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Tony Stoltzfus
Session Information
Tony Stoltzfus
Tony is a fulltime Christian coach and coach trainer and the author of Leadership Coaching, a ground-breaking how-to book on coaching skills and values. He is a cofounder of a professional Christian coach training school, and his passion is building leadership character through coaching. Tony develops coaching and training resources for bringing coaching into the church through his online resource center at www.Coach22.com. He also coaches pastors and ministry leaders through www.CoachingPastors.com.
Session Description
Much of the impact of coaching flows from helping people take responsibility to steward their own lives instead of solving their problems for them. In this breakout, a professional coach will show you how to draw solutions out of others, instead of telling them what to do, in a way that reinforces their dependence on God, builds confidence, and results in real change. We'll demonstrate and discuss several powerful asking techniques, then give you a chance to practice with a peer so you can add these techniques to your own tool kit.
Session Goal
For participants to use questions to draw solutions out of the small group leaders they coach, instead of telling them what to do
1 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
The Gathering More Information Technique Take five minutes to gather more information about the situation before you jump into problem solving.
Sample Questions Get some more specific details out on the table before you start problem solving. Help the person articulate what they care about and what outcomes they want in the situation. Give me a little background: how did that come about? Can you tell me a little more about this? Run me through exactly what happened. What did you mean when you said __________? Give me an example of what you are talking about, with specific details. What do you want in this situation? What outcome are you shooting for? What makes this important to you? Whats behind this? How is this affecting you? What bothers you most about the situation?
2 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
3 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
Sample Questions Take the exact words of their significant phrase, and insert them into the questions below: You mentioned that _______. Tell me more about that. It sounded like _______ was really important to you. Say more about that. What you said about _______ really struck me. Expand on that. I heard you say that _______. Tell me more.
4 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
Ownership Questions
Three Types of Ownership Questions Responsibility (Taking ownership of past actions)
Sample Questions How might your actions have contributed to the breakdown? What do you need to take responsibility for in the situation? What could you do that would turn this into a positive experience? Lets say this person never changes or gets it. What do you need to do to move on in life even if he/she doesnt? If you were going to respond in the best possible way to this in a way youd really be proud of in the future what would you do? Since we cant change the other person, what could change about you that would make things better? If you were still in this situation three years from now, what would that be like? What would you be willing to do to keep that from happening? Lets say God is using this situation to get your attention on something. What do you think that something would be? What do you think God is trying to form in your character through this?
5 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
6 2007 Group Life Conference 2007 Willow Creek Association. All Rights Reserved.
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