Training Program on

Assertiveness Skills
Presented By:-

Sucheta Deshpande Supriya Gouda Deepali Koli

09-715 09- 717 09-735

Training Module
Course Level: Basic through advanced Duration: 1 day Training Presented in: English Trainers: Supriya, Sucheta & Deepali Number of Trainees: 8 Venue: Vidyalankar Institute of Technology Time: 1 p.m

Icebreaker : Congratulations

Course Objectives
Understand the philosophy of being assertive.

Recognize the differences between being assertive & aggressive

Controlling emotions

Successful Strategies to become confident

Setting clear boundaries

Experiential working through simulations

Use what already works Use of quiz, management games, simulations etc.

Have You Ever Felt

guilty about saying no?
that others regard you as a pushover?

that its better to be well liked than well respected?

that outbursts of anger are appropriate? that intimidation is the only way you can get what you want?

Sounds Familiar?
If any of these things sound like you, it means you are probably exhibiting non-assertive behavior.

Realize that you are not alone. Nonassertive behavior is very common in people.

What Assertiveness is..

An

honest, direct, and appropriate expression of one's feelings, thoughts, and beliefs response that seeks to maintain an appropriate balance between passivity and aggression. for yourself and others influencing, listening, and negotiating with

Respect

Effectively

others.

Why Assertiveness Is Important?

Effective communication brings about

the achievement of individual and/or shared goals.

Assertiveness increases your ability to

reach these goals while maintaining your rights and dignity.

Quiz

Characteristics of Assertive Person

Tend to face problems promptly and they focus on solutions rather than problems. A person with an assertive attitude recognizes that each individual has rights. Defend themselves when someone else attempts to dominate them Use aggression defensively, and never offensively.

Chocolate Game

AGGRESSIVE
Meaning opinions, feelings, and wants are honestly stated, but at the expense of others

PASSIVE
opinions, feelings, and wants are withheld altogether or expressed indirectly minimizes responsibility for making decisions

ASSERTIVE
opinions, feelings, and wants are clearly stated without violating the rights of others active participation in making decisions, getting what you want without alienating others etc

Advantages

get what they want

Disadvantage s

make enemies and people avoid them

low self-esteem and having to live with others decisions

What you are???

Whats Keeping You From Being Assertive?

Fear of change. Fear of ruining relationships if you speak your mind. Fear of making mistakes Fear of displeasing others Fear of disapproval Lack confidence in your ability

The Myths About Assertiveness

Other peoples feelings and rights are

more important than yours.

You will offend other people

by being assertive.
You are not important

enough to express your feelings and rights.

ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION
Situation # 1 Your friend, who habitually arrives late for your plans, has shown up twenty minutes late for a lunch date. Youre so rude! Youre always late. "We were supposed to meet at 11:30, but now its 11:50."

Situation # 2 Your friends certain type of behaviour annoys you.

You need to stop that! Id like it if youd stop that.

Verbal Communication
Avoid fillers like uh and um and diminutives like little, only and just. Dont use Im sorry if youre not sincere or if the situation doesnt call for it. Always keep in mind your tone and volume, and how think about how they may be perceived by others.

Non-Verbal Communication
Be aware of gestures and body language. Always maintain good posture. Make sure to allow for comfortable personal space between you and the person youre communicating with.

Written Communication
Be concise and clear.
Use specific and simple language.

Use the active voice when writing, and remember to be inclusive and aware of your audience.

Assertive Listening
Let the other person know that you want to understand his/her point of view. Understand accurately what the other is

saying.
Let the other know that s/he has been

understood.
*This doesnt mean that you have to agree!

Examples:
Id like to hear your views on

Could you tell me about

Im confused about your stand on What does the situation look like from your perspective?

Nonverbal Assertiveness
Eye contact.
Posture

Facial expression
Gestures

Personal Appearance
Tone of Voice

Conflicts & Assertiveness

Deal with the situation immediately.
Listen carefully. Avoid being defensive. Ask questions. Compliment the individual/group
for having the courage to bring this to your attention.

Respond calmly and clearly. Offer alternatives.

Controlling Your Emotions

1. Breathe, relax, and remain calm. 2. Realize demonstrations of anger, shouting, and threats are never appropriate. 3. Use neutral, non-judgmental statements.

Contd..
4. Consider the other partys viewpoint and emotions. 5. Dont make accusatory statements-- blame is usually a

dead-end road.
6. Check yourself before you say

something youll regret later on.

Four Steps To Saying No

1. Listen to the request

2. Say no immediately
3. 4. Give a reason for your refusal Offer to find an alternative

Assertiveness Tips
Actually use the word "no" when declining. Pay attention to what others are saying and let them know that you are listening. Anger may seem like a quick fix, but it will get you nowhere fast. Yelling until you are blue in the face will only come back to haunt you later. Be aware of your gestures and how you hold and present yourself.

 Always ask questions when clarification is needed to avoid misunderstanding. Look for ways to solve the problem so all parties are satisfied. Make sure your body reflects confidence Try to think win-win Dont assume you know what the other persons motives are Avoid feeling guilty

It Doesn't End Here !!

Think about the situations you encounter

where you would like to be more assertive.

Develop an action plan: what will you do differently in the future in order to be more assertive?

"Let's build bridges, not walls

-MLK, Jr.

THANK YOU