar where she also !artends three The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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nights a wee8 at ,#,9> Wednesdays and Th'rsdays B p% to ?ridays M p% to 2 a%"

p%( and

=ne of the owners of ,#,9> and The ,iger 6'ilding where she and her fa%ily live on its top floor in a E !edroo% each with cedar and %irrored shelved wal8&in closet with !r'shed nic8el %irrored wardro!e doors and E and a .2 !aths in a B(000 s"f" dar8 hardwood waln't . %ahogany floor 'nit" Plays well with others( Silver level !allroo% dancer" 0ethodical" Acco%plished card co'nter and 6lac81ac8 player" She loo8s li8e a pa%pered !ea'tif'l Persian cat with a loo8 at %en li8e a cat a !ird" <as three grown children( two girls( <9L95( the oldest and ,ALA*>#9L( the %iddle and a !oy( T<=>( the yo'ngest( and all fro% different fathers" 9L9KT>A+S children wor8 for C<9? as her ?irst Lie'tenants in the ,iger 8itchenP one for each shift( M a% & 2 p% Apple Shift <9L95( p% K A p% 6asil Shift ,ALA*>#9L( M p% & 2 a% C'rry Shift T<=>" Therre is a a% K A a% Sage Shift" She 8nows that 8nights errant spend their nights erring" She e:pects it" #t has always !een so( 'n droit de la vocation Kand necessary" 6log =pera ,a%er ?irst Class" A wal8ing ga%e" Cheats always( forces yo' where she wants yo'( sends yo' li8e any %ar8 an:io's for the !est of ass or sass( leaves yo' to cool yo'r heels( span8s yo' !ac8 into the ga%e and yo'r altered fate&& and %ade yo' li8e it" <andy with a whip" She+s never f'ssy a!o't her %ethods" She 8nows what she+s worth" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding her drin8 in the pal% of her hand" 9L9KT>A is the sort of sophisticated and 'nshoc8a!le who co'ld invite an earthG'a8e in for tea and a 1oint" *rives a lte %odel Porsche J T'r!o S 9dition J A Spyder" 9L9KT>A+s %otto is Qyo' don+t have any right to opinions on things 'ntil yo' 8now so%ething a!o't the%"R Listens to 7efferson Airplane( 7i% 0orrison and The *oors( Pat 6enatar( Tina T'rner( ,race 7ones" ?an of ,eorge Carlin( *o'glas Ada%s( >o!ert A" The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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<einlein" ?riends with ,avin 5ewso%( Arnold SchwarFenegger( Charlie Sheen( Larry . Lana O Stri: Wachows8i( Charles Schwa!( Karl =lson( 6arry Dito( Craig ChaG'ico( Will Vena!le( 7on ?isher( 7a%es <etfield( Prince Andrew >o%anov( Theresa Spar8s( and Lee 4n8rich" 9L9KT>A inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s 6'ndsch' Ca!ernet ?ranc( or s'n ice tea with spear%int or pepper%int sprigs fro% her ,#,9> garden" 9L9KT>A( along with AL#C9( LA5C9( ?ATA 0=>,A5A( 7#0( and 9*,A>( does a daily noonti%e ho'r&and&a&half lap swi% at San ?rancisco+s 5orth 6each Swi%%ing Pool" 9L9KT>A has !een an every S'nday ,olden ,ate Par8 roller s8ater 2-E0 to H p% since she was si: years old"

partners"

?ATA 0=>,A5A- Lives in Sa'salito on a ho'se!oat at Sa'salito Shipyard O 0arina for%ally ArG'es Shipyard O 0arina" 2EB0 0arinship Way Laccess on >oad EN Sa'salito( 1'st north of the San ?rancisco ,olden ,ate 6ridge" Well&ad1'sted( charis%atic and %arried to a 0arin Co'nty S'pervisor" ?'ll ti%e !artender at ,#,9> M p% to 2 a% ?ridays and Sat'rdays( 2 p% to p% S'ndays( 0ondays( T'edays( Wednesdays( and Th'rsdays" =ne of the owners of ,#,9> and The ,iger 6'ilding" She is the !'ilding and !'siness operating %anager for her five ,#,9>

A fata %organa is the %ost !iFarre of s'perior i%ages" There is so%ething 'nnerving a!o't watching reality !end !efore one$s eyes" There is what one Q8nowsR to !e tr'e( and that which one can see thro'gh an eye or telephoto lens or !inoc'lars K with ?ata 0organa( the three are diffic'lt to reconcile" So%ething is happening on the %ind+s horiFon" While so%eone s'ffering fro% the %adness of love e:ha'stion co'ld( however 'nli8ely it %ay see%( conceiva!ly %ista8e deception for love" 0irages cannot !e held in one$s hand K they appear so%e distance away( and li8e rain!ows can only !e followed( never The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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reached" 0irages( fro% the Latin %irare( %eaning Qto loo8 at( to wonder atR( are nat'ral optical pheno%ena K they are real( o!1ective events( that only ca'se pro!le%s for 's when we interpret the% incorrectly" They are for%ed !y the !ending( or refracting of L9* L#,<T rays thro'gh layers of air of differing te%perat'res( a pro1ection giving a shi%%ering wet appearance and appear th's giving the i%pression that they are closer than they really are" 0a8es far&a&way o!1ects see%s to tower in" Then there are ?ata 0organa K an #talian ter% referencing 0organ le ?ay( the elfin( shape& shifting half&sister of King Arth'r" #n o'r conte:t( the ?ata 0organa is also a co%plicated( rapidly changing s'perior %irage( a co%forta!le ,othic *o%inatri: that display inverted o!1ects( stretched landscapes and other weirdness of s%o8e and %irrors" 0irages( these fata %organas( have long left 's spell!o'nd" Their power to play tric8s on o'r %inds endlessly fascinates" 4ses 'nlit cigarettes Ldoesn+t s%o8eN li8e her fedoras" <as 0aster of Arts in *ra%a fro% San ?rancisco State 4niversity" ?ata 0organa+s %otto is QAs a h'%an !eing do !e %ore than an a%ate'r at it"R ?an of 6ette *avis( 6ette 0idler( Annette 6ening" ?riends with Annette 6ening( Phil ?ran8( Clint 9astwood( 0aria 0'lda'r( 6ar!ara 6o:er( Walter 0'rch( >o!in Wright Penn( 0ontgo%ery 0c?ate( 9dwin Cat%'ll( Pernell >o!erts( Sean Penn( Andy Sa%!erg( 6renda Chap%an( ,eorge L'cas( 6ill >afferty( 6arry Levinson( Pat Pa'lsen( *on 5ovello( Peter Coyote( *avid Cros!y( 6onnie >aitt( Peter Tor8( *avid Strathairn( <'ey Lewis( Lars 4lrich( >o!in Wright Penn( Charlie C'nningha%( Kevin Li%a( *avid ?incher( Kathleen C'inlan( Terry 0c,overn( >o!in Willia%s( Van 0orrison( 7ohn Lasseter( Connie 5ielsen( Scott Th'nes" <as a refined( classically !ea'tif'l face" She is not 8noc8o't gorgeo'sP there is a s%o8y 8ind of sens'o'sness a!o't her" She is poised( cool( in co%plete co%%and of herself( and spoiled" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar" Plays well with others" *rives a JBH red 8it 0organ" Silver level !allroo% dancer" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding her The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
Page 14 of 38

drin8 in the pal% of her hand" Acco%plished card co'nter and 6lac81ac8 player" Kno!!y 8nees( stringy( foal gaw8iness( a gardener so 's'ally has a peeling s'n!'rn( scratches( !r'ises and an 'nderstanda!le a%o'nt of dirt 'nder her nails" Listens to the 6l'es( 9tta 7a%es( 6illie <oliday( 7anis 7oplin( >o!ert Cray( Chris #saa8( ,aye Adeg!alola" She inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s Kahl'a on ice( or s'n ice tea with spear%int or pepper%int sprigs fro% their garden" ?ATA 0=>,A5A( along with 9L9KT>A( LA5C9( AL#C9( 7#0( and 9*,A>( does a daily noonti%e ho'r&and& a&half lap swi% at San ?rancisco+s 5orth 6each Swi%%ing Pool" ?irst&rate 6log =pera player"

7#0- <as that +oh so self&i%portant 0arin attit'de +ca'se he+s got a 0arin address" #s a charis%a and char% top&of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" 7i% is a dar8 0arinite( a creat're of the physical( see8s lots of se:" Lives at anti&children racist senior trailer par8 0arin Valley 0o!ile Co'ntry Cl'! in 5ovato( California since he was BB" <olds %artial arts 6lac8 6elt" 0ore than co%petent with weapons" Always ar%ed personally with nine&ro'nd ,loc8 2M( five&ro'nd S%ith O Wesson sn'! nose "EA revolver( C>KT 4lti%a With 6lac8 6lade( >aider # 6oot Knife( %ace( r'!!er !'llets( !lan8 !'llets" A!'sed as a child" <appily drafted !y Ar%y o't of high school( later ,eneral *ischarge for 8illings witho't orders" Well&endowed( several ti%es divorced" A!'sive( stal8er( Peeping To%( drin8er( s%o8er( self&ind'lgent( White S'pre%acist( li8es to wear wo%en+s hot pin8 7oc8ey string !i8ini panties and often leis'rely drops his circa JM2 Levi+s B0 white !oot c't !'tton fly 1eans to t'c8 in his shirt( e:co%%'nicated 0or%on( pirate The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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tattooed( !allroo% dance troller( dr'gstore cow!oy in high heeled cow!oy !oots( California licensed g'n dealer and California private investigator . !o'nty h'nter( has wo%en+s high heel fetish" Li!ertarian" *rives a restored grey and !l'e JA 9l Ca%ino he 8eeps 'p hi%self" Always carries aro'nd a VA stress !all he inevita!ly sG'eeFes" San ?rancisco se: cl'!s reg'lar" =ne of the owners of ,#,9> and The ,iger 6'ilding" <as a stor% in his %ind" *oes not always play well with others" Acco%plished card co'nter and 6lac81ac8 player" Listens to To!y Keith and ,ary Allan" #nto C'entin Tarantino+s video Chic8s With ,'ns" #n love with AL#C9 who he has on a pedastal" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding his drin8 in the pal% of his hand" ?riends with 0ichael Savage" >eg'larly does contract wor8 for ALA>#C . ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> and 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS" 7#0 inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s >'ssian >iver Pliny the 9lder or sha8en not stirred 0a8er+s 0ar8 !o'r!on with cr'shed spear%int leaves" 7#0( along with 9L9KT>A( LA5C9( ?ATA 0=>,A5A( AL#C9( and 9*,A>( does a daily noonti%e ho'r&and&a&half lap swi% at San ?rancisco+s 5orth 6each Swi%%ing Pool" 7#0 is a first&rate 6log =pera player"

C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795- 6achelors degree in 0'sic fro% San >afael( California *o%inican 4niversity( paid for !y her night life wor8ing at the San ?rancisco se: cl'!s" ?'ll&ti%e !artender at ,#,9> M p% to 2 a% ?ridays and Sat'rdays( 2 p% to p% S'ndays( 0ondays( T'edays( Wednesdays( and Th'rsdays" C#5*3 ,>9959 is one of the owners of ,#,9> and The ,iger 6'ilding where she lives on its top floor in a !edroo% with cedar and %irrored shelved wal8&in closet with !r'shed nic8el %irrored wardro!e doors and 2 and a The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
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.2 !aths in a (B00 s"f dar8 hardwood waln't . %ahogany floor 'nit" Learning well to play well with others" Prag%atic( h'%oro's( talented( !rea8ing glass ceilings" 3=45, C#5*3 is !eginning to loo8 at %en li8e a cat a !ird" Acco%plished tr'%peteer" <as the ,iger ha!it of holding her drin8 in the pal% of her hand" C#5*3 ,>9959 drives a !l'e a'to%atic Toyota 0atri: S>S" She inhales %ari1'ana thro'gh a Vapol'tion and drin8s PK Tootsie >olls K Pearson >anch orange 1'ice and Kahl'a on ice( or s'n ice tea with spear%int or pepper%int sprigs fro% her garden" ?irst&rate 6log =pera player"

0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99- 0arin Co'nty California lawyer" The power of technological terrorist weaponry is insignificant to the power of the dar8 side of the ?orce that 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS wields" With the a!ility to 8ill with the wave of a hand and a conscience that$s clear eno'gh to tort're yo'ng wives and enco'rage the destr'ction of entire fa%ilies( co8e&head 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 is not one to !e %essed with" =h no( fear hi% yo' sho'ld" This cold&hearted 0arin Co'nty lawyer is fa%o's for !etraying tro'!led clients there!y %a8ing hi%self tons of cash and ene%ies" Lives in his office at 20 5ye St( San >afael( CA JHJ0 " 4nder&endowed( circ'%cised !adly and i%potent( 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS lives !y the %antra- TWhat+s worth doing is worth doing for %oney"T With his !ad long hair piece and frilly Li!erace . A'stin Powers+ *oing 6allroo% *ance clothes( high&heeled ga'dy cow!oy !oots with silver sp'rs( or %en+s or wo%en+s spi8e heels( 9lton 7ohn glasses( silver chains( 0#C<A9L 6" SA049L . TW99*L9*99 is 8nown as 0r" 6ad 6reath" And if his fashion choices weren$t !ad eno'gh( this sociopath also raped the wife of his !est friend( a!'sed his children+s !and teacher+s wife and does sewer service" Wal8s aro'nd with a sneer and an 'nlit *on *iego cigar thro'gho't the whole play" As his deception and paraphilia grows( so does 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS+ . TW99*L9*99+S s'periority co%ple:" <e already feels he is a s'pre%e !eing( a!ove all %a8ing hi% so da%n relentless in his legal inco%petence( he The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
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is a snea8y 'nco%pro%ising !addie who %anip'lates with words( failing that with threats then force( and is a!sol'tely loathso%e" Always ar%ed personally with nine&ro'nd ,loc8 2M and . or five&ro'nd S%ith O Wesson sn'! nose "EA revolver" ?riends with ST9V95 SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<=( 7#0 and 0ichael Savage" *rives a red h'l8ing <'%%er < ( the 'lti%ate in environ%ental( ethical and %oral incorrectness with its ro'gh 'nco%forta!le ride and its in&the&!ase%ent f'el econo%y rating of a wi%py J %iles a gallon" *oes not play well with others" Conspic'o's Cons'%ptionist 3'ppie" <as 'ndisclosed ca%eras all over his office and ho%e" *rin8s PK Tootsie >olls K Pearson >anch orange 1'ice and Kahl'a on ice( or e:tra hot( non&fat( !'tterscotch %ocha lattU with e:tra whipped crea% and( sprin8les" #s a %ethodical and e%otionless top&of&the&ga%e 6log =pera player" ?irst&rate 6log =pera player( 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 does o'trageo's things in a search for his tr'e selfP the %'ndane day&to&day activities of life si%ply aren+t f'lfilling eno'gh" <is life( to this point( has !een nothing of note- he has a c'shy 1o! and a c'shy life with a set of friends that he felt necessary to fit in with" <owever( 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS wants to fit in and !e the !est at the sa%e ti%e( a frighteningly i%possi!le parado: that leads to his se:'al and ho%icidal advent'res( all in search of so%ething to fill that rec'rring e%ptiness inside" 6't applying deep&cleansing face %as8s( espo'sing on the hits of <'ey Lewis and Phil Collins( and G'oting the li8es of 9d ,ein and Ted 6'ndy 1'st isn+t wor8ing for 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99"

*irector Adriana 6aer- originally fro% the San ?rancisco 6ay Area( holds a %asters degree in directing fro% Col'%!ia 4niversity( Artistic *irector of Profile Theatre in Portland( =regon"

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Cost'%e *esigner 0#L95A CA5=59>=- an #talian cost'%e designer( wor8ing !oth for fil%s and stage prod'ctions" She has won three Acade%y Awards for 6est Cost'%e design( and !een no%inated for it eight ti%es"

G%est *tars + Cameo

AS#0= !y <onda as itself- The world+s %ost advanced h'%anoid ro!ot" AS#0= can r'n( wal8 on 'neven slopes and s'rfaces( t'rn s%oothly( cli%! stairs( and reach for and grasp o!1ects" AS#0= can also co%prehend and respond to si%ple voice co%%ands" AS#0= has the a!ility to recogniFe the face of a select gro'p of individ'als" 4sing its ca%era eyes( AS#0= can %ap its environ%ent and register stationary o!1ects" AS#0= can also avoid %oving o!stacles as it %oves thro'gh its environ%ent" S49 <A0#LT=5 as Chef- actress who %ade her directorial de!'t with 9ve 9nsler+s ?loating >hoda O The ,l'e 0an( then directed E other plays( !eco%ing the Artistic *irector for the Los Angeles ,ay O Les!ian Center+s Lily To%lin 7ane Wagner C'lt'ral Arts Center in 2000"

6A>>3 S#5?4L- Tran&se:'al( wo%an to %an( !ise:'al( irresisti!le to wo%en and %en who are !ewitched !y hi%" Last na%e of sinf'l as in far %ore than 's'al or e:pectedP an over& the&top e:perience" <igh&class( well&ed'cated( easy&going( char%ing( safe" ?lirtatio's( s'ave( sens'al( withdrawn and watchf'l all at the sa%e ti%e" C'ir8y( eccentric and individ'al" <'%oro's and ironic" The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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<ypnotic( ro%antic" Wears %a8e&'p" 9:cept for eye!rows and hair( which he wears !elow&collar&length with a 1'st&o't&of&!ed loo8( shaves everything" Known as The 6est Se: in San ?rancisco year after year after year" A stage actor since age E" Wants to do his !est and does his !est" 6allroo% dancer" Wor8s at ,iger Theatre since its opening" 6A>>3 listens to 7aFF and Classical tr'%pet" Partic'larly en1oys 0aynard ?erg'son( <er! Alpert and Ch'c8 0angione" A seventh&generation San ?ranciscan( spea8s fl'ent ?rench" 6orn BJ years ago in San ?rancisco at ho%e" >aised in San ?rancisco" =nly si!ling is twin sister( who C#A recr'ited" Alternates water aero!ics and yoga for an ho'r a day( and does evening 7aFFercise" #n 4S Coast ,'ard A':iliary while in high school" ,rad'ated fro% San ?rancisco+s A!raha% Lincoln <igh School" Two days after high school grad'ation %arried high school sweetheart( then enlisted in the 4nited States Coast ,'ard" While in the Coast ,'ard( learned to !e the >adio%an( and earned Associate in Theatre Technology fro% ?oothills College" 9nrolled at San ?rancisco State 4niversity LS?S4N for a 6achelor of Arts in *ra%a( Technical Theatre and *esign" Applied to Coast ,'ard =fficer Progra%( accepted" ,rad'ates fro% S?S4" <as two children" Serves a total of eight years with the Coast ,'ard( then <onora!le *ischarge" Starts progra% to change fro% a fe%ale to a %ale" ,et+s a ?riendly&?ire&*ivorce" #ntellect'al( co%pletes acade%ic ed'cation with a Ph"*" fro% 4C 6er8eley in Social & Personality Psychology as had decided since 2&years&old was a %ale( was having a !rea8down and loo8ing for res'rrection of lost a'thenticity and decency" C'rrently( in the 4nited States Coast ,'ard >eserve with the =&E ran8 of Lie'tenant LLTN" =nly 1ewelry he wears is solar powered Casio ProTre8 ,PS watch( as well as a ,PS receiver and trans%itter" 5o alcohol( to!acco or dr'gs" Tea% player( close&%o'thed( o!servant( physically fit( stays cal% 'nder press're" <e wears a a !lac8 sil8 s'it that has a grace to it( a soft( iconic feeling( and it e:'des a certain !ea'ty" Wears a thin !rainwave a%plfier i%plant in his right earlo!e( on his left an8le a 8inetic !and( and 8inetic energiFers in his footwear heels and !elt !'c8les" <is heroes are >o!ert A" <einlein( ,eorge Carlin( and *r" <'nter S" Tho%pson" Wears a <'nter Tho%pson tattoo"

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CAPTA#5 6LA*9- Angels !anished fro% heaven have no choice !'t to !eco%e devils" 0ild&%annered( 'r!ane( continental %ercenary for hire with a dar8 and %ysterio's past" The 'lti%ate narcissist( he e:h'des detached serenity" Captain 6lade is 1'st trying to 8eep his head a!ove water the only way he 8nows how" <is way 1'st so happens to involve %'rder( e:tortion( corr'ption and !lac8%ail" A profo'ndly da%aged %an( Capatain 6lade is cas'ally char%ing( !ise:'al( i%possi!ly se:y and thoro'ghly devio's" 6lac8%ail( deception( se:'al shenanigans;yo' na%e it( Captain 6lade does it" <e views hi%self as doing what he had to do( despite everything he sacrifices in the process" A violent !r'te( with a n'%!er of hit people he leads to ens're he gets his way" A coldy confident tyrant( his will to live incl'des %anip'lating( sed'cing and 8illing anyone who gets in his way" Captain 6lade is a lover( friend( allay( confident( partner to the ,iger crew as often as he is their ene%y( opponent( rog'e( sco'ndrel( and !etrayer"

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*ettings
,#,9>- San ?rancisco se: cl'!( an alternative reality whole and entire 'nto itself with its ,#,9> ,a%es( 6ar( ,rill( Pirate 6log( ,othic 6allroo% *ance and Theatre des Va%pires" =rganic( slic8( shiny( deco( clean( hip( %irrored( with neon lighting" All cost'%es are se:y( sens'al( %ini%al( elegant( classic( shiny( color sat'rated( te:t'red( layered" ,#,9> is a H&star San ?rancisco wifi dinner&theater followed !y !allroo% dancing( then se: after 0 p"%"P a hash of ga%er+s c'lt'res( c'sto%s( races( and fetishes" VSnow$ Vfalls$ thro'gh the stage lights giving %ore spatiality and di%ension to the set" The ti%e is the first Th'rsday( A'g'st B( 20 0" #t is -E0 a%"

Pacing
Slow( lang'id( 'nd'lates( 1iggles( long !eats of silence with !ody lang'age( cost'%es( %'sic( and eyes telling the story( e!!s and flows( laFy !ac8waters( deli!erate( savored( everything+s sipped not ch'gged( drawn o't( n'ances( sway( trances( tho'ghtf'l( all the ti%e in the world( rhyth%ic"

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a play by Pamela Olson
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Acts , *cenes
Act I Scene =ne K >oad Kill #n The ?ast Lane =pening- Start 04S#C The Giger Chronicles Theme *ong <er! Alpert 6ehind the >ain @ http-..www"%yspace"co%.her!alpert.%'sic.songs.!ehind&the&rain&al!'%& version&2ABA 2) L#,<T on to <9>6 ALP9>T perfor%ing" <9>6 ALP9>T P9>?=>0A5C9 ends( L#,<T off on <9>6 ALP9>T who e:its" Act I Scene =ne & >oad Kill #n The ?ast Lane" Start 04S#C 6lind 0elon+s The P'sher @ http-..www"yo't'!e"co%.watch) v/7C45igVc66A" L#,<T on to 6L#5* 09L=5 perfor%ing" C4>TA#5 opens to interior San ?rancisco se: cl'! ,#,9>" C#5*3 ,>9959 is dressed as the do%inatri: 795( and has !leached !londe hair in poodle c'rls" She ta8es a drin8 fro% a PK Tootsie >oll K Pearson >anch orange 1'ice and Kahl'a on ice( then holds her drin8 in the pal% of her hand" LA5C9( 9*,A>( 9L9KT>A( ?ATA 0=>,A5A( 7#0( CAPTA#5 6LA*9( and AS#0=( are on ,#,9> ,>#LL set( a H&star San ?rancisco wifi dinner&theater followed !y !allroo% dancing( then se: after 0 p"%"P a hash of ga%er+s c'lt'res( c'sto%s( races( and fetishes" The air is redolent with c'%in( allspice( papri8a( charcoal( %ari1'ana( >'sh and other %o'thwatering s%ells fro% the ,#,9> ,>#LL+s H&star 8itchen" Those scents( and the flavors and satisfactions they pro%ised and delivered( were the only advertsing the ,#,9> ,>#LL+s 8itchen had to ever do" CAPTA#5 6LA*9( 7#0( and LA5C9( in elegant ,othic va%pire cost'%e( sit at The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
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the !ar eating !rea8fast" LA5C9+S AG'arian tattoo on his left ar% ripples over his %'scles" There is a Vapol'tion on the !ar( as well as !ottles of >'sh and a variety of Tro1an condo%s" #n the !ar&top are screens and internet controls set to >edT'!e defa'lt" 9*,A>( 9L9KT>A( whip at her side( and ?ATA 0=>,A5A sit at the other end of the !ar eating !rea8fast" C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 prepares an espresso with Kahl'a( hands it to AS#0= !y <onda who places it in front of 9*,A>" AS#0= !y <onda wal8s !ac8 to Cindy" 9*,A> loads 'p a Vapol'tion fro% on the !ar( p'ts his %o'thpiece on it( ta8es a hit( p'ts his %o'thpiece in his poc8et( pic8s 'p his %'g of Kahl'a espresso( he holds the %'g in the pal% of his hand" LA5C9 p'ts his %o'thpiece on and ta8es a hit fro% the Vapol'tion on the !ar" C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 p'lls a ,'ndlach 6'ndsch' Ca!ernet ?ranc fro% the cooler( 'ncor8s it( sniffs the cor8( decants the !ottle( then po'rs fro% the decanter into a Ca!ernet crystal go!let( hands it to AS#0= !y <onda who places the glass in front of 9L9KT>A( who swirls the glass( and drin8s fro% it" AS#0= !y <onda wal8s !ac8 to C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795" 9L9KT>A holds her wine glass in the pal% of her hand" 7#0 stands 'p( leis'rely drops his white Levi B0 !oot&c't !'tton&fly 1eans revealing he+s wearing wo%en+s hot pin8 7oc8ey string !i8ini panties( then t'c8s in his shirt( p'lls 'p his white Levi B0 !oot&c't !'tton&fly 1eans( and !'ttons hi%self 'p" 7#0+S *ead 0en Tell 5o Tales tattoo on one ar% and his Pirate Ship on his other ar% ripple over his %'scles" C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 opens the cooler and p'lls o't a >'ssian >iver Pliny the 9lder and a Ta!asco !ottle" She opens the >'ssian >iver Pliny the 9lder and hands it and the Ta!asco !ottle to AS#0= !y <onda who wal8s over and p'ts the The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
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Ta!asco on the !ar in front of 7#0 and hands to 7#0 the >'ssian >iver Pliny the 9lder and Ta!asco !ottle"N AS#0= !y <onda as itself Lto 7#0N ,reetings( Cherie" The theater is a starship that ta8es yo' everywhere while going nowhere" LAS#0= !y <onda wal8s !ac8 to C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795" 7#0 ta8es a swig( savors the Pliny iced flavor( then he p'ts the !ottle on the !ar" C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 opens a Perrier and hands the !ottle to LA5C9" At the H&star ,iger ,rill( there is no %en'( as the %eal is what its Chef wants to prepare for yo'" C<9? is a grad'ate of the California C'linary Acade%y in San ?rancisco" Lives with her wife in a l':'rio's E(200 sf E !edroo% H and&a&half !ath flat on ,iger+s first floor( with two par8ing spaces off her ,#,9> K#TC<95 =??#C9" C<9?( played with a ca%eo !y S49 <A0#LT=5( co%es to the !ar door where she s'rveys the !ar" She loo8s as confrontational as ever" Then she leaves( satisfied" #t is -E0 a%" ,#,9> is closed( !'t its owners and e%ployees are having !rea8ast there( which is all prepared and coo8ed on site 9vergood <ot #talian Sa'sage Lin8s( ?ree >ange stea%ed scra%!led eggs( 6o'din San ?rancisco so'rdo'gh rolls with honey( and to%ato 1'ice" 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 and 7" K" =LS=5 wal8 in and sit at the !ar" =LS=5 watches hi%self in the %irrors" SA049LS wears his long hair !ad hair piece and frilly Li!erace . A'stin Powers+ *oing 6allroo% *ance clothes( !lac8 high&waist tight Latin *ance pants with Satin Stripe( pin8 0andarin Collared Striped *ance Shirt( HR wide red patent leather !ig silver !'c8le !elt( red satin seG'ined !rocade do'!le The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
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vent coat( high&heeled ga'dy cow!oy !oots with silver sp'rs( 9lton 7ohn glasses( silver chains" SA049LS ad1'sts his hairpiece that ad1'st the >edt'!e porn in the !ar in front of hi%" =LS=5 wears scr'ffy loafers( a wrin8led striped !'tton down collar shirt( has his sleeves rolled 'p his forear%s( is in r'%pled( dar8( pleated and c'ffed tro'sers too !ig for hi%( and a hip length !lac8 leather aviator 1ac8et( also too large" AS#0= !y <onda wal8s to the 8itchen then ret'rns carrying two plates it sets in front of SA049LS and =LS=5" AS#0= wal8s !ac8 to C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795" SC<==5=V9>( in cop cost'%e and ,othic %a8e&'p( stal8s in( in his high&heeled cow!oy !oots and sits down with SA049LS" SC<==5=V9> !r'shes his nose for cocaine" C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795 %i:es a PK Tootsie >oll K Pearson >anch orange 1'ice and Kahl'a on shaved ice( p'ts a straw in it( hands it to AS#0= who wal8s over and places it on the !ar in front of SA049LS who pic8s it 'p and sips it thro'gh the straw" AS#0= !y <onda wal8s to the 8itchen then ret'rns carrying two plates he sets in front of SC<==5=V9>" AS#0= wal8s !ac8 to C#5*3 ,>9959 . 795" SC<==5=V9> ad1'sts the >edt'!e porn in the !ar in front of hi%"N ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Ll'nges and whac8s SA049LS 'p side the head( and then screa%s at hi%N Sh't 'pW Where are yo'r f'c8ing %anners) 9very!ody has a little !it of Watergate in hi%" CAPTA#5 6LA*9 as played !y Ale: 0ins8y Lspea8s to 7#0N

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#f yo'r ene%y is sec're at all points( !e prepared for hi%" #f he is in s'perior strength( evade hi%" 7#0 as played !y *wight 3oa8a% Leyes conte%pt'o'sly SC<==5=V9>N #f yo'r opponent is te%pera%ental( see8 to irritate hi%" Pretend to !e wea8( that he %ay grow arrogant" CAPTA#5 6LA*9 as played !y Ale: 0ins8y #f he is ta8ing his ease( give hi% no rest" #f his forces are 'nited( separate the%" 7#0 as played !y *wight 3oa8a% #f sovereign and s'!1ect are in accord( p't division !etween the%" CAPTA#5 6LA*9 as played !y Ale: 0ins8y Attac8 hi% where he is 'nprepared( appear where yo' are not e:pected" L7#0 nods as he for8s his 9vergood <ot #talian Sa'sage Lin8s and then ?ree >ange stea%ed scra%!led eggs( eats the%( pic8s 'p a 6o'din San ?rancisco so'rdo'gh roll with honey" 7#0+S *ead 0en Tell 5o Tales tattoo on one ar% and his Pirate Ship on his other ar% ripple over his %'scles as he eats"N 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci Lad1'sts his hairpiece( then fist !'tts SC<==5=V9> who ignores itN

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Schoonover " " " ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Linterr'ptsN ,od da%n yo'" *on+t e%!arrass %e" We owe 9le8tra respect K not this godda%ned sG'alling aro'nd li8e whores" ,ive %e five %in'tes with a person+s chec8!oo8( and # will tell yo' where their heart is yo' god&da%n !i!le p'shin+ %an" 7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward Lsh'dders as he watches hi%self in the %irrors( then grips the !ar and stares straight ahead into a %irror( %'ttersN What+s with the s'dden horri!le frea8 show) ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside LsnapsN ?rea8) 0y signat're is !etter than gold !'llion" ,od has given 's two hands( one to receive with and the other to give with" So get o't of %y face godda%ned cross&dressing( 6irthday 6oy" 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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3es( we 8now that" We have total respect for yo'( Schoonover" 7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward Lwatches hi%self in the %irrors( then whispersN They+re going to fire %e " " " again" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lwith a !low to =LS=5+S head he screa%s to =LS=5N What the f'c8) 3o' %'st !e craFy to f'c8 with %e" 3o' fool W Are yo' ready to go to co'rt) #+ve read the last page of the 6i!le" #t+s all going to t'rn o't all right" 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci Lwhac8s SC<==5=V9> on the 8neeN Cal% down( 6oss" # have everything 'nder control" We+ve got platin'% A%erican 9:press cards" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lto =LS=5N

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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# can do anything # want( in or o't of co'rt" ,od proved <is love on the Cross" When Christ h'ng( and !led( and died( it was ,od saying to the world( T# love yo'"T 0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci Shit" #t+s gonna !e a long day" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lto =LS=5( cac8lesN <ot da%nW That+s why ,od %ade co'rts( and shotg'ns" Co%fort and prosperity have never enriched the world as %'ch as adversity has" 7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward Lwatches hi%self in the %irrors( then %oansN #+% gonna end 'p in 1ail over all this" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lscrea%sN 5onsenseW # wo'ld never let that happen" 3o' can always plead" 6elieve %e( %y favorite Cash Cow( yo' got nothing to worry a!o't" 3o'+re gonna contin'e pissing yo'r life away teaching !allroo% The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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dance in that ind'strial sl'% 8nown as 0arin Valley 0o!ile Co'ntry Cl'! f'll of tin&walled trailers f'll of se:ists( racists( !igots( and child&haters while dressed every night as yo'r %other" ,od will prepare everything for o'r perfect happiness in heaven( and if it ta8es %y dog !eing there( # !elieve he+ll !e there" L9L9KT>A snaps her whip at SC<==5=V9>( draws !lood fro% his ar%" <e screa%sN 7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward Lwatches hi%self in the %irrors( %oansN Plead) That+s the pro!le%" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lla'ghs( rips and claws at the !ar top( then p'nches his fist at a Vapol'tion which falls to the floor and !rea8sN

Kill the goose laying all these golden eggs) They will never loc8 yo' 'p" 5ot o't of any co'rtroo% #+% in" #f a person gets his attit'de toward %oney straight( it will help straighten o't al%ost every other area in his life" Loo8 at %e" #+ve !eco%e rich !eyond %y drea%s of avarice off the d'plicity of clients li8e =lson"

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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LC#5*3 ,>995 . 795 po'rs Li%oncello into a chilled glass( hands it to AS#0= who carries it to 9L9KT>A( who ta8es it and sips( nods her approval to C#5*3 who has !een watching" AS#0= ret'rns to the !ar" 9L9KT>A p'ts down her Li%oncello( t'rns and snaps her whip at SC<==5=V9>( draws !lood fro% his right ar%( he screa%s in anger and painN 7" K" =LS=5 as played !y 6'rt Ward Lwatches hi%self in the %irrors( cringes and whi%persN #+% " " " ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Linterr'pts( swaggers %enacingly to =LS=5( snarlsN

Stop cryingW ,et a grip on yo'rself" This is e%!arrassingW 3o'+re %y client" #f we had %ore hell in the p'lpit( we wo'ld have less hell in the pew"
Lto 9L9KT>A( la'ghs %anicallyN What the hell( it+s only property da%age" ,od+s angels often protect his servants fro% potential ene%ies" L9L9KT>A snaps her whip again at SC<==5=V9>( draws !lood fro% his left ar%( he screa%sN What the f'c8W 3o'+ve r'ined %y three h'ndred dollar shirt" 7es's( #+% a 0arin The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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lawyerW #+ll have yo' on a chain&gang in seventy&two ho'rs"

L9L9KT>A snaps her whip again at SC<==5=V9>( draws !lood fro% his left thigh( he screa%s( his hands tre%!le"N =8ay( o8ay" Where+s yo'r sense of h'%or) LStart 04S#C The *ra%atics+ Whatcha See #s Whatcha ,et @ http-..www"yo't'!e"co%.watch)v/<Cw=d1y%pDo" L#,<T on to T<9 *>A0AT#CS perfor%ing" 9L9KT>A raises her whip again at SC<==5=V9>N Ta8e a chec8) L9L9KT>A 1'st loo8s at hi% with disdain <e p'ts a h'ndred dollar !ill on the !ar" 9L9KT>A sha8es her head" <e p'ts another h'ndred dollar !ill on the !ar" 9L9KT>A sha8es again her head" <e p'ts three %ore h'ndred dollar !ills on the !ar" 9L9KT>A nods at 7#0( who stands 'p( wal8s over( pic8s 'p the five one h'ndred dollar !ills" 7#0+S *ead 0en Tell 5o Tales tattoo on one ar% and his Pirate Ship on his other ar% ripple over his %'scles"N 7#0 as played !y *wight 3oa8a% Leyes conte%pt'o'sly SC<==5=V9>N 5ow yo'+re 1'st road 8ill in the fast lane" L7#0 wal8s !ac8 and lays the five one h'ndred dollar !ills on the !ar in front of 9L9KT>A" 7#0 sits down( pic8s 'p a Ta!asco !ottle he opens( sha8es on his eggs( p'ts the cap !ac8 on( sets it down and res'%es eating his 9vergood <ot #talian Sa'sage Lin8s( ?ree >ange stea%ed scra%!led eggs and 6o'din San ?rancisco so'rdo'gh !isG'its with honey"N The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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0#C<A9L 6" SA049LS . TW99*L9*99 as played !y Stanley T'cci Lreaches into his poc8et( p'lls o't a Cocaine 6'llet( snorts( fills the Cocaine 6'llet( whac8s SC<==5=V9> on the sho'lder( hands SC<==5=V9> the Cocaine 6'llet"N <ere( Steve" Snort this" #t+ll cal% yo' down" LSC<==5=V9> snorts fro% the Cocaine 6'llet" SA049LS spea8s to =LS=5"N Whatcha See #s Whatcha ,et" Schoonover is A Very Special and Well Known Case of Aggressive Lifestyles in The Passing Lane" 5ot too %any lawyers these days who can handle a f'll case& load in 1'st a %orning and live li8e *onald Tr'%p in the afternoon and party li8e Charlie Sheen all night" Steve 8nows how to get his way" <e goes far in this world" ST9V95 T" SC<==5=V9> . ALA>#C . TW99*L9*40 . 0A>#5 PS3C<= as played !y 0ichael #ronside Lto SA049LSN <ow %any platin'% A%erican 9:press cards) We+re gonna need %ore than two" # 1'st want to lo!!y for ,od" 7#0 as played !y *wight 3oa8a% Leyes conte%pt'o'sly SC<==5=V9>( =LS=5 and SA049LSN The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane
a play by Pamela Olson
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# repeat- 1'st road 8ill in the fast lane" C#5*3 as played !y 5i88i 6lons8y Lshe ta8es a drin8 fro% a PK Tootsie >oll K Pearson >anch orange 1'ice and Kahl'a on shaved ice and loo8s over at =LS=5 who is po'ting"N Alice and # have %ore than 1'st =lson in co%%on" <e had no sense of proportionality for either of 's" =lson was always either at o'r crotch or o'r throat" There was never an in&!etween" Softening his attac8s either way wo'ld have !een 8inder and wiser" Protector and provider for his wife and son he displayed Fero responsi!ility for" 6A>>3 S#5?4L as played !y 7odie ?oster 5o's constr'isons trop de %'rs et pas asseF de ponts" We !'ild too %any walls and not eno'gh !ridges" C-RTAI. closes) The End

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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CO.TI.-E$ AT Episode / 0#%sbands *ho%ld Al(ays 'e Lo1ers Too2

Perhaps yo'r definition of love differs fro% %ine" ?eed 3o'r <ead With A Play that is 6log =pera theater a!o't secrets( se: and sass"
http3++((()scribd)com+doc+456786985+#%sbands:*ho%ld: Al(ays:'e:Lo1ers:Too:A:Giger:Chronicles:Episode

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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Ale;

ins!y Photographed 'y 7'stin 0onroe of 0onroe Land Pict're

The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
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The Giger Chronicles: Episode 7 Road Kill In The Fast Lane

a play by Pamela Olson
Page 38 of 38