|



|
|
   

1. To discriminate among passive,

assertive and aggressive behaviors.
2. To enhance assertive requesting skills.
3. To enhance assertive refusing skills.
 aodule Structure
_  
u àirculating questionnaire- 5 min
u Identification of assertive, passive and
aggressive behavior- 10 min
u Division of class into groups- 5 min
u Role play by students ± 15 min
u Explain assertive, passive and aggressive
behavior- 15 min
u Evaluate their understanding of assertive,
passive, aggressive behavior-10 min
 aodule Structure
_  
u | quick review of previous session-5
u Explain how to make a request.-10
u Role play on making request under different
situation- 15
u Explain how to refuse a request-10
u Practice refusing a request-15
u Review and closing -5
SESSION 1
|  
!

|

Identification of |ssertive, Passive and
|ggressive Behaviour
 "#$ "
r Y

 . You are watching TV when
your elder brother comes in and switches
to another channel without asking.

What do you say/do?

 å"%"%&
1) You leap up, yell abuse at your brother
and change the channel back
2) You say or do nothing
3)You tell your brother that you are watching
a programme that you really want to see
and find out how important the other
programme is to your brother.
Y



|'"''"
#"%' "($"
##"$$)*
"+"#"%,()
$'
 å"%"%&
1) Pick up and tell her she really needs to get over it. Even
though it hasn't been very long since the breakup, you
just don't have the energy to deal with this, and she
needs some tough love to snap her out of it.

2) Pick up and talk to her until she feels better, even if it

takes hours.

3) Pick up and tell her that you're tired, so you can only talk
for about 10 minutes tonight, but want to hear how she's
feeling.
Y


*""%-
./#"#'%)

"%0
 å"%"%&
1)Tell them that you value their friendship a lot, but
are becoming increasingly frustrated with their
lack of timelines. If it doesn't change, you see
less of them.

2)Just learn to deal with it by bringing a book to

read or talking on your cell phone while you wait.
It's not worth the trouble of bringing it up and
risking a big conflict.

3) Finally blow up at them one day, and then stop

making dates with this friend
Y


You are at the dinner table and someone
starts smoking, which offends you.
 å"%"%&

1) Hey, that smoke is terrible!

2) You suffer the smoke in silence.
3) I would appreciate it if you wouldn't smoke here.
Y


#"(#"('
"$$$"("%+$)
*1
 å"%"%&
1)Tell them you don't appreciate the jokes, and
start making more neutral jokes yourself to set a
different tone. If the jokes don't stop, you may
report them to Human Resources.

2) aake inappropriate jokes at their expense.

3) Say nothing. You don't want to make things

worse.
 â%
Y

 1-|ggressive, 2-Passive, 3-|ssertive
Y


1-|ggressive, 2-Passive, 3-|ssertive
Y

 1-|ssertive,2-Passive, 3 -|ggressive
Y

 1-|ggressive, 2-Passive,3 -|ssertive
Y

 1-|ssertive, 2-|ggressive,3- Passive
 Role play
Example for role
play
 
|
r You¶re waiting in a shop to be
served and someone pushes in
front of you.
r What do you say/do?
 Observations
r Did the person in the queue stand in an assertive way,
i.e. upright, relaxed ?

r If not, did they tend to be too casual or tense?

r Was eye contact appropriate?

r Did they tend to look at the floor, or their hands rather

than at the other person?

r Was the tone of voice appropriate?

 SITU|TION-2
r Your boss asks you to do overtime. You¶ve
already made plans for the evening. Your
boss tries to insist that only you can do the
job.
r What do you say/do?
 Observations
r What did you like about the way she/he
talked to his/her boss?

r What didn¶t you like in his/her behavior

r Do you think his/her behavior was

justified?
|ssertiveness

rå"&

r 2"
$#&

rå"
&
 
r |ssertiveness is the ability to communicate your
needs, feelings, opinions, and beliefs in an open
and honest manner without violating the rights of
others
r |ssertive style of behavior is to interact with
people while standing up for your rights.

r Being assertive is to one's benefit most of the

time but it does not mean that one always gets
what he/she wants.
WHY SHOULD I BE |SSERTIVE?

|




å2|*
å|

3


22
43



 å2|å44 
1. Helps you become self-confident
2. Increases self-esteem
3. Gain respect of others
4. Improve communication skills
5. Improve decision-making ability
 2å5
|


1. Be honest and direct about your feelings,
needs, beliefs.
2. Express yourself firmly and directly to
specific individuals.
3. Be reasonable in your requests
4. State your viewpoint without being
hesitant or apologetic.
5. Be honest when giving or receiving
feedback. àont..
 2å5
|


'. Learn to say ³no´ to unreasonable
expectations.
7. Recognize and respect the rights of those
around you.
8. Use appropriate tone of voice.
9. Be aware of body posture/language
10. aaintain eye contact.
11. Use ³i´ statements to express self
 |ggressive Behavior

r Seeks to dominate or control

r Interested in winning
r Generates negative, hostile feelings
r àauses resentment
 Passive-|ggressive Behavior
r àomplaining
r Ignoring
r Sniping
r Sarcasm
r Forgetting
r Procrastinating
r Lateness
r Sabotage
 5%4"'"'
|'' | 6"
rStanding tall
r |ngry rShy
rLooking at people
r Yells rScared
r Stamping rTalking low
rSmiling
rLooking at floor afraid
r Hitting
rEmbarrassed
r Words hurt others r|sking
rHunched over
r aean r uiet
rSaying no

rFeels good about self

 #$"|1"(

)*""'"$
%")
True
False

.) "%'#'%(
#,'
'")

True
False

7) #"''" %'

""% '
")
True
False
)å'#%""&
r How attractive you are.
r How much money you have.
r Your communication skills.
r How many people are on your side.

-)å'"+"#$" "&
r Being loud and controlling the conversation.
r |greeing with everything or being afraid to speak.
r Judging others and refusing to speak.
r Speaking openly and valuing both your and others' opinions.

8) "($%$$,(%"
"'')
True
False
l)|$$""%"
)
True
False

9)å'$%" "
""%""&
r Slamming doors and making a lot of noise.
r Standing in a corner and avoiding people.
r aaking eye contact with others and looking relaxed and open.
r àrossing your arms and glaring at others.
 â%
)*""'"$
%")
|nswer: True. Everyone has a
right to stand up for his or her
beliefs. That is the definition of
being assertive.
.) "%'#'%(#,
' '")
|nswer: False. Saying something you know will hurt
others is just being mean. It's important to speak up for
yourself, but you can do that without hurting those
around you. If you know what you are about to say may
hurt someone, but you still feel you need to say it,
consider phrasing your statement as kindly as possible.
For example, say something complimentary or pleasant
at the same time, or acknowledge it's a difficult topic and
handle it discreetly
7) #"''" %'
""% '")

|nswer: False. Demanding and bullying is being aggressive, not

assertive. You can stand up for your thoughts and beliefs without
forcing them on others.
)å'#
%""&
|nswer: Looking attractive, having money, or having people back you
up may help some people be assertive, but you don't need these
qualities to be assertive. In fact, a true test of assertiveness is if you
are willing to take a stand even if you know others might not agree
with you or be awed by your looks or money.
 -)å'"+"#$
" "&
|nswer: |ssertive behavior is speaking one's mind but
doing so without talking over others or ignoring others'
opinions and feelings.
 8) "($%$$
,(%""'')

|nswer: False. You can speak up for yourself and be assertive without
being aggressive. Remember, being assertive doesn't mean being impolite.
|s long as you respect that other people have different
feelings and opinions, people will respect you when you speak.
l)|ssertive people are usually conceited and
overconfident.

|nswer: False. If someone comes across as conceited or

overconfident, it is probably because they are being inconsiderate
to others. That is not the same as being assertive. Being assertive
is walking the fine line between valuing your own opinion as well as
others.
9)Which of the following physical behaviors would
indicate to others that you are assertive?
|nswer: Looking as though you are interested in a conversation and
open for discussion is one way to show you are assertive. |voiding people
or intimidating them is a sign that you are too passive or aggressive.
SESSION 2
 2#"(":
r Recommend one verbal behavior:
³I want«´
r Recommend that non-verbal behaviors
include standing up straight, eye contact,
arms at side.
r Explain what words to use
 Role Play
r Divide the class into teams of '-10
members

r |ssign them different situations

 Situations
r The classroom is noisy and you cannot
study your lesson. What is your goal?
What can you do? What else?

r You need a laptop to help you with your

coursework. How do you convince your
parents to buy one for you?
 Situations
r You are doing a group project and not all
the group members are doing their part on
it. You are carrying the load. What is your
goal? What can you do? What else?
2":
r Decide what the goal is in the situation. Is
refusing the way to go?

r Think of what you will say to refuse.

r Practice it and then review what you did

Rules for refusals
È Refusals should be honest.
È Refusals often begin with ³no.´
È When you speak to the other person, stand up straight,
look the other person in the eye,
È Keep your hands and arms at your side - not waving up
in the air.
r It is okay to say:
u No, I won¶t do that.
u No, this is my lunch money. I will not give it to you.
u I already have plans for Saturday. I cannot play that day.
6"'":
 Situations
r Let¶s go watch a movie.
r I want to borrow your new bike.
r Please give me your notes, I haven't studied
anything for tomorrow¶s test.
r | boy or girl asks to cut in front of you in the
movie -ticket line. You don¶t want to let him/her
cut in
r Your colleague tries to offload some of his work
onto you when clearly you do not have the time
for it.
 |


 

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