Listening differs from hearing

Hearing implies just perceiving the sounds while listening means listening with understanding whatever you are listening. Both the body as well as mind is involved in listening process.

 Listening is an active process while

hearing is a passive activity.

 Hearing is an effortless activity while listening is an act requiring conscious efforts, concentration and interest. Listening involves both physical and psychological efforts

Active Listening
Active listening is paying attention to other people in a manner where they feel that you hear their message and that you fully understand them.
At the core of active listening is the ability to be empathic with people, meaning that while you may not necessarily agree with them, you do understand their experience.

Listening Barriers
Pre-existing negative attitudes Distracting thoughts or environments Jumping to conclusions or completing the speakers thoughts Engaging in selective listening and listening only to what you want to hear Feeling too tired, anxious, or angry to pay attention Being in a hurry and rushing through the conversation Overlooking body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions

Qualities of Active Listeners

Desire to be other-directed No desire to defend/protect yourself

Desire to imagine the experience of the other

Desire to understand, not critique the story of the other

Desire to be other-directed
Step into the shoes of others

i.e., put yourself in the position of the speaker and observe things from his view point.

Tips for Overcoming Barriers

Be open to the information that is being communicated regardless of any pre-existing feelings or opinions. Give the speaker your full attention and dont become distracted by the environment or your own thoughts. Demonstrate a genuine desire to pay attention to the other person. Dont just think about what you are going to say next!

Tips for Overcoming Barriers

Listen completely to what the speaker has to say. Wait until the speaker is done talking before you respond. Pay attention to the emotion, tone and physical cues of the speaker. Ensure you understand the message clearly by asking questions, providing feedback or restating the message.

Skills for Active Listening

BODY LANGUAGE Examples: Leaning forward Eye contact

Nodding head

Two basic concepts of responses

The basic Reflective response:
Paraphrases the speakers words and lets the speaker know that the listener has accurately heard him/her.

The basic Clarifying response:

Elaborates on the speakers thoughts to draw out the speakers unsaid thoughts and emotions.

HURIER Model for Listening

The HURIER model details 6 sequential steps for effective listening and can be used to improve your overall listening and communication skills.
Hearing Understanding Remembering Interpreting Evaluating Responding

Practical Responses in Active Listening

Summarizing Restating (Tautology) Minimal encouragers Reflecting Giving feedback Probing in-depth Emotional attachment

Skills for Active Listening

OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS

Examples:
What happened after that?

Who was there?

What did they do? How did that work?

Skills for Active Listening

REPEAT CONTENT Examples: So what I hear you saying is . . .

Skills for Active Listening

ACKNOWLEDGING FEELINGS Examples: Youre feeling ___.

It makes you feel that . . .

Skills for Active Listening

DONT JUDGE Examples: Bite your tongue!

Anything that you would want to know more can be taken up just now ! Thanks.

Types of Listening
Types of Purposeful Listening
Discriminative Listening Comprehensive Listening Empathic Listening Analytical Listening Appreciative Listening
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Types of Listening
Discriminative Listening: Do you
accurately distinguish auditory and/or visual stimuli?

Comprehensive Listening: Do you

accurately understand the meaning (main ideas and arguments) of messages?

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Types of Listening
Empathic Listening: Do you
understand and identify with another persons situation, feelings, or motives?

Analytical Listening: Do you

analyze and form appropriate opinions about the content of a message?

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Appreciative Listening
Do you appreciate the way other people speak and think? Do you appreciate the use of effective language? Do you appreciate a members humor, persuasiveness, and eloquence?

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The Golden Listening Rule

Listen to others as you would have them listen to you. Suspend your own needs in order to listen to someone elses. Your Golden Rule may not be applicable to other cultures.
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Quotable Quote
We must always withhold evaluation until our comprehension is complete.
Ralph Nichols

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The Art of Paraphrasing

Paraphrasing
Restating what people say in a way that indicates you understand them
A form of feedback that asks Am I right? Is this what you mean?
Matches the content, depth, meaning, and language of a members message

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Practice Paraphrasing
I get really annoyed when he/she makes fun of me in front of our friends. Paraphrase:______________________________
_________________________________________

How are we going to get an A on this project if we cant even find time to meet? Paraphrase:_____________________________
_________________________________________

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Fact or Inference?
A businessman had just turned off the lights in the store when a man appeared and demanded money. The owner opened a cash register. The contents of the cash register were scooped up, and the man sped away. A member of the police force was notified promptly.
1.T F ? Someone opened the cash register. 2.T F ? The robber was a man. 3.T F ? The man who appeared did not demand money.

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