PSYCHOLOGY OF

FORGIVENESS
-Marielle A. Rivera
 What is forgiveness?
Psychologist generally define forgiveness as a
conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of
resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who
has harmed you regardless of whether they actually
deserve your forgiveness.
 Unlike other traits,
it’s not an action or attitude.
It’s a process.

What is it? What is the result? How do I communicate it? How do I cultivate it?
  A process of the way we view
someone or something that has happened

WRONGDOING

RESPONSE/REACTION

DECISION TO FORGIVE

FORGIVENESS REVISITED

AGAIN

AGAIN

What is it? What is the result? How do I communicate it ? How do I cultivate it?
Forgiveness is a path to be walked. There
are steps along the way:
 Loss
 Anger
 Acceptance
 Learning
 Forgiveness
 Restoration

forgiveness
How to forgive?

Indirect – an internal decision to let it go and

move on in the relationship

Direct – verbal and/or nonverbal statement of

forgiveness, a deliberate act of generosity toward the
wrongdoer

Conditional – a mutual agreement to move on

if and only if the wrongdoer meets your demands
What if I refuse to forgive?
Remain tied to past hurts
Frequent feelings of anger or hostility
Chronic depression or emotional pain
Unable to change or move on

forgiveness
Effects of holding a grudge
 Bring anger and bitterness into every
relationship and new experiences
 Become wrapped up in the wrong that you can’t
enjoy the present
 Become depressed or anxious
 Feel that your life lacks meaning and purpose or
that you’re at odds with your spiritual beliefs
 Lose valuable and enriching connectedness with
others
What if I choose to forgive?
Freedom from resentment and anger
Reduced depression, anxiety, pain
Improved relationships
Psychological well-being _

forgiveness
Benefits of forgiving someone
 Healthier relationship
 Improved mental health
 Less anxiety, stress and hostility
 Lower blood pressure
 Fewer symptoms of depression
 A stronger immune system
 Improved heart health
 Improved self-esteem
 What if the
person I’m
forgiving doesn’t
change?
What if I’m the
one who needs
forgiveness?
“Forgiveness is a process. A choice you
have to make over and over, everyday
until you’re free from hurt.”
Conclusion:
• The key to all of this is to understand that forgiveness
is a process. It can take time especially if the wounds are
deep. But forgiveness opens the way for you to be
healed. Sometimes, it even restores the broken
relationship. There are stages that we go through
before we forgive others. The truth is immediately
forgiving someone isn’t always the best idea. We don’t
want to deny ourselves the right and the opportunity to
feel the feelings of hurt and betrayal. We can only work
through that which we first acknowledge.
• Forgiveness is an important action that can lead to a
place of greater healing and peace. Forgiving, and
letting go of anger and resentment, has even shown to
benefit a person’s physical health.
Thank You for Listening!
 REFERENCES:
 https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/forgiveness/definiti
on
 https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-addiction-
connection/201409/the-psychology-forgiveness
 https://www.huffingtonpost.com/roya-r-rad-ma-
psyd/psychological-stages-of-f_b_955731.html
 https://faithit.com/forgiveness-quotes/
 https://www.slideshare.net/pastorkent/forgiveness-
presentation-13142883
 https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-
health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692