Personal Relationship,

Social Relationship &

Family Structures and
Legacies
CONCISE AND BRIEF DISCUSSION OF CHAPTERS 10, 11, & 13
Personal Relationship
This is the type of relationship which is closely associated with a person and which can only
have meaning to this person.
Privacy and intimacy – 2 characteristics that define personal relationship.
 Relationships are essential to one’s happiness (Berscheld 1985 et.al)
Relationships are necessary for our survival as species and as individual.
Our attachment to our parents can predict the kind of relationships we will have in the future.
There are three styles of attachment: secure, avoidant, and anxious-ambivalent.
Hormones and physical symmetry primarily derive physical attraction. Genes are also a
determinant of how we are attracted to other people.
What is Love?
1COR. 13:4-8 STERNBERG’S THEORY OF LOVE…
Three Stages of Falling in Love
by Helen Fisher
1.Lust – is driven by the sex hormones, testosterone, and
estrogen.

2.Attraction – lovestruck phase, which involves

neurotransmitters in the brain such as dopamine,
norepinephrine, and serotonin.

3.Attachment – long-lasting commitments are exchanged, and

may lead to raising a family. Oxytocin believes to promote
intimacy; vasopressin which promotes long-term relationships
GENETIC BASES OF LOVE:
Unconscious assessment of another person’s
genes through their physical appearance. THE ROZENBERG QUARTERLY SEVERAL THEORIES
RELATED TO ATTRACTION AND LIKING:

Genes are usually determinants of good health 1. Transference Effect

Both male and female are often attracted to
2. Propinquity Effect
symmetry
3. Similarity
Pheromones – an odorless chemical found in
4. Reciprocity
urine and sweat can be detected by the nose, are 5. Physical attractiveness
involved in the assessment of a future mate, an
indication of a person’s immune system.
6. Personality Characteristics and Traits
Women are also attracted to men who smell
7. Integrity, income potential, and stability
similar to their father. of men
8. Attractiveness and Vitality of women
Preference of individuals to marry somebody who
resembles one or both of their parents.
Love and Intimacy
1. INTIMACY 2. COMMITMENT
That lovely moment when someone understands and validates Is an act of deciding to consistently fulfill and live by
us.” – Reis, Clark, and Holmes (2004) and Reis and Shaver (1998)
agreements made with another person, entity, or cause,
and where the values of integrity and respect serve as a
guide to one’s behavior and thinking.
“It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own
beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been
reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring,
human being.” John Joseph Powell, The Secret of Staying in Love”
Commitment in a love relationship is expressed
continuously in caring and loving actions for the
Being open and vulnerable to that person whom we deeply trust, beloved.
who we feel connected with, and who values us with
unconditional positive regard – Rogers

Commitment is saying YES, you are into this relationship

Communication is a key component in developing intimacy, and will stick to it for as long as possible.
where self-disclosure is practived.

3. PASSION
Is the intense state of being that drives and
consumes a person to pursue an interest, a
vision, or a person.
In terms of romantic love, passion connotes
sexual attraction, as well as intimacy.
The eighth type of love is the absence of the
three components and is referred to by
Sternberg as “non-love”.
VARIABLES RELATED TO
STRENGTHENING COMMITMENT
1. Accumulation of all rewards of the relationship
support from the partner; sexual satisfactions; emotional,
financial, and physical security; adventure; and novelty
2. Temptation of alternative partners
the presence of possible alternatives for another partner can
rock the relationship and destabilize the commitment of a
couple.
3. Investments made by the couple in the relationship
may include time spent together, common beliefs and
experiences, mutual experiences with mutual friends, and
bearing children. Religious beliefs reinforce commitment

SPOILERS TO COMMITMENT
1. Criticism
2. Denial of the existence of conflict
3. Contempt
Someone who looks down on the party as
inferior does not give unconditional positive
regard, and aggravates the situation by
expressing superiority over the other.
“ultimate expression of disillusionment and
highly predictive of “divorce” or separation.
RESPONSIBILITIES IN A
RELATIONSHIP
1.Be responsible for what you think and say to
the other person.
2.Be responsible for what you promise to do
or not to do.
3.Ensure the relationship is mutually
beneficial.
4.Respect the other party or parties involved.
5.Be ready to provide support when needed.
SOCIAL RELATIONSHIP
- is a broad definition of how we interact and behave with
other people, and how they interact and behave with us.
- We learn to cooperate with others in achieving a
common objective. What differentiates personal
relationship with social relationship is the degree of
intimacy and vulnerability we offer to other people. The
more intimate and vulnerable we are with another, the
more personal our relationship is with the person.
SOCIAL INFLUENCE – are things that change people’s
behavior, belief, and attitude as a result of an action of another person or
group.
1. Compliance.
2. Identification
3. Internalization
4. Conformity
5. Conversion
6. Minority Influence
7. Reactance
8. Obedience
9. Persuasion
LEADERSHIP AND FOLLOWERSHIP
THEORIES
1. Trait Theory Authentic Leadership
2. Behavioral Theory 1. Leadership is situational.

3. Participative Theory 2. Leadership is non-hierarchical.

3. Leadership is relational.
4. Situational Theory
4. They walk their talk
5. Transactional Theory
5. They have a high level of
6. Transformational Theory comfort being themselves.
LEADER-MEMBER EXCHANGE HEROIC LEADERSHIP by CHRIS
THEORY LOWNEY, 2003 (SOCIETY OF
 states that a leader’s effectiveness JESUS PRINCIPLES)
is measured by the quality of his
relationship with his followers, and  SELF-AWARENESS
different types of relationships can INGENUITY
evolve between the leader and
follower in a certain work situation. LOVE
HEROISM
ROB GOFFEE AND GARETH JONES SIMON SINEK (2009)
“WHY” type of leader is usually
AUTHENTICITY the visionary
SIGNIFICANCE “HOW” type of leader is the
realist who is able to see how to
EXCITEMENT work out a vision;
COMMUNITY “WHAT” type of leader is the
builder who provides the details
on how to get things done.
FAMILY STRUCTURES AND LEGACIES
The definition of FAMILY has
changed and continues to change
as lifestyles, social norms, and
standards are also shifting.
FAMILY – “is a group of individuals
living under one roof and usually
under one head.” – Merriam
Webster Online Dictionary
FAMILY – “two or more persons
who share resources, share
responsibility for decisions, share
values and goals, and have a
commitment to each other over
time.” (Belen T.G. Medina, Ph.D
(Medina, 2001)
Gregorio Alfonsin C. Andoyo, The
Filipino Family and Filipino Values)
 THE 4 ESSENTIAL TYPES OF FAMILY INFLUENCE OF FAMILY STRUCTURE
STRUCTURES ON THE ADOLESCENT

NUCLEAR FAMILY
1.
1. For the nuclear family, the values, social
skills, and behavior are directly learned from
the parents or primary caregivers.
2. THE SINGLE PARENT 2. For a single parent family, the absence of
FAMILY one parent (either the father or the mother)
may create an impact on the growing child
who would normally look up to authority as
3. THE EXTENDED role models.

FAMILY 3. Extended families have both positive and

negative influence on the child. The presence
of grandparents provides stability, anchoring
4. THE CHILDLESS or rooting to the family’s history; appreciation
of the family heritage and traditions. However,
FAMILY it may also create confusion to a child.
ALBERT BANDURA’S SOCIAL
LEARNING THEORY
1. LEARNING TAKES PLACE THROUGH
OBSERVATION (MODELING)
2. MENTAL STATES ARE IMPORTANT TO struggle for independence and self-
LEARNING, WHICH MEANS THAT A
CHILD’S LEARNING CAN BE SELF-
REINFORCED OR REWARDED,
3. NOT ALL LEARNING CAN LEAD TO
CHANGES IN BEHAVIOR.
1. Parents of adolescents need to
understand the challenges involved in
their development, such as their
autonomy, the formation of their
identity and roles, and learning the
value of fidelity in the process.
2. Parents can serve as the models
their adolescents can emulate while at
the same time supporting their
development toward young
adulthood.
 PARENTAL AUTHORITY AND
PARENTING STYLES
1. Authoritative Parenting is a key factor
in the psychological development of an
adolescent, and it is believed to foster a
healthy and positive impact on the
adolescent’s development (Papalia and
Feldman 2012; quoting Baumrind 1991,
2005)
-Parents that insist that their child learn
important values, norms, and rules but are
also willing to sit down to listen and
negotiate with them should they resist.
(e.g, curfews)
-About exercising control over child’s
behavior but not the child’s emotions,
beliefs, and self-concept.
2. Neglectful Parenting Style – is one of the
most harmful styles of parenting that can be
used on a child.
3. Permissive Parenting Style – also known as
indulgent parenting is another potentially
harmful style of parenting. These parents are
responsive but not demanding. They tend to
be lenient while trying to avoid confrontation.
Few rules are set.
4. Authoritarian – also called, strict parenting,
is characterized by parents who are
demanding but not responsive. Expects
children to follow a strict set of rules and
expectations. They usually rely on punishment
to demand obedience or teach a lesson.
 FAMILY HEREDITY OR GENETIC INFLUENCE
AND ENVIRONMENTAL INFLUENCE
-are factors in the personal development of children. Aside
from physical characteristics that are often passed down
from one generation to the next.
GENOGRAM
- is a graphical map of a family’s history that
1. OBESITY OR LEANNESS traces and illustrates patterns in its structure
and characteristics using special symbols to
2. DIABETES AND OTHER describe relationships, major events, diseases,
DISEASES traditions, social, and personal beliefs and
rituals, cultural heritage, religious beliefs,
3. INTELLIGENCE value systems, philosophies, about life, and
the dynamics of a family over several
4. PERSONALITY TRAITS (40%- generations.
50%) such as TEMPERAMENT
 Thank You Very Much!
That In All Things God May Be Glorified!
Mrs. JULIENNE ROSE P. SABALLA, LPT, RGC