Thesis Statement

General (too broad/too narrow)

Space exploration is good for youth

Average

Space exploration has 3 benefits to the society.

Strong

Space exploration can yield exciting new

technologies, rally patriotism, and inspire
youth to study science.

Thesis Statement
General (too broad/too narrow)

Computers are important to our lives.

Average

There are three main advantages of computers to

people.
Strong

Computers have become an essential part of our

educational communities, our business
interactions, and our personal lives.

Thesis Statement
General (too broad/too narrow)

The Detroit Lions are a horrible football team.

Average

The Detroit Lions are a horrible football team for three

reasons.
Strong

Due to a lack of coaching continuity, poor draft

choices, and a series of injuries, the Detroit Lions have
failed to achieve their full potential.

EVIDENCE,
EVIDENCE,
EVIDENCE!

The following examples of lecturers comments indicate they feel

the student has a problem in developing an argument in their
written assignments:
"You have made some good points but you have not

substantiated them."
"Where is your evidence for this claim?"
"You need to show me that you have done the reading on this
topic."
"I know the literature myself so you don't need to just tell it all
to me: What I want to know is - what is your position?"
"Your argument here contradicts your starting position"

Think of quotations as evidence for your main

point/argument.

If used correctly, quotations will make your argument stronger,

but they cannot stand by themselves (i.e. the reader needs to
know the evidences purpose). For example, in a murder trial a
piece of evidence might be a bloody rag. However, this
evidence is useless unless it is clear whose rag it is, where it
was found, and what it implies for the trial.

Make sure that readers know the purpose and context for
every quotation in your piece.

Introduce each quotation and draw a conclusion from it.

This conclusion must relate to your thesis and thus connect to
the main argument of your paper.

Compare the following 2

paragraphs

Reading 1
Dickson (1984: 12) maintains that television

violence has a marked effect on the development of

the child. Brown (1985: 176) says that children
who watch a great deal of televised violence could
be affected for many years. The Television
Broadcasting Tribunal (1982: 16) recommends that
we should "limit the number of hours per week of
programs showing violence during children's
viewing times".

That television violence has a considerable effect on the development

of the child is not disputed. Both Dickson (1984: 12) and Brown
(1985: 176) have shown through extensive experiments that the
majority of children are affected by television violence, Brown having
extended the base of her research to longitudinal studies which
reveal that this effect is quite long-term. In the face of such
convincing evidence, the Television Broadcasting Tribunal has been
compelled to act in order to reduce the impact that increased
television viewing could have on children. The Tribunal has
recommended (1982: 16) that the number of hours per week of
violent programs should be limited during children's viewing times.
In spite of these recommendations, however, there continues to be a
significant level of violence in programs which are broadcast at prime
viewing times for children.

Debrief
Text (a) is a summary of what each researcher has

concluded, and what the TBT recommends, with no

position or argument from the writer. This means
the reader has to do a lot of work to figure out what
is going on. Most readers cant be bothered!

Text (b) uses the evidence to support the main points

of the author, and states the writers position in the

first sentence. Much less work for the reader!

Smoking does not only harm the smokers, but also

people around them. (Opinion) In fact, there are

many studies that associate passive smoking to a number
of diseases - lung cancer in particular. In 1998, The World
Health Organisation (WHO) conducted a series of studies
showing that the breathing of tobacco-smoke polluted air
by non-smokers can lead to serious harm, such as
increased bronchitis, pneumonia and other chest illnesses.
Those studies also evidenced that non-smokers are 16%
more likely to get lung cancer if their spouse smokes than
if they live with a non-smoking spouse (Fact)

Opinion / Fact / Reason

Opinion

Fact

Reason

Animals use language to communicate with each other

Arctic wolves, for example, communicate the presence of caribou

through their howls and barks. Other wolves hear the messages and
are able to meet their pack to join the hunt (Denver Zoo, 2000)

Clearly, if another animal can understand vocalized messages that tell

it the location of the food, then that animal is using language.

Opinion / Fact / Reason

The internet takes too much time away from family life.

Opinion

Fact

According to a study released by The Harris Interactive

poll in 2009, the average adult in the United States
spends 14 hours per week on the Internet.

Those 14 hours could be spent doing family activities,

such as gardening, helping children with homework or
Reason playing games.

Opinion / Fact / Reason

Phone applications are a good

Opinion financial investment.
Fact

Reason

One out of every four people owns

a smart phone.

Opinion / Fact / Reason

Opinion

Fact

Reason

People spend too much money on food.

Americans eat meals outside the home

an average of five times per week.

Opinion / Fact / Reason

Opinion

Fact

Reason

Young people are too dependent on technology.

In a study of students form five countries on four continents,

80% of participants reported feelings of loneliness and anxiety
when they stopped using technology for 24 hours.