Some tips for writing stylish sentences

Grammar and Style

Grammar and Style
Grammar is about rules.
Grammar and Style
Grammar is about rules.

Style is about choices.

1. Eliminate wordiness.
WORDINESS: When there are words in your sentences
that don’t add anything to the sentences’ meaning.

The opposite of “wordy” is “concise.”

1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: The dogs who were barking outside in the alley next to
my house kept me up and awake all night long.
1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: The dogs who were barking outside in the alley next to
my house kept me up and awake all night long.

Concise: The dogs barking in the alley kept me up all night.

1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: My sister is a nice, kind person who cannot understand
or comprehend how other people in our town can be so mean
and cruel to people.
1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: My sister is a nice, kind person who cannot understand
or comprehend how other people in our town can be so mean
and cruel to people.

Concise: My sister is a nice person who cannot understand how

others can be so mean.
1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: The struggle for liberty and freedom is a struggle that
has gone on for a very long time indeed.
1. Eliminate wordiness.
Wordy: The struggle for liberty and freedom is a struggle that
has gone on for a very long time indeed.

Concise: The struggle for liberty has gone on for a long time.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term ACTION here includes physical actions . . .

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term ACTION here includes physical actions . . .

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term ACTION here includes physical actions as well as non-

physical actions.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term ACTION here includes physical actions as well as non-

physical actions.

BELIEVING CARING ANALYZING

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term CONDITION refers to a “state of being.”

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term CONDITION refers to a “state of being.”

The sun is larger than the moon.

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term CONDITION refers to a “state of being.”

The sun is larger than the moon.

Organic chemistry is a challenging subject.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term CONDITION refers to a “state of being.”

The sun is larger than the moon.

Organic chemistry is a challenging subject.
My brother stands at 6 feet, 2 inches.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

The term CONDITION refers to a “state of being.”

The sun is larger than the moon.

Organic chemistry is a challenging subject.
My brother stands at 6 feet, 2 inches.
Tom votes Republican.
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

ABSTRACT NOUNS are verbs turned into nouns.

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

ABSTRACT NOUNS are verbs turned into nouns.

“investment”  “to invest”

2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

ABSTRACT NOUNS are verbs turned into nouns.

“investment”  “to invest”

“interpretation”  “to interpret”
2. Be concrete.
To express actions and conditions, use specific verbs,
adverbs, or adjectives rather than abstract nouns.

ABSTRACT NOUNS are verbs turned into nouns.

“investment”  “to invest”

“interpretation”  “to interpret”
“sight”  “to see”
2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
Concrete: We discussed the matter.
2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
Concrete: We discussed the matter.

Abstract: A review was done of the relevant regulations.

2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
Concrete: We discussed the matter.

Abstract: A review was done of the relevant regulations.

Concrete: The team reviewed the relevant regulations.
2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
Concrete: We discussed the matter.

Abstract: A review was done of the relevant regulations.

Concrete: The team reviewed the relevant regulations.

Abstract: The intention of the committee is the improvement of

the company morale.
2. Be concrete.
Abstract: We had a discussion of the matter.
Concrete: We discussed the matter.

Abstract: A review was done of the relevant regulations.

Concrete: The team reviewed the relevant regulations.

Abstract: The intention of the committee is the improvement of

the company morale.
Concrete: The committee intends to improve company morale.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
Ellen walked to class today.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
Ellen walked to class today.

“Ellen”  “walked”
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
When she was a child, Jennifer believed in the tooth fairy.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
When she was a child, Jennifer believed in the tooth fairy.

“she”  “was” “Jennifer”  “believed”

3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
In 2016, Beyoncé recorded Lemonade.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
In 2016, Beyoncé recorded Lemonade.

Subject = the word “Beyoncé”

3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
In 2016, Beyoncé recorded Lemonade.

Subject = the word “Beyoncé” Agent =

3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
In 2016, Beyoncé recorded Lemonade.

Subject = the word “Beyoncé” Agent =

MATCH
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
Lemonade was recorded by Beyoncé in 2016.
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
Lemonade was recorded by Beyoncé in 2016.
Subject = the word “Beyoncé” Agent =
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
Lemonade was recorded by Beyoncé in 2016.
Subject = the word “Lemonade” Agent =
3. Match subjects and agents.
When it is appropriate, make the subject of your verb the
agent of the action the verb describes.
VERB: A word that describes an action or condition.
SUBJECT: The word or phrase in the sentence that names who
or what is doing/being what the verb describes.
AGENT: The actual who or what is performing the action or in
the condition that the verb describes.
Lemonade was recorded by Beyoncé in 2016.
Subject = the word “Lemonade” Agent =
MISMATCH
4. Let beginnings point back.
Use the beginning of your sentences to refer to (a) what you’ve
already mentioned or (b) knowledge that you can assume you
and your reader readily share.
4. Let beginnings point back.
Use the beginning of your sentences to refer to (a) what you’ve
already mentioned or (b) knowledge that you can assume you
and your reader readily share.

Example: John Oliver is perhaps the most accomplished satirist

working today. Satire, as mentioned previously, attacks those in
power in the name of truth.
4. Let beginnings point back.
Use the beginning of your sentences to refer to (a) what you’ve
already mentioned or (b) knowledge that you can assume you
and your reader readily share.

Example: John Oliver is perhaps the most accomplished satirist

working today. Satire, as mentioned previously, attacks those in
power in the name of truth.

Revised: Satire attacks those in power in the name of truth.

Perhaps the most accomplished satirist working today is John
Oliver.
4. Let beginnings point back.
Use the beginning of your sentences to refer to (a) what you’ve
already mentioned or (b) knowledge that you can assume you
and your reader readily share.

Example: The number of wounded and dead in World War I

exceeded all the other wars in European history. One of the
reasons for the lingering animosity between some nations today
is the memory of this terrible carnage.
4. Let beginnings point back.
Use the beginning of your sentences to refer to (a) what you’ve
already mentioned or (b) knowledge that you can assume you
and your reader readily share.

Example: The number of wounded and dead in World War I

exceeded all the other wars in European history. One of the
reasons for the lingering animosity between some nations today
is the memory of this terrible carnage.

Revised: Of all the wars in European history up to that point,

none exceeded World War I in the number of wounded and
dead. The memory of this terrible carnage is one of the reasons
for the animosity between some European nations today.
5. Let endings point forward.
Put your most important ideas at the end of your sentence, as
well as the information you intend to develop in the next
sentence.
5. Let endings point forward.
Put your most important ideas at the end of your sentence, as
well as the information you intend to develop in the next
sentence.

Example: I crashed the car last Saturday afternoon, on my way

home from a trip to the supermarket and the Laundromat. I
escaped without a scratch, though the car was totaled.
5. Let endings point forward.
Put your most important ideas at the end of your sentence, as
well as the information you intend to develop in the next
sentence.

Example: I crashed the car last Saturday afternoon, on my way

home from a trip to the supermarket and the Laundromat. I
escaped without a scratch, though the car was totaled.

Revised: Last Saturday afternoon, on my way home from a trip

to the supermarket and the Laundromat, I crashed the car. The
car was totaled, but I escaped without a scratch.
5. Let endings point forward.
Put your most important ideas at the end of your sentence, as
well as the information you intend to develop in the next
sentence.

Example: President Abraham Lincoln was assassinated on April

14, 1865, while watching a play at Ford’s Theater. The nation
was shocked by this act of violence.
5. Let endings point forward.
Put your most important ideas at the end of your sentence, as
well as the information you intend to develop in the next
sentence.

Example: President Abraham Lincoln was assassinated on April

14, 1865, while watching a play at Ford’s Theater. The nation
was shocked by this act of violence.

Revised: On April 14, 1865, while watching a play at Ford’s

Theater, President Abraham Lincoln was assassinated. This act
of violence shocked the nation.
6. Don’t double complexity.
If your sentences feel tangled, observe this rule: The more
complex your thought is, the simpler your grammar
ought to be.
6. Don’t double complexity.
If your sentences feel tangled, observe this rule: The more
complex your thought is, the simpler your grammar
ought to be.

Democracy has been around since the time of Socrates

and has continued into the present day, in countries such as the
United States, where the citizens hold power under a free
electoral system. Even though democracy operates differently
in different places, all democracies have two characteristic
features, which are that all citizens have equal access to power,
and that all citizens enjoy universally recognized liberties,
including freedom of thought, freedom of expression, and
freedom of speech.
6. Don’t double complexity.
If your sentences feel tangled, observe this rule: The more
complex the thought is, the simpler your grammar
ought to be.

Democracy has been around since Socrates’s day. It

continues to thrive today. Democracy operates differently in
different places. However, all democracies share two
characteristic features. First, all citizens have equal access to
power. Second, all citizens enjoy universally recognized liberties.
These liberties include freedom of thought, of expression, and
of speech.
Dear Sam:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind,
thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior.
You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings
whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be
yours?

Jane
Dear Sam:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind,
thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior.
You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings
whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be
yours?

Jane

Dear Sam:

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind,
thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and
inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no
feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let
me be?

Yours,
Jane