The Gift of Optimism By Yaqeen Ul Haq Ahmad Sikander

Life has no smooth road for any of us; and in the bracing atmosphere of a high aim the very roughness stimulates the climber to steadier steps, till the legend, over steep ways to the stars, fulfills itself. - W. C. Doane Life is the most complex abstract creation of God. Life is inseparable from humans until the state of death arrives. During the course of life, every one of us feels blue and down due to various challenges brought about by our lives. Grief, sorrow and stress are a part and parcel of life. We all have gone through these. What life gives us sometimes cannot be denied or repelled, so the best way is acceptance taking what life gives, and deriving positive lessons thereof makes the whole difference. We cannot stop hardships from touching us, but in the end our attitudes can either make us or break us. One of the most positive qualities which determine attitude is optimism. What is optimism? Optimism doesnt have a scientific definition; its simply expecting that good things rather than bad things will happen. Pessimism on the other hand refers to its opposite. Optimism can do miracles and can not only save us from troubles but also give us a chance to learn from these. The key to success lies in optimism. Qualities like perseverance, patience and not giving up are all related with this noble attitude of optimism. All the great and influential personalities and leaders owe their success to optimism. Optimism is not ignoring the problem but simply the best way to deal with it and learning from it for the future. Both the optimists and pessimists encounter the same problem but it is the mindset and perception which takes over and decides the result. As Dale Carnegie writes, Two people looked out of a window from prison; one saw mud and the other stars. Everybody of us must have felt disappointed at or about something atleast once in life and must have said something along the lines of "Why did this happen to me? I worked so hard, I had prayed so hard...why me?" Disappointment is natural and a part of human emotion. So what's the answer to this "Why me?" that pops up in our minds. When Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of cancer, he received worldwide letters from his fans, one of which conveyed, "Why does GOD had to select you for such a bad disease?" To this Arthur Ashe replied: worldwide, five crore children start playing tennis, fifty lakh learn to play tennis, five lakh learn professional tennis, fifty thousand come to the circuit five thousand reach the grand slam, fifty reach Wimbeldon, four to Semi Final, two to the Finals, When I was holding the Cup I never asked God "Why me?" And today in pain I should not be asking God "Why me?"

In their book Creating Optimism Bob Murray and Alicia Fortinberry reveal the fundamentals of happiness and 8 things you can do to create happiness and optimism. 1. Connection to Others at the very heart of your being. Make a list of friends you haven't contacted in a while but would like to, and call them. 2. Autonomy a feeling of independence and a sense of being in control Go to as many local establishments rather than chains as possible and strike up a conversation with the proprietor or service people. 3. Self-Esteem a function of how you perceive others view you. Catch yourself every time you make a self-deprecating comment. 4. Competence relates to how effective you feel you are. Ask the people in your life to tell you when they think you've done something well. 5. Purpose fulfilment and meaning throughout your life. Ask your friends and acquaintances to describe what they see as their purpose beyond making money or caring for others. 6. Connection to Your Body ...vital to our complete sense of self... Throw out all your magazines that feature impossibly perfect-looking men or women on the covers. 7. Connection to Nature its permanence, its beauty and power Walk in a park or other natural area for twenty minutes each day. Pat at least one dog and talk to its owner. 8. Spirituality a powerful weapon against depression... Make a list of all the things you believe in that give you comfort. To conclude, as Horace Bushnell says, The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be.

(The Author can be reached at www.yaqeenulhaq.info or can be mailed at yaqeen@ymail.com)